Elysium Literary and Arts Magazine 2013 by Elysium Magazine

C o r al R 10 10 1 S W Miam i, P h o n e: F ax: ( 3 0

eef H ig h S c h o o l 1 5 2 S t r eet F l o r ida 3 3 1 5 7 (3 0 5 ) 2 3 2 -2 0 4 4 5 2 5 2 -3 4 5 4

ELYSIUM LITERARY & ARTS MAGAZINE VOLUME 12: 2013 H u m an s c an o n l y p er c eiv e t h r ee c o l o r s : r ed, b l u e, an d y el l o w . T h ey dan c e in f r o n t o f o u r ey es in airy combinations, reds and oranges that burn in bright flames cooled only by splashes of p u r p l e an d b l u e. O u r p as s io n s f o l l o w s u it . T h ey b u r n s c ar l et w h en a s t o r y l eav es u s h an g in g , turn frosty blue when we read a flowing poem, glow chartreuse at the sight of a great painting. ur life is a blank canvas.

nly art can de ne it.

H an n ah P u s t ej o v s k y E dit o r - in - C h ief

I n s ide: J u r is s a T el l ez , F o i l 1 , Mixed Media

R o des P r in t in g Miam i, F L

C o v er : J u r is s a T el l ez , T o H el l a n d B a c k , Mixed Media h t t p : / / t eac h er s . dades c h o o l s . n et / as c o t t / el y s iu m . h t m

STAFF

EDITOR-IN-CHIEF H an n ah P u s t ej o v s k y

LITERARY EDITORS I s ab el l Man ib u s an T o m m y C h ais u es o m b o o n

ART EDITORS C ar o l in a B eg u ir is t ain D y l an A l v ar ez

LAYOUT EDITOR A n a C h an g

PROMOTIONS MANAGER C h r is t o p h er S p en c er

FACULTY ADVISOR A m y S c o tt

LITERARY STAFF A l ej an dr a D e L a F u en t e A n n m ar ie R as k in D an iel l e C o o g an D er ek A b el l a J o s ie L o b el l o L y n n F an Mat t h ew H en ao N ic k R eed

ART STAFF A l ej an dr D ian a W L ee P iv n Mar t in G R ac h el P

aC y n ik ar en

h in ea n e

g ag l io n e a

LAYOUT STAFF C ait l in L o p ez S o p h ia P adg et t - P er ez

ABOUT US his year s staff consists of twenty two students ranging from four academies and grades . he staff meets every W edn es day af t er s c h o o l as w el l as t w o f u l l w eek s t o w o r k o n l ay o u t s in A p r il . A l l m em b er s ar e in v o l v ed in m at c h in g , proo ng and the creation of layouts.

EDITORIAL POLICY E l y s i um , C o r al R eef S en io r H ig h ’ s an n u al l it er ar y / ar t s m ag az in e s h o w c as es t h e c r eat iv e w o r k o f s t u den t s . T h e literature and art staff udge submissions anonymously. he staff makes selections based on style, distinctiveness of t h em e an d o v er al l q u al it y ; t h e ar t an d l it er at u r e ar e t h en p air ed b as ed o n t h em at ic r el ev an c e.

COLOPHON he staff created volume using dobe n esign . and dobe hotoshop c o m p u t er s . T h e s t af f s el ec t ed C en t u r y G o t h ic f o r t it l es an d C o n s t an t ia f o r b o dy t ext . T h My r iad P r o . T h e 2 0 1 3 edit io n c o n s is t s o f 1 2 4 p ag es w it h in s ide p ag es p r in t ed o n 8 0 l b . g p ag es p r in t ed o n 1 0 0 l b . w h it e l in en . R o des P r in t in g I n c . , l o c at ed in Miam i, F l o r ida, p u b t h e m ag az in e ( al l o f w h ic h w er e dis t r ib u t ed f r ee o f c h ar g e o n a f ir s t - c o m e, f ir s t - s er v ed b

ec o lo s s l is h as is

. on ell desktop v er t it l e w as f as h io n ed in y w h it e p ap er an d c o v er ed 2 0 0 f u l l c o l o r c o p ies o f ).

SPECIAL THANKS W e w o u l d l ik e t o ext en d o u r ap p r ec iat io n t o Mr . S c o t t Mc K in l ey , C o r al R eef ’ s v is u al ar t s t eac h er , f o r h is ar t is t ic g u idan c e an d t o o u r p r in c ip al , Mr s . A dr ian n e L eal , f o r h er c o n t in u in g s u p p o r t . W e w o u l d l ik e t o ext en d f u r t h er t h an k s t o o u r s p o n s o r , Mr s . A m y S c o t t , f o r h er m an y h o u r s o f dedic at io n , adv ic e an d c o u n t l es s b at c h es o f c o o k ies .

AWARDS

MEMBER OF CSPA, NSPA & NCTE’S PRESLM PROGRAM N at io n al C o u n c il o f T eac h er s o f E n g l is h P R E S L M P r o g r am : H ig h es t N at io C o l u m b ia S c h o l as t ic P r es s A s s o c iat io n : A l l - C o l u m b ian : 2 0 0 6 - 2 0 1 2 N at io n al S c h o l as t ic P r es s A s s o c iat io n : G o l d Medal : 2 0 0 6 - 2 0 0 9 , 2 0 1 1 , 2 0 1 2 P ac em ak er F in al is t : 2 0 0 6 A l l - A m er ic an : 2 0 0 6 - 2 0 0 9 , 2 0 1 1 , 2 0 1 2 3 C o l u m b ia U n iv er s it y G o l d C ir c l e W in n er s in 2 0 1 2 I n c l u ded in t h is is s u e: 2 0 1 3 S c h o l as t ic A r t an d W r it in g W in n er s : “ C h in es e- A m er ic an W ar ” b y A n a C h an g : S il v er K ey f o r P o et r y “ J o u r n ey f o r t h e R eb o r n ” b y A n a C h an g : G o l d K ey f o r P er s o n al E s “ A Min o r ” b y C ar o l in a B eg u ir is t an : H o n o r ab l e Men t io n “ D es p air in P et ar e” b y S ab r in a Men do z a: S il v er K ey f o r V is u al A r t Mar t in G ar g ag l io n e: G o l d K ey f o r V is u al A r t s 2 0 1 3 Y o u n g A r t s W in n er s : Mar t in G ar g ag l io n e: F in al is t in V is u al A r t s A u s t in Mo r al es : H o n o r ab l e Men t io n in P h o t o g r ap h y P h o t o g r ap h er F o r u m Mag az in e’ s 3 3 r d A n n u al C o l l eg e & H ig h S c h o o l P h o L ee P iv n ik : H o n o r ab l e Men t io n

