Seven Wonders Street

By Iris Hehir & Fox Meyer

While the population of G. selwynidae remains protected today, the patriarch of the colony is remembered as one of the Seven Wonders. This individual, known as Verne the Gnome, was a legendary figure in Selwyn College. He was killed in an attempted kidnapping, when lasso-wielding D. knoxidae brought him to the ground. He died on impact.

The ongoing sporting and cultural competitions between the two colleges are when the gnomes are most at risk. Conservationists are advised to lock their dorms, carry Dove soap, and ward off roving groups of D. knoxidae when they are in heat or on the prowl. Hopefully in the future we can see a thriving wild population of Selwyn Gnomes once again. For now, they remain largely in the care of zoologists and their hosts, D. selwynidae