15 march 2017

15 March 2017

Published every Wednesday by CXpress 2006 (Pty) Ltd - PO Box 1449, Plettenberg Bay 6600 - 6 Park Lane, Plettenberg Bay - Tel: 044 533 1004 - Fax: 044 533 0852 Email: editor@cxpress.co.za / advertising@cxpress.co.za Web page: www.cxpress.co.za Printed by Group Editors

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Photo: Chumisa Kalawe

30 Days of water left This image shows the state of Knysna’s Akkerkloof Dam at its March 13 level of 43%, which translates into 30 days of water for the use of Greater Knysna consumers. The latest figures of actual rainfall compared to water usage render the picture even bleaker: with 8.4mm of rainfall over the past week and a target usage of 8-Megalitres per day, actual consumption was still sitting at 12.2-Megalitres daily by going to press. With regard to Bitou, reliable sources advised that water restrictions are on the cards in the immediate future. Both municipalities extended an urgent plea for residents and visitors to take the situation seriously and do everything in their power to use water sparingly.

All Blacks in Plett?

A dire week on local crime scene

Keep your head down...

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CXPRESS

NEWS & VIEWS

15 March 2017

OBITUARY

From surfing to golf, books to bowls, fishing to friendships, ‘Aunty’ Beryl had it waxed B ORN in Bulawayo in then Rhodesia, Beryl Philips started boarding school at a young age in Rhodesia, as her father was then mayor of Bulawayo and her parents spent a lot of time working for the government.

Beryl loved her sport and excelled in hockey, swimming, and tennis. After finishing her school career she moved to Cape Town to study, and this is where she met her late husband, Cubby Carter Johnson.

Beryl and Cubby started the family business Johnson Sportswear and their factory in Woodstock supplied a great many soccer teams with tracksuits and sportswear.

Beryl became a keen surfer when the couple moved to Llandudno and to Cubby’s great irritation, she was all round regarded as a better surfer than he was!

When she took up golf at a later stage, she quickly moved up the ranks to become a six-

FRIEND FOR LIFE TO MANY: Beryl Philips / Carter Johnson / Heath (19 November 1931 - 27 February 2017) leaves a crowd of loved ones behind

handicap contender.

Beryl eventually moved to Plettenberg Bay with her new husband, Colin Heath, where she joined the bowling club.

She served as the Club’s lady president in 1993 and 1994.

Beryl had many friends, young and old, and loved spending her weekends on the river bank, fishing.

When Colin died, Beryl decided she needed something to keep her busy and so started doing the books for various businesses in Plett. Eventually, after much persuasion, Beryl bought herself a computer and, at 65, she became computer literate.

Beryl will be sorely missed by her family: children Charlie, Ricky, Mark, and Janet; son in law Rob and daughter in law Jacqui; Christine and Alison; and grandchildren Roscoe, Micaela, Tara, Abigail, Ryan, Alex, and Stella.

• Well-loved Plett local Mark ‘CJ’ Carter Johnson did much to soften the blow of his mom’s

Jogging Down Memory Lane

sudden departure when sharing the sad news with her friends at CXPRESS, explaining how perfectly Beryl’s last day had panned out.

“Mom took Holy Communion at her church that morning and then went to sit on the BI rocks, checking out the Nippers Club Champs action where [her granddaughter] Stella featured, from a comfortable distance on that beautiful sunny day.”

CJ said she was pleasantly surprised by the arrival in town later that day of long-time friends from the Cape, and sharing jokes over a drink with them at Piesang Valley Lodge when her final hour arrived.

Beryl’s jolly presence has been felt in get-togethers at the houses of her children, when bumping into her at the gym or elsewhere in the great Plett outdoors for as long as CXPRESS has been around. Our town is a lot poorer for her departure. Rest in peace, ‘Aunty’ Beryl. - Eds. Derek Frielinghaus

The mighty All Blacks and familiar faces of Plett revisited about his whereabouts, please be in touch!

Email your reminiscences to haus@mweb.co.za (with or without your name), or drop it off in hard copy at the CXPRESS office at 6 Park Lane in Plett CBD.

PRE-WORLD CUP TRAINING: The All Blacks team trained preceding THAT 1995 World Cup final, and these pics were taken at Plett’s rugby fields - do you recognise the Kiwis pictured here?

RAWLING through some photos from two-odd decades ago, I was reminded of the great excitement in Plettenberg Bay when the mighty All Blacks descended on the town for their training camp leading up to the 1995

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Rugby World Cup. The team mostly ran from the Beacon Isle Hotel, where they were staying throughout their sojourn here, to the rugby field down Gris Nez that today houses Bitou Rugby Club, as well as being a preferred venue

for municipal shindigs.

Perhaps less glorious are the other faces pictured here - men who were very much part of the furniture in Plett during the 90s. If you spot a family member or acquaintance on this page and could tell us more

WAAR IS JULLE NOU, OOMPIES? Pictured here are locals who were familiar faces in Plettenberg Bay’s Main Street and surrounds in the 90s, but where are they now? If you know... please be in touch.

NEWS & VIEWS

15 March 2017

CXPRESS

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Questions and heartbreak after crime-heavy days rock Plettenberg Bay The tragic passing of a 21-year-old man, stabbed to death in KwaNokuthula last week, turned out to be a forerunner to a grim weekend in Bitou; two further murders in Kranshoek and Wittedrift, also knife attacks, have overshadowed the violent mugging of two holidaymakers at The Wedge, and the stabbing of an SAPS K9 unit police dog - NIKKI RIDLEY reports ESCRIBED by his employer as a “fantastic young guy”, Plett Security employee Unathi Ndamasi, 21, was off duty and on his way home on the night of March 6 when he was attacked and stabbed three times in the back, dying from a blow that punctured his lung, according to autopsy reports.

