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January 10, 2014 Art by Joe Chierchio


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DAN’S PAPERS

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M A N H AT TA N

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B R O O K LY N

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QUEENS

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LONG ISLAND

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THE HAMPTONS

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January 10, 2014 Page 3

THE NORTH FORK

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RIVERDALE

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WESTCHESTER/PUTNAM

|

FLORIDA

oPen House BY aPPointMent sagaponack | $5,200,000 Sagaponack Modern, by HARIRI & HARIRI. An Architectural work of art. 6 bedrooms, 2.8 acres. 5,800 sf, Gunite pool, Har-Tru tennis. Art studio/guest house. Includes basic furnishings. Web# H15558. Lori Barbaria 516.702.4569 | lbarbaria@eliman.com

oPen House BY aPPointMent sag Harbor Village | $3,650,000 Waterfront with a dock, heated Gunite pool, 4 bedrooms, 4 baths, and chef’s kitchen. Den/5th bedroom, walk out lower level, 2-car garage. James Merrill design, solid construction, faces south. Web# H061409. Lori Barbaria 516.702.5649 | lbarbaria@elliman.com

oPen House BY aPPointMent sag Harbor | $1,750,000 Mostly cleared 2.4 acres by the bay. Rolling lawn, pool, room for tennis. 3 bedrooms, finished basement, 2-car garage. Private beach community with boating. Web# H15250. Lori Barbaria 516.702.5649 lbarbaria@elliman.com

oPen House sun. 1/11 | 12-2PM 163 chardonnay Drive, east Quogue | $1,195,000 | Spectacular home in the Pines with all the amenities for your convenience. Outside resembles a Tuscany hideaway with all the toys to play or lounge around. Web# H16381. Lucille rakower 516.902.0220

sunset VieWs amagansett | $4,995,000 Nantucket-style home on almost 1-acre. Heated infinity pool, extraordinary outdoor living spaces such as porches and patios, and stunning views all around. Web# H61592. Justin agnello 631.267.7334

Waterfront Magnificence Hampton Bays | $3,325,000 This 6,000 sf waterfront home, state-of-the-art kitchen with butler’s pantry outdoor kitchen, heated in-ground saltwater pool, 2 floating ramps, as well as a dock for a 40 ft boat. Web# H40454. Patrick McLaughlin 917.359.4138

Dunes conteMPorarY amagansett | $2,195,000 Contemporary Saltbox with 2,200 sf, 4 bedrooms, 2 baths, living room with cathedral ceiling and fireplace. Pool surrounded by patio and cabana with outdoor shower. Web# H0144045. Lili elsis 631.433.0099

BucoLic BaYfront sag Harbor | $2,150,000 | Bay with breathtaking views of Shelter Island and Barcelona Point. Magnificent waterfront with path to sandy beach. Beach house has 3 bedrooms, 2 baths, decks overlooking expansive lawn. Web# H14264. Victoria Van Vlaanderen 631.537.5900

aMazing Water VieWs southampton | $1,375,000 | This home offers 5 bedrooms, 3.5 baths, custom kitchen, deck sits atop a cupola, and water as far as the eye can see. Green features keep maintenance costs low. Web# H35293. ann Pallister 631.723.2721

BriDgeHaMPton cHarM Bridgehampton | $1,295,000 This lovely, renovated Cottage offers 3 bedrooms and 2 baths with modern conveniences. Spacious backyard with Gunite pool and guest cottage. Just a short drive to the beach. Web# H24006. Paula Hathaway 631.204.2712

stuDio on Dune roaD Westhampton Beach | $199,999 Enjoy the ocean and oceanfront pool from this co-op in La Coquille. The unit has a deck with bayviews and is a short distance to the village. A great price on the ocean. Web# H22093. steven rosmarin 631.255.2213

Picture Perfect Water VieW Hampton Bays | $899,000 | Old world style, but completely updated in 1997. Relax by the fireplace, enjoy your heated inground pool, take a dip at your private beach, or sail your boat, which can be moored with a permit. Web# H23158. constance Porto 631.723.2721

ViLLage neW construction sag Harbor | $849,000 | “Energy Star” Traditional completed 2012 with 4/5 bedrooms, 2.5 baths, 9 ft ceilings and hardwood floors. A wraparound porch with mahogany decking is rich in style and taste. Web# H48800. andrea Mammano 631.680.4461

soutHaMPton sHores southampton | $825,000 | This Cape home, owned by the original developer, offers 3 bedrooms, 2 baths with community tennis and beach, and the opportunity to expand. Web# H25808. David Donohue 631.204.2715

Montauk BeacH cottage Montauk | $795,000 | Beach house with 2 bedrooms, 1.5 baths, vaulted ceilings, central air, fireplace, well thought-out kitchen, room for expansion, full basement and deck all surrounded by preserve. Web# H11940. Bridget Brosseau 631.267.7667

Mint PostMoDern Hampton Bays | $649,000 Updated Postmodern in the desirable Tiana Shores community. All new kitchen and baths. Full, finished basement. Heated Gunite pool. Web# H17352. anne Marie francavilla 631.723.2721 constance Porto 631.723.2721

caLifornia uPDateD rancH Hampton Bays | $597,500 Tiana Shores with water views and salt water pool, living room, fireplace, dining, kitchen, updated appliances screened-in sunroom, and outdoor shower. Web# H19548. codi garcete 516.381.1031

BeautifuL traDitionaL east Moriches | $549,900 Spectacular sunsets, water views and adjacent protected farmland of Tuthill Cove provide a tranquil setting with spacious deck, built-in BBQ, pool and putting green. Web# H21040. georgette Michon 516.316.3482

turn-keY afforDaBLe east Hampton | $499,000 | This new to the market 3-bedroom, 2-bath Saltbox is not only warm and welcoming, but move-in ready. Half acre is landscaped with plenty of room for a pool. Web# H0158663. ronnie Manning 631.267.7367 Yvonne Velasquez 631.329.9400

cHarMing turn-keY cottage sag Harbor | $465,000 | Cape features 2 bedrooms, a new full bathroom, formal living room, enclosed porch, sunroom, outside shower, stone patio, central air, new washer/dryer, plus outdoor lighting and town water. Web# H52678. cynthia Beck 631.537.6076

FOR GUIDANCE AND INSIGHT ON ALL THINGS REAL ESTATE, PUT THE POWER OF ELLIMAN TO WORK FOR YOU. ASKELLIMAN.COM

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© 2013 Douglas Elliman Real Estate. All material presented herein is intended for information purposes only. While, this information is believed to be correct, it is represented subject to errors, omissions, changes or withdrawal without notice. All property information, including, but not limited to square footage, room count, number of bedrooms and the school district in property listings are deemed reliable, but should be verified by your own attorney, architect or zoning expert. Equal Housing Opportunity.


DAN’S PAPERS

Page 4 January 10, 2014

START HERE

If you don’t start here, then you’re not really

1.

page 13

4.

6.

14 Things to do on

the east end in 2014 #4 Climb the Montauk Lighthouse #6 Harvest Your Own Sea Salt #8 Visit every farmers market

1. UPS 2. FedEx 3. Messenger 4. Drone 5. Santa Claus

CAMPING

page 15

Things the lions ate

A. Cross- country ski B. Lace up the skates C. Drive that sleigh D. Take a 4- Wheel Drive

7.

The Hamptons Town Council met last week to discuss new ways of raising money. They are always considering new ways, but this idea was special. Why not, since we are starting a new year, start completely fresh in the Hamptons by declaring all the property ownership deeds null and void and putting all the plots up for auction? Everybody would have to buy their own properties, or other properties, again. There is lots of money around, and the Hamptons is so desirable. Surely, bidding wars would break out. There was unanimous support for this proposal. The nulling and voiding is proposed for February 1. The auction, March 1. The Council will hold a public hearing on Wednesday at 4 p.m. and then hold a final vote the week after. -- DR 5.

How to get around the Hamptons this winter

page 22

Do Over

A. Prepare to Meet Thy Doom B. Prepare to Meet Thy Doom II C. Prepare to Meet Thy Doom III

3.

starting where you’re supposed to start.

page 19

Delivery services 2.

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Representing at Nancy atlas’s Fireside sessions 1. Red Hot Chili Peppers 2. Beatles 3. Rolling Stones 4. Led Zeppelin

Find out at DansPapers.com 8.

Holidays to

Celebrate this week

Whales washed up on Hamptons beaches

Jan. 15: National Hat Day

9.

page 17

A. Twice in One Week B. Both True’s Beaked Whales C. Video at DansPapers.com

page 25

1. Deer 2. Chipmunks 3. A Buick 4. Flowers 5. A Lion Handler

Number of the week: 20

Jan. 10: Peculiar People Day Jan. 12: Feast of Fabulous Wild Men Day Jan. 13: International Skeptics Day Jan. 14: Dress Up Your Pet Day Find reasons to celebrate every day at Events.DansPapers.com

Record for most screen actors guild award nominations, just set by east ender alec baldwin page 18


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DAN’S PAPERS

Page 6 January 10, 2014

danspapers.com

VOLUME LIV NUMBER 41

This issue is dedicated to Alec Baldwin (again).

Chief Executive Officer Bob Edelman, bedelman@danspapers.com

Jan u a ry 1 0 , 2 0 1 4

President and Editor-in-Chief Dan Rattiner, dan@danspapers.com Editorial Director Print & Digital Eric Feil, ericf@danspapers.com Senior Editor Stacy Dermont, stacy@danspapers.com Web Editors Brendan J. O’Reilly, brendan@danspapers.com Oliver Peterson, oliver@danspapers.com Sections Editor Kelly Laffey, kelly@danspapers.com

13 Drone Wars

15 End of the World

17 Two Lions

by Dan Rattiner An attempt to pick up and replace a Christmas gift in Bridgehampton

by Dan Rattiner The end of a man who repeatedly predicted the end of the world

by Dan Rattiner Lions eat deer, return to South Africa, but two remain

Assistant Editor Lee Meyer, lmeyer@danspapers.com Director of Technology Dennis Rodriguez, dennis@danspapers.com

Publisher Steven McKenna, smckenna@danspapers.com Associate Publishers Catherine Ellams, Kathy Rae, Tom W. Ratcliffe III

N orth Fork

9 South O’ the Highway

classic cars

All the latest Hamptons celebrity news

22 Driving in the Snow by Bob Gelber

10 Hamptons Subway

keep fit

27 North Fork Calendar

Thursday!

A rt s & enterta i n m ent

22 It’s Throwback

by Dan Rattiner

11 PAGE 27

by Kelly Laffey

Your route to where the beautiful people play

doctor gadget

23 Confessions of a Technology Addict

12 Police Blotter

by Matthew Apfel

All the news that’s not fit to print on the East End. Featuring Shelter Island

sheltered islander

19 Top 14 “East Endy” Things on My 2014 To-Do List by Stacy Dermont

23 Hitting the Big Time for the New Year by Sally Flynn

25 News Briefs —Project MOST to Receive $30,000 from the Hampton Marathon —Two True’s Beaked Whales Was Up in the Hamptons —East End Towns Outline Provisions for Christmas Tree Disposal —Long Island Aquarium Offers Half-Off Admission —Schneiderman Named Suffolk Legislature’s Deputy Presiding Officer

20 Fireside Sessions with Nancy Atlas by Ellen Dioguardi HONORING THE ARTIST

21 Joe Chierchio

by Stephanie de Troy

14

page 27

Peconic Ballet Theatre steps it up in Riverhead

page 28

A new play debuts at Bay Street Theatre this summer

31 Art Calendar

l if es tyle page 32

Shop ’til you drop!

H o us e & H o me page 33

Why snow is good for your garden

Account Managers Denise Bornschein, Jean Lynch, John Ovanessian Senior Inside Account Manager Richard Scalera Inside Account Managers Kathy Camarata, Steve Daniel Art Director Tina Guiomar, artdir@danspapers.com Production Manager Genevieve Horsburgh, gen@danspapers.com Graphic Design Flora Cannon, flora@danspapers.com Photo Coordinator Nicholas Chowske, nick@danspapers.com Business Manager Margo Abrams, mabrams@danspapers.com Marketing Manager Ellen Dioguardi, ellen@danspapers.com Advertising Sales Support Lisa Barone, lisa@danspapers.com Accounting Assistant Lisa Kelleher Distribution Coordinator Dave Caldwell, delivery@danspapers.com Contributing Writers Matthew Apfel, Joan Baum, Llewellyn Chapman, Janet Cohren, Stephanie de Troy, Sally Flynn, Steve Haweeli, Anthony Holbrook, Kelly Krieger, Silvia Lehrer, Tamara Matthews-Stephenson, Jeanelle Myers, Robert Ottone, Susan Saiter-Sullivan, Debbie Slevin, Kendra Sommers, Marion Wolberg-Weiss

34 Calendar 36 Kids’ Calendar

Food & Di ni ng page 40

26 Dan’s Goes To...

Sister duo opens new restaurant in Southold

42 Service Directory

R eal e s tate

49 Classifieds

New column: Real Estate Roundtable

page 51

158 County Road 39 • Southampton, NY 11968 • 631-537-0500 • Classified Phone 631-537-4900 • Classified Fax 631-287-0428 Dan’s Papers was founded in 1960 by Dan Rattiner and is the first free resort newspaper in America.

Contributing Artists & Photographers Kimberly Goff, Daniel Gonzalez, Barry Gordin, Megan Lane, Richard Lewin, Stephanie Lewin, Michael Paraskevas, Nancy Pollera, Tom W. Ratcliffe III

Dan’s Advisory Board Ken Auletta, Barbaralee Diamonstein-Spielvogel, Avery Corman, Frazer Dougherty, Audrey Flack, Walter Isaacson Billy Joel, John Roland, Mort Zuckerman

Manhattan Media Chairman of the Board: Richard Burns rburns@manhattanmedia.com CEO: Joanne Harras jharras@manhattanmedia.com Dan’s Papers LLC., is a division of Manhattan Media, publishers of AVENUE magazine, New York Family and producers of The New York Baby Show. © 2013 Manhattan Media, LLC 72 Madison Ave, 11th Floor, New York, NY 10016 t: 212.268.8600 f: 212.268.0577 manhattanmedia.com Dan’s Papers • 158 County Road 39, Southampton, NY 11968 631.537.0500 • Open Monday - Friday 8:30am - 5:00pm


DAN’S PAPERS

January 10, 2014 Page 7

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DAN’S PAPERS

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Nancy Atlas’s first Fireside Session at Bay Street Theatre in Sag Harbor last Friday sold out and was a smash hit! Drummer Chad Smith from the Red Hot Chili Peppers was her redhot guest. See photos on “Page 27,” which is on page 11 this week. This Friday, Jan. 10, Atlas will be joined onstage by Andy Aledort, guitarist extraordinaire and Dickey Betts sideman. If you’re luck enough to get tickets, you’ll also see Dan’s Papers own Dan Koontz on organ, with his signature Leslie speaker. Read more on page 20.

Bigstock.com

Hamptonite Billy Joel played Brooklyn’s Barclays Center on New Year’s Eve. With more than 18,000 attendees, it was the arena’s biggest show yet. A portion of the concert was also televised during Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve. Joel’s monthly residency at Billy Joel New York’s Madison Square Garden begins Jan. 27. Joel just made his second large donation in the form of a piano to Stony Brook University. Through his Joel Foundation, which provides music scholarships, gifts and endowments to institutions up and down the East Coast, he gave the university’s music department a premier concert piano—a $250,000 Bosendorfer Imperial grand piano. Stony Brook says it is considered the RollsRoyce of pianos. East Hampton’s Sean “Diddy” Combs and Ciroc recently raised $1.5 million for the vodka company’s anti-drinking-and-driving campaign. Combs is expanding his reach in the liquor market. And Combs, whose Ciroc Vodka is a $100 million franchise, recently partnered with DeLeon Tequila. The high-end alcohol sells for $140 to $825 a bottle. South Forkers Christie Brinkley and daughter Sailor rang in New Year’s at Sag Harbor resident Donna Karan’s celebrity-packed bash in Turks and Caicos’ Parrot Cay. Brinkley posted pictures of the pair having fun with Jimmy Fallon on Instagram. Sailor is following in her mother’s footsteps with a new Ralph Lauren modeling gig. Sailor posted a picture of herself posing for the fashion designer’s Denim & Supply line on Twitter last week. Water Mill’s Jennifer Lopez returned to her roots, and the Bronx, to (Continued on page 18)

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DAN’S PAPERS

Page 10 January 10, 2014

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UI O G HA UE M PT O N BA SH YS IN NE CO CK SO UT HA M PT W O AT N ER M IL L SA G HA RB O BR R ID G EH AM EA PT ST O HA N M PT O M N AI N BE AC AM H AG AN SE TT BE AC H HA NA M PT PE O AG N UE LO BT ST ER RO M LL O NT AU K B DI EA TC CH H PL AI N CA S M P HE RO M O NT AU K PO IN T

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“Along with the New York Subway System, Hamptons Subway is the only underground transit system in the State of New York.”

The H amptons Subway Newsletter By DAn rattiner

Week of January 10–16, 2014 Riders this past week: 6,322 Rider miles this past week: 91,712 DOWN IN THE TUBE Demi Moore was seen on the subway going from Quogue to Southampton on Tuesday. Michael Bloomberg was seen carrying cardboard boxes on the subway between downtown Southampton and Shinnecock on Friday. Jon Bon Jovi came down the escalator to the Bridgehampton platform on Monday but then looked at his watch and went back the up escalator. SNOW VOLUNTEERS Few people are aware of this, but Hampton Subway has an active volunteer organization that removes snow anytime it falls into our subways. Founded in 2008 after a severe storm plugged many of the subway entrances with snow, making them impassable, the men and women of HSSV live throughout our community and spring into action at the first snowflake, alerted by specially modified marine radios

tuned to Channel 81 at their homes and businesses. The alarm sounds—a series of whooping noises—and the volunteers leap up wherever they are to gather their snow shovels and brooms and then race to their pre-assigned subway stations to get the job done. It is because of these volunteers that all subway stairs, platforms and tunnels are kept snow-free and we salute them. WEDNESDAY Last Wednesday, on a subway car between East Hampton and Wainscott, the unthinkable happened. According to witnesses, a man in a business suit got up and demanded watches, wallets and jewelry from everyone in his subway car. Everyone complied. When the train stopped in Wainscott, the man ran from the train, but according to more witnesses, another man in a business suit yelled “stop,” and jumped off the train after him and tackled him on the platform. They struggled, the first man got away, ran back to the train to get back on at the last minute, but when the sliding doors closed just before he got there, he leaped up the side and onto the roof, to be followed up by the second man. Witnesses

say the two men fought further up there, a gun was involved, but then the train headed out and into the tunnel toward Sagaponack. Subway police were alerted and immediately called the motorman and the token clerk, told them what happened, and instructed the motorman to not stop in Sagaponack, inform the passengers over the PA, and then just keep on going until hearing further word. Further down, only occasional grunts or shouts came from up top, and the train raced through Sagaponack and Bridgehampton, until finally, in the tunnel between Bridgehampton and Water Mill, after several thumps were heard as if the men had hit the overhead lights, there was nothing. The motorman stopped at Southampton, but when he did, the two men leaped down all disheveled and bloody, raced across the platform, jumped the turnstiles and ran up the down escalators to the street and disappeared. Police are investigating. BIRTHDAY Happy birthday to Subway bookkeeper John Mabel. All employees are welcome to attend the party in the company cafeteria at noon Friday. COMMISSIONER ASPINALL’S MESSAGE If you know the identity of the two men involved in the big fight on the subway last Wednesday, please call me direct. One is a hero, the other a villain, and we need to sort this out. Nothing like this has ever happened before on the subway system and will never happen again. All wallets, jewelry and watches have been gathered up from the tracks and can be picked up at our offices on Ponquogue Avenue in Hampton Bays.

Dan’s Papers Total Monthly Audience

There is no legitimate comparison on the East End to Dan’s Papers Print & Digital Media Reach! DigiTal rEach PriNT rEach 31,764 Audited Weekly Average SuPPleMenTS 14K Monthly Average

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Dan's Hamptons Insider: Hot New Concert Series, Cool Outdoor Adventure...

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January 2, 2014

WHAT TO DO SEE NANCY ATLAS ROCK! The hottest musical event of the winter starts this weekend, as East End musician and perennial Dan's Papers Best of the Best honoree Nancy Atlas is set to perform with her band, The Nancy Atlas Project, at Sag Harbor's Bay Street Theatre, Friday nights through February! This exciting series, called Fireside Sessions, will feature a different guest musician each week, beginning with Chad Smith of the Red Hot Chili Peppers on January 3. Dan's Papers caught up with Atlas to talk about the series, her guests and her connection to Sag Harbor. Read More

WHERE TO GO INTO THE DARK Is darkness becoming extinct? When filmmaker Ian Cheney moves from rural Maine to New York City and discovers streets awash in light and skies devoid of stars, he embarks on journey to America's brightest and darkest corners (including Montauk), asking astronomers, cancer researchers and ecologists what is lost in the glare of bright lights. Find out what he discovers as the Shelter Island Public Library and the Hamptons Take 2 Documentary Film Festival present Cheney's humorous, poetic film, The City Dark. Read More

SOUTH O'ʹ THE HIGHWAY Taking a look back at Alec Baldwin's big year. Recapping where Madonna, Katie Couric and other A-List Hamptonites rang in 2014. Reliving Matt Lauer's Baywatch moment, bathing suit and all. Montauk's Rufus Wainwright paying musical tribute to Sag Harbor's Billy Joel. Michael Bloomberg planning for life outside the mayor's office. All this and more celebrity news from the East End. Read More

DAN'ʹS STORIES PREDICTIONS 2014

Dan’s Papers

DansPapers.com

Email Newsletter

Facebook

From Obamacare to East End windmills, Edward Snowden to Kim Jong-Un, Major League Baseball to the U.S. economy, Madonna to Matt Lauer, here's what's in store for the Hamptons...and the world...in the year to come. Don't say you weren't warned. Read More

WHERE TO STAY HISTORIC SOUTHAMPTON Southampton Inn transforms into the literary center of the South Fork as host of the Southampton Salon Series in honor of the Dan's Literary Prize, but as the new year settles in on the East End, Southampton Inn

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1/7/14 4:26 PM

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PAGE 27

January 10, 2014 Page 11

Renowned Poet Simon Perchik Turns 90 East Hampton poet Simon Perchik celebrated his 90th birthday with family and friends at Poets House in New York. The weather could not could keep his admirers from coming out to honor him. Photographs by Barry Gordin

Reynold Ruffins Retrospective The John Jermain Library in Sag Harbor is hosting a retrospective of artist Reynold Ruffins work through January 18. Photograph by Daniel Gonzalez

Artist Reynold Ruffins with painter Eric Fischl

Artist Faith Ringgold

Dorian Bergen (ACA Galleries) and poet Simon Perchik Sima Ariam and Vered (Vered Gallery, East Hampton)

Fireside Sessions with Nancy Atlas at Bay Street

The 2014 Polar Bear Plunge Benefit

The first live concert in the series featured Red Hot Chili Peppers drummer Chad Smith. Photographs by David Gribin and Daniel Gonzalez

The 2014 Polar Bear Plunge sponsored by YMCA East Hampton RECenter and East Hampton Ocean Rescue Squad benefiting East Hampton food pantries was held on New Year’s Day at Main Beach in East Hampton. Mayor Paul Rickenbach was on hand to kick off the run into the frigid waters and he even got his feet wet. Photographs by Barry Gordin

Johnny “Blood” Leitch, Nancy Atlas, Chad Smith, Brett King, Richard Rosch and Neil Surreal

1. 1. East Hampton Mayor Paul Rickenbach 2. Santa Claus Pat Sullivan, winner of the costume contest 3. Plungers

Johnny “Blood” Leitch jamming with Jim Caponella

Chad Smith was the first special guest to join Nancy Atlas

2.

3.

Don’t miss a beat! Do your cardiac rehab right here. With doctor-monitored cardiac and pulmonary rehabilitation, pulmonary function testing, stress testing and a variety of fitness programs right here at Southampton Hospital, why go anywhere else? Call 631.726.8620 to schedule an appointment.

