Poem for ageing depression

Written by Chloé Allyn

Illustrated by Victoria Decembert

I am the color today of an unmade bed and no, my actual

bed is not left soiled, its hospital corners tucked away but

today I am let go in spirit, let down in capacity, slider halfway

I am a sink full of dishes, no not dishes with bloated rice

and rotting swampy water, I am not a feast for drain flies

no not tombstones but rinsed after dining and left for later

I am today a sewn-up rip, no not just a hole and not a mistake

where perfection was, no, today I am the aftermath, the thread of

a different shade, not lost or ruined or thrown away

I am the gray through the window, the pallid winter sun, I am

the attempt to rise and the audacity to try, I am depression

getting older, I am healing, day one by one.