October 2017
The Health Issue Making Your Health a Priority
SUZI LULA THE MOTHERHOOD EVOLUTION
Freeing Mothers of Mom Guilt
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Delicious Meals to Promote Mental Health
KANDI BURRUSS BALANCING REALITY, MOTHERHOOD & A GROWING EMPIRE
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05 Letter from the Editor 06 Fall Fashion: How to Shop in Your Closet 07 Mom with Impact: Tara Dunsmore, Pink Ink Tattoo 12 Meet Nikki Knowles: Changing How Women Give Birth 14 Stay Fit Mom, Tracy & Krista: Maintaining Fitness for Life
18 Suzi Lula, Author of The Motherhood Evolution: Freeing Mothers of Mom Guilt 26 Haute Momma: Fall Fashion You Already Have
20
Meet Kandi
30 Making Your Health a Priority 32 3 Delicious Meals to Promote Mental Health 36 Moms on the Go: GlamCon 2017 Celebrates Breast Cancer Survivors & Fighters
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PRIORITIZE YOUR HEALTH. Editor-in-Chief Vonna Matthews
Contributing Designer Photo Editor Cover Photography Contributing Photographer Contributing Photographer Contributing Writer
Taly Melo Krystal Jackson Elton Anderson Crystal Renee Revolution Studios Brian Lary
Editorial Office Little Elm, Texas 75068 +1-972-302-9150 | info@ceomommagazine.com CEOMOM Magazine is published by For Her Media Little Elm, Texas 75068 | +1-972-302-9150 www.ceomommagazine.com
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LETTER FROM THE EDITOR
MAKING YOUR HEALTH A PRIORITY This is one of my favorite CEOMOM issues. We are having much needed conversations about women’s health; physical, mental, emotional and spiritual. Too often, women put everything and everyone above themselves, that includes their health. Self care is relegated behind family, career, ministry and the many other obligations we have as women. I know this all too well. With being a wife, mother, entrepreneur and ministry leader, I often find myself depleted. My life becomes defined by what I can give others rather than what I do for myself. I have on more than one occasion been jealous of my husband’s ability to take care of himself and do the things that replenish him like working out and scheduling leisure activities. He encourages me to do the same, but I am riddled with guilt when I make myself a priority. In this issue, we talked with Suzi Lula, author of The Motherhood Evolution, who is on a mission to rid mothers of mom guilt. Nikki Knowles, of Dallas Birth Doulas, chatted with us about women realizing their bodies’ power to do extraordinary things. In honor of October being Breast Cancer Awareness Month, CEOMOM is spotlighting Tara Dunsmore of Pink Ink Tattoo and GlamCon 2017. Each are working to help breast cancer survivors and fighters look and feel beautiful. I pray that after reading this issue, you are encouraged to make yourself a priority. Position yourself as the queen God has created you to be. Embrace the idea that taking care of yourself impacts your ability to take care of others.
VONNA MATTHEWS Editor-in-Chief
Vonna Matthews
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There are two things we often do with every new season, switch out one season's wardrobe for another and shop. As our bodies and trends change from one year to the next, we feel the uncanny need to update our closets by visiting our favorite boutiques. This fall CEOMOM wants to help you find the perfect new wardrobe right in your own closet. As you’ve added new pieces throughout the years, your style possibilities have increased. Here are some tips that will help you maximize the style potential of what's already in your closet and save time and money. Visit page 26 of this issue to find out the Fall 2017 trends that you already have. Tip 1: Clean out your closet . We often forget what is in our closets, because they become more and more cluttered every time we add new pieces. Spring cleaning doesn't have to be reserved for springtime. Go through your closet and remove all items that you haven't worn in years or don’t fit your current style or body type. Now is the perfect time to get rid of those old Guess jeans from high school. Cleaning out your closet can be a daunting task so take your time. This may be a project that requires several days or hours. You may even want to solicit the help of a professional closet organizer. Cleaning out your closet also gives you a chance to donate items you no longer wear or host a garage sale for extra cash. Tip 2: Take inventory. Once you have cleaned out your closet, it is now easier to see what you have. Making your fall items the priority, compose a list of your items by category. Your individual style will determine the categories that are most appropriate to you. If you love color, categorize by color. Determine how many pairs of jeans you have, pants suits, dresses, boots, etc. You may write your list down or if that seems to be too cumbersome, organize by category in your closet. This takes us to tip 3. Tip 3: Organize your closet. This simple step allows you to see the items in
your closet the same way you would in your favorite boutique, by category. All pants should be together, dresses, suits, blazers, etc. As mentioned above, categorize based on your individual style. How do you select an outfit of the day? Do you start with color or clothing type? Do you prefer dresses over skirts? These are questions to ask yourself as you categorize your closet. The key is to be able to access your pieces quickly based on your style preferences. Your goal is not to change your style, but maximize the potential of your current wardrobe to fit your evolving style...without breaking the bank. Tip 4: Research and Shop. Now that you've taken inventory and
your closet is organized, you can shop in your closet based on current trends and your unique style. Find out the latest trends and determine the ones that best fit you. Pick out the pieces in your closet that match those trends. Browse through fashion magazines and books to get ideas on mixing and matching different garments. Learn more about color blocking, pattern mixing, layering and more. Remix your favorite celebrity's style to fit your own. Your style is about you so don't be confined to what others say is trendy. Have fun shopping in your closet. You will be surprised at what you can put together with what you already have.
