Design the Lifestyle YOU Desire - Autumn 2015

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Create Wealth in ALL aspects of YOUR Life!

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IN THIS ISSUE 15 Signs You’re Doing Well In Life Even Though You Don’t Think So

18 Signs You're Exactly Where You Should Be in Life (Even If It Doesn’t Feel Like It)

The Key to a Successful Life is to Love Yourself

A Simple Practice To Help You Sleep Easier, Feel Happier & More

Creating a Cosy Corner for Fall 7 Tips To Make Your Home A Mini Mindfulness Retreat


Rose Hill Designs by Heather Stillufsen


Welcome to Autumn edition of Design the Lifestyle YOU Desire! Magazine! I hope you’re having a wonderful start to the Autumn! As we have reached the last quarter of the year, our resolve to maintain focus on our goals can sometimes waiver. At the start of the year, it was likely you said you’d allow yourself more time to focus on your own needs. When was the last time you invested in self-care? This month’s issue focuses on ways you can start to take care of yourself and begin to love the woman you are! I hope after reading this issue, you will start making time for you and you alone! Stay tuned for my Design the Lifestyle YOU Desire’s Weekly Podcast Show - took a little break over the summer but will be back next week! You can listen to the previous shows them here. This issue provides principles, inspiration and motivation to help you on this journey and enables you to truly accept yourself by adopting lifechanging techniques that improve self-esteem and self-confidence. If you need a little ’push’, feel free to book a #FREE 20 minute coaching session with me so you can finally accept yourself once and for all and begin living the life you really want and deserve! Until next time; Design the Lifestyle YOU Desire! and Create Wealth in ALL aspects of YOUR Life!

Kiran x PS. Did I tell you that there is a Design the Lifestyle YOU Desire! Members Club? Join here! Cover page by HomeSense

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15 Signs You’re Doing Well In Life Even Though You Don’t Think So Let’s face it, sometimes life feels like it’s falling apart at the seams. Perhaps you’ve lost your job, or your marriage just ended, or you failed to pass an exam and now you are simply feeling helpless and defeated. Winston Churchill once said: "Success consists of going from failure to failure without loosing enthusiasm.” Today I want to remind you why, even though you may be feeling a bit like a failure, you are most definitely not. Here are 15 signs that show you are doing well in life even though you don’t think so! You’ve lived and learned

impacted me the most about this story was their sleeping arrangeNo one said life was easy and while ments: they all laid on the dirt floor, the bumps on the road may hurt, and at night if it rained everyone the ride is definitely worth it. Think would have to get up, grab whatback to your failures and defeats. ever was left of their "bed” and You must know they were all for a move to a dry spot. This story gave reason and part of a grander me a whole new appreciation for plan. Each difficulty has led you to my bed and I hope it does the where you are at today, each trial same thing for you! has moulded you into the magnificent, resilient, person that you are. You strive to be better Continue to move forward in faith, hope and love, knowing that each The fact you are feeling a bit down experience has taught you what because you haven’t achieved you need to become who you what you want to achieve shows were born to be. you are trying. In the grand scheme of things, you always strive You have a comfy bed to sleep in to be better and for as long as you continue to do that, happiness, I’ll never forget an interview done success and love will come – just on NPR a while back. A young Haidon’t give up. Einstein once said: tian mother told her story. She had "It’s not that I am so smart, it’s that I little ones that constantly wonstay with problems longer.” Hang in dered when they would be able to there and never stop striving to be eat and go to school like all the all you can be! other kids around them. What


