Coming of Age by Annie Horn

contents Title ........................................... 14 Editor’s Note ……………………………………….. 4 Winter Issues for Older Adults ………..….. 5 Title ........................................... 14 Pre-Planning: Why? When? How? ………. 8

Title ........................................... 14

Exercises That Fight Osteoporosis ….… 11

A Widow’s Wisdom …………….……………….. Title ........................................... 14 13 Staying Nourished ……………….…..………….. 15

Title ........................................... 14

Take in the Season ……………………..……….. 17

EDITOR Jen Graziano

CONTRIBUTING WRITERS Watson’s Catering Patti Condon Elizabeth Crafford Dr. Stephen Jones Lauren Just Maritza Pallone Sarah Jane Sandy

The Buck Family Feature …….…..………….. Title ........................................... 14 21 Bridging the Distance ………………………….. 22

Title ........................................... 14

Watson’s Winter Wellness Soup ………….. 25

Title ........................................... 14 27 Re-thinking Your Golden Years ….……….. Title ........................................... 14 Title ........................................... 14 Title ........................................... 14

Published By:

“A Place for All Reasons” Theresa Carroll, Co-Proprietor

HOMESTEAD INN—THOMAS HENKELMANN 420 Field Point Road | Greenwich, CT. 06830 (203) 869-7500 homesteadinn.com | thomashenkelmann.com

from the editor Dear Readers, Trained as a lawyer, and having spent the past 25 years in the funeral industry, and the past 2 hosting radio shows discussing age-related health, legal and planning issues, I realized that there are far too many issues as we age that are left undiscussed until it is too late. We are all products of human nature. We avoid that which is uncomfortable. We put off that which can be done tomorrow. The result, however is always the same; that the uncomfortable becomes reality and things can no longer be put off. Welcome to “Coming of Age”, a new publication where nothing is taboo, nothing is too sensitive to be discussed, and aging is both embraced and celebrated. Life is not time-stamped. While we are here on this Earth we are living, so do just that…LIVE! The pages you will turn contain important information to help maintain optimal quality of life. There are resources available to you as well as service-providing professionals that you should call upon and learn more about. There are stories shared here that beg to be told. It is my sincerest hope that you read them with open hearts and attentive minds. I’m excited for this new endeavor and being able to dive deeper into issues impacting our cherished senior community. More importantly, I’m excited to help bring solutions, hope and a positive outlook on aging. The commitment of my family is and will forever be to care for those during life’s difficult moments. This magazine strengthens that commitment by extending care to the moments before and after. Without further ado, I present to you, COMING OF AGE Copyright © 2018 All rights reserved. No part of this publication including but not limited to text and photographs may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher. For permission requests, write to the publisher, addressed.

Jen Graziano, Editor For more information on the services and resources provided by Coxe & Graziano, please visit: www.coxeandgraziano.com

Seasonal Depression: Winter Issues for Older Adults By: Dr. Stephen G. Jones

The winter months generally represent the most challenging season of the year for elder adults. Some issues you may face this time of year include; emotional sensitivity, physical exhaustion, nutritional wellness, and general safety. Here are some suggested tips tohelp combat the challenges of a harsh winter;

5. Get a Flu Shot & Pneumonia Vaccine

1. Maximize Daylight in Environment

7. Talk to a Friend

Utilize more lighting during non-daylight hours. Try and maintain normal sleep schedule and patterns

Holidays are stressful times and many people experience post-holiday blues. Caregivers may be less available this time of year and the holidays can be emotionally draining. The sheer act of sharing joys and concerns can protect against the losses that come with age.

2. Bundle Up Dress in layers and protect your extremities. Older adults are less able to feel and deal with colder temperatures. Reduced outdoor activities or go slower (i.e. walking for exercise). Increase indoor activities.

3. Use Proper Footwear on Ice and Snow & Use Handrails or Other Assists In the winter, there is an increased risk of slips and falls as well as risk of hip and wrist fractures. There is less daylight and colder temperatures.

4. Keep Baths & Showers Short Older adults’ skin is thinner and dries out more quickly. Moisturize immediately after bathing and avoid drying brands of soap. Use hypoallergenic moisturizers frequently and drink more water.

There is a higher risk of exposure to respiratory infections in winter. These vaccines provide additional needed protection as we age.

6. Maintain Good Nutrition & Hydration Because of the cold and ice, older adults may be less likely to go out for essentials like food and prescriptions. Also, you need to drink more water even if you don’t feel thirsty. In cold weather, the body’s thirst response is diminished because our blood vessels constrict when we’re cold to prevent blood from flowing freely to the extremities.

And…Rest Assured…Spring is on the way! Stephen G. Jones, MD is the Medical Director of Safety for Yale New Haven Health. He is an Associate Professor of Clinical Medicine at the Yale School of Medicine and double board certified in Internal and Geriatric Medicine.

