Balanced Family Fall-Winter 2017

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BALANCED

FALL-WINTER ISSUE | 2017

FAMILY BALANCEDMAG.COM

HEALTH | WELLNESS | PARENTING | LIVING

FUN FACTORY The Children’s Museum of Cleveland aims to inspire creativity and learning – while encouraging play along the way – at its new home

INSIDE: WHY DO KIDS LIE? 6 | CHOOSING BRACES 14 | REDUCE STRESS 20 | FAMILY WORKOUTS 28


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INSIDE BALANCEDKIDS

Family Matters

4

MUSEUM MEMORIES

Michael C. Butz discusses taking childhood trips to Northeast Ohio’s museums and suggests a trip families can take today

Feature story

16

FUN FACTORY

The Children’s Museum of Cleveland aims to inspire creativity and learning – while encouraging play along the way – at its new home

On the cover: Cover photo and photo below by Michael C. Butz

16

6

NOT-SO PRETTY LITTLE LIES Kids lie because it’s reinforcing, interesting and they see it modeled as socially acceptable. How do you stop it?

10 COVER TO COVER

Encouraging children to read at a young age can result in benefits they’ll enjoy for the rest of their lives

14 ALL SMILES

Braces today are better and more efficient than they used to be, often resulting in a happier experience for children and parents

BALANCEDADULTS 20 STRESS IN THE CLE

Cleveland recently ranked as the third most-stressed city in the U.S.; local experts offer ways to root out the causes

24 CLOSE TO HOME

When selecting a home care provider for aging family members, there are many important factors to consider

BALANCEDBODY&MIND

26 USE IT OR LOSE IT

Staying fit can become more difficult as one ages, but consistency with diet and exercise can alleviate that shift

Lindsay and Scott Tucholka of Chagrin Falls hold their 3-year-old twins, Juliette and Reid, in front of the new Children’s Museum of Cleveland.

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IN SHAPE, 28 GETTING SHAPING FAMILY BONDS

Local fitness experts say working out together helps families bond and stay fit while providing other unique benefits FALL / WINTER 2017 | BALANCEDFAMILY | 3


BALANCED

FAMILYMATTERS FROM MICHAEL C. BUTZ

Museum memories S

ome of my earliest memories of visiting Cleveland from my hometown of Ravenna stem from school field trips to the city’s museums. In particular, I recall – and I’m certain I’m not alone here – visits to the Cleveland Museum of Natural History, where one of the highlights was always hanging out (and on) “Steggie,” Northeast Ohio’s favorite Stegosaurus, and trips to see all of the knights at Cleveland Museum of Art’s Jack, Joseph and Morton Mandel Armor Court. (Other early Cleveland memories involve trips to Municipal Stadium to watch the Indians of the ‘80s, who, to put it mildly, weren’t quite as successful as the team in recent years.) But I digress. Generations of Northeast Ohio children have visited those same museums – and many others. To say we’re fortunate to have the quality and variety of museums we have here in Northeast Ohio would be an understatement. One place I didn’t have the good fortune of visiting when I was younger was the Children’s Museum of Cleveland – perhaps because it was still in its infancy when I was at an age to visit. Recently, however, I attended a special family preview of the new Children’s Museum of Cleveland, and based on what I saw, I certainly hope kids today don’t miss out.

I say “new” because the museum had to move out of its former space in University Circle. In the process, it closed for about two years – though programming was maintained. It’s now set to reopen on Nov. 6 in the StagerBeckwith Mansion, a grand building on Euclid Avenue that once was part of Cleveland’s famed Millionaire’s Row. If the preview is any indication of what visitors can expect – and I fully believe it is – then the building won’t be the only “grand” thing about CMC 2.0. The highlights during my visit were Wonder Lab, a room in which kids can have fun (and maybe get wet) learning about various scientific principles, and Adventure City, the focal point of which is a super-sized playhouse that encourages children to interact and communicate – and dwarfs similar structures found at your neighborhood fast-food chain restaurant.

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You can read Alyssa Schmitt’s full report on the new Children’s Museum of Cleveland starting on Page 16. Also in this issue, we offer helpful advice on matters such as choosing braces for your children, how and why to prioritize exercising together as a family, and deciding what home health care options are right for aging family members. We also explore why Cleveland is considered one of the most stressed cities in the country, why children lie and why it’s harder to lose weight as we get older – and what we can do about it. Speaking of sleep, I suspect most children will need some following a visit to the Children’s Museum of Cleveland – a visit I encourage all families to explore making.

FAMILY Editor Michael C. Butz editor@balancedmag.com Senior Designer Stephen Valentine

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BALANCEDKIDS

Kids lie because it’s reinforcing, interesting and they see it modeled as socially acceptable. How do you stop it?

NOT-SO Pretty Little Lies By Amanda Koehn

T

he dog ate my homework.” “It was like that when I got here.” “My sister broke the vase.” “But Dad said I could do it.” Generations of parents have been on the receiving end of one or more of these fibs – or other falsehoods just like them. In many ways, it comes with the territory.

Children start lying “as soon as they can speak,” says Geoffrey Putt, a pediatric psychologist and parenting expert at Akron Children’s Hospital in Akron. While there are many forms of lies, omissions and myths kids can tell, the reasons behind them vary – as does what parents should do when it occurs.

WHY THEY LIE “It can be really confusing for some kids (to know) what is a lie and what’s not a lie,” says Putt, explaining that uncertainty can be a result of what they are taught. For example, some families will reflect positively on little white lies, which seem harmless and avoid hurting another’s feelings, but the distinction can be confusing for children. Understanding the difference between right and wrong develops as children get older. Telling a lie evolves into a concrete choice rather than a misunderstanding, with

6 | BALANCEDFAMILY | FALL / WINTER 2017

Berk

Putt

reasons for these deceptions ranging from fantasy or seeking attention to attempting to get out of trouble – with many other possibilities in between. For example, sometimes children will lie to appear more socially desirable – saying they have a new toy or electronic gadget that they don’t – to keep up with what their friends have. Moreover, pre-teens and teenagers will sometimes take to the internet to exaggerate the truth or lie, often for the attention they receive from made-up stories, says Jay Berk, a psychologist specializing in children, adolescents and families at Jay Berk PhD and Associates in Beachwood. “I think with a lot of lies for teenagers, it has to do with lying online because no one knows if they are telling the truth,” he says.

