Contents What would you have brought? ................................04
- Pastor H. Al Sims, Jr. Interview With Foxy Rae Campbell
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Parenting Simplified - Doris Anetha Shelto McLennon
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The Purpose For Jesus’ Birth - Sharon Weeks-Alleyne
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The Extended Family - Athena Morrison
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Sophia Sparkle Youth Group Monthly Update - Doris Anetha Shelto McLennon
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This is just one gift - Apostle Dr. Meta E. James
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Mental Health Matters - Ebony Vaughan, LCSW-C
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Do You Know Your Name? - Patsy Benjamin
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Contributors Patsy Benjamin Apostle Dr. Meta E. James Athena Morrison Doris Anetha Shelto McLennon Pastor H. Al Sims, Jr. Ebony Vaughan, LCSW-C Sharon Weeks-Alleyne
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From the Desk of the Editor-in-Chief
Donna Royalty Ross It’s December 2021. The year is almost over. Wow, did the year fly? We have made it to December 2021. We must first acknowledge that we would not have made it without God in our lives. We set goals in the beginning of the year. How many of us have accomplished all of our goals? What if you didn’t accomplish all of your goals? Does that mean that God loves you any less? No He doesn’t. I pray that one of our accomplishments would have included seeing souls saved for the Kingdom of God. As we move forward, let us endeavor to be all that God has called and ordained for us to do and be. The same God that was faithful in January, February, March and all the other months leading up to December is going to continue to be faithful as we end this year. We have all lost loved ones, whether friends or family during this year, but God has kept us. Have you stopped and wondered why God has kept you through to December 2021? Could it be that your assignment is not completed yet? Could it be that you have souls yet to reach for the Kingdom of God? Could it be that you have to leave a spiritual and financial legacy for the generations to come? We ought to examine ourselves and ask God what He wants us to accomplish for His glory in December. All this while we’re asking the God of our universe to tell us what He wants us to accomplish in the year 2022. After all, you were bought with a price; your life is no longer your own — if Jesus Christ is your Lord and Savior. There’s going to be sad times ahead — according to the word of God — but there will also be great times ahead for the Kingdom of God. God is indeed moving by His Spirit and as children of the Most High God, we must purpose in our hearts to listen carefully so that we could make His name glorious in the earth realm. There is cancer to be healed or eradicated; there is the dead to raise; and there are massive healings to take place, if we would follow the Bible and boldly declare that where sin abounds, God’s grace much more abounds. Let’s end December on a great note. Then let’s listen attentively for the Word of God to make the year 2022—the year of God’s greatest miracles. Let us move forward allowing the Lord to use us.
Donna Royalty Ross
Walking in God’s Scandalous Grace 3
From the Pastor’s Desk:
What would you have brought?
Pastor H. Al Sims, Jr. SENIOR PASTOR OF BETHESDA CHURCH OF GOD, SUMTER, SC
Most of us have faced the gift-giving dilemma of trying to find the perfect gift for that hard-to-buy-for person. Think about it. We shop and shop and shop but somehow never seem to feel comfortable with any gift for that certain person. There are many possible reasons for this to happen. One reason may be that you simply do not have the money for the type of gift you think the person would expect. Another possibility is that the person that you are buying for is very picky and you are not sure what color, shape, size, or brand they would like. Then there is the problem that you really don’t know the person very well and you truly have no idea what their likes and dislikes are. That is when you fall back on the one-size-fits-all remedy and simply give cash. One downside to such an option is that you risk being thought of as uncaring, unthoughtful, or too lazy to go shop. How do you win! Many years ago, three men from the East followed a star that led them to where Jesus the Christ was living. In their curiosity or obedience, they came to this place and somehow knew that this was no ordinary human being. They had been following a star so at some point they must have realized that God was leading them to this special occasion. After their arrival, they must have felt a strong urge to give gifts of some sort but what should they give? You talk about a problem. They couldn’t run to the mall, or even shop on E-Bay, Amazon, or some of the conveniences that we have today. What could they give? What would be appropriate? What were they willing to offer? Well, the answer was Gold, Frankincense and Myrrh. Now that sounds like some high dollar gifts to me, but I would like for you to consider something deeper than the monetary value. They gave what they had! That is what Jesus has always liked the most. It doesn’t have to be expensive or elaborate but it needs to be what you have that you are willing to give Him. Here is the best part. When you give freely and from your heart as the Wise Men did, Jesus always gives back and gives more. There was a little boy that was willing to give his lunch for Jesus to use. Jesus took the loaves and the fish, blessed it, and then fed five thousand people. That little boy gave but got to eat also because of his willingness to give. So, I ask the question, what would you give if you had to come up with something to give Jesus? What do you have? How about your talents, giftings, money or special abilities? If you offer them from your heart, they will be accepted as precious in Jesus’ sight. Look deep and pick a great gift for the King of kings and the Lord of lords and remember you can’t out-give Him. Merry Christmas! 4