FALL FASHION: HOW TO SHOP IN YOUR CLOSET
With the beginning of fall comes the desire to shop for your season favorites such as boots and blazers. Save money this season by creating a new wardrobe right from your closet. CEOMOM | 6
TARA DUNSMORE MOM WITH IMPACT THIS BREAST CANCER SURVIVOR IS HELPING OTHER SURVIVORS LOOK AND FEEL BEAUTIFUL THROUGH REALISTIC AREOLA TATTOOS.
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IF I COULD DESCRIBE THE ONE COMMON NEED AMONG EVERY STUDENT AND ADULT, HOPE, AND WE KNOW THAT LASTING HOPE IS FOUND IN JESUS.
For me an areola tattoo is important, because it gives closure. It closes that chapter. It’s the icing on the cake. You get to look in the mirror and feel whole again.
One in 8 women will hear the words, “You have breast cancer.” Tara Dunsmore was that one when she was only 39 years old. Overwhelmed with immediate feelings of fear and confusion, Tara began researching to determine the best treatment for her. Tara talked to CEOMOM about her journey to recovery and how she is helping other survivors feel whole and beautiful through Pink Ink Tattoo. What type and stage of breast cancer did you have? I had stage 1 and it was invasive ductal carcinogen carcinoma estrogen and progesterone positive. That means it is hormone receptive. It was a hormone type of breast cancer which is more of a common cancer. I was diagnosed February 28, 2012. Walk us through the heart of your fight. What were your immediate feelings, thoughts and fears? I was 39 years old when I was diagnosed. I didn't have any family history. I hadn't felt any lumps. This was the last thing I thought I’d have to deal with. I had a mammogram done, because I’d had one years before. My mom had dense breast so something told me to get a mammogram. That’s when
everything happened. I was card shopping with my daughter when I received the news. I could not believe it. My first thought was, “What does this mean?” I wasn’t comprehending. Then I went to the radiologist’s office and dropped off my paperwork. In the meantime, I’m talking to my husband and my children and I am still in shock. I just didn’t fit any of the criteria. I was healthy. I ate well. I worked out. I needed answers and didn’t understand. I am a rehab nurse so I broke out my nursing books and did a lot of research online. I did a lot of talking and praying. I decided to do a bilateral mastectomy. I had my mind set that that’s what I wanted. My breast surgeon, who was conservative, wanted me to do a lumpectomy and hormone treatments. I knew to have the quality of life I wanted the bilateral mastectomy was the best decision. I had a battle with my breast surgeon. After finally making a date for the first surgery, my breast surgeon told me that my surgery was rescheduled to March 29 (originally March 15), because of insurance. I am not trying to save my boobs. They don’t define me as a woman. I didn’t have that choice, because insurance and my breast surgeon
I AM A WOMAN AND A SURVIVOR.
PINK INK TATTOO IS MY PASSION AND MY FOCUS. weren’t on the same page with me. After more tests, my surgeon discovered that a bilateral mastectomy was the best choice. March 29, 2012 will be 5 years since my surgery. Having double sided surgery was an easy decision initially. On the other hand it was a hard decision as a woman. You are choosing to have part of your body removed because of a disease to save your life. It’s like amputation of a body part. It’s your breasts. Your breasts are considered a feminine part of your body and sexy. The sensation is gone. The feelings are gone. It is sad. Even until this day I can’t believe this happened. Sometimes I wish I did have natural breasts. Those days are gone. It doesn’t define me and it doesn’t make me less of a woman, because I don’t have them. I had a supportive family including my husband of 21 years, my 3 children and my sister.
