A COMMON SENSE GUIDE TO ACHIEVING YOUR GOALS

We are in the 4th week in January already, and the time when most New Year’s resolutions have already failed; the “new year, new me” brigade have given up and it’s a time when most people are left thinking “…what’s the point of new year’s resolutions anyway?”

So much is said about the goal setting space, from a variety of different people and lots of these people have a huge bias- they are trying to sell something. The worst place for this is social media, where things can tend to get very negative indeed. Here are some of the things that we have seen which are a great example of the negativity related to goal setting:

• What’s your “why?” If you don’t have an audacious enough “why” then you won’t succeed.

• If you don’t succeed then you must lack motivation.

• If you’re not constantly hustling then you’re lazy.

• You must link your goals to your core values to be successful.

• You must have a 5 year plan or else you just aren’t focused enough.

• Once you achieve your goal, life will be perfect.

• The goal is the destination (what’s your end goal?)

• I can’t achieve my goal because I’m rubbish at…

• New Year’s resolutions rarely work –so what’s the point in them anyway?

These things all have something in common – they’re limiting, negative and unhelpful. Which is really not what you’re after when you’re planning for success and positive change. Let’s have a look at some facts behind the topic of goals:

• 92% of New Year’s resolutions will fail by 15th January.

• Carefully outlined goals, which can be measured and give specific timeframes are more effective.

• Voicing your goals or making a public commitment, substantially increases your chances of achieving them.

• Often, achieving a goal requires a sacrifice, maybe even an emotional one …

• Self-sabotage, Co-dependency and people who enable your bad habits – do you have any of these…are you aware of any of these in your relationship circle?

• The vast majority of goals require behavioural change.

• 40% of our daily behaviour is habitual.

• Habits are the compound interest of self-improvement.

• Our brains reward immediate returns (after I make that call/ write that email/ go to the gym I will…)

• Goals can be self-defeating – when I achieve my goal, how will I feel and what will be next?

The more we understand about ourselves, how our brains work and the environments which either work for us or against us, the more successful we will be in working towards our goals. Here are some top tips for success:

• Habit stacking. This is the process by which a new habit (or a new behaviour or goal that we want to achieve or implement) is placed alongside an existing habit. Remember that 40% of our daily behaviour is habitual, so by “stacking” a new habit alongside an existing one will give it more chance of success. For example, having your morning coffee whilst writing that email, brushing your teeth after putting your gym kit on – I’m sure that you can think of lots more of these that will be more relevant to you.

• Make things easy – the less friction the better (have your gym kit laid out the night before and put it within easy reach for the morning).

• Make it immediately satisfying (our brains like instant gratification) have your morning coffee on the way home from the gym.

• Make it attractive (what immediate small wins can you plan).

• Fall in love with the process (the selfpride zone).

• Encourage functional relationships – be honest about the people you surround yourself with.

• Be aware of the stories you tell yourself – “…I’m rubbish at…” and be in control of that inner voice.

• You reap the cost of your good habits today; your bad ones you will reap in the future (will your future-self thank you for your behaviours today?)

• Does my behaviour today move me towards or away from my goals?

• Clarity and specificity are important (don’t forget the detail).

• We experience peak motivation when working on the edge of our current abilities.

• Don’t forget to celebrate the wins –no matter how small the celebration.

• It’s easy to do the work when things are great, but it’s crucial to do the work when things are not.

• Being the type of person who… who will you become and how will this affect the stories you tell yourself?

So, making the process as easy as possible (take away any friction); adding some instant gratification; stacking new habits alongside existing ones; celebrating the wins; being mindful of the “self-talk” and becoming the “kind of person who…” are all great ways to make working towards your goals easier and more effective and, last but not least, don’t forget the following:

• The greatest threat to success is boredom.

• Pros stick to the schedule; amateurs let life get in the way.

• Consistency is key.

• Time is oxygen to your inner “neg head” – just do it; do it now!

• Employ some visualisation – what exactly do my goals look like to me?