Interview with Foxy Rae Campbell
T4RM: Foxy, thank you for allowing me the pleasure of interviewing you for the T4realMagazine. Transformational 4Real is all about watching the lives of others being transformed. Transformation happens when a person or groups of individuals decide to stir themselves and move out of their comfort zone, like it is quoted in 2 Kings 7:3, saying, “Why sit we here and die?” Foxy, I see you doing just that for Sumter, South Carolina. Not only working to have more lower income families into homes but also work with the Seniors of Sumter. Let me tell our readers how I first met you and how awesome God is. I was training to become an Advocate for Abused and Neglected Children at Guardian Ad Litem and met your brother in the class. He was the only male in the class, and he seemed to know all the answers before the questions were asked, and I just felt the need to mess with him. Somehow, we got off in him helping my husband and I to buy a house. He was and still is a part of the mortgage aspect of real estate. He told me that his sister – that is, you – could help us get a house and the rest is history. Moreover, I have met and dearly love your mom. She is such a sweet spirit. However, tell our readers a little bit about yourself and Sumter. FRC: I am a perfect human being with many flaws, quirks and misunderstandings. As a believer in all things create by God Almighty, my life is fulfilled with family, friends, and the world I’m in. Every day, I’m learning something new about who I am, and what I bring to humanity. My environment evolves daily with thorns and blossoms that strengthen my outlook on life. I am a warrior of my beliefs and a teacher of my philosophies. I am true to who I am. Sumter is a county located in the midlands part of South Carolina. It has many townships and cities that make up this place. This town is full of farmers, small business owners and the military. We have a growing manufacturing industry. In the heart of Sumter County lies the fledgling City of Sumter where there is shopping, entertainment and much more. Here you will find Swan Lake Iris Gardens, historical monuments, Shaw AFB, Riley Ball Park, HBCU Morris College, University of SCSumter, and many other scholastic institutions. Sumter County is centralized (2-hr drive) to many major cities like Charleston, Myrtle Beach, Greenville, Rock Hill, Savannah and Augusta. It’s a great place to raise a family. 5
T4RM: I know and have personally seen your passion for helping people into homes. Tell us what caused you to get involved in Real Estate? FRC: Real estate was my pathway to survival. I was underemployed for 4 years after being in sales for nearly 2 decades. It was a means to an end. It instantly opened my eyes to the needs of my community and people. In turn, it made me realize there was an underserved sector in our county. T4RM: I know that you were a Mayoral Candidate in 2020, in Sumter. Tell our readers what prompted you to run for Mayor of Sumter? FRC: What prompted me to run for Mayor of Sumter is my desire to build upon the foundation that was already set in place. I felt my city needed some nurturing to enhance the well-being of small businesses, community awareness, and the retail experience to support the growing industries that surround our city. T4RM: I know that some of your friends/families were there when you were campaigning for Mayor. I know that your mom was there with you and I think your other siblings. Did that give you a sense of how important it is to have family on the trail with you? FRC: It’s one of the most important factors needed when you’re on the campaign trail. Having my mother, son, and siblings gave me the support to continue on the journey. I don’t think I would have continued without it. The critiques made me more aware. T4RM: How would you say that you are transforming the lives of the people of Sumter? FRC: I meet people all the time that don’t understand the power of ownership. It gives you a sense of what the American Dream is about. Helping first time homebuyers through the process of buying a home, the current homeowner wanting to build their dream home or even the entrepreneur wanting to buy its first office location. We work with everyone to get an understanding of what your lives will become after such a milestone is accomplished. T4RM: Do you plan to help develop the transformation for women who want to work but don’t have the skills to work in Corporate Sumter and its surrounding areas? FRC: Yes, I do every day and all the time. Everyone has a natural ability to do something great. Along with a skill set, someone also needs to have confidence and determination to get the job done. I can teach the skill, you just have to have the will. You have to want it! 6