Quality time has a whole new meaning. Dad’s condition became more complicated and we couldn’t manage it at home. Friends said the skilled nursing care their parents received at The Osborn Pavilion made a huge difference in all their lives. Now Dad has a lovely private room, and we can both enjoy our time together — just like we did before. Your quality time needn’t go away. It just moves to a new address. To learn more, please call 1-877-844-6681, or visit TheOsbornPavilion.org.

101 Theall Road | Rye, NY 10580 TheOsbornPavilion.org

Skilled Nursing • Rehabilitation • Memory Care

Add Our Care to Yours

The Osborn Pavilion is Medicare-certified and accepts third-party insurance plans and private pay. It is not a Medicaid provider. The Osborn is a not-for-profit 501(c)(3) charitable organization accredited by CARF-CCAC.

PrePlanning Why? How? When? By: Jen Graziano

t is human nature to shun what is uncomfortable. We avoid conversations and subjects that carry a heavy emotional weight and discomfort. However, human frailties need to be overcome to make progress and in this case, achieve ultimate peace of mind. Talking about uncomfortable subjects ultimately removes the discomfort, and allows us to freely express and exchange ideas. The above questions are best answered, based on their order; To ease the burden on your loved ones and make sure your wishes are known. Contact a reputable, trusted funeral home and set up an appointment NOW Life always requires a plan. When we find our soulmates and plan a wedding, we shop around for venue, dress, music, etc. When we look to buy a home, there is a detailed plan that involves where to live, how to obtain financing, etc. When we have a baby we think about names, schooling, daycare, what is the safest merchandise to buy, etc. Life events require us to do some homework. Aging is a life event. Death is a life event as well. And while it is a most uncomfortable reality, it is a reality nonetheless that we all must face.

WHY, THEN, WOULD WE NOT MAKE A PLAN? Making a pre-arrangement can be quite a simple process. You would sit down with a trusted funeral director and learn of the many choices available to you. Funerals can be simple yet meaningful at the same time. Funerals can also be customized to reflect the life which they are celebrating. There is no “right” nor “wrong” way to honor someone or ourselves. However, the choices are personal and are best made by the individual for whom the funeral is being planned. You have the option to pre-fund your funeral. This is never a requirement of a funeral home but can be a requirement if you are applying for Medicaid. Each state carries stringent laws determining eligibility for Medicaid and the need for a knowledgeable funeral director to walk you through the process is paramount. Monies for pre-funded funerals at any Coxe & Graziano or Zion Memorial Chapel location are placed safely in interest-bearing escrow accounts. You can call to find the balance of your account at any time and revocable accounts can be cancelled at will. Any of our funeral directors or in-house attorney will be happy to explain the differences between irrevocable and revocable accounts in a clear and understandable manner.

Funeral homes are not the same nor are funeral directors. Funeral homes are more than rooms with chairs. They are gathering points for a community, a central place to honor a life that was lived, a place where loved ones can say goodbye. A wake serves a pivotal role in the grief process. Affording people an opportunity to grieve is a great source of consolation. Providing them a beautiful facility in which to do so gives additional comfort. Even In the absence of a wake, selecting the right funeral home is still one of the most important decisions you will ever make. Aside from the owner’s reputation, it makes a difference who, in fact, the owner is? A family owned funeral home will always be tended to in a different manner than that of a conglomerate. A conglomerate funeral home answers to shareholders, investors and boards and every decision will be based upon building a better bottom line.

The focus of a family owned funeral home is quite simple…family. Private owners will always share deeper, more intimate connections with the communities they serve. Conglomerate owned funeral homes operate with gimmicks. For example, commissioned salesmen often host free seminar lunches to encourage you to sign up for your pre-need funeral. They accomplish their mission of reaching a monthly quota. The person they sign, however, is now faced with funding an exorbitant funeral bill. Their prices are always higher. We, the Graziano family, have no gimmicks. Rather, we have our reputation that has been nurtured over four generations. We are here to talk and answer questions whenever it is best for you. If you want to talk in the evening, we answer the phone. If you want to come on the weekend for an appointment, we will be here for you. We are not looking to generate a “sign up” list or email data base. We are here to walk you through a difficult process and make it somewhat easier to bear.