What made you start Pink Ink Tattoo? Why is areola tattooing so important to a breast cancer survivor? I started Pink Ink Tattoo after having my own nipple reconstruction. My plastic surgeon said the last thing I needed to do was areola tattooing. He said there was no expert in the country. There is no one who specifically does this. He told me that I may be able to get it done by a nurse or a tattoo artist in a tattoo shop. I searched around and found someone who did it. She did it, but it was cold and painful. There were few color choices. It was an awful experience. I am grateful that someone added color, but the experience could have been better. I felt that survivors deserve more. I walked out of her shop with this overwhelming feeling that I needed to do this. I decided to train with the best in the world. You want your areola tattoo to be realistic and natural looking. I found an amazing school. Because I am a nurse, I skipped to their advance 101 class. I went to New Jersey to do one on one training with the best. We did training 12 hours a day. I knew this was my calling and my purpose. I got that needle in my hand and created a beautiful unilateral tattoo. Til this day I look at it and think how amazing it was. For me an areola tattoo is important, because it gives closure. It closes that chapter. It’s the icing on the cake. You get to look in the mirror and feel whole again. It gives you a sense of feeling that you are back to yourself. I love when my clients look in the mirror and tell me they feel beautiful. They feel like themselves. I get to live a little vicariously through my clients. They get to have the experience that I didn’t. From the time we talk to the time they walk through the door, what I get from it is so much happiness being able to watch them experience the last thing they have to do from having breast cancer. What separates me is that I am a woman and a survivor and a nurse. I don’t do other tattoos. Pink Ink Tattoo is my passion and my focus. Learn more about Tara's mission with Pink Ink Tattoo and how she spreads awareness at http://www.pinkinktattoo.com/. CEOMOM | 9 CEOMOM | 10
 I EQUATE SELF CARE WITH FULFILLING YOUR DREAMS. IT IS ESSENTIAL FOR MOMS TO FULFILL THEIR OWN DREAMS BECAUSE WE ARE MODELING TO OUR CHILDREN. ~ Suzi Lula
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Meet Nikki Knowles CHANGING HOW WOMEN GIVE BIRTH For expectant mothers, the thought of childbirth can be riddled with fear, especially first time moms who are often unaware of the power and capabilities their bodies hold. There’s a misconception that natural childbirth is reserved for a small group of women who can manage the pain. Doula Nikki Knowles of Dallas Birth Doulas, is working to shift the misconceptions surrounding childbirth. Whether you are planning a natural birth, caesarean section or are undecided, Dallas Birth Doulas works to educate, empower and support new and expectant families. CEOMOM Magazine chatted with Nikki to learn more about how she is changing how women view their bodies and childbirth. What is a doula? DONA, the organization I am certified through describes a doula as a trained
professional who provides continuous physical, emotional and informational support to a mother before, during and shortly after childbirth to help her achieve the healthiest, most satisfying experience possible. Some people refer to us as labor coaches. A doula typically is another woman, but there are some doulas that are men. We help women during pregnancy, labor and delivery and we will also do an in home postpartum visit. We are their resource throughout their pregnancy for any questions they may have such as obtaining childbirth classes, breastfeeding classes and infant CPR classes to name a few. What products and services does a doula provide? There are 2 types of doulas. There is a Birth Doula and a Postpartum Doula. I am a Birth Doula so I provide my clients with resources during pregnancy and I am with them during
childbirth. I help to educate and empower my clients during pregnancy and help to facilitate any questions they have. During labor my role is to provide the emotional and physical support that every laboring mother needs during her birth. I am available to my clients at all times for any questions they may have. If I feel that it is something they need to speak with their doctor or midwife about, I will always suggest that they do so. Doulas do not give medical advice. In addition to our very popular childbirth classes, we provide our clients access to Infant CPR, Baby Care Basics, Breastfeeding and Car Seat Safety Classes. What separates the Dallas Birth Doulas from other birthing agencies? We are not an agency, we are a collective CEOMOM | 12
SUPPORTING A WOMAN DURING LABOR, WITNESSING HER STRENGTH SEEING HER BECOME A MOTHER, THERE'S NOTHING LIKE IT. of 6 doulas. Two of our doulas are Lamaze Certified Childbirth Educators, in addition to having a doula who is a Certified Placenta Encapsulator. Dallas Birth Doulas has a great reputation in the Dallas area. Part of that is due to our accessibility to our clients. We pride ourselves on having open communication with our clients and making sure that they feel supported not just during their birth, but during their pregnancy. What inspired you to become a doula? I had a doula with my first child back in 2011 and it was such a wonderful birth experience! I got the birth that I wanted and I felt completely supported and empowered. I couldn't imagine how women had a baby without a doula and then I realized I wanted to be the person my doula was for me. My doula asked me if I had ever thought about it and after doing some research and shadowing her on a birth, I began my journey to finding my purpose. I felt a responsibility to pay it forward and with the support of my amazing husband, I decided I could do this and here I am four and half years later. What are some misconceptions regarding a doula's role in labor and delivery? A common misconception is doulas only work with women who want a natural childbirth. Dallas Birth Doulas' philosophy is "Your Birth, Your Team". Meaning, this is your birth and we will support whatever type of birth that you feel is best for you and your family. I have actually had people think that my sole purpose was to massage a mother's feet while she's having contractions. Ha! Others think that a doula’s role is to take the place of the partner and assume we are combative with the doctors, nurses or midwives. That is absolutely not true. We are there to support you and your partner. I always joke that doulas are really for dads. We help to translate "birth talk" and to help to guide them on what are the best ways to help the laboring mom. Dallas Birth Doulas has a really good reputation with a lot of the doctors, nurses, hospitals and midwives in the Dallas/Fort Worth area and that is because we respect everyone's role and know our place. We work hard to make