You have/had a job

never an accident. It is always the result of high intention, sincere efWhichever way you look at this fort, and intelligent execution; it one, it is still a win-win situation for represents the wise choice of many you. If you have a job: kudos! Keep alternatives – choice, not chance, at it and know that you are richly determines your destiny.” Need I blessed. If you recently lost your say more? Claim your power to job, don’t fret! You’ve gotten a job choose. before, you can get one all over again. Perhaps this is the opportuYou’ve experienced love butterflies nity you’ve been waiting for to do or something like it something you truly love to do. Keep searching, keep hoping, and Ahh! To be in love…to feel your know that you can accomplish the whole body literally react to that seemingly impossible if you work moment when you simply steal a hard and believe you can. glance from the one you are infatuated with. Experiencing such a Knowledge is at your fingertips natural, basic and simple, yet passionate moment will give you In this day and age, you can learn memories that will last a life time. anything and everything you want. You are beyond blessed to have Knowledge is truly at your fingerexperienced such a sublime motips! Since knowledge is power, ment! seize that power and let it assist you in the pursuit of your dreams. Take You have clean water advantage of all the "learning” opportunities that come your way. This one should not be overlooked. Do you ever watch Bear Grills and You have food to eat all his desperate moves to get just a few ounces of muddy water? Sometimes a bit more than you There are also people who aren’t should! Food is such an overlooked going without water because they blessing, yet if you miss it for a few have a survival show, but instead hours you start feeling the necessity because it is their harsh reality. of it. Take the time to enjoy your Around 783 million people do not next meal, whatever that is, savor have access to clean water each bite and remind yourself that around the globe. Be thankful and happiness is found in enjoying the fully aware that you are doing well simple things of life, such as eating in life even if you don’t think so. a piece of pie. You have the power of choose Aristotle once said: "Excellence is

You have a dream Whatever your dream is, it’s yours.


You have the ability to embrace it and create it. Don’t give up on dreaming or on your dreams. They are what life’s best things are made up of. Your happiness is real You have the power to choose happiness for your life in everything you do and in every circumstance. Your happiness is defined by whether or not you are able to discern and seize an opportunity to feel happy. It may be something as simple as enjoying the laughter of a child. You have clothes to wear And sometimes too many options, which trumps your productivity, but that is another subject. The bottom line is, you don’t have to go naked through the streets or poorly dressed. You enjoy the blessing of being properly dressed for every occasion and have the ability to shield your body from the elements. Really, life would get very cold without clothes.

nightmare to move on with life when difficulties arose. You have the unique gift of forgiving and moving on. You believe in something greater than yourself For all the times you were so caught up in your own little world and drowning in a kiddie pool version of life’s problems, you’ve had the ability to step back and realize that you have something greater to live for than yourself. Whether it is God, your family or friends, you can believe that your purpose is to achieve something that will be for the greater good or to simply bring honour to your God. You have the opportunity to build global friendships

In today’s day and age, your best friend can literally be five thousand miles away yet you can still experience the beauty of that friendship. You have the unique capacity to be acquaintances with one person in almost every country of the world, something no other generaYou have the ability to forgive tion before the 1900’s was easily able to do. As far as I am conCan you imagine what this world cerned, your global ability to make would look like without forgiveness? friends is definitely a sign you are Never mind the world, just your life! doing well in life, even if you don’t Imagine how bogged down, bitter think so. and unhappy you would be if you did not have the ability to forgive Via MindBodyGreen other’s mistakes as well as your own. It would make it nearly impossible to live and most definitely a


18 Signs You're Exactly Where You Should Be in Life (Even If It Doesn’t Feel Like It) Whether it’s to lose weight, earn more money, or find your soul mate, trying to reach our goals can feel like a chore. We keep reaching for something outside of ourselves, which makes us feel like we aren't where we should be. We spend so much time trying to get to the next goal that many of us miss the journey and forget how important the process is. In my new book Adventures for Your Soul, I share a process that helped me relax into the journey of life, rather than pushing uphill and trying to make things happen.

What if you're actually exactly where you should be, even if it doesn't feel like it? Most people feel as if something is missing and their life is off track. But we can reverse this. What if you're actually doing a lot better at life than you give yourself credit for? Consider that everything you’ve ever experienced has prepared you for who you are now and who you are yet to become.

If you feel like you're struggling to figure it out, give yourself a little more credit. You are exactly where you should be, and here are 18 signs to remind you: 1. You wake up in the morning happy and excited to live your day.