Committed to excellence, to community, and to you. www.southamptonhospital.org An Affiliate of Stony Brook Medicine | Member East End Health Alliance 31452


DAN’S PAPERS

Page 12 January 10, 2014

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Epidemic Of Sober Drivers A police checkpoint set up along the highway this past week stopped in excess of 200 drivers making their way east. Among these 200 drivers, fully 196 were found to be “unimpaired” by alcohol or drugs. Given that the checkpoint was operating between the hours of 11 p.m. and 4 a.m., local officials have become alarmed by what would appear to be a local outbreak of safe, sober driving at just the time of night when they would expect large numbers of drunken motorists. While some worry that this sobriety may be a trend, others point out that “it’s the off-season,” and that we can expect a robust return of impaired driving come spring. Meanwhile, jail cells will likely be operating below capacity for the foreseeable future. Conspiracy Of Deer East End police forces broke up what they describe as a “full-blown anti-human conspiracy” that was allegedly being hatched among the burgeoning deer population of the area. In a wide-ranging investigation that involved dressing several pairs of lawenforcement officers up as white-tailed deer in order to infiltrate clandestine meetings, police say they uncovered a plot that was to have involved a massive number of deer performing kamikaze missions against civilian motorists. Apparently, many test-runs of this procedure had already been enacted. While police can’t be sure what the deer hoped to accomplish with these attacks, they assure the public that they have issued cease and desist orders to the deer and that motorists should alert them if any deer violate the terms of these agreements. McGumbus’S New Year’s Rockin’ Eve Old Man McGumbus, 103, WWII veteran and self-described “party animal,” had Shelter Island jumping on New Year’s Eve. McGumbus, popularly known as “the world’s oldest old guy,” had secretly been planning festivities for months. At 4 p.m. on December 31, he wheeled his trusty old Victrola to the center of town and began “spinning the oldies and cuttin’ a rug”— which for him apparently meant repeatedly playing “Skip To My Lou” while forcibly twerking with unsuspecting females who happened to pass by. Nightfall found McGumbus launching improvised fireworks made from his secret cache of unexploded ordnance, rockets that seemed rigged to detonate on contact with the ground. Police are continuing to investigate and account for any damage to property. Finally, at 10 p.m., McGumbus yelled “Let’s just drop the damn ball.” He thereupon hoisted a glittering ball, fashioned from a colorful assortment of empty beer bottles held together with string and caulk, up the village flagpole and let it drop freely to the ground. With that, he declared it officially “2014, and I ain’t dead yet!” Read more Hamptons Police Blotter and get exclusive Old Man McGumbus updates at DansPapers.com.


DAN’S PAPERS

danspapers.com

January 10, 2014 Page 13

Drone Wars An Attempt to Pick Up and Replace a Christmas Gift in Bridgehampton

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EWS ITEM: Amazon has demonstrated an airborne drone that delivers purchases to your door. NEWS ITEM: Google now has opened a division studying new developments in drones and robotics. January 3. 9:30 a.m. “Hello, this is Amazon’s help line. I am a computer that can understand complete sentences. May I have your name? Mine is Felicia.” “My name is Alice.” “How may I help you?” “I ordered a sweatshirt for my husband for Christmas but it’s the wrong size. The delivery was fine. The drone came and set it on our front doorstep. It needs to be a large. The sweatshirt is a small.” “I apologize for our error. Do you have the order number?” “Yes. J427996B.” “Thank you. We’ll take care of this right away.” “Do you need any other information from me? Our address or anything?” “No.”

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“We’re at 423 Maple Lane, Bridgehampton, New York.” “I already have all the information from the order number, thank you. Name. Address. Credit cards. Medical history. Just leave the box with the small sweatshirt in it out front of your house on the doorstep. It will be picked up within the hour. And the drone will leave the proper one. And again, I apologize for your inconvenience.” “There’s no hurry. It’s after Christmas now.” “Once again, we apologize. Is there anything else I can help you with today?” January 3. 11 a.m. “Hello, this is Amazon’s help line. I am a computer that can understand complete sentences. May I have your name? Mine is Felicia.” “My name is Alice.” “How may I help you?” “This is in reference to your order number J427996B.” “Thank you. I have all the information in front of me. Do you have the right size sweatshirt now?” “We heard the drone land on our front doormat around 10:30 and we went out just moments after he left, but (Cont’d on next page)

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Page 14 January 10, 2014

DAN’S PAPERS

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Drone (Continued from previous page) there was no package in sight. It did take the box with the wrong size. But then, coming back in, we saw that the fire in our fireplace had flared up. It was a much bigger fire. We got the extinguisher, put the fire out, and we found the problem. Apparently, your drone dropped the replacement package down our chimney.” “I apologize for that. But you got the merchandise? It was all right?” “It’s mostly burned. We need a new one.” “I apologize for that. Are you saying the merchandise was defective?” “No.” “Then what are you saying? I am a computer that can understand complete sentences.” “It was good merchandise, but then it was burned up and became defective while being delivered.” “So this was a ‘damage during delivery’ case.” “Yes.” “Take down this new number: K420223K.” “I have it.” “Leave the damaged goods in the box it came in on your front doormat and we will deliver a replacement for your damaged goods by 1 p.m.” “The box is all burned up.” “What? I am a computer that can understand complete sentences.” “Never mind. I will leave it on the front doormat.” “Once again, we apologize. Is there anything else I can help you with today?” January 3. 1 p.m. “Hello, this is Amazon’s help line. I am a

computer that can understand complete sentences. May I have your name? Mine is Felicia.” “Felicia, we have a big problem here.” “May I have your name? Mine is Felicia.” “This is in reference to K420223K.” “May I have your name? Mine is Felicia.” “Alice. Felicia, listen. We heard the drone come. We went out front. The new package was there. But then another drone came, and when we tried to pick it up, it fired a laser at us. It hit our landscaping, a bush, and set it on fire. We ran back in and slammed the door.” “Could you please speak more clearly? I am a computer who understands complete sentences.” “Felicia. It set a bush on fire.” “If you have a fire, you should put it out.” “We did. We got an extinguisher and ran back out and put it out. Then we ran back in and called you.” “I apologize for this inconvenience. So you have the package?” “No. It’s still out there.” “Is there a reason you are calling me? I am a computer that can answer complete sentences.” “Wait.” (Silence). “The package is gone.” “You say the package is gone?” “Yes. It was there before. It’s been stolen.” “This is a ‘merchandise stolen’ case. I apologize for that. Please take this new order number: X41252K. Another package will be out on your doormat in front of your

house by 3 p.m.” “Do you want to know about the other drone? It was blue. Yours are yellow.” “Once again I apologize. Is there anything else I can help you with today?” January 3. 3 p.m. “Hello, this is Amazon’s help line. I am a computer that can understand complete sentences. May I have your name? Mine is Felicia.” “Alice. X41252K. It’s three o’clock. We can’t go out front.” “I apologize for that. My records show that your replacement product X41252K was delivered.” “It’s out there. We can see it out the window. But there’s a shooting war going on out there. There’s yellow and blue drones shooting at one another up in the sky. It’s terrible.” “Blue drones. I apologize for that. There are blue drones from Google in your sector. They are unauthorized. Dial 911.” “I already did that, just before I called you.” “I apologize for this inconvenience. The situation will be taken care of shortly. We are having difficulty…stay in your homes.” (Sounds of explosions over the telephone). “Hello, Felicia? Are you there?” “I am a computer that understands complete…” “Felicia?” “Once again, I apologize. Stay in your homes. The situation will be taken care of shortly. May I have your name? Mine is Felicia.”


DAN’S PAPERS

danspapers.com

January 10, 2014 Page 15

The End of the World The End of a Man Who Repeatedly Predicted the End of the World By Dan Rattiner

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powerful man who predicted the end of the world repeatedly over a 30-year period to no good effect died last month in California at the age of 92. He was Harold Camping, and he got a good-sized obituary in The New York Times because of his astounding failures. Truly, I think, there has never been such a failed announcement on such a big scale ever before. To get out his message that the end of the world would come on May 21, 2011, he spent tens of millions of dollars over three years buying billboard space, issuing the warning to his millions of followers on radio, giving TV interviews and buying newspaper advertising around the world, all urging people to declare for God and save themselves before it was too late. Some say that Harold Camping was a big fake just trying to make money. But he had made his millions in the construction business earlier on. He didn’t need more money. In retirement—he retired from business early—he had become a charismatic interdenominational religious leader with a solid grounding in the Bible and a determination to convert others. And from a careful reading of the Bible, he had figured out back in 2008 that May 21, 2011 would be Judgment Day. He, Harold Camping, was issuing the fair warning. It was three years’ notice. God would, amidst all the fire and brimstone

on Judgment Day as 7 billion people passed on, allow all those good souls who believed in him or those who had repented and converted to a belief in him, even if it was just at the last minute, a safe refuge in the Kingdom of Heaven with all the other good people for ever and ever. Everybody else would suffer all the fires of hell. For these three years, this was his message. As he said, he could get out this message to some nonbelievers, but he could not get it out all over the world to everybody. To make that happen, he asked his followers to contribute as much as they could so he could buy as many commercials and advertisements and billboards as he could. For that reason, people opened their wallets to help him. I have little doubt that even you, dear reader, remembered this time. Certainly I do. Damned to Hell? I have to make this choice? This was a difficult thing to have to decide. I mentioned this was not the first time that Harold Camping forecast the end of the world. Apparently he studied the Bible and the vast numerology contained within it as a lifetime pursuit. He had made mathematical calculations. According to the Times, he had first predicted various doomsdays in the 1970s, but they got little attention. His first prediction that the public really noted was for an end of the world on May 21, 1988. When that didn’t happen, he worked further with

I think that May 21, 2011— particularly closing in on midnight that evening—must really have been tough on Harold Camping. his mathematical calculations and wound up writing a book called 1994?, in which he gave numerous dates in September of 1994 that the world would end. Exactly when that month, however, he was not sure. Then that date passed. He was, however, sure of his calculations back in 2008 about the new date of May 21, 2011, and indeed many people took him very seriously as the date came closer and closer. Many converted. Many sold everything they owned. A woman in Palmdale, California stabbed her two daughters, age 14 and 11, and then slit her own throat with a box cutter. Mercifully, all three survived. In the Far East, when a huge earthquake and tsunami hit the region, a man in Taiwan, thinking this was the beginning of the end, jumped out a window to his death. Another man died trying to swim across a lake in Antioch, California to reach God. I think that May 21, 2011—particularly closing in on midnight that evening—must really have been tough on Harold Camping. After midnight, crowds went out and (Continued on next page)


Page 16 January 10, 2014

DAN’S PAPERS

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World (Continued from previous page) But then October 21 came and went. And at that point, he knew he was really, really wrong. Should he have made predictions in the first place? trashed his radio studio in Oakland. In the days that followed, protesters inundated the FCC, demanding that Camping’s broadcasting license be revoked. They demanded he be arrested for being a false prophet, for misleading the public, for causing a riot. Camping himself went into seclusion. The earth was still under his feet, the sky was still blue above. He thought two things. One

was that since everything was still here, he’d obviously made a mistake. Two was that he owed everybody an apology for his mistake. He would soon make such an apology, but first he wanted to figure out what happened. Camping went back to the Bible to see what signs and signals he had missed. Everything had to be there. It was just something he had once again interpreted incorrectly. What he came up with a few days later was that he had made certain mathematical mistakes. The real date when the universe would be consumed in brimstone flood and fire was five months hence, on October 21. It was just that Judgment Day had been May 21. The decisions about who gets into heaven and who gets into hell were now decided. It was a done

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deal, and so there was no further point in giving grand publicity to the fact that the real end of everything was now October 21. Why bother? The books were closed. And so, quietly, Camping waited. He also quietly apologized for the mistake about the wrong date over the airways. And further, he also said there was no point in reaching out to anyone else about the new date because the book was closed. No matter what anybody did, there was no changing that. After that, he suffered a minor stroke. He was 90 years old and needed, and got, medical attention. What he thought of the fact that he had had a stroke, I do not know, and neither does the Times, apparently. But his mind stayed clear. And, in several brief interviews he allowed, he stood by October 21. But then October 21 came and went. And at that point, he knew he was really, really wrong, and furthermore, he was probably wrong to have made any predictions about it all in the first place. He was sorry he did. He described what he had done as a “sin” for which he would atone. And he said he would never, ever again make any predictions about the End of the World. “I really am beginning to think,” he said, “as I restudied these matters that there’s going to be no big display of any kind. The end is going to come very, very quietly.” But he did have one final thought. And I think, here at the end it must have brightened his day. “My incorrect and sinful statement allowed God to get the attention of a great many people who otherwise would not have paid attention,” he said. He was a believer, and I am sure that today, a month after his passing, he is upstairs in the Kingdom of God looking down at us, thinking that now as the end is quietly approaching for us all, he may have made a difference in how many got accepted into heaven rather than go down to Hell prior to May 21. His good works might have affected millions.


DAN’S PAPERS

January 10, 2014 Page 17

Photo by Tina Guiomar

danspapers.com

Two Lions Remain Lions Eat Deer, Return to South Africa, But Two Not Rounded Up By Dan Rattiner

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ll the deer in the Hamptons, which until now have caused so much trouble running into cars, eating gardens and shrubbery and spreading Lyme disease, are now gone, eaten in a “natural” way by the African lions imported from South Africa to do the deed. But now there seems to be what might be a troublesome glitch in the situation. As everyone knows, the 26 lions, all supposedly males, were flown to East Hampton by cargo plane in mid-December by billionaire Hans Van der Klerk, a resident of South Africa, who then housed them in his 17 -car garage at his oceanfront Bridgehampton estate. There his workers threw raw meat into the garage every day until finally, this past Monday, he let them out two by two into rented limousines which took them to various woods all around the Hamptons. The deer feast, for that is what it was, was supposed to last for 10 days during which time, with all the local residents staying indoors, these ferocious beasts would do their job. After that time, with their stomachs distended and with them lying asleep and snoring by the roadsides, they would be rounded up by handlers and flown back to South Africa The feast did not last 10 days, however. It was all over by Tuesday at noon. And so, with the job done “as Mother Nature might have done it”

in just 28 hours, there was no further problem and the local residents were able to come out very early. As Mr. Van der Klerk said when, at his own expense, he brought them here, the planned hunt by Department of Agriculture sharpshooters scheduled for February, should not be necessary. It was an interference with Mother Nature, an unnecessary taxpayer expense, and with the high-powered rifles they used a dangerous way to kill 3,000 deer. He brought the lions at his own expense. And the job is done. Except that now we have received word from South Africa that when the plane with the lions arrived at the Transvaal International Airport, only 24 lions got off the plane, not 26.

“There is only the remote possible danger from these lions. They are full of deer meat. We don’t even know for sure that they’re here.” “I received word in a phone call directly from Hans Van der Klerk himself,” said Hamptons Mayor James Hamilton at his latest press conference in front of Town Hall this morning. “This is the first time I have talked to him directly. In the past he has had aides speak to me. So I knew it must be important. He did seem concerned.”

“No one should panic,” the mayor continued. “We cannot completely confirm that the two lions that did not arrive in South Africa are still here. It is possible they escaped during the unloading in the Transvaal, or perhaps they slipped open the cargo door over the Atlantic and two accidentally fell into the ocean.” There is some evidence that these two lions are still here, however. According to the mayor, the loading of the lions onto the airplane at East Hampton Airport involved getting the beasts to run down a narrow chute from the limousines that were used to round them up— two by two—go across the tarmac and then up into the cargo plane, hurried along the path by a team of ranch hands from the Deep Hollow Ranch in Montauk waving their hats and shouting “Hi-Yah!” But it was dark. And the next day, Wednesday, long after the cargo plane had left, airport employees noticed two bloody computer chips on the tarmac and brought them into the airport manager’s office. Nobody thought anything of it at the time, but when it was learned that only 24 lions got off the plane, this became a concern. Aides of Van der Klerk went to the airport and examined the chips today, Thursday morning, and indeed they have confirmed that they were identical to those used in the lions that had been brought here. “These are very high tech chips,” said the mayor. “They send out (Continued on page 20)


DAN’S PAPERS

Page 18 January 10, 2014

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danspapers.com

January 10, 2014 Page 19

Top 14 “East Endy” Things on My 2014 To-Do List

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s a longtime year-rounder I sometimes forget what a great place the East End is to visit. Suffolk County promotes our beaches, wineries, historic villages and golf courses to tourists. What we “locals” know is that another perk of life on the East End is the fabulous people, both the regulars and our “fair weather neighbors.” The sights and culture truly offer something for every taste. I’m committed to getting back in the swing—or the “swim” of things in 2014 and here’s how I’ll do it:

Life’s a beach, on the East End

1. Go to the beach—any beach Many East Enders rarely soak up the rays seaside. It’s a classic case of the shoemaker’s children going barefoot. We take it for granted that the coast will always be there and that we’ll get there eventually, but reality hits—all summer we’re super busy with work, and in the winter it’s pretty darned cold. Last year I made it to Havens Beach (I can almost hit it with a stone from my house.) a whopping twice for an evening stroll with my husband. This year I’m going there in the light of day.

3. It takes a village I shall re-read Dorothy Zaykowski’s Sag Harbor, The Story of an American Beauty this year. I live in the village; I remember that it has a fascinating history—but not many of the details. I will grow to appreciate it all the more and be prepped to impress visiting friends and family with…the top 14 reasons Sag Harbor used to be called “the Unhampton.” And I’m going to read Melville’s Moby Dick. Which is to say, I’m going to read all the words that surround his reference to Sag Harbor as “Sin City.”

Big Duck!

7. South of the Highway I’ll explore Wainscott—not the Wainscott we all know along Montauk Highway where the Seafood Shop and Breadzilla are, though that does beckon. I’m headed to the interior to discover Wainscott’s original main street. While there I will accost a passerby and ask him or her to tell me where he or she lives. I need to know if locals actually pronounce it “Wayneskit.”

Wikipedia.org

2. Red or white? Yes, please. This year I’m not just going to visit some local wineries; I plan to invest in local wine—by the case. More and more of my friends are joining the Wölffer Estate Wine Club. That could be the one for me, I’m a fan, but I’ll check out the North Fork, too. Love that North Fork experience.

6. Beyond the beach I’m not just going to go to the beach and picnic. I shall make my own local sea salt from ocean water. Why buy salt? The natives didn’t. Amagansett Sea Salt makes it look so sexy. After sea salt I’m going to start making my own beer and hard cider and vinegars. Hmm, I’ll have to do this late in the year— otherwise I might never leave the house.

Moby got your dinghy?

9. Now Open I’m going to take a studio tour—any studio tour—on the East End. Maybe a highly organized, daylong fundraiser of an event or maybe just one rum- Montauk Point Lighthouse soaked evening with a new artist friend. I crave original, visual stimulation. Is that a Talking Heads song lyric or just the curator inside my head? Maybe I’ll discover the next Eric Fischl. If I do, you can read all about it in Dan’s. 10. Light the lights! I will see every production at Bay Street Theatre this summer. Confession: Last year I missed one. Conclusion: That’s pathetic! I love live theatre and I live right there! Solution: Don’t miss anything at Guild Hall either! 11. Cheers! I meet a lot of famous people out here. Some of them I greatly admire, and I’d love to chat with them at length. This year I’m going to invite some of them to dinner. What have I got to lose? Gael Greene likes my cooking. So what if I don’t live in a mega McMansion— most people don’t. I can decant wine—or seltzer. Nicholas Chowske

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5. Duck! Who doesn’t love the Big Duck in Flanders? No one! This is the very structure that coined “duck” as an architectural term. You can build structures in the shapes of hamburgers or derby hats—but they’re all called “ducks.” And if that isn’t exciting enough to lure you in—they sell cool patches inside that depict the Big Duck, which you can sew onto your jeans jacket. The last time I was there I bought my son a patch—can’t imagine why he didn’t take that jacket to college. Maybe I should mail it to him.

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4. Thank you, Mr. President. I’m going to climb the Montauk Point Lighthouse—on the inside, relax. I’ve done it once before. It was transcendently awesome. George Washington had the lighthouse erected to save ships, but maybe he also knew that it would provide a cardio workout and a breathtaking panoramic view for generations to come.

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8. Down on the farm Hold onto your straw hats, I’m going to visit every farmers market on the East End. It makes sense to shop at your most local market; it’s the right thing to do. I’m going to be bad, really bad, and hit every one at least once. Sure I’ll continue to shop at Sag Harbor’s every Saturday but also Greenport, Shelter Island, Springs and Westhampton Beach at some point. Montauk of a Thursday. East Hampton and Hayground on a special Friday and Southampton come a certain Sunday—it will not be my “day of rest.” I shall gather the best of the best

12. Everything old… I’m going to visit a bunch of East End museums. I went to them all when East End history was new to me—except for the East End Seaport Museum in Greenport, so I’ll start there. I wonder if they have a cool patch for my son’s jeans jacket. 13. Bringing up my rear I shall run—okay, mostly walk—a 5K for charity. There are tons of these races out here, all for great causes. (I will not be participating in any icy plunges until the year that Global Warming does away with the “icy” aspect. Momma didn’t raise no fools.) 14. Self-titled Last but never least, the #14 dosa at the Hampton Chutney Company in Amagansett. I will get one and face plant. Butternut squash, goat cheese and beets! It’s the best dosa no matter which of the chutneys you choose to accompany it. And it’s seasonal—you can’t get it any old time, because the squash has to be just right. 2014, the year of the squash…won’t you join me?


DAN’S PAPERS

Page 20 January 10, 2014

danspapers.com

Fireside Sessions with Nancy Atlas at Bay Street Theatre

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ast End musician and perennial Dan’s Papers Best of the Best honoree Nancy Atlas has turned Sag Harbor into the winter’s hottest live-music venue by launching the inaugural Fireside Sessions, a new concert series in which Atlas and her band, The Nancy Atlas Project, take the stage at Bay Street Theatre almost every Friday night, joined by a new musical guest each time. The series kicked off with Chad Smith of the Red Hot Chili Peppers taking over the drums on January 3, and the sold-out affair had the crowd on its feet and the roof ready to blow. As she prepares for her second Fireside Sessions gig, the January 10 show featuring guitarist Andy Aledort, the ever-on-the-move Atlas takes a break to talk about the series, her guests and her connection to Sag Harbor. What was the inspiration for Fireside Sessions? Beautiful music in a beautiful setting. The winter is a great time to reflect. I have so many talented friends; this is really a chance for us to sit down and make some amazing music without all the chaos of summer. It was also about giving back a bit. $15 is a price anyone can afford, so they get to see a killer band with a special guest in a fabulous theater and have a real night out without breaking the bank. I lived in Sag Harbor for years, so this is a nice way to reconnect.

How will these shows differ from, say, summertime Nancy Atlas events? It will focus on the guest more than my original music. It really is a mix of music they have written or particularly love and a few of my tunes. We are basically going to have fun and let go a bit. Now that you have the first Fireside Sessions show under your belt, can you reflect back a bit on the first night? Well...let me see. How does one reflect on one of their best shows ever without sounding like a pompous git? I will say this—as an artist, there is a very deep satisfaction when you have a vision and that vision becomes reality. Then, in very rare circumstances, the reality surpasses your vision. That is what happened last Friday night. After a blizzard. Chad Smith took the entire audience on a wild, ecstatic, hair-raising rock and roll voyage for almost two hours. We were just

Watch out!

Nancy Atlas in rare form!

along for the ride. He is, beyond a doubt, a total gift to have as a friend, and I adore him sharing his monster abilities with our band. What is it about Sag Harbor that speaks to you? I lived in Sag Harbor for about six years. As much as I love Montauk, I definitely still miss aspects of Sag, especially in the winter. I’m really looking forward to seeing some old friends and having a beer post-show at the Corner Bar with [bartender] Ed Schuster and [owner] Jimmy Smyth. In fact, I’m looking forward to this entire series. I think it will be magical. I feel it in my gut. One thing is for sure—I plan to bring it on. The stars have aligned; now all we need to do is plug in the amps. For tickets to upcoming Fireside Sessions shows, visit baystreet.org, and check out photos from the Chad Smith show at DansPapers.com.

(Continued from page 17)

a location signal so you can find the lions. That’s how we were able to round them all up. And also, each one gives a different signal, like a fingerprint, which can identify which animal they came from. They came from Nero and Rebecca.” The mayor took questions. “Are you saying,” one reporter asked, “that each of these lions gnawed off the chip of the other lion?” “We can’t say that is a definite.” “Weren’t we told earlier that these were all male lions?” another reporter asked. “Yes. But apparently they were not all males, if one of them was named Rebecca.” “The airport is surrounded by an 8-foot-high deer fence,” another reporter said. “Would that mean the lions are still on the airport grounds?” “We hope to find out. Nobody thinks they can leap up eight feet. But they have claws and like any cats, they can climb. At the present time, we are searching the airport grounds, particularly the fences to see if anything is amiss.” “Who is doing the searching?” “In the absence of the airport staff— the airport is closed at the present time because the staff, cowards that they are, all fled when they heard

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Lions

How are you selecting your guest performers? I’m picking from a pool of individuals that I would basically go to see myself. I am a fan of each and every one of them and they are all top shelf. I also want the audience to see something new. Chad happened to be in town, Randi Fishenfeld is in from Florida and Andy Aldort wasn’t on the road with Dicky Betts. The series is meant to be!

