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Dealing with Transition eciding to Leave

DThe decision to leave a church is one of the most difficult decisions that ministers face. Rarely are there clear answers, and conflicts between emotion and reason run high. Considering the seriousness of this decision for both the minister and the church, a decision to move must always be approached carefully with much prayer. Only in very rare cases should resignations come quickly.

Reasons to Consider Leaving

Considering a transition usually comes about through a variety of reasons or situations. It is not unusual for more than one of these situations to be part of the process. Before making a decision to move, be sure that you've honestly evaluated your reasons and motives for considering a transition.

1)You are dissatisfied in your present situation.

2)You have an opportunity to move to a new church.

3)You feel that your ministry in your present church is complete and God is leading you to pursue another ministry option.

4)You are in conflict with the pastor, staff, or members of the congregation. Be aware that conflicts, given time, prayer, and effort can often be resolved, and your ministry may continue for a long time.

5)You may feel a lack of support from the church or pastor. While this lack of support may be financial, it is just as likely that you do not feel valued and recognized for your contributions.

6)You may feel burned-out and are certain that the only way to overcome this sense of helplessness is to start over. While a new ministry opportunity may solve the problem briefly, rarely does relocating solve deep-seated problems. (See the section on "Avoiding Burnout" in Chapter 2).

(7)A final reason for considering a transition may be a change in direction or philosophy in the congregation or in the music ministry. You may feel that you are no longer qualified or able to be effective in this church. Whereas this is a valid and noble reason for searching elsewhere, you should carefully analyze your opportunity to re-tool and grow through this change of direction.

Questions to Consider Before Distributing Your Resumé or Applying for a Transfer

1)Have I accomplished what I felt called to this church to do? If I leave, are there ministries that will not be accomplished? How will my leaving affect ______________? (Fill in the blank with names and situations.)

2)Is my ministry in this church positively affecting people's lives? Once when I eagerly wanted to leave a church over conflicts with the pastor, I asked myself this question and, overwhelmingly, I felt that my ministry in this location was making a positive difference in the lives of many people. I decided to work harder to get along with the pastor and to focus on my real reason for being there — ministry to God's people!

3)Do I feel God has released me from my call to this church? Do I have peace about the prospect of leaving? Do I feel God is guiding my thoughts and feelings?

4)What implications would a move have for my family? How would this move affect my children and spouse (current age of my children, loss of their/our friends, or my spouse's employment)? How will the move affect the way your children view church and how their long-term ideas of church are formed? How do you explain to a child that you are not able to get along well with people or that money is a high priority for you? While these are hard questions, they are worth considering.

5)Are other options available if I resign or distribute my resume? Am I marketable? Can I relocate? Do I need to re-tool or consider further education? What is my age and how will I be perceived as other churches consider me? Will I receive positive recommendations from other ministers and laypersons in my present church?

6)Am I leaving a negative situation without working to overcome it? Have I done my best to reconcile differences? Have I sought the wise counsel of others? Have I consciously sought help to work through personal issues that may contribute to my present situation?

7)What implications would a move have for my future career in church music? Have I been in this church long enough not to create questions concerning my work history? Will this most likely be the last move for me? From my personal perspective, I've declined to move from three different churches when a move seemed to be a good career choice for me. I've always been glad that I stayed for reasons of calling and people instead of career. Exert great caution when career goals are a primary motivation!

8)Is there a pattern in my moving? Do I tend always to move after two years or three years? What does this say about my ministry? Have I moved before because of conflicts with people? Have I moved before because my spouse and family were unhappy? If you see patterns emerging, you must take a concentrated look at them and seek counsel to work on underlying issues before making another transition.

9)If you feel that you're not valued and appreciated, are your ego needs too great for any organization to meet? Ego needs have no place in ministry, and if you are continually feeling unappreciated, then your needs may be too great and your focus in ministry may be inappropriately directed. You should consider counseling to help you develop a proper relationship to self.

10)Can I re-kindle a vision for my current position? Given time, can I learn to dream the dream again in this place? If you can find a spark of hope in this option, give yourself time, distance, and opportunity to create new aspirations. Sometimes re-visioning in your present location is much better than moving. It also saves heartache to your family, is easier on finances, and does not disrupt the ministry in your present position.