Cheryl Magazine | Summer 2022

#GIRLPOWER

with Traci Henderson Smith

Strength to Live Authentically!

Photos by: Paul Stewart Photography and Marie Cochran

We approached #GirlPower differently this time. Introducing the Cochran family is a full-circle moment. When we first took Cheryl Magazine to print, I created #GirlPower with them in mind. The idea to present young visionaries, changemakers, icons, and leaders excelling in every field of endeavor placed Chef Simone, who you met in our first issue, and Jasmine and Nahla Cochran in the top two stories I wanted to cover. Each time I prepared to move forward with the Cochrans, I got the feeling, not yet. I didn’t know why until now. Still, and not to overlook the incredible talent of their equally remarkable brother, #NateTheGreat, but, you know, #GirlPower and all, I kept future Olympians #PrincessJasmine, 14-time AAU Track & Field All American, and #NahlaStar, 16-time AAU Track & Field All American and 5-time AAU National Champion in mind. I reached out to their mother, Marie, finally feeling that this summer issue would be a perfect time. “When I got the message to share about my daughters’ rise to greatness; I was hesitant to respond,” she told me. "I would have to say that it may not be the story you are looking for,” Marie continued. She thanked me for the opportunity and explained how that rise to greatness had evolved. That’s when I discovered a story I hope blesses you the way it blessed me, and one I felt only the mother could tell.

“In late November 2021, during a family trip, things changed abruptly. Jasmine (11) had been recovering from an injury for the past year, so we were focused on getting our youngest daughter, Nahla, to the cross-country championship a week away,” explains Marie. “During our trip, our 8-time junior Olympian, and 5-time national champion, wrote my husband and me a letter and said she did not want to run anymore. We weren’t surprised, and it wasn’t the first time she had mentioned it. What nine-year-old child running five to ten miles a day and putting grown men to shame with her strength and conditioning regimen wouldn’t complain from time to time? This time was different, though. There was nothing Nahla’s older siblings could bribe her with, and there was no amount of cheese pizza and brownies after her event that would inspire her.

I also noticed that Nahla didn’t want us to share her accolades with anyone during our stay in Orlando. She would say that it was ‘too much pressure.’ Too much pressure? I was confused. To witness Nahla run—she made it look effortless. Something was different. I coached her through

her thoughts and found that it wasn’t just a desire for more playtime. She was sharing her heart. My husband John and I are the parents of three children that are very well known in the track community for their skill, work ethic, and extensive achievements. For the past five years, we have traveled all over the nation, been published in magazines, featured on the news, and named our city’s future Olympians. We have had so much support, and we have been a source of inspiration for so many intentional parents. We were fully committed to the expectation of greatness. It was really hard not to keep pushing her.”

I could hear the desperation in a mother fighting the demon of public perception and the pressure of expectation. On the one hand, Nahla had parents, family members, the community, full support of her city, and fans across the nation that were all in and had been, from the start, pushing, supporting, cheering, and believing. She would be an Olympian, and she would be their Olympian, and they would all be waiting at the finish line. On the other hand, she was just a child—otherworldly-gifted, but a child. Marie needed to decide between a sure future in track & field and her child’s well-being and mental health. She chose the latter.

“I haven’t shared this publicly because I was afraid. I have seen the backlash that superstars like Simone Biles and Naomi Osaka have gotten for making decisions against expectations that got placed upon them. Nahla has a long way to go before she’s at that level, but as a mother, naturally, I want to protect her. I was afraid of what people would say about our daughter and her future. I was afraid of what they would speculate about our parenting. I was afraid of the rejection she may experience not living up to what others thought she should be. As I wrestled with these thoughts, I realized I was trying to protect our child from a fear of rejection that she hadn’t learned yet. I knew that our response to her request to stop running competitively would either train her to make it a priority to live up to the expectations of others or teach her, courageously, to be her authentic self. As tears run down my face sharing this, I realize I still struggle with feeling like I am enough as a woman, wife, mother, and entrepreneur and that those feelings stem from my childhood experiences. They are rooted in my parents’

approval or the lack thereof. I still get caught up in projects and missions, trying to prove to myself that I am enough. I still catch myself looking to fulfill expectations that others have of me. I knew that I was at a pivotal point in my child’s rearing and was one answer away from creating that same monster in my daughter. I couldn’t do it. I chose to fall back and allow her to show me how freedom from the bondage of expectations looked. Nahla is now freely living her best life. When asked why she is not running, I can see the expectations of others rise within her. I remind her that she is not the label of future Olympian or any of her championship titles. She is not the sum of what she does well or even what she no longer chooses to do. She is Nahla, #NahlaStar Cochran. She is a star no matter what.”

Nervously, Marie shared her daughter’s choice for self-care and disengagement from the thing most felt made her great, not knowing that the theme for our summer issue is self-care and its importance and that this story is what we needed. Girl power shows up in many forms, and at times it is in the

strength it takes to choose us over everyone. Thank you for this lesson Nahla. I wish I had had the guts to choose ME at your age. It would have made such a difference in my life.

Marie says Nahla still wakes up for 5 AM workouts a couple of times a week and outruns everyone around her. Periodically she speaks of running again, but who knows. Jasmine is recovering well from her injury, and it looks as if she may have taken a page from her sister’s book, as she has not yet decided whether or not to step back on the track. In the meantime, both girls have joined their local YMCA and are exploring swimming, soccer, and fitness. More importantly, they are exercising their right to discover all that they are without the pressure of outside expectations. They are defining themselves for themselves and declaring that they are far more than one thing done well. That’s #GirlPower if we’ve ever seen it. Jasmine and Nahla Cochran, Cheryl Magazine salutes you and wishes you all the best for the future!