Photo Credit: Krystal Jackson of Gateway Designs & Photography
sure you know your options regarding childbirth and our hope is that you walk into this life changing event with knowledge, power and a new found voice. What does it mean to be a doula and a mom? Lots of coffee!! It is probably one of the craziest things I have ever done. Your schedule is so random. There are nights that I put my daughters to bed and they think they are going to see me in the morning, and I am not there. Now that one of my daughters is getting older, she has events that she wants me to attend. My husband and I try to work it out so that if I can’t be there, he is. It is really hard. There are times I have been away from my house for days. If I didn’t love what I do, I wouldn’t be able to live this doula life. It requires a certain type of sacrifice from you and your family. What advice would you give to a mom who wants to become a doula? My advice would be to have a husband or partner who is extremely supportive and who is okay with you being away from the house, sometimes days at a time. Be prepared to miss events with your kids and happy hour with your girlfriends. You will have a very unpredictable schedule, but at the same time have life changing experiences. Being a doula is not just about seeing babies being born, it is so much more. Supporting a woman during labor, witnessing her strength seeing her become a mother, there's nothing like it. Learn more at https://www.dallasbirthdoulas.com/. . CEOMOM | 13
STAY FIT MOM TRACY & KRISTA
HELPING MOMS MAINTAIN FITNESS FOR LIFE THROUGH NUTRITION AND AN ACTIVE LIFESTYLE
If you're like most moms, staying fit is a challenge defined by lack of time and too often, motivation. By the end of your day the only energy you have left is reserved for sleeping. Tracy Gifford and Krista Pool started Stay Fit Mom, a lifestyle and fitness brand, to help busy moms integrate a healthy routine into their daily lives. What started out as a blog is now a complete fitness program for moms. What is Stay Fit Mom? What are your products and services? Krista and I started Stay Fit Mom about 3 years ago. We wanted to highlight that we are busy moms with crazy schedules. We wanted to make fitness work for our crazy lifestyles. We started this blog highlighting recipes and workouts. Since then we have started nutrition coaching. We do macro nutrition coaching for about 50 women every month. It has been very exciting to see Stay Fit Mom evolve from there. It started with just a blog about our lives and how we make it all work. We still post recipes and workouts. Are there other companies like Stay Fit Mom? If so, how does your company stand out from competition?
I follow some other health and fitness women who are great. We differ, because we focus on doing your best and being a mom. We want to push that as long as we are doing our best we are okay. We are not bodybuilders and we weren't college athletes. There is nothing that separates us from the women we coach. Our relatability helps us stand out from competition. If you are a floundering mom trying to make it through the day, we understand. We were both pregnant and gained a lot of weight. We showed other women that we are vulnerable and we were able to lose the weight. What makes Stay Fit Mom a successful program for moms? We encourage moms to make themselves priority. Our biggest piece of advice that we give to our moms who want to get fit is, "Put your oxygen mask on first." We as moms are expected to take care of anybody and everybody at any given moment. Your tank ends up empty. It is very difficult to be the best mom when your needs aren’t being met. Prioritize your health first. You will reap the benefits.
Describe your philosophy about being fit and healthy. It’s not always about the way you look, but the way you feel. It’s about how you are able to make it through the day with your kids. It's about feeling good. My dad is obese. He is in an assisted living facility and uses an oxygen machine. My dad has a huge amount of health issues that relate back to obesity. That is a huge motivator for me to role model healthy living for my family. It’s not cheap to eat healthy. It costs us in time and money. I see the other side of it in terms of how my father has paid so much money in hospital and medical bills. I feel strongly about taking care of my health now so I can be a healthy grandma. What equipment or essentials do moms need for a home workout? For our at home, weekly workouts, we try not to use a lot of equipment. There are a lot of things you can do without using anything. We incorporate jump ropes, yoga mats and dumbbells. Without having any equipment you can still get in shape and see a lot of progress. You can do step ups in your backyard. You can use so many things in your home. We know how hard it is to workout with your kids. We want to make it as easy as possible. What tips do you have for moms who are starting a fitness plan for the first time? Be patient with yourself. You are not going to get in shape overnight. It took 9 months to gain that weight. Eighty percent of your fat loss is going to come from nutrition. Focus on your nutrition first. It is something that can be difficult, but it can be controlled. We work with a lot of women who don’t have time to work
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Photo Credit: Nate Grant of TNG Photo
out at all. They prioritized their health and realized that proper
CrossFit is for you. Prior to joining a CrossFit box Krista worked
nutrition is important to live a fulfilled life. They are seeing great
out at home in her garage with her husband.
results because they are laser focused on their nutrition.
TRENDSETTING MOM
We are always comparing ourselves to one another. As a new
Get more fitness tips and healthy recipes at http://www.stayfitmom.com/.
mom, you can get really lost in wondering if you are doing enough. You struggle with mom guilt. It’s a lot and so much to handle. There’s nothing wrong with saying that we can’t do it all. I am going to focus on this one thing and do it really well. We help women focus on that one thing so that they can see great success. What is your workout regimen? We both do CrossFit. CrossFit has done so much for my body. I was so terrified at first. I thought it was for super athletes. I thought you had to have prerequisites. The gym where we cross fit is owned by a mother and son, and it is the most
As a new mom, you can get really lost in wondering if you are doing enough. You struggle with mom guilt. There’s nothing wrong with saying that we can’t do it all. I am going to focus on this one thing and do it really well.