T4RM: When did you realize the call to push for a better Sumter for all? FRC: When I left my corporate job and came back home, I saw the big lights of the larger cities. I came home and the lights were dim; there were not many great paying jobs except for factory work, and the shopping experience didn’t exist. T4RM: What are some of the things in the Sumter County that grab your attention the most for help? FRC: Education is the most important indicator to any thriving community. Without education, we can’t support our industries or replenish the workforce. Knowledge is Power and Communication is Key. We need our people to be educated in health, finances, history, science, math, business and other cultures. Social skills are enhanced by education. The more education you have, the more capable you become. T4RM: Do you see many of the churches getting involved when it comes to the health and wellbeing of Sumter? FRC: I have seen churches come together during the Covid-19 pandemic to provide food and supplies for the community. T4RM: Was there a specific incident or circumstance that was pivotal in you knowing or deciding with determination that there has to be new development and movement in Sumter? FRC: Nothing specific, just my overall experience and understanding that, there is more to offer than what we currently have. T4RM: As you continue to position yourself in the lives of many in Sumter, what would be the “thing” that you want to impart to the people of Sumter the most? FRC: Nothing ever happens without intent. T4RM: I know that when I volunteer to distribute toys or clothes, it is a very rewarding feeling. When you work with the Seniors, how does that make you feel? FRC: Seniors are the most forgotten group of people in the world in my opinion. They are our knowledge base and contain the most accurate history that we could build on. It’s great working with them and it feels like I’m helping my own grandparents. I enjoyed getting calls from them and hearing great stories. T4RM: Tell our readers about some of the people you’ve met while campaigning for Mayor of Sumter? FRC: Campaigning for Mayor of Sumter, I met the served and the underserved. I met with the decision makers of Sumter, I met people from Sumter that hold major political offices in D.C and the state.
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I met my community as a whole. I learned what struggles they are facing and an understanding of what makes them to continue on. T4RM: Foxy, you are actually in your last interview for Transformational 4Real Magazine for 2021. This is a very heavy-duty question, but I believe you are equipped to handle it. Tell us what transformation you would like to see take place in the church, in the city, County, State of South Carolina, USA, and the world. FRC: I would like to see cooperation among all parties and have education as the forefront of every political aspiration. I feel the USA should explore the languages of the world and give exposure to our children grades K-12. Our education system should be focused on a world scale instead of a local scale. We are in the 21st century and our education should represent it. As for the church, it has its own focus that is why we have a separation of church and state. Foxy: It was my pleasure interviewing you. I am excited about where God is taking you and I wish you God’s richest blessings as you move forward doing the things that God has called and ordained for you to do and be.
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Parenting Simplified It’s a big World out there and it’s getting frightening. When our children were young, we were always there for them; years ago, Mothers’ place was to be home caring for their children, not so now, both party work to help in cushioning the crisis. Whenever we had to leave the home, we made sure that we left them in the care of a trusted adult relative, even a neighbor. But as they get older, notice we will be holding their hand less. You’re bound Doris Anetha Shelto McLennon to worry a bit more about their safety, especially in all that is happening in today’s World. We worry when they begin on their own to navigate the sidewalks and roads, or even when they make use of the public transportation, that in itself can be positively nerve wrecking. Every parent’s nightmare is when their child or children is not at home and their phone rings. I can relate, because I have received such a call when my son met his demise in a terrible road accident. I advise that we maintain a close relationship with our children, let us have frequent devotion together, giving GOD all the praise and worship that is due unto HIS matchless name. Have family dinner and lunch as often as we can; a beautiful family movie together in front of the television is a plus. Have a one-on-one time with your child/children to see what bubbles up. Anytime you notice that your child seems distant, make it your highest priority to reconnect. Have discussion on Road Safety, teach them how to cross the road. We are seeing a very disturbing trend now where our children can be seen looking at their phones while crossing the street. Once your child is old enough to use a mobile phone, he or she must have the discipline to know when to put their phone away. Most frightening too for us parents is the statistics on child molestation. Just the facts that one out of every three girls will have suffered some unwanted sexual touching by the time she is sixteen, don’t assume that it’s only girls who go through this. The statistics for boys are almost as bad—one out of six boys. In most cases, someone the parent or child knows and trusts usually perpetrates child molestation.