n al A w ar d: 2 0 0 8 - 2 0 1 0 , 2 0 1 2

s ay / Mem o ir s

t o g r ap h y C o n t es t

TABLE

CONTENTS B rea k f a s t J o s ie L o b el l o , H aik u

12-13

L i t t l e R ed B a l l o o n Mat t h ew H en ao , P o et r y

38-49

A V i o l en t E x pl o s i o n D an iel l e C o o g an , P o em

14-15

K epl er a n d G a l i l eo D er ek A b el l a, P o et r y

40-41

Pen T a ps D an iel l e C o o g an , P o em

14-15

S c o tt I s ab el l Man ib u s an , P r o s e

42-43

T h e S o n d er H eidi B at is t a, P o em

16-17

V a ra d ero D er ek A b el l a, S p an is h P o et r y

44-45

A m I N o t E n o ug h ? K at r in a G o n z al ez , P o em

18-19

E n t a n g l ed M em o ri es B r u n o O l m edo , P er s o n al E s s ay

46-47

T h e T em pes t N eel an s h u T h ap ar , P o em

20-21

i r n a o a J o an y L am u r , S p o k en W o r d

48-49

D ept h J as m in e D av is , S h o r t P r o s e

22-23

C h i n es e- A m eri c a n W a r A n a C h an g , P o et r y

50-51

I n t erv i ew w i t h a W ri t er T o m m y C h ais u es o m b o o n , I n t er v iew

24-25

M y C h ild J an ay B l ak el y , P o et r y

52-53

M .A .D . L y n n F an , P r o s e

26-27

M o n t e T es t a c c i o P ao l o T h o m p s o n , S h o r t P r o s e

54-55

R ig h t H a n d A n a C h an g , P o em

28-29

I n s i g h t i n t o t h e Ps y c h e J ial in Z h an g , P o et r y

56-57

Y o g urt E m il y Men dez , S h o r t P r o s e

30-31

M et a ph o rs a n d M et a m o rph o s i s athi a raithwaite, oetry

58-59

H a n d s in M o t io n A m y Mel t z er , P o em

32-33

J o urn ey f o r t h e R eb o rn A n a C h an g , P er s o n al E s s ay

60-61

LITERATURE

M a c a b re Mat t h ew H en ao , S h o r t P r o s e

64-65

I n t erv i ew w i t h a n A rt i s t H an n ah P u s t ej o v s k y , I n t er v iew

90-91

M o t h erc l uc k er D er ek A b el l a & A n n m ar ie R as k in , P r o s e

66-67

T h eM o s t I n t i m a t eT h i n g N ic o l e G ar c ia, P r o s e

94-95

A Pro d uc t o f C i rc um s t a n c e N ic o l e G ar c ia, P r o s e

68-69

N a k ed A n n m ar ie R as k in , S h o r t P r o s e

96-97

I t ’ s t h e C em et eri es Y o u D i d n ’ t L i k e E m il y Men dez , P o em

70-71

A C o m m o n S c en e D ean Q u in t an a, P o et r y

98-99

O n T rea d i n g S o f t l y J ial in Z h an g , P o em

72-73

M i n o rR o l e I s ab el l Man ib u s an , P r o s e

100-101

D ri v ew a y Mic h ael L ey t e- V idal , P er s o n al E s s ay

74-75

I n s t rum en t s o f S epa ra t i o n L y n n F an , P r o s e

102-103

M y G ra n d pa ’ s H a n d s J an ay B l ak el y , P o et r y

76-77

H o l l o w ed O ut J ial in Z h an g , P o em

106-107

M y S t rug g l e A g a i n s t t h e Pi a n o N eel an s h u T h ap ar , P er s o n al E s s ay

78-79

T h e V es s el o f L i f e E r in G r ay , P o em

108-109

W h a t S h o ul d I K n o w A b o ut J a z z ? T o m m y C h ais u es o m b o o n , S p o k en W o r d

80-81

T h e W a s h i n g o f F eet J u r is s a T el l ez , P o em

110-111

L a y m a n ’ s T erm s N ic o l e G ar c ia, P l ay

82-83

T o t h e H o ri z o n , B a c k o n S h o re I s ab el l Man ib u s an , P o em

112-113

D ea t h o f D uc k T o l d i n R ev ers e L y n n F an , P r o s e

84-85

W h en I C a m e I n t o E x i s t en c e A n n m ar ie R as k in , P o em

116-117

E n M i B a rri o J an ay B l ak el y , P o et r y

86-87

W h i t e B l a n k Pa g e J er em y C eb al l o , P o em

118-119

W es t ern S ui c i d e L y n n F an , P o em

88-89

D i a m o n d K i t es D av id E r n s b er g er , P o em

120-121

ART

E ra 2 - T h e M a n c t i : T h ey C a m e i n W a v es Mar t in G ar g ag l io n e, A c r y l ic P ain t

