2 minute read
Your Brother’s Keeper
How to Be a Great Sibling
The bond between siblings can last a lifetime, but only if we make the effort
Because our siblings were always around when we were growing up, it’s easy to assume they will always be there if we need them to take our side or lend a hand. The reality is that they have their own lives, so we must work to be part of them.
By Bill Lindsey
1 Be There
Our siblings have witnessed most of the important events of our lives; in many cases they know us better than anyone else. As children, they were there when you needed help building a model or learning to play baseball. Now that we’re adults, the games may have changed, but the need for an occasional hand hasn’t. Be the person they can turn to in times of need, grief, and happiness.
2 Let Go of the Past
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Respect Them
Growing up, from childhood to adulthood, can be tumultuous, and sometimes words or actions can cause a rift. Conflicts left to fester may only get worse with the passage of time, as one person decides the other simply doesn’t care. Rather than waiting for them to reach out, be the bigger person and try to mend fences and hopefully start anew; it won’t always work, but at least you’ll know you tried. As adults, it can be hard for older siblings to respect their younger brothers or sisters, as they still see them the way they were as children. If you’re older, acknowledge your younger siblings and their successes, even if it seems they’ve outshined yours. Whether they’ve become astronauts, brain surgeons, or Fortune 500 CEOs, you’re the hero they worshipped when they were kids. Your continued support even now, years later, still means the world.
4 Stay in Touch
Our lives get busier and more complicated as we grow up and become engrossed in our families and careers, making it too easy to wake up one day and realize we’ve lost touch with our siblings. This can happen whether we now live many states away or are still in the same city or town. Send an occasional text or surprise them with a call to let them know you’re thinking of them; it just might make their day brighter.
Trust must be earned and maintained, making honesty the best policy for a strong relationship. Sometimes it may be difficult to accept a sibling’s choices, so be open with them about your feelings to prevent a rift from forming. You don’t necessarily have to agree, but you do need to know why they feel the way they do. This is especially important if one of you is caring for your parents or you’re involved in a family business.