Sitting down with a funeral director does not mean that your life has now been timestamped. When a family sits with us and completes a pre-arrangement conference, we are often asked, “what’s next”? Our advice is always, “keep living”. Travel, socialize, go out to dinner, make friends and keep close to the ones you have. None of these activities should change simply because you have pre-arranged your funeral. What should change is the new peace of mind that you acquire by expressing your personal wishes. The knowledge that your close fam-ily will have a chance to grieve your passing rather than be burdened with heavy decisions, should be of great comfort. FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS Q. I’ve made pre-arrangements with another funeral home; can I transfer them? A. YES, transferring pre-arrangements is an easy, simple process that we can walk you through. You are not confined to previous selections you once made nor are you bound to a funeral home that may have moved locations or became part of a conglomerate. You are free to change your mind. Q. When can I make an appointment to discuss pre-arranging? A. ANYTIME, we are available seven days a week and have evening appointments as well for your convenience. Q. Can I pre-arrange my funeral without prefunding? A. YES, pre-funding is a requirement for Medicaid only, not the funeral home. We can simply create a file with your wishes without pre-payment. Q. Who should I bring with me to make prearrangements? A. ANYONE who you trust and feel comfortable having with you

THE FAMILY AND THE FACILITY THAT WESTCHESTER HAS TRUSTED FOR MORE THAN 30 YEARS WHEN IT COMES TIME TO FACE LIFE’S MOST DIFFICULT MOMENTS.

FAMILIES HAVE TRAVELED THE EXTRA MILE TO CALL UPON US, KNOWING FULL WELL WE WILL DO THE SAME FOR THEM.

Coxe

Graziano & FUNERAL HOME

767 E. Boston post rd. • Mamaroneck, ny 10543 914-698-5968 • info@coxeandgraziano.com

Simple Exercises That Help Fight Osteoporosis

here are a few things other than saving for retirement and eating healthy to maintain yourself in old age. Over the years, simple actions of getting out of bed in the morning, walking down stairs, or gripping an object may become suddenly difficult. If you have been caught off guard by loss of mobility or feel your body slowing down; it’s best to speak with your doctor before a bone or fracture occurs. Facing an uphill battle to preserve bone health, it’s important to be aware of a “silent” disease called osteoporosis. Often, you may not realize you have osteoporosis until a strain or fall causes a bone to break. Since you can’t actually feel bone loss, it is possible you may already

Written by Lauren Just Exercises by Maritza Pallone

have signs. Exercising and taking calcium or vitamins may help, but if you are over 50 years old or postmenopausal, lower estrogen may prevent the body’s ability to rebuild bone causing the risk for bone fractures. Get to “KNOW” Osteoporosis: Regular measuring of bone mineral density, or BMD, is the best way to gauge your risk for bone fractures. If you have osteoporosis or have had a fracture, your risk of having another fracture increases. Taking action with exercising and paying attention to body cues can lower your risk of breaks and sprains. Try these simple exercises to use daily to maintain movement and bone health.

7 Preventive Exercises to Fight Osteoporosis: 1. TOES UP Placing feet flat on the floor, move toes up and down.

2. HEELS UP Place heels on the floor, foot should be off the floor. Lift your foot up and down. Use a band to increase difficulty.

3. SHIFT WEIGHT

4. KNEES OVER FEET

Feet planted firmly on the floor with body in a sitting position. Grip side of the chair and shift weight left to right. Then right to left.

Place heels on the floor, foot should be off the floor. Lift your foot up and down. Use a band to increase difficulty.

5. STRAIGHTEN

6. SHIFTING LEG

Sitting keeping one leg in sitting position, extend other leg out to a straight position with heel on floor.

Shift body weight to one side and lift opposite leg until heel is off the floor.

7. SHIFTING LEG 2

LEARN MORE

If you feel strong enough, do steps 3-7 without holding on to the chair

soundbeachpilates.com

Maritza Pallone founded Sound Beach Pilates to share her knowledge and passion for the movement. She envisioned a small studio where one-on-one sessions would allow her to provide maximum benefits to her clients through proper, focused instruction. Learn more at soundbeachpilates.com.

a widow’s wisdom Told by Patti Condon and written by Lauren Just

John’s death experience itself, his horrific pain and suffering was unbearable to live with. Evermore, I was saddened yet relieved when the day finally came that broke me free into a new chapter of life.

Since the death of my husband, John, in June, 2014, I have spent a lot of time thinking, crying, and remembering the details of our life together. No longer able to share life with my best friend, dancing partner, travel companion, protector, and “comforter”; the reality of

Empowered by the unconditional love of my husband, I came to realize that I was left on Earth to not only exist, but to live and perhaps, even one day to love again. Overtime, I made it my personal goal to become better and not grow bitter, as I chose to embrace the “new me” and become the woman he would continue to be proud of. “Before I go, I must live on my own”, I would say to myself and to those who shared their regrets. Having been some-

he sunshine creeped through the curtains, when I woke in the morning. Feeling the sunshine over my face, a sense of peace filled the room as memories drifted though my mind of our marriage. It’s been a long time since I have felt like myself, but through strength and others love, I seem to have found a new space to live without him.