His body was discovered at 10pm that night in Ekumleni Street, KwaNokuthula.

Otto Olivier said that Ndamasi had worked for Plett Security for almost three years and had also been involved in crime prevention operations in Plett.

He was employed as a security guard at the KwaNokuthula Supermarket at the time of his death.

Olivier added that while initially they didn’t know whether or not the attack might be related to his work as a security guard or his participation in community crime prevention efforts, information had since come to light indicating that the attack was of a “personal nature”.

This came after reports of a man seen arguing loudly with Ndamasi at his home earlier last week.

A suspect has been arrested. Ndamasi’s parents have both passed away, and he had no other direct family in Plett. Plett Security held a ceremony for him at his home, and his body will be sent back to relatives in the Eastern Cape for burial.

In a statement released on March 7, Olivier wrote: “Unathi will be sorely missed by everyone at Plett Security. His enthusiasm and kindness will live on in the hearts of his brothers in crime prevention.”

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January murder victim’s

partner found dead in Wittedrift home An as yet officially unnamed man was found murdered in his Wittedrift home on Sunday morning March 12. Police made the grisly discovery of the body after tracing a suspected stolen BMW, abandoned in Bossiesgif after a police chase, to the address.

In a bizarre twist, the victim is believed to have been the life partner of a man stabbed to death in Green Valley in January this year - allegedly during a “drug deal gone wrong”.

Police were alerted to the “suspicious” presence of the black BMW in the Qolweni/Bossiesgif area on Sunday morning.

As per a statement by Plett SAPS, officers arrived to find four occupants in the process of attempting to change a number plate.

The four jumped out and fled from the police in different directions, escaping between the houses.

Police then traced the car back to a house in Heuwel Street, Wittedrift. When getting no response from anyone in the house, they forced entry and discovered the victim seemingly having succumbed to knife wounds - details of which are currently being withheld.

Three suspects aged 21-29 have been arrested. They will appear in the Plett Magistrate court on March 15 on charges of murder.

No official statement is available as to a connection between the murders.

According to Plett Animal Welfare Services (PAWS) board member Jill Mouat, a number of apparently highly traumatised and antagonistic dogs found on the property had been expertly calmed and

captured by PAWS Inspector Robert Ruiters.

Anyone with information pertaining to the murder, or the suspects who fled the BMW (Reg. CEY 2197) in Bossiesgif, is asked to contact Detective Sergeant Bulawa of the Plett SAPS on 083 284 9359.

Kranshoek man stabbed after ‘clipping’ pedestrian In a second incident on the weekend, a man was stabbed to death in Kranshoek on the evening of Sunday March 12 - allegedly as he was riding his scooter back from an evening trip to a local Spaza shop.

Olivier said the man was riding down a badly-lit road when he hit someone who walked into the path of the scooter.

According to what Olivier described as “rumours” from members of the community who may not necessarily have witnessed the ensuing events, the impact was not severe, the deceased only “clipping” the man.

However, the deceased stopped and got off the bike to ask the man if he was okay, at which point the suspect stabbed him once in the chest, killing him.

According to Olivier, the assailant was out on parole, but he was not able to give any details regarding his identity, prior convictions, or parole conditions.

It is also not known yet if the “interception” of the bike and ensuing attack was premeditated, or a horrific over-reaction to an accident.

The Plett SAPS have not supplied any information at the time of going to press, and no further details are available other than that the victim, whose name has not yet been released, has left behind a shocked and shat-

tered wife and family - the event too recent and the pain too raw for them to be approached at this time.

Beach mugging and plea for prevention Two foreign holidaymakers were mugged at The Wedge at around 4pm on Sunday March 12 near the walkway over the rocks to Lookout Beach. The couple were allegedly waylaid by two attackers and the man was assaulted.

The attackers took cash and cellphones before dis-

appearing into the bushes between Main and Lookout beaches. The couple then ran to a nearby restaurant and alerted the police.

No further information regarding the victims or suspects is available at this time, but Olivier made a point of saying that these kinds of incidents happen on a weekly basis in the area between Lookout Deck restaurant and The Wedge.

He urges great caution from anyone wishing to take a stroll there, and is appealing to authorities to

create a security presence to stop this trend.

“There aren’t even any signs there warning people of the potential danger, but it happens every single week, and it’s escalating.

We as a community need to start addressing that.”

He added that it is extremely difficult to find suspects in the area. “There are a lot of footpaths criss-crossing everywhere through the thick bushes. It’s not easy... we need security personnel in place here.”

To page 4

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CXPRESS

NEWS & VIEWS

15 March 2017

Questions and heartbreak after crime-heavy days rock Plettenberg Bay From page 3 K9 SAPS dog survives stabbing On a far happier note, local K9 unit dog Caesar, who is partnered with SAPS officer Waldo Gerber is recovering well after being stabbed in the process of apprehending a robbery suspect near Dassen Island on March 11. Olivier gave an account of the events.

“Waldo and Caesar were busy patrolling on Saturday morning when Waldo saw two suspects jump over a fence carrying what appeared to be stolen property.

They apprehended the suspects and while Waldo was busy arresting one and the dog arresting the other, Caesar was stabbed in

the neck.

