Cornell Review XXIX #3 by The Cornell Review

The Cornell Review

An independent Publication

The Conservative Voice on Campus

Vol. XXIX, No. III

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“We

Do Not Apologize.” October 6th, 2010

Kathleen McCaffrey Staff Writer

n September 24, 2010, I had the pleasure of meeting the president of the Czech Republic, Václav Klaus. In the week preceding his arrival, though, my enthusiasm to meet him was met with inquiry as to who he was. Upon finding out that he was the President of a country, my friends and family were very happy that I was going to meet someone important. Indeed, the president of a foreign country is, typically, important. Yet that is not why I was so excited. What is so remarkable about President Klaus, and what served as the source of my excitement, was his staunch commitment to liberty. Klaus, referred to as the “Margaret Thatcher of Central Europe” and the “Milton Friedman of the Czech Republic”, grew up in Czechoslovakia while it was under Soviet rule. He studied economics, which gave him the opportunity to go abroad. In

INSIDE:

More on the Klaus visit

fact, he first became familiar with classical liberalism and Western economics when he studied in Naples, Italy. As a trained economist, Klaus had a steady job with the Czech economic state ministry until 1970, when he was identified as a counterrevolutionary and dismissed. For the next twenty years, he suffered dearly for speaking his mind and worked menial jobs until the Soviet Union began to collapse. After the Velvet Revolution of 1989, Klaus found himself appointed the Minister of Finance of a new Czechoslovakia where he was finally able to apply the lessons he learned from studying classical liberal thinkers. For the past twenty years, President Klaus has been committed to the freedom of which he was deprived for the majority of his life. Amidst the social democratic thought of most Europeans, he firmly stands for bestowing freedom, proliferating a campaign of radical privatization. In a 1990 interview, he

The Q&A session Klaus talks to students

Sunburn

Daily Stun feels 'bullied.'

Please turn to page 6

Welcome to the Commons

The Cornellian's Guide to Downtown Ithaca By Noah Kantro and Alfonse Muglia

said that the new Czech Republic “[wanted] a market economy without any adjectives”. In wake of the financial crisis, I asked if he was still on the right path. Klaus explained to me that, “market without adjectives” was his slogan to represent a recovery from communist ideology. He noted that, in reality it “is not so sharp”. After communism, “[everyone] tried to introduce some elements of the market, some elements of the system. I was the first who criticized [that] way of thinking. ... I said either let’s keep communism or introduce capitalism, that simple. There are many attempts to somehow make it softer, make it

uxuries. Clothes. Dining. Headshops. Welcome to downtown Ithaca, and more specifically the section of East State Street between Aurora and Cayuga Streets known to locals and tourists as “The Commons.” In this two-block pedestrian shopping district at the heart of Ithaca, one can experience the extremes of the city’s culture, and learn why it is all too accurately referred to as “ten square miles surrounded by reality.”

After the conversion of E. State Street into an open pedestrian mall with statues, trees, and picnic areas in 1974, the Commons has developed into one of Tompkins County’s biggest shopping districts and tourist attractions, as well as a gathering spot for locals and college students. “The area is better for tourists,” commented David Abdulky, manager of Mansour Jewelers for the past 30 years. David has seen everything from the frequent use of bad language by loiterers to the recent smoking

prohibitions that have looked to curb the widespread use of drugs in the Commons. What conclusion has David drawn from his experiences? “Locals don’t have a particularly good perception of the Commons.” And that is where our friend Mickey Whittier comes in. Mickey has lived in nearby Newfield his entire life and is now two months into his job at Ameritalia Pizzeria at the heart of the Commons. The pizza shop has become a popular destination for hungry tourists, as well as a hangout for the smokers who have been pushed out of other, smokefree parts of the Commons. For the folks at the restaurant, this creates many more problems than advantages. “I don’t much care for the people doing drugs in the bathroom.” said Mickey. “We have to call the police all Please turn to page 7

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Greek debate grows

The Diversity Diversion

40 Days for Life

Why are you in college?

Other colleges scrutinize their frats

Page 11

Focus on diversity undermines educational principles

Anti-abortion protesters return to Ithaca

Humor page The Review is sick of intolerance.

A piece for the introspective economist.

TOWN OF RICANY

Czech President Václav Klaus Talks Straight with the Review

Approval Issued for Hydrofracking Joseph Bonica News Editor

he contest over hydraulic fracturing, or “hydrofracking”, in the state of New York has been very contentious. State legislators, inspired by environmental special interest groups and reports of accidents that occurred mostly in the southwestern United States, worked towards, and temporarily put, a moratorium on hydrofracking until “further investigation could be done.” One of the major players in this moratorium was Barbara Liftion, the state representative of our own 125th District. This was done in spite of the EPA saying some years ago that hydrofracking is safe and does little damage to the environment (The EPA has since reversed this position and decided that further investigation needs to be done, but few believe the results of the studies will be any different). This refusal to allow gas drilling companies into the state to tap the Marcellus Shale, one of the largest in the U.S., has led to confusion and anger amongst some, citing the immense economic boost such an operation would prove to be. Those who believe in the economic power of hydrofracking have caught a tremendous break in the past couple of weeks. On September Please turn to page 4

Campus

October 6, 2010

Mandatory freshman diversity program amounts to a lesson in good manners Cheryl Cho Staff Writer

apestry of Possibilities. Sound fancy? It certainly did its job by confusing unsuspecting freshmen and tricking them into attending yet another mandatory O-week event. This one, however, was clearly advertised as one of the more significant events since it required students to swipe their cards for attendance. So why all the fuss? Diversity. Of course, the topic of racial slurs and discrimination against minorities is important.There has never been a greater need to be politically correct than in the Cornell of today, which is quite the paradox considering the way teenagers throw around racist jokes that are “all in good fun.” The purpose of Tapestry was “awareness.” Tapestry aimed to spread awareness of diversity, awareness that those around us may not find these jokes funny, and awareness of the serious effect that these jokes can have on students. Relevant and often uncomfortable topics such as homosexuality and stereotyping were brought up during the two-hour meeting as Cornell’s Ordinary People Theatre Troupe performed its controversial skits. The show seemed comical at times, as it was meant to be, but mixing comedy and racism together left students feeling confused. The discussion afterwards epitomized uneasiness. Questions that asked students to discuss their feelings were followed by long periods of silence and darting glances across the room. Comments from students during the discussion included feelings of unease and embarrassment. Many felt that it was difficult to judge whether it was okay to laugh at common stereotypes that teenagers often take as jokes, or whether it was best to keep quiet. While the Troupe’s message to accept one another and simply be mindful of personal differences is an important one, how truly effective was Tapestry at changing students’ behavior? How likely is it that students will really think before they cut out the racial jokes amongst friends? Sadly, the answer is that it’s pretty unlikely. Students will do what they want to doand say what they want to say. No awkward discussions or comical but controversial skits will change that. The truth of the matter is that Tapestry was probably effective for an hour or a few days afterwards, at the most. This is assuming that students even went to the event after all. The timing was off and scheduling was a mess. Students were