time now since the terrifying realization and overwhelming emptiness of being truly alone has controlled my life, I never forget or hold back the reality of my experience of becoming a window. Immediately after John died, Grief Counselor Terri Agliardo, reached out with a call and encouraged me to consider joining Coxe & Graziano’s on-going local grief support group, located in Mamaroneck, NY. Supporting all aspects of grief, I mustered up the strength to attend a meeting on the first Saturday following John’s burial. Surprisingly, the support and strength received that day began my very slow process of recovery. Taking another step, I attended a 6-8 week formatted widow’s group at Hospice & Palliative Care of Westchester, located in White Plains. Offering numerous tools and resources that I used to incorporate into my daily life, I didn’t hesitate to share them with my family who was also in my same boat. Turning a corner on a changing lifestyle, I was able to return back to work a few months later. Not able to pin point exactly when or how I managed to get to a better place, I believed in myself each and every day. Through the power of prayer, breathing and by putting one foot in front of the other (taking baby steps), I found a way to recognize the stranger that once stared back at me when looking in the mirror. Independently alone nearing the one year anniversary of John’s death, my soul became fueled and I gathered strength I didn’t know I possessed. I began to accept that the spirit of my personal Irish Angel had never left my soul. I knew his love and strength was speaking to my heart, and I tell others often that I’m grateful that breathing is an involuntary reflex. I’m now one of the veterans who continue to share a chair (and my heart) at our regularly scheduled meetings. Sometimes we are there to receive love and support, other times we are there to give love and support… we often refer

to our group as C&G family. My experience, as any widows is unique but we all find ourselves in the same pool of depression at first. For those sadly beginning their journey in need of advice, allow me to share a few lessons that may offer motivation to keep on going and smile. Allow yourself to cry without shame, have feelings and surround yourself with friends and family. Communication with others allow with prayer, will open the opportunity to recovery. Taking baby steps out of grief and will direct you towards happiness and to continue a fulfilling life.

“Once the emotional rollercoaster slows, the first step of personal recovery is refocusing your life. In order to care for others, you will need to find a way to once again take care of you– because without doing that, you will be unable to help them.” Diverting from a lifestyle that may have been over 25 years in the making and walking in another direction takes courage. But if your goal is that of securing a new purpose for yourself the journey will be easier. Finding a new lifestyle that secures a purpose and offers you structure to the day will be the light a the end of the dark, dark tunnel of grief. Gaining clarity and personal strength to move forward broke me free of marriage. I am a widow and I am carried by the love and support of my children, our family, our closest friends and neighbors. We have all preserved his memory in our hearts. Each night the sky draws its light, but his light lays deep in my soul. He remains on my mind as I say my prayers and kiss his pillow goodnight. Oh how I miss him and the life we shared, however, once again I am strong, I am confident, I am grateful and I am blessed in so many ways. I have found hope again…and when I wake in the morning the light of day will shine on me once again.

Staying Nourished By Sarah Jane Sandy

hat you eat and how your fuel your body following the death of a loved one is of utmost importance. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s one of the first things to go out the window - you forget to eat, sleeping becomes a challenge, and in response your immune system starts to fail and your body is unable to efficiently support your emotional and physical recovery.

hole, real, nutrient-dense foods and targeted supplementation can help to positively shape your recovery. It’s especially important during this time to make conscious food decisions - it can be easy to forgo eating all together, or do the opposite and comfort eat. Neither of which are great for your overall health or emotional recovery. Incorporating high quality fats and proteins at every meal and snack – think grass-fed butter, organic pasture-raised eggs, coconut oil, fermented foods, and grass fed meats – will keep your blood sugar stabilized to support a strong immune system; clear thinking; and a healthy heart. All of which are necessary when recovering from the loss of a loved one. What you’re unable to get nutrient-wise through food can be offset by including daily high-quality supplements. My go-to supplements to support overall well-being at this stage in life include: Complete Multi (3 capsules, twice daily with meals): this full-spectrum multivitamin contains everything your body needs in an chelated form for maximum absorption and bioavailability. Omegatropic (2 softgels per day): DHA and EPA are functional fatty acids that protect the brain against oxidative damage, while supporting memory and cognitive function. Brain Vitale (2 capsules per day): contains brain-supportive nutrients that optimize brain function while supporting healthy cognition, mood, and memory. Insomnitol (1 chewable before bed): supports quality sleep and the promotion of calming brain activity. It encourages your body’s natural ability to fall asleep and stay asleep. Nourishing your body with intention through diet and supplements is an important step in emotional recovery.