WHAT IT MEANS “Don’t get upset at the lie, it’s the meaning of the lie,” says Berk, adding there are several reasons behind lies that could indicate where the child is coming from.

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First, if kids repeatedly lie about why they did poorly on school assignments or are falling behind in class, it may indicate anxiety or embarrassment behind an undiagnosed learning disability, Berk says. Putt and Berk both say kids who have Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder may lie when confronted as an immediate impulse to cover up something they did, which may also be the result of acting on an inappropriate impulse. Moreover, lying – and the act of getting away with it – can be reinforcing. It may give the kid attention they otherwise wouldn’t receive or allow them to not be disturbed. Putt pointed to the example of asking a young child whether he or she has to go to the bathroom, and the response is “no” even if it’s really “yes.” He says such a response often results from the child not wanting to stop playing or doing whatever they are doing. “If they can delay you even just a moment, they win,” he says. Putt also says while all kids lie, those who are more intelligent may become better at it. They anticipate questions one may ask to catch them in a lie and learn to respond, and choose to lie about things they know others cannot verify. “(They are) constantly figuring out (how) to tailor the lying to make it more sophisticated,” he says.

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Telling a lie evolves into a concrete choice rather than a misunderstanding, with reasons for these deceptions ranging from fantasy or seeking attention to attempting to get out of trouble – with many other possibilities in between. “If it’s a pattern and the pattern is growing, that’s a concern,” he says. Berk says his practice has therapy groups for children and young adults, alternative education programs for children struggling with school, and a program for electronic gaming addiction that can help address different types of lies if they are serious enough or coexist with a psychological problem. On the other hand, it’s likely not a serious issue if a child tells the occasional lie because they don’t want to own up to a bad behavior, or if a young child is experimenting with reality versus fantasy, Berk and Putt both say. One way to teach children to not lie at home, Putt says, is to confront them about a known lie but to not give away how it was discovered the child was being untruthful, thus giving them an opportunity to tell the truth. In the process, the parent can study the child’s physical tells of lying, and the child is instilled with the sense that parents always know the truth, even if sometimes they don’t. Then, the next time the parent thinks the child may be lying but isn’t sure and confronts him or her about it, the child may be more likely to tell the truth because the reinforcement associated with getting away with a lie will no longer be expected. “Because if every time you do know the answer, one time if you actually don’t know, it will work,” Putt says. “And you can see their tells – they look down, their voice gets higher.” Parents also can give children a stronger punishment when they behave badly and lie about it, and give little or no punishment if they behave badly but tell the truth – which instead reinforces truth. Additionally, it’s important to acknowledge that in many cases, lying is accepted by society – people lie, or at least exaggerate the truth, on résumés, when selling things – and kids learn to model that behavior. Putt says that’s a factor in why kids lie and believe they can get away with it. “You might watch a parent who gets something not scanned in a grocery store and takes it home and is like ‘I got this for free,’” he says. “And the kid is like, ‘OK’ – that’s modeling of lying.’” BF

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BALANCEDKIDS

o t r e Cov er ov c P By Alyssa Schmitt

Encouraging children to read at a young age can result in benefits they’ll enjoy for the rest of their lives

arents know reading is an essential skill for their child to develop, but with distractions like television, it’s not always the simplest task to encourage – but it’s worth the energy.

Reading at home doesn’t just help children in school, it helps them understand the world around them. “(It builds) empathy, curiosity and a loving family dynamic,” says Harriett Logan, owner of Loganberry Books in Shaker Heights. “If you raise a child in a reading family to become a reader, you’ve also established a secure foundation of family psychology and happiness – a rooted growth factor that learning is good.” Each book can serve as its own vessel of escapism, Logan adds. A child can have a disastrous childhood but books provide a level of empathy they might not be exposed to while also increasing the child’s desire to learn. Pam Jankowski, director of literacy and learning at the Cuyahoga County Public Library, says reading can open doors to ideas and topics the child was not aware of previously. “Reading stories can introduce a child to a different culture,” she says. “It also builds in children new concepts or areas that they may have never been introduced to or might never have a chance to experience.”

10 | BALANCEDFAMILY | FALL / WINTER 2017

She encourages parents to take their children to the library to gain these new cultural experiences. It familiarizes children with the library while planting the seed of their interest in books that will grow for a lifetime.

Books to check out The Cuyahoga County Public Library suggests books to read for kids of different ages.

Age 4: “Plant the Tiny Seed” by Christie Matheson Age 5: “The Friend Ship” by Kat Yeh; illustrated by Chuck Groenink Age 6: “Narwhal: Unicorn of the Sea” by Ben Clanton Age 7: “I Am a Story” by Dan Yaccarino Age 8: “The Legend of Rock Paper Scissors” by Drew Daywalt; illustrated by Adam Rex Age 9: “When the Sea Turned to Silver” by Grace Lin Age 10: “Invisible Emmie” by Terri Libenson Age 11: “Posted” by John David Anderson balancedmag.com