Rose Hill Designs by Heather Stillufsen


2. You’ve let go of trying to find 12. You are working on releasing your purpose and instead live each expectations of how things are supposed to turn out; instead you recday on purpose. ognize that everything happens for 3. You often celebrate how far you, not to you. you’ve come instead of focusing 13. You see beauty in everything on how far you still need to go. and everyone. 4. You see that failures are often 14. You’ve stopped waiting for the successes in disguise. breakthrough and see that each 5. You relish the possibilities and en- mini moment matters most. joy exploring the unknown. 15. You are OK with not knowing. 6. You can see setbacks as opportunities for realignment to steer you 16. You know that difficult roads in a new life direction. lead to divine destinations. 7. You are incredibly thankful for everything in your life. 8. You treat yourself kindly with compassion and respect.

17. You prioritize your health and your own happiness. You realize that nothing else can work right until you do.

18. You’ve discovered that the 9. You’ve stopped trying to change journey is more rewarding than the people or get them to see your destination. perspective. Instead you appreciBy ShannonKaiser, MindBodyGreen ate everyone for who they are in each moment. 10. You’ve stopped comparing yourself to others (or at least you try) and you can celebrate the successes of others. 11. You follow your heart and let your dreams guide your life.


Rose Hill Designs by Heather Stillufsen


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The Key to a Successful Life is to Love Yourself If you want to find the key to happiness, success and abundance, you need to start by evaluating your own opinion of yourself. It’s not always easy to appreciate the hard work you put in every day, the difference you make in the lives of others, and the distance you’re willing to go to make your dreams come true. If it were easy, then everyone would do it, but before you even begin to think about things such as success and failure, you need to come to know yourself, and then you need to learn to love yourself. to understand more about your purpose in life, you need to turn inward, not outward. Turning outward will cause you to submit to the pressures of the world and be a person that you aren’t meant to It’s not easy, because as the saying be, but reflecting inward will goes, "we are all our own worst connect you with your true self, critics.” That saying, though it may and if you follow your instincts you be cliché, is absolutely correct. We will never be led astray. find it difficult to love ourselves because we witness every mistake we make, every personality flaw we carry, every selfish tendency we possess, and we also are the one who knows exactly what we The more you reflect inward, the are capable of. more you will learn about yourself, and through that learning you will Learning to love yourself is not something that happens overnight, come to appreciate what you have to offer the world. You will it is learned through experience realize that you are stronger, more and effort. Too often society intelligent, and more talented than teaches us that we need to look you have ever imagined. You will outside ourselves to find out who we really are, but I think the exact feel moved to share your gifts with the world, and over time that will opposite is true. If you really want

Why is it Challenging to Love Ourselves?

How to Love Yourself


Rose Hill Designs by Heather Stillufsen


transform you into an unselfish person who knows what it means to find success.

make any important decisions. Don’t make decisions based on the opinions of others, make decisions that are right for you. Over time If the idea of loving yourself you will love yourself more for being wholeheartedly is foreign to you, try willing to trust. taking the following steps and see what kind of difference it makes:

#3: Make Time to #1: Forgive Yourself do Things you for Past and Future Love! The most successful people in the Mistakes world rarely have a difficult time Each one of us will make mistakes every day, so you might as well forgive yourself now and get it over with it. Once you learn to forgive yourself of mistakes and move forward, you will be better in control of your emotional state, which will allow you to continue pushing toward your goals of success when mistakes and failures do come up. And here’s a secret: they will always come up!

#2: Put Your Own Needs First Every Once in a While Each one of us has our own personal needs, but usually we get too caught up taking care of the needs of others to make time to take care of ourselves. If you want to build more confidence and have positive feelings toward yourself, you need to ask yourself "Is this what I really want?” before you

with their work, because they are involved in things they are deeply passionate about. You can take this same attitude with your life. If you aren’t doing things you love on a routine basis, what is the purpose of living? Of course, make sure you have time to attend to all of your responsibilities, but always leave extra time for the things you love most.