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So teaching our children “Stranger Danger” completely misses the point and that alone does not protect them. Instead teach consent. If you want your child to stand up for him or herself in an abusive situation, it’s critical that they be allowed to make their own decision about who touches her or him from an early stage. Don’t allow anyone to steal kisses or hugs if your child says no. Who knows what terrible vibes the child is getting from someone who you think you can trust? Never force your child to be touched, kissed or hugged by a relative or friend if he/she doesn’t want that contact. Let your child be in charge of her own body. Talk with them constantly and listen more than you talk. Listening keeps you connected and helps your child feel safe. But it also helps your child to feel safe talking to you more. Another thing too, introduce topic that will help your child think, reflect, and develop good judgment. Ask questions like “What do you worry about the most? How was school today?” and so on. It is most vital that you pray with them, more now than ever, because we are living in perilous times. Train them up in the way they should go and when they are old, they will not depart from it. At the end of the day, the most overwhelming key to a child’s success is the positive involvement of parents in their psychological, spiritual, cognitive, emotional, and physical development.
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The Purpose For Jesus’ Birth Sharon Weeks-Alleyne
Read Isaiah 9:6
H
e came to earth with a purpose, not just to be born but to die. He came knowing the government will be upon His shoulders, He knew all He would be going through, but He came anyway. He was born to die, not for Himself, but for a world that all past, present, and future will be born into and born sinful. He had all that placed on Him. At times we have one thing that’s bothering us, and we feel so down, we get depressed and think we can’t face another day, we could only imagine how Jesus felt, what a burden! We love His birth, we rejoice at His birth but His coming meant far more to Him than a celebration, it meant salvation of souls, but many times we get caught up with times and seasons and we forget purpose.
Paul had to speak to the church and let them know that God is more interested in us spending time living and worshiping Him in Spirit and truth and seeking souls to be saved, but it seems our interests is in who celebrates Christmas or no, who has Easter right, who worships on which day, when our emphasis should be on living right, doing right, and seeing souls saved. The church I attend has a dynamic worship leader who was saved at a church that was giving sweets out for Halloween, many are saved at Christmas, Easter, on Saturday and Sunday, some places worship on Wednesday, because that’s the day of rest in their country, I don’t see God or Jesus having a problem with it, so why should we. We condemn the religious folks who gave Jesus a hard time for healing and changing a man’s life on the Sabbath but we’re those same religious folks, all we do is condemn and while we’re spending time tearing down each other, the sinful world is going to hell. We need to read THE ENTIRE BOOK OF ROMANS, but ROMANS CHAPTER 14 should be read over and over and over again and whether we choose to celebrate Christmas or not, Easter or not, let’s keep in mind what HIS PURPOSE of being born was for.
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The Extended Family Athena Morrison
During the month of December, Christmas is on everyone’s mind. We are thinking of the birth of Jesus (whether it’s the right time of His birth or not, we seem to agree on this time). The thought of Jesus’ birth leads me to think of the responsibility of parents and grandparents in the lives of their children. Who were Jesus’ parents? We all know the answer to this: Mary, and Joseph. Who were the grandparents of Jesus? This question is not so easily answered but I could not find any scripture that shows that the grandparents of Jesus were directly responsible for His upbringing. Parents are responsible for raising God-fearing children who respect authority. Proverbs Ch. 22:6 says, “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it” (NKJV). I think of my parents and the way I was brought up, the things I was taught about life and whether those things were all biblical. I know although those lessons were not stated in the biblical sense, they were sound lessons. There were times when I thought my parents were heartless and did not love us as children, but those were the times when we needed to be disciplined. I never thought how hard the discipline was on my parents, how difficult it must have been to see hurt or disappointment on the faces of their children. Hebrews Ch. 12:11 says, “Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it” (NKJV). 13
As a parent, I wondered if I have done my best to raise my children with that scripture in mind and realized that I did what I knew, whether it was good or just easy. I simply followed the path my parents laid out for me and at this time when my children are grown, I pray each day and ask God to forgive me for the things that were not of Him and also for forgiveness from my children for anything that may have caused them not to look to God for answers to life’s struggles. Regarding grandparents, the Scripture states that grandparents should love, nurture, and teach their grandchildren. It does not state that grandparents are responsible for “raising” their grandchildren, that is the role of the parents. Today’s grandparents are in the precarious position of having to raise their grandchildren which sometimes leads to various stressful health situations. Psychologists state that grandparents who raise their grandchildren have a higher-than-normal rate of depression, sleeplessness, emotional problems, and chronic health problems such as hypertension, loneliness, isolation, and a sense of having too little privacy. Grandparents face issues such as grief, guilt and anger while raising grandchildren. These problems come from the state of the parents’ involvement in their children’s lives. Are the parents mentally and financially capable of taking care of their children? The thought that children think it is good for grandparents to raise grandchildren is rooted in the belief that it takes a village to raise a child; this does not necessarily mean the village has the responsibility that supersedes the responsibilities of the parent. The responsibility of raising the children comes from the parents, unless the parent/parents are not physically, mentally, or financially responsible and even in those cases, it does not necessarily mean the grandparents should be fully responsible for raising their grandchildren without having a conversation with the parents before making decisions that will impact the grandchildren for a very long time. Many grandparents would gladly take on the responsibility of raising their grandchildren and although this is not an easy task, they will do it for as long as necessary and they would not murmur or complain as long as the grandchildren are happy and healthy in mind, body, and spirit. May God bless these grandparents with the fortitude to endure and in turn may grandparents tap into the Holy Spirit within them and glorify God for the good results.