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“For me, one of the primary benefits to a child using the library is it instills in them a love of lifelong learning,” Jankowski says. “They develop a relationship with the library ... and they will continue to use the library as they get older.” One mistake parents make Jankowski when encouraging their children to read is not allowing the child to read a book for a second time, Jankowski says. The child is already familiar with the content and may understand the book in a different way than in the first read-through. Even though there are many distractions competing for a child’s attention, Jankowski says children’s interest in reading has not declined Logan – it’s transformed. “Children are reading more online,” she says. “Research is demonstrating that reading is still important to kids.” More children are downloading their books on electronic reading tablets, but Jankowski says children still prefer

print books. No matter what form the book takes, she urges parents to continue interacting with children through reading. “Parents who are trying to encourage their children to read (should) read together and read aloud,” she says. “There’s an enjoyment a child has when they can share a book with their caretaker, so having that opportunity to share and read that book out loud together is a good way to instill a love of books in a child.” To find the right books, Logan says not to worry about reading level and instead pick something in which the child is interested. “Any book is a good book,” she says. “Find something that is interesting to the child. Don’t fret about reading level because you can err in both directions – but you can never err if the child is happily reading a book.” She adds that making a child read at a level higher than he or she is able to can frustrate the child and make him or her stop reading altogether. For those more reluctant readers, both Logan and Jankowski mention introducing them to graphic novels, which feature a mix of pictures and text. “I would recommend graphic novels to balance the pictorial story with the written story,” Logan says. “It’s an easier edge to get into and is every bit as valuable as a reading experience.” BF

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BALANCEDKIDS

Braces today are better and more efficient than they used to be, often resulting in a happier experience for children and parents By Ed Carroll

G

etting braces is often considered a rite of passage for many teenagers; nothing says “awkward adolescent” like a mouth full of metal. But the process for getting braces has changed a bit in the years since most parents probably had them, so moms and dads should know their children aren’t necessarily doomed to the same painful fate they might have had during their high school days.

Dr. Phillip Bomeli of Solon Orthodontists in Solon says both parents and children need to be comfortable with the child’s orthodontist. “Every atmosphere may not be comfortable to every person,” he says. “At my office, I like people and I treat everyone like it would be their own family members. We keep it lighthearted, (and) it occasionally gets loud, but maybe there are people that are quieter and they might not be as comfortable with me.” Dr. Shira Z. Tor of Weiss and Tor Orthodontics in Orange Village and Middleburg Heights says it’s important parents find an actual orthodontist – someone who has gone to school for the extra years and taken written and oral board exams, making them board certified – for braces work. “Make sure you are going to an orthodontist,” she says. “There are general dentists who do orthodontics but they’re not an orthodontist specialist.” Both Tor and Bomeli agreed it was important to include children in the decision-making process when finding an orthodontist and getting braces, at least to an extent.

14 | BALANCEDFAMILY | FALL / WINTER 2017

Bomeli

Tor

“Well, sure, I think the parents ultimately know, to an extent of course, that at the end of the day, (kids are) part of the decision,” Bomeli says. “There’s the thing where they’re minors and trust me, mom, dad, that you’re going to be much happier we got this done now as opposed to later … but there’s no use ‘torturing a kid’ (with braces). If that’s the case, it’s not going be a fun situation for anyone.” Tor agrees children need to be on board with the decision. “Children need to be motivated because (braces do) take compliance,” she says. “Children need to make sure teeth stay clean and take part in the treatment, so (children) should feel comfortable with the orthodontist they’re choosing.” Still, children today aren’t wearing their father’s braces. Gone are the days when teenagers would need to come in to the orthodontist’s office every month to have the braces tightened. “(Braces are) more efficient and more comfortable for children (today),” Bomeli says. “There still might be soreness, especially the first one to three days, but it gets a lot better quickly. These wires (used today) are flexible and they keep working. So, instead of seeing a patient every four weeks on the nose, seeing them every six to eight weeks is perfectly fine.” Tor also says technology has changed things for the better. “The tech is different,” she says. “We have ways of making things go faster and a lot more comfortable, children can have

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Invisalign, and a lot of parents don’t think that’s an option (for teenagers). It’s not the same type of treatment they had when they were younger.” But Bomeli says Invisalign, which is a transparent alternative to braces, is a tool that’s still evolving and typically isn’t used for children. “It can’t treat everything,” he says. “There are certain things it does very well but not everything.” Tor warns that one of the biggest problems parents and teenagers need to avoid is a recent trend of self-help dental solutions. “The biggest thing right now is there are a lot of (do-ityourself) things that can be very dangerous,” she says. “Things like (non-dental) rubber bands on teeth to help close spaces can actually lead to teeth loss, so make sure you’re going to someone who is trained as an orthodontist.” But Bomeli says he mostly hears about how much better it is for teenagers getting braces now compared to when their parents got them. “The overriding thing that I hear most parents say is, ‘You guys have it easy compared to where it was when I was your age,’” he says. BF

th e l a u n c hho use

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Bash SAVE THE DATE Join us for strolling dinner and dancing in celebration of entrepreneurship. The evening showcases our region’s promising startups and supports LaunchHouse’s mission of establishing Northeast Ohio as an entrepreneurial leader. Proceeds from the Bootstrap Bash will assist LaunchHouse in continuing to provide much of its educational programs and services to the entrepreneurial community for free.

When

Saturday, January 20, 2018 7:30 pm

Where

Red Space

Visionary Entrepreneur Award Honoree Steve Potash Founder, President & CEO, OverDrive Inc.

For tips on how to talk with your parents on aging-related issues visit 4070talk.com

Nancy is happy to be helping local seniors

Caregiver guide: caregiverstress.com homeinstead.com/116

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FALL / WINTER 2017 | BALANCEdfamily | 15


Lindsay and Scott Tucholka of Chagrin Falls watch as their 3-year-old twins, Juliette and Reid, play on a wooden car in the Children Museum of Cleveland’s Adventure City.

FUN FACTORY The Children’s Museum of Cleveland aims to inspire creativity and learning – while encouraging play along the way – at its new home Story by Alyssa Schmitt • Photography by Michael C. Butz

A

s Lindsay and Scott Tucholka’s 3-year-old twins, Juliette and Reid, eagerly explored all that the new Children’s Museum of Cleveland has to offer, mom couldn’t help but notice the many ways in which the museum’s activities and exhibitions inspire learning without her children necessarily realizing it.

