A veryIMPORTANT DATE

Craig Y Nos Castle was the setting for Adam and Tim’s Mad Hatter’s Tea Party wedding

Images courtesy of Our Beautiful Adventure Photography

Tim and Adam met in Oxford in 2011 at an event organised by their university’s LGBTQ Society. “We shared a love of music, film, and video games, and I immediately thought he was kind, handsome and funny,” says Adam. “We hit it off, and shortly afterwards, Tim asked me out for a coffee.”

Adam popped the question on Christmas Day in 2020. “It was our first Christmas together after almost 10 years of being apart on the big day,” shares Adam. “Christmas is Tim’s favourite holiday, so I gave him the ring as his final present, dropping to one knee as he opened it. The inside of the band was engraved with our initials and, in a nod to our love of video games, I placed it in a box resembling a chest from the Legend of Zelda franchise. It had been an incredibly difficult year for Tim, one that made us keenly aware that tomorrow is not a given. We had been discussing marriage for a while, and it felt like the right time to take this exciting next step.”

Setting The Scene

“Tim is Welsh, and we liked the idea of Wales being the focal point of our celebrations,” explains Adam. “Craig Y Nos Castle is a delightful mix of gothic and whimsical and is situated in the beautiful landscape of the Brecon Beacons. Offering on-site accommodation, stunning views, period décor and a gloriously ornate Opera House, we knew immediately that it was a perfect fit for what we had in mind. The staff were incredible, anticipating everything we needed and providing a strong sense of reassurance on the day.”

The couple chose the Mad Hatter’s Tea Party as the theme for their big day. “We used bunting in the conservatory for our wedding breakfast to amplify the theme,” continues Adam. “Our welcome sign was created from a mirror using white paint, custom stencils, and an easel. The orderof-events was designed to resemble a Wonderland signpost and was made from recycled cardboard.”

Instead of wedding favours, Adam and Tim donated to the charity Mermaids and provided details about the charity on the back of their place cards.

“Our centrepieces were thrifted teapots, filled with flowers, atop a fanned stack of books,” recalls Adam. “We used dried moss and MDF discs for the bases and added teacups, flowers, 3D-printed mushrooms, and pocket watches to the book ‘steps’ for interest. My mother took the lead on our flowers, putting everything together over two days in our base of operations in Blaenavon.

“My sister is a wedding cake designer, but owing to the recent arrival of our second nephew, she was unable to be with us on the day,” adds Adam. “To get around this, she created a stunning, three-tiered showpiece with hand-painted details and a ‘floating’ top hat.”

Craig Y Nos Castle provided the catering for the day. “The wedding breakfast was an afternoon tea, and each guest received a three-tiered cake stand with a delicious assortment of sweet and savoury treats,” says Adam. “The evening buffet was popular and included a good variety of hot food and salad options. Some of our fondest memories of weddings involve freshly made pizza, so we also hired Flour’d Up, a mobile pizzeria, to complement the buffet offering. This proved incredibly popular with our guests and allowed us to accommodate multiple dietary requirements.”

Dressed To Impress

“Being non-binary, I wanted an ensemble blending the masculine, the feminine, and the gender-neutral,” shares Adam. “I was looking for something dramatic, empowering, reconfigurable, and comfortable.

I opted for a white grandad collar shirt, a cobalt blue waistcoat, grey trousers cropped at the ankle, two white overskirts (one structured, one tulle), and a pair of black shoes. The waistcoat and overskirts were designed in collaboration with a dressmaker, while the other pieces were purchased from various retailers. The ability to remove up to three items and still have a complete outfit gave me a lot of scope to ensure I was always comfortable. I ultimately jettisoned the beautiful yet wildly impractical tulle overskirt before the evening function, retaining the shorter, more structured overskirt until the end of the day. Being a milliner, I accessorised with no less than three fascinators (changing after the ceremony and the wedding breakfast), each inspired by a different resident of Wonderland. I completed the look with a buttonhole and a bouquet. Tim wore a cobalt blue suit with a buttonhole in the lapel, a white shirt, a pink tie, and black shoes.”