“Waldo had to let his suspect go in order to assist his partner, and both suspects ran away.”

Olivier explained how swift response from SAPS and PBCPA members led to the quick arrest of both men, who were taken into custody. Caesar was rushed to Marine Way Animal Hospital and is set to make a full recovery.

According to an SAPS statement, the two men have been charged with possession of stolen goods, possession of a dangerous weapon, and assault.

Another Lookout mugging Two more tourists were robbed

at the walkway near The Wedge in the late afternoon of Monday March 13. Two suspects were apprehended less than a half hour of the call going out - caught and held at The Market Square after a coordinated response effort between members of Plett Security, Smhart Alarms, ADT, Plett Watch, and Plett SAPS and not least the alert attention of Sportscentre/Plett Sports employee Chad Mansfield, who spotted the suspects as they were boarding a taxi.

The two elderly victims were reported to have been enjoying their last day of holidays in Plett when they were accosted.

ET TU, BRUTE? The beautiful white Alsatian K9 soldier Caesar - with his partner of the past six years, SAPS officer Waldo Gerber - was stabbed in the line of duty, see inset, last Saturday, but is on the mend after being stitched up by the able crew at Marine Way Animal Hospital

March 15 is D-Day for Angie’s G-Spot

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F an eleventh hour lifeline is not tossed their way, Angie and Harold Beaumont of the iconic Garden Route stop-over Angie’s G-Spot will have to tear down not only their business but also their own home.

“We don’t know what we are going to do if it comes to that point. Our income will be gone in an instant and so will the roof over our heads,” a devastated Angie said just hours before the demolition date.

George Municipality recently obtained a court order for the demolition of the quaint watering hole, restaurant and casual accommodation establishment off the Prince Alfred Pass between Plett and Uniondale.

The demolition date was set for today, Wednesday March 15.

Since the order was issued, several groups of supporters have started campaigns to stop the demolition, including attempts to raise funds to appeal the court decision.

Municipal spokesman Chantal Edwards-Klose said the primary reasons for the order were that Angie’s was constructed without municipal approval; the buildings had been erected over property boundaries and had been built below the flood line of a river without the environmental approval in terms of NEMA. “These structures are located in the flood line of a river, and the location posed a potential danger to the owners and visitors. The municipality must act in the best interests of, and safeguard the public from potential dangers, and for these reasons obtained a court order for the demolition of the structures,” Edwards-Klose said.

She added that had the municipality not taken action, it

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could have been held liable for loss of property and lives in the event of a flood.

The Beaumonts however argued that when they bought the property in 2008, most of the structures had already been on the land, including the 1952 bus they are living in. After some renovations, they decided to add a workshop and “wood bedrooms on stilts”.

Angie said that a building inspector from Uniondale Municipality visited the property.

“He said we did not need plans but needed to hand in sketches to the municipality. I had plans done and handed them in to Eden District Municipality.”

Angie said the workshop and bedrooms, which were verbally approved by the Uniondale building inspector, were then built. The municipality then approved a licence enabling them to serve food and their liquor licence was also approved later.

Angie believes their troubles started after complaints from neighbours. “We have used different lawyers to fight the case and have even sold our car and goods to pay for the costs. We were eventually served a summons by the municipality, which we had to defend.”

She added that they could not defend the matter as they could not afford the legal fees.

Angie said they were hoping for a miracle to happen today.

“Maybe a message from the mayor’s office saying that we had more time… I just cannot imagine the anguish we will endure when we have to tear down what we have worked so hard to build up over the years.”

She said if that had to happen, they would have nowhere to live and no income.

Garden Route Media NO JOKE: The sign board at the stop-over reads, inter alia, ‘Hot beer, lousy food, bad service…

Welcome to Angie’s G-Spot’ - but now its hosts’ particular sense of humour and hospitality may be lost to visitors for good

NEWS & VIEWS

15 March 2017

Pagan roots sprout in the wilderness Words & photos: Bob Hopkin

ARLIER this month a group of charmingly eccentric dancers and musicians, the Jubilee Morris Men, celebrated their 40th anniversary with a stay in Wilderness and a number of performances, to the delight of local residents.

Formed in 1977 to celebrate Queen Elizabeth’s

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silver jubilee, the group of ex patriot British residents of South Africa has had some 80 members over the years with 10 to 12 active at any one time until they disbanded in 2007.

Prompted by members in Wilderness and Sedgefield, the remainders of the group, now scattered all over the world, decided to gravitate back to South Africa and hold

their 40th anniversary on the Garden Route.

Spokesperson and ‘foreman’ of the dancers Dave Mourant said that Morris dancing had its roots in the pagan festivals of the winter solstice and the fertility rites of the spring equinox.

“Written references to this type of dancing date back to the 1300s but the origins go back much earlier than that.

The dances can be quite strenuous and require regular practice as the moves are complex and, as we use sticks in the rhythm, making a wrong move can hurt!” he said.

Morris dancing is still popular in the UK, especially in the south western counties, and is usually performed at country fairs, particularly in the picturesque hilly area of the Cotswolds.

ALL THE RIGHT MOVES: Ex-pat Brits show off their ancient Morris dancing skills in the coven of Wilderness

Find out more about optic fibre in George today HE local branch of the SA Institute of Electrical Engineers hosts a lecture today (March 15) entitled Optic Fibre and Next Generation Networks in the Southern Cape, presented by Lance van Staden at Wilderness

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Hotel (4:15 for 4:30pm).

