3 minute read
Divorce Education
Local attorney educates clients with ‘Our Family in Two Homes.’
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SUZANNE CHESSLER CONTRIBUTING WRITER
Alisa Peskin-Shepherd has faced divorce issues within her own family, and they motivated a career interest in assisting others coping with marriage dissolution problems.
In childhood, she was affected by divorce proceedings entered into by her mother, a remarried widow. In adulthood, her professional goals transitioned from social work into family law.
Gradually, after some 25 years in practice, PeskinShepherd again faced personal divorce issues and choices, this time calling an end to her own quarter-century of marriage.
When Peskin-Shepherd, the mother of two grown daughters, proceeded through family court nine years ago in her own behalf with representation by another attorney, she felt confident about approaching solutions because of her personal and professional experiences.
Working on behalf of others, she kept alert to new ways of educating and counseling clients who lacked the insights and resources she understood.
Two years ago, this attorney learned about an approach that resonated with her outlook and intent, and she became the first Michigan licensee for Our Family in Two Homes, a divorce education process. It combines workbook exercises completed individually by one or both spouses and three consulting sessions for each with an attorney.
“The idea that clients can educate themselves about the law and what their preferences, issues and conflict styles might be in advance of getting deeper into the negotiations really made sense to me,” said Peskin-Shepherd, whose private practice, Transitions Legal, is based in Bloomfield Hills while she also serves as a pro bono consultant for those seeking help through Jewish Family Service of Metro Detroit.
“Clients are always looking to save money, and the workbook allows them to do some work on their own. They can figure out the issues they need me to work on with them and what issues might need less focus.”
The program was developed under the leadership of Jacinta Gallant, a Canadian collaborative lawyer and mediator specializing in conflict resolution. Licensees have monthly Zoom meetings with her to discuss their personal experiences using the process.
Peskin-Shepherd divides major divorce issues into three categories — emotional, financial and legal. Impressed that Our Family in Two Homes addresses all three, she studied the method last year and has interested two clients now immersed in it.
“I belong to the International Academy of Collaborative Professionals, and every year we have an educational forum,” Peskin-Shepherd explained about her introduction to the program. “A workshop was about this resource package.
“Because I often work with individuals who are deciding whether to get a divorce, I recommend this approach since it can structure their time thinking about all that is involved. It gives them directions that might suggest their issues could be worked out so they don’t have to go ahead with the divorce.”
An example of an exercise has to do with recognizing values. Participants are provided with a series of cards that lead them to acknowledge what they value and how they apply those values while interacting with family members.
“It gives people a lot of insight,” said the attorney, also a mediator trained in collaborative divorce techniques, parts of a process outside of the courtroom with each client represented by a collaboratively trained attorney and supported by a team of specialists in the areas of mental health and finances.
In collaborative divorce, decisions are made around a conference room table with participants working together.
Peskin-Shepherd explained that considerations and procedures for a religious divorce in Judaism are separate from the civil divorces she handles. Outcomes in religious procedures are decided by rabbis with some attention to issues covered by civil laws.
“Most issues in any divorce case, whether civil or religious, stem from some kind of emotional issues,” said Peskin-Shepherd, a member of Congregation B’nai Moshe who participates in weekly Torah study. “If clients can identify those and get help with those, they can save money in the long run.
“Part of my mission is to educate other colleagues about the resource package to bring them on board. I can use the resource package with both clients when I am acting as a mediator.”
“Education helps people make decisions, and I believe this workbook can help identify goals and options while keeping their children in the forefront, which is most important.”