It's Not Easy Being Greek New fraternity restrictions draw national attention Michael Alan Staff Writer

s if the voices speaking out against the administration’s proposed restrictions on Greek life, most notably the rule slated to come into effect in 2012 banning freshman from parties where alcohol is being served and the phasing out of alcohol as a part of recruitment and pledging activities, weren’t loud enough, now several of our peer institutions have entered the fray and administrators all over the country have taken notice of Cornell’s aggressive tactics in dealing with underage drinking. In Virginia, the College of William and Mary has made the decision to ban beer pong tables from campus to discourage drinking games. At Princeton, where a Greek system exists alongside the more well-known system of eating houses, the administration currently chooses to not recognize the legitimacy of fraternities and sororities and even goes so far as to send out letters to incoming fresh-

At Princeton, the administration currently chooses to not recognize the legitimacy of fraternities and sororities and even goes so far as to send out letters to incoming freshman urging them not to join a Greek organization.

things that the working group may do is to review lessons learned from other universities.” There is no question that tensions between supporters of the Greek system and the administration are high. But our colleagues in Cambridge seem to have taken a slightly more moderate view. While acknowledg-

drinking-centric focus. New Cornellians, however, think the drinkingcentric stereotype isn’t as prevalent as the administration and others purport it to be. “I don’t feel an overwhelming pressure to drink,” said Dan Wexler ’14. Furthermore, freshmen also report that the presence of upperclassmen brothers and sober

FS.CORNELL.EDU

A Tapestry of Impossiblities

The former home of Pi Kappa Alpha, which was suspended in January after the hospitalization of three underage drinkers

man urging them not to join a Greek organization. According to report in the September 28th issue of The Daily Princetonian, however, this policy is to be revisited with the options of maintaining the status quo, taking a harsher proactive stand against the Greek system, or recognizing the Greek system and working to regulate it. Princeton’s Vice President for Campus Life Cynthia Cherrey is even quoted as saying that “one of the

ing that the proposed rules are “wellintentioned,” The Harvard Crimson notes in their September 13th editorial that, “[the rules] incentivize drinking in secret and in potentially more hazardous environments, where underage drinkers and their peers may not be able to look out for one another, putting lives in danger.” Many who see the contrasting safety standards of a precocious freshman with a handle of Svedka in his dorm room or the closed-door gatherings of the various off-campus fraternity annexes versus the sober monitors, on-campus location, abundant cases of water, and bricks of 4.2% ABV Keystone Light one finds in legitimate fraternity parties understand this view. The Crimson went on to make a key concession to one of the administration’s main gripes with the Greek system, that it has fosters a culture that encourages dangerous levels of alcohol use, the hazing of pledges, and a

monitors makes them feel safer than they normally would in a similar situation. “I know there are people there who know what to do when something goes wrong,” said Zachary Zeno ’14. The mistrust of these safety standards, however, is understandably more widespread amongst administrators who had to deal with the suspension of Cornell’s chapter of Pi Kappa Alpha after the hospitalization of three underage drinkers at a recruitment event in January. Other university publications have also weighed in on the administration’s efforts. The University of Virginia’s Cavalier Daily echoed the sentiments of The Crimson’s editorial in their own September 15th piece, while adding that, “[a more advantageous approach] would be for the individual fraternities and sororities to evaluate their own procedures and events.” Another point that has been brought Please turn to page 10

assigned a specific time slot to go

that they had to make it up, but many

to, one of which directly conflicted

found it not only difficult but also an-

with the 2014 class photo. If students

noying to have to attend a make-up

missed their time slot they were told

session. Moreover, some students just

aren’t interested. They’ve heard the same message again and again from their high school teachers and principals and would opt to tune out. This doesn’t peg Tapestry as a failure: some students out there appreciated the event and took to heart what their classmates had to say. However, Tapestry does rouse the issue of the need to grab students’ attention so that they want to attend events like these that promote positive messages. We’d all agree that students are the most proactive when they’re excited about something. Here’s to hoping that Tapestry wasn’t a waste.

Robert Barker/University Photography

Ordinary People performers talk with the audience

Cheryl Cho a freshman in the College of Arts & Sciences and can be reached at cgc65@cornell.edu.

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meh26@cornell.edu The Cornell Review is an independent biweekly journal published by students of Cornell University for the benefit of students, faculty, administrators, and alumni of the Cornell community. The Cornell Review is a thoughtful review of campus and national politics from a broad conservative perspective. The Cornell Review, an independent student organization located at Cornell University, produced and is responsible for the content of this publication. This publication was not reviewed or approved by, nor does it necessarily express or reflect the policies or opinions of, Cornell University or its designated representatives. The Cornell Review is published by The Ithaca Review, Inc., a non-profit corporation. The opinions stated in The Cornell Review are those of the individual author and do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the editors or the staff of The Cornell Review. Editorial opinions are those of the responsible editor. The opinions herein are not necessarily those of the board of directors, officers, or staff of The Ithaca Review, Inc. The Cornell Review is distributed free, limited to one issue per person, on campus as well as to local businesses in Ithaca. Additional copies beyond the first free issue are available for $1.00 each. The Cornell Review is a member of the Collegiate Network.