welcoming environment. It doesn’t matter your background. CEOMOM | 16
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You talk about the culture of guilt that has become synonymous with motherhood. How do moms rid themselves of constant mom guilt? I have this saying that moms feel guilty when we take care of ourselves and when we don’t take care of ourselves. Guilt is something that is within us to remind us when we go off course. When a child takes candy from a store there is necessary guilt to help him see he has gone off course. However, we have created a culture of unnecessary guilt. Our culture sends us the message that doing the laundry or making dinner is more important than the connection we have with our children. Our culture tells us that we get our value from what we do, what car we have in our driveways and the square footage of our houses. When a mother tries to take care of herself she goes against the cultural message that tells us it's not okay to take care of yourself and feed your spirit. When we try to nourish the part of us that makes us feel alive, we end up feeling guilty not because there is anything to feel guilty about but because we are going against the cultural norm. I don’t feel guilty anymore. When I take care of myself first I like my tone of voice better and I like practically everything about me better. My son does, too. He likes when I am more patient with him. It proves that my self care is a gift to him. He is the beneficiary of my self care. Mom guilt is an epidemic. I believe that women have generations of martyring ourselves. We are the first generation that lives so far away from our biological families. We are so isolated from our families. Our mothers did not feel the pressures that we feel because we had aunts and cousins and grandparents. We still have the same tasks but we are doing them alone. Moms have to acknowledge the isolation and be okay with going against cultural norms to reduce or eliminate mom guilt.
SUZI LULA
"THE MOTHERHOOD EVOLUTION"
FREEING MOTHERS OF MOM GUILT No matter how hard we work or how much we mean to our families, mothers are often stifled by the notion that we are not doing enough. Mom guilt plagues us and causes overwhelming feelings of inadequacy. Suzi Lula, Spiritual Counselor, has written one of the most relevant and thought provoking books for today's mom. Her new book, “The Motherhood Evolution,” dissects the varying layers of motherhood to reveal the dangers of negative thinking and lack of self care. It provides practical solutions that force women to identify the origins of their self doubt. CEOMOM had a candid conversation with Suzi about the power of making self care a priority and realizing your self worth beyond motherhood. In “The Motherhood Evolution” you encourage mothers to shift their thinking to realize the importance of self-care. Why is it important for mothers to take care of themselves first? I know all of us mothers are doing the best we can. Motherhood is so challenging in the first place, but trying to do a good job as a mom from an empty place makes it more challenging. We are often inundated and trying to do the most important job on the planet on empty.
What are some practical things moms can do to practice self care? I believe in self care as a way of life. That can feel overwhelming to moms. I like to start with really simple examples. I have music on when I am making scrambled eggs in the morning. When we take these simple actions it changes the melatonin in our brains. I have music playing in the background all the time. Music can help bring some lightness, dance and play. It can also be soothing and relaxing. I also have fresh flowers in the house. I have my son help me put them in vases. I love to light candles. The mom sets the spiritual tone in the home. What inspired you to write “The Motherhood Revolution?” One day my son said to me, “Mom, you need to smile more.” I was a joyous person before I had my son. The task of motherhood was weighing on me. I needed to reconnect with my own spirit to be the mom he needed me to be. We are all spiritual beings. My son was so much more connected with his spirit than I was to mine. If I don’t have a $20 bill, I can’t give you a $20 bill. I want him to stay connected to his heart and authenticity. If I can’t connect to mine, I can’t help him stay connected to his. Looking at him and seeing how I was falling short inspired me to write this book to help other moms. We want to have this connected time with our kids. Caring for ourselves allows us to reconnect and provide for ourselves some of the things we were missing as children. Caring for my heart, my emotions and my needs is a way to give myself what I didn’t get when I was little. Emotional self care is such an important part of my book. Emotional self care is the most important aspect of self care. In chapter 10, “A View from the Mountaintop,” you tell the story of a mom, Becky, who needs more fulfillment in her career. How important is it for moms to pursue their dreams? I equate self care with fulfilling your dreams. It is essential for moms to fulfill their own dreams because we are modeling to our children. I send the message to my son that it is important for him to live a fulfilled life. A woman who has a daughter and is fulfilling her dreams and bringing herself joy is modeling for her daughter that it is possible. All moms’ dreams aren’t necessarily work related. Some moms feel fulfilled staying home with their children, but many moms are called to spend time outside of the home. We need to break through this ceiling, showing that it is possible to be a mom and be fulfilled. I want women to go from feeling guilty for taking care of themselves to doing it unabashedly. When I hear the phrase CEOMOM, I want to shout from the rooftop. It gives moms permission to not feel guilty whether you want to stay at home or go to work. Follow your heart. Learn more at http://suzilula.com/motherhood/.