Next Generation Networks (NGN) serves an ever-increasing demand for data bandwidth by businesses, as well as for the facilitation of personal and social activities.

This presentation will

explain the role of optical fibre in NGN, which includes Ethernet, LTE, VDSL and Passive Optical Networks, and its part in Openserve’s open access network roll-out in the Southern Cape.

Van Staden graduated

with a BSc Electrical Engineering from UCT and has diplomas in Project Management and Senior Management as well as a Higher Diploma in Management Practice.

Email saiee.southern. cape@gmail.com for info.

CXPRESS

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CXPRESS

NEWS & VIEWS

15 March 2017

Matrics 2017: play the long game to ace your finals RADE 12s who are serious about giving their final exams the best shot this year have the most valuable weapon in their arsenal - time - and should use it to their advantage, according to a leading education expert.

“Later in the year, Matrics will get plenty of advice about how to best prepare for their exams, but for the most part this advice will focus on last-minute measures,” says Dale Taylor of The Independent Institute of Education.

“The best way to walk confidently into the exam room, however, is to make sure that you don’t just study over the next few months, but that you actually use the time to prepare.” Taylor says although there is a gigantic difference between studying, which mostly consists of cramming facts into one’s head, and properly preparing, which takes time and strategy, many people are not aware of the distinction between the two.

“True preparation for an examination requires you to understand concepts in such a way that you are able to engage with them at higher levels. You should be able to apply them, analyse them, evaluate them, and create by using them.

“The bottom line is: you need to practise, and this often means putting pen to paper, which allows you to reflect on your knowledge and

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engrain your learning into your long-term memory.

“When studying, make sure that you have not just committed the ideas and facts to memory, but that you understand how they are linked to other concepts and ideas. Parrot-fashion memorising of lists is not going to cut it when studying for your finals,” explains Taylor.

She says there are two very effective ways of creating “networks of meaning” when studying: Create power point presentations of the work Note down the key words associated with the idea.

After reading through and summarising the content, go through the presentation and talk yourself through it, using the key words as impetus for your talk.

If you are working in a study group, a variation on this could be for one person to ‘teach’ the others using this presentation of key words. For example, key words about photosynthesis at a Matric level could be: • Chlorophyll • Stroma • 6CO2 + 6H2O -> C6H12O6 + 6O2 • Light reactions • Dark reactions.

True learning takes place not only at the stage of summarising the information, but also when delivering the presentation.

Make visual maps Visual maps allow you to record the structure of the knowledge, whether it is in a cycle, flow chart, hierarchi-

cal tree diagram, or Venn diagram. The choice of visual map is determined by the nature of the content.

By mapping the knowledge visually, you create ‘cues’ of keywords (which are much easier to recall than long, complex facts), as well as networks of meaning (what connects with what?), enabling you to engage more meaningfully with the higher order questions in the exam.

“Taking the time to develop your learning over several months in this manner will allow you to master your work to a degree which will be virtually impossible to replicate if your usual approach is to study only in the weeks leading up to the exam,” says Taylor.

“In addition, taking the long game approach will be significantly more rewarding, as well as take an immense amount of stress off your shoulders which will leave you more relaxed and able to deal with all the other pressures you will face this year, not to mention the pressure of walking into an intimidating exam room.”

Taylor concludes that being able to understand conceptually is what sets distinctive students apart from the average rest.

“By endeavouring to understand conceptually instead of like a parrot, you will stand a much better chance when it comes to those tougher questions on the examination paper.”

Knysna traffic and law enforcers revisit tools will equip them to resterling service basics claim the streets of Greater NYSNA Municipality held a strategic and training workshop with its traffic and law enforcement officers recently. Traffic Superintendent Nathan Arendse was the coordinating facilitator of a particularly uplifting session, during which ways of improving the conduct and service delivery of these officials were addressed.

The focus was on a ‘back to basics’ approach for traffic and law enforcement officials to provide an effective and efficient service that is community oriented and rendered by professional, accountable and highly motivated staff. Another point of discussion was the health and general well-being of these officers.

Knysna mayor Eleanore Bouw-Spies said she was delighted about the session’s outcome, and that staff members were being equipped with vital skills.

“The Traffic and Law Enforcement Departments play a vital role in our town as they deal directly with

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the public. Not only will this back to basics approach enhance their service to our residents, but it is also important for personal development as the skills acquired here will be useful outside the work place.”

Arendse elaborated on changes in the pipeline for his department’s personnel.

“A paradigm shift needs to take place in order for them to do their jobs to the best of their ability.

“New habits will be introduced, using the familiar structure of the representation and meaning behind the star they wear: Pride, Integrity, Honesty, Respect and Dignity. These five

Knysna,” said Arendse.

“Our community is entitled to expect a traffic and law enforcement service that is beyond reproach in matters of integrity and honesty, with an impartial and courteous traffic policing service that is responsive to its needs,” Bouw-Spies added.

“Open and honest communication encourages trust, while responsible and accountable management and involvement in the planning of law enforcement improvement strategies directly affect our community. If this vision is shared by residents and the department, our back to basics goal is sure to be achieved.”

READY TO LEARN: Knysna Traffic officials in good spirits before the recent Back to Basics workshop

BUSINESS

15 March 2017

Finance fundi signs up for service in Knysna NYSNA Municipality this month announced that Mbulelo Memani had been welcomed into the fold as new Chief Financial Officer (CFO).

