Amy Lee

started her wedding planning business, Breathe and Relax Events, five years ago. But the seeds for this particular calling were sown much earlier.

“It’s kind of a combination of a few different things that brought me to where I am today,” Lee explains, a mixture of effervescence and efficiency coloring her words. “My dad owned a movie theater and I’ve always been a romantic movie, happy ending kind of person. I love ‘love stories’ in general.”

A childhood fueled by family (and more than a few films at her father’s Park River, North Dakota, movie theater) left Lee with many happy memories. She earned a degree in sales, marketing and management from Northland Community and Technical College in East Grand Forks and spent over decade working in creative and wedding-adjacent fields. Lee styled brides’ and promgoers’ hair for more than 15 years, enjoyed a long career as a DJ, perfected her photography skills and also worked as a commercial and residential interior designer.

Lee flitted between these creative fields with verve and curiosity, gathering experience and gaining expertise. She worked with a variety of people and worked tirelessly to help her clients discover and elevate their own style. Don’t let her winding career path (or her fondness for blush pink, happy endings and anything with sparkles) fool you — Lee is fiercely driven, impeccably organized and laser focused.

Just like in the romantic movies Lee loves, a suitor soon arrived on the scene. She fell in love with her now-husband Matt and the couple was delighted to learn they’d soon be welcoming a baby.

But dark days were coming for our leading lady. In 2014, Lee lost her mom to cancer. Just six months later, she and Matt welcomed a daughter, Juliette. Lee found herself navigating the ups and downs of new motherhood while grieving the loss of her mom. As the couple planned their wedding, tragedy struck again; Lee’s dad passed away seven months before the ceremony.

Wedding planning can be stressful, time consuming and difficult under the best of circumstances. But when the mother of the bride has been taken too soon, that all-important role stands empty. That can make even simple details like event set-up an emotional minefield for her daughter — and for the entire family.

“You know it’s going to be an emotional day not having your mom there,” Lee says quietly. “I wanted to be enjoying the morning and relaxing in the bridal suite. I just needed somebody to come and set everything up and take it down so I can enjoy the day.”

Finding that person proved to be a challenge. Even during this period of mourning, Lee had done all the work in advance, like so many brides do. She asked her mother-in-law to step in on the day of the ceremony to handle the tablecloths, napkins and a few other setup details at The Vintage Garden, the charming Barnesville venue where she and Matt married. She got a response many brides and grooms will recognize.

“She looked at me like a deer in headlights,” Lee says with a silvery little laugh. “And I knew what I was asking was a little too much.”

Lee realized that if she needed this service, then other brides certainly did too. And it sparked a memory of a class project back in college. A professor told her to look through Google and see which professions were missing in North Dakota. This quick search revealed that there wasn’t a single wedding planner in the state. Lee and a classmate submitted a mock business plan, complete with a budget and everything they’d need to present to a bank if they ever wanted to make their class project into a viable business.

That project was never intended to become a business. But Lee found herself drawn to the idea. In 2017, Breathe and Relax Events was born in Fargo. Lee and her husband welcomed two more babies, Madelynn and little Garrett. Now Lee soaks up every moment with her kids, shuttling them to dance classes and swimming lessons and teaches brides and grooms how to use their time and resources wisely so they can maximize every moment with their own families.

“I opened up this company on the concept that life is short,” Lee says. “I need to be the support for the bride and groom so they can be with their parents and their wedding party and just breathe and relax on their wedding day.”

Breathe and Relax Events offers a variety of wedding planning options. Lee can step in on the day of the wedding, in the same way she once asked her mother-in-law to step in for her, setting up décor and making sure the day runs smoothly. But more often, she works with couples 8–10 months in advance. Couples can customize a plan that works for them.

“You pay for as much time as you get with me,” Lee explains. “There’s a full wedding package and there’s a micro-package, where you get a couple meetings with me, but you’re making the decisions. And then there’s the ‘day of’ package, where I don’t get involved until 30 days out. The bride’s done all of the work and I’m just making sure that the timelines work out realistically. If there’s an issue, I am the problem solver.”

Planning a wedding requires thousands of tiny, specific choices. Lee guides couples through the planning process, introduces them to reputable, approved vendors and helps take the friction out of the wedding day itself. Breathe and Relax Events works quietly in the background, keeping the focus right where it belongs — on the couple and their family. The peace of mind is priceless.

“Every bride should l have a coordinator as an insurance policy to make sure everything is going well behind the scenes,” Lee says. “Not only does it save you stress, it saves you time picking your vendors, and it can save you money. Wedding planning is nothing but rationalizing where the money should go and figuring out priorities.”

Having an expert involved in the planning process can help brides and grooms determine their top priorities. And having a neutral party on hand can help take some of the emotion out of the discussion, especially when their parents have different priorities.

When brides and grooms are honest about what they want, their wedding becomes a celebration of their unique love story. Some couples budget for a multi-course meal and an open bar, while others skip dinner and the wedding cake and opt for appetizers or food trucks. One bride dreams of flowers draped over every surface. Another wants an allnight dance party with her favorite DJ.

Couples are realizing that they can skip the cookie cutter weddings, break the rules and create a celebration that truly reflects who they are. This kind of joyful customization is a wedding trend Lee hopes is here to stay.

“Thanks to Covid, guests have been reassured it’s okay to invite a smaller circle of friends instead of everyone they know to the wedding,” Lee says. “It’s more about celebrating their day and spoiling those who will be there to support the marriage and not just the party of a wedding. With a smaller guest count, budgets are allowing us planners the option to bring in 12 person bands, food and dessert trucks, lavish decor and florals or even a storybook ending of a horse and carriage ride.”

Each bride’s storybook ending is as unique as she is. Amy Lee and Breathe and Relax Events will help her find it.