a long journey that’s worth the wait

ONE COUPLE’S WINDING PATH to PARENTHOOD

Phoebe and Madalyn are twins but they are as different as two 15-month-old girls can be. Rambunctious, sweet and total Daddy’s girls, they have brought a whirlwind of joy and happiness to their parents, Stephanie and Norman Tupper.

But the path to becoming parents wasn’t always clear for this North Dakota couple. The Tuppers aren’t alone. In fact, one in eight couples struggle with infertility. When things weren’t happening for them, they visited a nearby clinic for some tests to see what was going on.

“Essentially the doctor said that we were young and should keep trying,” states Stephanie. “That was kind of devastating, because I knew in my heart that something wasn’t right. So I said I was done with them and we found our way over to Sanford Reproductive Medicine.”

Once at Sanford Reproductive Medicine, the Tuppers learned a bit more about why they might not have been successful on their own. The Sanford team created a customized treatment plan to help the Tuppers become parents. They started down the path, but after some time, they decided to put pregnancy on hold.

“We actually considered adoption,” says Stephanie. “We went through counseling and were just about ready to get approved to start meeting families. But everything we had been through had placed an incredible strain on both of us and we knew that we needed to pause and work on us first.”

After spending time focusing on their health and their relationship, they returned to Sanford Reproductive Medicine a few years later, stronger than ever and ready to try again.

“We started the process for in vitro fertilization,” explains Stephanie. “I did the shots, they extracted 35 of my eggs and then they started the fertilization process. I had 22 become fertilized. So, there was a bit of a moment of panic when my husband thought I was going to turn into Octomom,” jokingly laughs Stephanie. “But of those 22, only four made it through the five day culture period.”

And even though Stephanie had four successfully fertilized eggs waiting for implantation, she began to experience feelings of worry and doubt.

“After starting out with so many and then ending up with only four, it kind of wrecked me,” confides Stephanie. “But the team at Sanford Reproductive Medicine helped relieve some of that worry and told me to not let that matter. The team assured me that I still had a very good chance.”

A Sanford Reproductive Medicine policy only allows for the implantation of two eggs at a time to decrease the chance of multiples. Stephanie underwent the procedure with two eggs and after almost 10 years of waiting, the Tuppers were just nine months away from meeting their twin girls.

With their two little girls here now — happy, healthy and right on track — Stephanie wants to encourage other women who may also be struggling with infertility.

“This is so common and I don’t think it’s something we really talk about enough,” says Stephanie. “I know I didn’t want to talk about it at first when I was going through it. Your hormones are off the charts and your emotions are everywhere. But I want other women to not be scared to go to your doctor and get answers. And if you don’t like their answers, go somewhere else. Because if this is something you want, it might be hard, but it is so worth it.”