Memani, whose contract started on March 1, is well qualified to head the Finance Department as director, bringing with him a wealth of financial management qualifications and experience.

His impressive academic qualifications include a postgraduate diploma in Internal Audit, a BCom degree in Municipal Accounting, a certificate from Wits Business School in Municipal Development Finance, certificates from the Researchbased Institution affiliated to the University of Cape Town in Municipal Budgeting and Reporting Cycle, and Principles of Budgeting within a Municipality.

Memani’s work experience ranges from working as Witzenberg Municipality’s Supply Chain manager to dealing with Account

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Projects and Costing in the Finance Department of Breede Valley Municipality.

He proceeded to serve as Expenditure Manager and Head of Department: Budgeting and Costing in the Financial Planning Department, and was then appointed Acting Senior Manager: Financial Planning/Budget and Treasury.

Most recently, Memani held the post of Senior Manager: Budget and Treasury at Bitou Municipality.

“I am looking forward to utilising the relevant theoretical and practical knowledge I have accumulated to best benefit Knysna Municipality. In my career to date, I have been entrusted with various challenging tasks aimed at specific objectives,” said Memani.

“I am proud to say that I have achieved all objectives tasked with, including development of the Supply Chain Units at Breede Valley and Witzenberg, and that a clean audit was achieved during my time as

Acting Financial Planning manager at Breede Valley.

“Finally, I enjoyed serving as Acting CFO for Bitou since February 2016, when my predecessor was seconded to assist at Oudtshoorn Municipality.”

Acting municipal manager Johnny Douglas welcomed his new colleague. “Taking into account his qualifications, work experience and achievements within local municipalities, I look forward to Mr Memani taking over the reins of our Financial Department.”

Knysna mayor Eleanore Bouw-Spies added: “He proved himself as a very competent candidate during the rigorous interview process, leaving us with no doubt as to his suitability as our Finance director.

On behalf of council, I welcome him to the municipality and wish him well.

“I foresee working closely with Mr Memani and am confident that he’ll play a vital role in providing the best for Greater Knysna.”

MEET MR ‘ME-MONEY’: Mbulelo Memani took up the post of financial chief at Knysna Municipality on March 1 after his recent service to Bitou

CXPRESS

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Smith now partner in longstanding Plettenberg Bay law firm

Paul Jordaan, at right, has been practising as an attorney in Plettenberg Bay for over 30 years.

Willie Smith, left, has been with the firm for 11 years and has now joined as partner, resulting in the fact that the firm will henceforth be known as Jordaan & Smith Attorneys. Smith finds himself more often than not in the litigation stand, whereas Jordaan does mostly conveyancing. “But,” says the junior partner of this legal-eagle duo, “I wouldn’t call it specialising as such - more the main focus of each of us respectively.” Visit the team at Jordaan & Smith in their High Street offices, below, and see the advert on page 2 for contact information.

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CXPRESS

INTERVAL

15 March 2017

Black and white and red was visiting my youngest daughter last night when I asked if I could borrow a newspaper.

“This is the 21st Century,”

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she said. “We don’t waste money on newspapers. Here, use my iPad.” I can tell you this... that fly never knew what hit him!

Look at the big brains on these Britains...

• Beg, Borrow or Steal (BBC2) Presenter Jamie Theakston: “Where do you think Cambridge University is?”

Contestant: “Geography isn’t my strong point.”

Theakston: “There is a clue in the title.”

Contestant: “Leicester.”

• BBC Norfolk Stewart White: “Who had a worldwide hit with the song What a Wonderful World?”

Contestant: “Sorry, I don’t know.”

White: “I’ll give you some clues: what do you call the part between your hand and your elbow?”

Contestant: “Arm.” White: “Correct. And if you’re not weak, you’re...?”

Contestant: “Strong.”

White: “Correct - and what was Lord Mountbatten’s first name?”

Contestant: “Louis.”

White: “Well, there we are then. So who had a worldwide hit with What a Wonderful World?”

Contestant: “Was it Frank Sinatra?”

• The Late Show (BBC Midlands) Alex Trelinski: “What is the capital of Italy?”

Contestant: “France.”

Trelinski: “France is another country. Try again.”

Contestant: “Oh, um, Benidorm.”

Trelinski: “Wrong, sorry, let’s try another question. In which country is the Parthenon?”

Contestant: “Sorry, I don’t know.”

Trelinski: “Just guess a country then.”

Contestant: “Paris.”

• The Weakest Link (BBC2) Anne Robinson: “Oscar Wilde, Adolf Hitler, and Jeffrey Archer have all written books about their experiences in what: Prison, or the Conservative Party?”

Contestant: “The Conservative Party.”

• Beacon Radio (Wolverhampton) DJ Mark: “What is the nationality of the Pope?”

Ruth from Rowley Regis: “I think I know that one. Is it Jewish?”

• University Challenge Bamber Gascoyne: “What was Gandhi’s first name?”

Contestant: “Goosey?”

• GWR FM (Bristol) Presenter: “What happened in Dallas on November 22, 1963?”

Contestant: “I don’t know, I wasn’t watching it then.”

• Phil Wood Show (BBC Radio - Manchester) Phil: “What is 11 squared?”

Contestant: “I don’t know.”

Phil: “I’ll give you a clue.

It’s two ones with a two in the middle.”

Contestant: “Is it five?”

• Richard and Judy Richard: “Which American actor was married to Nicole Kidman?”

Contestant: “Forrest Gump.”

• Richard and Judy Richard: “On which street did Sherlock Holmes live?”

