Never Mind

don, England, in 1876. Subsequently, the first such rink in the United States was installed at the old Madison Square Garden in New York City in 1879. Throughout the 20th century, an increasing number of public rinks with artificially produced ice appeared. However, in the colder states, with their constant below-freezing temperatures, it is easy to lace up a pair of skates and hit the ice outdoors.

Although there is a seemingly endless number of frozen ponds, lakes, and indoor/outdoor rinks throughout Maine, here are some suggestions (in no particular order) in this part of the state. First, there is Stillwater Park Playground in Bangor. This playground turns into ice skating fun in late December when the weather permits. The lights at the park also allow for evening skating. Second, there is the Penobscot Ice Arena in Brewer. Home of the Brewer Witches and the Hampden Broncos, this indoor rink offers public skating as well as youth and adult hockey. Third, there is the Piscataquis County Ice Area in Dover-Foxcroft. This $5.5 million indoor arena offers everything from public skating to skating classes, youth, and adult hockey, and even curling. Fourth, there is the Bucksport Ice Rink. This outdoor rink, located at 29 Miles Lane is open from sunrise to 9 p.m. seven days a week. Finally, there is the Ellsworth Ice Rink. Located in Knowlton Park, this outdoor rink is managed by the Ellsworth Recreation Commission, and it temporarily closes for maintenance, due to the deer crossing the rink before the ice is solidly frozen.

Well, on this note, let me close with the following jest: A woman sits at a bar and orders a drink. The bartender grabs a glass, a handful of ice, and makes a drink. She says, “Ewww, I’m not drinking that! You touched the ice with your hands! Use the ice tongs!” The bartender replies, “Ma’am, my hands are in water all day and they are clean,” after which she says, “I don’t care! Use the ice tongs!” So, he makes another drink, carefully using the ice tongs. After she finishes her drink, she notices a string hanging off of the bartender’s fly. She asks, “Why is that string on your pants?” He says, I use it to unzip my pants when I go to the bathroom, so I don’t touch anything.” She ponders this and asks, “Well, how do you get it out of your pants?” He replies, “With the ice tongs.”