16 | BALANCEDFAMILY | FALL / WINTER 2017

She pointed to the wooden cashier station at the museum’s faux open-air farmer’s market, complete with plastic vegetables, that Juliette used to make change with pretend money in Adventure City and inviting interactive blackboard in the museum’s Wonder Lab. “I think, especially at this age, when you talk about school, they’re already like, ‘That means sitting and being quiet and paying attention,’” says Lindsay Tucholka, whose family lives in Chagrin Falls. “So, this interactive learning – when they don’t really know that it’s happening – is great. ... (Juliette) doesn’t know she was practicing her counting, or when she was

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painting on the blackboard with the water, she was practicing her letters. That’s fantastic she was doing that, but she was playing.” The Tucholkas toured the Children’s Museum of Cleveland’s exhibits during the museum’s family preview day and compared it favorably to museums like COSI Columbus, which is more than a two-hour drive for the family, as well as the former Children’s Museum of Cleveland. “This is a lot more updated and has a lot more interactive features,” Scott Tucholka says. “What I like about it is there’s all these different things, there’s not just one or two items (with which to play.)” Undoubtedly, this kind of feedback is music to the ears of Children’s Museum of Cleveland stakeholders, who, following a nearly two-year hiatus, are set to celebrate the museum’s grand reopening Nov. 6 at the remodeled Stager-Beckwith Mansion – the museum’s stately new home at 3813 Euclid Ave. in Cleveland. The revived Millionaire’s Row-era mansion marks the first permanent home for the museum since it was established in 1981. The unique setting allows remnants of Cleveland’s vibrant past collide with its budding future. “When I first pulled up, the building looked like a doll house or a castle, so I think it would pique a child’s imagination as soon as they saw the building,” says Maria Campenelli, Children’s Museum of Cleveland executive director. “It’s such a unique building.”

Looking back The Children’s Museum of Cleveland temporarily closed

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its doors in January 2016. At the time, University Circle Inc., which owned the museum’s previous location, decided not to renew the museum’s lease because it was closing a deal that led to the now-underconstruction One University Circle apartment tower. Campenelli says it wasn’t a surprise when the museum’s lease wasn’t renewed. Instead, she considers it a blessing in disguise. “The Cleveland Foundation funded a study (of the museum), and we benchmarked against 10 cities similar in size,” she says. “What we saw is that for a city the size of Cleveland, our museum needed to be much larger, actually four times the size of what we were. “In hindsight, I think it’s one of the best things to happen to the Children’s Museum because it forced us, as an organization, to think about what was going to happen next.” After looking at more than 20 locations in Cleveland, the museum found in the StagerBeckwith Mansion a site that was exactly four times as big as its former home. In addition,

Top: The Children Museum of Cleveland’s new home is at the Stager-Beckwith Mansion on Euclid Avenue in Cleveland. Above: Juliette Tucholka counts back change to her mom, Lindsay, at the museum’s farmer’s market.

the museum gained three times as much parking space. The increase in space posed some challenges, too. “All of our exhibits from our prior museum were either sold or donated, so it’s all brandnew exhibits,” she says. “If you think about it, we were in a 10,000-square-foot facility and

now we’re in a 40,000-squarefoot facility, with double the ceiling height. All the exhibits are custom made, so it didn’t really make sense to move anything we had.”

Looking ahead Following a survey of the museum’s customers, the

FALL / WINTER 2017 | BALANCEdfamily | 17


Top: Twenty-two-month-old Jack Levy plays in the Children’s Museum of Cleveland’s Wonder Lab. Jack was with his mother, Filiz, of Copley, and aunt, Alex Aydin, of Akron. Above: Sixteen-month-old Charlotte Poor crawls through a tube in Adventure City as her mom, Meryl, of Westlake, looks on.

institution found there were three features customers loved: the grocery store, the climber and the water table. Each of those concepts were reimagined for the new museum. The grocery store and climber were incorporated into Adventure City, which

was greeted by oohs and ahhs from adults during the museum’s family preview day – while kids immediately began exploring the structure, which is in what was once the mansion’s ballroom. In the sections of the giant jungle gym-like structure that make up the city, kids can build

18 | BALANCEdfamily | FALL / WINTER 2017

cars, collect their harvest from a rooftop garden, sell their goods at an open-air market, and climb in and out of nooks and crannies scattered through the complex. The former museum’s single water table takes on a new form in the Wonder Lab, where kids can get their hands wet while learning. Children can build tracks to carry colorful plastic balls through courses of rushing water, or they can toss the balls into vortexes and shooting streams – then watch where on the two water tables they end up. Occupying one of the lab’s walls is a “scarf shooter” that sucks fabric squares through pneumatic tubes, like those used at bank drive-thrus, before popping them out overhead in a way that allows children to catch them as they drift back down to the floor. On the opposite wall are utility sinks, where kids can play with measuring cups and other kitchen utensils. Kids can also draw on a board just by using water and a paint brush or create a vertical track with magnetic pieces. Those curious about what the Stager-Beckwith Mansion looked like when it was built in 1866 need only to travel to the museum’s top floor to

see the Making Miniatures exhibit, which has a variety of dollhouses – including one of the mansion – with pint-sized objects and tiny rooms. Next to the cafe, where families can bring in food from local restaurants or their own snacks, is Arts & Parts, a room filled with crafts to inspire creativity. Campenelli says the museum is about $1 million away from its capital campaign goal. Once the museum has reached its goal, new exhibits – like the Meadow Room, an indoor meadow for toddlers to run around freely; the Music Room, where kids can experiment with a variety of instruments and sounds; and the Theatre Room, which may host some children’s introduction to acting – will open. While her son, Reid, climbed on top of a race track for small PVC-pipe cars and her daughter, Juliette, pretended to hammer away on a wall on the other side of the “construction” play area, Lindsay Tucholka noted the ease of keeping an eye on her children at the museum. She appreciates that the mix of exhibitions, all of which are designed for children up to 12 years old, are modern and accessible while in a setting that evokes a historic sense of “old Cleveland.” “I think it’s going to be another draw to Cleveland for families,” she says. “We need more things that will bring people to Cleveland. This is close to the Heights (Cleveland Heights, Shaker Heights and University Heights), where there are a lot of young families. ... I think people are just chomping for when this place opens. I mean, like, dying for it.” BF

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BALANCEDADULTS

stress in the CLE Cleveland recently ranked as the third most-stressed city in the U.S.; local experts offer ways to root out the causes By Alyssa Schmitt

I

t’s natural for stress to loom over people, helping them become more active and alert during daily activities. A problem arises, however, when individuals experience high levels of stress – otherwise known as chronic – leading them to become vulnerable to damaging effects.