Adam and Tim asked their wedding party to wear items that made them feel comfortable. “While we did encourage hats/fascinators, we didn’t specify hairstyles, make-up, clothing, or a single, unifying colour,” continues Adam. “For those that wanted a steer, we shared our colour palette for the wedding, but our only requirement was that the outfit made them feel good. The slightly chaotic nature of our theme accommodated this more readily than a traditional concept, but we wanted to give as much control to our loved ones as possible.”

Time To Celebrate

“In line with our theme, we offered a ‘make your own hat’ station, with lots of pre-assembled paper hats and craft supplies for customisation,” explains Adam. “For our younger guests, we offered drawing pads, colouring pens/ pencils, sticker books and bubble wands. We also set up a photo booth using an old digital camera, cardboard accessories, and a Wonderlandinspired backdrop. Our live music was provided by Disco Centric and they performed a slow, soulful rendition of This Will Be (An Everlasting Love) by Natalie Cole for our first dance. They then picked up the pace and invited everyone to join us. The band was incredible and kept the dancefloor filled with two sets of upbeat, familiar songs and a strong stage presence.”

Memorable Moments

The happy couple felt overcome with joy and gratitude. “After the restrictions imposed by the pandemic, it was so special to spend time with the most important people in our lives,” recalls Adam. “The day went according to plan, and Craig Y Nos Castle’s wedding team took care of everything, letting us focus on our guests.

“Our wedding ceremony was particularly special,” adds Adam. “As nonbinary people don’t yet have legal recognition in the UK and all the scripts use gendered language, we decided to have a bare-bones legal ceremony in the registry office about a month before the wedding. While not ideal, it gave us free rein to customise our wedding ceremony down to the last detail and involve our loved ones in leading the celebrations. The wedding ceremony took place in Craig Y Nos Castle’s Opera House. The script was divided into four sections, each led by a different member of our wedding party, spanning an introduction, the history of our relationship, our vows and the exchange of rings, and a celebration of the support of our friends and family. Everyone was given a rose when they entered, and during the ceremony, they all put their roses in a vase, making up a huge bouquet. It symbolised everyone coming together for love. Lots of people commented that this was their favourite part of the day. We think our guests responded to the ceremony’s focus on our relationship, our love, our marriage and our willingness to be honest about what’s important to us. Having the freedom to use a script that could celebrate our marriage, rather than marriage as an institution, was the silver lining of separating the legal ceremony from our wedding day.”

The couple’s friends and family helped make their wedding extra special. “The willingness of our loved ones to take active roles in organising and leading our celebrations was wonderful,” says Adam. “The members of our wedding party, in particular, were so generous with their time, expertise and support in helping us to create something new. The venue’s wedding team were also instrumental to the smooth running of the day, and we are hugely grateful to them.

“As I’m recovering from chronic fatigue syndrome and we were all out of practice at sustained social interaction, we decided to schedule a break between the wedding breakfast and the evening events,” adds Adam. “We were clear with our guests that this was their time to use as they wanted. Some went for a walk around the grounds, others returned to their rooms for a nap, while the remainder took advantage of the quiet to have a proper catch-up with friends and family. This proved to be one of the most popular decisions we made, and several guests commented that waking up from a nap to the sight of freshly made pizza was an experience they’d like to repeat.”

ADAM AND TIM’S CONTACTS

Venue and catering, Craig Y Nos Castle, www.craigynoscastleweddings.com | Photographer, Our Beautiful Adventure Photography, www.ourbeautifuladventure.co.uk | Outfits and alterations, Andrea Kerry - Textile Artist, www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100057176511293 Fascinators, Áccent Millinery, www.accent-millinery.co.uk | Cake showpiece, Wild Thistle Cake Design, www.wildthistlecakedesign.com | Pizza, Flour’d Up, www.flourdup.com | Flowers, Triangle Nursery, www.trianglenursery.co.uk | Stationery design, AccentArtistry, www.redbubble.com/people/accentartistry/shop | Place card calligraphy, Mary Challenger, mary@artflow.plus.com | Place cards printing, printed.com, www.printed.com | Order of service printing, DigitalPrinting.co.uk, www.digitalprinting.co.uk | Dried flower confetti, Little Added Touches, www.littleaddedtouches.com | Entertainment, Disco Centric, www.discocentric.co.uk

**LAST MINUTE WEDDING DATES AVAILABLE UP TO APRIL 2024** www.craigynoscastleweddings.com