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Editorial

October 6, 2010

The Cornell Review: Then and Now L

ast weekend the Review weland sororities on their campuses.” their attention to battling a nationcomed a group of former Perhaps the author’s math was a few wide movement led by far left Editors and Presidents back to camyears off – but nevertheless, quite radicals demanding the freedom of pus to celebrate the 26th year anniprophetic. Philadelphia cop-killer Mumia Abuversary of the paper. In light of this Jamal, filling the editorial pages by While some Review authors disoccasion, we decided to dig up some played a great bit of foresight when chastising those Cornellians who fell old issues from to the ideological pressure of Black covering stories, the 1980s and Panther extremists. Last November, others analyzed 1990s to see the current Review staff exposed an campus events how far we’ve Akwe:kon listserv email supporting that have never come. the very same prisoner. The email even changed at was sent by a Resident Advisor to So how all. One of the much has first editorials on students, encouraging protests on the Review Dennis Shiraev the Review’s blog, Columbus day and linking to a webchanged over Editor-in-Chief Cornell Insider, site advocating the freedom of con26 years? Well, was a freshman’s victed criminals and terrorists. Just as in 1995, tolerance was exhibited in a lot. For one reaction to the all the wrong places. thing the world in which we fight Writing Seminar courses. Freshman for our conservative values has Writing Seminars: Breeding Ground While our Student Assembly rapchanged. In 1984, the world was bifor PC-thinking, it was titled — we’re id-fires many proposals against the polar, and the Evil Empire was alive surprised our colleagues didn’t claim dartboard, few ever hit a bulls-eye. and well. The Cornell conservatives plagiarism. “The writing program Since the early 90’s, our self-governof the 1990s lived in a post commuhas become a hotbed of radicalism ment has failed to move our student nist world — we live in a post 9/11 (PC Prose),” wrote a Review writer culture forward, instead presenting world. in November of 1994. Though it is a resolutions that result from the idle refreshing notion that our paper has minds and unchanging objectives of The campus has changed as well. Back then Cornell Reviews were remained sentient of the University’s short-sighted liberal relativists. The burned with SA of 1993 Is that it, then? Are Cornellians destined to keep fighting about the unsuccessfulmatches; nowadays same issues over and over again, with each new decade bringing a ly pushed for propane a “Resolution new manifestation of an old campus debate? We think not.” lighters are on the weapons most left-wing programs, it is upsetof choice. In 2008 the Review was Multiculturalism” which demanded ting that such topics fail to fall off accused of publishing racially insenspecial recognition of groups that the map. sitive articles, but in 1995 it was the were subjected to oppression and The Review’s most frequently apCornell Daily Sun that took flak for contemptuous ridicule by U.S. culpearing topic of dissent is an obvipublishing a racist cartoon of O.J ture. Our decade’s offshoot of this ous one: Cornell’s Program Houses. Simpson. For displays of liberal luwas of course Resolution 44, an antiA residential area that divides stunacy on campus we used to give out discrimination proposal that incited dents by the color of their skin is the Bozo of the Month Award; now a fiery campus-wide debate that pitthe most self-defeating and poorly we have an occasional Ass Clown ted idealists against realists. Just as implemented idea in the history of feature in the back of the paper. 1993’s resolution collapsed, so did self-defeating Breaking the 2010’s — a clear testament to the SA’s ideas. While the mainstream progressive agenda and losing streak PH’s today have failure to motivate practical thought against Harvard not maintained was once a big among the student body. quite the same deal, but lately Is that it, then? Are Cornellians breed of extrem- destined to keep fighting about the we’ve been clobism that evolved same issues over and over again, bering them at tandem with Lynah. with each new decade bringing a Oliver Renick in their creation But there are new manifestation of an old campus Executive Editor after the 1969 many more pardebate? We think not. Times have Willard Straight changed. The conservative voice on allels between takeover, the Review has neverthenow and then. Looking back at the campus is stronger than ever, and the less stood as the sole protesting voice continuity of these issues and the old Reviews, many of the campus isagainst a backwards solution to an sues that made the front page seem continued failure of repeated liberal outdated problem. Every volume like a portal to the future. As we initiatives are a testament to our speak, the student body at Cornell is of the Review has dedicated articles, resolve. Liberals stand to gain from pages, and of course the occasional reeling from a proposed renovation this brief history of the Review by humor piece, to providing an alterof the Greek fraternity system. This understanding that their ideas and native viewpoint to these race-based past September’s issue of The Review proposals are merely new exhibitions dormitories. When the voice of covered the potential impact of the of outdated liberal objectives. But Program Houses rose for the institu- history suggests that they will not. proposed Greek changes that would tion of more segregated dorms, the crack down on frat boozing and imWe’ll be here. public burning of Cornell Review pose stricter enforcement of underDennis Shiraev is a junior in the copies, and the support for controage drinking laws. The December College of Arts & Sciences. He may be versial figures such as Mumia Abuissue of 1996 has a lead story titled reached at des255@cornell.edu. Jamal, the Review’s editorial page The Future of the Greeks whose first Oliver Renick is a junior in the sentence reads: “Every ten years or so was there to return the rationality of College of Engineering. He may be speech to a reasonable state. in the United States, college adminreached at ojr5@cornell.edu. istrations suppress the fraternities In 1995, Review writers turned

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October 6, 2010

Campus

The Downfall of Diversity in Higher Education S

tudents have been told time and again of the importance and value of diversity in everyday life, especially in the marketplace of ideas that is higher education. At Cornell, these ideas have coalesced into presentations like Tapestry and the development of entire departments devoted to espousing the idyllic tenets of multiculturalism. But just how

Universities shows that despite an overwhelming belief amongst both students and faculty that college campuses should facilitate a tolerant environment for diverse viewpoints, few feel that this is the reality. According to the study, the majority of students (58.4%) and faculty (77.3%) felt that a major goal of college should be to foster an open-minded worldview and to ensure that students seriously consider others' perspectives in matters where they may hold conflicting

At a University Diversity Council talk, students satiate their irresistible desire to discuss the subject.

have these visions of acceptance and tolerance really played out in universities and colleges across America? How have these tenants manifested themselves in our everyday student lives? A recent report by the Association of American Colleges and

Jason Koski/University Photography

Christopher Slijk Staff Writer

opinions. Yet of this group only half of students and two-fifths of faculty believed that their school was making a legitimate commitment to promote such an environment. Moreover, the gap between “should be” and “is” amongst students seems to widen with every passing year, with only

25% of seniors agreeing compared to 40% of freshmen. Turning to personal perspectives, the report found that two-thirds of incoming freshmen tend to feel that they enter college already having a respectful view towards others' opinions. But their mentors don't seem to think so: only 7% of faculty believed that students come to college with an open mind towards foreign views. This gap narrowed somewhat when comparing experiences during and after college, with 45% of faculty and 55% of students feeling that they had been successfully enlightened in the ways of non-judgmental progressivism. What does this all mean? Well, aside from the irony of forcing pupils into a mindset of open-mindedness being lost upon faculty and administrators, it would seem that colleges have largely shifted their focus: rather than give students an academic education based on factual knowledge, many universities have seemingly elected to train a generation of automatons who accept whatever ideas come their way and lack any solid convictions of their own. Moreover, the statistics indicate that this has failed to work and in some ways has backfired, with some students in fact clinging more closely to their respective ethnic or intellectual circles while shunning anything from the outside. The report, biased as it was, even pointed out that minority political views, particularly conservative viewpoints, are not seen as safe to express openly, with one professor commenting that “many on this campus cannot tolerate any opinion

other than the liberal viewpoint.” To those with common sense it comes as little surprise that spotlighting students’ differences is not the best way to make them feel more closely connected to their diverse peers, but for many others an artificial appreciation

Rather than give students an education based on factual knowledge, many universities have seemingly elected to train a generation of automatons who lack any solid convictions of their own. for diversity via constant forced reminders seems to be good enough. Perhaps more interesting than the findings is the implied belief that higher education should be re-tooled to control the social development of students. One suggestion by an education analyst suggests that "...society must give new priority to a set of educational outcomes that all students need from higher learning.” Have we students really been reduced to nothing but the product of “educational outcomes” in the eyes of today’s educators? Willingness to hear other perspectives is certainly a cornerstone in promoting intellectual discourse, but to suggest that students must be steered towards this “correct” mentality for the good of society seems dismissive of our own abilities to think Please turn to page 10

Hydrofracking Set to Begin in Nearby Ostego 21, PenEnergy, a major news source for energy companies around the country, reported that the New York State Department of Environmental Conservation has given the green light to Gastem USA to drill into the Marcellus Shale section located in Ostego County, just northeast of Ithaca. This section of the well, known as the Ross-1 Well, is estimated to have somewhere in the neighborhood of 145 billion cubic feet/sq mile of natural gas. With the intensity on both sides of the hydrofracking debate, it is interesting to see that the NYDEC has decided to issue this permit. Certainly, this is a victory for those in support of gas extraction. Of course, it will be some time before a drill is actually built; Gastem still has to test the area to see if it is to their liking. The issuance of the permit, however, is symbolic; clearly, the NYDEC recognizes hydrofracking as a positive, job-creating force that will safely supply alternative energy. So far, there have been no reported conflicts regarding the potential drilling

ANTHONY LONGO

Continued from the first page

in the area, but this can change at any time. How well the hydrofracking experiment goes in Ostego County will be crucial in determining the future of the gas industry in the state. Economic success, paired with minimal environmental damage, could force many legislators to reconsider their

original positions against the practice. Any sort of accident, however, no matter how small or large, will likely reinvigorate negative attitudes towards gas extractions. If hydrofracking is expanded, it will be interesting to see Ithaca's reaction if Tompkins County’s portion of the shale is allowed to be drilled in the near future. Sentiments against it would likely

be very inflamed, but hopefully cool heads prevail and a sorely needed economic boost is given to the region. Joseph Bonica is a junior in the College of Agriculture & Life Sciences and can be reached at jmb582@cornell.edu. Pick up our next issue for his rap "Frack the Shale."