A recent study by WalletHub analyzed 150 cities across 30 key metrics, like hours worked each week, job security, divorce rate and health, to rank which cities have the highest stress levels. Cleveland ranked third on the list behind only Newark, N.J., and Detroit. The first step to alleviating potentially harmful stress as recommended by Jeffrey Janata, division chief of psychology at University Hospitals Cleveland Medical Center and psychiatry professor at Case Western Reserve University School of Medicine, is to identify where it’s coming from. Otherwise, the stress will not be resolved. The WalletHub study showed that, in general, stress came from money, which was first on the list of causes of stress, followed by health and safety, family relationships and work. Janata noted that one person’s stress is not always the same as someone else’s, meaning there are different solutions for each individual.

20 | BALANCEDFAMILY | FALL / WINTER 2017

FINANCIAL STRESS

Janata says financial stress can occur when someone feels like they are “losing control” – and that such a feeling can overcome someone in an instant, or in other cases, feel like an unending cycle. Janata recommends patients of his with financial stress visit a financial planner to “establish the nature of the stress.” “That’s where the unique circumstances come in,” he says. “For some people, it’s that they aren’t making as much money, lost a job, (or are) out of the work force because of illness or injury.” Dr. Joseph Baskin, a staff psychiatrist at Cleveland Clinic’s Lutheran Hospital in Cleveland, says if there is a sudden change in finances, it’s imperative to reassess one’s spending. “Financial issues are not always easy for people,” he says. “I would say that if a person is under financial stress, there’s free debt-relief counseling to help them learn to manage their funds. To the best of their ability, people need to live within their means”

Baskin

Janata

Finding a strategy designed for an individual’s specific needs will allow them to feel a greater sense of control – potentially alleviating the stress altogether.

WORK STRESS Work stress can become apparent when a worker no longer feels like he or she has established control over their time or the work they do – and can increase when workers are asked to do more for the same pay and in the same amount of time. “Some jobs have a lot of built in stress,” Baskin says. “Separate the factors that you can control from the ones you cannot. … (You) can’t change the work but you can change the reaction to the work.” Baskin added that planning timely vacations, down time and exercising can help ease work-related stress. A different strategy to deal with work stress proposed by Janata involves communicating with co-workers who have learned how to handle their stress. While their stresses may not be the same, ideas

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can come from their coping strategies and can provide alternative mechanisms for the individual. “Encourage people to join with groups who have the same situation to find strategies that helped them,” he says. “It’s sharing ideas, but also, they feel as if they have a similar situation – and there’s a sense of empathy that comes with that communication.”

loved one. Baskin recommended people share the burden. “Fix the issues you can fix or share the load with others,” he says. Both say open communication is a key factor in solving family stress, but that doesn’t mean to force a family trip. “Some will plan a family outing and (think) that will solve the problem – not true,” Janata says.

Family stress

Health and safety stress

When parents start yelling and there’s more push back from children, the family balance could be off kilter. “Those are warning signs that there is unexpressed stress the family is experiencing,” Janata says. “Again, it’s very hard to solve a problem if it’s not defined. Let’s just all sit down around the dinner table and talk about what’s going on in our lives and see how and why things are changing.” Stress can come out in the home for a number of reasons, like school stress, work stress or having to take care of a sick

Factors that influence health- and safety-related stress vary widely, from dealing with chronic illness, crime rates in one’s city or neighborhood, and an overall discomfort in the current state of the world. To address these stresses, Janata and Baskin reiterate that the origins must be identified. When it comes to health, Baskin says to take care of yourself first and get help understanding the stressors as soon as it’s needed, whether the stress comes from mental health, trauma or chronic illness. “Bottom line is, if you try to go it alone,

it’s going to be difficult,” he says. If an individual does not feel safe, it might be time to identify what safety means to that person. “It’s important to work through a sense of safety – whatever that means (to a person),” Janata says. “If it feels as though there is unsafe behavior or the environment is unsafe, then there are ways to address that.” If an individual’s definition of safety has changed, then consider how to change their environment to fit that definition. It could be as simple as using a different route through town or it could mean moving to a new neighborhood. For children dealing with safety stress, it’s the parents’ responsibility to talk more about what fears the child is experiencing. “Parents of young children have an obligation to communicate carefully with their children (about) the things they are worried about,” Janata says. “It’s important to talk about their fears and talk about their worries, and as parents, to create a home environment that is safe.” BF

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BALANCEDADULTS

Close to home

When selecting a home care provider for aging family members, there are many important factors to consider

By Ed Carroll

F

or adults with aging parents, the decision to have a home health care provider assist the parent can be a difficult one. But after deciding to get a senior some help, the next question can be just as difficult: How does one decide which home health care provider is right? Experts at Home Instead Senior Care and Comfort Keepers provide their insight into what can be a difficult decision. Paul Burke, owner of Comfort Keepers in Beachwood, says the first thing people need to ask themselves is whether they want to go with an agency or a private caregiver for their parents. He says with a private caregiver, there’s really only one perceived advantage: cost. “You’re going to bring a stranger into your house – how do you know that stranger is credentialed?” Burke asks. “There’s no standard for Ohio in-home care, no licensure required. What type of training have (the private caregivers) had? Do they have to do continuing education? That’s not a requirement by the state in our industry. Is the person qualified? Is the person vetted? How safe is this person? We do a six-point background check (for prospective