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I don't care how much money they're paying me, I have to be there for my family. CEOMOM
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A
Actress, songwriter, music producer, reality television star, restaurateur and entrepreneur are all roles that Kandi BurrussTucker plays on a daily basis. It's no wonder her impact is immeasurable in film, music and television and among her millions of fans. If you ask her what her most important roles are, she will respond without hesitation, being wife and business partner to her husband Todd, and mother to her 14 year-old daughter Riley and 19 month-old son and inspiration behind the Raising Ace brand, Ace, and stepmom to 19 year-old, Kaela. CEOMOM enjoyed our candid conversation with Kandi as she told us her key to success and how she balances all of her diverse roles. Congratulations on all of your success and new business ventures. You have been a powerful businesswoman for years now. How do you maintain balance and consistency with your career and family? It is kinda hard sometimes, because there is so much going on. The main thing I try to do is schedule my family events the same way I do business. I put all of my family events on the calendar for everybody who works on my team. They can see it so they won't try to overbook me or make me miss anything that is important for my children or my husband, family and close friends. That happens a lot. You have a lot of people working with you and they try to attach you to everything all of the time, not knowing that you were supposed to be at a basketball game that day or at the kids' picnic. I put those things on the calendar just like everything else. I don't care how much money they're paying me, I have to be there for my family. As far as day to day, I just make sure I try to take my daughter to school everyday and pick her up when I can. I don't care how late I've been up the night before, I get up to have that time with her.
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Do you want your children to follow in your footsteps? For Riley. singing is just something fun to do. I don't feel like I'm pushing her to make singing a career. She likes to sing. For now, we're going in the studio to see what she can do. She did Better Late than Never. She loves the responses she's received from everybody. People have been showing her so much love. My daughter is a Nicki Minaj fan. Nicki Minaj congratulated her on the song. That just made her life. I will support my daughter's dreams no matter what she wants to do whether it's singing or being a lawyer. I just want her to be productive and successful. What is the toughest part about being a mom and being on a sometimes controversial TV show? It's been hard. It's so much craziness happening on the show. You have people who want to say negative things to your children on social media, because they feel like they can,because you're on reality TV. Riley has been a part of this journey with me on reality TV since I started. The discussion happens mostly with her. I remember when I didn't allow her to watch the show. She pleaded her case and said that she needed to know what was going on so she can address other kids when they say something. I realized she was right. It helped her to build tough skin and know what to say. When my stepdaughter first came to Atlanta, dealing with the show was hard for her. She got really upset with things that were being said on the show, especially regarding her father. She had to learn that you just have to live your life. It was an adjustment period. I feel like when they get used to it, it makes them stronger people. Describe your passion behind the Raising Ace brand. I wanted to create something that would grow along with Ace. Everybody loves Ace. Everybody is giving so much love to Ace. During my pregnancy a lot of people were asking me, "What kind of products are you using?" I was thinking we should have products that go along with what we use for Ace. As he grows up, that's why it's called Raising Ace, I know there's going to be more and more things we feel work really well and those that don't. We make products that go along with what works with children along Ace's age. Where do you see the brand in 5 years? I would love to see Raising Ace become a household brand. We want Raising Ace to be a go to product line. You have to have convenience as a mom. You have all of these options so you have to figure out what you need. We are trying to make things easier for moms. What does a typical day look like for Kandi Burruss? My day consists of getting up early, dropping Riley off at school, and heading back home to get myself together Issue 27 | 234
WHEN YOU HAVE A NEW BABY, BREATHE AND REMEMBER IT IS ONLY FOR A MOMENT. YOU DON'T HAVE TO BE PERFECT. before Ace wakes up. I may go to the restaurant depending on what we need to do that day. The last few weeks have been focused on the restaurant, because that has been a lot of work. I check emails and make sure everything is taken care of like paying bills. I sign all of my checks. I am also taping with the Real Housewives of Atlanta several months out of the year. Now that my group Xscape is coming back together I have to add that to everything I have to do. Right now, we are getting ready for our tour. We recently saw you on Bounce TV's Saints and Sinners television show. Describe that experience. Last year, I made acting a priority for myself. I've always wanted to act, but I never made it a priority. I have had a lot of opportunities to come up within the past few months. The scene I did on Saints and Sinners was with Jasmine Burke, and she was amazing. They made it easy for me and I appreciated the opportunity. CEOMOM | 24
Will we see you in anymore acting roles? Definitely. I am in the upcoming movie, Never Heard, where I play a mother, Tara, who is struggling with drug abuse. It was a really good role, because it was totally different than who I am as a person. When you're doing something that people don't expect you to do, that's always fun. What's next for Kandi Burruss? I have the tour with the group Xscape and the movie, Never Heard. My personal desire is not to add another business right now. I want to focus on the ones I already have and make them greater and focus on my family. I also want to do more with Kandi Cares this year. What advice do you have for new moms who are navigating through this journey called motherhood? For new moms, I would say it's okay to get help. Moms feel like they have to be supermom. They feel guilt for things like getting a babysitter. There's nothing wrong with getting a babysitter. Have that date night. It takes a village. For instance, when Riley was younger I had a friend who was in medical school. We were both single parents. She and I would piggyback off each other. When I had something to do she would take both children and vice versa. It's always good to have a friend who has a child around the same age as yours so you can have that support. You need someone there who can feel your pain at that moment. When you have a new baby, breathe and remember it is only for a moment. You don't have to be perfect. Catch Kandi on the 10th season of Real Housewives of Atlanta this November 5. Check http://www.thegreatxscapetour.com/ for tXscape our dates.
