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Online Dating in Youth Culture
Today
the
use
of
online
dating
services is bigger than ever before. With websites and apps like OkCupid, Tinder, match.com, Christian Mingle, Plenty of Fish, etc it has become more socially acceptable than years past to use these services to find a date. Even more recently though it seems like more young adults are using online dating services than ever before. It looks like everywhere you go everybody is on Tinder swiping left or right, on OkCupid, or talking about someone they met online. It is estimated by the Pew Internet and American Life Project that 20% of online dating users are between the ages of 18 and 35 years old. This brings up the question, why are such young people so interested in dating?
This zine features stories and opinions from myself and other young adults who have used online dating services. 1
one time a guy insisted on sending me a selfie
<- the selfie
<- Picture of his lunch
2
I interviewed people between the ages of 18 - 23 about their opinions and feelings about online dating. I asked them three questions major questions about their experiences.
1. DO YOU OR HAVE YOU EVER USED ONLINE DATING SERVICES? i.e. tinder, okCupid, even if you met someone on Facebook, twitter, or tumblr.
All 10 people admit to using online dating services. The most used was Tinder. Followed by OkCupid. Only one person had met a significant other on social media without meeting in person initially.
2. WAS YOUR EXPERIENCE GOOD OR BAD? All of the interviewed people said their experiences were a mixed bag.
Girls had the most negative experiences. A lot of them experienced guys who were too forward, racist, or sexist.
â&#x20AC;&#x153;There are a lot of creeps on dating services, but sometimes you find people who are hidden gemsâ&#x20AC;?
3
3. WHY DO SERVICES?
YOU
USE
ONLINE
DATING
Half of users admit that they really only use these services to casually hoook up with people. “i feel that most ppl are always longing for a communication w/ others weather its through friendship or a sexual relationship. and this is just another outlet for that.”
The other half say they use online dating because of social anxiety. They find it hard to meet new people in the real world but and online seems more confortable for them. One users said they use these services because everyone else is doing it. Another popular reason was to give the user a confidence boost. “i use it literally to see men compliment me”
4
Their Stories... Highlights from my interviews.
“one time I inadvertently matched with my ex-boyfriend’s best friend.”
“If I couldn’t sleep sometimes, I would dig out the half empty bottle of Fireball Whiskey from under my bed and play a game to find the worst dudes profiles I could find, while taking shots with myself.”
“The funny thing is, he only made a profile to see what it was. He was on it for about a week and had absolutely no intentions of making anything other than friends, he wasn’t even planning on meeting up with anyone in real life. And most of the people he messaged were other guys. So neither of us were even looking for each other, but we both found someone who we may be with for a very long time, if not the rest of our lives. We still don’t tell people we met online though. It kind of devalues everything we have.”
5
“I met my current boyfriend on tumblr totally accidentally. We’ve been together almost 2 years and are long distance. Everything is going great and I can’t imagine my life without him.”
“It’s always funny to run into my friends or co-workers on Tinder!”
“I love the weird things men say- I quote ‘I wanted to say you look so beautiful. maybe we could talk sometime. then again I think I’d faint if you even write me back lol’”
“last week I met up with a girl who I had just met the week before and this really weird thing happened where we started making out for the first time and like 10 seconds in she stops me and says “I think you’re smart, handsome, and funny, but I’m just so not attracted to you.” It was like an episode of louie. Weird something like that can happen when you don’t meet in person.” 6
Created by Devon Zilinek