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Sophia Sparkle Youth Group Monthly Update Doris Anetha Shelto McLennon Supporting the Continuation of Teaching and Learning during the Coronavirus pandemic here is very challenging. The virus is running its course. We here at Sophia Sparkle Youth Group friendly space are implementing measures that will limit our numbers of children who will congregate. Sad that this is happening, because our Group attendance before the pandemic was 198; this measure menas thall all our Group members cannot assemble has been extensive. But we will continue to work on methods that will make our Classroom fit for the members to be in a safe environment. Notice the role of Teachers is rapidly evolving, becoming in many ways more difficult than when learning took place only in person. Here at our Friendly Space, the wearing of facemasks would remain as a precautionary measure for everyone. Our Children are learning to adjust. Every one of our sessions must commence with the usual praise and worship period which aims at giving thanks to the ALMIGHTY for allowing us to meet again. It must be noted that prayers are a very important practice that can help to begin the day with positivity and a focus on GOD. It also holds the power to center us and guide us all into the flow of the day, reminding us of the LORD in both good and bad times. The children are engaged presently in a lot of topics. We are aware that our children will become the citizens to take on overseer (administrative, influencer, leadership) roles over our planet, so we will try to equip them with the skills set that they will need to take on challenges and opportunities that we can’t yet even imagine. The topics that we are most focused during the pandemic are STEM, Art of Public Speaking, and Art and Craft. STEM is an initiative aim to educate our class on the technical aspects of Robotic from a practical and technological perspective. Additionally, participants will be guided to unleash their creative potential in the use of Science, Technology, Engineering and Mathematics. They are being provided with Robotic
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Kits which connects science and math concepts to the real world; our children will see different scientific theories with those Kits. Then they are taught the Art of Public Speaking and its benefits. The importance of developing public speaking amongst our members can improve their communication skills, and also increase their self-esteem. It’s an art that not many can master but training them from a very young age for public speaking can actually leverage their natural fearlessness into the trait of a good, composed and professional personality. Arts and Craft is a topic that most of our children love very much, it is important in our children education. It opens the heart and minds to possibilities and fuels the imagination, and it plays a major role in uncovering and nurturing natural talents. These are main topics that we are engaged with in classroom during this time. The Covid-19 pandemic has disrupted the education sector worldwide and the way we have to teach our children now we weren’t prepared for, but we are doing our best under difficult conditions. We are inventing new ways of teaching; it is very challenging to teach during this time. Over the years, our children have had plenty of practice in class with frequent hand washing, the proper use and wearing of facemasks and how to keep a safe distance from people. Rest assured that those learned behaviors will stay with them. Our full members are praying, and they await that glorious day when they all can assemble together like before. We have so much work to do. Additionally, the preparation for our big Annual Christmas events will continue under our safe Covid-19 guidelines, and we are in dire need of donations to help make that event a success. Toys and items that can go towards the hampers and meals will be so welcome. Foodstuff, clothes, etc. will be most welcome. Though living in this time of uncertainty and fear, everything is going to be fine. I have all the faith in my GOD the CREATOR OF THIS UNIVERSE, and I’m hopeful for a better Tomorrow.