Contestant: “Err…” Richard: “He makes bread.”

Contestant: “Err…” Richard: “He makes cakes.”

Contestant: “Kipling Street?”

• Lincs FM phone-in Presenter: “Which is the largest Spanish-speaking country in the world?”

Contestant: “Barcelona.”

Presenter: “I wanted the name of a country.”

Contestant: “I’m sorry, I don’t know the names of any countries in Spain.”

• National Lottery (BBC1) Question: “What is the world’s largest continent?”

Contestant: “Is it the Pacific?”

• Rock FM (Preston) Presenter: “Name a film starring Bob Hoskins that is also the name of a famous painting by Leonardo da Vinci.”

Contestant: “Who Framed Roger Rabbit?”

• The Biggest Game in Town (ITV)

Steve Le Fevre: “What was signed to bring World War I to an end in 1918?”

Contestant: “Magna Carta?”

• James O’Brien Show James: “How many kings of England have been called Henry?”

Contestant: “Err, well, I know there was a Henry the Eighth. Err... three?”

• Chris Searle Show (BBC Radio Bristol) Chris: “In which European country is Mount Etna?”

Caller: “Japan.”

Chris: “I did say which European country, so in case you didn’t hear, I can let you try again.”

Caller: “Err… Mexico?”

• Paul Wappat (BBC Radio Newcastle) Paul: “How long did the Six-Day War between Egypt and Israel last?”

Contestant (long pause): “Fourteen days.”

• Daryl Denham’s Drivetime (Virgin Radio) Daryl: “In which country would you spend shekels?”

Contestant: “Holland?”

Daryl: “Try the next letter of the alphabet.”

Contestant: “Iceland?

Ireland?”

Daryl: (helpfully): “It’s a bad line. Did you say Israel?”

Contestant: “No.” • Phil Wood Show (BBC GMR) Phil: “What ‘K’ could be described as the Is-

lamic Bible?”

Contestant: “Err...”

Phil: “It’s got two syllables… Kor…” Contestant: “Blimey?”

Phil: “Ha-ha-ha-ha, no.

The past participle of run…”

Contestant: (Silence) Phil: “Ok, try it another way. Today I run, yesterday I…?”

Contestant: “Walked?”

• The Vault Melanie Sykes: “What is the name given to the condition where the sufferer can fall asleep at any time?”

Contestant: “Nostalgia.”

• Lunchtime Show (BRMB) Presenter: “What religion was Guy Fawkes?”

Contestant: “Jewish.”

Presenter: “That’s close enough.”

• Steve Wright in the Afternoon (BBC Radio 2) Wright: “Johnny Weissmuller died on this day.

Which jungle-swinging character clad only in a loin cloth did he play?”

Contestant: “Jesus.”

• University Challenge (BBC2) Jeremy Paxman: “What is another name for ‘cherrypickers’ and ‘cheesemongers’?”

Contestant: “Homosexuals.”

Jeremy Paxman: “No. They’re regiments in the British Army - who will be very upset with you.”

SOCIAL SCENE

15 March 2017

CXPRESS

LIVE TO RIDE AND RIDE TO LIVE: Over 160 Harley Davidson riders from all over the country descended on Plettenberg Bay last weekend, to take part in the Garden Route 2017 Two Passes Rally. The event - an annual rally that took place in Wilderness last year - was held at The Dunes Resort en route to Keurboomstrand, and local restaurants Enrico’s, LM in Plett, The Peppermill, and Moby’s participated in a ‘Poker Run’ on the Friday and Saturday. Plett Tourism supported the event and the rally was hailed as a great success by riders, with calls for Plett to host the jorl again next year. The organising riders wish to thank all local businesses and individuals, as well as sponsors, vendors and suppliers who supported the event, especially The Dunes, whose organisation and standard was first class. The Garden Route Harley Davidson Group also thanks all individual riders and rider affiliations who backed the rally.

TAP THAT TALENT: Well-know local musicians and music teachers Marie Skeen, seated, and Tessa Kay Scott are collaborating this year to present a first time Arts and Culture Eisteddfod for Plettenberg Bay. Marie and Tessa would like to encourage individuals and groups of all ages and from all communities, that are involved in performance and visual arts, as far as Knysna and The Crags, to enter and showcase their talent. Singers, musicians, dancers and artists, now is the time to tap into your energy and passion and show CX Country what you can do. The Eisteddfod will take place during the month of August - email culture@ greenwoodbaycollege.co.za for details.

Photo: Emma Rourke

BILLIE’S DELIGHTFUL ‘BEACH’ PARTY: Congrats to ‘Billie from the Bos’, who hosted a marvellous shindig to celebrate her birthday on March 4 with friends dressed up to suit the sweltering conditions on the day, complete with cocktails, a slip n slide, and pets aplenty taking part in the festivities. Here’s to a great many more happy years of fun in the sun, sistah!

People, places & events

‘THE FUTURE’ PART OF OAKHILL FINALS LINEUP: The Sakhuluntu Arts Group from Knysna - pictured at left during their high-energey performance - are vibrant finalists in the Tshisa Talent Competition 2017, which will be held at Oakhill School on Saturday March 25, thanks to the support of the National Arts Council and Knysna Municipality.

Sakhuluntu means ‘The Future’ and the success of our youth is certainly an integral part of Knysna’s bright future.

This is the first time the competition will be held in Knysna and it will be well worth supporting the event, which will showcase some great acts as well as celebrity judges and entertainers who will be announced soon. See the advert on the back page for additional information.