A Simple Practice To Help You Sleep Easier, Feel Happier & More Essential oils are a mainstay in my life. Whether to calm cramps or anxiety, sleep or breathe better, or regulate body temperature, I use essential oils to bring me to my healthiest here and now. Learning about essential oil therapy — aromatherapy — is as intricate as any discipline, and if you’ve been drawn to aromas even the littlest bit, I encourage you to follow your senses and seek out trusted aromatherapy pioneers to better understand this world of wellness.


But you don’t need to make aromatherapy education a hobby in order to benefit from healing properties of essential oils. Here are six ways to use essential oils right now:

under deadline or before getting behind the wheel of a car.

4. For a jolt of inspiration ...

... try placing frankincense, rose, neroli or sandalwood on the crown of your head. The 7th chakra (the crown ... place a couple drops of essential oil chakra) is located on the top of your (lavender, clary sage, lemongrass) on skull and is considered the place a tissue. Move the tissue beneath your through which we connect with higher power and good. A drop of essential nose from one nostril to the other. Passing it back and forth beneath your oil on the crown of your head can provide inspiration to transform an nose will give you a complete experience. experience of the aroma and its benefits. Favour this tissue method over placing essential oils directly on skin 5. To open your chest and before bed as essential oils are breathe easier ... stimulating and can wake you from sleep if worn on your body. ... dot essential oils along your collarbone to bring consciousness and 2. For headache relief ... awareness to your throat, shoulders and chest. The scent and sensation will ... blend a combination of lavender, prompt you to lengthen your peppermint and camomile essential collarbone, opening space for your oils, and apply to the temples (these lungs and encouraging you to breathe oils have anti-inflammatory and deeper. Aromas like lavender and soothing properties). Additionally, eucalyptus are famous for this, but you black pepper oil helps with headaches can combine those with others that by dilating blood vessels, thereby smell good to you like cardamom, relieving tension and allowing blood to vanilla, lime or cinnamon. flow freely.

1. For a better night's sleep ...

3. To reduce stress ... ... try tapping essential oils beneath your hairline along the back of your neck. This will also help bring your body into alignment and your mind into focus. Oils like ylang ylang, jasmine and lavender are good for reducing stress whereas basil, rosemary and grapefruit help with mental clarity. This is a great treatment when working

6. For all-day benefits ... ... apply oils on your wrists or hands. The underside of your wrist is a great place for oils that help regulate body temperature like clove, ginger or vetiver to warm and fir, mint or lavender to cool. You can also massage oils between your thumb and forefinger — your hands move along your body and in front of your face all day, so you'll get pleasant whiffs of the scent


throughout the day. Remember: You only need a drop or two of any essential oil to experience therapeutic benefits. Essential oils are potent, so it's important to dilute them a bit before applying to skin to prevent irritation. If you want to blend your own, combine essential oils with a carrier oil like jojoba, castor or almond oil in a ratio of one-part essential oil to four-parts carrier oil. As you embrace aromatherapy and begin customizing blends for your tastes and needs, experiment with scenting your own body oils, hair rinse and homemade cleaning products. You’ll feel like a modern day alchemist! By Sitarani Palomar, MBG | Photo Credit: Shutterstock


Rose Hill Designs by Heather Stillufsen


Rose Hill Designs by Heather Stillufsen


MY UNIQUE HOME

Because everyone deserves a Healthy & Happy Home :)


Creating a Cosy Corner for Fall I don't know about you, but I'm getting excited for fall! During the evenings of the fall and winter months, you can often find me keeping warm by my fireplace with a hot drink in hand and a cosy blanket on my lap. I believe everyone should have a few spots in their home that are their 'go-to comfort spot.' Even in a small house, you can find one corner to call your own! Try adding some of these elements to create your own cosy corner :

A Comfy Chair Put a comfortable chair in your corner that you’ll love to sit in. If you have space, add an ottoman in front to put your feet up and relax!