24 | BALANCEDFAMILY | FALL / WINTER 2017

Comfort Keepers caregivers), including an FBI check, and (they’re) fingerprinted. You don’t get that if you hire a private caregiver.” Burke also says the cost advantages of a private caregiver are overstated. “If you hire a private caregiver, you have to take (out a) worker’s comp (policy), you have to get private insurance,” Burke says. “What happens if (a private caregiver) hurts themselves? What happens if they steal something? There’s no recourse for you. If you’re paying them above board, you now have employer taxes as well, and only one person on your team; what happens if they’re sick or have car problems? Your parent won’t get care for the day. If you’re making that decision (of) agency versus private, you might think you’re going to save a few dollars by going private, but is it worth this exposure?” Jeannie Radcliff, vice president and co-owner of Home Instead Senior Care, says one of the first questions an adult should ask a company is how long they’ve been in business, among other questions. “How many caregivers do they actually have on staff?” Radcliff says. “What’s (their) turnover percentage, how many of (their) caregivers have been with (them) five years or longer?” Continuing training is another important thing to look for in a home health care provider, she says. “What kind of training programs are (they) offering the caregivers and how can (they) help them improve?” she says. “There’s a number of things caregivers need training on.”

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Radcliff says communication between family members is also key – something she’s learned firsthand as the daughter of someone with Alzheimer’s disease. “I’ve found what matters to me is communication,” she says. “Everyone will have a problem, but what is their way of communicating Burke (the problem) with family members and sharing their concerns? For a lot of (adult children), they’ll say the most important thing for them is ‘mom’s safety,’ but for that senior, safety might not be their top criteria. Everyone has different things that matter to them, but they should be able to articulate that clearly. We’ve found communication is key, and you should be able to talk to someone (with the health care provider) at night.” Radcliff also says, provided the parent does not have dementia, it’s important to consider their wishes when making the decision. Burke agrees, and says they’ve run into situations in which the children set up home care for their parents only to find out later the parents canceled the services. “You need to have an open dialogue and a conversation (with the senior) when bringing in outside help, and it’s better to position it as ‘outside help’ and not just as a ‘caregiver,’” Burke says. “The whole idea is to keep people in their home as long as possible, because that’s the best place to be. People want to remain in their homes, age in place and have the same standard of quality of living as in the past.” BF

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BALANCEDBODY&MIND

Use it o r lose it By Am

anda

Koehn

Staying fit can become more difficult as one ages, but consistency with diet and exercise can alleviate that shift

I

t’s an upsetting reality that as one ages, work tends to become more high-pressure, raising children takes its toll and it’s harder to find time to sleep.

In addition, those life changes, as well as physical changes that come with age, can make it more difficult to stay in shape. Not only might you be working harder and wishing you had more free time than ever before, but taking extra effort to work out and eat healthy becomes more vital. However, local fitness authorities Meghan Foore, manager of Titans Gym’s Twinsburg and Streetsboro locations, and Kate Toohig, fitness, wellness and recreation director at the Mandel Jewish Community Center in Beachwood, say consistency with exercise and diet, modifying workouts to suit age and changing small daily habits could help people stay fit as they age.

PHYSICAL AGE MAKES FITNESS HARDER Many factors contribute to why it can be difficult to stay in shape as one gets older. Specifically, changes in metabolism, muscle and hormones play a role, as do increased rates of injuries. “A lot of times, our metabolism slows down as we get older, so essentially when that happens it is harder to lose weight,” Toohig says. Such trends often begin between ages 30 and 40, however, it’s different for everyone – some with good fortune will never

26 | BALANCEDFAMILY | FALL / WINTER 2017

experience a dramatic shift. Moreover, because muscles burn calories at a higher rate than fat, as muscle mass decreases, it’s more difficult to burn off what you eat. Also, since older people have more sensitive bones and joints, certain exercises can become more difficult, Foore says. Appetite increases brought on by hormone changes also can occur, which is especially pronounced for women. “Everything in your body is constantly changing the older you get,” Foore says. “That’s where self-control kicks in.”

BAD HABITS DON’T HELP FITNESS, EITHER Toohig says it’s important to consider lifestyle changes that aren’t a direct result of aging but reflective of habits shifting once one has kids, demanding roles at work or other changes in life that contribute to busyness. For instance, a “hunger hormone,” ghrelin, makes people feel hungry when they are just tired. Essentially, one’s body is trying to create energy via food, rather than what one really needs – sleep. Stress can also play a role, as can small, almost unnoticeable habits. Toohig pointed to parents who eat any food their child does not finish. They barely notice it, but doing so can sometimes add an entire meal to one’s day. It’s also another habit that might affect women more significantly, as they tend to do more of the meal planning in some families. “I’ve helped a lot of women who never realized they did that,” Toohig says. Foore says fixating on weight alone is not helpful. People gain weight for many reasons, including building muscle, and weight gain isn’t a good way to measure fitness.

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“Honestly, I don’t think the scale matters at all,” she says, adding that maintaining a good fat-tomuscle ratio is what’s important. “I don’t have one in my household – I haven’t had one since I was a teenager.”

Foore

Toohig

CONSISTENCY, MUSCLE WORK AND MEALS ARE KEY While such bodily changes can seem compulsory and thus demotivating, Foore says if people pay attention to diet and continue fitness trends – hopefully set at earlier ages – they will typically stay in shape. “My personal opinion is it doesn’t matter what age you are, as long as you are putting forth the work and diet properly, your body

will respond,” she says. Foore adds that while young people can often endure high-intensity, cardio-heavy workouts, as people notice their bodies changing, focusing on muscle maintenance is important for burning appropriate calories and maintaining health. She recommends shifting elliptical workouts to slower

movements with higher resistance to build muscle. On treadmills, she recommends “power walking” at between 3 to 4 mph and at 5 to 10 percent incline without holding on to the machine, which can cause people to lean back and take away the resistance built by the incline. Exercising daily, even if it’s just a long walk, is a good habit to start, Toohig says. Diet is more important, however, as experts tend to agree that diet is responsible for about 80 percent of maintaining weight, while exercise accounts for about 20 percent. Toohig says simply eating meals is important for maintaining metabolism. “Your body is kind of like a fire,” she says. “If you don’t eat the fire goes out, and the fire is your metabolism,” adding that some people prefer to eat six small meals per day, others the traditional three – it all works. In general, though, consistency with eating healthy and exercising at a younger age sets a precedent for aging well. “This generation coming up, you are going to see a lot more fitness and health in older individuals, because they are getting into it much younger,” Foore says. “The more consistent you are, the better your body is going to stay the way it is.” BF

