“The Count Roquefort Case”

a quaint french-style manor just outside of town… honestly, bastian, I don’t like leaving you alone with your sprained ankle! don’t worry about me, marie. the important thing is that you find them and get them here fast! you’re right. I’ll see you soon! take care, marie. and ease your mind… I’ll be fine. besides, my ankle keeps me indoors! what could happen to me here? with my key twice turned, I can be certain that-- oh, no! you! that night… then for cheddar’s sake, lads, keep it down to a dull roar! [yawn! ] the end arrives! aw, phooey! and with this blow, our fight ends! Egad! I am Slain! bravey-o! bravey-issimo! encorey! sorry! three acts left! so how’d ya like the play, gang?! not bad at all, mate… that’s swashbucklin’-- however! it awakens your knightly spirit… that feelin’ of honor an’ loyalty! ya know, like you feel for cheese! fortunately, there are still musket ears… rescue rangers with their hearts in the right places! see that poor ol’ lady, alone at the mercy of vile rabble? she’ll dig our cavaldear vibe! enchantée, maidymoiselle! yeeek!!! oh, myyyy… what?! but I-- our gallant dale means cavalier! more like caval-rear! way to go, dorktagnan! that’s no poor lady! that’s me aunt -- brie marie!

I’ll wake you when it’s over, monty!

…as a sleep aid! I napped like a bloomin’ baby!

[zzz] …whatzat now? izzit over?!

“the three musket ears” ain’t a sleep aid! it’s an epic slushbucklin’ tale!

Soon after… poor lady. dale shocked her silly!

[ she’s coming around! oh me, oh my… recognize me, auntie? it’s monty! monterey jack?! oh, what luck finding you! then you all must be… the rescue rangers! sorry… it was foolish of me to faint in horror. no. it was foolish of dale to be a dope. no! I mean I mistook him for one of… them! who do you mean, ma’am? crikey, auntie marie! there ain’t no blokes around! they’ve shadowed me all evening… but you don’t scare me anymore! you hear?! golly, mrs. brie, come inside! tell us your story in peace! and if you’re hungry, we’ve got some nuts and cheeses in storage! blast! the boss ain’t gonna like this! darn right! this is bad bad… soon, over tea…

“them”? who’s “them”?

I know what I’m talking about, nephew!

[munch! smack! ] this all started when my husband, brocciu bastian, began his “research.” don’t ask me what it was about… he told me little. but either way…

“…my dearest bastian… changed. he’d quietly get up in the dead of night…

“…to rummage through our manor’s library for hours on end!”