Daniel Gonzalez

By ellen dioguardi

“Nobody thinks they can leap up eight feet. But they have claws and like any cats, they can climb. We are searching the airport grounds...” the news—the searching is being done by the National Guard carrying standard military rifles and grenades, and accompanied by lion-sniffing dogs. But please do not panic.” “Why not?” “There is only the most remote possible danger from these lions. They are full of deer meat for one thing. We don’t even know for sure that they are here. There are only two of them so the odds of any one person seeing them are low. And of course, if they are still here, they are probably on the airport grounds. And when we have them rounded up, which I expect will happen later today, we will re-open the airport and, just to reassure everybody, I will have a press conference in front of the main entrance to the airport tomorrow at noon.” “Are the lions just going to be rounded up? Not shot on sight?” “Absolutely not shot on sight. Here in America, an African lion is a rarity. It is on the endangered species list in North America. If you see one, you can be arrested if you kill it.” “How long would it take before Rebecca has cubs?” a reporter asked. “No more questions,” the mayor said.


DAN’S PAPERS

danspapers.com

January 10, 2014 Page 21

This Week’s Cover Artist: Joe Chierchio By STEPHANIE DE TROY

This week’s cover artist, Joe Chierchio, has done 14 covers for Dan’s Papers, each time enjoying the challenge of coming up with something new and quintessentially “Hamptons.” This time, he’s taken a departure from his typically very colorful palette in favor of something starker and more seasonal. The timing could not have been better for his submission, as East Enders begin to emerge from the recent blizzard. I had the great opportunity to chat with Chierchio about the cover image and his current projects. Is this cover, “Winterfeed,” a recent work? Yes, I just finished it within a month or two. We have a house in Water Mill where there’s a barn and a corral, which we’ve donated to Amaryllis Farm. My finacée, who is a sculptor (and who also loves horses) and I see people come in all kinds of weather and take care of the horses. You sculpt too, right? Yes, stone carving and bronzes. In fact some of my marble sculptures are at Chrysalis Gallery on Main Street in Southampton. Some of my drawings and paintings are at Arthur Kalaher’s gallery on Jobs Lane.

Oh, wow, I’m going to check that out this week. So, how long have you been coming out East? Almost 20 years. Since then I’ve had a lot of shows out there. In fact, one of the Dan’s Papers covers that I really like was of Candy Kitchen in Bridgehampton, and in it my friends are standing outside, leaning against their antique Packard. It was a fun cover, very nostalgic. I love the challenge of coming up with new ideas for the cover. I try to make it of the local scene, whether it’s an iconic spot like Wölffer or Candy Kitchen…I like to do the local color of the Hamptons. I was in the advertising business for 40 years, with Grey Advertising, and this is the most fun I’ve had, coming up with something apropos for out there. I do get the feeling of nostalgia in your work, especially that Brooklyn Diner one I see on your website. I love nostalgia. I love capturing the way things were, especially in the ’50s and ’60s, when I was growing up in New York. I love that diner over near 57th Street. A funny story about that one—I was having a show in Italy and it was included in the show and I got a call from someone who wanted to buy it for the owner of the Brooklyn Diner, a friend of his, but we couldn’t reach a deal. Back in the city, I was showing it again and this time the son of the owner saw it and ended up buying it for his father. So you never know who’s going to buy

Family Owned Made In USA

So where can people go in the city to see your current work? The Gallery of Graphic Arts near Gracie Mansion is showing a series I just did from scenes in Charles Schultz Park. New Yorkers love scenes of their city. Yes, they do. I do a lot of scenes of Central Park. I live two blocks from the park so I go there every day with a sketchpad and a camera. I’ve also been working on some illustrations for the Hampton Jitney; people gathering there, getting off the bus. It’s such a Hamptons scene. In one of them, Dan is getting off the bus, reading his paper. I love to tell stories in my work, a little bit like one of my favorites, Norman Rockwell. He did 350 covers for the Saturday Evening Post and every one of them was terrific. Every one of them told a story. I really like the tree branching out behind the horses in this drawing, and that sliver of sunshine along the horizon. I usually put a lot of color and I had to stop myself with this one and just go with muted tones and just a little color in the sky. I wanted it to have that feeling of the cold, and the person who comes to feed the horses on a cold winter’s day. I like the message in this one; people doing good in some way, whether it’s with people or with animals.

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Page 22 January 10, 2014

DAN’S PAPERS

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The Business of Driving in the Snow By BOB GELBER

No one drove four-wheel drive cars when I grew up. In fact, the only company that made a 4WD vehicle was Willys Jeep, which produced a rather crude civilian version of a WWII army Jeep. Most people made do with large, heavy rear-wheel drive American cars with stick shifts. When it snowed, everyone knew the tricks of how to go in the snow. The big winners in the snow were the cars that had snow tires on their rear wheels. True diehards slapped chains around their rear wheels. Oh, and what a relief it was to drive with snow chains in heavy snow. However, they made a terrific racket, with a clanging that sounded like something bad was about to happen beneath your car, especially on concrete. Also, you had to be insane to drive faster than 40 miles per hour with chains. That was the state-of-the-art of driving on packed snow in those days. Drivers have to have some old-fashioned respect for snow on the highways, especially if you think ice could be lurking under the white stuff. I have vivid memories of sliding about 200 feet in my 1954 Jaguar XK120MC coupe, feeling like a passenger and not the driver as it slid in slow motion into a Buick. I was just a clueless college kid who didn’t know about ice

hiding under snow. Another time I was driving in a blinding and blowing snowstorm in Vermont at night in my Citroen ID 19 when I blasted through a truck-high snow drift blocking the road. When I finally stopped my sliding, unique-shaped French car and looked back, I was stunned to see a perfect silhouette of the Citroen cut out through the 10 foot high snow drift. Lesson learned. Look out for snow drifts, especially in the dark, and vive la France. Today, everything is different. When I’m driving in the snow I see SUVs of all types driving past me at speeds that were impossibly dangerous years ago. I quietly Not as good in the snow as one would think wonder if the total lack of respect for snow conditions and the false security to have use of this beast of a motor vehicle. of four-wheel drive has actually made winter I felt like General Patton, driving this diesel driving more perilous. Do folks realize that powered dreadnaught. The funny thing that I even though four-wheel drive vehicles go much discovered about the Hummer is that it wasn’t better in the snow than they did years ago, they very good in the snow. It was skittish. I felt do not stop any better? In fact, they may not perhaps the suspension was too stiff, and then stop as well because they are heavier. True, realized it was probably designed to go in soft ABS brakes help, but don’t help that much desert sand, and not wet slippery stuff. Lesson when ice is hanging around to ruin your day. learned; don’t judge a book by its cover. Here Years ago, when the original US Army Hummer was the most accomplished-looking SUV in the was introduced for sale in the United States, world, which was a wallflower when it came AM General lent me a new Hummer for a week time to go in the snow. Beware, the same can to use in the Hamptons. It was in the middle be said for many SUVs when the white stuff gets of a snow-covered winter and I was delighted seriously angry.

It’s Throwback Thursday! This year, I’ve made all of my typical, passive resolutions to be more organized, more productive, etc… But I’ve decided to make two concrete ones as well. One, I’ll make my bed every day. And two, I’ll stop hating January and February. That’s luckily becoming easier, as new events seem to be popping up during the off season out here. I missed Nancy Altas’s inaugural Fireside Session last week, but I’m planning on spending this Friday in Sag Harbor. Also coming up is the first-ever Hamptons Wellness Week. Hosted by One Healthy Hamptons, the event begins on January 12 and consists of $5 fitness classes at over 15 studios between Montauk and Westhampton, as well as various leactures. Reminiscing about the past is slightly less productive that resolving to be better in the future, but after a solid two weeks of holiday relaxation, I’m in more of a reflective mood. I’m sure fans of social media have noticed the #tbt trend that often accompanies Thursday posts. Throwback Thursday. Though the hashtag is more of a project for photogs than wordsmiths, here are 10 #tbts I’d like to share anyway: 1. Snow on the beach this past week. Friday brought balmy temps of 9 degrees, but I was

able to muster up enough season is in full force, and energy to dig my little VW this is the last year that bug out of the driveway and the Isles will play… on the make my way to Coopers Island. I haven’t been to a Beach. Snow-blasted dunes game yet this season, but turn a rosy shade of pink as there’s nothing like the the sun sets. excitement of live hockey. 2. Happy last-month Plus, this is the only venue birthday to East Ender I’ve been to where the line Jimmy Buffett, who turned for the lady’s bathroom is 67 on Christmas day. significantly shorter than When’s he going to give the men’s. Score! another surprise concert at 7. Hummus. I’ve recently the Talkhouse? started buying the family 3. Baseball. Nothing size, which I’ve just realized significant happened in exists. I could go through the world of the Mets this the entire tub in one sitting. past week, but I spent 8. The brunch I made this considerable time hanging weekend. I cut an avocado out with my family, in half lengthwise and put dreaming about what 2014 it in a pan with a little bit of could hold. In typical Mets Sunset at Coopers Beach, Southampton olive oil. In a separate pan, fashion, the organization has fry an egg. Place the cooked yet to announce the date the pitchers and egg into the center of the avocado, sprinkle on a catchers will report. But they’ll have to show few tomatoes and voilà! A homemade, designer up at some point. And then baseball season will brunch. be here. 9. There was a time not so long ago that I 4. Wake Forest beat UNC on Sunday for the was excited for Moe’s Mondays with its $5 first time since 2010. Epic. burritos all day. But I’ve since turned into a La 5. I’ve started training for my half marathon Hacienda convert. The ingredients are fresher, in Central Park on February 23. I’m crossing my the burritos larger, the experience just better. fingers that the city won’t be encapsulated in a 10. Dunkin Donuts’ has 99 cent iced coffee all “Polar Vortex” that morning. month. Luckily, my addition to iced coffee is not 6. The idea of the New York Islanders. Hockey dependant on the weather. Stay warm! K. Laffey

By kelly laffey


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DAN’S PAPERS

January 10, 2014 Page 23

By MATTHEW APFEL

My name is Matt and I’m a tech-aholic. I am completely powerless and cannot stop using my smartphone. Whether it’s the middle of the night or attending my son’s soccer practice, I constantly struggle with my desperate need to connect, to browse, to text. I wasn’t born this way. In fact, I’m so old that when I grew up, we had one TV in our entire home. It had 13 channels and rabbit ears. There wasn’t even a computer; we used typewriters and this gooey substance called White-Out. Smartphones were for Captain Kirk and Mr. Spock. Now, I fear that my compulsive weakness is spreading to my family. My beloved wife owns two phones, two tablets and a laptop. She tries to text on multiple devices at the same time and it’s pretty funny. I’ve observed this behavior and it’s highly disturbing. My kids are also getting in on the action. My daughters complete their homework assignments online and speak in strange acronyms like YOLO and IDK. WTF?? The worst part? Whenever I’m at the park, my son refuses to run around unless I chase him while pretending to be the Ape from Temple Run. This cycle of addiction is hopeless!! What am I to do?? OK, back to reality. Much of that “confession”

was actually true, except for the part about the despair. I’m Dr. Gadget, so I need to embrace this stuff at all times. All kidding aside, there is a growing phenomenon across our great land. It’s called technology overload, and scientists insist it’s real. How real is it? Well, hospitals have started offering in-patient treatment to help people break their phone addictions. Concerned corporations have adopted “leave your phone at home” Fridays. Madonna was banned from a movie theater chain because she couldn’t stop texting during a film screening. There are even online support groups for computer addiction, which is highly ironic since you have to log in… using your computer. Personally, I’m on the fence. On one hand, I’m all for getting back to nature and sparking increased human contact. But at this rate, it wouldn’t surprise me if class action lawsuits arose just like with the tobacco industry— demanding millions from tech companies for all our pain and suffering on smartphones. Maybe that’s why Apple is hoarding $500 billion in cash. The good news: there are some easy steps we can take to combat our technology addictions. At home, we can pledge to read more books and get more exercise. Stepping away from your house or apartment creates a natural break from all the gadgets inside. Amazon has offered to help; they put a timer on Kindle tablets, which automatically shuts them down

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Confessions of a Technology Addict

Addicted to technology? Yes.

whenever kids spend too much time playing games or watching movies. I’ve found that small, simple steps like these improve my listening skills and get me more engaged with my family. How about at the office? Not so easy. I force myself to turn off email for one hour a day, no matter how busy I am. Problem is, when I log back on, I have 400 emails to sift through, which just pushes the pile down the road. I also refrain from bringing my phone to most group meetings, where I’ll be tempted and distracted. But then I show up and everyone else is checking email, so why should I be the only one abstaining? Fact is, we’ve become so reliant on technology in the workplace that we struggle to perform without it. I sometimes wonder whether all the increased productivity really translates into better ideas, more efficient workers and safer products. What do you think?

Hitting the Big Time for the New Year This is it, I’ve hit the big time. I’m 11 years old and this is my first year at the adult table for our family New Year’s celebration. I’ll be seen as a peer, able to wise-crack and joke which will now be interpreted as being cool instead of getting me a back hand to the face. I’ve got to handle this just right or I won’t be able to sit here again next year. I’ll start with a quick study of the occupants at the table. I will make a mental note of something pithy and smooth that I might be able to say at just the right time, allowing them a glimpse into my brilliant and subtly sophisticated mind. Now let’s see, Aunt Alice just had something done at the doctor’s office but I don’t know what. She keeps a secret bottle of vodka in a tall boot in the back of her closet. I could make a joke about that. I mean, we all know about it, but we all pretend we don’t know about it, and when she says she never touches a drop, we all pretend to believe her. Then there’s Uncle Joe the cheap SOB. I only recently learned that when he’s in earshot, we just call him Uncle Joe. Ever since I can remember, he’s been Uncle Joe the cheap SOB. Apparently when he gives people money to get him cigarettes he counts the change. And sometime before I was born he tried to figure out

how many beers he drank from the keg at a party and insisted on paying for his estimated portion instead of going in equal with the group. Maybe I could make a joke about that. “Hey Uncle Joe how much do you think you ate of that 18 pound turkey? Eight bucks worth?” That oughta get a good laugh. I’ll add a knowing smile. I can just see the surprised look on my mother’s face at my ability to pull off such sophisticated humor. Aunt Margaret is bringing her third husband to the dinner. Dad doesn’t like him, but says that at least he’s keeping Aunt Margaret “off the pole.” She met him at a restaurant where she was a dancer. Dad yells that It’s a New Year on The Rock! she’s shallow and would’ve never married the guy if he didn’t have a lot of money. You can’t wake him up too quickly if he’s Mom yells back he never would’ve married asleep in the recliner. He talks very loud and her if she didn’t look the way she does with doesn’t listen to anyone. He won’t wear his her store-bought boobs. And Mom’s not too hearing aids. He’s the oldest and therefore sure if her diamond ring is real, “that so-called gets two carves of turkey. Mom holds her diamond ring is as fake as the rest of her.” breath every time he reaches for the big knife. Maybe I could work in a joke about fake turkey Apparently, there is an actual method to slicing breasts. “Hey Aunt Margaret, how much do you meat off the turkey that does not involve the think the turkey paid for those breasts, eh?” poor little turkey looking like he was hit by That should go over well. Smart, slick, a little a grenade. Yup. My first time at the big table and I’m risqué, but what the heck, you’re only 11 once. Grampa still thinks he’s in Korea on occasion. ready. Bigstock.om

By sally flynn


DAN’S PAPERS

Page 24 January 10, 2014

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current anchor Savannah Guthrie called in from vacation to wish him well, and Al Roker sent birthday greetings via live video feed from California. Nine West founder Vince Camuto has reportedly sold Wooldon Manor, his 10,000-square-foot Southampton estate, for $75 million. The property, listed for $48 million last July, had a price bump because the buyers also purchased an additional eight acres of land. The sale is believed to be a record for the Hamptons.

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Dan’s Papers Web Editor Brendan J. O’Reilly and his longtime girlfriend, flutist Allison Bourquin, have announced their engagement! A 2015 wedding in Bellport is planned. We’re also happy to report that Brendan has fully recovered from the hot oil incident that was captured on video at DansPapers.com

Saturday, January 18th Enjoy Wine and Cheese by the Fireplace 5:00 to 7:00 pm at the Southampton Inn

Marvin Hamlisch, a longtime Hamptons resident who lived in both Westhampton Beach and Sag Harbor, was the subject of a new American Masters series documentary on PBS last month. Hamlisch, a Pulitzer Prize recipient who passed away in 2012, was a Broadway composer and songwriter. Among his most famous credits are A Chorus Line and hit songs “The Way We Were” and “Nobody Does It Better.” His work won many awards, including Grammys and Oscars.

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DAN’S PAPERS

January 10, 2014 Page 25

NEWS BRIEFS Compiled by kelly laffey

EAST HAMPTON: The 7th annual Hamptons Marathon, held on September 28, has announced that it will donate $30,000 to Project MOST. Amanda Moszkowski and Diane Weinberger, founders of the Hamptons Marathon, will visit Project MOST at the John Marshall Elementary School on January 16 to present the program with this year’s donation. Each year after the race, the Hamptons Marathon team makes donations to support local East End groups. This year the Hamptons Marathon donated more than $75,000, including $30,000 each to Southampton Hospital and Project Most. This was their largest donation to date. In addition, the race supports the Springs School, the Springs School PTA’s K–3 extracurricular swimming program, the East Hampton Day Care Learning Center and East Hampton Youth Football. This year, the race also made a small donation to support runners affected by the Boston Marathon bombing last April through the One Fund Boston. Over the past seven years, the Hamptons Marathon has donated over $350,000 to support local East Hampton organizations.

Long Island Aquarium to Offer Half Off Admission RIVERHEAD: It may be winter, but you can “just keep swimming!” For the month of January, enjoy half-off admission at the Long Island Aquarium & Exhibition Center in Riverhead. The discount is valid Mondays through Fridays after 2:30 p.m. and also includes the Exhibition Center’s Butterflies & Birds. People hoping to take advantage of this offer must mention the half-price discount at the time of purchase, and the offer is not applicable online. The aquarium is located at 431 East Main Street, Riverhead.

Two True’s Beaked Whales Wash Up in the Hamptons HAMPTONS: Two True’s beaked whales washed up in the Hamptons this week. The rarely seen whale first appeared beached off of Gin Lane in Southampton Village on Sunday, January 5. On Monday, a second whale came ashore The juvenile True’s beaked whale in Bridgehampton in Bridgehampton. (See video at DansPapers.com.) The first cetacean was discovered Sunday at Little Plains Beach in Southampton Village. The Riverhead Foundation for Marine Research and Preservation came to the beach, but the whale was already dead when they arrived. It was transported to the foundation’s facility in Riverhead for a necropsy—an animal autopsy—to determine the factors that led to its death. The whale discovered on Monday, between Mecox Beach and W. Scott Cameron Beach, a little west of the Mecox Cut, is a juvenile. While the juvenile, which was also deceased, could fit in the back of a pick-up truck for transportation, an adult True’s beaked whale can grow up to 17 feet long. The female found Sunday was 15.5 feet long. Robert DiGiovanni, the director and senior biologist of the Riverhead Foundation, noted, ”The rescue program in New York has only encountered two in the last 30 years.” Results of the necropsies were not available at press time. Brendan J. O’Reilly

Project MOST to Receive $30,000 from the Hamptons Marathon

East End Towns Outline Provisions for Christmas Tree Disposal HAMPTONS: Do we have to admit that the holidays are over and the dreary days of January are here? Since the East End towns have outlined their provisions for Christmas tree disposal, seems like the answer is yes. For the month of January, three Southampton Town recycling centers will accept natural Christmas trees for no charge. The service is available for town residents only—including residents of the villages that are within the town. Decorations, lights and wires must be removed first. The town does not pick up trees at curbside. Trees may be dropped off at the North Sea center, 1370 Majors Path, seven days a week, the Hampton Bays center, 30 Jackson Avenue, seven days a week, and Westhampton center, 66 Old Country Road, six days a week, closed Wednesdays. Hours at all three locations are 8 a.m. through 4 p.m. The Sag Harbor center is not taking trees. The trees will be mulched and that mulch will be free to residents in the spring. All of the recycling centers will be closed January 20. On February 1, regular brush fees will resume. A tree would likely cost just $5 to dispose of, though brush fees range as high as $30 per load. Residents of East Hampton Town and East Hampton Village can leave their trees curbside and the respective highway departments will pick them up. Alternatively, residents can bring their trees to the sanitation department at 260 Springs Fireplace Road. Southold Town does not have a town-wide collection policy. Residents should follow the disposal guidelines outlined at their local recycling center or dump. Riverhead Town residents can also put their trees out with their garbage, and the garbage carter will pick them up.

Schneiderman Named Suffolk Legislature’s Deputy Presiding Officer SUFFOLK COUNTY: County Legislator Jay Schneiderman, a Montauk Independence Party member, has been chosen as the Suffolk Legislature’s Deputy Presiding Officer, second to new Presiding Officer DuWayne Gregory, of Amityville. Formerly a Republican, Schneiderman now caucuses with the Democrats for a 12–6 majority in the Legislature. The majority caucus voted unanimously for both Gregory and Schneiderman at a December 20 meeting, then made their decision official at the Legislature’s annual organizational meeting January 2, the first business day of the year. Scheiderman, who serves the South Fork, was re-elected in November for his sixth and final two-year term, defeating challenger Chris Nuzzi, of Westhampton Beach, with 60% of the vote. He is now the longestserving member of the Legislature and, by virtue of his longevity, he chaired the organizational meeting. “I would like to thank my colleagues for this great opportunity,” Schneiderman said. “I look forward to working with Presiding Officer DuWayne Gregory and the county executive towards a proactive agenda and to be a strong voice for Suffolk County.” Schneiderman’s office said his priorities over the next two years are mental health issues, poverty, public transportation and fiscal issues, as well as environmental concerns such as improving water quality and reducing incidents of Lyme disease and other tick-borne illnesses. As the deputy, Schneiderman assumes the presiding officer’s responsibilities in the event of his absence. He is the first member of the Independence Party to hold leadership at the county level. Gregory replaces Wayne Horsley, of Babylon, who left to become regional director of Long Island State Parks.


DAN’S PAPERS

Page 26 January 10, 2014

DAN’S GOES TO...

Sarah Brady and Father Mike Vetrano

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Basilica of the Sacred Hearts Family Christmas Pageant 2013 On a crisp evening, more than 300 children and live animals made the season bright with the Christmas Pageant held at Basilica of the Sacred Hearts of Jesus & Mary in Southampton. Photographs by Daniel Gonzalez

Samantha Brenner as Mary with John Paul Ferrantino as Joseph

Angels take part in the Christmas Pageant

Little Head Thinks at the Talkhouse

Jettykoon Winter Solstice at the Talkhouse Tom Muse’s Jettykoon took the stage to celebrate the Winter Solstice at the Stephen Talkhouse in Amagansett, heating up the season with their original acoustic groove rock. Photograph by Daniel Gonzalez

The trio Little Head Thinks rocked the Stephen Talkhouse with their rock/rap mix of covers and hot originals. Photographs by Daniel Gonzalez

2.

1.

Jettykoon's Thomas Muse with Matty Liot and Abby Levin on drums

3.

1. Little Head Thinks' lead singer Josh Brussell 2. Little Head Thinks' lead guitarist Bosco 3. Ryan Connor, the Talkhouse doorman

New Year's Eve at Gurney's Inn in Montauk It was that time of year again at Gurney's Inn on the ocean in Montauk. Guests dressed in Gatsby-themed outfits and enjoyed Gurney's 51st annual New Year's Eve Party, with an evening of dancing, cocktails, a show, music and a delicious five-course dinner. Photographs by Richard Lewin

1.

3.

2.