Advertorial

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relationships. Relationships require communication — the exchange of information and ideas between people — to be successful. Hearing loss breaks that connection. The divorce rate among the hearing impaired is four times higher than the general population. A study of more than 1,000 people over age 40 with hearing loss shows how hearing issues can damage relationships. More than 33 percent of respondents admitted that misunderstandings from not hearing properly contributed significantly to arguments with family members. Nearly two-thirds

confessed to pretending to understand spoken dialogue and then floundering their way through conversations. Hearing loss can add stress to relationships, resulting in feelings of failure, anxiety, separation and overall poor health. Stay connected to your loved ones and avoid the

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FALL / WINTER 2017 | BALANCEDFAMILY | 27


BALANCEDBODY&MIND

Getting in shape, shaping family bonds By Amanda Koehn

Local fitness experts say working out together helps families bond and stay fit while providing other unique benefits

W

hile there are many excuses for not exercising, perhaps the most frequently cited is that one simply doesn’t have time. Especially for parents, taking time out of the day to work out – time that could be spent with family, working or even sleeping – can feel like a chore. However, making exercise a family activity that gets the whole crew outside or to the gym can be an effective way to combine spending time together and taking care of everyone’s health.

THE BENEFITS Ed King, owner of Kings Gym in Bedford Heights, says one of the benefits to working out as a family is it motivates everyone. “It’s a lot harder to train by yourself than when you are with somebody,” he says. “(It’s) also just having a common fitness bond, it helps everybody stay on task (and) it’s more consistent.” Moreover, families can use working out as a way to spend quality time together that gets children away from screens, which is good not only physically, but mentally, King says. Plus, children whose parents exercise regularly and involve them in it set an example that taking care of your health is important. “It’s kind of contagious,” he says. “If fitness is a part of your life, the odds of it trickling down to your kids are higher.”

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King

Papa

Parents might experience the reverse. Donna Papa, owner and chief instructor at ATA Cleveland Martial Arts’ Solon gym, says she initially started with martial arts after seeing her son, who was then 4, take classes. She’s now been doing it for 20 years and is a fifth-degree black belt. Taking martial arts gave Papa a better understanding of what her son was trying to learn, while before, she sometimes saw her son struggling with a skill and couldn’t understand why. “Then I started, and it gave me such an appreciation of what children actually do accomplish,” she says. “It really gave me a better understanding and more appreciation for the art, doing it myself.”

GETTING THE FAMILY OUTSIDE While a gym or class is likely the best bet in the winter, outdoor activities are a way families can forget they are exercising while simply enjoying the weather and exploring local attractions.

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King advises families hike or bike at one of the 18 Cleveland Metroparks. “(They have) all kinds of biking paths and skill levels, and it’s safe because it’s not on the roads,” he says, adding that during the summer months, kayaking is also a fun, light exercise. Papa also says parents can help kids practice sports together, which gets them both active and learning skills. “I think it keeps families closer together because they are doing something together,” she says. Regardless of where the exercise takes place, King says it’s important to schedule time to do it rather than just trying to fit it in whenever everybody has time, as there will never be a perfect moment. Also, it’s important to choose activities everyone agrees on, and if family members have different preferences, to take turns choosing. Switching up workouts also keeps it interesting and provides a chance to work different muscles. “Anything you do as a family, there is a bonding component that goes along with it,” he says.

HIT THE GYM King’s gym, which he runs with his brother, Frank King, offers boot camp-style classes in which families go through different types of exercises all during a single high-intensity class. He says he often sees families having fun and holding themselves accountable for their fitness in the process.

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If fitness is a part of your life, the odds of it trickling down to your kids are higher.

Ed King Kings Gym “It’s fun for them because they tease each other throughout,” he says. Papa often sees parents starting classes after their kids have already been doing martial arts, just as she did. The gym also offers classes in which kids and parents can train together. All students test from belt to belt, thus it’s easy for family members to have common goals. “Plus, they can take it home and practice together,” she says, adding they also go to tournaments together and can make a day of it. Papa says while the gym’s goals for children involve building self-confidence and mastering skills, parents also often get a self-confidence boost once they begin training. “Our main goal with the children is them learning how to focus and pay attention, plus we really work on building their self-confidence” she says. “And that also helps with the adults, because they walk in and are nervous about doing something new like this … and then they get better and feel good about themselves.” BF

FALL / WINTER 2017 | BALANCEDFAMILY | 29


WELLNESSDIRECTORY HOME & HEALTH BRIGITTE AT YOUR SERVICE

We are committed to quality care. We provide personal care, meal preparation, transportation to appointments and shopping, laundry, light housekeeping and so much more. All shifts available; we are screened, bonded and insured. References available. 216-297-0800 brigitteatyourservice.com

CHAGRIN VALLEY SPEECH THERAPY SERVICES LLC

A pediatric speech therapy private practice located in Chagrin Falls, Ohio. Melissa Baker M.S. CCC-SLP has nearly 20 years of experience working with children in both private and public school settings. Her speciality is the assessment and treatment of children with autism. Melissa Baker M.S. CCC-SLP Owner/Speech-Language Pathologist Chagrin Valley Speech Therapy Services 440-972-3670 chagrinvalleyspeech@gmail.com chagrinvalleyspeech.com

OBVIOUS COFFEE COMPANY

is a local micro-roaster specializing in single origin coffee beans. We roast to order and ship directly to your door. Visit our website at www.obviouscoffee.com to shop online and see where you can find us, and our products, in person.