Campus

October 6, 2010

ast Saturday, about 15 pro-life demonstrators gathered outside the Ithaca Planned Parenthood to protest abortion. They came carrying signs reading, “Women do regret abortion” and “Men regret lost fatherhood”. Some of the demonstrators hailed from Cornell and the Ithaca area, while others came from further away. They were all united in a common purpose: to be a witness to the preborn and to help women facing unplanned pregnancies. The protestors are part of 40 Days for Life, a national organization that seeks to end abortion by peaceful means. The organization coordinates pro-life activists to conduct prayer vigils and protests between September 22 and October 31 at abortion mills across the country. Why did the organizers in Ithaca decide to demonstrate outside of Planned Parenthood? “Planned Parenthood is where the [child] killings take place,” organizer Shea Hasenhauer says. “They have a history of perpetrating these killings, and . . . they’re trying especially to reach out to college students,”

said Hasenhauer, a sophomore in the ILR school. Last spring, the protests became a routine occurrence at Planned Parenthood. Every Saturday morning at 10:00, a group of demonstrators would meet in Immaculate Conception Catholic Church to pray for the success of their protest. Then, led by Brother Carmine Funaro of the Capuchin Friars, they would head over to the Planned Parenthood to pray and sing hymns. They would stand across the street from the Planned

“They have a history of perpetrating these killings, and . . . they’re trying especially to reach out to college students” Parenthood building, behind protective yellow barriers that the police department had set up the night before. The sound of their voices could be heard across the street, where more volunteers stood to counsel women

SAM PELL

Sam Pell Staff Writer

SAM PELL

For the Preborn and their Mothers: “40 Days for Life” Returns to Ithaca

40 Days for Life demonstrators protested outside Planned Parenthood in Ithaca.

going in and out of the Planned Parenthood. Last spring’s campaign did not go unnoticed by Planned Parenthood. Some of their employees stood outside to escort women into their facilities. They even wrote an article in their newsletter about the campaign. It reports: “We’ve seen many more protesters this spring than in previous years . . . The protests are generally ‘peaceful’ as they claim, but some of our patients tell us that they feel harassed by the 40 Days crowd.” The “40 Days crowd,” on the other hand, insists that their aim is to help women in need and not to harass anyone.

This year the campaign tried to attract a broader base of people to participate. Organizers recruited members from organizations such as the Cornell Republicans, the Cornell Coalition for Life, and Campus on a Hill, as well as many churches in the Ithaca area. Each group was encouraged to “adopt” several hours a week, when their members would go down to the Planned Parenthood and hold a vigil. So far, the Cornell Republicans have adopted Wednesdays from 1 to 3 PM and the Cornell Coalition for life has adopted Fridays from 2 to 4. The fall campaign kicked off last Saturday with a strong turn-out. Please turn to page 10

Candyland, which first occurred in 2005, is a children’s carnival HALO hosts each year at a local grade school. A Painted Gala, HALO’s premier event of the year, is a charity art auction featuring student and other artwork. Halpin called this event her favorite of HALO’s projects, noting, “Each year we raise a lot of money for our featured charity, which can really help that organization. Everyone really rises to the occasion and the artwork is always fabulous.” The event also showcases musical performers and is run by a professional auctioneer. A date has not yet been chosen for this year’s auction, but its proceeds will go to the Greater Ithaca Activities Center children’s programs.

On the whole, HALO offers Cornellians an opportunity to get involved in their community at both a global and local level, and to maintain balanced lives. Halpin commented that HALO has this effect on her life, and believes, “It is so easy both at Cornell and at other institutions of higher learning to become so wrapped up in your own world of problem sets, prelims, and papers, that you forget there is a whole big world out there.…HALO reminds me of the millions and millions of people that are not as lucky as me.” Further, Halpin elaborated, “HALO has taught me that we have a plethora of resources at our fingertips; why not use them to do good, to help save a life?” Please turn to page 10

Cornellians Give Back Lucia Rafanelli / Staff Writer Greg Stein / Staff Writer

ith prelim season in full swing, it is at times easy to get caught up in our personal problems and forget to give back to the communities surrounding us. There is at least one group of Cornell students, though, who have not forgotten the importance of this. They are the members of the Help a Life Organization (HALO). HALO is a studentrun, campus-based charitable organization that was founded in 2002 by a group of Cornellians who hoped to have the opportunity to help save a life before graduating. Over the years, HALO has put on a number of events and donated to multiple charities, all in an effort to help children in need, both locally and around the globe. The founders started the organization in order to promote the health and wellbeing of children and infants. They believed that children, as the leaders of future generations, are valuable sources of future innovation and progress, and so should be nurtured and protected in the present. HALO’s vice president of publicity and marketing, Katie Halpin, said

her commitment to the organization is based on the idea that “[t]his is not an easy world to grow up in and I think that brightening a child’s life, even if just for a day, can really make a difference.” Among HALO’s most notable achievements is its recent donation of neonatal equipment to Cayuga Medical Center. HALO’s series of donations resulted in the center being raised to Level II status, thus allowing it to care for prematurely born infants and infants with birth defects. Additionally, HALO has raised over $25,000 for medical equipment to be donated to treatment centers around the world. In the past, HALO has also handmade baby blankets that were delivered to locations as close as Cayuga Medical Center and as remote as villages in Vietnam and Bangladesh. Additionally, the organization publishes and distributes a brochure containing information about raising premature babies. The brochure, entitled Baby Smarts, is available at Cayuga Medical Center. Perhaps HALO’s most involved and largest projects are “Candyland” and “A Painted Gala”, both of which are events HALO puts on annually.