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This is just one gift Apostle Dr. Meta E. James
Today more than ever before, we need to understand that December is a month celebrated with so many gifts and thousands of dollars spent. Our children, grandchildren, family, and friends exchange these gifts. This is an enjoyable time to celebrate with our families. Eating those hams and turkey fried and baked, candied yams, dressings, potato salad, sweet potatoes, green beans, collard greens, salads, mashed potatoes and gravy, cranberry sauce, Cornish hens, fried chicken, ribs. We can’t forget the sweet potato pies, cherry pies, pecan pies, apple pies, pound cakes, of course top it off with our favorite ice cream. Coming together singing carols and going house to house singing to our neighborhood. The joy of making dinners for those less fortunate and giving toys and gifts to make sure our children and seniors have a great day. It is such a blessing that we can come together in unity. I encourage that we stop fussing and arguing other things that we need to pray about and let God take care of it, for He is in control not matter what we go through. We have those that may feel alone, and do not have family, or have a family but still feel isolated. Today I want you to know I am here for you and ask you accept the gift and ask for help. My prayer is that not just this day we celebrate but every day, we remember Jesus is the reason for the season. The greatest gift we can offer to those around us is Jesus Christ. “For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believeth in him, shall not perish but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16) Accept Jesus as your Lord and Savior. Because of Calvary,
Apostle Dr. Meta E. James metajamesministries@gmail.com
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Mental Health Matters Ebony Vaughan, LCSW-C In a world where the hustle and bustle of life is constant, it is so important for us to demonstrate awareness of our psychological and emotional well-being and its impact on our daily lives and relationships. Mental Health includes a person’s emotional, psychological, and social well-being. It affects a person’s cognition, their senses and behavior. Cognition has everything to do with the way that a person thinks, and senses has to do with the feelings of a person. A person’s mental health often influences their behavior and the way that they respond to external stimuli. Mental Health determines how people handle stress, relate to others, and make everyday choices. Mental Health is now one of the most talked about areas but has not always been. In the past, persons experiencing a mental health crisis were looked down upon and it was such a taboo topic. People would feel compelled to often hide their struggles and avoid discussing for fear that they would be labeled “crazy.” The idea of going to a therapist was an absolute no-no and to even recommend this to a person was considered offensive. Many were accustomed through their upbringing, to create lives in which they kept going despite how they felt. People were often conditioned to believe they should suck it up, have faith and believe it is going to get better. People learned the art of suppression and created masks that helped them to survive in their environments, whether on their jobs, in churches, or communities. People developed patterns of thinking and behaving that became a defense against the hurt and pain. In the Church World, people were taught to pray about it and give it to God. In some denominations, to struggle with psychological and/or emotional issues meant that you had a “demon.” These former ways of thinking imprisoned so many and caused people to suffer silently for so long. When suffering silently, people often identified other behaviors that nurture and/or deal with the symptoms associated with the mental health issues but failed to bring healing and wholeness. This is something I have found extremely prevalent in my 27-year career as a mental health professional. I have found that people often find alternative ways to cope with mental health distress both positive and negative. Some of the negative ways in which people cope with untreated symptoms of mental illness range from substance use/abuse, promiscuity, overindulgence and/or risky behaviors in relationships, anger, and/ or violence. All these coping patterns often bring a great deal of trauma and negative experiences that perpetuate the emotional and psychological instability; however when left untreated, these behaviors are
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often the ways in which they can express the internal struggles. They’re also coping behaviors, that are not necessarily negative, but still enable a level of avoidance in dealing with psychological and/or emotional issues, that when left unchecked can lead to more severe issues with self and others. To explain this example, I want to tell you a little about my story. At the age of 21, I was spiraling, depressed and afraid of what I was becoming. I became afraid that the very images that haunted me as a child, due to traumatic experiences I faced as a child, were becoming a reality. I began to experience hopelessness, anger and I found myself doing things that I never thought I would do. I was angry and extremely unhappy. I began to compromise my integrity and values as a young woman. One morning, I woke up and called a girlfriend, who would often ask me to go to church. When she answered the phone, I said, “I’m coming to church with you.” In that moment, I was looking for refuge. I no longer wanted to feel the way I had been feeling. Now to be honest, I am not sure I was looking to “address my depression” and really deal with what haunted me for so long, I just wanted a refuge. This does not seem like a problem, it seems positive, right? I was in the church!! Well, my depression and what I was running from did not disappear because I was in the church, but I engrossed myself into the culture of the church and as a result, I found a hiding place. Now the positive part was that, it was a church where I could learn about God. However, the negative part was that, I fell into rituals and