5 Helpful Tips on How to Meditate Properly, Like an Expert
There is a lot of conflicting info out there about how to meditate. But don’t worry--here’s how to meditate properly so you can meditate like an expert. Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Denise Everheart. I have been meditating for nearly 50 years, teaching in various capacities for over 20 years, and have attended decades of advanced programs. You could say I’m a bit of a meditation expert. I would say I am definitely a meditation enthusiast! For many, the word “meditation” triggers feelings of failure and defeat. Quite often, when friends and family hear that I meditate daily, their responses range from “I could never sit still” to “I tried once but I couldn’t stop all my thoughts.” And some have even shared that they tried to learn on their own by reading a book but gave up. Between misconceptions about meditation and trying to teach ourselves something that really requires a trained meditation instructor’s guidance, it’s no wonder that so many of us feel we cannot meditate at all. But I am here to tell you that everyone, yes even you, can learn how to meditate properly using these 5 tips!
#1 Taking the seat Although this might seem like an obvious point, proper meditation posture is vital. It’s always advisable to sit when you meditate instead of lying down. Whether you sit on a sofa, chair, or the floor, make sure you don’t lie down or recline your body. Lying down tells the body it’s time to sleep and may result in deep sleep rather than deep meditation. Sitting with a straight back is also important. However, feeling comfortable is equally important to ensure a quality meditation session. Using a meditation cushion or pillow under your sits bones will help you keep your back straight. But if you are struggling to find a comfortable position there is no
shame in using a chair. Just make sure the chair isn’t too fluffy and comfortable- you don’t want to sink into the chair, you want to sink into meditation! If you find yourself fidgeting, or feeling distracted by aches in the body, practice some yoga asanas or Sukshma yoga (subtle yoga) beforehand to release any physical tension. Even shaking out your hands prior to meditating can help. Doing these will allow you to more easily relax into a seated pose for the duration of your meditation.
#2 Drop any preconceived concepts We have all seen pictures in magazines or on TV of a person meditating, sitting perfectly still with a serene smile on their face. We instantly imagine that they must be experiencing a blissful state of consciousness rather than the reality that they are just a model posing. Or perhaps we heard a friend brag about their amazing blissful experience during one of their meditation sessions. And if we read any books on the subject, we have likely added even more ideas about what meditation should look and feel like. When you take all these concepts with you when you sit for meditation it is no wonder that many feel frustrated and sadly sometimes even give up the pursuit of inner peace. See, we tend to attach judgments to any meditation experience. We think that a “good” meditation should look and feel a particular way. And if our meditation doesn’t look and feel like that preconceived idea, we might not stick with a daily meditation practice. In fact, we think we’re ”bad” at meditation and stop before we have experienced any benefits. The most intelligent thing to do is to drop any preconceived ideas about what meditation should look and feel like. Give meditation a chance to surprise you!
#3 Do not try to control the mind Ready for a trick question? Who here thinks a good meditation is one where you have no thoughts? ; ) You’re not alone! Inner peace is often equated with not being bothered by our thoughts that otherwise seem to be stuck on a treadmill with no off button. We expect meditation to give us that off-button access! But what if I told you there isn’t an off button? Well, not exactly. It’s more of a
volume control knob. And the first secret to accessing that thought volume control knob is to just let your thoughts be. That’s not to say that we should entertain a ‘thought stream’ during meditation. Thoughts come and thoughts go. Just like a river flowing, we can observe our thoughts as they pass by and drift away. This acceptance that thoughts are part of meditation will go a long way towards improving your meditation experience. The point here is to not resist thoughts. It’s hard to have a successful meditation when you are wrestling with your thoughts! Here’s an image for you- you’re a sumo wrestler trying to pin down just one thought, with a long line of thoughts in a queue you think you have to tackle! Pretty exhausting, huh?!
#4 Keep breathing The biggest secret to effortless meditation is in our breath. Why would how we breathe make a difference in our meditation experience? Firstly, our breath is connected to the present moment. Our thoughts may be of the past and the future, continually oscillating back and forth, but the breath is only in the present moment. When we use breathwork (breathing exercises) before sitting for meditation, we are able to access that thought volume control knob and begin to turn it down more and more. Thoughts become quieter and naturally less in number. There are a myriad of breathing techniques available these days. Probably just as many as there are meditation techniques! It’s kinda a self-care jungle out there! If want to explore a few techniques here are some that I recommend checking these on youtube: Straw breath Victory breath Alternate nostril breathing Humming Bee
#5 Learn from an expert One of my most used mottos in life is to protect my mind at all costs. I learned this wisdom from my meditation teacher, a master of meditation, Gurudev Sri Sri Ravi Shankar. I think anyone who has
witnessed someone losing their mind or seen what happens to the mind after a stroke or Alzheimers takes hold, would agree that your mind is one of the most precious things in life. We should do everything we can to save and protect our minds, including learning how to properly meditate from an expert. Why risk going into the jungle on your own? If you want to meditate like an expert, learn from an expert! We don’t seek to learn how to dance from a novice, nor a new language from someone who can only speak a few words. It makes sense when it comes to meditation, we also learn from someone who has been properly trained. Learning from a certified teacher sets you up for success so you can avoid any snakes in that proverbial jungle! A certified teacher knows precisely how to guide you through the learning process and any challenges you might encounter with a daily meditation practice. I can personally vouch for the meditation instructors that are trained through the Art of Living Foundation. The rigorous training to become certified instructors for these courses involves thousands of hours. If you want a mantra meditation technique, Sahaj Samadhi Meditation™ is by far the best of the best. For a breathing meditation technique, SKY Breath Meditation is phenomenal! I practice both of these meditation techniques every day without fail!
Bonus meditation tip from a master of meditation According to Gurudev, “Meditation happens with the attitude ‘I want nothing, I do nothing, I am nothing.’” What does each of these really mean? To say ‘I want nothing’ is to drop any desire for any experience, be it a deep meditation experience or thought-free meditation, or even a desire for something outside of meditation- at least for the time spent in meditation itself. After meditation desires are ok. To have the thought ‘I do nothing’ is to realize that meditation happens not from effort but from effortlessness. Gurudev says, “Meditation is the art of doing nothing and letting go.” And the one that often trips people up, ‘I am nothing’ means to drop any sense of I am somebody. I am a ‘good’ meditator. I am a ‘bad’ meditator. Just drop all the roles and identities we carry with us throughout the day.