ON MY MIND
O fathers, where art thou? By Paul Kandarian
Spartacus is gone. In a weird way, so is my dad, all over again. Let me explain.
K
irk Douglas, star of Spartacus, his most iconic film, died in January at the age of 103, the last lion of old Hollywood, a vestige of the so-called golden era of moviemaking. Douglas was a warrior, a myth, a movie star, a legend, truly a great actor, a man’s man, as my father would put it – one of a kind. My dad, who died six years ago, worshipped him. So Douglas’s death was one last connection with the living that somehow kept my father alive, at least in my mind. Told you it was weird. He worshipped them all actually, guys like Burt Lancaster, Gary Cooper, Alan Ladd, Henry Fonda, Jimmy Stewart, Jimmy Cagney, Clark Gable and his number one: John Wayne. Dad loved the Duke, knew his movies by heart. Honestly, my father would practically get misty eyed watching John Wayne on the screen, silver or cathode ray. We’d be watching a John Wayne western on TV, and my dad would say, “Oh, you know what’s gonna happen now? Duke’s gonna punch that guy right in the mouth!” or something and sure enough it would happen, and I’d declare my dad a genius for having this uncanny knack of predicting movie plots. Didn’t dawn on me until years later that he’d seen the movie 100 times and naturally knew what was going to happen. He’d do
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the same thing driving with the family when it was raining, and say “I’m gonna stop the rain… right now!” and sure enough, the rain would stop, and I’d be crying, begging him to tell me how he did it. He wouldn’t, and I’d whine even more – with my mom and brother rolling their eyes at my not being able to figure out the temporary lack of rain was caused by going under bridges. My dad was bigger than life to me, and those actors of old were giants to him. He’d watch someone like Kirk or Burt take off their shirt and he’d marvel at the shape they were in, saying “Look at the build on that guy!” and then stand up and puff out his chest and strut around, making me laugh and love him all the more for his kooky coolness until I got older and couldn’t see that kooky coolness anymore, and in fact would be embarrassed by it. I’ve long regretted feeling that way. I absolutely loved watching movies with my dad. As kids, we’d go to the drivein and see things like The Longest Day, a quintessential old-school World War II movie with a legendary ensemble of actors he loved – The Duke, Fonda, Bob Mitchum, Richard Burton, Rod Steiger, Jeffrey Hunter, and so many more. When I got older, we’d go to the movies, just the two of us, seeing films like The Green Berets, A Man Called Horse, and The Unforgiven. The latter was the last we saw together. It is no coincidence it is one of my favorite films. I have said this before, but there is no doubt I’m an actor now
There is no doubt I’m an actor now because of my dad, and not just from the love of movies he instilled in me, but because he passed on a natural ability to me.
March 2020 | The South Coast Insider