practices that yielded no freedom and only offered a temporary escape instead. It was temporary because the moment I was not busy, the thoughts and internal struggles reappeared. I privately struggled with low self-esteem and was often depressed even though I was praising God, until I learned that I needed to deal with my pain in addition to cultivating my faith in God. This is just one example of many, of what people often do to avoid dealing with the pain of emotional and psychological instability. My joining the church was a positive thing, however it was a way of escape and became a refuge which allowed me to hide while conveying an appearance of freedom. I want you to think about that man or woman, who engrosses themselves in their parental responsibilities, their profession and/or their community involvement. These persons often create the cycle of busyness to escape and/or avoid dealing with the truth of their emotional and psychological instability. Their identities become the images that they create through acquiring positions of prestige, status, material things and/or community/ministry assignments. These acquired identities become positive diversions and distractions, that often enable avoidance and the suppression of mental health issues and unresolved trauma. People learn to master the art of suppression and create masks that help them to navigate their environments with images of freedom and success. These behaviors often cause patterns of thinking and behaving that become a defense and a protective guard against hurt and pain yet perpetuate emotional and psychological instability. What happens when a person gets to spaces in their lives, where they are no longer have the capacity to suck it up? What if they admit that they don’t possess the hope or belief that things will get better? What about when the masks begin to fade, and their emotional containers become too heavy to carry suppressions. These are things I often encounter in my profession as a Licensed Clinician. Often people seek therapy after having experienced an overload which has resulted in a negative impact on themselves and/or in their relationships. We are now in a time, where people are gaining the courage to admit that they are emotionally and psychologically impaired. People are seeking help now more than ever. Society is removing the taboo of mental illness and highlighting its effects on humanity. Now you can find more people writing articles and sharing their stories on talk shows, television shows and creating social media platforms solely for the purpose of shedding light on Mental Health matters. Mental health is nothing new, and in fact has resulted in thousands of suicides, psychiatric hospitalizations, and community behavioral programs rising up all over the world. However, society is now making it more prevalent and acceptable to talk about it. Clinicians all over this country, are reporting an increase in their practices and Churches are now making Positive Mental Health a part of their spiritual teaching. People are now honoring what the Word of God declares in I Thessalonians 5:23 (NIV), “May God himself, the God
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of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.” The Bible declares that people are 3-part beings—mind, body, and spirit. The truth of people being triune beings is being accepted and it is becoming more clearer that people must equally feed each part of their being. There must be a balance in our effort to provide care to our mind, body, and spirit. Wholeness should be the priority of the people. According to the Cambridge Dictionary, wholeness is defined as the “quality of being or feeling complete and not divided or damaged.” God desires for His people to experience wholeness and fulfillment in every aspect of their lives. According to 3 John 1:2 (AMP), “It is the desire of God for you to be whole and complete, lacking nothing. God has promised to help you along the way, therefore seek health for your body, mind (soul) and spirit. Each of these members needs to thrive and flourish for you to be able to execute your purpose and calling in life.” The COVID pandemic has forced people to face without distraction, all the emotional and psychological impairments that they may have long suppressed and/or avoided with their jobs, relationships and/or the busyness of their lives. For almost 18 months, most of the people in the world were quarantined. This mass pulling away has caused so many people to come to the realization that it is no longer safe to hide and/or suppress their emotional and psychological instability. As a clinician, I am ecstatic at where society is as it relates to shedding light on mental health and my prayer is that this will not just be a trend, but it will become a way of life for so many. Let’s get in the habit of participating in activities that will cultivate healthy bodies, minds, and spiritual lives. There are various ways to cultivate healthy bodies such as exercise, annual health check-ups and appropriate follow-up, healthy eating patterns, and proper rest. We cultivate our mental health by feeding it with positive information that yields productivity and fruitfulness. People can cultivate positive mental health by incorporating peaceful practices, releasing offenses and unforgiveness, and being willing to address and resolve painful matters. Positive mental health consists of establishing healthy boundaries in our relationship and roles and responsibilities. Cultivating a positive sense of spirituality has to do with feeding your spirit with the Word of God, prayer and fellowship with like-minded people. Our spirits are fed when we engage in practices that build our faith and bring hope and strength. These practices are not all encompassing but are powerful examples of how people can develop positively as three-part beings. As you read these examples, I employ each of you to engage in practices that are intentional in developing positively your mind, body, and spirit. After reading this article, if you are struggling with your mental health in this season, seek help. There are so many resources now readily available to help you in your journey of wholeness.
