Family isn’t always blood.

it stung me. I teared up, became sad and almost angry. Stitch wasn’t “blood.” He didn’t even look like them, and yet they welcomed him in like he belonged. Bitter and confused I turned the movie off, assumingly never to turn it on again.

I tried for years to understand why it brought up so much pain, how a simple movie could trigger such pain in an adolescent. Twenty years later that quote and the adorable Disney movie it belonged to, “Lilo and Stitch,” is one of my favorites, as it expresses what I always deeply desired from family but couldn’t put into words. Loyalty, acceptance and love. Stitch wasn’t “family” in the traditional sense of the word, but he was their family. He didn’t look anything like them, nor did he talk like them. Yet, they loved each other and welcomed him into their home. They did their best to protect, love and care for each other. As they faced horrible, life-changing obstacles together, they trusted one-another and their love never wavered.

Family isn’t always blood.

It has been said that comparison is the thief of joy, and I agree. Yet, when you feel you are lacking in what seems to be such a treasured gift, it seems impossible to not feel pain.

It’s true you don’t choose your blood, but you do get to choose who you have in your life.

Maybe… you never knew your parents, you were raised by a single parent, you had an alcoholic parent, you had a seemingly perfect upbringing, you were the black sheep.

No, you may not have what’s commonly referred to as a “broken family,” but maybe it still feels broken to you.

Are you lucky enough, though, to have someone who would drop everything if you needed help? Someone, maybe, who offers to take your kids so you can have a night out with your husband? A person who disagrees with your choices but who would never think to communicate that to anyone but you?

You may not have had what you deserved, and that pain is real, so acknowledge it. Then, find gratitude for those people — the family you chose — because they chose you too.