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HAUTE MOMMA
Fall Fashion
That's already in your closet
Fall continues to be the most popular season when it comes to fashion. From New York Fashion Week to what's trending on the streets, people can't wait to trade in sandals for boots and light jackets for short trench coats. Fall 2017 is marked by colors and patterns we've seen before, but with a nice twist to fit the coolness that comes with the fall season. Here are a few trends you may already have in your closet.
MID LENGTH SKIRT With the fall season comes cooler weather. It's not as cold as winter so you don't have to break out the coats and scarves, but adding more clothing to your outfits is a must. The mid length skirt is known for its classy appeal. It's not too short to be inappropriate and not too long to be reminiscent of granny's closet. Pair it with a mid length sleeve shirt and heels to make this classic look even more appealing. CEOMOM
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MOODY FLORALS Floral was in season during the summer and has made its way to fall. The femininity of floral patterns make it perfect for blouses, dresses and even blazers. The more intricate floral patterns pair well with lighter, solid colors. Wear a dark floral dress or pair a navy blue floral blazer with a white shirt and pants. Add a pop of color with yellow heels.Â
PALE PINK Pale Pink is the opposite of bold red, but makes a statement of its own. Its subtlety allows it to be paired with darker colors to create an inviting contrast. Keep it simple with a chocolate top and pink skirt or a pale pink blouse with nude pants.
HEAD TO TOE RED Red is the most vibrant and attention getting fashion color of the season. If worn correctly, it adds boldness to any ensemble. Go bold with head to toe red this season. Try a beautiful red wrap dress that can be worn to work with a blazer or dressed up with a faux fur shawl and the right accessories.Â
The Importance of Making Your Health a Priority Taking Care of Mind, Body & Soul by: Brian Lary Pregnancy brings about the need for immediate and sometimes drastic changes to a woman’s lifestyle to accommodate the development of her unborn child. There are specific dietary and physical restrictions and requirements to ensure the baby’s growth. Women eagerly make the necessary adjustments, making their physical, mental and emotional health priority during pregnancy. Yet too often, the self care that was given during pregnancy significantly decreases once the baby is born. Women make the baby the priority, reducing their needs to the basic requirements for survival. If women continue to put self care last, personal development may cease. Moms since the beginning of time have loved their kids more than themselves. Growing up, we all vowed to raise our children to have better lives than we had. We aim to care for them in productive and healthy ways defined by the perfect mix of love, discipline and support. After becoming parents, we realize the challenges that come with maintaining that ideal balance. We find ourselves living according to the same principles and ideas we were raised with, being overprotective and trying to sacrifice our own lives to give our children the best. That’s not wrong, but once you forget how to love yourself how will your kids know how to love you or even themselves? Every child has a mind of his own. No matter how many times you preach to your children, as they grow up they will make their own decisions. So why stop to watch life, not remembering that you’re living one yourself. Sometimes you might have to throw yourself a party for your own sanity. Giving attention to your children is needed, but if you don’t take the time to pay attention to yourself, quite naturally it could cause stress and depression. Do things that make you feel good whether it’s eating right, scheduling regular physical exams, exercising, writing and spending time alone. It’s imperative for moms to love themselves first, because you will never be able to build your kids if you neglect the woman you are. You were a woman before you became a mother. After the baby is born, continue to nourish yourself. Make you a priority. You deserve it. CEOMOM | 30
IT’S IMPERATIVE FOR MOMS TO LOVE THEMSELVES FIRST, BECAUSE YOU WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO BUILD YOUR KIDS IF YOU NEGLECT THE WOMAN YOU ARE.
OATMEAL & FRUIT BOWL Vitamin D deficiencies are associated with higher rates of depression. Besides helping our bodies absorb calcium, Vitamin D helps to reduce depression. Vitamin D can be found in fruits, milk and fish. For breakfast, enjoy a bowl of cold oats with soy milk (or the milk of your choice). Oatmeal doesn't have to be warm. You can make it cold with milk as you would a bowl of cereal or prepare it the night before for overnight oats. Mix and match with the toppings of your choice such as fruits, nuts and spices. Top it off with a glass of orange juice.
INGREDIENTS 1 cup Oats 1 teaspoon of Chia Seeds, a teaspoon of chia 1/4 cup Soy Milk (or milk if your choice) 1 Banana (sliced) 1 cup Peaches (sliced) 1 tablespoon of Peanut Butter Agave Nectar to taste
WE HELP YOU GET WHAT YOU NEED IN LIFE.
INSTRUCTIONS 1. Add the oatmeal to the bottom of your bowl or mason jar. 2. Add the sliced banana. 3. Add the peanut butter. 4. Add the agave nectar. 5. Add the chia seeds. 6. Pour in your milk. 7. Enjoy! Eat cold the same day or prepare the night before
DELICIOUS
MEALS
To Promote Mental Health
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FRUIT & SPINACH SALAD Folate is great for helping with depression. Leafy green vegetables such as spinach, fruits and nuts are packed with folate or folic acid. Here’s a spinach salad recipe that contains high amounts of folic acid. Mix and match the ingredients based on your favorite salad toppings.