As far as Bitou entertainment goes, diarise Plett Rotary’s Quiz Night at Goose Valley tonight from 7pm.

Entry is R100 per person and includes snacks and prizes. Please phone Emma on 044 533 0889 if you haven’t reserved your table yet.

And don’t forget about the Shamrock Dance on Saturday night from 8pm at the White House.

Tickets at R300 each are available at The Old House Shop, or call Ann Fermor on 082 452 8764 to find out more about this evening of St Patrick’s Day fun on March 18.

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CXPRESS

15 March 2017

Paws

Plett Animal Welfare Service

CLASSIFIEDS

ON THE SOAPBOX

15 March 2017

Letters to the Editor

Email: editor@cxpress.co.za - Fax: 044 533 0852 - PO Box 1449, Plett 6600

Keep your head down when commandos The Strombolis Village lected behind the scenes, pull into town bus is parked in the disa- like all the shop’s other ‘Concerned consumer’ ANTHONY TUFFIN of Plett entertained us no end with his sharp observations, which we gladly share with readers as a life-and-death-serious - if delightfully tongue-in-cheek - cautionary note…

The armoured car pulls up to the curb. Two heavilyarmed men step out. Team member Two, big and burley, a 45 magnum pistol clutched in his steely grip, hammer cocked, is ready for any sign of attack.

Team member One, Commando Joe, automatic machine rifle, two ammo magazines taped together for maximum fire power, is ready for battle.

Both are wearing top of the range protective gear, bulletproof vests, webbing that French Foreign Legion soldiers would have killed to own.

Number Three, The Cash Man, enters the front entrance of the bank to do the drop. Radios crackle into life. “All clear here, hoe lyk dit daar?” asks Commando Joe. “Skoon,” replies Number Two. This isn’t the film set of “Boetie op Manoeuvres”; I’m at a bank in Plett, queueing with five or six other loyal bank customers waiting to use the ATM machines.

I’m wearing my favourite Beach Boys T-shirt and board shorts, while 80-year-old Mrs Smith sports her best floral frock.

No protective gear for any of us, no sir, we’re just plain folk, all hoping to do our banking transactions in relative safety.

Commando Joe is tucked in behind a pillar, Number Two standing in the corner.

We’re his human shield, his steely eyes peeled for any sign of attack.

How safe are we standing here, Commando Joe and Number Two both being prime targets in the event of a cash heist mere inches from us? One hears of innocent bystanders injured and killed in the crossfire. Hello! Recipe for disaster…

Commando Joe, Number Two, and The Cash Man finish their business at the banks and move off, only to double back their armoured car smack-bang outside the main entrance to Pick n Pay. Number Four, the driver, sweats his butt off in the armoured car, ignoring all the motorists trying to squeeze past while Commando Joe and Number Two take up positions between the crowded old-age bench and Oom Piet eating the pie he just purchased.

Bricky’s bad luck brings memories of long-ago laughs How lovely to read that bricklayer’s lament again after all these years [turn to page 8 of the March 8 edition at www.cxpress.co.za].

In the 1950s, it was regularly played on BBC Radio (before TV), but it was very dif-

ferent to the version on your Interval page.

Gerard Hoffnung entertained the Oxford Union in ‘58 (Google it) and, using well-timed pauses, got many a laugh on the (broken?) back of the hapless bricky.

John Johnson, by email

From the edge of Kranshoek, Roodefontein, and Africa Before the advent of our dedicated fire-fighters, airplane ‘spotters’, two-way radios, and cellphones in the ‘dark ages’ before I had Eskom and municipal water - residents may recall a terrible fire that swept through our beautiful coastal property for weeks and weeks.

Here is an extract from my scribblings entitled ‘Love thy Neighbour’, about my beloved neighbours - my only neighbours for many years: the Griquas of Kranshoek…

‘A bakkie, loaded with weary workers return-

ing home to Kranshoek, came to a standstill.

Leaping off and throwing down their tool-kits, the workers began to run.

“Where are you going?” people yelled.

“Mrs Leggat needs our help!”

They came running through the edge of the blazing forest, which the Plett Fire Department was trying unsuccessfully to extinguish.’

All these many years later, I salute you - valiant volunteers. You may have forgotten, but I have not.

Dawn Leggat, Plett

bled parking, Yahoo, it’s pensioners day - slowmoving targets in the event of a cash heist!

Are there special laws allowing cash-in-transit vehicles to park where they like?

If I double-parked outside the main entrance, mommy going in to do shopping and me standing next to my bakkie with my 12-bore shotgun firmly in my grasp, I would surely be kneedeep in the dwang.

The cash should be col-

deliveries and collections, thereby keeping innocent folk out of harm’s way.

Banks should have an area where the handling of loot by cash-in-transit companies is done behind secure gates. Criminals target banks, supermarkets, and areas where big bucks get collected.

Why should we as innocent consumers be in the line of fire in the event of a heist? It was our money in the first place, so should we really be expected to suffer a second robbery?

An answer to Knysna’s water questions This letter to the editor is short and not so sweet. I have two questions for Knysna mayor Eleanore Bouw-Spies: • How much water is the reverse osmosis plant contributing to Knysna’s needs?

• If we have the second largest desalination plant in the country, why do we have permanent water restrictions?

‘Richard of Knysna’ Response from Mayor Eleanore Bouw-Spies: I thank the resident for

voicing these concerns.