34-35

E ra 1 - G rea t T i d e Mar t in G ar g ag l io n e, Mixed Media

36-37

E ra 1 - T w i n H o un d s Mar t in G ar g ag l io n e, A c r y l ic P ain t

36-37

A n a t o m y Y in im i G al eg o , Mixed Media

10-11

E ra 2 - E t h erea l R ev el a t i o n s Mar t in G ar g ag l io n e, A c r y l ic P ain t

36-37

C ry s t a l C r y s t al H am il t o n , Mixed Media

12-13

F in n T ay l o r D av is , A c r y l ic o n W o o d

38-39

F o res t L ea f T h er es a L ee D o v er , A c r y l ic

12-13

S t a rd us t K ael y n C h im a, G o u ac h e

40-41

F o x y B o x y L ee P iv n ik , D o u b l e E xp o s u r e P h o t o g r ap h y

14-15

Pea s i n a Po d Mail e T o r r es , A c r y l ic o n W o o d

42-43

S ub w a y S o p h ia C ab r al , A c r y l ic

16-17

H i d d en U n d er t h e D o c k s D y l an A l v ar ez , D ig it al P h o t o g r ap h y

44-45

18-19

H o t el T i t i l a c a K ar l a I n f an t e, P h o t o g r ap h y

46-47

E n t a n g l ed Y es l ien G ar c ia, A c r y l ic

20-21

In B lo o m A n a C h an g , D ig it al P ain t in g

48-49

U n d erw a t er B ay l ee W at er m an , D ig it al P h o t o g r ap h y

22-23

S po o n N ic o l e S an t iag o , W at er c o l o r

50-51

L y n n L ee P iv n ik , D ig it al P h o t o g r ap h y

24-25

S t ren g t h S il v an a R aidt , A c r y l ic

52-53

H i a l ea h Peel D y l an Mat am o r o s , P h o t o g r ap h y

26-27

I n d i a n G h a ri a l L ee P iv n ik , D ig it al P h o t o g r ap h y

54-55

A H o rs e W i t h N o N a m e D ian a W y n n e, O il P ain t in g

28-29

B l a c k R o s es J u r is s a T el l ez , Mixed Media

56-57

F lo 1 N at h al ie F r an c is , G l u e an d A c r y l ic

30-31

S un s et L a k es D y l an A l v ar ez , D ig it al P h o t o g r ap h y

58-59

A M in o r C ar o B er g u ir is t ain , A c r y l ic an d Mar k er o n My l ar

32-33

F i erc e F l a m e D y l an A l v ar ez , D ig it al P h o t o g r ap h y

60-61

E ra 2 - T h e Pra el eo n : T y ra n t s o f L y n s ud o D es ert Mar t in G ar g ag l io n e, O il P ain t

34-35

Po p S a c C am il a L o h ez ic , K al eido s c o p e P h o t o g r ap h y

62-63

C h ry s l er B ui l d i n g K r is t en F ig u er o l a, I n k o n A l u m in u m

F o il

F lo 2 N at h al ie F r an c is , G l u e an d A c r y l ic

64-65

R o m in a S o p h ia P adg et t - P er ez , P h o t o g r ap h y

96-97

S h a ped M e Y es l ien G ar c ia, A c r y l ic o n C an v as

66-67

Z o d ia c N at h al ie F r an c is , S t il l V ideo

98-99

I n s i d e an d O ut s i d e Mar t in G ar g al io n e, Mixed Media

68-69

D ea n Y es l ien G ar c ia, I n k o n N ew s p ap er

100-101

A l l t h eI f s J u r is s a T el l ez , Mixed Media

70-71

C o n c ret e J un g l e A l ej an dr a C h in ea, W at er c o l o r

102-103

D i s a ppea ri n g C h a i rs A l ej an dr a C h in ea, I n k

72-73

S ta y Y in im i G al eg o

104-105

M i c h a el L ey t e- V i d a l Mar c o L ey t e- V idal , P en c il I l l u s t r at io n

74-75

V ei n Mar ia J o s e A y u s o , C r ay o n an d I n k

106-107

M r. J a m es B l a k el y A m y S c o t t , P h o t o g r ap h y

76-77

Passiflora Corona L ee P iv n ik , P h o t o g r ap h y

108-109

T h e Pi a n o T h er es a L ee D o v er , P as t el

78-79

G o l d en G i rl J u r is s a T el l ez , Mixed Media

110-111

H a i rs t y l es A n a C h an g , D ig it al P ain t in g

80-81

Py ra m i d s Mail e T o r r es , Mixed Media

112-113

S i x t een L ee P iv n ik , P h o t o g r ap h y

82-83

D a n c i n g Q ueen I m an i C am p u z an o - G u ev ar a, Mixed Media

114-115

T ry s t a n S o p h ia P adg et t P er ez , P h o t o g r ap h y

84-85

S ea T urt l es i n t h e S ea A n dr ea A r an a, A c r y l ic

114-115

D es pa i r i n Pet a re S ab r in a Men do z a, C h ar c o al

86-87

R ed J u r is s a T el l ez , A c r y l ic

114-115

T h e G i rl F ro m E l eut h era L ee P iv n ik , D o u b l e E xp o s u r e P h o t o g r ap h y

88-89

K a a per, S h ei k h E l B el ed Mail e T o r r es , Mixed Media

116-117

A W h o l e N ew Po w er a n d C o n t ro l A u s t in Mo r al es , D ig it al P h o t o g r ap h y

90-91

C h a o t i c C o n t ra ri et y Mar c R es t r ep o , C o l l ag e

118-119

M es s y M i n d a n d T h o ug h t A u s t in Mo r al es , D ig it al P h o t o g r ap h y