INGREDIENTS 3 cups Fresh Spinach 1/2 cup Strawberries or fruit of your choice (chopped or sliced in half) 1/2 cup Cranberries or second fruit of your choice (cut in half) * Add a protein to round out this meal. 1/4 cup Walnuts, Chopped 1/4 cup Pine Nuts 1/2 cup Raisins
WE HELP YOU GET WHAT YOU NEED IN LIFE.
For the Dressing: 2 tablespoons Extra Virgin Olive Oil 1 tablespoon Lemon Juice Salt and Pepper, To taste
INSTRUCTIONS 1. In a medium salad bowl add the fresh spinach, strawberries, cranberries, walnuts, pine nuts and raisins. 2. Toss everything together. 3. In a mason jar, mix the salad dressing ingredients. 4. Gently toss the salad ingredients with the dressing. 5. Enjoy!
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Grilled salmon contains folic acid and vitamin D, both of which are great mood stabilizers.
INGREDIENTS 2 Garlic Cloves (minced) 2 teaspoons Lemon Juice 1/2 teaspoon Fresh Rosemary (minced) salt and Pepper to taste 4 Salmon Fillets (6 ounces each)
INSTRUCTIONS Mix all marinade ingredients and pour over salmon. Marinate for up to 1 hour. Place fillets over medium hot coals. Grill for 3 to 4 minutes on each side.
WE HELP YOU GET WHAT YOU NEED IN LIFE. GRILLED SALMON CEOMOM | 34
POLISHED EXISTS to gather young professional women to navigate career and explore faith. www.polishedonline.org
Moms on the Go
GLAMCON 2017: A BEAUTY EVENT CELEBRATING BREAST CANCER SURVIVORS AND FIGHTERS Glamour welcomes you as you walk through the doors of GlamCon 2017. The room is as beautiful as the event wants women to feel. The day was filled with makeovers, shopping for beauty products that are safe for breast cancer survivors and fighters, panel discussions, music, motivational speaking and more. Shantaquilette Williams, founder of Style Follows Her and The Pink Peppermint Project, knows all too well the impact breast cancer can have on women physically, emotionally and spiritually. She has walked the journey with an aunt and several friends, some of whom are survivors and others who won their battle on the other side. Inspired by a friend who never let breast cancer steal her joy or beauty, Shantaquilette started GlamCon to make
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survivors feel beautiful inside and out and to celebrate them as glamorous conquerors. GlamCon, the first event of its kind in Dallas, Texas, aimed to educate, inspire and empower women to take charge of their lives as they add this new chapter. There were several vendors on hand providing products and services to cater to the beauty needs of women impacted by breast cancer. Koffee Day Spa, Kendra Scott, The Oatmeal Store and The Hair Geek were just a few. The Aveda Beauty Institute was on hand to provide beauty makeovers to the glamorous conquerors. Emceed by WFAA Channel 8 senior crime and justice reporter, Rebecca Lopez, the day was filled with inspiring words from guest speakers and women whose lives have been transformed by their breast cancer diagnoses. We heard tearful stories from women who are now survivors, women who are about to undergo their first treatment and women who just completed their last treatment. Moderated by author and speaker, Erika Ellis, the panel discussion candidly addressed everything from knowing your breasts and getting regular tests to understanding the needs of your support system. Five year breast cancer survivor Tara Dunsmore, “Don't forget about your friends and family. They are going through this battle with you.” Dr. Kat Smith, an Intimalogist, encouraged survivors, fighters and their families to seek counseling when needed. “There is nothing wrong with seeking one on one help. The problem is if you delay getting the help you need. Get a therapist. Talk to a friend. Don't walk alone.”
Photography by: Toyia Jordan
Awards were given to breast cancer survivors and fighters. Award packages included, but were not limited, to 5 day and 4 night trips to Cancun and full makeovers including hair and makeup and clothes. Clothes were sponsored by Cato.
There is nothing wrong with seeking one on one help. The problem is if you delay getting the help you need. Get a therapist. Talk to a friend. Don't walk alone.
The day was capped off by a beautiful remembrance ceremony led by Tanya Baker, Co-Pastor of the Incredible Church in Dallas, Texas. From encouraging words to tearful stories to beautiful makeovers, GlamCon 2017 inspired, rejuvenated and uplifted. CEOMOM was blessed to be a part of this inaugural event. We look forward to 2018.
A portion of the proceeds from GlamCon 2017 will go to the Pink Peppermint Project and The Bridge Breast Network. The Pink Peppermint Project was founded in 2017 to provide beauty and wellness services programs to breast cancer patients and survivors. Learn more at https://www.pinkpeppermintcares.org. CEOMOM | 37
n ar Le e! or m A homeschool co-op created to help children excel academically, spiritually, and culturally through individualized learning and small groups www.ncacoop.org
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