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Friends of the Children

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HER MOTHER,

HER MOTHER,

creating generational change , one child at a time

WORDS : KRISTAN BULLINGER PHOTOGRAPHY : AREA WOMAN STAFF PHOTOGRAPHER

John Fisher often remarks that Friends of the Children could not have come to the Fargo-Moorhead community at a better time. Joining as the newly formed chapter’s executive director in July 2019, he’s seen firsthand how their unique model of providing long-term, one-on-one mentors to children facing extreme challenges has impacted local youth and families, especially in the face of the COVID-19 Pandemic.

Founded more than 26 years ago in Oregon with the goal of breaking the cycle of generational poverty, Friends of the Children pairs children facing the greatest obstacles with a salaried, professional mentor called a “friend.” Friends spend 4 hours per week with each child from their enrollment at 4-6 years old through high school graduation — 12+ years, no matter what.

That over-arching promise of “no matter what,” the new chapter’s team learned early on, includes navigating a pandemic.

“The families we serve were already dealing with immense challenges before the pandemic. Closures of schools, loss of jobs or job prospects, lack of transportation and even navigating living conditions within crowded shelters were all challenges that added another layer of stress and uncertainty,” shares Program Director David Kemper. “Thankfully, our mentors were there to provide crucial support.”

Full-time, professional mentors at Friends of the Children each support a roster of eight children. The program is free for families, and children are referred into the program by community partners including schools, shelters and social service organiza- tions. This wrap-around support is provided to children whose “friend” may be the only consistent adult in their life.

Gabriella’s* family was hit particularly hard by COVID-19. Several members of the household have compromised immune systems, which made their reliance on public transportation difficult to continue. The family’s primary caregiver, a single mom, was in the process of getting a job, but it fell through when closures began. With Gabriella and her three siblings now home, it was a struggle just to maintain enough food each day.

Kemper and Gabriella’s “friend,” Kristy Tran, quickly stepped in with additional support. They delivered school and food pantry meals and provided additional supplies and activities. Kristy connected with Gabriella’s teacher and assisted with distance learning assignments. The team even advocated for the family and connected them with a $500 emergency grant to help them stay afloat.

The Friends team makes it a priority to not only support the children they serve, but also their families. They reached out to each of their local families to determine specific needs during the months of uncertainty and found that most were in similar situations.

In addition to a lack of funds and necessities, not having the devices, internet access or support needed to participate in distance learning was a common issue uncovered. Friends of the Children was able to secure donations of tablets to ensure each student was equipped to participate and connect additional families to grants to help with bills.

Several of the children’s situations became so unstable during the pandemic, they were placed into foster care. Although the program was in only its first year, case workers had already seen the amazing impact of “friends’” consistent involvement in the lives of the children and were quick to call upon them to provide additional support during this traumatic time.

* Name has been changed to protect the privacy of children and families.

“We’ve found that our ‘friends’ develop such a strong relationship with the families that they are often the first person called in a time of crisis,” says Fisher.

The national organization, now armed with more than two decades of third-party data proving their courageous and unique mentoring model works, is expanding the program to new cities across the country at an electric pace. Fargo-Moorhead’s chapter, founded by a small group of local champions, is at the forefront of this expansion.

With continued support from the community, including a catalytic investment from CHARISM, Friends of the Children has recently hired two additional professional mentors who will begin building lasting relationships with a new class of local children this fall. While much is uncertain in how school and life will continue throughout this year and beyond, Friends of the Children’s model remains the same.

“Research has shown that the single most important factor for building resiliency in children who face the highest risks is a long-term, consistent relationship with a caring adult,” says Kemper. “We are that person for children in our community who need it most.”

About Friends of the Children

Friends of the Children’s local chapter launched in 2019 with the mission of impacting generational change by empowering youth who are facing the greatest obstacles through relationships with professional mentors — 12+ years, no matter what. They are part of a national organization whose successful model has grown to serve 22 locations in their 26 year history. Their work has been featured in The New York Times, Stanford Social Innovation Review, Forbes and CBS News. Visit friendsfargomoorhead.org or call 701-388-5241 to learn more.

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