HALO

Local children benefit from Help a Life Organization

Campus

October 6, 2010

Klaus Escaped from Communism to Cornell, Found Communists. Forty Years Later, Greeted by More Communists Brendan patrick Devine Campus News Editor

BEHINDTHEKIT.COM

hen Václav Klaus, now President of the Czech Republic, studied at Cornell, he “came to a country where students are supposed to study and professors to teach,” a country “not controlled by the omnipotence of politics,” but he did not find it. “I came to the country of Bob Dylan and flower children” and SDS. The year was 1969. Klaus intended to work as a teaching assistant in the Economics department and to

“understand this great and uncritically admired country.” Instead, Klaus was forced to watch a gang of kids armed with cheap hunting rifles invade Willard-Straight Hall and force unwarranted changes to the University at the muzzle of a gun. “I had the feeling it was not much quieter here than at Prague,” said Klaus. “The arguments used by the radical students here sounded quite familiar.” Klaus did not dissipate his stay at Cornell watching career miscreants and the New Left pillage the University. Klaus dedicated most of his time

Review Interviews President Klaus Continued from page 1 weaker: not just ‘market economy,’ but ‘social market economy,’ ‘ecological market economy’ ... All of those elements [and adjectives] were disqualifying”. Despite his understanding of economics, he does not look at freedom as a tool to some other end. President Klaus is committed to retaining a ‘free market’, since, in light of his experiences with planned economies, he considers it a humane option; not just a means to a higher GDP. A majority of the students President Klaus encountered that Friday asked him policy-oriented questions. His views are far from the norm in Europe; he opposes a collective ‘European Union’ and is skeptical of measures to regulate human activity in the name of global warming. Yet it seems that many of the people who inquired about this were missing his point. President Klaus lived under a regime that atrophied the powers of individual reason and, instead, used the state to plan a society in the name of a

“common good.” As he explained in 2009, “Communism was a utopia to mastermind human society. Current efforts to fight the crisis, to fight climate, to artificially unify Europe belong to the same category.” He

“It became fashionable to believe in the omnipotence of the government and of masterminding the economy and whole society from above. It’s something [Czechs] experienced for decades in the communist country.” has seen ‘rational planning’ go awry and, ultimately, puts a premium on human choice over government collectivism, regardless of the cost to his popularity.

and exertions to reading in the library and absorbing volumes of knowledge and opinion on economic thought. At this juncture of time Keynes was not yet dead, and Friedman was not quite in vogue. Klaus, anticipating a trend in economic thought that would not materialize until the next decade, became a confirmed Monetarist: “I was firmly, ideologically, on the Right.” Upon returning to Prague, Klaus met the disparagements and shuns and the neglects that so often accompanied capitalist thinkers in Cold War Eastern Europe. The Party dismissed him from the Institute of Economics after labeling him the “leading non-Marxist economist” in the country, a title Klaus found flattering. After the dissolution of the Soviet veil over Europe, Klaus presided over the economic growth of the new Czech Republic. The fledgling Republic joined the European Union and the North Atlantic Treaty powers in hopes of becoming “a normal European country again.” Klaus is ambivalent as to whether or not these aspirations have been met. The sudden advent and similarly sharp fall of the European super-state, Klaus believes, has put too many countries under the aegis of a convoluted central authority, an authority that has enforced a “European model of an over-regulated welfare state.” Klaus maintains that he is not anti-European, but instead prefers “inter-governmentalism” to the super-state. During the Question and Answer session with the audience Klaus put several upstart, opportunistic, and downright obnoxious enquirers in their proper place. A Hotel student from France posed the question: What are the hapless nations of Europe to do without the Union? Klaus promptly reminded the student that he was French, and that no one from a respectable country would dare ask such a question. Klaus further elaborated on the shortcomings on the European Union, noting that the EU helped “hide the debt problems in individual countries,” like Greece. These nations should have been punished but were sustained by the Union. The discussion mostly revolved around questions derived by students who researched Klaus’s Wikipedia

page prior to attending his lecture, but not all trips to the microphone ended in banality. One student from the upper-deck of the Statler auditorium queried as to what sort of fun Klaus had here? Did he go to Slope Day? While he “tried to study” he “really enjoyed skiing on the Greek Peak.” The most sincere student interaction with the Eastern European leader came from Ray Mensah, vicepresident of the S.A. and friend to all conservatives on camps. Mensah

Earlier in the week, President Klaus had made a speech at Johns Hopkins. In his concluding remarks there he said that there was a need to “reformulate the case for capitalism”. I asked him for a piece of advice as someone who has staunch-free market views that are currently out of favor in wake of the financial crisis. While he could have regurgitated lines from Hayek, Mises, or Friedman about market principles and liberty, President Klaus instead gave advice useful to those who may even appreciate markets with adjectives. “It became fashionable to believe in the omnipotence of the

government and of masterminding the economy and whole society from above. It’s something [Czechs] experienced for decades in the communist country, so we are oversensitive to those issues. So what I would recommend to young people [in America] is to have open eyes. To listen [....] to think twice about [what they are told.]” He still laughed when I handed him a 100 trillion Zimbabwean dollar bill, though.

KERRYWAGHORN.COM

thanked Klaus for taking very bold positions on “climate change and other issues” that the majority of Western leaders shy from. Questions pertaining to economic topics poured from the balcony and flooded from the aisles. Some were warranted: why did Klaus, a devout opponent of the European Union, sign the Treaty of Lisbon? “There is no way of being out of the overall European integration process,” responded Klaus. “The ‘Back to Europe’ slogan meant to some being absorbed into Europe.” The Treaty of Lisbon eventually took root; “It works, but I don’t think very successfully.” However, further caterwauling over the Treaty will do the Czech Republic no service: Please turn to page 10

Kathleen McCaffrey is a junior in Arts and Sciences and can be reached at kam424@cornell.edu.

Campus

October 6, 2010

The Cornellian's Guide to Downtown Ithaca Continued from page 1

ITHACA NIGHT LIFE

the time.” He was only too happy to describe his disgust and frustration with the frequently hushed drug culture that pervades the atmosphere in the Commons.

After a day in the Commons, the average Cornellian can form his or her own opinion about what this “stuff” is that David was so hesitant to discuss, just as locals and lawmakers have.

The Commons in 1901 – more horses, less cannabis.

Perhaps the best evidence of Ithaca’s thriving drug scene can be found in its head-shops. One store down from Ameritalia Pizzeria is 3-D Light, which sells an assortment of “smoking” accessories, weapons, bumper stickers, and out-of-the-ordinary home decorations. Manager David Pargh said that the family-owned business has been in the Commons for over twenty years. The shop’s business, ironically enough, booms around the time that students are returning to school in the late summer. Pargh, however, tiptoed around the drug problem lamented by the pizza shop employees, limiting his description of what he sees as problems in the Commons to the fights he sees break out sometimes, while admitting that there is “some stuff I can’t really talk about.”

The Cornell Review

“I thought you were here to ask about the smoking,” interrupted a coworker of our friend Mickey when we introduced ourselves as journalists from Cornell. “The same people I saw here as a teenager 10 years ago are still around all the time,” added Mickey, leading to another problem he sees with the Commons: homelessness. “Every day this guy washes his hair in the bathroom,” he described, “but realistically, I don’t think these are things that can be changed.” History appears to have proved Mickey right on this one. Aside from the recent smokingban in a concentrated area, little has been done to address these issues, but the area is still thought of by business owners and politicians as an ideal tourist attraction and the “cultural” center of the town, which may

have been the reason the Tompkins County Democratic Committee has chosen to set up shop right smack in the middle of the Commons. This reputation as the artistic and cultural hub of Ithaca has been gained in part through the public artwork which has taken over the open, tree-lined mall, such as giant multicolored mushrooms made of plastic shopping bags or a metal ribbon running through the trees creatively decorated with a decades-old layer of bird droppings. Beneath these displays street performers can often be found, ranging from old bearded guitarists picking out tunes and humming along, to boisterous public exercise classes where hip-hop blasts out of a boom box and can be heard for blocks in every direction. Indeed there is something to be found for every alternative lifestyle in the Commons, whether it be artsy, liberal, or downright scary, such as can be found in the imposingly-named Ithaca Body Modification Station.

