PURELY COMMENTARY guest column
We Are One People
M
y friend Yehuda (not his real name) is one of the best souls I have ever met. When I see his name on my caller ID, a smile comes to my face, and I rush to answer because talking to him always makes Alicia Chandler my day better. His presence is infused with wisdom and thoughtfulness and kindness. If you asked him about me, I believe he would say similar kind words if for no other reason that the goodness within him allows him to see me in a more positive light than I probably deserve. Yet, conventionally, our
friendship is improbable. Yehuda is a self-identified ultra-Orthodox Jew. To label myself, I am an intermarried Jew that was raised as part of Secular Judaism at Workman’s Circle and now identify with the Reform Movement. Last month, Pew Research Center has come out with its most recent study of American Jewry. As a sociology Ph.D. student, I am thrilled to be diving into the data and understanding who makes up our community. But as a communal Jewish leader, I am frightened. Because studies such as Pew place labels on us, force us into binary choices and result in a seeming competition between the segments of Judaism, it can
reinforce the idea that we are a divided, polarized community. Are Yehuda and I in competition? In every aspect of our friendship, should we wear our respective labels of denominational difference? Are we unknowingly at war, fighting for the future of American Judaism? Well, that seems ridiculous. I honor Yehuda’s religiosity and commitment to Torah and Halachah (Jewish law). I have been enriched by his Jewish outlook on the world. I am a better person and a Jew because of our friendship. But even as I constantly grow within my faith, I am who I am. I am not halachically observant. I drive on Shabbat. I love a good cheeseburger.
Pew asked the participants how much they had in common with Jews from the various denominations. When Orthodox Jews were asked about how much they had in common with Reform Jews, 50% responded a lot or some. 48% responded not much or nothing at all. When the question was asked of Reform Jews, 39% said they had a lot or some in common with Orthodox Jews. And 60% said they had not much or nothing at all in common. At first, these numbers appalled me. As Jews, we definitionally have something in common with each other. But then I wondered, five years ago, before I became friends continued on page 8
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JULY 8 • 2021
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