92-93

Purrpee D y l an Mat am o r o s , D ig it al P h o t o g r ap h y

120-121

R ef ra c t i o n C ar o B er g u ir is t ain , My l ar S c u l p t u r e

94-95

S k et c h b o o k S prea d J u r is s a T el l ez , Mixed Media

122-123

N o s eJ o b C ar o B er g u ir is t ain , A c r y l ic an d Mar k er o n My l ar

94-95

Yinimi Galego Anatomy , Mixed media

C r y s t al H am il t o n , C ry s t a l , Mixed Media

T h er es a L ee D o v er , F o res t L ea f , A c r y l ic

BREAKFAST Josie Lo Bello t an g er in e m o r n in g h o n ey s u n l ig h t dan c in g in y o u r s y r u p y s m il e

A VIOLENT EXPLOSION Danielle Coogan A h —! T h e dam

w o u l d h o l d n o m o r e in s ide h er s o u l

s air flew in, t ward tightened chest met cold awn leap to head as shutter eyes saw dusk motions forced ravines in supple clay brutal stoppage—heart immobile once ut with grandeur, trumpets herald lost rush —

C h o o !

PEN TAPS Danielle Coogan o drum the idle minutes past some more usic sheet of wind and rain and ticking eckon armies far away to battle hythm frantic, sharp as silence on ears on ure harmony to wood and lecture irtuoso sitting thinking in class

L ee P iv n ik , F o x y B o x y , D o u b l e E xp o s u r e P h o t o g r ap h y

S o p h ia C ab r al , S ub w a y , A c r y l ic

THE SONDER Heidi Batista F r o z en an d F l u en t o n l y in a l an g u ag e in c o m p r eh en s ib l e,

T h ey s it o n a w ear y b en c h , dr ain ed

n o o n e u n der s t an ds

F ro m

H av e y o u ev er l aid ey es o n an o t h er ?

W at c h in g eac h in s t an t , h u m an it y p as s es it s el f b y

dr eam s an d af t er t h o u g h t s o f t h o s e b ef o r e

taring into their own reflection,

I n b et w een f r ec k l es ,

o v er an d o v er

p o n der ir r eg u l ar m ar k s o f b eau t y

T h in k in g t o t h em s el v es t h ey ar e n o t h in g al ik e

he pi ie cuts of modern age, the gruff of a modern man Y o u t h w ait in g t o exp l o r e, s t an din g o n t h e l edg e o take off and indulge

I n a m o m en t , t h e p ar al l el l iv es c o u l d al ig n

ge roaring off of tired waves, waiting on the edge

A g es t u r e p av e t h e p at h f o r l o v e,

o take off and rest

A m is h ap c h an g es t h e c h an c e f o r g r o w t h , T h e l as t s eat o n t h e b u s l en ds a n ew h an d f r o m

I n m y c it y o f t r an s ien t s , t o w er s an d t er m in al s

T h e s t r an g er b y t h e w in do w

I s ee t h em

Y et w e b u n dl e u p t ig h t , t h e g at es s af el y c l o s ed

as t h ey p as s b y

taring dully into their murk of early morning coffee, Min dl es s c h at t er in t er s ec t in g p h o n e l in es f o r m il es in b et w een

C o m p l ain in g o n b eh al f o f eac h f r ec k l ed do o r

C r o s s w al k s an d c r o s s in g p at h s n ev er - en din g

S l am s in t h e f ac e o f h o p e an d b eau t y

E ac h b r u s h , eac h g l an c e, is an o t h er o n e l o s t

A s t h e k ey j in g l es r es o n at e in t h e s af et y o f h o m es T h e m ag ic o f l if e it s el f dw in dl es

W ear in g m as k s o f p r o t ec t io n , al l ian c e, in div idu al it y ,

it h ev er y s l ig h t t u r n o f c h eek

Mar k t h eir p l ac e, an d s ay y o u r s il en t n am e T ak es b u t a s ec o n d t o k n o w j u s t w h at y o u ar e:

I f a f eel in g w it h in b eg in s t o b u r s t ,

T h e adv en t u r er s m il in g dev il is h l y in b ac k g r o u n d o f c it y p ic t u r es

a n ag g in g s o m ew h er e deep in s ide

T h e k in d s t an din g in t h e du s t o f o p en do o r s

k n o w t h at o n e w h o p as s es y o u b y ,

the busy hurrying off to meet others who ust want to

r ev eal s a m ag ic , a m o m en t t o r eal iz e,

hurry off

w h en div is io n s div ide, t h e t r u t h is ,

T h e t h in k er s w it h o u t a p l ac e t o g o b u t a m ap

w e al l s p eak t h e s am e t o n g u e al ik e

en g r av ed w it h in T h eir c o m p as s , t h e s o u l

AM I NOT ENOUGH? Katrina Gonzalez T ir ed o f l iv in g t h e w ay I do

S it t in g b ac k an d l o o k in g at w h at I h av e t o l o s e

F o o d s t am p s , c h an g in g w ag es

W el l h ec k , al l I s ee is b o o z e

ll see are different faces T h e t r o u b l e, t h e w o r r y , t h e s c ar ed s t ar es T ir ed o f b ein g w it h p eo p l e

I t ’ s n o t w o r t h it t o b e h o n es t

Mig h t as w el l s ay w h er e I am

h o h av e n o m o t iv at io n B u t r at h er

I n t h e b a r r i o h ar n es s

D is c r im in at io n C o n t am in at io n

I ’ v e g o t f r ien ds h er e I g u es s

A b o m in at io n

Mo r e l ik e a f al s e s en s e o f s ec u r it y in al l t h is m es s L if e j u s t c r u m b l es aw ay ,

T r y s o h ar d t o m o v e u p o n t h at l adder

I dig r es s

N o , n o t t h e o n e y o u t h in k

O p p r es s

B u t r at h er , t h e s o c ial b r in k

B u t n o n et h el es s ,

W ak e u p an d b l in k

I n ev er p r o g r es s

Y o u ’ r e n o t in s y n c C o n f es s P u t t in g m y s el f o u t in t h e l eg al s y s t em J u s t is n ’ t en o u g h

R eas s es s

Jo b to jo b , b o s s to b o s s I t al l j u s t f al l s t o l o s s

S u c c es s

K r is t en F ig u er o l a, C h ry s l er B ui l d i n g , I n k o n A l u m in u m

F o il

THE TEMPEST

Neelanshu Thapar

I s t ar e at m y h an ds : C o l d, H ar d, C al l o u s ed. T h e y ear s o f t o il an d s t r u g g l e H av e l ef t t h eir m ar k . T h e s in ew y m u s c l e an d R u g g ed s k in H av e c o n s u m ed m e.