Nevertheless, business is booming. “The stores work as a result of the nice place that [the Commons] is,” added David Abdulky, the jewelry store manager. “It’s a nice, peaceful, laid-back territory, and besides, there is zero crime.” As the days become shorter and the Commons’ trees begin to lose their leaves, Cornellians new and old should take the time to hop on their favorite bus route, head down the big hill, and explore everything the city of Ithaca has to offer. On your journey downtown, might we suggest buying a bumper sticker that accurately sums up the history of the Commons? Perhaps the Commons have failed to become what they were intended to be back in 1974. Perhaps they have evolved beyond that intention. In either case, downtown Ithaca has been able to appeal to a diverse group of people and everyone from politicians to stoners can call it home. We recommend a particular bumper sticker featured at 3-D Lights: “If at first you don’t succeed, redefine success.” Noah Kantro is a freshman in the School of Engineering. He can be reached at nk366@cornell.edu. Alfonse Muglia is a freshman in the School of Industrial & Labor Relations. He can be reached at arm267@cornell. edu.

SHORPY

Natives block the road to the dismay of bus drivers.

October 6, 2010

Nation

CORNELLINSIDER.com

a blog by the writers of the Cornell Review

Please Hold for the President

By OLIVER RENICK

President Obama got on the phone this afternoon with several college students in a publicly-broadcast conference call, where he fielded questions from student journalists. His objective was relatively simple – garner support for health care initiatives that allow students to remain on their parents’ plans until they are 26, and encourage young people to take part in the upcoming midterm elections. “I want to remind young people they have to get reengaged in this process and vote in these midterm elections,” he told one caller. It sounds as if Mr. Obama, who received widespread youth support in 2008, may be realizing the fickle tendencies of the youth. Obama credited health care costs for the hardships of graduating college students, saying “if I keep increasing pell grants and college funding but health care keeps going up and inflation of tuition prices rises, we’re right back to where we started.” The president also recounted the good ol’ days of his college years. “When i was going to college food at the cafeteria was notoriously bad – we didn’t have a lot of options, we used to joke about what was for lunch that day. There was a lot of nondescript stuff that wasn't edible. We need to ask, what can we do to make universities more cost effective? There should be pie charts at every university that show you where every dollar your spending is going.” Bold words for a Harvard man.

Incumbent Dems Distance Themselves from Obama According to a September 12th New York Times article, with a critical midterm election cycle approaching, a number of Democratic candidates for national offices are attempting to distance themselves from their party and its recent legislative actions. Rather than riding President Obama’s coattails, it seems Democrats are marketing themselves as the renegades (or mavericks, if you will) of their party. For instance, Democratic House Representatives Mark Schauer, Suzanne M. Kosmas, and Glenn Nye all ran campaign ads in which they criticized the status quo in Washington, the latter explicitly stating “‘I stood up to my party leaders and voted no.’” It is worth noting that this strategic distancing is taking place as Republican candidates and groups run significant numbers of advertisements criticizing current “Washington insiders,” namely President Obama and Nancy Pelosi. This is likely more than just political coincidence. Both parties appear to sense a general dissatisfaction with the current state

of national politics. Further, both are trying to capitalize on it– Republicans by drawing the public’s attention to the undesirable consequences of two years of Democratic political control, and Democrats by dissociating themselves with the political mechanism that produced these consequences. This dynamic is strikingly similar to that which dominated the national political scene in the time surrounding the 2008 presidential elections. After eight years of the Bush presidency, Democrats insisted on an urgent need for new leadership, while Republicans looked to endorse “political outsiders” who could not be blamed for the Bush-era policies the American public found so unsatisfactory. Interestingly enough, it has only taken President Obama two years to reach an analagous– if less extreme– state of political exile in his own party, and this begs the question, “How will Democrats view his administration come the 2012 elections, and how eager will they be to put their full support behind his reelection?”

cornellinsider.com

By LUCIA RAFANELLI

Reflections

By John Farragut

WSJ

To keep life in perspective, there’s a quip made by Don Draper of AMC’s Mad Men that I like to keep in mind: “Young people don't know anything...especially that they're young.” The quote is an undeniable truth for me. We attend one of the premier universities in the country. We are taught by some of the brightest minds in the country. We know so much more now than we did four years ago, when we arrived far above Cayuga’s waters. It’s hard for the ego not to take over. But what is it that we actually know? After the prelims and papers and problem sets are turned in and graded, the real world looms. It’s not neatly organized in a bow-topped box. There are questions but no answers. What was the point of these four years, not to mention that cool two hundred grand? A liberal arts education, regardless of field, teaches us to systematically analyze. We learn to think and observe with nuance and subtlety; it’s a skill which makes everything from religious observation to consumption of popular culture more rewarding than it would be otherwise. Not only can we revel in the unabashed hedonism in that favorite Ke$ha lyric (my guiltiest of pleasures), but how about those alliterative slant rhymes? All of life becomes richer. Taken to its caricatured extreme, we get President Obama’s position on your favorite issue of the day: “Nuanced”. Yet we learn nothing which can’t be taught, and for many, this is the knowledge most likely to lead to a fulfilling life. The only way to run a successful small business is to first run a small business. Tricks of the trade so often are idiosyncratic that they can only be learned by trial and error. It’s not at all obvious how to apply even

something as “relevant” as what’s taught in an economics course: where was that production function again…? The most successful businessmen have learned by doing. Higher education replaces what could have been four years of doing. The left often talks about a college education as a necessity, a right. And

We overinvested in technology in the late nineties, and Pets.com came crashing down. We overinvested in housing throughout this decade, and nothing need be said about where we are now. We are still overinvesting in higher education, and eventually this party too will end. in today’s world, with over 70% of high school graduates attending an institution of higher learning, it certainly increases the chances of professional success. But not for what is learned in college—for much of the country, it’s purely a signaling game. We forgo $200,000 and four years of earnings to let employers know that we’re smart enough to work for them. (This doesn’t apply to the pre- majors—pre-med, pre-law, etc.— where course content is directly applicable to career.) That’s not very efficient, when standardized test scores or high school grades could just as well convey similar information at significantly lower cost. Yet as long as everyone else has a B.A. on their résumé, there’s no question that not having one is a significant disadvantage in a large number of professions. Although the current trajectory doesn’t suggest it, the bubble will eventually burst. We overinvested in technology in the late nineties,

Learning From Obama in Illinois: Let's Not Elect Another Opportunistic Neophyte Cornell grad Mark Kirk leading race for Obama senate seat Karim Lakhani Staff Writer

t’s now crunch time in the race for Barack Obama’s old Senate seat. According to the latest Rasmussen poll, Mark Kirk, a Cornell graduate from ‘81 and the Republican nominee, now clings to a three percent lead over his opponent,Democrat candidate Alexi Giannoulias. Depending on the final month of campaigning, this race can turn in favor of either candidate.

for Giannoulias. This symmetry prompted me to ask: what lessons have we learned from the election and presidency of Barack Obama that may help us avoid repeating the mistake we did in 2008? 1. Experience Matters The last two years have shown how unaccustomed and inexperienced Obama is to the intricacies of the law making process, forcing him to constantly work outside the system, instead of within

Chicagobreakingnews.com

For Those Who Think Young

October 6, 2010

Above: Obama and Giannoulias. Below: Kirk and McCain.

