DRAMA FREE COMMUNICATION
FIGHT FLIGHT FREEZE OR FLOW
•your name • position • goal [I would like to learn]
Introductions
SINK OR SWIM? WE WANT YOU TO
FLOW
…
So, Something Really Interesting Happens…
“PEOPLE WILL CONTINUE TO BE WHO THEY ARE, DESPITE
YOUR OPINION OF THEM”
GOT CONFLICT? Toucan Play at that Game
Sometimes Dealing with Difficult Interactions Can Be Toucan Fusing
I CAN NOT TEACH YOU ANYTHING;
BUT, I CAN MAKE YOU THINK!
WHAT CAN WE LEARN FROM THE TOUCAN?
•Great Communication
How can my voice add value at work?
•Personality: Flair/Full of Color
You will be noticed by others at work. What do I add to the environment?
•Positive Energy
Who am I? What vibe will I offer; am I fun, helpful, engaging, kind, passionate, joyful, etc?
Cliche Fact Opinion Emotion
CRISIS
DANGER OPPORTUNITY
“COUNTING FOR DUMMIES”
Toucan’tDoThis!
“RUDENESS IS THE WEAK MAN’S IMITATION OF STRENGTH”
TOUCAN’T BE SUCCESSFUL
DURING DRAMA WHEN THERE IS: PUSHING BACK ARGUING
DENYING
DEFENDING
CRYING COUNTER ATTACKING
EXPLAINING
ARGUMENTS DIE WITH NEGLECT!
REACTIVE & CREATIVE
CONSIST OF THE SAME LETTERS
WILL YOU REACT [CAUSE & EFFECT] OR…
CREATE
[CAUSE THE EFFECT]
QUESTION:
“WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR MY ATTITUDE?”
LOOK IN THE MIRROR!
TOUCAN
“BIRDS OF A FEATHER…”
“There is More Strength in Your Vulnerability Than There Will Ever Be in Your Aggression”
DON’T GIVE YOUR POWER AWAY! WHAT DOES THIS MEAN?
MAKE THE… L.OVE E.NERGY A.TTENTION P.OWER
LISTEN SILENT
SO JUST WAIT…
W - Why W - What
A - Am A - Am
I - I I - I
T - Talking T - Thinking
GOT STRESS? GOAL: TO REDUCE RESISTANCE
Don’t SHOULD on People!
Eliminate These Words to Find Your “Conversation Peace”
SHOULD SHOULDN’T NEED TO DON’T NOT OUGHT TO HAVE TO STOP
Your Goal: To Focus on being a Toucan, Rather than a Toucan’t…
ISLAND FLOW
[1] GREET THEM AND PERSONALIZE THE MESSAGE
[2] TELL THEM WHAT THEY DID [VERBAL REPLAY]
[3] TELL THEM HOW IT MADE YOU FEEL -or-
TELL THEM WHAT HAPPENED WHEN THEY DID THAT
[4] USE AN AWARENESS STATEMENT
[TELL THEM YOU JUST THOUGHT THEY SHOULD KNOW TELL YOU, PUT IT ON YOUR RADAR, LAY IT ON THE TABLE, MAKE YOU AWARE OF IT, TALK ABOUT IT, BRING IT UP OR OUT IN THE OPEN]
“Breathe…robotic, neutral, positive… go…”
LET’S FOCUS ON WORDS THAT WORK
`
• MAY • PREFER • I NOTICED • FEELING/NEED
CONFUSE THEM! DON’T DEFUSE THEM!
SUMMARY
~PEOPLE WILL BEHAVE POORLY WHEN TRIGGERED; THAT’S HUMAN NATURE
~YOU CAN ONLY CONTROL YOUR CONTROLABLES & THE GOOD NEWS IS THAT YOU HAVE CHOICES
~CHOOSE WISELY!
ANY QUESTIONS?