1. Gurney's Inn General Manager Paul Monte with Venus Yunker 2. Ken Walles (Owner of the Oceanside Beach Resort), Joe Gaviola (Chairman of the Board of Suffolk County National Bank) and Carl Darenberg (Owner of Montauk Marine Basin) 3. "Texas Guinan" (Velaine Pfund) with The Gurney's Gatsby Crew


DAN’S PAPERS

danspapers.com

January 10, 2014 Page 27 WINERIES

NORTH FORK EVENTS

Drink in the whole North Fork!

So much to see and do this weekend!

Peconic Ballet Steps It Up in Riverhead By gianna volpe

A

s downtown Riverhead undergoes a blockby-block renaissance, one of its newest members, the Peconic Ballet Theatre, has proved they have the moves to please the court. The dance studio celebrates its first year this month and owner Christiana Bitonti said she is already feeling at home on Main Street. “I love the community in Riverhead and the whole vibe of Main Street,” said Bitonti, an East End native. “Everybody has been really welcoming and they’re willing to really help you out and partner up, so that has helped the business grow pretty quickly in just a year.” Bitonti, 27, said her mission as head mistress of the Peconic Ballet Theatre is to provide a local venue for professional dance education, adding that as a child, she often needed to travel up island or to the city for suitable instruction. “We bring New York City choreographers and teachers out here to teach our students, so they don’t have to go there,” she said. “We have programs for kids that just want to take a ballet class, but for those who really want more serious dance training we have an apprentice class that’s by invitation or audition only, where dancers take classes five days a week in ballet and other styles. We also have master classes on the weekends.” All classes at the Peconic Ballet Theatre will be performing in their “Blank Canvas” exhibition on January 12, the Theatre’s one-year anniversary.

Leading up to it, Bitonti began instruction for that show by focusing entirely on technique. “It’s so important for us to build a really strong foundation and give our dancers the tools they need to perform and create,” she said. “Those tools are specific to the genre and what the dancer wants to pursue, but if I were going to focus in on ballet, it would be all about posture and technique— their turnout, their feet, their alignment, using and strengthening their muscles, as well as teaching them the vocabulary and vernacular. There’s so much involved in making a beautiful ballet dancer. It’s not just about learning the steps.” Nine-year-old Selena Pereyra of Westhampton Beach said Bitonti’s instruction in the past year has exponentially informed her abilities as a ballerina. “When I first started dancing, I could barely do a jump,” said Selena. “Now I can do a penche.” Penche is a classic ballet pose where one leg is extended behind the body with toes pointed toward the ceiling while the ballerina leans forward with the other leg on the floor in front of them. Bitonti said she encourages all her dancers to give themselves time in the morning and at night to work on increasing flexibility or strengthening muscles and students also do crunches and other exercises in class to get their bodies in top dancing shape, but Bitonti added exercise regimens depend entirely on the student. “Dancing has such a creative element and each dancer is an individual artist, so it’s hard to say which exercises are the most beneficial to a dancer,”

NORTH FORK

FRIDAY, JANUARY 10

Spirits of Long Island 6 p.m. (see below, left) Nicholas Chowske

Arts & Galleries Listings pg. 31, Calendar pg. 34, Kids’ Calendar pg. 36

friday, january 10

FRIDAY NIGHT LIVE MUSIC AT OREGON ROAD 6–9 p.m. Live music every Friday night. Local beer, light fare. Lieb Cellars Oregon Road, 13050 Oregon Road, Cutchogue. 631-734-1100 facebook.com/fridaynightsoregonroad THE SPIRITS OF LONG ISLAND 6 p.m. Wine workshops led by Allen Katz, spirits expert. Tasting menu prepared by Jedediah Hawkins Inn executive chef Richard Kanowsky. $95. 400 South Jamesport Avenue, Jamesport. 631-722-2900

saturday, january 11 LIVE MUSIC AT MARTHA CLARA VINEYARDS 1–4 p.m. Free admission. 6025 Sound Avenue, Riverhead. 631-298-0075 marthaclaravineyards.com LIVE MUSIC EVERY SATURDAY AT LENZ WINERY 2–5 p.m. Also on Sundays. The Lenz Winery, 38355 Main Road (Route 25), Peconic. 631-734-6010 lenzwine.com LIVE MUSIC AT LIEB CELLARS OREGON ROAD 2–6 p.m. Rain or shine. Open every day from 12­ –7. 13050 Oregon Road, Cutchogue. 631-298-1942 liebcellars.com

Peconic Ballet Theatre, 71 East Main Street, Riverhead. 631-591-1539. Peconicballettheatre.org.

OPICK OF THE WEEK

For more events happening this week, check out:

LIVE MUSIC AT TWEED’S 7–10 p.m. Various artists on Friday Nights. 17 East Main Street, Riverhead. 631-208-3151 tweedsrestaurant.com

she said. “When working with students I have to see who needs this exercise or that one. It’s like training a painter or a sculptor or any other artist.” Bitonti only allows 12 students admittance to any given class, allowing her and other instructors to closely observe each dancer and get to know them on an intimate level. This relates to one of the most important aspects of the job for Bitonti—who received her master’s degree in counseling from NYU—the social aspect of dance classes and their effects on the developing psyche. “I did my whole thesis on after-school activities and it definitely showed from my research that creating something with other people—and having something to be connected to—builds self-esteem and self worth,” she said. “At the end of the day, the most important thing is for all of my students to feel good about themselves—no matter how strong they love dance or ballet—no matter what they choose to pursue or do in their lives.” Ten-year-old Chloe Vargas of East Quogue spoke to this when she said she not only loves Peconic Ballet Theatre because it offers instruction in multiple dance styles, but because she’s able to spend more time with school friends and others. “I like it here because there’s a lot of good friends from school that dance here,” she said with a smile. “But I’ve also made a lot of new friends.”

Raphael Vineyard and Winery, Peconic

sunday, january 12 LIVE MUSIC AT MARTHA CLARA VINEYARDS 1–4 p.m. Free admission. 6025 Sound Avenue, Riverhead. 631-298-0075 marthaclaravineyards.com LIVE MUSIC AT JAMESPORT VINEYARDS 2–4 p.m. Featuring Nick Kerzner. Music every Sunday in the winter. Jamesport Vineyards, 1216 Main Road, Jamesport. 631-722-5256 jamesportwines.com

Monday, january 13 MONDAY NIGHTS AT LOVE LANE KITCHEN 4 p.m. Weekly. Enjoy $15 meals such as a grassfed beef burger, cheese and fried and more. Love Lane Kitchen, 240 Love Lane, Mattituck. 631-298-8989 WININ’ CHEESE AT MARTHA CLARA VINEYARDS 2–5 p.m. Free admission. 6025 Sound Avenue, Riverhead. 631-298-0075 marthaclaravineyards.com

tuesday, january 14 THEWINEPROJECT AT THERIVERHEADPROJECT 7 p.m. Guest vino aficionados host this unique, family style gathering featuring conversations with wine and food. theRIVERHEADPROJECT, 300 East Main Street, Riverhead. 631-284-9300 theriverheadproject.com

wednesday, january 14 GIRLS NIGHT OUT AT COOPERAGE INN 3:30–10 p.m. Enjoy $5 appetizers & cosmos, $15 full dinner menu, & more specials. Every Wednesday, 2218 Sound Avenue, Calverton. 631-727-8994 cooperageinn.com LADIES NIGHT & KARAOKE AT THE ALL STAR 8–11 p.m. $5 Ladies bowling & drink specials. 7 p.m., Karaoke at the Stadium. The AllStar, 96 Main Road, Riverhead. 631-998-3565 theallstar.com

friday, january 15 STEEL MAGNOLIAS AT NORTH FORK COMMUNITY THEATRE 8 p.m. Through 2/2. Beloved play by Robert Harling. A comedic drama set in Louisiana. $15. North Fork Community Theatre, 12700 Old Sound Avenue, Mattituck. 631-298-4500 “THEBEERPROJECT” AT THERIVERHEADPROJECT RESTAURANT Call for times, limited seating. Beer dinner pairing/communal table/family style. $40 per person. Featuring Captain Lawrence Brewing Company. theRIVERHEADPROJECT, 300 East Main Street, Riverhead. 631-284-9300 theriverheadproject.com For more events and to list your event online, go to Events.DansPapers.com. Events submitted by noon on Friday will be considered for the print calendar.


DAN’S PAPERS

Page 28 January 10, 2014

danspapers.com

BOOK REVIEW

ART EVENTS

“The Heart of Everything That Is”

Openings, closings see and be seen.

New Play Premieres at Bay Street Theatre By lee meyer

B

ay Street Theatre’s 2014 Mainstage Season, the first season under new Artistic Director Scott Schwartz, will include the world premiere of Conviction, by Carey Crim. Schwartz will direct the new drama, which centers around a beloved husband, neighbor and teacher whose reputation is rocked by a student’s accusation that he behaved inappropriately. Conviction will have the distinction of “co-premiering” in California and Canada, and Crim can’t wait to see the response. DAN’S Paper

“The play is about a beloved teacher and his family and another couple and their son. The teacher is the “teacher of the year,” the kind that we all remember, that inspired us in some way, and because of that he’s a bit of rule-breaker,” Crim explains. “He gets in trouble because of an accusation of sexual misconduct and it’s the fallout from that, especially among his family. It’s he-said-she-said; it’s an issue that’s been tackled before, but I wanted to focus on what the accusation does to his family.” Originally an actress, Crim found her calling as JRaVERTICAL x 9.125 playwright by6.187 accident. “I was a theater major at

Playwright Carey Crim

And many more hits...

embeR 7th

Rock & Blues legend

“One of the top 100 guitarists of all time.”

Friday, February 7 - Rolling Stone Magazine

th

Tickets go on sale Jan 10th

KICKOFF PARTY

Enjoy wines from local wineries with music by

the Box Office!

Jack Simmons in

BUDDY’S GIFT Imagine the Brady Brunch met the Sixth Sense...

GENE CASEY & THE LONE SHARKS

Listen and laugh as Jack shares a heartfelt and comical tale -

Friday, January 17Th

Friday, January 31sT

BAKITHI KUMALO & MAMBO LOCO

A compelling performance about a father who never stopped loving his family, even after he died!

doors & bar open at 6PM. dinner served from 7PM on.

doors, restaurant & bar open at 6:30PM. show begins at 8PM.

For updated information on tickets, shows or dinner: Visit SuffolkTheater.com, call (631) 727-4343 or stop in the box office! TREaT youRSElf To a nighT ouT in ouR bEauTifully RESToREd 1933 aRT dEco ThEaTER. Enjoy a Show fRoM ThE coMfoRT of youR own TablE wiTh a full MEnu and SpEcialTy dRinkS availablE. SEaTing vaRiES by Show.

coME SEE foR youRSElf!

118 East Main St., Riverhead 11901

24423

Northwestern University, and [focused on being an] actor and was in Los Angeles for a while,” Crim says. “I did the rounds on a couple TV projects, and I was in London for a while at the Royal Court Theater. I came back [home to] Michigan on what was sort of supposed to be a pit stop at the Purple Rose Theatre Company.” Crim had begun to write her own audition monologues, “Even though you’re not supposed to do that! I made up the name of the plays and the writers and ended up getting better feedback on the monologues than the actual performances. I heard from a director, who wanted to find the monologue, and I came clean [that I created it] and he asked me if I’d ever write it, because he’d like to read it. I ended up sending it to Purple Rose Theatre for feedback, and they ended up producing it.” The play, Growing Pretty, was a hit. Purple Rose Theatre Company, which often featured work by the iconic Lanford Wilson, became an artistic home base for Crim, who credits Wilson as one of her inspirations. “Lanford Wilson probably—unknowingly—became a mentor of mine. Just watching him work, before I even knew I wanted to be a writer, he would work right up until his plays premiered. And if he could be that way with his work, who am I not to look at my plays from every angle? But by the time I was writing in earnest, it was near the end of his life.” Crim has been developing Conviction for some time. “It’s had more readings than any other play I’ve written or workshopped,” Crim says. “I have heard that a play can be lost in the workshop process. I really tried to be aware of that and use every workshop to deepen and sharpen what it already has. It has become what I was always going for; just getting to see it with different actors, you usually don’t get to see it until the rehearsal process. Realizing where the holes are… It’s very exciting.” Now a New York resident, Crim is excited to work in the Hamptons. “I’ve lived in New York for so many years, and haven’t been to the Hamptons!” she laughs. Conviction is a co-production by Bay Street Theatre, the Rubicon Theatre in California, the Royal Manitoba Theatre of Canada and Dead Posh Productions in London, England. “It really is my first New York play,” Crim explains. “I self-produced a play once, but this is my first full production here.” Crim is looking forward to collaborating with Schwartz. She enthuses, “I think Scott is going to do some wonderful things.” To buy a 2014 Mainstage Season subscription to Bay Street Theatre in Sag Harbor, call 631-725-9500. More information is available at baystreet.org.


arts & entertainment

danspapers.com

January 10, 2014 Page 29

New Biography Hits Shelves, Breaks Hearts “Welcome to the beautiful Black Hills of South Dakota, a place where the Wild West comes alive.” And so begins an online hospitality ad. Understandably, nothing is said about the contentious debate going on in the area over a proposed uranium mine. Although the Black Hills are well known as home to the Mount Rushmore National Monument, it’s doubtful that many of the reported three million visitors a year know much about what tourist lingo refers to as “the first inhabitants,” or that many descendents of those first inhabitants would happily concur about “the rich and diverse heritage we all share.” A new book about the area, The Heart of Everything That Is: the Untold Story of Red Cloud, An American Legend by Bob Drury and Tom Clavin (Simon and Schuster), makes it clear, as Clavin says in an email, that the battle over the Black Hills “never really ended.” Perhaps it never will. Before he died last year, the Indian activist and actor Russell Means, an Oglala Lakota Sioux, like Red Cloud, condemned the uranium proposal as another government grab. The title of Drury and Clavin’s book is significant because for centuries the starkly beautiful Black Hills have been considered by the various Indian tribes who lived there sacred, Paha Sapa, “the heart of everything that is.” Although filled with extensive colonial history, the book focuses on the “charismatic” Red Cloud and on the Western territories at a critical time in the 19th century, two decades before South Dakota would become a state. The Civil War has just ended and western expansion is accelerating with the coming of the railroad and the introduction of ever-more efficient guns. Gold is rumored to be in the area, and U.S. forts are stringing out along new trade routes. As Red Cloud once said to his people: “The white man made me a lot of promises, and they only kept one. They promised to take my land, and they took it.” Although Sitting Bull, Crazy Horse and Geronimo are more familiar names, Red Cloud’s claim to fame is unique: as the authors show: Red Cloud (b. 1821), named for a meteorological occurrence at his birth, was, arguably, the 19th century’s most dynamic and successful Indian leader, even getting a war named after him: Red Cloud’s War (1866-1868), a great rout he spearheaded by uniting competing and hostile tribes to oppose the U.S. Army marching to destroy them in the Powder River country. Called Bluecoats, many soldiers were veterans of The Civil War and were well armed, but their entire battalion was wiped out by Red Cloud’s warriors, a humiliation for the U.S. Government that would presage the Indian victory a decade later at Little Bighorn. The Heart of Everything That Is abounds in scenes of savagery that the authors nonetheless render comprehensible. The clichéd phrase, “happy hunting ground,” for example, makes sense when understood as the place of The Great Spirit where the dead go in the exact physical condition they have left earth— which explains the torturing of an enemy. Gougedout eyes will not see the beauties of paradise; cut-off genitalia will prevent pleasure, hacked off limbs forbid hunting, the essence of Indian life. It should be noted, however, as the authors show, Hollywood notwithstanding, that the U.S. Army was not averse to scalping or mutilating the pubic areas of Indian women. What distinguishes Clavin and Drury’s compellingly told tale are several features: it’s not a polemic but a carefully researched narrative (with helpful maps), based on oral and written histories and interviews, some conducted with Red Cloud’s descendents at The Pine Ridge Indian Reservation (SD). Particularly

fascinating is the account of how the coming of the horse (mustangs by way of the Spanish) changed Indian life. Full of vicious details, the story makes for uncomfortable reading at times but for this fact is memorable. Especially among nomadic tribes such as the Sioux, war was “the reason for living,” and courage and bravery were particularly prized, In this regard, Red Cloud was preeminent for his strategic intelligence, uncompromising fierceness and shrewd aggressiveness—amazing achievements considering that he was five when his father died from alcoholism. The Heart of Everything That Is is a

thought-provoking work, especially about colliding cultures that turn on wholly different worldviews or mythic philosophies. Given the seemingly intractable so-called clash of civilizations today, the story they present gives pause. The book is also a good example of joint authorship, Clavin and Drury achieving a seamless style that includes effective shifts between present and past tense and spot-on imagery. On Wednesday, January 29, 2014, Tom Clavin will be speaking at the Rogers Memorial Library at noon as part of the Brown Bag Lunch and Book Chat series, myrml.org.

Join uS For FireSide SeSSionS nancy atlaS and FriendS with

By joan baum

@Bay Street theatre in January & FeBruary*!

Friday nightS at 8 pm this week Special guest

andy aledort guitarist

January 10 ❱

w/ andy aledort sideman for dicky Betts

January 17 ❱

w/ danny keane Funk and r&B keyboardist

January 24 ❱

w/ randi Fishenfeld electric violinist *tickets for this show $20

January 31 ❱ w/ Jonny rosch renowned blues singer

FeBruary ❱

special guests tBd ticketS are $15 general admiSSion

are available online at www.baystreet.org or by stopping at the Box office tuesday through Saturday from 11 a.m. - 5 p.m. or calling

631-725-9500

www.nancyatlas.com Sponsored by

31494


arts & entertainment

Page 30 January 10, 2014

danspapers.com

Ellen Dioguardi

Keeping Up With the Queens of East End Music

The whole gang: (from left) Joe Delia, Anthony Liberature, Abby Levin, Nicole Wilson, Inda Eaton, Randolph Hudson and Klyph Black

By ellen dioguardi

F

Ellen Dioguardi

or my husband and I, what started out as following a couple of favorite local bands has grown exponentially. In a magical kind of “six guitar strings of separation” game, following one band leads to another and before you know it there aren’t enough free nights or tread left on your tires to be at every performance of the musicians you’ve grown fond of. Eventually you start to see something other than just the great music—you start to see the people behind it. One of the most impressive things about so many in this talented group is what a supportive bunch they are. Nothing seems to exemplify that more than taking a look at the musical paths of two young women who’ve been inspired by this unique East End music community: Jewlee Trudden and Sara

Sara Hartman and Inda Eaton in performance

Hartman. Both of these young ladies (they are both under 21 years old) are talented, passionate about their music and count some of our best-known local musicians among their fans. They are, to different degrees, supported, inspired and in some cases guided, by a musical community that truly rocks. The thread of common names linking Jewlee and Sara include many local favorites; Inda Eaton, Cynthia Daniels, Mick Hargraves, Nancy Atlas, Klyph Black, Joe Delia, Anthony Libatore, Caroline Doctorow, Crossroads Music and I’m sure several others. The tangible contributions this community has made to their music and their young lives are best known by Jewlee and Sara, but it was clear to me upon interviewing them both that it’s had a powerful accumulative effect. “Me, Sara Hartman was on stage with Inda Eaton, Caroline Doctorow and Nancy Atlas. I mean WOW. The Queens of music out here and I was singing with them.” So declared a fresh-faced Sara Hartman in between saying “hi” to half of Sag Harbor as it passed by our table at SagTown Coffee. For Sara it was more than just inspiration from the “queens of music” that made a difference. She credits music Producer Cynthia Daniels with “pulling me out of a bad time” and calls Inda Eaton (who Sara performed with several times over the summer) and Inda’s wife Annemarie “something like my other moms.” This goes deeper than musical inspiration. This speaks to who the members of this musical community I keep referring to really are and it’s inspiring on many levels. Jewlee Trudden is all intensity, blood, sweat and rock and roll. Listening to her perform for the first time I was caught by how even though this was not “my” kind of music I was still transfixed. While Sara is settling into her first year at Berklee School of Music, Jewlee is touring, performing in Manhattan, upstate and in Florida. Already looking for a musical future of playing “bigger places with more people” she laughingly admits the life of an aspiring live musician “kicks your ass.” Michael Clark from Crossroads music gave Cynthia Daniels’ card to Jewlee a few years ago and so began what sounds like a very mutually fulfilling

Jewlee Trudden rocks out

connection. “Producing an artist with what we call ‘the curse of genius’ is one of the most inspiring and genuine experiences a person in my field can have.” claims Daniels, “Jewlee is a proliferate songwriter and player. We both took a chance on each other, and since we are still working together, that risk and reward relationship is ongoing.” Eaton and Daniels both have the most encouraging and heartwarming things to say about these young women. For me hearing about these relationships gave form and substance to the positive and uplifting energy so often felt at the live shows we’ve been attending. “Our East End music community is a generous group with a kind spirit that extends beyond public benefits, shows and appearances,” states Eaton. “For such a boisterous bunch—I can’t begin to tell you how many quiet and random acts of kindness I have witnessed behind the scenes and at the kitchen tables of the artists.”

On the Road By ELLEN DIOGUARDI

D

uring her winter school hiatus Sara Hartman returned home to Sag Harbor and performed at the Stephen Talkhouse’s “Outrageous Open Mic Nite” in Amagansett the day after Christmas and then had a solo show at the Grenning Gallery in Sag Harbor on January 3. After wowing the hometown crowds, Sara left for Nashville where she will be performing at a few venues, including an appearance this past Monday at The Basement, and she’ll be “making the rounds” with one of her many local mentors, Anthony Liberatore of East Hampton. Meanwhile Jewlee Truden and her band In Circles are gigging around the frozen North East with stops this Saturday at Sun Place in Boston, Hootie’s Goodtimes Café in Pawcatuck, CT on Sunday and The Velvet Lounge in DC on January 14.


arts & entertainment

danspapers.com

ART EVENTS For more events happening this week, check out: North Fork Calendar pg. 27, Calendar pg. 34, Kids’ Calendar pg. 36

openings and events ALMOND’S NINTH ARTISTS & WRITERS NIGHT FEATURING CHRISTINE SCIULLI Almond announces the ninth monthly “Artists & Writers Night” hosted by artist Christine Sciulli on Wednesday, 1/15 at 7 p.m. Sciulli currently has an installation at The Parrish Art Museum in the Artist Choose Artist show. A family style three-course menu created by executive chef Jason Weiner will be served. The cost is $40 in advance and $45 at the door with a glass of local wine or craft beer, tax and gratuity. Reservations are required. Almond Restaurant, 1 Ocean Road, Bridgehampton. 631-537-5665 almondrestaurant.com GUIDED TOURS AT PARRISH ART MUSEUM Sundays, Wednesdays and Saturdays at 2 p.m. Docent-led tours featuring highlights from the permanent collection. Tours last approximately one hour. Free with museum admission. 279 Montauk Highway, Water Mill. 631-283-2118 parrishart.org

call 631-537-0500 to advertise.

ongoing DANIEL GONZALEZ PHOTOGRAPHY Come to Salon Xavier and see the work of acclaimed photographer Daniel Gonzalez. Salon Xavier, 1A Bay Street, Sag Harbor. 631-725-6400 salonxavier.com STEPHEN ANTONAKOS, ALICE AYCOCK, MARY ELLEN BARTLEY, SUE HEATLEY, CONSTANTINO NIVOLA AND TONY ROSS Through 1/13. The Drawing Room hosts a group show featuring selected artists working in diverse mediums: Stephen Antonankos, paper cuts; Alice Aycock, drawings; Mary Ellen Bartley, photographs; Sue Heatley, relief prints; Costantino Nivola, tin; and Toni Ross, clay. The Drawing Room, 66 Newtown Lane, East Hampton. 631-324-5016 drawingroom-gallery.com ARTISTS CHOOSE ARTISTS AT PARRISH ART MUSEUM Through 1/14. Parrish Art Museum’s ongoing, juried exhibition that celebrates artists on the East End and the dynamic relationships that unite the area’s creative community. Jurors are: Laurie Anderson, Judith Hudson, Mel Kendrick, David Salle, Ned Smyth, Keith Sonnier and Robert Wilson. Artists include Elizabeth Dow, Elise Ansel, Koichiro Kurita, Ezra Thompson and more. Parrish Art Museum, 279 Montauk Highway, Water Mill. 631-283-2118 parrishart.org 9TH ANNUAL THANKSGIVING COLLECTIVE: THE WORLDS WE CREATE Works by Melanie Moczarski, Aakash Nihalani and Nick Weber. Using this annual show as a platform to introduce new artists to the gallery, they will present Jonathan Beer’s work for the first time. Through 1/14. Tripoli Gallery, 30 Jobs Lane, Southampton. 631-377-3715 tripoligallery.com REYNOLD RUFFINS RETROSPECTIVE AT JOHN JERMAIN An exhibition of colorful illustrations by Reynold Ruffins. Through 1/18. John Jermain Memorial Library, 34 West Water Street, Sag Harbor. 631-725-0049 johnjermain.org

January 10, 2014 Page 31

OPICK OF THE WEEK SUNDAYS, WEDNESDAYS, SATURDAYS

Tours of Parrish Art Museum (See below, left) DREAMS – ACRYLIC, OIL AND PENCIL ON PAPER BY GAIL MIRO Through 1/30. Gail Miro’s work of acrylic, oil and pencil on paper reflects her life’s experiences, especially living and painting in the New England mountains and the coast of Long Island. Art Gallery at Quogue Library, 90 Quogue Street, Quogue. SMALL WORKS, BIG GIFTS EXHIBIT & SALE Through 2/9, 11 a.m.–5 p.m. A special exhibit featuring 50+ framed photographic works 14” or smaller from 21 regional and national, award-winning photographers. Currently running at the Alex Ferrone Photography Gallery, 25425 Main Road at Alvah’s Lane, Cutchogue. 631-734-8545 alexferrone.com DOWNTON ABBEY STYLE IN SOUTHAMPTON Through 4/26. Styles and activities during Southampton’s Gilded Age occurred between 1880 and 1929 mirror the historical television drama Downton Abbey. The museum has a large collection of gowns donated by Southampton’s Summer Colony residents who were also members of high society in Manhattan. The exhibit documents the fashion, activities and lifestyle of the community that changed Southampton forever. Southampton Historical Museum, 17 Meeting House Lane, Southampton. 631-283-2494 southamptonhistoricalmuseum.org For more events and to list your event online, go to Events.DansPapers.com. Events submitted by noon to the online calendar will be considered for the print calendar.