The race for this important Senate seat has brought numerous noteworthy endorsements, including Senator John McCain for Kirk and President Obama and Pets.com came crashing down. We overinvested in housing throughout this decade, and nothing need be said about where we are now. We are still overinvesting in higher education (a significant portion—though not all—coming from government subsidies), and eventually this party too will end. It may seem like a pessimistic, sterile view to think of college solely as an investment. Why treat college with such cynicism when my four years at Cornell have been the most rewarding four years of my life? Unfortunately, reality is a cynical thing, and demands we each make our own living. Plus, I’m too young to know that anything could be better than Cornell. John Farragut is a senior in the College of Arts & Sciences. He may be reached at jdf222@cornell.edu.

it. In the Illinois Senatorial race, we are faced with the same debate we faced in the 2008 election: how much does experience matter? Will we elect Kirk, a five term congressman who has proven himself,or Giannoulias, a first term treasurer with no substantial government experience whatsoever? 2. Managing Money The country’s increasing debt and lack of growth speak to failing, money-wasting, and job-killing programs introduced by President Obama and the Democrats in Congress. Giannoulias supports these programs, along with the taxation needed to pay for them. His risky and irresponsible decisions drove his family’s bank (Broadway Bank) to the ground (and this says nothing of his other business practices, such aslending millions of dollars to convicted mobsters). What will he do with our money? Kirk, on the other hand, offers fiscal responsibility through spending less, taxing less, and borrowing less. 3. Size of Government Please turn to page 10

Odds and Ends

October 6, 2010

Sunburned By Kathleen McCaffrey and Oliver Renick

The Tony Manfred ‘10

ASSCLOWN AWARD

It’s tough out there for a journalist! Or at least the Daily Stun wants it to be. Because when it comes to breaking stories, The Stun is quite the scoop-Nazi. In a rather strange exhibition of puerility, Cornell’s trusted news source refused to provide a Review writer with notes from an interview after she had agreed to share audio recording with another journalist from the Stun. While it is not The Review‘s MO to take jabs at competing papers, its mission is to illuminate hostility towards conservatives on campus, and expose those institutions which aim to silence the minority voice. In this aspect, The Stun is a front-runner. When Review writer Kathleen McCaffrey’s recorder didn’t work before an interview last week with Czech president Václav Klaus, a Sun reporter kindly agreed to send her the audio from his own device after the interview. He even suggested that he might print the full transcript in the paper. Surprised by such professionalism shown between the two, an administrator overseeing the event said, “Wow, how nice of you two to work together.” But the professionalism was shortlived, as the Stun’s managing editor instructed his reporter to withhold the information. He even refused to provide President Klaus’s quotes that

were in response to McCaffrey’s direct questions, citing a long-term policy that doesn’t allow sharing of unpublished information. “I’ve never heard of any such rule,” one long-time Stun staff member told The Review – perhaps he insisted anonymity for fear of receiving a ‘time-out.’ In typical fashion, The Stun, shielded under the guise of self-proclaimed neutrality, was in fact operating under a strict policy of discrimination. While the paper offered to assess the correctness of quotes if McCaffrey tried guessing what was said, it insisted upon standing by the eternal policy of withholding information. When asked to recall a recent implementation of this rule, however, the editor stumbled, only able to recount a time where information was indeed passed on upon request. Nevertheless, the Review‘s request for

help from another professional was denied. “From how The Review writes about us, I don’t think we have that professional relationship. I mean come on, you call us The Daily Stun,” the managing editor said to The Review over the phone. “Frankly, a lot of people on our staff don’t like the way we’re treated in your newspaper [and online],” he continued, affirming suspicions that the request for information was denied for personal reasons. “It’s like, why would you give your notes to the kid in class that’s a bully?” Well it’s always good to know we’re reaching our audience. Thankfully,

the article on President Klaus has been published in full this week, despite The Stun's efforts. As it turns out, the President’s aid willingly handed over the audio from the meeting over a week later. Congratulations to Cornell’s flagship daily paper for having a more iron-clad privacy policy than the Czech Republic. Stunning? What has The Assclown taught you? 1. It never hurts to make polite conversation and exchange business cards. 2. For professionalism, look away from The Sun.

Illinois race

Greeks

Charity

Abortion

Continued from page 2

Continued from page 5

into the debate has been the idea that the Greek system should have self-policed itself better in order to preempt these actions by the administration. The Cavalier summed up this view in a way that recognizes the value of the Greek system but also the legitimacy of some of the administration’s issues, stating, “Fraternities and sororities foster values like maturity and independence in their members when they function more or less autonomously. But such a privilege is best preserved if the University is given no compelling reason to intervene.”

HALO’s general body meetings are held every Monday at 4:30 in Goldwin Smith Hall 162, and are open to all those interested in getting involved with the organization or in donating items for sale at A Painted Gala. Greg Stein is a sophomore in the College of Engineering and can be reached at gjs58@cornell.edu. Lucia Rafanelli is a sophomore in the College of Arts & Sciences. She may be reached at lmr93@cornell.edu.

Continued from page 9 Instead of expanding private industry, Giannoulias—similar to President Obama and Democrats in Congress—looks to grow the size of government. Whether it’s killing private sector jobs through irresponsible healthcare reform or further regulations, Giannoulias is looking to expand the power of the government, a tactic that only hurts the people it is intended to help. This Senate race looks like it will end without a formal debate. In spite of Kirk’s seven debate and forum requests, Giannoulias will not take the stand to defend his positions. Instead, Giannoulias sticks to dirty and untruthful TV advertisements. Unfortunately for him, Giannoulias’ remarkable charm and good looks cannot cover up the fact that Mark Kirk is the best candidate in this race. Kirk offers experience, strength, and well needed reform to Washington that Giannoulias is simply not capable of offering. What will the people of Illinois decide? Will we learn from the last two years, or will we make the same mistake again. Karim Lakhani is a freshman in the School of Hotel Administration. He can be reached at kml248@ cornell.edu.

October 2010

Michael J. Stratford

Michael Alan is a freshman in the ILR school and can be reached at mja93@cornell.edu.

Diversity Continued from page 4 critically and reflect rationally upon our views. Are we not individuals, fully capable of formulating our own beliefs and making our own choices? Or are we just cogs in the machine, expected to passively accept every alterative view regardless of the merit it holds? Christopher Slijk is a junior in theSchool of Arts & Sciences He can bereached at cps95@cornell.edu.