T h e edg e o f t h e s t o r m H as l o n g dis ap p ear ed, A n d n o w I n av ig at e T h e t em p es t .

B u t t h is is n o t w h o I c h o o s e t o b e. I u n f u r l t h e s ail s , Y es l ien G ar c ia, E n t a n g l ed , A c r y l ic

S t an d t al l an d r eas s u r ed A s I s ear c h f o r t h e h o r iz o n A s I s ear c h f o r c al m

s k ies

A n d s t il l w at er s . I s ear c h f o r m y s el f . 21

B ay l ee W at er m an , U n d erw a t er, D ig it al P h o t o g r ap h y

DEPTH

Jasmine Davis My ear l ies t m em o r y is o f t h e o c ean . old, with long ngers sending chills up my spine, down my shoulders. lue, never ending, and deeper than could have imagined. reali ed its depth and intensity when was dragged down. spent only a day hovering at the surface. t began at the sunrise. watched it, the morning light turning the sky pale shades of pink and yellow, with soft blue skimming t h e edg es . y time ended after sunset.

hen the sky was abla e, like at the edge of the world there was a

great re rising up into oblivion, put out slowly by the nightâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;dark e cept for the stars that scattered the sky. t was then that was pulled into the water. omehow know that should be afraid. here should be a rock in the pit of my stomach. should be thrashing, ghting for my life. ut wasn t. let whatever force it may be tug at my clothes, my hair, and my feet. let it consume me, the only thing felt being the cool water all over.

y eyes closed. nd think at some point, fell asleep.

INTERVIEW WITH A WRITER: LYNN FAN Tommy Chaisuesomboon

L y n n F a n ,a s e n io r g r a d u a t in g w it h t h e c la s s o f 2 0 13 fr o m

t h e I n t e r n a t io n a l B a c c a la u r e a t e a c a d e m y ,p o s s e s s e s a

remarka le talent or ords. Her riting captures a darker reflection o the orld. he collects ords on her alls. L y n n o fte n fe a t u r e s c h a r a c te r s in v a r io u s t y p e s o f r e la t io n s h ip s a n d s e e m s to h a v e th e r e a d e r p r iv y to th e ir c o m p le x c o n n e c t io n s . H e r u n iq u e s t y le o ft e n c o m b in e s p o lit ic s ,a r t a n d s c ie n c e a llu s io n s .

in r s

in ri in

situations that are ust antitheses of what they

ve always had an a nity for words. n fact, can get a little obsessive over them. f read something and see a word don t know, then my ngers are already clicking away. f it s a good word, then write it down on a post it and stick it on the wall. t started with a sheet of paper listing deadlines and login passwords. mail so and so.

dentist appointment. hat type of thing,

the tick of a person that has a love affair with lists and schedules. ow though, it s a mess of disconnected words that ve hapha ardly collected. ike lumpenproletariet. ve been waiting to use that word since last year. don t imagine that it s used outside the ar ist conte t often and least of all in contemporary prose or poetry. et there s some engaging uality about the fatalism that s attached to it. can t help but think it would be interesting to make some type of literary metaphor or allusion with it. r i

r an

s or o i s o

se uality, and dystopian philosophy. usually like to incorporate some hint of redemption too, though, because otherwise everything would ust be stuck in a permanent state of limbo. o o infl

a n

oo s or a

ors

o r o n or

e nitely huck alahniuk.

is words pack more

punch than anything else ve read before. envy that ability to be so visceral with such simple language. omething obno ious, ingy and not uite appropriate for conversation over tea. like how confrontational it is, even with such counter culture sub ects. s for books, aulkner s T h e S o u n d a n d t h e F u r y ranks pretty high for me. t was my rst classic that absolutely de ed all literary conventions no chronological order, no proper grammar, and feverish

o r ri in

m attracted to psychology, and think that s why a good deal of my writing deals with issues associated with it. create characters by fleshing out their ideals and comfort ones, and then giving them

are. gravitate towards themes like materialism,

sentences that spanned entire pages. or a school report, it was the worst possible book selection. think only fully understood the work two years later, when reviewed that essay again. ut stylistically, it opened up all kinds of possibilities. de nitely took a couple of pointers in ambiguity and plot fluidity. here s never one interpretation in writing.

