10 minute read
Reaching for the Purple Stars
In August 2023, the Stapleton family packed up all their belongings, and moved their family of five from Virginia to Arizona. This would be the fourth permanent change of station, or PCS the family would have to endure. Mother ShaDarren Stapleton works in the supply department serving in the United State Air Force, something she has done for the past 18 years. As an Airman she knows that PCS is a part of military life. Each year more than 400,000 service members make a permanent change of station, which are orders to move to another base for generally two to four years. But the toll it can take on a family, especially children, can be tough.
“I think this is probably the most challenging PCS,” said father Abram Stapleton, Sr., who is a former service member as well. “The other ones, the kids were pretty young, they had friends, but they were at a young age. Our oldest son Abram Jr. had made friends and connections, so this was harder on him.”
“It’s kind of tough, because you make friends somewhere, and then you move, so they’re like past memories, so now you have to make friends somewhere else,” said Abram Jr., an 8th grader. “It can be difficult trying to fit in.”
Abram Jr. and his two younger sisters Addison and Aubrey have lived in Georgia, Virginia, and Washington, D.C. before moving to Arizona. They’ve attended their fair share of schools over the years. When arriving in Arizona, they were enrolled in Luke Elementary School. What they found when arriving, though, is something a little different. They were assigned student ambassadors upon arrival as part of the Student-to-Student Ambassador Program. Student ambassadors greet students in transition, give them tours of the school, provide information on activities, eat lunch with these new students, and even share information on the local community. Every kid wants to know where the best pizza place is in town, and student ambassadors have the answer.
“I remember it was the last block of the day when my student Ambassador, David, introduced himself to me,” Abram Jr. recalled. “We started playing tic-tac-toe and got in trouble,” he said with a laugh. That was my first memory with him. We both live on base so we would walk home together and talk with each other. That just made us real close. No school I ever went to had this program. You can express your feelings on how deployments are, how moving is, and you get to experience it with other kids who have been through these types of things. This program is really special and good.”
Student-to-Student Ambassadors are provided training, support, and guidance from Luke Elementary School staff as they learn how to welcome and support students who come to the school. And it’s not just military kids, all kids receive an ambassador when they walk through the doors the first time.
“I wanted to try something new, and our Principal Mrs. Sehr offered this position to me,” said Ember
Jackson, who is a 6th grade student ambassador at Luke Elementary. “So I thought it would be a good opportunity for me. So I joined, I went to all the training sessions, I went to all the meetings that we had, and I started to realize that this is a big deal and it is going to change a lot of kids’ lives. I learned how to respond to certain kids, because not everyone has the same reaction when they come to a new school. Some are shy, some are excited, and there are certain ways to deal with each kid.”
“We really work on student ambassador leadership skills and what it means to be a leader not only amongst their peers but be a role model for all students at Luke,” said Kara Sehr, Principal.
Not only do student ambassadors take the lead on assisting students in transition, but also volunteer opportunities, helping to organize Veterans Day assemblies, student of the month recognitions, deployment luncheons, and much more.
“It’s building the idea of one team, one mission, not only among our staff but among our students and among our community,” said Sehr.
Luke Elementary School is situated just outside of Luke Air Force Base walls, and about 2530 percent of their students are military-connected. The Studentto-Student Ambassador program is just one of many programs that the school offers to help support those military kids.
“When I took over as principal of Luke Elementary School, that was one of our goals, to have more base representation to be able to support our students in transition, because it happens so frequently,” said Principal Sehr.
Luke Elementary also has a designated staff member who is a point of contact for military students and families and a dedicated web page with resources for military families. Even with all of these resources, what they didn’t realize though, is that they were only one element short of the requirements to become what is called a Purple Star Candidate School. Luke Elementary didn’t realize they were so close to the designation, because there aren’t any Purple Star Schools in the state of Arizona. They didn’t even know it existed.
When Melissa Rueschhoff, wife of Brig. Gen. Jason Rueschhoff, commander of the 56th Fighter Wing found this out, she made it her mission to bring Purple Star Schools to Arizona.
