A Dimming Candle

A Dimming Candle

by Mario Adan Perez

As we leave the frigid month of the new year, people forget about their new year’s resolutions and are back to stressing or enjoying the month of love, February. Romantic duos host the brightest burning form of love, not the sort you are obligated to through family or the kind of platonic love that has a far higher success rate where, for the most part, fewer tears are shed. The passion, care, and intimacy that romance promises are reason for many singles to solemnly yearn for such affections during this time of the year. On the flip side of the coin, many in an actual supposed romantic relationship feel trapped, jealous, and resentful, and this month, before Valentine’s Day, is usually the straw that breaks the lovers back.

Love burns like a fire, but like an actual fire, it must be constantly fueled and tendered to feel its warmth for long periods of time. Many become burnt out and find out that maybe their “perfect” lover is not who they thought them to be. When so close to another person for so long, it does not take long for the darker side of an individual to show. Sometimes, both allow strong, impulsive emotions to hurt each other. Being with the right (Or wrong) woman or man can make the minutes feel like hours, the weeks like months.

Love can be messy, and it usually does not end in a daring rush to the airport to tell them their true feelings before it is too late, or reading your now elderly partner a notebook of how you both first met to reignite that spark every single night. Rather, it ends in crying behind closed doors complimented by a very profound “user not found” sight on Instagram.

Valentine’s day brings this end sooner rather than later for plenty of couples, as this day requires commitment. Any sensible person in a relationship is going to expect a movie night, bouquet, or box of chocolates. If one person knows that the relationship is not going anywhere, or they do not like the other at all anymore, why should they put themselves through a day of giving them pricey flowers or being obligated to say words that they stopped meaning a long time ago? Who wants to spend another night right next to a person that has hurt them, or who they no longer enjoy being with?

Many feel a need to prove that they indeed lasted a month, because it felt like ages for both of them. It is a common sight to see a friend post on Instagram

“One month <3” “5 months <3” then suddenly both of them have erased any evidence of each other’s existence on their accounts. Some couples slowly lose the spark as the petty arguments and unflattering tendencies stack up. Others lose the spark quite quickly as one or the other says heated, regretful

Many couples break up right before or around Valentine’s Day as a form of emotional amputation, jumping off a train before it stops at yet another night of sobbing.

“Many couples break up right before or around Valentine’s Day as a form of emotional amputation…”