L ee P iv n ik , L y n n , D ig it al P h o t o g r ap h y

W h a t i d ea s o r pi ec es a re y o u w o rk i n g o n ri g h t

p h y s ic al c h an g es an d h o r m o n e l ev el s . A n d t h en

n o w ?

s o m ew h er e t h in g s b ec o m e s t ab l e- j o b , m ar r iag e,

I h av e s o m e v ag u e ideas . T h ey ’ r e t h e w eir d o n es t h at u s u al l y c o m e t o y o u r ig h t b ef o r e y o u f al l as l eep t h o u g h , s o I ’m

n o t s u r e h o w v iab l e o r ar t ic u l at e t h ey

r eal l y ar e. I t h in k I w as do in g m at h h o m ew o r k t h at night, so my mind was lled with trig functions. ine

h o u s e. G o in g do w n , t h at ’ s t h e m id- ag e c r is is . A t t h e v er y b o t t o m

o f t h e c u r v e, t h at ’ s m en o p au s e o r

an dr o p au s e. A n d t h en ev en t u al l y t h at l et s u p , an d y o u r eac h a l ev el o f eq u il ib r iu m . C o n t en t . O n e f u l l c y c l e. P er io d. P u n in t en ded.

f u n c t io n s in p ar t ic u l ar . I t h o u g h t , h ey , s in e c u r v es

L ik e I s aid, it ’ s o n l y a c r az y idea. I t do es n ’ t m ak e

r ep r es en t l if e.

c o m p l et e s en s e. C h an c es ar e if t h e c o m p ar is o n is u s ed,

T h e l in e g o es u p , al o n g w it h o u r em o t io n al o u t p u t , t h e exp an din g b r eadt h o f o u r exp er ien c es , o u r b o dy ’ s

it s only going to be one measly metaphor. omething t o t o s s ar o u n d an d p l ay w it h o n a r ain y day p er h ap s .

M.A.D.

Lynn Fan I n t h is m o m en t , if y o u r eac h ed o u t , an g r y ngers on my proud elbows, we both know d

hungrily savor your entreaty.

hy in this corn eld battle, have we stooped so low, so low, breathing in dirt, and tasting lth

ragged skin smelling of gun powder. our chipped

his delicious

red ngernails lined with grime.

H is t r io n ic isplay of ependency I n t h is m o m en t , if I r eac h ed o u t , a t r u c e

part or mine, we would depart on separate trains, back to back, , north and you, south.

e would

poised on my open mouth, kissed by the flushed

listen to the thudding wheels, dewy eyes set upon

skin of your knuckles and that diamond ring, you d

an empty skyline. ou would catch a dark eye, a

hoot, snicker, and laugh asphy iated.

curling smile on those vintage lips. M i s s , d o y o u

strangled sound

f a n c y a d r i n k , he would say, head a languorous tilt

ike a wet cough

towards the trolley. ou would take to his arms,

ack hack ack ho are we but slovenly mi es of hunger and vice.

hat is your word, but a word, a mere

play of syllables

us but an adventurous memory of romance. would huff a smoke ring, ngers la ily tapping to the people s latest a

fancy. nd with a glass of

burgundy, there would be a toast to us, apart.

hat is my warmth, but a

warmth, a mere suggestion of depravity

f there was but a smidgen of affection on your

O h w h a t a w o n d e r fu l w o r ld .

D y l an Mat am o r o s , H i a l ea h Peel , P h o t o g r ap h y

RIGHT HAND

Ana Chang y o u

an d

w o r k in g t o g et h er fro m

l ef t

t o r ig h t

y o u c at c h in g du s t in y o u r s ides

an d m e ab o v e

t in k er in g

n eg at iv e s p ac e

r u b b in g it f u l l o f i

w h il e y o u

s s ig h

dr ag p ap er y s k in t r ail g r ap h it e an d b u r y o u r m is t ak es in er as er

D ian a W

y n n e, A H o rs e W i t h N o N a m e, O il P ain t in g

s h av in g s

N at h al ie F r an c is , F l o 1 , G l u e an d A c r y l ic

YOGURT

Emily Mendez

e was like conditioner, or midnight, or contact solution, or flat soda, o r y o g u rt. H e w as l ik e w al k in g t o t h e s c h o o l b u s , o r w ak in g u p p as t n o o n o n a S at u r day , o r f al l in g as l eep t o t h e s o u n d o f rain, or taking fteen minutes to get your mascara ust right, o r eat in g y o g u r t . A n d s l o w l y , s h e f el l in l ik e w it h t h e idea o f h im . S h e didn ’ t q u es t io n w h en c o n dit io n er dr ip p ed in t o h er ey es an d s t u n g , an d s h e didn ’ t q u es t io n t h e f ac es s h e s aw o u t o f h er b edr o o m

w in do w at n ig h t . S h e didn ’ t q u es t io n t h e al l er g ic r eac t io n s h e h ad t o h er B io T r u e ( s h e

certainly embraced the blindness it caused , and she didn t uestion the ripe, cloying lm that epsi left in h er m o u t h . o when she opened the fridge and saw only rows and rows of yogurt, this didn t raise a flag she only raised as p o o n . S h e didn ’ t q u es t io n t h e f r iz z t h at m o r n in g h u m idit y l ef t t an g l ed, o r t h e in ev it ab l e t w o o ’ c l o c k w av e o f l o n el in es s . S h e didn ’ t q u es t io n t h e n ig h t m ar es t h at t h u n der g av e h er , o r t h e p er s is t en t , h eav y b u r n in g t h at R ev l o n l ef t in h er ey es . asted away on off white nothingness, by the time he had worked up the courage to say nothing at all, she was reeling, ust drunk and sedated enough to say yes.

C ar o l in a B eg u ir is t ain , A M i n o r, A c r y l ic an d m ar k er o n m y l ar

HAND

S IN M

OTION

Amy M

eltzer

H is w at c h ec h o es

T h eir ey es g az e.

T ic k - T o c k

P it t er - P at t er .

H is s h in y l o af er s s k id ac r o s s t h e as p h al t

T h eir in t er t w in ed h an ds dis m is s t h e p el t in g r ain .

T ic k - T o c k , T ic k - T o c k

P it t er - P at t er . P it t er - P at t er .

H is b r ief c as e s w ay s t o t h e r h y t h m

o f t h e h an ds

T ic k - T o c k , T ic k - T o c k . T ic k - T o c k . H is c l o c k n ev er s t o p s .