All supplements & more information at www.sarahjanesandy.com Sarah Jane Sandy is a Functional Nutritionist and Women’s Health Expert. She works with clients remotely all over the world through 1:1 consultations, and highly innovative online programs. Sarah runs a busy private nutrition practice and is passionate about using food as therapy; to heal, to transform, to change, and to nourish. She emphasizes the importance of eating whole, real, pastured, wild caught, traditional, nutrient-dense, properly prepared foods, and believes these are the keys to unlocking one’s most vibrant self. In her clinical experience, she has witnessed the dramatic benefits of implementing simple dietary and lifestyle changes time and time again: stable blood sugar, weight loss, reduced inflammation, fertility enhancement, improved blood lipids, balanced energy levels, improved sleep patterns, reduced allergies, more efficient workouts, and much more. Please contact Sarah for more information at sarah@sarahjanesandy.com

Take in The

Season 10 Things To Do Locally This Winter By Elizabeth Crafford

Bruce Museum- Voted the â&#x20AC;&#x153;Best Museumâ&#x20AC;? consistently by local media, the Bruce Museum houses an extensive collection of worldclass content highlighting art, science, and natural history. With both permanent galleries featuring regional and global perspectives in nature and the sciences, as well rotating exhibitions, this small museum gem is sure to bring you back to discover more. Bruce Museum 1 Museum Drive Greenwich, CT 06830-7157 Phone: 203.869.0376 Website: https://brucemuseum.org

Bush-Holley House- A National Historic Landmark, the Bush-Holley Historic Site has been home to the Greenwich Historical Society since 1957 with collections chronicling Greenwich’s colorful history. Boasting an extensive research library with archives it is also home to the Vanderbilt Education Center, 1805 Storehouse Gallery, rotating exhibitions, and a museum store.

The Ritz-Carlton 3 Renaissance Square White Plains, NY 10601 Phone: 914) 467-5888 www.ritzcarlton.com/en/hotels/ new-york/westchester/spa

Bush-Holley Historic Site 39 Strickland Road, Cos Cob, CT 06807 Phone: 203-869-6899 www.greenwichhistory.org

The Westchester Mall- With 150 stores such as Nordstrom, Neiman Marcus, Crate & Barrel, Burberry, Tiffany, Microsoft, & Apple, shoppers are sure to find their destination. Enjoy lunch or dinner at one of the premier dining restaurants including, Café Nordstrom, Hai Street Kitchen, Mariposa, or P.F. Chang’s. Bringing your little shoppers? The Westchester offers Kidgits, an interactive center for children to participate in various events and activities. The Westchester 125 Westchester Ave White Plains, NY 10601 Phone: 914-421-1333 www.simon.com/mall/ the-westchester

Spa at the White Plains RitzOnly a short distance from the bustle of NYC, escape to a world of peace and serenity in one of the most luxurious spas in Westchester, NY. Under the gentle touch of a professional therapist and the calming aura of a spa retreat, visitors may select from an array of treatments and spa packages to help relax, heal, and revive.

MUSE- Who says you can’t multitask? Sip and Paint! Muse combines painting instruction with an in-house restaurant and bar. Hosting painting classes 7 days a week with new daily murals, Muse is the perfect place for entertaining those of all ages as well as being a venue for private parties. Best of all, Muse gives back to the local community by donating 5% of profits to local causes-so go find your Muse! Muse 55 N. Main Street South Norwalk, CT Phone: 203-989-2600 www.musepaintbar.com

6 7

Sound Beach Pilates- Founded by Maritza Pallone, Sound Beach Pilates is an intimate Pilates studio designed to share passion and knowledge for movement. Through one-to-one sessions, clients will gain a thorough understanding of their individual needs and abilities while receiving professional and focused instruction. Through private sessions, clients are sure to get results to help build flexibility, strength and endurance. Please see our Fighting Osteoporosis article to learn more about Maritza and her exercise routines. Sound Beach Pilates • 210 Sound Beach Avenue, Suite 3 Old Greenwich, CT • Phone: 914-772-6722 • soundbeachpilates.com

Golf Performance Center- With a state of the art training facility and expert coaching, the Golf Performance Center strives to help athletes of all levels reach their goals. Beginning with an individual evaluation, the golf academy delivers customized golf instruction and improvement strategies for long-term performance success on the course. Golf Performance Center 824 Ethan Allen Highway Ridgefield, CT 06877 Phone: (203) 790-4653 www.thegolfperformancecenter.com

The Philip Johnson Glass House- Built between 1949 and 1995 by architect Philip Johnson, the Glass House, is a National Trust Historic site located in New Canaan, CT. Located on a 49-acre landscape surrounded by fourteen structures, the Glass House features a permanent collection of 20th century painting and sculpture along with temporary exhibitions. The Glass House Visitor Center + Design Store 199 Elm Street New Canaan, CT 06840 Phone: 203-594-9884 theglasshouse.org

Reorganize your Home –Do you have cabin fever? Take advantage of extra time spent indoors this winter and tackle larger organizing projects that you’ve been avoiding. Clearing the clutter and bringing order to every room in your home will reap benefits for the entire year. Investigate professional local organizers at: www.napo.net.