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A TEACHABLE MOMENT Do You Know Your Name? Patsy Benjamin
The question of the day is, Do you know who you are and whose you are? According to Dictionary, the term Name means “a word or set of words by which a person, animal, place, or thing is known, addressed, or referred to.” From a biblical definition, it means, “That by which a thing is called; the combination of sounds used to express an idea, or any material substance, quality, or act; an appellation attached to a thing by customary use, by which I may be vocally distinguished from other things. A name may be attached to an individual only, and is then proper or appropriate, as John, Thomas, London, Paris, or it may be attached to a species, genus, or class of things. Known by person, reputation, renown, remembrance, appearance, and authority. In scripture, the name of God signifies his titles, his attributes, his will or purpose, his honor and glory, his word, his grace, his wisdom, power and goodness, his worship or service, or God himself” The names our parents gave us at birth are good, solid, loving names chosen especially for us. Now that we understand our identity in relation to our name, I have a question. Do you really know who you are? Did you know your name should have consequence and importance for every area of your life? Your name should carry weight which implies judgement, your name should mean something to others, your name should stand for a good report, it should be of good influence, and it should be a powerful representation of who we say we are daily. When God changes our name, He does so supernaturally. When God changes our name (from children of darkness to children of Light, for example), He changes our identity, which carries the weight of the Word, therefore causing us to not only act differently but to react differently. We ask many things daily. We pray for family friends, jobs, finances, health, and success. God doesn’t bless us just for ourselves, but He does so because of others. Matthew 7:7-8 states, “7Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find, knock, and it shall be opened unto you. 8For everyone that asketh and receiveth, and he that seeketh, findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened.” Galatians 6:7-9 says, “Be not deceived, God is not mocked; for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap. For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption, but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting. And let us not be weary in well doing; for in due season, we shall reap if we faint not.”
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Do not get upset with why people do not know you or your name, because when God changed you, He changed your name—you became a new creature. Could it be that they do not know your name because they have not met Christ yet? God’s Name transforms us. Being successful changes status but not who we are as a person. Let us just keep it real, we must be a good steward over who God has called us to be, we must be a good steward over the transformation process which allows us to be good stewards over our testimony (not being boastful but mindful of where God brought us from). Furthermore, once we are successful entrepreneurs because of good stewardship, then we can visualize who we really are. We cannot confess that we do not know. You see, transformation brings about change, you cannot show change if you haven’t been into your new. Example, my mom and dad gave me my natural birth name, my supernatural name change came by way of supernatural transformation when I accepted Jesus as my Lord and savior. Transformation comes when we hear God and obey the assignment and call on our life. We are all stewards in the earth realm with the main reason of existence to serve the one and only true living God. How we speak and be of good service to one another says who we are and whose we are. Our character should speak volume. In view of this, bear in mind that, as iron sharpens iron, so our character influences others—our character is a direct representation or reflection of our new name; the New Birth. Name change and transformation is not always easy as it comes with challenges, but the question is, Are we up for the challenge?” This is because we must be prepared to interact both in the secular and in the Kingdom spheres of this life. When we allow God to be in complete control of our transformation (name change), we become sons and daughters in the Kingdom as well as businesspeople, business owners, entrepreneurs, teachers, leaders, writers; the list goes on. God knows our name no matter what. Name change from God outshines any elevation in the world. Are you willing to accept a Kingdom Name Change or will you be stuck in the classification of the world? What more? Your name should carry weight to break generational curses, to pave the way, to be an encourager, a torch bearer, the light on the hill, and the one who replies ‘Lord I’ll go send me.’ We should be the name changers for others who have an identity crisis of not knowing why or when. We should identify as a living example of the name changer (Yahweh) as we live a purpose-driven life. God is calling kingdom builders, faith walkers; those that will take a stand against the enemy and declare and decree the salvation of the Lord, and stand in the gap for others; as well as willing workers, real time prophetic people as His spokespersons, and godly leadership for generations to come. Be that voice crying in the wilderness, declaring, and decreeing transformation to take our children back from a dying world. Don’t just be a body in Christ but be the true real body of Christ in the Kingdom of God, where real-time successes, multiple streams of income and the abundant life are created. We need to know that God knows our name not only here on earth but that it is written in the Book of Life. Hello Kingdom Builders, be the connection, a world changer for the glory of God, be peace makers not peace breakers. Your name should carry weight, make sure your anchor holds and grips a solid rock, that rock is Jesus Christ. Do not be a name dropper, be a name identifier. Stand on what God called you to be in the Kingdom, to create an atmosphere of exchange in a world of chaos and confusion. Make sure your name carries weight; make sure it is an assignment from God, because God is the only one that will be able to help us withstand the weight of the world. Romans 12:2 says, “And be not conformed to this world; but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.” Remember, “IT’S TRANSFORMATIONAL 4REAL.”
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