Approx. size of the Review

NASA SDO

Managing Editor The Cornell Daily Sun

Many of the organizers from the last campaign were there, but there were some new faces in the mix as well. One married couple heard about the campaign from its website and travelled all the way from Seneca Falls to participate. They brought their five small children along with them: two were old enough to hold home-made signs, two sat in a wagon pulled by their mother, and one participated as best he could inside his mother’s womb. The children’s presence boosted everyone’s morale. “I was so excited when I saw them pull up,” said participant Maria Magaldi, a sophomore Continued from page 6 “No use going on a hunger strike” in CALS. The campaign has been underway over the matter. The final question came from a stu- for a week and continues to grow. dent in the audience: Is freedom not Several local churches are working to a bad thing? Does it not allow people adopt a time slot, and individuals are to make choices that they are simply scheduling informal vigils during the not wise enough to make? How does week. The participants eagerly await one use freedom for the good? Klaus October 19, when 40 Days for Life coeducated the student with a few short founder Shawn Carney will come to but incisive comments: “The question Cornell to speak to them. Meanwhile, is wrong… freedom is yours. Don’t the organizers are working hard to speak about ‘using freedom’…The Communists wanted to ‘use markets’. spread the word about the campaign. You can’t ‘use markets’, you can only But campaign coordinator Mary let them function... I am happy that Anne Tissot is not overwhelmed. I am free to choose.” This response “The Lord is preparing many hearts and we need to be ready,” she says. brought down the house. Sam Pell is a sophomore in the ColBrendan Patrick Devine is a junior in the College of Arts and Sciences.He can lege of Arts &Sciences. He can be reached be contacted at bpd8@cornell.edu. at sep87@cornell.edu.

Klaus

Humor

October 6, 2010

SERIOUSly concerned OPINION PIECE

Intolerance: A Global Epidemic By Tianye Liu and Anthony Longo

never thought intolerance was a serious issue. So what if different groups cannot get along with each other? One day this past summer, I followed my father to work, and he completely inverted my notion and understanding of the problem of intolerance. My father’s job involves fighting intolerance. He and his colleagues are trying to develop a method to eliminate intolerance once and for all. Intolerance inflicts serious discomfort and pain in people. Each year, millions of Americans become victims of it. Many even lose their lives because of the horrible consequences of intolerance. In addition to conducting research to find a solution to eliminate intolerance, my father often goes to local high schools and gives lectures to students as a way to raise their awareness. He sometimes even attempts extreme measures, such as using drugs to suppress intolerance from certain groups. Sometimes he is successful, and it makes his efforts worthwhile. But other times the problem persists, and it puts him in despair. My father is a scientific researcher. Intolerance is a condition that occurs after a donated organ is anastomosed to the recipient patient, and it imposes a great obstacle to successful organ transplantation. The recipient’s bodily tissues reject the grafted organ, actively attacking it and eventually leading to its necrosis. The

recipient dies, usually painfully, as a result of the loss of the vital organ. If we could find a way to make the tissues tolerate each other, organ transplantation could become more viable and save millions of lives. People have slowly to realize the fatal consequences of intolerance and have recently formed many orga-

fundamentalists, cultural relativists, and smelly hippies. Apparently, their goal was actually to force their own marginal, deviant ideologies onto others, especially schoolchildren. Their techniques? Calling people names, labeling them as bigots, and harassing them in other ways until they become “tolerant.”

Intolerance is Bad!

nizations to fight intolerance in their communities. My father and his colleagues were thrilled when they heard about the news. With more people involved, they might be able to find a way to finally eliminate intolerance! He immediately got in touch with one of the organizations called “Killers of Intolerant Infidels,” and attended one of their seminars. Unfortunately, he was greatly disappointed. The room was filled with people who have no interest in his research on intolerance. The topic being discussed had nothing to do with medicine, science, or even logic. The members of the group were a pack of racial supremacists, religious

My father attended other similar meetings, and they were almost the exact same as the first one (one of them did not even admit him because apparently he was not of the right race to promote tolerance). Not only do these groups fail to contribute anything to solve the problem of intolerance, but they receive funding from the federal government to promote their supremacist beliefs. My father was furious. He could not understand why a group of ideologues would choose such a misleading name for their cause. Also, he could not believe that the government confused science with supremacist advocacy. With the existence of groups

like “Killers of Intolerant Infidels”, his research receives much less funding because the ideologues take it all and spend it mostly on peyote and hookah pipes. Furthermore, these organizations have caused people to associate the scientists working on organ transplantation with smelly hippies, which has resulted in a drop in public support for such research. While these ideologues propagate their grand quest for cultural tolerance, real people are dying because we cannot prevent physiological intolerance. Our government and countless nonprofits funnel money into marginal causes that only end up bringing together a bunch of aging hippies to smoke hallucinogenic plants and preach the Gospel according to Marley. In the meantime, diseases such as organ failure, cardiac defects, and serious trauma continue to claim the lives of countless people of all races, religions, and ethnicities. But don’t worry—at least recipient patients who succumb to intolerance will know that a politically correct number of doctors failed to prevent their organs from necrotizing.

Tianye Liu is a sophomore in the College of Farts & Sciences. He may be reached at tl387@cornell.edu. Anthony Longo is a sophomore in the College of Farts & Sciences. He may be reached at ajl272@cornell.edu. Inspired by WONDERMARK

The Cornell Review is pleased to present

The Morton-Grigg Tolerant Response Generator For Cornellians, speaking tolerantly is often a game of guess-and-check. If one is worried that he or she may offend his or her fellow person, this utility may be referenced to forge original statements of utmost tolerance.

“Excuse me, fellow

but my

downtrodden working-class oppressed unfortunate hardworking unappreciated misrepresented

moral judgement opinion religion's teaching parent's teaching prior notion personal viewpoint informed knowledge

laborer. homosexual. minority. nature-lover. immigrant. forward-thinker. person of faith.

I don't mean to

contradicts your beliefs. I will reconsider your

alternative non-standard uncommon unaccepted personal open-minded overlooked

offend, prejudice, criticize, discriminate, stereotype, preconceive, be biased, lifestyle. ethnicity. culture. Done! faith. preference. point of view. orientation.

September 22, 2010

Wisemen & Fools The people elected us to end the talk and to act decisively. Chris Christie

Following the light of the sun, we left the Old World. Christopher Columbus

Enthusiasm for a cause sometimes warps judgment. William Howard Taft

to make the other poor bastard die for theirs. George S. Patton

I would say the best moment of all was when I caught a 7.5 pound largemouth bass in my lake. George W. Bush on his best moment in office

No greater injury can be done to any youth than to make him feel that because he belongs to this race or that race he will be advanced in life regardless of his own efforts. Booker T. Washington

If you think this is confrontational, you should really see me when I’m pissed! Chris Christie

"Emergencies" have always been the pretext on which the safeguards of individual liberty have been eroded. Frederich Hayek

We have to pass the bill for you to find out what’s in it. Nancy Pelosi I like America, sometimes. Michael Moore Politics should be the part-time profession of every citizen. Henry Brooks Adams

I introduce to you the next President of the United States, Barack America! Joe Biden

The Republican healthcare plan is simple: get over it or die quickly. Alan Grayson

The Future does not belong to the fainthearted. It belongs to the brave. Ronald Reagan

Castro couldn’t even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union puts the nickel in the toilet. Richard M. Nixon

I’m going to take you out! Carl Paladino

The point of war is not to die for your country but

A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both. Dwight D. Eisenhower Change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change change Barack Obama

To read these articles online, visit The Review's website, cornellreviewonline.com.

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