Please find the response to the two questions below: • The reverse osmosis plant is currently out of operation for maintenance. In the peak season it produced just under 1,000,000 (1Ml/day).

• Due to the running costs of desalinated water, this plant was not designed as a full augmentation scheme, but as an emergency augmentation scheme - meaning it will only cater for Knysna’s basic human needs.

Speed trapping by camera does nothing for safety Speed trapping by camera in Plett and Knysna is being done by a private company called TMT, with the assistance of the towns’ respective traffic departments. The municipalities then share the spoils of this lucrative business.

If this was done in the interests of road safety, I would have no objection.

Unfortunately, these traps are not set where dangers exist, but where the most revenue can be generated.

Mobile cameras on Robberg Road and Piesang Valley close to the vet clinic are deliberately placed in such a manner that they are obscured by shrubs and are only visible when you are about to be filmed.

A tripod camera which is regularly placed on the N2 opposite New Horizons is placed at the foot of a traffic sign in order to render it invisible.

Now the latest extremely lucrative position for a mobile camera is at the bottom of Odlands Street behind Plett’s Spur.

The speed limit there is 40km/h. You have to be on your brakes all the way down the hill to try to keep within this limit.

The fact that the road is wide and quite safe at 60km/h makes no matter,

as long as the trapping is profitable. I have previously heard from Bitou Traffic Department that Odlands was designed with a 40km/h speed limit in mind. I would love to see this in black and white.

I may drive down Main Street at 60km/h, but it is not safe for motorists and pedestrians at 20km/h.

This makes no sense.

By the way, the manner in which speed trapping is done down Odlands does not conform to regulations pertaining to speed trapping. I will most definitely not be paying any fines I may get for speeding down the Odlands hill, and look forward to a summons to appear in court and prove their illegality.

Unfortunately in the interim, a lot of motorists will be paying admission of guilt fines for speed fines issued illegally.

Motorist, Plett (The author of this letter furnished CXPRESS with a recent article, pertaining to speed cameras in Nelson Mandela Bay that left the municipality’s traffic department at the centre of a police probe, to bolster his claims. Google ‘Metro in hot water over fines debacle’ to read the report. - Eds.)

CXPRESS

Read CXPRESS online at www.cxpress.co.za

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SPORT & ADVENTURE

15 March 2017

GS challengers gun for Mongolia in sweltering Storms River sun Words & photos: Watty Watson

HE BMW GS Trophy 2018 Regional Qualifying event (www.gstro phy.co.za) took place in picturesque Storms River Village on March 11, when highly-skilled bikers converged on this quaint Tsitsikamma hamlet.

The weather played along nicely - some might say too nicely, as it was a scorcher of close to 40-degrees - thus luring a substantial crowd of spectators, who arrived from all corners of the Garden Route and further afield.

It could not possibly have been particularly ‘nice’ for the participants, each of whom had to be fully clad in their biking gear as per the rules of the event: helmet, gloves, boots, and the all-important padded pants and jackets. Safety first.

The event’s various categories test riding skills and technique, based on an intermediate level of off-road riding. Too many to mention here, the first discipline on trial was a timed kettie-shooting competition to see who could hit a can with a

T

marble at 10m…

Needless to say, all competitors had to attempt this challenge in full regalia - not so easy to load and aim when sporting helmet and gloves.

Regrettably, no one hit the can. But one bloke came close when he threw the marble at the can in frustration, to the hooting delight of the crowd.

Most of the events focus on balance, throttle/ clutch control, correct body position, basic offroad riding abilities, and the essential emergency braking technique.

All these skills were tested to the limit in the piping hot and trying conditions of last Saturday but suffice to say, a great day was enjoyed by participants and spectators alike.

• All regional events lead to the World GS Challenge, i.e. winners are selected for the South African team to compete in Mongolia next year.

Allow me to say, us SAfricans win there more often than not, annoying the Germans who are all but happy when beaten - with their very own top of the range bikes - by a bunch of South Africans…

SLINGSHOT SISTAH: Debbie Bruyns from Lynn Schroeder Motors in George was the only female competitor in Storms, and is here aiming at the can with her kettie - an action not greatly facilitated by the fact that she’s clad in full regalia, nor by the 40-degree heat…

MONGOLIA WANNABES: Saturday’s stint in Storms River Village served as regional qualifying round for the GS Trophy 2018 in Mongolia - pictured here from left are Joel Epstein (Continental Cars PE), Riaan Keyser (2nd place), Raymond Botha (Lynn Schroeder George), SP Dreyer (1st), James Fitzhenry (3rd), and Pierre Moolman (4th)

Trailing through Addo at 44 degrees… in the shade!

Addo Elephant Park was the stomping ground for trailies fit - or mad - enough to tackle any one of three routes offered during the park’s annual trail run on March 10 and 11, over 100 miles (160km), 76km, or 44km. Designed to test runners both mentally and physically, all trails tracked the mountains and valleys of the pretty park. What a local contingent of contenders didn’t bargain on was that they’d tackle this challenge through the Eastern Cape bushveld in temperatures of up to 40 degrees Celsius! Hats off to these finishers - from left are Plett trail buddies Lourika Pienaar, Petrus Maree, Daniël Cloete, Monica Taylor, and Kyle Smith. Special mention, too, to father and son team Mike and Devon van Vuuren, who completed the 76km race.

A grateful Jo-Anne van Vuuren welcomed her boys at the finish, after massaging many an athlete in pain en route.

KAROO VIEW

COTTAGES

www.karooview.co.za

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