H er s t il et t o s s t r u t . C l ip - C l o p . isions of iridescent waves flicker across her c o n s c ien c e. F l ip - F l o p . F l ip - F l o p . T h e ab r u p t s u b w ay do o r s exp u n g e h er t h o u g h t s

T h eir s h o u l der s r ec l in e, l ig h t er t h an f eat h er s . P it t er - P at t er . P it t er - P at t er . T h eir c l o c k b r o k e 2 6 y ear s ag o .

O u r v o ic es g ig g l e. H eh e. W e s eal t h e c r ev ic es o f o u r s h o es w it h l im b er p l ay do u g h . H eh e, H eh e.

j u s t as q u ic k l y as t h ey c am e.

T w o in c is o r s w ig g l e w it h ev er y m u n c h .

C l ip - C l o p . C l ip - C l o p . C l ip - C l o p .

H eh e, H eh e, H eh e.

H er c l o c k n ev er s t o p s .

O u r c l o c k s j u s t h av en â&#x20AC;&#x2122; t s t ar t ed.

MARTIN GARGAGLIONE

E ra 2 - T h e Pra el eo n : T y ra n t s o f L y n s ud o D es ert , O il P ain t

E ra 2 - T h e M a n c t i : T h ey C a m e i n W a v es , A c r y l ic P ain t

E ra 1 - G rea t T i d e, Mixed Media

E ra 1 - T w i n H o un d s , A c r y l ic P ain t

E ra 2 - E t h erea l R ev el a t i o n s , A c y l ic P ain t

T ay l o r D av is , F i n n , A c r y l ic o n w o o d

LITTLE RED BALLOON Matthew Henao

l it t l e r ed b al l o o n , y o u b r eak m y ear s w h en r u b b ed s c r at c h in g n ail s o n b es t b u y c ar ds , al u m in u m

s c r ew s in a b l en der ( o n s m o o t h ie) b an s h ee- es q u e

y o u s t ic k u p m y h air s w h en r u b b ed p er c h edâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;m

eer k at s t r aig h t ,

c o c k r o ac h - an t en n ae w ide al f al f a- es q u e

y o u r u b m e t h e w r o n g w ay l it t l e r ed b al l o o n .

K al ey n C h im a, S t a rd us t , G o u ac h e

KEPLER AND GALILEO Derek Abella A s tro n o m y. apping constellations of obscure gures I n h er ey es [ t h ey s eem

h az el ] .

A b ad r o m an t ic c o m edy . C l am m y h an ds g r as p an o t h er l ik e F eeb l e m o l l u s k s . T en t ac l es t r em b l e. H er l ip s s w el l , at t ac h in g t o m in e, t as t in g an d t ak in g it al l aw ay . L u s h . P lu s h . My ey es o p en . L ip s m eet em p t in es s . S h e is n o t t h er e. Mir ag e. F an t as y . G az e u p w ar ds . S t ar s s p ec k l e m y ey es â&#x20AC;&#x201D; S u g ar - c o at ed p u p il s s ear c h in g F o r c o n s t el l at io n s an d t h o s e l ip s . E n dl es s g al axy . E c s t as y .

Mail e T o r r es , Pea s i n a Po d , A c r y l ic o n w o o d

SCOTT

Isabell Manibusan p al e s k in v is ib l e t h r o u g h t h e w at er . ( t h o u g h it w as dis t o r t ed) i f eel t h e c u r r en t s o f h is k ic k s c ar es s m y b o dy ; c ar es s t h e p o o l w al l . h e em er g es w it h a s l ig h t g as p an d s h iv er s . s c h l u c k . n o w w it h s w im m in g g o g g l es p er c h ed atop his head, and arms crossed over his chest in a futile effort to conserve warmth. he g az es at m e. i s t u dy h is s h iv er in g b o dy an d t h e s u n em er g es f r o m

b eh in d t h e c l o u ds . i

r el is h t h e n ew f o u n d w ar m t h an d s u b m er g e m y s el f s l o w l y u n der w at er . a b ee s t r u g g l es t o es c ap e. l et h ar g ic w av es o f dead g n at s ar e s w ep t in t o t h e g r o o v e w h er e u s ed b an d- aids , h air , an d o t h er il l - f at ed b u g s c o l l ec t . g l u g g l u g . an d t h ey â&#x20AC;&#x2122; r e g o n e. h o t as p h al t o n m y f eet . c o o l s h aded c em en t . then the cheap laminate floor of an elevator. water pools at my feet. t h e do o r is s l o w t o c r eak o p en , b u t i s q u eez e t h r o u g h . he keeps floss on his nightstand along with a sewing machine and an alarm clock rarely u s ed) . i c o l l ap s e o n t o h is m at t r es s an d s in k in . t em p u r p edic , h e t el l s m e. as i l ay t h er e i watch him busily e it and re enter the room. he dgets with a knick knack or two, s et t l es , t h en m o v es ag ain . an d i l ay t h er e t h in k in g o f s o m eo n e el s e, as h e w as dis t r ac t in g himself from an entirely different someone else. i close my eyes and listen to the nervous fleeting footsteps that echoed in my heart.

VARADERO Derek Abella L a v iej a. L a m adr e. P ar ada en u n a p l ay a er o s io n ado p o r l a m u er t e. E l s u el o —p

á l ido . F r í o .

H in c h ado s er an s u s p á r p ado s de c o l o r es c ar l at a, em b u t ido s c o n l á g r im as s al adas y ar dien t es . esde este sitio, observ a su hi o escapando en una flotilla oscura. A l N o r t e. E s t e n iñ o , h o m b r e p o r f u er a p er o j u v en il p o r den t r o . A t r ap ado p o r l a p r o t ec c ió n de s u m adr e, l a v iej a s an t a, p ar ada en l a o r il l a. l una era dom stica con alma silvestre. B u s c an do l ib er t ad, s e em b is t ió al c h an c e. S e t ir ó al m ar . L a m adr e, v ien do t o do , l o s ig u ió . S e h u n dió . F u e m at ada p o r l o s t ib u r o n es de s u T r is t ez a. F u e c o n s u m ida p o r l o s dem o n io s del C ar ib e. S o l am en t e h ay c en iz as . A l N o r t e. T h e o ld w o m a n . T h e m o th e r. S ta n d in g o n a b e a c h e r o d e d b y d e a th . he floor

pale. old.