Movies... The Legend Of Hercules The Legend Of Hercules looks to be a potent mixture of beefcake, violence, sex and half-baked mythology. Starring Kellen Lutz as Hercules, the strongest man in the world and, by virtue of the fact that Zeus is his father, a demigod. Now, if you were known to be the strongest man on Earth and a demigod, you might expect people to give you a wide berth. But poor Hercules is beset, seemingly from childhood, with a never-ending series of foes and tormentors who somehow get it into their heads that he is a pushover. It becomes his sorry fate to have to prove them wrong, over and over again, and it is sorry for the audiences of The Legend Of Hercules to watch him do so. The Adventurer: The Curse Of The Midas Box Just to answer the obvious question: this film has nothing to do with cheap, deficient mufflers. The film The Adventurer: The Curse Of The Midas Box is in fact set in England in the days before motorcars and mufflers, but not before the days of large, complicated machines. In fact, the film should be a steampunk’s delight. It seems that the Midas Box is a secret artifact held by a secret government agency, and it has the capability of bestowing untold wealth but also terrifying supernatural powers. The film was adapted from a popular teen novel, and is clearly

aimed at youthful viewers. The Great Flood In 1927 the Mississippi River flooded, laying waste to 27,000 square miles in the Deep South. What wasn’t heavily noted at the time, but what has since become the subject of heated debate, was the decision to open floodgates and sluices in order to direct the floodwaters away from white populations and toward black agricultural lands. The flood’s devastation, along with the Great Depression that followed starting in 1929, led to a transformation in American culture, as poor black farmers in the South migrated North to urban centers for better jobs. They brought with them music and foodways that shaped 20th-century life in ways that could not have been predicted. The Great Flood uses newsreel footage to show the ruin left by the flood: the newsreel footage, itself now badly decayed, echoes in its bubbly, water-like distortions the ravages of the original disaster. Banshee Chapter The horror film Banshee Chapter takes off from the (true) story that the CIA and other government agencies experimented with giving hallucinogenic drugs to volunteer civilians, with sometimes tragic results. From that the film derives a fairly run-of-themill “don’t look now” type of fright fest.

ua east hampton cinema 6 (+) (631-324-0448) 30 Main Street, East Hampton

ua southampton cinema (+) (631-287-2774) 43 Hill Street, Southampton

sag harbor cinema (+) (631-725-0010) 90 Main Street, Sag Harbor Closed Tuesday and Wednesday

ua hampton bays 5 (+) (631-728-8251) 119 West Montauk Highway, Hampton Bays

mattituck cinemas (631-298-SHOW) 10095 Main Road, Mattituck hampton arts (Westhampton beach) (+) (631-288-2600)

2 Brook Road, Westhampton Beach

Village cinema (greenport) (631-477-8600) 211 Front Street, Greenport Closed for the season.

montauk movie (631-668-2393) 3 Edgemere Road, Montauk Closed for the season.

The sign (+) when following the name of a theater indicates that a show has an infrared assistive listening device. Please confirm with the theater before arriving to make sure they are available.


DAN’S PAPERS

Page 32 January 10, 2014

danspapers.com

SHOP ‘TIL YOU DROP

GOODIES

Where to find the bargains this weekend.

For you, family and friends

Products to Keep Warm This Winter Season By stephanie de troy

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With the excitement of the holidays gradually slowing down, I thought I’d start off by taking a deep breath. As I was slowly exhaling, my sunglasses fogged up. Yup, it’s that time of year. We’re entering the season on the East End where many decide to head south. For those of us who brave it through the winter, myself included, I’ve gathered up some tips on staying warm as temperatures drop. To start with, nothing works better for me than going outside for a brisk walk. By the time you get back home, you can jump in the shower and follow with a good slathering of Dr. Haushcka’s Birch Arnica Body Oil. Specially formulated to revitalize after physical activity, the body oil gives all-around soothing warmth to the muscles and has a wonderful fragrance of energizing mint and lemon. The all-natural base of organic sunflower seed oil is lightweight, quickly absorbed and replenishes moisture. For an additional indulgence, give yourself a quick foot massage with the Rosemary Foot Balm and then slip on some cozy socks. The rosemary warms and invigorates the skin while silk powder and clay absorb and control moisture—keeping your feet soft, toasty and dry. Find these great winter warmers and the full line of Dr. Hauschka products online

at drhauschka.com or stop in to Second Nature Markets at either 70 Main Street in Southampton or at 41 Newtown Lane in East Hampton. Call 631-2838117 or 631-324-5257. It’s no secret that cold-weather countries love their vodka, so when all else fails to warm you up, gather your pals and try a top-shelf vodka like Marquis. When it comes to drinking it straight, mediocre vodka just won’t do. Premium, well-filtered vodka is what’s called for. One such vodka, which is new to the New York metro market but has been produced in Poland since 1895, is Marquis Vodka. Marquis has a nice bite without burning the palate. Be sure to take a whiff before drinking; the aroma is inviting rather than medicinal. Marquis farms its own rye in-house and produces its vodka at a small artisan distillery near Warsaw. Rather than industrial stills used for making many vodkas—the same kind of stills for manufacturing ethanol—Marquis is distilled in a century-old copper still. It is charcoal filtered four times before being cut with 60 percent water from Marquis’ own limestone aquifer. The vodka comes in a tall, thin, attractive bottle, making for a memorable hostess gift, or a statement piece for a liquor cabinet. Stop by your local liquor store or go online to marquisvodka.com. One way or another, odds are good that you’ll be spending a large part of the day indoors. Keep things interesting at home by diversifying your usual groceries and going on little taste-adventures. The good folks at Iberia sent me a bottle of their Premium Select 100% Extra Virgin Olive Oil from Spain with a

challenge: ‘taste for yourself—we think Spanish olive oil is as good as Italian.’ I agree. In fact, I didn’t even know there was a question. The Spanish have been pressing the golden elixir for centuries, right? Winter is also a good time to play with new makeup and beauty products. Why? Well, the heat won’t be melting it off and the dryness takes well to added moisture. I recently tried Intellishade SPF 45 Matte touted as a “breakthrough in pore-minimizing technology.” Right on. It’s light and moisturizing and does indeed “match every skin tone,” well it matched mine just fine. intellishadespf45.com Avid ShopTil readers may know I’m a bit of a health-nut-beauty junkie. My latest find is quite revolutionary, so listen up. L’dara Andvanced AntiAging Serum is free of parabens, mineral oils, phthalates or synthetic colors or fragrance and it really delivers. The breakthrough ingredients include a special complex derived from the magical goji berry. L’dara Serum helps reduce the visible effects of sun damage, boosts elasticity and retains moisture. It goes on clear and smooth and is completely non-irritating, even for my sensitive skin. Find yours at LdaraSerum.com. The monthly First Friday Shop Hop takes place this Friday, 1/10, 6–8 p.m. Look for the sign in windows and shop in support of your community! Participants include Bean 2 Tween, Besim’s Fine Cigars, Flying Point, Jill Lynn, Sea Green Designs, Sunrise to Sunset, and more! Bring your receipt for deals at Fellingham’s and Public House. For details, visit southamptonchamber.com or call 631-283-0402.

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danspapers.com

DAN’S PAPERS

January 10, 2014 Page 33

GARDEN

CALENDAR

What’s happening in our microclimate.

Events for families, kids and singles

Snowed In? Could be Good for Plants locations should be found for shrubs regularly piled on by the snow plows. Be sure to use plant (and animal) friendly chemicals and materials on walkways. Salt run-off soaks into soil and is defiantly not good for plants. We feed birds all year and our pond provides water for them. I filled both feeders before the storm and needed to fill them the day after. I think we are the neighborhood food center, as there are many birds of several varieties all winter. It is glorious to see cardinals sitting on the evergreens and their colors seem more intense in winter. I also put out cob corn for squirrels in the winter. I bought two big pumpkins in October for jack-olanterns. We just did not get around to carving them this year and I sat them “decoratively” in the house. This week I noticed that they were not in good shape at all. I split them open and put them under the bird feeders. The birds love them. They are eating the flesh as well as the seeds. While the plants in my garden hibernate under their mulch of leaves and snow, plant and seed catalogues arrive daily. I don’t mind the short cold days in winter, they remind me that spring is around the corner. Jeanelle Myers is a professional gardener, landscaper and consultant. For gardening discussion you can call her at 631-434-5067.

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When the snow stopped, I put on tall boots and tramped my way to the small pond in the side yard. There is a pump going in it all winter to keep an open hole in any ice that may form. Without an opening, gasses become trapped under the ice and the fish sleeping in the bottom may die. The pond and its surroundings were covered with a deep layer of snow. The snow was sitting on a net I had stretched over the pond in the fall to keep leaves out. The net kept the snow above the water about 3 inches, and the water was moving as freely as it does in the summer. Naturally fallen snow or blown snow is a great insulator. Because air is trapped between the flakes, it acts like mulch, protecting the ground and plants from cold winds and colder air. When leaves and dead stalks from the summer are left, they create mulch. Snow on top of that makes an even deeper layer of mulch, keeping plants snug even in intense cold. When fall temperatures signal trees and shrubs to drop their leaves and perennials to die back, their roots still need water. Long lasting spells of frozen ground can cause roots to dehydrate and die, weakening or killing the plant. Hence, the

advantage of mulch that traps air. I dug under the snow and the leaves in my beds to find the soil cold but loose. Deep snow on foundation plants may even protect them from snow falling from the roof as melting begins. When snow settles on branches of trees and shrubs and causes them to bend more than usual, we may be tempted to remove it. Most of the time Winter scene on the patio this is not necessary, as any sun will begin to melt it and branches may actually be harmed with the removal attempt. Any removal that is done, however, should be done when the snow is loose and then by gently shaking the branch, perhaps tapping with a broom, beginning at the tip of the branch. Trees and shrubs that open severely from snow need to be prepared for winter in the fall by tying or burlaping. You may need an arborist for this task. When the snow melts it, of course, provides water for roots. If the ground is protected with air-filled mulch, the water will be able to soak into the earth easily. There is snow that is not good for plants. When snow is piled on plants from plowing or shoveling, it loses its air and thus does not function as mulch. If these snow piles remain on plants for too long it can damage or even kill them. Be careful of branches if removing piles of snow from shrubs. Perhaps new

bigstock.com

By jeanelle myers


DAN’S PAPERS

Page 34 January 10, 2014

CALENDAR For more events happening this week, check out: Arts & Galleries Listings pg. 31 North Fork Calendar pg. 34, Kids’ Calendar pg. 36

thursday, january 9 AARP DEFENSIVE DRIVING COURSE 11:30 a.m.–3:30 p.m. Registration required; $20 for AARP members/$25 for non-members. Payment by check or money order only, made out to AARP. Bring bag lunch. Hampton Library, 2478 Main Street, Bridgehampton. hamptonlibrary.org ESL FOR BEGINNERS 6–7 p.m. Every Thursday. Join instructor Lisa Del Favero for this basic English class. The Hampton Library, 2478 Main Street, Bridgehampton. 631-537-0015 hamptonlibrary.org CHEFFE COLETTE CONNOR OF THE INN SPOT ON THE BAY 6–8 p.m. Make a series of soups with Cheffe Colette. Be prepared for a new twist on tomato soup and grilled cheese. $15, registration required. Quogue Library, 90 Quogue Street, Quogue. 631-653-4224 ext. 101 “HEROES” AT HAMPTON THEATRE COMPANY 7 p.m. Through 1/26. Tom Stoppard’s Olivier Awardwinning play about World War I vets planning their escape from an old soldiers home. Tickets $10–$25. Quogue Community Hall, 125 Jessup Avenue, Quogue. 631-653-6614 hamptontheatre.org “SEX, WHAT SHE’S REALLY THINKING” 7:30 p.m. Through 1/26. Comedic play about the thoughts women have about sexual subjects. Adult themes. Southampton Cultural Center, 25 Pond Lane, Southampton. 631-287-4377 scc-arts.org THE JAM SESSION AT BAY BURGER 7–9 p.m. Thursdays. The Jam Session & The Thursday Night Live Band. Bay Burger, 1742 Sag Harbor Turnpike, Sag Harbor. No cover charge. 631-899-3915 thejamsession.org STEVE FREDERICKS AT MUSE IN THE HARBOR 7–10 p.m. Thursdays. Steve Fredericks will perform every Thursday, no cover. 16 Main Street, Sag Harbor. 631-899-4810 museintheharbor.com LADIES NIGHT AT AGAVE’S TEQUILA AND RUM BAR 8:30 p.m. Thursdays. Ladies Night is all night, with DJ. 142 Mill Road, Westhampton Beach. 631-998-4200 agaveswhb.com KARAOKE AT GURNEY’S 9:30 p.m. Thursdays, with Helen of The Diva’s Karaoke. Gurney’s Inn Resort Spa and Conference Center, 290 Old Montauk Hwy, Montauk. 631-668-2345, gurneysinn.com.

friday, january 10 THE 50/50 FITNESS EXPERIENCE WITH OSCAR GONZALEZ 9:30–10:30 a.m. Zumba and Total Body Conditioning

DR. NANCY COSENZA DENTISTRY

FOR CHILDREN TEENS & HANDICAPPED

631-287-TOTS Hampton Pediatric Dental Associates specializes in general dental care for young people. We believe that good dental habits started at a young age will last a lifetime. Our office is designed to make children (& their parents) feel comfortable in a situation that many adults choose to avoid! Our hours will accommodate even the most hectic schedule. 1045403 31456

combined into one unique and effective class. $20 or call for 10-class promotion. Dance Centre of the Hamptons, 10 Mitchell Lane, Westhampton Beach. 203-536-1159 zumbafitnesshamptons.com HAPPY HOUR AT SOUTHAMPTON PUBLICK HOUSE 4 p.m.–midnight. Party all night with DJ Dory at 10 p.m. 40 Bowden Square, Southampton. 631-283-2800 publick.com CANDLELIGHT FRIDAYS AT WöLFFER ESTATE VINEYARD 5 p.m. Wines are served by the glass or bottle and cheese and charcuterie plates are available for purchase. There is no cover charge or reservations necessary. 139 Sagg Road, Sagaponack. 631-537-5106 wolffer.com NANCY ATLAS & ANDY ALEDORT AT BAY STREET 8 p.m. New series featuring Nancy Atlas and a new gueststar each week. $15. Bay Street Theatre, Corner of Bay and Main Streets, Sag Harbor. 631-725-9500 baystreet.org HARRY-OKE FRIDAYS AT LIARS’ CLUB 10 p.m. Fridays. 401 W. Lake Drive, Montauk. 631-668-9597 KARAOKE AT MJ DOWLING’S STEAK HOUSE AND TAVERN 10:30 p.m.–1:30 a.m., Friday night karaoke. MJ Dowling’s, 3360 Noyak Rd., Sag Harbor. 631-725-4444

saturday, january 11 ZUMBA IN THE HAMPTONS WITH OSCAR GONZALEZ 9 a.m.–10 a.m. Burn calories with Oscar and leave sweating and smiling. The Dance Centre of the Hamptons, 10 Mitchell Place, Westhampton Beach. 203-536-1159 zumba-oscar.com HOW TO ID TREES IN WINTER WITH SOFO 10–11 a.m. Learn to identify trees without leaves. Dress warmly. Free for SoFo members; $7 for non-members/$5 for kids 3–12/free for kids under 2. Round Pond, East Hampton. Call for exact location. 631-537-9735 sofo.org BOATER SAFETY COURSE TAUGHT BY RICH KING OF U.S. COAST GUARD AUXILIARY 10 a.m.–6 p.m. Topics covered will include safety equipment, navigation, weather, use of radio and dock procedures. Seating is limited, $20 per person. Quogue Library, 90 Quogue Street, Quogue. 631-653-4224 ext. 101 FAMILY TO FAMILY NAMI CLASSES ON MENTAL ILLNESS 11 a.m.–5 p.m. Class will help families learn how to help mentally ill family members and relatives. Free; 18 and older. East Hampton High School, Long Lane, East Hampton. 631-725-4342 PIGSKIN SATURDAYS AT TOWNLINE BBQ Noon–9 p.m. Saturdays through 1/25. Special smoked pig menu from Livingston Manor to coincide with football games. Townline BBQ, 3593 Townline Road, Sagaponack. 631-537-2271 townlinebbq.com TASTINGS AT THE MONTAUK BREWING COMPANY Noon–7 p.m. Saturdays & Sundays; 3–7 p.m., Friday. 62 S. Erie Ave, Montauk. 631-834-2627 montaukbrewingco.com

danspapers.com

OPICK OF THE WEEK FRIDAY, JANUARY 10

Nancy Atlas & Andy Aledort 8 p.m. (See below) Guild Hall, 158 Main Street, East Hampton. 631-324-0806 guildhall.org AUDITIONS FOR “THE FOREIGNER” 6–8 p.m. Also 1/13. The Hampton Theatre Company holds open auditions for The Foreigner by Larry Shue. Readings will be from script, no monologue or appointment necessary. Quogue Community Hall, 125 Jessup Avenue, Quogue. 631-726-4656 hamptontheatre.org

monday, january 13 HAMPTONS WELLNESS WEEK 8 a.m. A celebration of health and wellness hosted by One Healthy Hamptons consisting of $5 fitness classes throughout the East End. Sign up at Hampton Coffee Southampton Experience, 749 County Road 39A, Southampton. hamptonswellnessweek.com NEWPLICATE BRIDGE GAME WATER MILL BRIDGE CLUB 10 a.m.–1 p.m. Every Monday. Players with little or no experience are welcome to join this introduction to bridge. Teacher Susan Denenholz teaches players as the game goes along. Water Mill Bridge Club, 1040 Montauk Highway, Water Mill. 631-726-6448 bridgeinthehamptons.com KNITTING GROUP AT JOHN JERMAIN 1 p.m. Yarn donations are always appreciated. John Jermain Library, 34 West Water Street, Sag Harbor. 631-725-0049 ext. 230 johnjermain.org MONDAY NIGHT DANCE CLASS 5:45–6:45 p.m. Light-hearted, full-bodied dance class offered on a donation basis by Jamie Lerner. Different music/dance styles each week. The Body Shop, 26 Newtown Lane above Eileen Fisher (enter through back), East Hampton. 631-604-1462 jamielerner.com

tuesday, january 14 ZUMBA AT QUOGUE LIBRARY 6:30–7:30 p.m. Get fit and raise your fitness level while having fun. Wear comfortable clothing. $5 per session. Call to register. Quogue Library, 90 Quogue Street, Quogue. 631-653-4224 ext. 101

wednesday, january 15 LADIES NIGHT AT SOUTHAMPTON PUBLICK HOUSE 9:30 p.m. DJ Tony spins Hamptons classics. 40 Bowden Square, Southampton. 631-283-2800 publick.com

thursday, january 16

sunday, january 12

FULL “WOLF MOON” HIKE 7–8 p.m. Legend has it that native tribes related this moon to howling of wolves. Leisurely paced hike through openfield trails and enjoy hot cider and donuts afterward. Cosponsored by Friends of the Long Pond Greenbelt and South Fork Natural History Museum. Call to register and for exact location. 631-537-9735 longpondgreenbelt.org

SOUTHAMPTON ANIMAL SHELTER MOBILE SPRAY/ NEUTER LOW-COST CLINIC 7 a.m.–5 p.m. By appointment only. 101 Old Riverhead Road West, Hampton Bays. 631-728-7387 southamptonanimalshelter.com

THE JAM SESSION AT BAY BURGER 7–9 p.m. Thursdays. The Jam Session & The Thursday Night Live Band. Bay Burger, 1742 Sag Harbor Turnpike, Sag Harbor. No cover charge. 631-899-3915 thejamsession.org

ADULT TENNIS PROGRAMS AT FUTURE STARS SOUTHAMPTON 7 a.m.–8 p.m. Tennis programs for all levels, including clinics, private sessions, seasonal court rentals and hourly rentals. Mornings or afternoons. Future Stars Southampton, 1370A Majors Path, Southampton. 631-287-6707 futurestarssouthampton.com

friday, january 17

SATURDAYS AT SOUTHAMPTON PUBLICK HOUSE 10 p.m., DJ Brian Evans spins Hamptons classics every Saturday in the taproom. 40 Bowden Square, Southampton. 631-283-2800 publick.com

TABLE TALK: A PRIMER ON WINE & SPIRITS WITH MICHAEL CINQUE 11 a.m.–12:30 p.m. Meet, mingle, munch and learn about wine and spirits with Michael Cinque, owner of Amagansett Wines and Spirits. Free, $10 donation appreciated.

FIRESIDE SESSION WITH NANCY ATLAS & DANNY KEANE 8 p.m. Series featuring Nancy Atlas and a new gueststar each week. $15. Bay Street Theatre, Corner of Bay and Main Streets, Sag Harbor. 631-725-9500 baystreet.org For more events and to list your event online, go to Events. DansPapers.com. Events submitted by noon to the online calendar will be considered for the print calendar.


