5PRODUCTS FOR YOUR FIVE SENSES

FIGURING OUT HOW TO SET THE MOOD CAN FEEL LIKE A CHALLENGE IN ANY RELATIONSHIP, NEW OR OLD. EXPLORING THE FIVE SENSES CAN TAKE YOUR INTIMACY TO THE NEXT LEVEL. SO, TURN OFF THE LIGHTS, START THE MUSIC, AND LIGHT A CANDLE, BECAUSE THINGS ARE ABOUT TO GET HOT.

Heat things up with the perfect candle. A good scent can be a powerful aphrodisiac that sets the scene for the evening. Look for soft notes of a subtle combination.

Taste

HIGH ON LOVE SENSUAL MASSAGE OIL

Become irresistible with a delicious, edible massage oil. Before getting in the sheets, a nice massage goes a long way to set the mood. The white chocolate taste is a sweet addition.

Position Of The Day

When setting the mood, learning about what you and your partner enjoy, through touch is key. Find new positions daily to spice up your experiences.

ISLA LINGERIE

Let your eyes linger on your partner with a sexy look. Believe it or not, physical appearance plays into attraction and creates that intimate mood you’re searching for.

Listen

Playlist

It’s time to introduce you to the best playlist for getting you and your partner turned on. Music quite literally sets the tone for the evening, so set it right with this playlist.

IT’S ONLY HUMAN TO CARE ABOUT OTHERS BUT YOU SHOULDN’T LOSE YOURSELF IN THE PROCESS. COMPASSION FATIGUE CAN AFFECT ANYONE FROM TEACHERS AND HEALTHCARE WORKERS TO NON-PROFIT LEADERS AND FAMILY MEMBERS. LEARN HOW TWO INDIVIDUALS RECOGNNIZE AND COMBAT THEIR COMPASSION FATIGUE.

ynette Graves doesn’t have time to be exhausted because people might die. It’s not an exaggeration. She’s a neonatal intensive care unit nurse. She cares for babies in the ICU day in, day out. She’s done it for 26 years now. Some days are full of miracles. Others leave her bones tired.

“I had a patient who ended up having not a very good delivery…(the baby) has a severe brain injury,” Graves says.

And when something like that happens, it’s hard not to be emotionally invested. At work. At home. All the time. There isn’t a switch Graves can flip and suddenly not care.

It’s a problem that a lot of caregivers like Graves face. Doctors, nurses, social workers, teachers and more can all suffer from what’s known as compassion fatigue. According to a National Institute of Health (NIH) study, compassion fatigue is the “stress resulting from exposure to a traumatized individual.”

In Graves’ case, that’s tiny babies struggling to make it through the day. And the impacts of compassion fatigue can be pretty severe: exhaustion, anger, a lack of empathy, an impaired ability to make decisions, and even substance abuse. Another NIH study from 2015 says that up to 40 percent of ICU professionals have compassion fatigue.

“When you have a bad day, or a baby dies, you go home, and you just hug your babies. You just thank God for what you have,” Graves says.

But compassion fatigue isn’t exclusive to health care workers. It can happen to anyone. Sedina Traljesic exhibits every sign and symptom of compassion fatigue. She sits on the board of directors for Des Moines Refugee Support and is a former refugee from Bosnia.

“Volunteering for refugee support is heart-wrenching,” she says. “Often, I feel helpless advocating for these folks and knowing the unpredictability that they face. Seeing the restrictive national policies and an oppressive political climate for immigrants exacerbates the sense of helplessness.”

Even though these things like national policies are out of her control, Traljesic still blames herself when things go wrong.

“I feel anger towards the events or people that cause those to suffer,” she says. “I blame myself and have thoughts of not having done enough to help people.”

While Traljesic is extremely passionate about her job, she recognizes that this is not a sustainable way to live.

“I’ve realized that if I don’t take care of myself first, then I can’t take care of others,” she says. “If I am in bed because I’ve pushed myself into exhaustion and burnout, I can’t help others. To effectively help others, we must help ourselves first.”

She recommends setting boundaries with work and other people to maintain a healthy body and mind. She no longer answers emails after five or on the weekends. Her phone is on “do not disturb” starting at 9 p.m. She’s started exercising and pushes herself to have more of a social life. And, maybe most importantly, she’s learned to empathize with others without taking everything to heart.

“Celebrate all wins, big or small,” Traljesic says. “I’ve had to increase my self-awareness, to be present, to acknowledge the things I did accomplish versus the things I didn’t. We must give ourselves more selfempathy and grace.”