Why you must be 'Number One' now more than ever

By Kim Parker, Wellbeing & Transformational Coach

Lawyers commonly strive to be Number One. It's etched into our very being to be high achievers, champion the rights of our clients, gain the edge over the opposition, never quit, be right, do whatever it takes to meet deadlines, meet ever increasing targets, and more. Pressure of work is our badge of honour.

When I was a practising solicitor this was all in a day's work. In my 20+ years of practice, I never met a lazy lawyer.

THE PRESSURE SOURCE

Lawyers as a collective are under more pressure than ever. Amid the changing face of the profession with the official roll out of the Solicitor's Qualifying Exam, the climate change call to adapt to paperless offices and sustainability issues, restructuring of some firms and the need to re-qualify in European countries to better serve clients post-Brexit, and the emergence of freelance lawyers, there are many factors adding to legal practitioners' stress.

Pressure of work alone is huge. The 2021 SDLT holiday and families' desire to acquire homes that could accommodate remote working fuelled the conveyancing boom. According to Government Statistics: UK residential property completed transactions for the financial year 2020/21 (in thousand transactions) were at 889,340. At the time of writing, the provisional estimate for 2021/22 is 1,167,310, a 131% increase! Divorce petitions rose by 7% in April/June 2021 compared to April/June 2020 and the number of decrees absolute was 23% higher than the previous year. There is a backlog of almost 60,000 cases in the Crown Court, and registered company insolvencies in January 2022 have more than doubled. According to the Office of National Statistics, fraud has increased by 36% and computer misuse by 89%. The Bellamy Report 2021 describes a "crisis in morale" in the criminal legal aid system, fees are low and "the sector is standing on a cliff edge."

No matter what your specialist area of practice, the pressure can feel intense!

THE PROBLEM

"Life in the Law", the research study into lawyer wellbeing published by Law Care in September 2021, confirmed the stark truth: • Legal professionals are under strain and have a high risk of burnout • 69% have experienced mental ill health • 1 in 5 have been bullied, harassed or discriminated against at work

This is real. It's out in the open. If you're facing your own demons right now... YOU ARE NOT ALONE. legal career can be highly rewarding, it is also demanding with a heavy workload, long hours, and a culture that deters people from asking for help or admitting they are struggling. This is a systemic failing, which will take both time and will to change.

STRESS

While everything happening in the profession and the outside world is beyond our individual control, each of us experiences stress to some degree.

Stress is necessary for a healthy life. 'Good' stress enhances motivation and performance, can build resilience and immunity, boost brainpower and encourage growth. It helps our body prepare for challenging moments or danger ahead. But only up to a point.

Too much or prolonged stress, 'bad' stress, causes cognitive overload, anxiety and breakdown in the body. Some lawyers feel that they thrive on the adrenalin rush. But there is a tipping point when stress leads to burnout.

You owe it to yourself to take stock of your psychological fitness. If you want to maintain (or regain) optimum health, happiness and performance across all aspects of your life, what can you do? The first step is to notice AND acknowledge your reality.

THE SYMPTOMS

What might YOU be experiencing that indicates you should pay closer attention to your wellbeing?

Signs and symptoms vary from person to person. They can affect emotions, thoughts and behaviour.

Some examples are: poor sleep, low energy, sadness, depression, inability to relax. Relying on stimulants like coffee, or using alcohol or other addictions to 'numb' your senses. Mood swings, anger, changes in eating habits/sex drive, reduced ability to concentrate, anxiety or feelings of guilt. Overwhelm or feeling there's no end in sight, avoidance behaviour, procrastination, making mistakes, withdrawing from friends and activities. Physical problems such as unexplained aches and pains.

Remember, it can happen to anyone.

THE CONSEQUENCES

Impaired mental health can lead to a plethora of unwanted situations from unhappiness to relationship difficulties, social isolation, work issues, financial problems, a weakened immune system or other more serious medical conditions such as heart disease.