DAN’S PAPERS

danspapers.com

January 10, 2014 Page 35

Triangle Building Products Corp. 2599 Route 112 Medford, NY 11763 631-654-3500 www.trianglebp.com

31426

Creating New Traditions


DAN’S PAPERS

Page 36 January 10, 2014

KIDS’ CALENDAR For more events happening this week, check out: North Fork Calendar pg. 27, Arts & Galleries Listings pg. 31, Calendar pg. 34

thursday, january 9 MORNING STORYTIME AT THE QUOGUE LIBRARY 11 a.m. For little ones 1–3 years old. Special stories with Miss Pat. Register by phone. Quogue Library, 90 Quogue Street, Quogue. 631-653-4224 ext. 4 quoguelibrary.org LEGO MANIA 3:30–4:30 p.m. Create anything you like with Legos at the library! This is a great chance for parents to relax and socialize, too. Hampton Library, 2478 Main Street, Bridgehampton. 631-537-0015 hamptonlibrary.org LEGOS AND GAMES 4–5 p.m. For Kids K-up! Build with Legos; play board games and hopsctoch; Hula Hoop; Rubber band jump-rope and more. Also seeking 6th graders to be play-partners and earn community service hours. Amagansett Free Library, 215 Main Street, Amagansett. 631-267-3810 amaglibrary.org

friday, january 10 2ND ANNUAL VIDEO GAME TOURNAMENT 7–10 p.m. Southampton Youth Bureau hosts its annual game tournament. Play games like Just Dance 4, Super Smash Bros. Brawl, Mario Kart and more. 5th–12th grade. The Drop Spot, 655 Flanders Road, Flanders. $5 includes food and drinks. Bus will be available for students coming from Hampton Bays High School at 6:40 p.m. 631-702-2421 southamptontownny.gov/youthbureau SHAKE, RATTLE & ROLL 10 a.m. Fridays. Amagansett Free Library, 215 Main Street, Amagansett. Parents/caregivers with toddlers 10–36 months olds are invited to join us for an hour of interactive play. 631-267-3810 amaglibrary.org

SHARK DIVE 11 a.m. Daily, ages 12 and up (12–17 must be accompanied by a parent). Long Island Aquarium and Exhibition Center, 431 East Main Street, Riverhead. The aquarium puts you into a cage in the middle of more than 10 circling sharks! No diving certification necessary. $155/nonmembers, $140/ members (includes aquarium admission). 631-208-9200 longislandaquarium.com MINECRAFT MADNESS 4 p.m. For fans of the hit game Minecraft. Westhampton Free Library, 7 Library Avenue, Westhampton Beach. 631-288-3335 RAINBOW LOOM CLUB 7 p.m. Make and trade your own rainbow bracelets. Westhampton Free Library, 7 Library Avenue, Westhampton Beach. 631-288-3335

saturday, january 11 ANIMAL FEEDING TIME AT SOFO: FOR CHILDREN OF ALL AGES 10–11 a.m. Kids will feed animals and learn about animals’ diets and feeding strategies. South Fork History Museum; call for exact location. Free for members; $7 for nonmembers, $5 for children 3–12, free for children 2 and under. 631-537-9735 sofo.org CMEE PLAY! CHICKEN BURRITOS 10:30–11:30 a.m. Chef Alan teaches kids to build their own chicken burritos and make fresh salsa and guacamole. For ages 2–6. $15 for members/$25 for non-members. Children’s Museum of the East End, 376 Bridgehampton Turnpike, Bridgehampton. 631-537-8250 cmee.org

sunday, january 12 SUNDAY STORY TIME 1:30 p.m. East Hampton Library, 159 Main Street, East Hampton. Open up your child’s mind with stories from our picture book collections. Ages 3–plus. 631-324-0222 easthamptonlibrary.com SUNDAY GAMES 3:30­ –4:30 p.m. Sundays. John Jermain Library. 34 West Water Street, Sag Harbor. Get away from TV screens

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and challenge your friends or family to a friendly board game competition. The library will provide a variety of games including Chutes & Ladders, Candyland, Apples to Apples and others. Ages 3–9. 631-725-0049 johnjermain.org

monday, january 13 MONDAY STORYTIMES AT MONTAUK LIBRARY 11:45 a.m., Listen to stories, sing songs and make a craft! All are welcome to listen. The crafts are most appropriate for preschool age children. 871 Montauk Highway, Montauk. 631-668-3377 montauklibrary.org FLASH STORY TIME AND CRAFT 2:15 p.m.–2:45 p.m. Super-fast and super-fun with books and a simple craft. Great for children nursery school-PreK. Amagansett Free Library, 215 Main Street, Amagansett. 631-267-3810 ALATEEN 4–5 p.m. John Jermain Library. 34 West Water Street, Sag Harbor. Alateen is a chance for young people affected by someone else’s problem drinking to share their experiences and discuss effective ways to cope in a safe and anonymous setting. Light snacks will be served. 631-786-0368/631-793-0074 johnjermain.org

tuesday, january 14 WALDORF-INSPIRED NURSERY CLASSES AGES 2.5–3.5 9 a.m–noon The nursery program provides a nurturing staff in a beautiful and calm environment, suited for the child’s development. Our Sons and Daughters School, 11 Carroll Street, Sag Harbor. oursonsanddaughters.org FIRST STORY TIME Tuesdays, 10:15–11 a.m. For caregivers and their tots through 4 years old. Stories, flannel boards, puppets, songs and fun. A perfect introduction to story time for young children. Amagansett Free Library, 215 Main Street, Amagansett. 631-267-3810 amaglibrary.org

For more events and to list your event online, go to Events.DansPapers.com. Events submitted by noon on Friday will be considered for the print calendar.

LETTERS TO THE EDITOR THE REAL STORY Dear Dan, I read with interest your article in the Nov 1, 2013 edition of Dan’s Papers. (“Hold Them Responsible: Government Shutdown Lessons,” page 18) I grew up in the city and now live on the East End. I have lived for extended periods in Houston, Boston and Frankfurt, Germany and have had a chance to hear a wide range of views. Your paper was known in many of those places. It’s because of that wide readership that I wish to lodge my disagreement with your position. For the record, I believe that both political parties are equally reprehensible and fundamentally disingenuous. There’s likely little to debate that the shutdown was damaging to the country. That Obamacare has been made the law of the land is also true. It was a close-run battle and there were many, many inducements to legislators to get them to sign onto it. Even the polarizing speaker had said: “We need to vote for this bill so we can get to read what’s in it.”... As I recall during the news reports of the shutdown, it was the governing regime’s position that they would not negotiate, they wanted all of their demands or nothing. They practiced brinkmanship in the face of bipartisan attempts to reopen essential parts of the government...One statement you made is that the president is our commander-in-chief. You are wrong, flatly and dangerously wrong there. I’m not in the military and the rank of commander-in-chief is typically considered a wartime rank. The oval office has no authority over me outside of the Constitution, nor does the oval office have unrelenting authority

over the military. The occupant of the Oval Office is a public servant; where there’s a dispute between the delegated orders and the execution of those orders by the executive, then the judicial branch is supposed to act as the disinterested arbiter to settle the dispute. The system of checks and balances was arranged to prevent a run-away government, or a rogue administration, from steamrolling their agenda throughout the country. So these procedural issues you decry as derailing the execution of government were in fact designed into the system to keep things in balance...To want things to be otherwise is to call for a dictatorship. Near the end of your article, you suggest that the administration should go to Congress and press for laws to prevent this sort of government shutdown from happening again. Are you really calling for laws to prevent Congress from doing the duty they were elected to do: monitoring the interests of the American people they were selected to represent? But your closing comment is stunning. That the administration should go to the courts to hold people accountable. Do you really and honestly mean that? One thing that’s really amazing about your article is its apparent support of Obamacare. It was written after the launch of Obamacare and the utter, total and inexcusable failure of Obamacre to deliver on any of its promises: The ability to keep your current policy, the ability to see your current doctors, no increase in your premiums. Workers’ hours are being cut to avoid providing them insurance coverage. Even the Supreme Court played games by taking a position that was never entered into evidence, that

the penalty was actually a tax [thereby breaking] with all legal precedent of judicial process... Healthcare is a large portion of the American economy. We’ve gone to war for less money than this. When will they start waterboarding shirkers for not telling the truth? Let’s project ahead a little bit to a time when Obamacare is the operating system of healthcare in the land. Yet your attending physician can’t get an answer from his physician’s provider connection on the network to decide if you or a loved one can have a particular procedure, and for want of that answer from on high, you or your loved one die. Think that’s far fetched? Look at the record in the UK National Health Service or any other large, national health care provider for a heterogeneous population. Delays in answers cost lives. Responsive government is local government. Finally, I’ve been a consultant for some of the largest pension systems in this country. I tell you flatly that Obamacare cannot work. That’s a mathematical certainty based on the numbers and a large, diverse population group. It would be great to live in a country where everyone had access to healthcare and where one chronic illness would not financially devastate the hard work and savings of a lifetime. But Obamacare is not the way to do it. —Joseph J. OByrne, The Due Diligence Company, Greenport With all that said, you don’t shut down the government.—DR Email your letters to askdan@danspapers.com


DAN’S PAPERS

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January 10, 2014 Page 37

SIMPLE ART

SIDE DISH

See what’s cooking now.

Where to save while dining out

By brendan j. o’reilly

T

Lena Tanzi

wo North Fork sisters have combined their talents in Southold to open a new breakfast and lunch spot, Wednesday’s Table, which welcomed its first customers December 1. “What we wanted to bring to the North Fork was some diversity in food that we felt was missing, in a more casual environment,” co-owner and manager Lena Tanzi says. Her sister, Linh Trieu, is the co-owner and chef of this counter service restaurant, which Tanzi says is an alternative to the fork’s many formal dining restaurants. Trieu has worked in restaurants and cooking for 10 years, and wanted to go off and have a business on her own, Tanzi explains. They also decided to

forgo dinner and strictly serve breakfast and lunch only, so they could have a life outside of Wednesday’s Table. Tanzi, who splits her time between Peconic and Brooklyn, worked in financial services for 17 years, and now she runs the business side of Wednesday’s Table. Ironically, Wednesday is the only day of the week when their restaurant is closed. “There is a story behind the name,” Tanzi says. “It’s called Wednesday’s Table in tribute to our father.” They grew up as part of an immigrant family and their father, Phil Trieu, who has since passed on, worked multiple jobs and very long hours. “He had Wednesdays off. We think of Wednesdays as our family time,” Tanzi says. Wednesday’s Table focuses on specialty sandwiches and salads, with a variety of influences. Among the sandwiches on the menu are a Greek gyro, eggplant caprese melt, mushroom truffled grilled cheese and Vietnamese bánh mì. The salads have fun names, like My Big Fat Greek Salad, South by Southwest Salad, and Crouching Tiger, Hidden Salad. In the morning, pick up a breakfast sandwich or authentic New York bagel. Wednesday’s Table

Lena Tanzi

New Breakfast, Lunch Spot Opens in Southold

also serves soups and sweets, plus organic coffee and tea. Take-out is a large part of the business, but there are six tables and 16 to 20 seats available for staying and enjoying food. “In the summertime we will have some outdoor seating; in the wintertime we have a screened in porch room,” Tanzi says. Wednesday’s Table is located at 53345 Main Road, Southold, open six days a week (closed Wednesdays) from 7 a.m. to 4 p.m. Call 631-876-5251. Visit wednesdays-table.com for the full menu.

— ope n 7 days —

COME IN FROM THE COLD! W I NT E R R E ST A U R A NT H O U R S Dinner: Sun - Thurs from 5:30-9pm Fri - Sat from 5:30-10:30pm Lunch: Mon - Fri from 12-2pm Breakfast: Daily from 7-10:30am Brunch: Sat - Sun from 10:30am - 2:30pm

PRIX FIXE $25

sunday to th ur sday 5 to 7 open days we dne7sday al l n i g h t — ope n 7 days — monday

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Page 38 January 10, 2014

food & dining

danspapers.com

Getting to the Root of Our Healthy Resolutions By this time, you’re resolved to eat right in 2014. Root vegetables like carrots, parsnips, leek and turnips, which are at their peak at this time of the year, make prefect candidates for winter dishes, releasing rich sweet flavors as they simmer for a pureed soup, or an oven roast vegetable side. The puréed root vegetable soup containing butternut squash is brought up to the moment with chicken broth and a garnish of reconstituted earthy porcini mushrooms. And a winter slow roast of vegetables is a colorful supporting player to a hearty entrée. In addition to their natural sweetness, root vegetables are high in nutrients, daily fiber and a range of cancer-fighting substances called phytochemicals. No guilt trip here when preparing any of the above. ROOT VEGETABLE SOUP WITH DRIED MUSHROOM GARNISH Dried porcini mushrooms are usually sandy. It is necessary to soak them in water to release the sand. Serves 6 to 8 1 butternut squash, about 2 to 3 pounds 2 large parsnips 2 leeks 2 ribs celery 2 cloves garlic, finely chopped 1 1/2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil 1 1/2 tablespoons unsalted butter

Kosher salt and freshly ground pepper 5 1/2 cups chicken stock or low sodium canned broth 1/2 cup heavy cream For the mushroom garnish 1 ounce dried porcini mushroom Drained mushroom liquid 1. Place squash in microwave oven for 2 minutes on high for easier cutting. Lay the squash on its side and cut thick slices. Cut away and discard the shell then cut into cubes. Peel turnips and cut into cubes. Trim leeks, discard any bruised outer layers, then wash very well between the layers. If leeks are very sandy, let them soak in a bowl of cold water. Cut through the layers away from the root end then slice thin. Trim celery and wash well. Cut into thin slices. Chop the garlic. 2. Heat oil and butter in a large, 5-quart saucepan. When butter melts and foam subsides, add all the vegetables to the pan. Toss to coat in butter and oil. Season with salt and pepper to taste. Cover vegetables with a square of wax paper to sweat them, then cover pan and simmer on the lowest possible heat for 6–7 minutes. Discard wax paper and pour the broth over the vegetables. Simmer the soup over medium heat for 25–30 minutes, with cover ajar. 3. Meanwhile, soak the dried mushrooms in a small bowl with warm water to cover. Let stand about 5 minutes and lift the mushrooms into a second small bowl. Drain the liquid through a fine sieve into a third bowl. Return mushrooms to the liquid to soak again, and then drain again to be sure the liquid no longer contains any sand. 4. When the vegetables are very tender, puree the soup in a blender or with a hand-immersion blender. Add the drained porcini liquid and the cream to the

soup and stir to mix. Taste to adjust seasoning if necessary. Reheat before serving garnished with thin slices of the dehydrated porcini mushrooms. ROASTED ROOT VEGETABLES Turnips, celery knob, parsnip and carrots make a colorful arrangement. When the garlic is cooked, the clove, squeezed from its skin, is pleasantly sweet. Serves 8 to 10 2 white turnips 3 parsnips 1 bunch carrots 1 celery knob Several whole garlic cloves, unpeeled 1/2 cup extra-virgin olive oil 2 to 3 teaspoons kosher salt Freshly ground pepper 2 tablespoons fresh thyme leaves 2 to 3 tablespoons balsamic vinegar Preheat oven to 375°F. 1. Peel and trim the vegetables and cut them into chunky pieces of equal size. To remove the gnarled skin of the celery knob, cut along the sides with a sharp knife. 2. Spread the vegetables in a heavy roasting pan. Toss in the garlic cloves, olive oil, salt, pepper and thyme and toss again to coat the vegetables. The vegetables can be prepped overnight. 3. Cover vegetables with foil, shiny side down and place in preheated oven. Roast covered for 45 minutes. Remove foil, sprinkle vegetables with the balsamic vinegar and give the vegetables a toss. Continue to roast, uncovered, for 35 to 45 minutes longer or until vegetables are tender and crusty. Serve warm or at room temperature.

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food & dining

danspapers.com

January 10, 2014 Page 39

Musing at North Fresno Inn? By aji jones

Fresno in East Hampton offers two- and three-course prix fixe menus Sundays through Thursdays 5:30 p.m. to close, and on Fridays and Saturdays 5:30 to 6:30 p.m. (Fresno is closed Mondays and Tuesdays.) The two-course menu of an appetizer and entrée is $30 per person and the three-course menu is $35, plus tax and gratuity. Items include white bean and garlic hummus with grilled pita and olives, and fettuccini with shrimp, asparagus, zucchini, oven-cured tomatoes, garlic and basil. 631-324-8700 North Fork Table and Inn in Southold is hosting cooking sessions with Chefs Gerry Hayden and Kevin Penner every Saturday in January. Classes begin at 1 p.m. and will be one to two hours in length with one rule: local ingredients only. Cost is $90 per session or $300 for the month. Jan. 11 features Stephanie Gaylor of Invincible Summer Farms; Jan. 18 features Tom Geppel of 8 Hands Farm; and Jan. 25 features Phil Mastrangelo of Race Rock Oysters. 631-765-0177 Meeting House in Amagansett offers a two-course prix fixe with a cocktail on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays and Sundays 5 to 9 p.m. The $25 prix fixe features a variety of appetizers including artichoke, soup of the day and roasted beets with ricotta salata as well as a choice of main courses, such as spaghetti carbonara, orecchiette with smoked

chicken, escarole, white beans, thyme and fresh ricotta and wholewheat linguine with clams, onions and Romano. 631-267-2764 Muse in the Harbor in Sag Harbor offers a threecourse prix fixe dinner all night on Thursdays and Sundays, and from 5:30 to 6:30 p.m. on Fridays and Saturdays. Starting at $30, the prix fixe menu may include scallop mac-n-cheese, pulled pork pancake and Asian chile glazed blowfish. Entrées may include blackened sashimi-style ahi tuna, flounder schnitzel, and Long Island Duck au poivre. Desserts may feature cheesecake chimichangas and Grandma G’s zeppole. 631-899-4810 Buckley’s Inn Between in Hampton Bays offers nightly specials throughout the week. Diners can build their own burgers and enjoy two-for-one wings on Mondays. Tuesday offers two full entrées for $23.95. Wednesday features a three-course prix fixe for $19.95. Thursday is Steak Night with all the wings diners can eat for $15 from 10 p.m. to 1 a.m. Friday features a variety of drink specials, DJ Disco Pauley plays on Saturday. Sunday features two-forone appetizers at the bar all day long. 631-728-7197 Gurney’s Inn in Montauk offers a three-course prix fixe dinner for $25.95 at its Sea Grille, served from 5:30 to 6:30 p.m. every night. Choice of appetizers includes coconut shrimp roll with sweet, Thai chile sauce and Asian vegetable wholewheat pot stickers with sesame garlic sauce. Entrées vary from fish di giorno, to chicken Frances, to gnocchi alla Romano featuring tender filet mignon tips sautéed with sundried tomatoes, sliced mushrooms and fresh asparagus. 631-668-2345

The BesT Prix Fixe in The hamPTons 3 Course $2700 Sun - Thurs All Night

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Page 40 January 10, 2014

food & dining

danspapers.com

Scarola Vineyards in Mattituck a Masseria

Home for the Holidays” takes on new meaning at Cedar House on Sound Bed and Breakfast in Mattituck, owned by Frank and Donna Scarola and cousins David and Donna Perrin. Its not just home to their family and their boutique winery, its can be home for your family, too. Right now, their great room displays a hand-built nativity scene that David Perrin begins constructing months before. It features miniature vignettes that reflect the holiday spirit. There’s a glassblower, a baker, a fisherman and vineyards, as well as a lovingly crafted crèche. Five spacious bedrooms and expansive views make it a cozy place for a winter getaway, a unique opportunity to relax and sample the family’s wine and hospitality. With the strong Italian tradition of the family “masseria” (farmstead) informing his dreams, Scarola built a career designing and implementing software for financial institutions such as JP Morgan and Morgan Stanley, but longed to return to the land. “My parents were farmers,” Scarola says. “The stories resonated...I thought ‘let me create this ideal lifestyle here’. It started with the wine.” Although Scarola learned to make wine when he was a child, the story of the winery officially begins about 10 years ago, when he met Roman Roth of Wölffer Estate Vineyard at an event. “He had been voted best wine maker out here and I approached him as a stranger and asked about producing my wine.” A wonderful collaboration ensued, and rather than downscaling his current profession, he forged a new lifestyle commuting from his home in Garden City and job in Manhattan to the Island while developing the Scarola label with grapes he purchased from other growers.

But dreams have a way of taking hold of the imagination and expanding and Scarola recognized an opportunity to more fully embrace his vision. “I came across this property one day—an old potato packing barn...there was no flooring, no plumbing... It was in disarray,” he says, “but it had potential...I was overwhelmed with its size... and what was here...” He started work on the conversion, but ran out of steam. Enter David Perrin, whose wife, Donna is Frank’s cousin— not to be confused with “Tia” Donna, Frank’s wife. The Perrins lived in Florida and were removed from the “family scene” as Scarola puts it. Both were in the wine and hospitality business, traveled extensively and had a young daughter. As families do, another cousin suggested Scarola call Donna, that “they might be ready for a change.” Perrin remembers the moment succinctly. He was in the car, driving. “It was October 2009 and my wife called and said ‘remember my cousin Frank... here’s the thing...’” Have a glass! The Perrins knew nothing about the East End but were duly impressed. They came for Thanksgiving, traveled the North Fork, and went back to Florida to put their house up for sale. They were Long Island residents by March 2010 and finished construction of Cedar House B&B that summer. Scarola believes that farming runs deep. “David’s

parents were vegetable farmers in upstate New York. His dad has been with the NY State Farm bureau for many years. We both started with those roots, and came back to it.” Even Donna [Perrin], who grew up in Queens, has a background in agricultural. “Her dad turned the corner lot into a garden,” says Scarola. The year 2011 was big for the cousins. They planted their vineyard Memorial Day Weekend and launched the website. “We have amended the soil and try to be as organic as possible: sustainable gardening,” says Perrin. “We live there. We are not going to contaminate the area our children play in.” They currently sell their wine through the website and have poured at major East End events such as Taste of Two Forks and Harvest East End. Tastings are by appointment only in their rustic tasting room that overlooks the vineyard with3 the hand-hewn bar and harvest table. “We are #1 out of 38 B&B’s on Trip Advisor,” grins Perrin. “We are a destination: a place to stay, a vineyard experience— agro-tourism on the East End. We want to create an environment where people look forward to coming to sit and enjoy.” Courtesy Scarola Vineyards

By debbie slevin

Scarola Vineyards is located at 4850 Sound Avenue, Mattituck. For more information, visit scarolavineyards.com or call 631-298-7676.

“Local” Irish and Italian Cookbooks By stacy dermont

2

013 was a great year for cookbooks. As we Americans get “foodier,” the cookbooks just keep comin’ and East Enders are putting out their fair share. This is a splendid time of year to try some new recipes—especially if it heats up the whole house! Hands down 2013’s most beautiful East End cookbook is Earthguide to Wellbeing by Maggie Harrsen and Good Water Farms. This East Hampton farm is all about organic microgreens and this book is all about celebrating the health-giving power of eating microgreens. The photographs and recipes are equally arresting and simple. Maggieharrsen.com

This is a good story to read aloud to children—and then put them to work in the kitchen! A favorite for all ages. Ambassador International released Christmas Flavors of Ireland, Celebrating the Festive Season. It’s local cookbook author Margaret M. Johnson’s 10th release—earlier titles include The Irish Pub Cookbook and The New Irish Table. Johnson lives in Westhampton Beach and often travels to her ancestral home in Ireland. In fact, 2014 will mark 20 years of Johnson’s sojourns to the motherland. Her next cookbook, Favorite Flavors of Ireland, will be something of a retrospective of her previous books. I chatted with Johnson about Christmas Flavors, she suggested that her recipes for Christmas pudding and gingerbread bars are particularly good choices

to make with children (in the kitchen, not in the batter). Her Christmas pudding happens to be her favorite holiday recipe and it involves a lot of easy measuring of ingredients—kids love to help with that. Don’t limit your consumption of this treat to the holiday season. Her gingerbread bars with cream cheese frosting are a favorite for all ages. The La Parmigiana Cookbook (Peconic Bay Consulting) is big and straightforward, like the Southampton eatery it’s named after. The Gambino family pictured on its cover looks oddly uncomfortable, but don’t let that stop you from taking a peek inside. The recipes are no-nonsense and they use a lot of good, canned tomatoes. Italian-American cuisine is hot right now—so this book could be a hip hostess gift stuffed in a basket with a load of goodies from La Parm’s deli on Hampton Road. My favorite part of this cookbook was its lengthy introduction, which tells the story of Gambino patriarch Celestino AKA “Papa.” He was tough but fair, a hardworking man who is very much missed by his family and community. This is a good story to read aloud to young children— and then put them to work in the kitchen! Written by Phil Keith and the Gambino family with photographs by Lindsay Morris. An old local favorite, now in print And last but never least, it ain’t local, it’s not even a book—but it’s fabu: Meredith launched I heart that little marshmallow-headed guy and will the new magazine, allrecipes, last month. The make him for my young (and young-at-heart) friends’ premiere issue had me at melted snowman cookie. delight throughout the winter months.


food & dining

danspapers.com

January 10, 2014 Page 41

A Guide to Local Favorites 75 MAIN RESTAURANT AND LOUNGE Italian/American $$$ Executive chef Mark Militello. Open daily, 8 a.m.–4:30 p.m. Dinner 4:30 p.m.–midnight, 75 Main Street, Southampton. 631-283-7575, 75main.com.