“My husband and I were at a conference back in May, and we heard that there were only a few states that did not have Purple Star School designations,” she said. “And we were kind of surprised to find out that Arizona was one of those states. So when we came back from that conference in Washington, D.C., we asked ourselves what we could do about this. How can we get this concept right here in Arizona, and then right here in the West Valley, and then right here at Luke Elementary School.”
A Purple Star School Candidate designation indicates that a school is committed to supporting the unique needs for militaryconnected children by providing staff and programs to support students during their school transitions or deployment. Criteria to meet this designation include:
• Designated staff point of contact for military students and families
• A student transition program
• Dedicated web page with resources for military families
• Professional development for staff (70%) that helps familiarize and equip them to support the needs of military students
Luke Elementary took on the challenge of completing that last criteria of professional development for staff, and in an October 6, 2023 ceremony, Luke Elementary School was formally recognized as the first Purple Star Candidate School in Arizona.
Brig. Gen. Jason Rueschhoff articulated the importance of the program at the ceremony.
“I’ve been in the military, if you count my time at school, for almost 30 years,” he said. “Thirty years ago I signed a dotted line. I said I would give my life for my country if that’s required. Military members understand that. We all signed up and said that we will sacrifice for our country. We’ll sacrifice for you, we’ll sacrifice for our friends, our family, for people we don’t even know. But we do that not for thanks. We do that because that is our calling. But what I realized is, I got married later, and I have two kids. And I realized that the sacrifices we ask our families to make are way greater than the ones I’ve had to make, and those in uniform have had to make. They didn’t sign up for that. My wife didn’t sign the line, my kids didn’t either.”
“The story that I heard at that conference, the one that really spoke to me, was about a little girl, and she had just moved with her military family, and it was her sixth or seventh move, and she didn’t have anybody on the first day to each lunch with, because she didn’t know anybody,” said Melissa Rueschhoff. “And so that little girl took her lunch and she went to eat in the bathroom. And that story spoke to me because that exact same thing happened with our daughter, when she moved for the 7th time here to Arizona. Now she has amazing friends, but it would have been so nice on that first day to have somebody to meet up with her and say, let me show you where the lunch room is. Let’s eat lunch together. Let me show you where your locker is or maybe your first class."
While the Rueschhoffs have direct experience understanding the toll a permanent change of station can have on a child, so does Principal Sehr. Her husband, a physical education teacher at Kingswood Elementary School, was also a member of the Air Force Reserve. He deployed to Kuwait when their children were just one and three years old, providing first hand experience for Mrs. Sehr.
“That transition is really hard,” she said. “You are going from having a family unit to being by yourself. Your spouse is overseas. Your kids’ routines are off. As a wife, and I was a working mother during that time, I know for my own kids it was really beneficial to have the people in my life understand that my life just completely turned upside down, but my kids need consistency and support.”
Having staff that understand the process, signs to look out for, and how to support students has been vital in making sure everyone is taken care of at Luke Elementary School. Sehr said parents have been amazing at letting them know they have a deployment coming up, so they can work with the school liaison, staff can be notified, and everyone can be aware that a child’s life is about to change drastically, and they can be there to support them.
“I like the process here, “said ShaDarren Stapleton. “It’s other kids who are going through the same things. Their parents may be deployed. Some of them may not have seen their parents in seven or eight months. So they understand. And the teachers understand too. They know certain things to be on the lookout for. That’s very appreciated when I know adults are paying attention to the signs and can reach out and ask questions.”
Indeed, many of the Student-toStudent Ambassadors are military kids. Ember’s mom serves in the Air Force as well. While Ember has been lucky and her mom has been stationed at Luke Air Force Base her entire time, she still gets the struggles kids go through.
“Since my mom works on weapons, it’s a little more stressful for her,” said Ember. “It’s worrying knowing what she is doing. If we are ever under attack, she is the one that supplies the weapons for the jets. It’s important to know that she definitely has a very big role in what she does. It makes me feel really proud for her, and proud for being her daughter.”
That mentality is also evident in Abram Jr, who also knows that while permanent changes of station aren’t fun for him, it’s supporting something that is bigger than him and his family. Military kids didn’t sign up for this, but in talking with some, they get it.
“It makes me want to set a bar for where I want to be,” he said. “My parents already set that bar and did what they wanted to do serving our country. So now I have to set a bar for myself so I can make them proud, because they already made me proud.”
