Dan Palmer

Professional Rugby Union Prop Inspires Others, Including Me

When I first discovered rugby in 2004, I was immediately hooked on the sport and wished I had found the sport in high school! Just two years after this revelation I participated in my first Bingham Cup, International Gay Rugby’s biennial rugby championship, and as a direct result of that experience, Compete Magazine was launched to finally provide magazine coverage for LGBTQ+ athletes. I guess you could say Compete has rugby in its roots.

Last month Dan Palmer, a former Australian rugby union player came out. Palmer played tighthead prop, the companion position to the position I played, loosehead prop. In coming out Palmer talked about the suicidal thoughts that plagued him during his rugby career. His story sounded very similar to Ryan O’Callaghan’s journey while playing in the National Football League.

Palmer is only the second professional rugby union player to come out, second to Gareth Thomas. Ian Roberts and Keegan Hirst also came out but both were both rugby league players, the difference being union or league.

I applaud Dan Palmer for his bravery for coming out and for surviving the torment of being a closeted professional athlete. In coming out he described a journey filled with drug problems and mental health issues. His decision to come out was partially fueled by Israel Folau’s anti-gay statements which ended with Folau being fired by Rugby Australia in 2017. Folau now plays for Catalans Dragons, a French rugby league team.

On a worldwide basis professional athletes are still coming out at a very slow place. And when professional athletes like Palmer, O’Callaghan and so many others have talked about how they saw their only other option as suicide, it’s no wonder. In 1990 English footballer Justin Fashanu became the first professional active soccer player to come out during his career. But once his playing days were over, he committed suicide in 1998.

The NBA’s Jason Collins and MLS’s Robbie Rogers both continued to play professional sports after coming out in 2013. It wasn’t until 2018 that MLS player Collin Martin came out, at the time making him the only openly gay professional U.S. athlete in any of the five major team sports – MLS, NBA, NFL, NHL and MLB.

But maybe that is starting to change. The fact that Martin’s current team, the San Diego Loyal SC chose to walk off the pitch and forfeit the game while winning to protest an opposing player who was using homophobic slurs against Martin hopefully served as a wakeup call that winning is not more important than respect.

I am so grateful to the professional athletes who serve as role models by coming out. Their commitment to living an authentic life inspires everyone. Dan Palmer, thank you. I appreciate your courage. And from one rugby player to another, I am with you.

With You,

@CompeteEric Eric Carlyle (He, Him, His), SDLT Publisher/CEO eric@competesportsdiversity.com