Take in a local Show (Tarrytown Musical Theater and Westport Playhouse)- Looking for great live entertainment but hoping to avoid the busy city? Visit Westport Country Playhouse and Tarrytown Musical Theater, two of the most popular and loved quaint venues to see the best in music, theater, dance and film. Westport Country Playhouse 25 Powers Court Westport, CT 06880 Phone: (203) 227-4177 www.westportplayhouse.org • Tarrytown Music Hall 13 Main St. Tarrytown, NY 10591 Phone: 914.631.3390 Website: tarrytownmusichall.org

THE OSBORN 101 Theall Road, Rye, NY 10580

914-925-8200

www.TheOsborn.org

The Osborn is a not-for-profit retirement community offering a continuum of care on a park-like 56-acre campus in Rye, New York. Short-term and outpatient rehabilitation and long-term care are available in The Osborn Pavilion Skilled Nursing facility with all private rooms. The Osborn also provides excellent care for people with a diagnosis of dementia in a secure, homelike setting in the H.O.P.E. Center for Memory Care. Assisted Living offers private apartments with care management and personal care services. Spacious Independent Living apartments and garden homes are also available with a 100% refundable entrance fee. The Osborn is accredited by CARF, the nation’s only organization attesting to a continuing care retirement community’s resident-centered focus, effective governance and financial stability.

The Osborn’s stunning 56 acre campus is matched by the quality of care and exceptional staff.

The Pavilion Lounge is a warm, welcoming place to enjoy visits with family and friends.

Residents socialize and dine in the Pavilion Dining Room with a prime view of the perennial garden.

THE H.O.P.E. CENTER FOR MEMORY CARE AT THE OSBORN The H.O.P.E. Center for Memory Care emphasizes the capabilities of those affected by dementia and provides opportunities for socializing, personal expression, enjoyment of the outdoors in a secure Wander Garden, and the flexibility that is so valuable for people with dementia. The H.O.P.E. Center received an award for Senior Living Memory Care Design from Senior Housing News, honoring the beauty and suitability of this homelike residence. The Osborn is a 501(c)(3) not-for-profit charitable organization accredited by CARF. It is the policy of The Osborn to provide services to all persons without regard to race, color, religion, creed, national origin, handicap/disability, blindness, sex, sexual orientation, marital status or sponsor.

Larry Lefever Photography

Family Feature In 2016, the VWM Families Foundation was formed to raise awareness, funding, and to support families living with VWM. Currently there is only one research project operating in Tel Aviv. Making real progress, the VWM Families Foundations is working tirelessly to raise $1 million to assist in the growth of researchers. Please consider donating at www. vwmff.org Thus, in the efforts to gain social attention, the foundation also has taken a page from the “ice bucket challenge” and created “cream pie challenge”. Join the fun and share videos of getting a cream pie in the face to raise money for VWM at www.facebook.com/SamVsVwm

THE BUCK FAMILY

Quest for a Cure By Lauren Just The Bucks, of Glenville, have been fighting against time publicly sharing their passion for awareness and funding of research on the neurological condition Vanishing White Matter, VWM. Parents, Allyson and Nick and two other children, have recently embarked on a journey filled with love, hope and determination to find a cure for VWM which can extend the life of their youngest son, Sam. Vanishing White Matter disease (VWM), is a very rare condition that destroys the brain’s white matter, which permanently affects brain signals to the rest of the body. One in 40 diseases, collectively as known as Leukodystrophies, there are roughly 250 people worldwide that suffer from this untreatable and incurable disease. Sam, now seven, was diagnosed with VWM at age two, after a small accident had surfaced the terminal illness. Directly affecting standing and walking, Sam wears a helmet at all times now, and he uses a wheelchair when he goes to classes at Glenville School.

While there have been promising developments that may slow the condition, Sam’s parents know progress might not come soon enough to delay the inevitable. So please share Sam’s story and offer a helping hand to a boy who needs it the most. For more information, including about making donations, visit VWM Families Foundation: https://vwmff.org/

Bridging the Distance Using digital devices to communicate and play with the family.

Learning and using technology can be daunting, especially when family is long distance. Tackle the learning curves & connect with any of these basic options and within a few steps, open the world of communication so you may bridge the distance between out of town relationships.

COMMUNICATION

• FaceTime Imagine reading a bedtime story to your grandkids through video over your phone. Using Apple devices on the iPhone 4 and higher allows video calls, face to face from anywhere in the world, as long as you have an active internet connection. Simply dial on your phone and enjoy a conversation through video.

• Google Hangout Another video option you can use privately from your Gmail account or Android devices. Click on a person’s name on the left side in your chat list, and you’ll see the option for video. Initiate and participate in text, voice or video chats, either one-on-one or in a group.

• Skype Allows users to communicate through both instant messaging and voice chat. Voice chat allows telephone calls between pairs of users and conference calling both voice and video.

APPS & VIRTUAL ACTIVITIES

• Scoot and Doodle If you have already installed Google Hangout, it’s easy to get started with Scoot and Doodle. It’s a perfect website for long-distance grandparents to draw and play with grandchildren. Scoot and Doodle is well suited for interacting with your teen grands and young adult grandchildren.