A Warm Light Having a lamp in your corner will add instant character and warmth. A table or reading lamp are essentials for any seating area.


A Cosy Throw I love to have a basket of warm throw blankets nearby. Not only are they nice to have around if it gets extra chilly, but the baskets and blankets add a nice texture to my home even when they’re not in use!

A Favourite Scent If you love good scents like I do, you’ll want to have a favourite candle near your cosy corner! I love using vanilla candles in the fall and winter.

A Favourite Drink I don't know about you, but for me, hot drinks and cold months go hand and hand. I love to put a drink in a favourite mug and set it on a small garden stool by my chair.

A Book to Read I keep a stack of favourite books nearby ready to read or get inspired by.


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Passion for Food One of the things I LOVE about cooking is that cooking a meal is one of the most personal and intimiate things you can do for someone. You're literally providing plated nourishment made with your own hands and creativity - even if you're following a recipe, you picked the recipe and planned the meal didn't you? The speciality about a home cooked meal is the feeling of abundance it provides, everything you have and need is right in the front of you within arms reach. The fragrance of garlic, the crackle from the skillet, end the sight of perfectly roasted bird coming out from the oven....DIVINE! Cooking speaks to all of my senses. It's a joy I'm so proud to know!


7 Tips To Make Your Home A Mini Mindfulness Retreat

O

nce a month, I conduct my very own mini-mindfulness retreat at

home with a day of mindful activities, in total silence. A day of at-home mindfulness offers the opportunity to be with ourselves and our emotions, in a place that feels safe. It retrains the mind to be present and gives the body time to unwind.


The benefit to having a retreat at home is that it's free and you can repeat it as often as you like. The only downside is that you will be surrounded by the regular distractions of your home, so you will need to exercise a certain degree of willpower. I usually give myself the luxury of a weekend retreat which I start on a Saturday (I drop my daughter off at her grandma’s house after school on Friday and come back home in the evening). I switch off my phone, tablet and laptop. I start my morning with a glass of warm water with freshly squeezed lemon juice while standing in the door breathing in fresh air. I then go for a quick run :) Once back, I spend rest of the morning meditating — sometimes spending periods of time looking out of the window sipping a cup of my favourite tea (Earl Grey!) and noticing the colour of the flowers, the sounds of the birds, the shape of the clouds. For lunchtime I always prepare something that will nourish my body. I sit at the table to eat mindfully, and stop eating when I am full. After lunch, I might do some journaling, play my piano or do some gardening. I don’t read much, so this can easily lead to too much thinking. So to counteract that I'll do a session of mindful yoga, focusing on my breath. Come 3.30-4PM, I start preparing dinner—in this case comfort food. One of the things I LOVE about cooking is that cooking a meal is one of the most personal and intimate things you can do. The speciality about a home cooked meal is the feeling of abundance it provides, everything you have and need is right in the front of you within arms reach. Once I have indulged in my dinner, I go for a long walk while listening to a podcast or something inspirational. I come home, make myself a healthy dessert and watch a movie (did I say I LOVE movies?) One hour before bed-time, I transform my bedroom into a SPA (got an en-suite), I put on tranquil music, light a SPA candle and treat myself to facemask, manicure, pedicure and so on. Want to have your own mini-mindfulness retreat in your own home? On the next page are seven tips for a day (weekend) of mindfulness —->


.1 Wake and stretch. When you wake, stretch your body and when you get up really feel your feet connecting with the earth, the temperature of the carpet against the soles of your feet.

2. Shower mindfully. When you shower, notice the sound of the water, the temperature, the scent of your soap, the feel of your hands on your skin, the texture of the towel as you dry yourself.

3. Dress with awareness. When you dress, notice the colours you choose, the feel of the fabric against your skin, the movement of your limbs as you pull your clothes on.

4. Cook with love. Preparing food should be a pleasurable experience. Notice the temperature of the water as you wash your salad, hear the sound of the knife as it slices through peppers, feel the texture of the lettuce as you


shake it dry.