OPTIONS FOR SENIOR AMERICA

Serving Cuyahoga and surrounding counties for over 20 years. We offer quality home care customized to your needs. Our qualified, screened and motivated STNAs, RNs, LPNs and companions are available for live-in or hourly work. First interview is free. Our aides provide exceptional customer service. They are fully bonded and insured including Workers Comp and Professional Liability. 216-861-3700 optionscorp.com

Wellness directory is provided by our advertising partners. To be included in future issues email adsales@cjn.org.

SENIOR SOLUTIONS LLC

When your loved one has a need, we have a solution. Round the clock care, 365 days/year, provided by skilled, compassionate, caregivers. Care planning including residential options, home safety assessments. Coordination with medical providers to insure proper care. Companion care and/or transportation. Flexible scheduling and affordable prices. Jamie Berns 216-925-3042 seniorsolutions11@gmail.com

THE NANNY CONNECTION

is your personal connection to professional childcare. Well-known and respected throughout Northeast Ohio for 12 years, we will guide you through your search for safe, quality nannies and babysitters for your family. Sick child? After school care? Summer Nanny? Date Night? We can help! 216-77-NANNY yournannyconnection.com

VISITING ANGELS

We are an in-home, senior care provider assisting the senior and older adult to live as independently as possible by remaining safely in their own home. Services include hygiene assistance, companionship, medication reminders, light housekeeping, laundry, meal preparation. errands and shopping. 216-231-6400 visitingangels.com/cleveland

MIND & BODY BODY SCULPTING AND BARRE FX

Body Sculpting is a cardiovascular strength-training class designed to make you lean and defined while providing a results-oriented whole body workout. More than 100 locations in Northeast Ohio. Barre FX is a challenging boutique ballet barre fitness class at an affordable price! Call for class locations. 440-729-3463 helper@flexcity.com flexcity.com

THE CENTER FOR STROKE & HAND RECOVERY, INC.

Don’t live with pain; regain your function! The Center for Stroke and Hand Recovery focuses on neurological injuries such as strokes, as well as hand and arm injuries including wrist and finger fractures, carpal tunnel syndrome and degenerative changes from arthritis. Dr. Sharon Covey, OTR/L 5910 Harper Rd, Suite 102 Solon, OH 44139 Strokeandhandrecovery.com Sharonotr11@yahoo.com 844-98-stroke | 844-987-8765

30 | BALANCEDFAMILY | FALL / WINTER 2017

IN MOTION PHYSICAL THERAPY

Advanced, evidencebased physical therapy for all your rehabilitation needs. Specialty services also available for spinal pain, dizziness, imbalance, foot and ankle disorders. Dr. Joseph Moskowitz, PT, DPT 14100 Cedar Road Suite 130 University Heights, OH 44121 216-577-1933 inmotionptohio.com

INSPIRAL MOTION

A boutique-style movement center offering holistic, inspirational instruction in GYROTONIC® and Pilates exercise. We specialize in joint issues, stress relief, self-care, body conditioning, balance and strength. Private instruction and group classes available. Join us for an hour or so of bliss. 20620 John Carroll Blvd. Suite 204 Shaker Hts OH 44118 216-320-9446 inspiralmotion.com

NATURE’S FIT OUTDOOR FITNESS PROGRAM

Sick of the gym but want to get fit? Sick of diets but want to eat healthier? Want greater peace? We can do that all by getting back to nature! For an hour, we will climb through a forest, discuss enriching concepts and lifestyle choices. You will witness a transformation of your mind, body and overall well-being. 216-650-5455

NEW DIRECTIONS, INC.

Treatment Makes a Difference.... Recovery Makes a Life. New Directions has provided quality life-changing treatment to adolescents and young adults with substance use and mental health needs for over 36 years. We provide comprehensive, holistic and personalized services to youth, young adults and their families/ caregivers. A continuum of services (from outpatient counseling to residential treatment) is available at our eastside of Cleveland location. Intake Department 216-591-0324 ext. 169 intake@newdirect.org newdirect.org

OPTIONS NATUROPATHIC

offers an approach to health care that assists in the process of understanding illness and supporting wellness. Thus I must understand everything that I can about human health, physiology, and disease. My role is to coach individuals on how to prevent and reverse illness and to optimize their health. Erin Holston Singh, N.D. 2460 Fairmount Blvd. Suite 219 Cleveland Heights, OH 44106 216-707-9137 optionsnaturopathic.com

PLATINUM HOME HEALTH

provides intermittent (or part-time) Physical and Occupational Therapy, Speech Therapy, Skilled Nursing and Home Health Care Aides to patients in the comfort of their own home by qualified, licensed and insured local professionals. We are proudly Veteran owned and operated. 5813 Mayfield Rd Suite 201 Mayfield Hts.OH 44124 (440) 995-0202 homehealthohio.org

SHADYBROOK

is a Northeast, Ohio, non-profit organization that hosts or sponsors programs, workshops, and seminars for adults, children, and families all geared towards cultivating personal growth, welcoming diverse ideas, ultimately improving awareness and enhancing your life. Visit www. shadybrook.org for more information. 216-556-5683 shadybrook.org

SJ HEALTH AND FITNESS

Susan is the trainer at SJ Health and Fitness. She holds ACE certifications in personal training and group fitness and a Pilates Pro Fitformer certification. She has YogaFit and mat Pilates instructor training. A fitness professional, Susan’s wellness philosophy is balance, fun, and self-love. 440-479-2583

ZEN MUSIC THERAPY

Now Accepting New Students for Fall/Winter Season Classes. A New Approach to Time-Tested Disciplines using Eastern Practices. Your Child (especially gifted or special needs) will learn Percussion & Drums in a user-friendly home environment. 1 hour classes 11:00am9:30pm. $65.00/hour, once a week, with guaranteed results or first 2 lessons are free. Taught by accredited, professional musician with 5 decades of experience. Lou Weinstock (216) 548-8171 cell (216) 297-1111 studio lou_weinstock@yahoo.com

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A family decision you can feel good about.

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Strongsville 440-238-3777


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