MJ Dowling’s Steak House and Tavern American $$ Great selection of American Fare in a friendly Pub atmosphere. Draft Beers. Family owned and operated. Game room—0Pool Table. 3360 Noyac Road, Sag Harbor. 631-725-4444

NAMMOS Greek $$$ Authentic Greek Cuisine. Open 7 Daily, Fresh fish flown in daily. Featuring 2010 Greece’s Chef of the year Emmanouil Aslanoglou. Prix Fixe All Day four courses $34. Reservations. 136 Main Street, Southampton 631-287-5500.

east hampton RACE LANE Local Cuisine $$$ New menu! Join us by the fireplace for some cheese, charcuterie and wine. Serving dinner nightly from 5 p.m. 31 Race Lane, East Hampton. Three-course Prix fixe, $33 until 7 p.m. Fridays and Saturdays at 6 p.m. 31 Race Lane, East Hampton. 631-324-5022, racelanerestaurant.com.

bridgehampton and sag harbor BOBBY VAN’S Steak and Fish $$$ Steakhouse classics and fresh fish. Open 363 days for lunch, dinner and weekend brunch. Open Mon –Fri. 11:30 a.m.–10:30 p.m. Sat. 11:30 a.m.–10:30 p.m., Sun. 11:30–10 p.m. Main St., Bridgehampton. 631-537-0590, bobbyvans.com. HAMPTON COFFEE COMPANY Espresso Bar, Bakery, Cafe & Coffee Roastery $ A Hamptons classic since 1994 and a Dan’s Papers “Best of the Best!” Famous hand-roasted coffee, real baristas, muffins and bagels, egg sandwiches, a Mexican Grill and more. Open 6 a.m.–8 p.m. daily, year round. Locations in Water Mill next to The Green Thumb farmstand and in Westhampton Beach across from Village Hall and now in Southampton on the highway next to BMW. Also anywhere with their Mercedes Mobile Espresso Unit for your event! 631-726-COFE or visit them on Twitter and Facebook. hamptoncoffeecompany.com.

PIERRE’S Casual French $$$ Euro-chic but casual French restaurant and bar. Late dinner and bar on weekdays. Open 7 days. Brunch Fri.– Sun., 10 a.m.–5 p.m. 2468 Main Street, Bridgehampton. 631-537-5110, pierresbridgehampton.com.

north fork CLIFF’S ELBOW ROOM Steak and Seafood $$ The best aged and marinated steak, freshest seafood and local wines, in a casual, warm atmosphere. Lunch and dinner. Two locations: 1549 Main Road, Jamesport, 631722-3292; 1065 Franklinville Rd., Laurel. 631-298-3262, elbowroomli.com. Legends American $$ In historic New Suffolk for 20 years, offers “The Best of Both Worlds:” Fine dining in the sophisticated, cozy and eclectic dining room, and the classic bar with rich, warm woods and brass accents—both serve the same innovative food. Latenight burgers and light fare. 835 First Street, New Suffolk. 631-734-5123, legends-restaurant.com. NOAH’S Seafood $$$ Seafood-inspired small plates with a nod to local producers. Open 7 days for lunch and dinner from 11:30 a.m. to 10 p.m. On Friday and Saturday, The Lounge @ Noah’s serves a late night small bites menu and specialty cocktails with a DJ until 2 a.m. Outdoor dining available.136 Front Street, Greenport. 631-477-6720, chefnoahschwartz.com.

Family owned and operated Since 1958

Visit us on Facebook • www.elbowroomli.com

riverhead, westhampton THE ALL STAR All American $$ Premiere bowling, sports bar and entertainment venue. This industrial chic-inspired facility boasts 22 state-of-theart bowling lanes, VIP room with six private lanes, vortex bar with 12 inverted beer taps. 96 Main Road, Riverhead, 631-998-3565, theallstar.com. Buoy One Seafood & Steak $$ Offering the freshest fish and finest steaks, daily specials, Eat in or Take out. Call to inquire about our Buoy One Clam Bake. 62 Montauk Hwy., Westhampton 631-998-3808 & 1175 W. Main Street, Riverhead 631-208-9737, buoyone.com. Also in Huntington! TWEED’S Continental $$ Located in historic Riverhead, Tweed’s Restaurant & Buffalo Bar in the J.J. Sullivan Hotel serves the finest local food specialties and wines representing the best L.I. vineyards. Open 7 days for lunch and dinner. 17 E. Main St. 631-208-3151, tweedsrestaurant.com. Check out DansPapers.com for more listings and events.

75 MAIN

Free Wi-Fi !

zach erdem presents

Open 7 Days Lunch anD Dinner

“10 Best Restaurants on Long Island” ...USA Today Travel

SpecIALS sunDay

3 cOurse steak night $16.95

Cliff’s Elbow Too!

Cliff’s Rendezvous

sunDay - FriDay

Cliff’s Elbow Room

Burgers & Steaks!

TOUCH OF VENICE Italian $$ Proudly serving the North Fork for over 20 years. We take advantage of all the North Fork has to offer, preparing local cuisine with Italian soul. Extensive wine list featuring local and Italian wines, full bar with happy hour specials. Private room available for all occasions. Special chef’s family-style menu available for small groups. Winner of BOB 2012 Best Summer Drink: Blueberry Lemonade. 28350 Main Road, Cutchogue. 631-298-5851, touchofvenice.com.

MOnDay 3 cOurse pasta Dinner $14.00 tuesDay haLF price BOttLe OF Wine FrOM Our Wine List

1549 Main Rd, Jamesport • 722-3292

The Judge’s Have Spoken!

30921

For complete restaurant listings and more dining information, visit danshamptons.com

OSTERIA SALINA Sicilian/Italian $$ Think Sicilian ingredients like extra virgin olive oil, currants, pine nuts, fava beans couscous & candied oranges. Authentic Sicilian and family recipes from the Aeolian Island of Salina, including Caponatina, Bucatini con Sarde, Pesce Spada, Polpo, Artisanal Cannoli and Salina’s signature dessert, “Panino di Gelato.” 95 School Street, Bridgehampton. 631-613-6469, osteriasalina.com.

Cliff’s Elbow Room! North Fork Environmental Council’s 2011 Chili Night Cliff’s Elbow Room #1 for best traditional Chili!

Price Range Local Wine Kid-Friendly

OLD STOVE PUB American $$$ A Hamptons classic since 1969. Perfectly charred steaks at the oldest stove in the Hamptons. Open 7 Days, lunch Saturday and Sunday noon–3 p.m., Prix Fixe Sunday–Thursday four courses $29. Live piano Friday and Saturday. Reservations 3516 Montauk HWY Sagaponack. 631-537-3300.

Hampton Lady Restaurant Seafood $ Enjoy the freshest seafood with an Italian flare. Ocean and bay views. Check out our new menu. Open all year long for lunch & dinner. prixe fix lunch $14.99. Open New Year’s Eve. 363 Dune Road, Hampton Bays. 631-728-5239 MATSULIN Asian $$ Finest Asian Cuisine. Zagat-Rated. Lunch, Dinner, Sushi & Sake Bar. Catering available. Open daily from noon. 131 West Montauk Highway, Hampton Bays. 631-728-8838, matsulin.com.

DINING OUT KEY:

1085 Franklinville Rd, Laurel • 313 East Main St., Riverhead •

298-3262

727-6880

3 cOurse prix Fixe $24.95 aLL night* *incLuDes a gLass OF Wine

saturDays tOp internatiOnaL DJ’s anD taLent

75 Main Street • Southampton

www.75main.com • 75main.restaurant@gmail.com

631-283-7575

31455

southampton and hampton bays


dan’s Papers

Page 42 January 10, 2014

danspapers.com

Junk Removal 1-800-Got-Junk? (631) 750-9181 (800) 468-5865 www.1800GotJunk.com

Pool & Spa Backyard Masters (631) 501-7665 www.poolandspalongisland.com

Security/Alarms Berkoski Home Security (631) 283-9300 www.berkoskisecurity.com

Roofing

Line Roofing & Siding (631) 287-5042 www.631LINE.com

Plumbing / Heating ti Hardy Plumbing, Heating & AC (631) 283-9333 www.hardyplumbing.com

Landscaping/Snow Removal

Moving & Storage

Richard Sperber Landscaping (631) 324-4281 www.SperberLandscapes.com

Despatch of Southampton (631) 283-3000 www.despatchmovers.com

Window Replacement Renewal By Andersen of L.I. (877) 844-9162 http://renewal-by-andersen-long-island.com

Siding Fast Home Improvement (631) 259-2229 www.fasthomeimprovement.com

Propane Gas Petro Propane (855) 4U-PROPANE

(855) 487-7672

Basement Waterproofing Complete Basement Systems, LLC (516) 409-8822 (631) 935-0005 www.completebasementsystems.com

Fuel Oil Hardy/Berkoski Fuel (631) 283-9607 (631) 283-7700 www.hardyfuel.com

Window Treatments Wondrous Window Designs (631) 744-3533 www.wondrouswindowdesigns.com

Air / Heating / Geothermal Hardy Plumbing, Heating & AC (631) 287-1674 www.hardyplumbing.com

Oil Tanks Abandon/Testing Clearview Environmental (631) 569-2667 www.clearviewenvironmental.com

Finished Basements Gates / Deer Fence/ Screening Trees East End Fence & Gate (631) EAST END eastenddesign@aol.com (631) 327-8363

V.B. Contracting Inc (631) 474-9236 www.vbcontracting.com

Property Management Tom Kammerer Contracting, Inc. (631) 987-2602 www.kammererinc.com

Generators ators East Hampton Energy Solutions (631) 850-4374 Easthamptonenergy.com

SService D Directory’s

Make Your House A Home To place your business on this page,

please call 631-537-4900


dan’s Papers

danspapers.com

January 10, 2014 Page 43

PERSONAL SERVICES/ENTERTAINMENT/HOME SERVICES Winter Special Jan. 9-Feb. 28

Gift Certificates Available

$28/1 hour Reflexology * $49/1 hour Head, shoulder, neck, scalp massage Southampton Special: Mini facial $49/ 40 mins * Waxing 10% off

• Roofing • ChimnEyS • SiDingS • WinDoWS • gUTTERS • maSonRy

28961

631-287-1118 16 Hill Street #3

Hampton Bays Special:

31193

631-723-1118

3 East Montauk Hwy.

Furniture Re-Finishing & Repair

Young’s

Foot Relaxation Center

Wood Finishing Inc.

30569

(Located in the Calverton Commons • 2 miles west of Tanger Outlet) Open Foot rub 60 mins $28 – 2 people $25 each 7 Days a Week Buy 5, get 1 Free Full Body Rub $40/1 hour

10:30am-8:00pm

ADVANCED CHIMNEY

KOLB MECHANICAL

In Home Touch Up/Repair Service

631-591-2783

4482 Middle Country Rd. Calverton, NY 11933

631-723-3500

A Master in the Art of Wood Finishing

Leo Young

29632

Manicure $8 * Mini facial $45/ 40 mins

Serving Long Island 1 7 Years

Heating and Air Conditioning

Shop 631-730-6616 Office 631-664-8669

631-267-2242

www.youngswoodfinishing.com

Chimney Sweeps

www.kolbmechanical.com

Architectural Finishing

Clean Air is Trane Air™

24342

29272

1-800-914-3303 licenced & Insured: WC10036H99 • Nassau H0708070000 • Suffolk 27688HI 31185

Filipkowski Air, Inc

By Alex Alexander

NORTH FORK

By Claudia Matles 25213

NYC + The Hamptons

631-721-7515

22321

alexanderlivemusic.com

(516)790-9369

631-734-2827

25939

The Hampton’s Premiere Pilates facility since 1998.

Pilates • GYROtONiC Yamuna Body Rolling & Boutique

25181

631.204.0122

Get Ready for Winter Advertise Your Employment Opportunity in Dan’s Call 631-537-4900

Family-owned Business that offers 24/7 Emergency Service, Free Estimates and Affordable Maintenance Contracts.

GO

631-537-4900

Home & Commercial

adinfo@danspapers.com

31331

20 years of experience

(631) 484-7692

n e e Gr

• Air quAlity lity /SPore te tteSting eSting eS Sting • AS AASbeStoS SbeS Sbe beSto StoS toS te tteSting eS eS • Mold re rreMediAtion eMedi eM MediA ediAAtion tion • blAck blA bl lAck Ack Mold Mold SPeciAliStS • bAS bbASeMent ASeM ASe eMent Ment / crAwl crAwl crA Awl SPAce wAterProofing

% 0 0 1

cell # 631-495-6826 eastendwaterproofing.com -Serving the East End for 31 Years -

A division of Mildew Busters

email: info@flandershvac.com www.FlandersHVAC.com

23376

(631) 726-4640

Service Directory Deadline 5pm Thursday

631-238-4245 631-238-4245

Fully Licensed & Insured Lic.# 49495-H 28813

WATERPROOFING

NO

water SYSTEM THE

®

Piano Sales / Rentals

ClEan’n

30277

Since 1976!

PianoBarn.com

www. Buy•Sell•Rent•Move•Tune

www.nfav.com

Hamptons

info@hamptonscleanngo.com www.hamptoncleanngo.com

631-727-2762

In the Hamptons it’s...

631-287-2403 631-298-4545

For all your cleaning needs!

24354

Symmetry Studio

symmetrystudio.com 395 County Rd. 39A Southampton, N.Y. 11968

Available for Holiday Parties

Air Conditioning/Heating Heat Pumps/Humidification Radiant Heat Specialist

Whole House Audio & Video Home Theater • Security Integration Lighting Control • Shade Control Computer Networks • Audio Prewire Showroom At 6615 Main Rd., Mattituck

30088

Adults Children In Home or Studio

Our advertisers renew their Service Directory ads year after year. Call our Classified Department and make Dan’s Papers your storefront.

Custom Audio & Video

SERVICES

Sophisticated Live Music

Made in the USA-Keeping jobs at home ®

31449

PILATES, YOGA & HEALTH COUNSELING

Different than any other • Will keep your basement dry

631l 283 l 0758

Visit Us Online at Danspapers.com

• (Dry & Healthy)

To Place Service Directory or Classified ads, contact the Classified Dept. at 631-537-4900 M-F 8:30-6pm danspapers.com


dan’s Papers

Page 44 January 10, 2014

danspapers.com

HOME SERVICES ENVIRO-DUCT

Quality Crafted Homes

air duct cleaning chimney cleaning & repair dryer vent cleaning•wet basements

qualitycraftedhomesonline.com

30235

631.726.9300

24455

Air Quality issues & testing•mold remediation

Lic#27335-H, SHL002637

cleaning

a division of Custom modular Homes of long island

Lower Heating & A/c costs & improve your Air Quality!

enviroductny.com

631-283-0758

Serving the East End

23826

(631)287-6060

• (631)324-6060

LIC #4015-ME

OceanElectric.net

NEW HOMES

Builders of Custom driveway Gate systems

GJS Electric, LLC

30219 30219

Arbors • screening Trees PergolAs • Pool • sTone ProfessionAl fence insTAllATion Deer conTrol sPeciAlisTs

22302

Powerwashing #1 Deck Builder on the East End

23496

Classified Dept open 5 days! M-F 8:30am-6pm 631-537-4900

LLC

• All Phases of Electrical Work • Security Systems • Surveillance Systems • Home Automation

Lic/Ins Owner/Operated Over 20 Years Experience

Office: 631-403-4050 Cell: 631-525-3543 Brotherselectricny.com

All Types of Electrical Work for Renovations and New Homes • New Installations • Service Upgrades • Panel and Generator Installation • Landscape Lighting

(516) 902-1413

Custom made entry Gates

24-Hour EmErgEncy SErvicE For ALL Your eLectricAL needs

*Automatic Gate Operators Installed, Replaced, Repaired *Telephone Entry Systems and Cameras *Deer Driveway Gates * All Types of Fence Custom Made *Decks *Railing * Sunrooms *Awnings * Deer Fence Cedar Siding * Brick Pavers & General Construction

www.mrcec.com 631-287-2768

FAMILy OwnED AnD OPERATED 40 yEARS Res. Comm. Lic. #47949h

Ph 631 878-6303 Fx 631 878-7525 30383

Elegant Electric, Inc.

Licensed & Insured

Licensed & insured

21074

eastenddeck.net

327-8363

eastenddesign@aol.com

12222

ElECtRiCal ContRaCtoRs

23646

Design Installation •Repair

Brothers Electric

631-eAsT-enD

M.R.C.

26664

Licensed & Insured

30763

Classified Deadline 12 pm Monday

Residential/Commercial LED Lighting • Landscape Lighting Generators Provided & Serviced

www.gjselectric.com licensed/insured (631) 298-4545 • (631) 287-2403 xxxxx

WH+SH+EH LicEnSEd & inSurEd

LIC # 3842ME

Full Service Electrical Contracting

Lighting Design/Controls • Home Automation Computer Networks Audio/Video/HomeTheater Landscape Lighting • Automatic Generator Sales

EaSt End SincE 1982

30 YEArs ExpEriEncE

31467

and RE NOVATIONS

631-345-9393

automated gate openerS • Access equipment

DO IT “THE SHEA WAY”

30352

“The only thing we don’t do is a bad job”

Blake McNamara І 631•807•7965 blakewoodconstruction@yahoo.com

oWnEr oPEratEd WWW.danWLEacH.com

reSidential and CommerCial ClientS.

25942

631-668-1600

WilliamJSheaElectric.com

LICENCED INSURED

Full Service Builder & Remodeler

• dESignEd & inStaLLEd WitH cabLE raiLing • bLuE Star maHogany • iPE • cEdar • PoWErWaSHing • aLL rEPairS • LandScaPing • maSonry • Staining • PromPt • rELiabLE • ProfESSionaL QuaLity

Supplying a Complete line of gateS and gate operatorS for

Licensed & Insured

Construction

cuStom dEckS

AlphA Entry GAtE SyStEmS

800-704-GATE (4283)

Liscensed & Insured

Blakewood

dan W. LEacH

Our Electrical Services Include: • Lighting & Electrical Repairs • House & Home Office Wiring • Generator Sales & Installations • Computer, Telephone Wiring • Home Automation Services

5 Years Straight!

631-276-5012 Njlconst@gmail.com

9 Bayview Dr. West Sag Harbor N.Y. 11963

24-hr Emergency Service

Go Green!

N.J.L. Construction LLC Custom Renovations New Construction Interior/Exterior-Trim-Decks Kitchens-Baths & Property Management

Serving the hamptonS for 30 yearS

Our advertisers renew their Service Directory ads year after year. Call our Classified Dept. and make Dans’ your storefront. 631-537-4900 adinfo@danspapers.com

CRAFTSMAnFEnCEAnDDECk.nET

D’Alessio Flooring Total Shop-At-Home Service

Specializing in •Hardwood Flooring •Carpets and Area Rugs •Vinyl & Laminates •Sanding & Refinishing

CR Wood Floors Installations Sanding Refinishing Free Estimates

30 Years Experience-Owner Operated

Over 35 Years of Experience

631-478-2385

30967

30802

Dan’s Best of the Best

William J. Shea ElEctric

Lic’d

631-599-2454 631-909-2030

To Place Service Directory or Classified ads, contact the Classified Dept. at 631-537-4900 M-F 8:30-6pm danspapers.com

Ins’d


dan’s Papers

danspapers.com

January 10, 2014 Page 45

HOME SERVICES Reclaimed Antique Lumber

Champion

S

DEXTER

hardwood Flooring

CONTRACTING

Handy Mike

Lic

23696

Since 1975 Father - Son Team All Phases of Carpentry

631-878-3625 licensed & insured 31463

Carpet one

Kitchens, Baths Deck Repairs Paint/Spackle Power Washing Licensed & Insured

Suffolk Lic # 4432 SH L002528

DBA as Four Seasons Aluminum Siding

Siding, Windows, Doors

631-283-6526

Floor & Home

Dust Free

“the atomic DCS” Sanding & Finishing Installations Buffing & Waxing Starting at $1.99 SF G U TResidential T E R S • Commercial 631-758-0812

Flooring nBarnwood & Siding nBeams nBarns/Log Cabins

267.404.2214

www.oldreclaimedwood.com

31312

bryan trudden construction

Classified Dept open 5 days! M-F 8:30am-6pm 631-537-4900

Sanding System

nAntique

Call VillaMarilyn

917■ 273 ■ 8710

Windows | Roofing | Siding

MMIMARILYN@aol.com 29852

Extensions | Dormers

bryantrudden@yahoo.com | 631-902-3857 29807

CERTIFIED DEALER FOR

Dennis Schorndorf Inc.

D.Q.G. INC. GUTTERS

General ContraCtor

Alterations • Renovation Built in Cabinets Interior Trimwork Kitchen Installation (including IKEA)

Alex Tel: 631-258-5608 www.alexkhgc.com

Painting Interior/Exterior

Customized Carpentry Kitchen & Bath Remodeling Deck Specialist

alexkhgc@gmail.com Licensed & Insured

Call For All Your Handyman Needs

631-287-9277

www.southamptonhandyman.com Lic & Ins

SH Lic 0001114

13131

Fine Home Improvements - Custom Homes

1/31/10 3:20 PM

Copper & Aluminum Professional Installations & Cleaning Attention to Detail Un-matched Craftmanship Suffolk Lic. 15194-H 631-758-0812 www.DQGINC.com

29620

D.Q.G. New Art.indd 1

All Jobs Big and Small All Exterior and Interior • Handyman Projects • Decks & Fence • Painting • Windows • Land Clearing • Misc. • Bath & Kitchen Renovation Specializing in Project Mgt. References Available Licensed & Insured MIKe 631-324-2028 CeLL 631-831-5761 26457

renovations & additions - Kitchens & Baths architectural & Design Services

631-723-0437 • 631-871-3161 dshomes91@gmail.com • dscontracting.net Serving the East End Since 1990

Service Directory Deadline 5pm Thursday

HOUSE WATCHING

by Jim

29867

GUTTER PROTECTION

A Fair Price For Excellent Work

Fine Carpentry

30 years of protecting & beautifying homes

23222

1.888.9DUSTFREE

COPPER & ALUMINUM PROFESSIONAL INSTALATIONS & CLEANING . ATTENTION TO DETAIL UNMATCHED CRAFTSMANSHIP &

Ins 24353

Carpentry - Kleer PVC Trimboards

Call for Free price Quote

SEE OUR NEW WEBSITE

WWW.DQGINC.COM

Home Renovations, Caretaking, Painting, Landscaping MGI Interior design, Art, Estate Management, ALL Home needs. House care year round.

24608

“A family business”

The result of a passion for both history and woodworking

631-287-1617

29852

my only business is making hardwood flooring beautiful!

Serving the community for over 25 years Specializing in all phases of Home Remodeling Custom Builder

28422

Installations • Sanding Finishing • Repairs Custom Staining & Decks

20 Years Experience

Handy Hamptons

General ContraCtinG

Quality CraFtsmansHip WitH attention to detail

10% off all decking & painting 29471

• Kitchen • Bath • doors • Windows • decking • moulding • sheetrock • painting • Finished Basements • Custom Woodworking Call phillip totah 631-949-2522 handyhamptons@aol.com lic. ins.

LIKE THIS ARTICLE

Like Dan’s on Facebook!

Professional & Dependable References Available

cell 516.449.1389 office 631.324.2028

heimer Constructio n r e n Bey Renovations/Additions

26459

Decks, Roofing, Siding Interior-Exterior Trim Kitchens/Baths, Flooring Basements, Windows & Doors Design • Permits • Management EPA Certified Home Remodeler Licensed & Insured

Best Level Contracting

Res./Comm.

Lic./Ins.

631.728.3290

SH L000242 EH 6015-2010

hamptonshomebuilder.com “Over 30 years of distinctive craftsmanship”

24581

Remodelng & Painting

References

Ins. xxxxx

Tom Kammerer Contracting, Inc. • All Phases of Carpentry • Renovations & Extensions • Kitchen Remodeling • Roofing & Siding Framing, Decks, Dormers & Trim Work • Interior & Exterior Painting

631❖ 664 ❖ 5191

www.gutierrezhomeimprovement.com

•All Phases Construction/ Renovation A-Z •Conscientious/ Reliable/ Honest •Full Property Management Services Licensed & Insured/ References

631-987-2602

29096

26460

All Work Guaranteed/Free Estimates

www.kammererinc.com • kammererinc@mac.com

29309

631-278-8881

Lic.