5. Savour every bite. When you eat, take the time to sit at a table. Look at your food as if seeing it for the very first time. How does it smell? Chew slowly, maybe using a different side of the mouth or teeth than what is habitual. And of course, stop eating when you are full.

6. Meditate. During a silent mindfulness day you should try to avoid speaking. When you take time for meditation, you can use a recorded, guided meditation if you need to. Otherwise, meditate in silence for as long as you like.

7. Move with mindfulness. You could practice yoga or go for a walk in nature. Try using a faster or slower pace than what is usual for you to help heighten your awareness of the present moment. Begin your retreat without expectations or goals. There is nothing to achieve. See what happens for you without casting judgement. If you feel tired afterward, don’t worry, this is normal after a period of time spent sitting with your emotions and allowing your mind and body to rest.


Interview with Gennaro Contaldo Last month I had the pleasure of meeting and interviewing the one and only Chef Gennaro Contaldo at a Pasta Masterclass for Bertolli! Describe yourself in 5 words. Italian, passionate, extrovert, loud, temperamental

What inspires you? Seeing the younger generation of chefs doing well. I am especially proud of Jamie (Oliver) and all he has achieved – I remember him so well when he was fresh out of catering college and came to me for a job in the kitchen - I taught him all I knew about Italian cooking because he was just so passionate and enthusiastic. Once he learned from me, now I learn from him. To me, this is inspira-

tion and makes all the hard work worth it. What is your background? I was born and brought up on the idyllic Amalfi Coast where I lived in the small village of Minori. My father was a linen dealer and my mum ran a shop. School didn’t play a big part in my life and I preferred to spend time fishing, hunting and foraging. In my late teens, the bright lights of London beckoned and I made it my home. In the ‘80’s I met Antonio Carluccio and worked at his Neal Street Restaurant before opening up my own restaurant, Passione, in central London.

What are the highlights of your career thus far? Running my own restaurant, filming and writing books – to see my recipes in beautiful books gives me so much joy.

Who taught you to cook? Food was all around me whilst I was growing up and everyone I knew cooked so it was second nature to me. My father taught me to hunt game, my mother taught me to recognise mushrooms & herbs and I often escaped to fish with the local fishermen.

What is your best tip for those who want to learn to cook? Don’t be afraid, experiment with different ingredients & combinations; if something doesn’t work out first time, try again and above all enjoy!


What are the top three things to consider while cooking Italian food? Seasonal produce, few ingredients and simplicity

What has been the most exciting collaboration you've worked on so far? I love everything I do, but travelling around Italy with Antonio Carluccio to film Two Greedy Italians was fun, exciting and of course, delicious! It was lovely to spend time with my old friend and revisit our beloved Italy together and show it off to our audiences.

What are you working on at the moment? Someone once called me "mille mestieri” (1000 jobs) and they were not wrong – I always have a lot on - I still put on my chef whites daily and get stuck in in the kitchens of Jamie’s Italian restaurants. I have just teamed up with Bertolli with Butter to help the UK show pasta some passion! We’re reinvigorating midweek meals, and I want to show how simple pasta dishes can be easily created….cooking authentic Italian shouldn’t be intimidating! I am also working

on a new cook book about baking, doing lots of videos for Food Tube. What do you have to say to the next generation, particularly for those hoping to follow in your footsteps? The hours are long, the stress can be high, but hard work, determination and a passion for creating good food pays off - there is nothing more satisfying than customers returning to your restaurant to enjoy your food.

Your approach focuses on seasonal ingredients, local ingredients, quality of produce, simplicity. Would you say that your approach is definitively Italian? This is definitely the Italian way – but I think this is changing in the UK too – there is much more emphasis on good, seasonal and local ingredients to make simple dishes that are healthy and enjoyed by all.

What is the best piece of advice you have been given? Go for it!


See you in December Until then;

Design the Lifestyle YOU Desire! & Create Wealth in ALL aspects of YOUR Life!


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