PHOTOS & MESSAGING

• Instagram Follow the perspective of your grandkids visually. Instagram is a mobile, desktop, and Internet-based photo-sharing application that allows users to share pictures and videos either publicly, or privately to pre-approved followers.

• Facebook A popular free social networking website that allows registered users to create profiles, upload photos and video, send messages and keep in touch with friends, family and colleagues.

• Little Peanut on the Go Designed for parents and grandparents. It allows parents to easily and safely share information with someone who is caring for a child. All information relating to a grandchild’s care is logged into the app. Packing lists also assist in keeping up with the kids’ belongings, too.

• Pi’ikea Pronounced pee-ee-kay-uh, this website offers family-friendly apps for iPhone, iPad or iPod. Generously sized pictures offer hundred of crafts, including easy to read directions. Enjoy sharing the experience of art with the grandchildren, while introducing artists like Georges Seurat.

Watsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Winter Wellness Soup Ingredients 1. 1 large onion, peeled and sliced 2. 1 clove garlic, peeled and crushed 3. 1 turnip, peeled and chopped 4. 1 medium parsnip, peeled and chopped 5. 2 cups vegetable stock 6. 2 ribs celery, chopped 7. 2 cups spinach 8. 1/2 bunch flat leaf parsley 9. Lemon juice to taste Directions 1. Saute onion and garlic in a sauce pan with 1/4 cup stock for 4 minutes. Add turnip and parsnip, saute for another 3 minutes. 2. Add the rest of stock, simmer for 10 minutes. 3. Stir in celery and spinach, simmer for 5 minutes. 4. Add parsley at the end, simmer for 1 minute. 5. Pour mixture into a blender, or use an immersion blender, blend until smooth. 6. Add lemon juice to taste. 24

Watsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Catering | 1 Glenville Street | Greenwich, CT 06831 | www.watsonscatering.com

FOR OVER 20 YEARS, ONE FUNERAL HOME HAS STOOD ALONE. ONE FUNERAL HOME HAS EXISTED SOLELY FOR THE JEWISH COMMUNITY. NO CONGLOMERATE AFFILIATIONS, NO SHARED FACILITIES, JUST A COMMITMENT TO SERVE IN A WAY NO OTHER FUNERAL HOME CAN. OUR FIRM REPRESENTS A TEAM OF KNOWLEDGEABLE PROFESSIONALS WHO PROVIDE PERSONAL SERVICE AT LOWER COSTS.

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Living, Planning, Doing: Rethinking Your Golden Years Co-proprietor of a renowned luxury boutique hotel and four-star contemporary French restaurant in Greenwich; a talented interior designer and former actress; and a busy mom and grandmother; Theresa Carroll defines the tagline: Living, Planning, Doing. In the pages that follow, Theresa shares with us how she is redefining the idea of her golden years and her thoughts on retirement.

Opened in 1997, Homestead Inn – Thomas Henkelmann has defined exquisite service, exceptional food, and an attention to detail unmatched in the area. Prior to opening, Theresa spent years dreaming of opening a restaurant. While she understood the social aspect, the interiors, and the “front of the house”, she lacked skill and knowledge of the kitchen. It was while living in Rye, NY, as a mom of 3, that Theresa decided to pursue true French cooking. Theresa approached her friend and owner of La Panetiere, Jacques Loupiac, for a role in the kitchen. Before long, she became a kitchen Entremetier to the Poissonnier – preparing vegetables. It was in this role that she began to understand the workings of the kitchen, the process of creating a dish, and truly grasp the full gravity of what it would be like to own a restaurant. What is the driving force behind your passion and commitment to your work?

My passion began with fine food and French food in particular. As an American, I wasn’t familiar with all of the flavors found in French cuisine. I found them intriguing and fell in love with the consistency, the texture, and the science behind how dishes came to be. During this time, Theresa met her future partner, Thomas Henkelmann. A highly regarded and award-winning chef, Thomas brought a culinary repertoire that was unmatched in the suburban New York and Connecticut communities. Both Theresa and Thomas knew they wanted a restaurant in the suburbs – one that would be close enough to gather guests from New York City, but removed from the chaos of the city streets. They came across the current property on which Homestead Inn – Thomas Henkelmann resides in the exclusive Belle Haven area over twenty years ago and Theresa recalls loving the atmosphere, building and location. There was only one glitch…she had written her whole business plan based on a restaurant and the location also was a hotel. Quick thinking and smart partners helped her and Thomas make the jump to being restaurant and luxury boutique hotel owners. Once Theresa learned how to handle both sides of the business and Thomas put together an

unmatched menu and level of service, the duo quickly rose to the top of the cuisine and hospitality list. It is with this history and expertise that we asked Theresa to shed some light on how she defines Living, Planning, and Doing.