27922

• Handyman Services • Kitchen • Bath • Doors • Windows • Roofing • Siding • Decking 17 Years Experience Serving The Hamptons

Danspapers.com

To Place Service Directory or Classified ads, contact the Classified Dept. at 631-537-4900 M-F 8:30-6pm danspapers.com


Page 46

dan’s Papers

January 10, 2014

danspapers.com

HOME SERVICES I 631-723-3190

Commercial and Residential 20+ Years Experience All Work Guaranteed Owner on Site Free Estimates

Setting the Standard in Workmanship

Best View

Landscaping & Masonry Landscaping & garden Maintenance Lawn Mowing sod & reseeding spring clean-ups Fall clean -ups Mulching Weeding edging

Pesticide Application

NYS Certified Arborist & Designer on Staff

• Spraying • Deep Root Fertilizing • Trimming • Pruning • Stump Removal • Planting & Transplanting • Drains • Storm Cleanup • Complete Lawn Program • Masonry • Landscape Design • Grading • Brush Clearing • Irrigation 25890 • Sod & Seed • Soil Analysis • Low Voltage Lighting

Superior Landscaping Solutions, Inc.

insured

Hedge Trimming Tree Planting Tree removal irrigation Work Fences Bobcat services

coMpLete Masonry Work • Cobblestone Edges • Aprons • Walls • Brickwork • Patios • Ponds Walkways • Waterfalls • Driveways

Excellent references Free estimates 28449

Juan Marquina

Cell 631-513-9924

• Design • Installation • Garden Renovations • Transplanting • Ponds / Waterfalls • Fine Gardening • Lawn Maintenance • Re-vegetations • Perennial Gardens • Natural Screenings • Irrigation Installations/Service • Tree / Shrub Pruning & Removals • Spring / Fall Cleanups • Sod • Mulch • Bobcat Service / Land Clearing • Also Specializing in Masonry • Landscape Lighting Excellent References

RELIABLE QUALITY SERVICE

29271

Turf Expert • Member GCSAA • NYS DEC Certified Applicator 25 + years of Experience • Call for Appointment •Licensed • Insured

To Our Clients THANK YOU NYS DEC Certified Applicator LIC # C1811065

NYS DEC Business Reg # 11417

Protecting, nurturing, & Beautifying landscapes throughout the hamptons For 35 Years

Landscape Installation Maintenance     Lawn Care Plant Health Care      Organic Landscaping      Tree Pruning  Isa certIFIed arborIst lIcensed & Insured

EH LIC # 6378 SH LIC # L00225

425 County Rd 39A I Southampton I NY I 11968

631-204-1970

Professional, Prompt and Reliable Service

Now Offering Thermal Imaging

7 day/week service at no extra charge. Serving all of the Hamptons, Nassau, Suffolk, Manhattan, Brooklyn, Queens, Westchester as well as South Florida.

7 days a week at Office: 631.929.5454 Cell: 631.252.7775 email: Brad@themoldpro.com web: www.themoldpro.com Montauk to Manhattan

Certified & Insured

631-375-3847 917-886-8135

26185

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Danspapers.com

631-766-7131

26489

ENVIRO-DUCT

cleaning

air duct cleaning chimney cleaning & repair dryer vent cleaning•wet basements

All Island

Air Quality issues & testing•mold remediation

Landscaping Complete Landscape Provider Lawn Maintenance, Design, planting installation, clean-up, fertilizing, tree trimming, tree removal, flower gardens, indoor flowers, complete property management Call Jim or Mike 26458

www.billfoxgrounds.com

LIC #’s SH 002970-0 EH 5254

Certified Indoor Environmentalist

Countryside Lawn & Tree

631-765-3130 • 631-283-8025

Indoor Air Quality Specialists Residential & Commercial Mold Inspections & Testing

Brad C. Slack

• Landscape Maintenance Weekly Lawn and Garden Maintenance Pruning Spring/Fall Clean Ups • Gardening Annual/Perennial Plantings, Privacy Planting,Installation, Mulch, Woodchips, Topsoil • Landscape Construction Land Clearing, Grading, Filling, Drainage Systems, Retaining Walls and Planters Installed, Seed/Sod Lawns, Pond/Waterfall Installation • Masonry • Planning Design

bestviewlandscapingandmasonryinc.com

bestviewland@ymail.com

Inspections & Testing

29278 29278

HL

Licensed

Lic#27335-H, SHL002637

Licensed and Insured

Lower Heating & A/c costs & improve your Air Quality!

31448

www.hlicorp.com

enviroductny.com

631-283-0758

631-324-2028 631-723-3212

Serving the East End

Go Green!

Mobile Self-Storage aND MoViNg

References available

3 Steps to Affordable Storage and Moving

Ins.

631-324-4212

29956

countryside-eastend.com 26836

peconicbaylandscapes.com

Lic.

Linda Nelson

Company Inc.

• Bulkheading • Gabions • Floating Docks & Docks • House Piling • Rock Retaining Walls

decorative garden design + service

Major Credit Cards Accepted

Contact Kenny

handmade gifts

631-909-3454 Ins.

call: 631-524-5450

631-728-3364

createaerie.com

Complete Waterfront Contracting Floating Crane Service 23370

631.287.1075

JOSE CAMACHO

27954

Christopher Edward’s Landscape

631-283-5714 Licensed & Insured

www.libertymoving.com

“We Turn Your Dreams to Greens” 24516

• Sea Shore Planting Specialist • Bluff Stabilization • Dune Restoration • Native Planting • Landscape & Garden Installation • Hydroseeding

United Van Lines World Wide #1 in U.S. Liberty Moving & Storage

24291

LANDSCAPING SERVICE Tree Expert Tree Cutting & Pruning Trimming - Edging Mulching Planting Transplanting - Clean Ups Lawn Mowing - Weeding Garden Maintenance Mason - Driveways Cobblestone - Patio Bobcat Service

Owned and Operated by Long Islanders

Suffolk LIC # 45887-H

27274

• Masonry, Belgian Blocks, Pavers • SEASONED FirEwOOD • weekly Maintenance • Mowing • Drywells and Drainage Systems • irrigation Systems installed • Driveways, walkways, retaining walls • Tree and Shrub Planting, Trimming & Removal • Sod and Seed Lawns installed • Bobcat Service • Spring and Storm Cleanups • Gutter Cleaning

www.zippyShell.coM

Tide Water Dock Building

(631) 353-1754 Cell

“Designing & Building Residential Golf Greens in the Hamptons for over 20 YEARS”

For Information: 631.744.0214

personalputtinggreens.com

Servicing Nassau & Suffolk since 1990

25065

SOUTHAMPTON MASONRY

All Masonry & Ceramic Tile Supplies Masonry & Tile Supplies

Southampton 1540 County Road 39 631•259-8200 Wainscott 30 Montauk Hwy, 631•537-6353 24303

631•234•3000 212•223•6400

Southampton Commack • NYC 29754

26274

Flat Rate PRicing Local • Long Distance • Overseas

Southampton

Moving & Storage NYC To East End Daily • Express Delivery To All Points On The East Coast

(631) 321-7172 www.mjmovinginc.com

Family Owned & Operated

NYS DOT T35255 LIC/INS • US DOT 1086657 24176

Classified Deadline 12 pm Monday

call 631-537-0500 to advertise.

To Place Service Directory or Classified ads, contact the Classified Dept. at 631-537-4900 M-F 8:30-6pm danspapers.com


dan’s Papers

danspapers.com

January 10, 2014 Page 47

HOME SERVICES

WWW.DESPATCHMOVERS.COM

(631) 283-3000 * (212) 924-4181 * (631) 329-5601

631-278-8881

NYDOT # T12050 USDOT # 1372409

Lic.

References

Nardy Pest CoNtrol

Oil Tank 4 Generations Quality Home Improvements nofkthe Oil TaOn South Fork.

* Botanical Products availaBle

Serving the Hamptons 55 Years

FREE ESTIMATES & ADVICE Call 631-569-2667 EmErgEnCy Call 631-455-1905 CLEARVIEWENVIRONMENTAL.COM 26062

WINNER DAN’S BEST 2010-2013 ENVIRONMENTAL COMPANy

InterIor • exterIor

jwpoolservice@aol.com

SpecialiStS in: Asphalt Roofs Cedar Shake flat Roof • EPDM Copper Vinyl Siding Slate Roofs

631-726-4777 631-324-7474 www.nardypest.com

Free Estimates

over 10 yrs Experience

NK’S PAINTING A H S Painting Fine Homes in the Hamptons For 35 years

iNC.

Catering to the Hamptons for over 30 years

631•725•4315

29043

INTERIOR

Painting • Staining • Wallpaper Installation & Removal • Faux Finishes

•Property Management •House Watching •Emergencies •Home Inspections

EXTERIOR

Painting • Powerwashing • Staining Paint Stripping • Restoration

631-909-7028

Christopher T DiNome 631.283.6727 www.dinomepaintinginc.com

26875

Realistic A ARoofing

Lic. 631-875-5735 ins.

Service Directory Deadline 5pm Thursday

DiNOME PAiNTiNG

24853

Licensed & Insured • Free estimates

Lic. 631-874-0745 Ins.

24562

Free Estimates

Staining & Painting • Mildew Control

Kathleen L. Ploeger • 631.725.8368

• Certified pool operator on staff • Opening / Closing, Repairs • Weekly & Bi-Weekly Service • Loop Loc safety cover, fences • Pool Heaters • Pool Liners • Coping,Tile & Marble Dusting • Renovations • Leak Detection Service

NYS Certified Applicators

29472

TANK - SOIL TESTING TANK ABANDONMENTS, REMOVALS & INSTALLS OIL - WATER PUMP OUTS 24/7 OIL SPILL CLEAN UP

A Full Service Company

Is Your Solution To Pest Paranoia!

A Brush of Fate Painting, InC.

Oil Tank

JW’s Pool Service

Relax…

Ins. xxxxx

Call Now For Details!

26098

24536

• Painting • Staining • Interior/Exterior • Powerwashing • Repairs • Siding • Decks • Fence 17 Years Experience Serving The Hamptons

Hamptons Leak Detection Specialists

27832

* Serving All Your Moving Needs * Call for a Free No Obligation Estimate And Let’s Make Despatch Your Mover of Choice

27921

LOCAL * LONG DISTANCE * OVERSEAS CONTAINERIZED STORAGE * DIGITAL INVENTORY

Tick Trauma! Ant Anxiety! Mouse Mania!

29105

Best Level Contracting Painting & Remodelng

www.TwinForksPM.com info@TwinForksPM.com

We work your hours! Dan’s Classifieds and Service Directory open: 8:30am-6pm Monday–Friday

631-537-4900

Lic’d Bonded Insured 24292

31465

Over 20 Yrs Experience

intErior/ExtErior homE imProvEmEnts Deck Maintenance & RepaiR

mold removal

p ainting & S taining

BEst PricEs EstFimreaetes

631-728-9090

31504

Low Prices

MulveyPluMbing@oPtonline.net

J.P Mulvey PluMbing & Heating, inC. www.MulveyPluMbing.CoM

162 e. Montauk Hwy., HaMPton bays, ny 11946

Classified Deadline 12 pm Monday

631-287-3117 631-329-1250 24177

GC Painting & PowErwashing

(631) 283-2234 (631) 728-6347 FaX: (631) 728-6982

22662

Get Ready for Winter Advertise Your Employment Opportunity in Dan’s Call 631-537-4900

Family owned & operated • 7o th Anniversary

To Place Service Directory or Classified ads, contact the Classified Dept. at 631-537-4900 M-F 8:30-6pm danspapers.com


Page 48

dan’s Papers

January 10, 2014

danspapers.com

HOME SERVICES fox tree service Working with Nature Roofing SpecialiStS Specialifox S tree service

Specializing in: ROOFING SIDING WINDOWS INSULATION GUTTERS

• • • • •

WE INSTALL WHAT WE SELL FAMILY OWNED AND OPERATED KITCHENS/BATHROOMS EXTENSIONS/DOORMERS CULTURED STONE

WE OFFER THE ONLY LIFETIME MFG WORKMANSHIP WARRANTY

Licensed & insured certified

think trees Removals & Stump Grinding think fox Storm Damagetree Repairs fox service

BiologicalInsect Insect&&Disease DiseaseControl ControlPrograms ProgramsAvailable Available Biological

Working with Nature

Suffolk License #22,857-HI

6 3 1 .2 8 3 .6think 7 0 0 • www.foxtreeservice.com think trees trees Biological Insect & Disease Control Programs Available

631.345.2539

think trees think fox think fox

www.mStevenSRoofing.com www.m oofing.com

855-895-roof

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January 10, 2014 Page 49

EMPLOYMENT/CLASSIFIEDS Classified & Service Directories

Phone: 631.537.4900 • Email: adinfo@danspapers.com • Fax: 631.287.0426 158 County Rd, Southhampton NY 11968 Hours: 8:30am-6pm, Monday thru Friday Publication distributed Thursday & Friday Deadlines: Classified: Monday 12pm Service Directory: Thursday 5pm

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dan’s Papers

Page 50 January 10, 2014

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CLASSIFIEDS/ REAL ESTATE FOR RENT AND SALE Largest WeekLy CirCuLation in the hamptons pLus speCiaL manhattan DeLivery Largest WeekLy CirCuLation in the hamptons pLus speCiaL manhattan DeLivery

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DAN’S PAPERS

January 10, 2014 Page 51

EVERYTHING OVER A MILLION

UNDER A MILLION

Beautiful homes sold this week

Bargains on the East End

Real Estate Roundtable: The Experts Divulge

T

he real estate market on the East End is like no other in the country. From the unique properties offered across the North and South Forks to the particular factors that move the markets here, understanding East End real estate requires a true insider perspective. Where can you find that perspective? Right here. Every week, we turn to a virtual roundtable of experts in East End real estate for their insights into developing trends, their knowledge about national real estate news influencing the local market and their thoughts on buying and selling. Home mortgage debt rose in the third quarter of 2013 for the first time since the end of 2008, according to a new report from the Federal Reserve. What does this indicate for the Hamptons housing market? “The increase in the home mortgage debt is a very positive sign for our housing market. Although the Federal Reserve has been adding to the money supply in record numbers, prior to the third quarter it had not translated to an increase in home mortgages. This will especially aid the middle market which has lagged behind both the high and low end, which requires less or in some cases, no financing.”—Alan Schnurman, Licensed Associate Real Estate Broker, Saunders and Associates

Color Corrected

“Home mortgage debt rising is generally a good sign for the housing market. During tough times in the housing market, many more buyers are all cash and we are beginning to see a change as normal service is resumed. The Hamptons market continues to improve and Q3 saw an increase in both number of sales at 31%, and sales over $5 million increase by 54%, and we expect to see this continue as new inventory and an increase in newly developed properties arrive on the market to replace the inventory that had been somewhat stagnating.”— Maz Crotty, Licensed Real Estate Salesperson, Nest Seekers “Housing is back as a solid investment, as demonstrated by buyers leveraging other people’s money to buy again. This means that purchasers expect housing to appreciate because they are taking on debt to get into the game. So, expect expansion and growth to be in store for the Hamptons housing market in 2014. Now is when real estate in the Hamptons should be fun again.”—Andrew M. Lieb, Esq, MPH, Lieb at Law, P.C. “Obviously, banks are loosening up on lending in the United States according to this report from the Fed. However, the Hamptons are a unique microcosm and what happens in the rest of the country doesn’t necessarily correlate to us. It has been my experience that the homes under a million are hot and many of those buyers are obtaining financing. However, I still see all cash deals taking place in the higher price

nestseekers.com

By janet cohren

Your dream house is waiting...

points.”—John Christopher, Licensed Associate Real Estate Broker, Brown Harris Stevens “I’m not Ben Bernanke or Janet Yellen but I don’t think the small adjustment in interest rates will affect our sales. Money is still inexpensive for now and buyers will take advantage of cheap money.”—Lynn November, Licensed Associate Real Estate Broker, Douglas Elliman Real Estate Read more about the Real Estate Roundtable on DansPapers.com.

31526


real estate

Page 52 January 10, 2014

danspapers.com

Everything Over a Million SALES REPORTED AS 1/3/2014

Clubhouse with outdoor heated pool. Housing Choice Vouchers Welcome.

1 & 2 Bedroom Apartments starting from

$881 per mo. $940 Call

(631) 369-2598

31487

Heat, hot water, groundskeeping and trash removal included. Abundant parking.

Residents must be 55 years or older & income restrictions apply

30-Year Conforming fixed raTe morTgage

4.375

%

RATE

4.585

AMAGANSETT Gregory G. Coleman Trust to 349 Promised Land Road LLC, 349 Cranberry Hole Road, $4,450,000

Sag Harbor Ben & Margot Fooshee to Roxanne Taylor 10 Hampton Street, $1,500,000

Leslie K. Valente to Jacqueline Judd, 54 Canvasback Lane $3,715,000

Nancy & Ronald Vanderkamp to Debra & Steven Shepsman, 61 Widow Gavits Road, $3,537,500

East HAMPTON Robert & Rosalind Woolcott to Michele & Thomas Bass 2 Sawmill Lane, $3,940,000

Sagaponack Charlotte & William Zafiros to Amy & Randall Kessler 14 Birchwood Lane, $1,175,000

Barry Sonnenfeld to Amber & Zachary Berger, 90 Bull Path $3,261,000

Shelter Island Heights Edward Barr to Virginia Anderson, 1 Bayview Avenue $1,250,000

Montauk James & Katherine Hewitt to Ann Louis Fischer 116 Old West Lake Drive, $1,830,000

Southampton Bernt Svendby to Adam Sandberg, 278 Towd Point Road, $1,850,000

QuOGUE Frederick K. Martin to Matthew Blank, 3 Winnebogue Lane, $2,800,000

6 Halsey Farm Associates LLC to Jeffrey & Nancy Tepper, 6 Halsey Farm Drive, $6,300,000

Remsenberg Barry & Laurie Drucker to James & Lauren Molloy 6 Ringneck Road, $1,925,000

HHH

Westhampton Beach Barbara & Melvin Robinson JNC Inc to 239 Oneck Lane, $2,247,500

BIG DEAL OF THE WEEK: Quogue

Cotswolds LLC to Jane C. Novak, 26 Quantuck Lane, $7,500,000

%

APR*

*APR = Annual Percentage Rate. Quoted rate requires payment of 1.750 discount points. The 30-year conforming fixed rate mortgage applies to loan amounts up to $417,000. 30-year loan payment is $4.99 per month per $1,000 borrowed. Payment does not include amounts for applicable taxes and insurance premiums. Actual monthly payment will be greater. Rates subject to change without notice. Other conditions may apply.

SALES OF NOT QUITE A MILLION DURING THIS PERIOD

CUSTOMER PROOF

AMAGANSETT Abigail & William Fleming to Jared E. Ripp 52 Schellinger Road, $706,150

Ad shown may be larger than actual size for proofing purposes

DATE

4/12/10

FILE

JohnWesleyVillage410.pdf

DISPLAY SIZE

(1/4PG AD) 3.45”w x 4.35”h

COLOR FORMAT

Color

HHH

Are you thinking of refinancing?

Read all copy carefully and check the appropriate box.

Call David today most reliable source for Please Sign and fax toThe 631-698-4162 for details. estate information Ad is OK to run as is 631-369-2333

real

East HAmpton Antonios Malamatinakis to David Stone 479 Hands Creek Road, $692,000

CONSTRUCTION LOANS WELCOME

Ad is OK to run with changes indicated. David Catalano Now Available! nt Signature: ____________________________ Direct Lender - No Middleman

NMLS #619306

633 East Main Street, Suite 2, Riverhead 631-369-2333

31485

Mortgage Consultant NMLS # 646375 dcatalano@ulstersavings.com

a representative office

The Coolest Address in the Hamptons...

Accurate, up-to-date, affordable, on-line information about all real estate transactions in your community. Our weekly reports contain:

East MArion Charles & Rosemary Luscher to James D. Daly 820 Bayview Drive, $782,500 East Quogue Mary Louise Cavanaugh to Leslie D. Wheeler-Mallon 14 Weesuck Avenue, $870,000

> All Residential and Commercial closed sales in your area

Hampton Bays Susan E. Lebert to Town of Southampton 1 Mohawk Road, $690,000

> A weekly list of mortgage Lis Pendens filings

Jamesport Frank & Marie Gasparini to Donald & Mary Anne DeCarlo, 16 Adelia Path, $875,000

> The most up-to-date information available

Mattituck David & Jennifer Lozipone to George & Lisa Wallace 430 Bailie Beach Road, $625,000

The most comprehensive reporting methods available, delivered right to your inbox every week.

Visit us at: www.LIRealEstateReport.com

1143168

This is the Hamptons!

Cutchogue Steven G. Bornschein to Joshua Kelinson 560 Oak Street, $530,000

For more info, call: 631-539-7919

Montauk David & Denise Spar to Scrumpyhw LLC, 62 Jackson Road, $930,000 North HAven Beverly & Donald Martin to Michael Gluckman 88 Sunset Beach Road, $925,000 Orient Andrew & Catherine Zurl to Betty & Mark Nicholis 250 Pettys Drive, $700,000


danspapers.com

real estate

January 10, 2014 Page 53

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real estate

Page 54 January 10, 2014

danspapers.com

Heart of Westhampton Beach

BuColiC ReMsenBuRg estate

HeaRt oF WestHaMPton BeaCH Village...Dune RoaD BeaCHes

Remsenburg. Center Hall Colonial by renown architect, Aymar Embury. Beautiful sited 5 bedroom home on pristine 2.6 park-like acres. Salt water pool, Har Tru tennis, this grand estate is iconic Remsenburg. Stately specimen trees, den, formal dining, fieldstone fireplaces, main floor and upper level master suites. Exclusive. $2.5M WeB# 11864

Westhampton Beach Village. Traditional 4 bedroom home in the heart of the village. Corner .6 acre property welcomes you via center hall entry, spacious kitchen, dinette, formal dining, downstairs guest bedroom, living room with fireplace, sun drenched sitting room. Pool and guest House. Only a short stroll from bustling Main Street & Dune Road beaches. Exclusive. $1.195M WeB# 55059

one aCRe soutH Quogue- stYle anD sPaCe

DisCoVeR east MoRiCHes - neW ConstRuCtion

Quogue. This renovated 4 bedroom home is the perfect marriage of crisp style and fine craftsmanship in the idyllic Village of Quogue. Spacious, open floor plan with handsome kitchen and walk-in pantry. West facing screened porch attached to blue stone patio and outdoor shower. Lush, beautifully landscaped acre. Exclusive. $1.75M WeB# 25540

east Moriches. Spectacular new construction in the charming hamlet of East Moriches. Center Hall Colonial with 4 bedrooms, 4.5 baths, sun drenched living + formal dining room with coffered ceilings. Impressive eat-in kitchen with center island + breakfast bar. Rec Room, home gym + fitness center. Home office with conference room, kitchenette and bath. Exclusive. $1.19M WeB# 10372

Maria Cunneen Licensed Associate RE Broker m: 631.445.7890 maria.cunneen@corcoran.com

THE HAMPTONS

SHELTER ISLAND

NORTH FORK

31505

Equal Housing Opportunity. The Corcoran Group is a licensed real estate broker. 92 Main Street, Westhampton Beach, NY 11978 | 631


The Highlands Club at Aquebogue & Reeves | Priced from $499,990 Amidst the pastoral landscape of Long Island’s North Fork, discover two unique single family communities that offer resortstyle living only the Highlands Club can offer. Our 79 single-family homes are set among quarter-acre lots in a premier location in Aquebogue – the gateway to Long Island’s wine country. Adjacent to the critically acclaimed Long Island National Golf Club, residents can take in the picturesque setting before them. The Highlands Club provides what we all search for in an ideal home: the privacy of home ownership with the benefits of exclusive amenities. For those seeking a slightly different neighborhood layout, The Highlands Club at Reeves, is located just 2 miles west of Aquebogue. Sitting on 1/3-acre lots, it is nestled by the much sought-after Cherry Creek Golf Course. Regardless of whichever community you prefer, both are in incredible locations, close to fine dining, entertainment, the Hamptons and Long Island Sound’s magnificent beaches. Residents can enjoy the beautiful, sprawling grounds, without having to sacrifice easy access to major travel corridors. Choose from several models that best suits your lifestyle and needs. All available with beautiful wood trim, wood flooring, granite countertops, stainless steel appliances and so much more. All homes offer a luxurious first floor master suite, generous living space, full basements and two car garages. Come discover the best North Folk living has to offer. www.LifeontheNorthFork.com Open Daily from Noon Call On-Site Sales Office: 631.722.5900 www.elliman.com/highlandsclub_aquebogue www.elliman.com/highlandsclub_reeves

*The complete offering terms are in an offering plan available from the Sponsor. © 2013 Douglas Elliman Real Estate. All material presented herein is intended for information purposes only. While, this information is believed to be correct, it is represented subject to errors, omissions, changes or withdrawal without notice. All property information, including, but not limited to square footage, room count, number of bedrooms and the school district in property listings are deemed reliable, but should be verified by your own attorney, architect or zoning expert. Photos shown may have been manipulated. Equal Housing Opportunity.


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