Fashion

Fashion as a Coping Mechanism

As time passed and I was in college, I cut my hair and got bangs. With each change in my appearance, I got closer to who I was. I was regaining control of my body again and gaining my self-confidence back. It was similar to creating a customized character, except the character was me and I am real. “Through every knit, through every choice and decision, we have the power to express our personality through our clothing. What was once a bird with tied wings, can be released and set ready to fly through the expression of fashion. This is how I broke out, to fly on my own.”

Emily Schutz photographed by Editorial Photographer, Taylor Mair

My story is not an uncommon one and after suffering through a highly distressing event, I know that fashion can provide people with a voice. It tells others who you are, but more importantly, it can tell yourself who you are. I sat down with three FSU students to discuss their experiences with using fashion to reclaim their identities after trauma. Bailey Taylor was in middle school when her sister was sexually assaulted by three family friends. Not only that, but Taylor was unknowingly drugged and had to deal with the psychological aftermath of that experience. Her friends ignored her and she had felt entirely alone. In order to, “find her entrance into the world,” Taylor dyed her hair bold colors and experimented with makeup. Her initial goal was, “to feel closer to herself by portraying her style to the world,” and that she did. She posted tutorials on youtube and eventually gained tens of thousands of followers. Not only did people at school know who she was, but so did thousands of others from around the world. This is only one instance of someone who fought back through the power of expression.

Many use fashion to fight back in instances in which others attempt to control them. This was the case for Elizabeth Ranno, who was made fun

of in middle and high school for her body. The constant ridicule caused her to develop body dysmorphia which forced her to cover-up all the time. This continued until she came to college. Ranno saw so many different trends and styles when walking around on campus. Students dressed as they pleased and this inspired her. Eventually, she felt the need to make a change: “I want to feel confident. I want to feel pretty. I want to show myself off because I haven’t done it in nineteen years,” she admitted. Ranno is now finding her style and sense of self through fashion. She experiments with various hairstyles, creates art out of her nails and wears clothing that stands out to her. Ranno has discovered that she enjoys thrifting because it allows her to create something beautiful out of something that has been discarded.

With a story very similar to my own, this student, who chose to remain anonymous, was in a sexually abusive and controlling relationship during her teenage years. While in this relationship, she was forced to do things that she wasn’t comfortable with and to only wear clothes that her boyfriend approved. After finally ending the relationship, she started to wear beachy and seventies inspired clothes that she liked. She pierced her nose and dyed her hair, which she said: “I think it’s helped me take back some of the power I once lost because I didn’t have to ask for an opinion. I just did it without fear of repercussions and to make myself happy and feel confident.” For her, this was also a way to fight back at her abuser. She changed her appearance in ways that she knew he wouldn’t approve, because she finally could and because she wanted to, stating “I’ve been going blonde slowly because I have always wanted to but he only liked brunettes.” By altering her appearance in this way she was able to regain a sense of control and ownership of her own body. should not be your only coping mechanism, but it has certainly helped me to realize that my body is mine, not my abusers. Despite the things that have happened to these women and me, we show the world who we are confidently and the ability to express ourselves through a medium that we resonate with has made all the difference. A person’s sense of style has the ability to be their sense of self. It is an empowering tool, which has guided me towards my freedom from the mental impact of my past.

At seventeen years old, I was a victim of sexual assault by my then-boyfriend. The entire relationship was abusive, yet I didn’t realize this until talking with my friend later on. “Emily, that’s assault,” she said. All-day I tried to make sense of it and I felt as though this experience had just happened to me, despite that it occurred five months prior. Unaware of how to cope and feeling lost, I felt the need to reinvent myself, so I pierced my nose, changed my style, and started planning out a tattoo. These were the steps I took in helping me find my identity again.

The use of fashion to cope with trauma has helped me, these women and many others to reclaim their identities. It isn’t just for people to know who they are, but it is for them to know themselves better. Each creative choice has a story, a reason for being there. It tells the world something about you, but it proves to yourself you have an identity outside of your trauma. Fashion

Bailey Taylor, Elizabeth Ranno, and Emily Schutz photographed by Editorial Photographer, Taylor Mair