“In Order to Give Great Service, You Have to Have Received Great Service” Have you considered stepping back from your business to enjoy life? Has the word “retirement” crossed your mind? If not, why? Retirement doesn’t occur to me. I don’t want to retire. When the time is right, I will use my experience and expertise to move onto something else that allows me a little more freedom to travel, to see my children, and to spend time with my grandchildren. But right now, I absolutely love getting up in the morning with a purpose – putting on makeup, getting dressed, and facing the excitement AND the challenges of owning a restaurant and luxury boutique hotel. You mentioned working towards a time where you put your experience and expertise to use for the things you love, what does that look like for you? I want to work with an organization or project that has some permanence, where I am remunerated, and where I find joy. While the amount of remuneration doesn’t matter, the very act of remuneration matters. I love the idea of volunteering, if you are doing it for the greater good. But I believe, there are many times where the cause may benefit more from financial support. I have causes I support, but I don’t always want to work for them.

Are the challenges faced in your business the same today as they were when you began?

Where has your life’s work taken you? What was your first career?

No! The use of technology in every aspect of life has changed our entire business. I’ve had to become flexible and adept at computer programs. I spend far more time that I would like learning new systems – I am trying to run a business, not become a tech wizard! In 1997, all of our reservations were being done on graph paper with colored tape. Now, we have several different software to record dinner reservations, not to mention the luxury boutique hotel aspect, corporate meetings, weddings, events, and more.

My first careers focused on acting and the camera – first as an actress, then as a casting company owner. Finally, I did interior design. All of these careers helped me realize that I need a creative outlet in my life. I also knew that I always wanted to have a restaurant – it was my passion from my 20s. When I finally realized I had to do it, I was a mom and didn’t want to give up my family life so I waited and I took my time learning the business. By the time my children were heading to college, I felt that I could pursue my dream and it was then that Thomas and I opened Homestead Inn – Thomas Henkelmann.

If you could give a young person advice for starting a business similar to yours, now knowing what you do, what would it be? Do what I attempted to do - write as comprehensive a business plan as possible and know that you don’t know everything. You need to find people that you trust, that are educated in the area that you are not, so that you can build a business that is sound. As an entrepreneur, you must know your numbers, you need to work hard to find the data, and then you need to own them. It is an arduous process that takes time. Make your mistakes on paper. It took me over a year to write the business plan and boy, did I have to lean on our investor partners - it was like getting a PhD. I am thankful every day for it.

What were the challenges you faced balancing your family life with your work? My family is very important to me and they come first. Throughout their childhood, we always had dinner as a family so we could share our day. That is not to say that I didn’t miss sports game, I did. But I didn’t miss their life. I was there for them, they know that, and we are a close family because of it. Describe the rewards and benefits of working with a partner? What do you feel are the hardships, if any? There are several benefits – the main one being that to be involved with a partner, you are typically both very committed and both good

“I love the idea Ray Dalio put forth on the meritocracy of ideas - it’s not always who has the right answer or if you are wrong, but if you pull in people that are smart with a different point of view and a different skillset, and are open to discussion, you can build incredible things.”

“My passion began with fine food and French food in particular. As an American, I wasn’t familiar with all of the flavors found in French cuisine. I found them intriguing and fell in love with the consistency, the texture, and the science behind how dishes came to be.” at different parts of the business. Thomas and I have worked well as partners because we do two very different things and we respect each other in that way.

Do you believe that women face difference challenges than men in the workplace? Do you feel this continues regardless of a woman’s age or time spent in her career?

Do you believe that every entrepreneur should step back from their business at some point, or at a certain age?

It’s a challenge for a woman on a lot of levels to be in business just by virtue of her sex. It is valid that women are ignored at the board table, talked over, that they don’t have the same physical wingspan as a man, but that does not make me feel less than. I like to be listened to, just as any other human being. Do I want credit for my ideas, absolutely. But I don’t think that that this makes me a feminist, it is being a humanist. Being in business as a woman has challenges, but I believe we just have to make ourselves heard.

If you’ve lost your passion, it is time to step back. I have not had to step back, because I make it a priority to maintain balance in my life. I also make certain that the people I work with are capable, trustworthy, and invested. Our business is part of our employees lives and we don’t take that lightly. It is due to this fact, maintenance of balance, and my family that I remain as active.

What do you love most about Greenwich? If you could meet your younger self, what advice would you give her – in life, in family, in work? Follow your passion, not the money. If you’re passionate, the money will follow you. If you’re focused, the success will follow you. I’m not telling you to be a dreamer, but don’t cripple yourself with too harsh a reality. Believe in yourself and in what your doing. Also be open to listen to good advice, even if it is critical.

Its my home, where my children went to school, and where I have grown my business. I love that the town has grown and I have enjoyed all the stages of it. One thing I do miss is the boutiques and family-run shops on Greenwich Avenue. The high costs of rent have forced so many out, and while I want real estate owners to make money, I don’t want to have it happen at the demise of our community. How do you spend your leisure time? I love to read – typically, three or four books a week. It’s a wonderful way to wind down and recharge.

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