FROM MISS TO MRS

County Wedding Magazines’ senior editor Melissa Barker shares her wedding planning journey

It’s finally here, my last bride’s diary entry before I become a married woman! When we first got engaged nearly 18 months ago, the wedding seemed so far away that it almost didn’t feel real, and yet here we are about to walk down the aisle. The last few weeks of planning have been a bit manic with all of our suppliers getting in touch asking for lastminute details, and although it can feel a little overwhelming, it’s also really exciting! This issue is all about my dress alterations, hair and make-up trial and keeping positive as the big day approaches...

FITS LIKE A GLOVE

I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t incredibly nervous for my first dress fitting. I purchased my gown over a year ago, and I’ve gone through phases during that time where I’ve loved it and also doubted it. It was a size too big when I bought it, so looking back at the pictures it was hard to imagine what it would look like fitting properly. I think my main worry was ‘what if it doesn’t look like I imagined or even worse, what if the seamstress makes it too small or too short!?’ As someone who likes to micromanage everything, this situation was certainly out of my comfort zone.

I took two of my bridesmaids with me for my first appointment for moral support, and the seamstress, Danielle, was wonderful. She made us feel really at ease and like nothing was too much trouble. She knew right away how to alter my dress and was able to do it within a quick timeframe. I left the appointment feeling much calmer but also a little apprehensive about how the dress would eventually turn out.

Fast forward a month, it was time for my second fitting and for the bridesmaids’ dresses to be altered. After a morning of panicking and worrying, I can’t put into words how relieved I felt when I tried on my dress and it fit like a glove. It still needed a few tweaks here and there, but overall I felt much happier as I was no longer drowning in a sea of fabric and worrying that my boobs might fall out at a moment’s notice! Danielle was also very reassuring to the bridesmaids who were worried about parts of their dresses and, within a week, we had all three back looking perfect.

Having had several meltdowns over this, my advice to any nearlyweds-to-be is to try not to panic and trust your suppliers. As long as they have good reviews and are confident in their capabilities, then leave it to them – they’re the experts after all! FACING FACTS

As someone who has only worn make-up once for prom night many years ago, I was unsure of what I wanted when it came to my bridal make-up. Make-up is not my forte and, much to my friends’ amusement, I can’t tell you the difference between highlighter, foundation and concealer – and that’s just for starters!

For this reason, I chose a hair stylist and make-up artist with great reviews, who are familiar with my venue and whole-heartedly put my trust in them.

During my trial, she sat me down and asked what I wanted, and I was honest and said ‘no idea’. She laughed and reassured me that I’m not the only woman in the world who doesn’t wear make-up (even though it feels like it sometimes). She went for a very natural look and talked me through the process. Even though my make-up looked great and was very subtle, it was still a shock to see myself with it on. It took me the whole day to get used to it, but I was really pleased with the result, and felt like a princess.

When it comes to hair (you’ll be pleased to hear I’m not as clueless), I had a rough idea of what style I wanted but was torn between a half up and half down look or an up do. My hair stylist was wonderful! She created both looks for me, took loads of pictures and made sure I was happy with both styles. After a lot of deliberation I’ve decided on an up do, as my dress has dramatic front and back detailing that I didn’t want anything to detract from. I left my hair and make-up in place, like they suggested, for the whole day and it still looked wonderful by 11pm.

I was really pleased with the whole experience and being dressed up made me feel so excited to finally marry my best friend.

Thank you all for sticking with me throughout my wedding journey. I hope you enjoy planning your own day and everything turns out perfectly!

Hindsight is a marvellous thing

Melissa’s hubby-to-be opens a window into the wedding planning journey from the groom’s perspective

Hello readers, as I’m sure you’re all well aware, my beautiful Melissa has been detailing our journey from our couch-based lockdown proposal to the wedding altar, and what a journey it has been! Thankfully Melissa is the most organised person on the planet, so my involvement in this process has been minimal at best, however that being said, I’ve picked up one or two things along the way that Melissa has generously given me this space to share...

GUEST LIST

Being the social beast I am, I found putting together a finalised wedding guest list quite difficult. Much to Melissa’s dismay I wanted to invite everyone I’d ever met and their postman. However, (thankfully) the capacity of our venue and overall budget (I don’t think I appreciated how expensive day guests are) put the brakes on my invite rampage and forced me to reign in my expectations somewhat. I found that I felt quite guilty about not inviting everyone I’ve ever spoken to, but you definitely do need to draw the line somewhere. My advice to anyone planning a wedding is don’t lose any sleep over not inviting someone, chances are they probably weren’t going to invite you to their wedding anyway!

CHOOSING YOUR GROOMSMEN

Thankfully this was quite an easy one for me. My best man has been my closest ally and confident for 15 years now, so there was no hesitation in my mind when asking him. My biggest concern was that having four groomsmen might be too many, but I couldn’t imagine any of them not being next to me for support, so the thought of losing one of them from the party would have been like removing oxygen. Another thing I’m grateful for is that they all get along brilliantly. I’ve heard some real horror stories about infighting between people’s bridesmaids and groomsmen, so this is definitely something to consider when selecting your party. You might love them all, but do they like each other? You’d think that people would pull together for their friend’s biggest day, but you never know.

PLANNING YOUR STAG DO

I’ll be honest, I never really saw the purpose of a stag do. Admittedly in my mind, I had this warped perception of the event being a trip to a dubious location to take part in nefarious activities. I’m not a particularly good drinker, and as I creep onto the darker side of my 30s, I’m even worse at handling a hangover, so the prospect of this seemed less than appealing. Sitting down to discuss with my (similarly worldweary) best man, we came to the reassuring realisation that a stag do can be whatever you want it to be. In my instance, I like Centre Parcs, and the thought of a trip there (and many, many barbecues) seemed like a slice of heaven, so this was a bit of a no-brainer. Ultimately my advice to any groom-to-be is don’t be afraid to book something that will make you happy. If your groomsmen deserve their place in your party, they won’t challenge your choices.

THE SPEECH

This is a big one, probably the biggest responsibility of the groom. The wedding day is such a big event in a person’s life, and the speeches really stick with attendees – good or bad! My first piece of advice would be not to leave it to the last minute. It’s certainly one of those things that can be put off, but I promise it won’t be worth the anxiety! There are thousands of great speech templates online that you can use as a starting point. Once I got started, I found writing about my loved ones and the significance of the day was easy, as it’s your opportunity to be honest, and just gush about everything. You proposed for a reason and this is your chance to share it with everyone, including your bride. Write from your heart, speak from the bottom of your lungs and try not to stare at your feet the whole time! Oh, and practicing the speech once or twice before the big day probably isn’t a bad idea!