STIGMA

There is a lingering stigma attached to seeking help for mental or emotional difficulties. I have noticed that this is particularly prevalent among professionals such as lawyers. Do you fear that being open about your challenges would be perceived as weakness and potentially damage your career?

If so, you'll probably find yourself caught in a vicious circle. A no-win situation. A situation that only worsens over time. Few mental health problems improve by themselves.

More and more people, including high profile personalities (e.g. Prince Harry), are beginning to talk openly about their own mental health challenges. To do so is, of itself, a sign of courage and strength. The world is a better place for that. The more progressive firms offer in-house support services.

Remember the "Call for Kindness" campaign? Launched by Today's Conveyancer in February 2021, predicting the pressure would become unbearable, it implored the housing sector to be kind and calm. It noted that "more and more of our peers have been taking to social media to share their honest opinions of how the current situation is impacting the way we behave, type and speak to each other."

THE SOLUTION

Lawyers generally spend their working hours seeking to meet the needs of those they represent.

But who will help YOU? The answer is in the title: BE NUMBER ONE.

Being "Number One" in this context means putting yourself first. Making a conscious choice to prioritise meeting your own needs. Putting your own (proverbial) oxygen mask on first. This is NOT selfish. Otherwise, you're failing not only yourself but also those around you.

To misquote Rudyard Kipling, “Can you keep your head when all about you are losing theirs?” The way to do that is to become the agent of your own experience of life. It's time to shift the paradigm.

IT'S ALL IN YOU. What can YOU do right now?

BEING NUMBER ONE

IMMEDIATE STRESS RELIEF

If you find yourself triggered or spiralling downwards, these tips can help bring you back to a more resourced state:

Go easy on yourself. Choose to have compassion for yourself and others. The global events of the last two years have been life-changing for all of us!

Give yourself what you need, including professional help if requisite. The free Law Care helpline is open every working day (0800 279 6888) and there are useful resources at www.lawcare.org.uk.

Breathe! How you breathe matters. At any time, you can re-set your nervous system: Stop, pause for a moment, close your eyes, bring your awareness to your body. Take a long deep breath down to your belly, through your nose. Repeat at will.

Move! Stand up if you can, walk, jog, dance or sing your favourite uplifting song, stretch, pull faces, shake your body, massage or tap your neck and shoulders, arms and legs.

If possible, get out in nature. Spend a moment breathing in the fresh air, looking with curiosity at flowers and insects, listening to birdsong, walking with no agenda.

THE SUSTAINABLE APPROACH

Prevention is always better than cure. If you're constantly on the edge or oscillating between coping and not coping, or you're struggling to function effectively, the best that can be said is that you're either battling or limping along in survival mode. This will most likely lead ultimately to burnout. I know how horrible that is!

A better strategy is to lay strong foundations for a sustainably balanced and fulfilling life, so you can minimise the 'down' times and recover from setbacks more rapidly, no matter what is happening around you.

I recommend a structured, supported approach, with an experienced coach such as myself, which will uncover your true vision/purpose, help you develop mindful self-awareness and show that your life is the whole jigsaw puzzle, not just a collection of optional, random, separate pieces. Work is just one of those pieces. Coaching will help you take inspired action and is a supporting structure to help you focus and stay on track, preferably before you desperately need it.

It's so easy to forget what we've created and how far we've come when we only look ahead. Remember to celebrate! You might be amazed what you've achieved, learned and the difference you've made.

In these challenging times, we need now more than ever to connect with that which truly matters. If we look after ourselves, we will make a difference to everyone around us. Sometimes we need a little help along the way. There's no shame in asking for help. On the contrary, it's a sign of courage and dedication to a better world. Your days of being a lone wolf are over.

To discover how "It's all in You", illustrated by Kim's own career path, download your free audio/pdf here:

https://www.kim-parker.com/its-all-in-youaudio/

Biography: Former solicitor, Kim Parker, is an established Law Care helpline volunteer. Since 2009 she has run her successful coaching practice helping professionals around the globe create a fulfilling life and career they love, while being true to themselves. Kim is currently developing The Heart Centre, a beautiful retreat space in rural Herefordshire.