S w o lle n w e r e h e r s c a r le t e y e lid s ,s a t u r a t e d w it h s a lt y a n d b u r n in g t e a r s . rom this place she o ser ed her son escaping on a dark flotilla. T o th e N o rth . his oy man on the outside ut u enile ithin. rapped y his mother s protection the old saint standing on the shore. H im : a d o m e s t ic a te d b e a s t w ith a w ild s o u l. S e a r c h in g fo r lib e r t y ,h e c h a r g e d a t t h e c h a n c e . H e t h r e w h im s e lf in t o t h e s e a . he mother seeing all ollo ed him. he sank. he as killed y the sharks o her S a d n e s s . S h e w a s c o n s u m e d b y th e d e m o n s o f th e ari

ean.

T h e r e a r e o n ly a s h e s . 44

T o th e N o rth .

D y l an A l v ar ez , H i d d en U n d er t h e D o c k s , D ig ial P h o t o g r ap h y

ENTANGLED MEMORIES Bruno Olmedo em o r ies c l in g t o m y h an ds , t en der l y

left,

cuffed around my wrists, readily

t r ag ic , m is er ab l e at b es t , y et h is s m il e r adiat ed

available for when

the contagious bliss of a truly happy man. hose

need them.

P eo p l e s ay t h at t h e b r ac el et s l o o k t ac k y , t h at wear too many, but no one understands the necessity of the memories they evoke. one understands that within every and

lament

ber lies the chronicle of my life.

wrists are a novel, and

o y

am the protagonist.

ne bracelet—modest, black, with a beautiful blue orb—is from a street vendor. was waiting for my parents to pick me up from outh each when the bracelet caught my eye. didn t have enough money, but the elaborate

is life was

last words remain engraved in that bracelet. A c o u p l e o f y ear s b ef o r e t h at , m y c o u s in entrusted me with a red, yellow, and green b r ac el et in t h e m ids t o f a c h ao t ic ep is o de o f my life.

hey re the colors of the

olivian

flag, she struggled as tears gently kissed her cheeks, so that you never forget where you come from, no matter what happens after this.

looked at her face, blurred by my own

tears, knowing it could be the last time we see each other.

er mouth uivered. he let

out a soft sob and walked away, leaving the

style of the vendor s creations spelled out a

bracelet tightly wrapped around my wrist.

man whose story was worth hearing. nstead

pon false accusations, my family was chased

of bargaining,

sat ne t to him and listened.

“ V en ez u el an , ” h e s aid in S p an is h t h r o u g h a vaguely yellow smile, proud.

out of olivia by the government when fourteen.

ene uelan and

e had been a successful entrepreneur

in ene uela until have came into power.

bribes,

was

fter a few white lies and harmless made it to ra il. or four days my

father was nowhere to be found.

y mother was

in c o h er en t , dr u g g ed in t o o b l iv io n t o av o id t h e

lost everything he worked for—his home, his

panic attacks that haunted her. ll could do

business, and his family—but was lucky enough

was watch as everything around me collapsed

to make it to

violently.

iami with a rusty bag slung

across his back and a few dollars in his pocket. liked him a lot.

aybe it was the ease

and brutal honesty in his words or maybe it was how disturbingly similar his story was to mine. ake the bracelet, son, he said to me as

nd live your life with passion.

tripped of all our belongings, we

started over. he bracelet is worn out but beautiful, tired but still strong. very loose end has been held down with nail hardener and re, and

K ar l a I n f an t e, H o t el T i t i l a c a , P h o t o g r ap h y

adv en t u r es o n a s h ip w it h p il l o w s , an d o f m y s t er io u s

b r eak u n der an y c ir c u m s t an c es . T h is b r ac el et h o l ds

exp edit io n s in t o t h e deadl y f o r es t in m y b ac k y ar d.

an d ev er y k n o t h as b een

t ig h t en ed, u n w il l in g

t o u g h t im es , b u t it al s o h o l ds s t r en g t h an d c o u r ag e. S in c e m y

c o u s in

u s ed t o

o w n

t h e b r ac el et ,

t h e s t o r ies it c ar r ies g o

b ac k

f u r t h er t h an

T h e b r ac el et

w it h

m em o r ies

b u t al s o

m in e.

Mo v in g o n w as n o t eas y . I t s t il l is n ’ t , b u t t h is s im p l e b r ac el et h o l ds al l t h e s u p p o r t I n eed. I t r em in ds m e o f

o f p ain ,

w h at I ’ v e b een t h r o u g h , an d o f h o w s t r o n g I c an b e.

o f c h il dh o o d l au g h t er . I t t el l s s t o r ies o f

“ T ac k y , ” t h ey s ay , “ t ac k y an d w eir d, ” b u t I j u s t

g r an d b at t al io n s

w o v en w it h

w o o den

s w o r ds , o f g r eat

s m il e b ec au s e t h ey do n ’ t u n der s t an d.

A DIFFERENT SHADE OF BLACK Joany Lamur

I w as b o r n in H is p an io l a

myself turned to the pages of books

t o p ar en t s w it h b ig dr eam s .

eeking comfort but nding instead knowledge.

A n d w h en t h eir dr eam s g r ew t o o g r eat

y tiny voice found its way into the classroom,

to t the tiny island,

t rst a vibrato, but later strong and steady.

hey came to merica he land of opportunity.

ut high marks and accolades only translated to cold shoulders and isolation.

pportunity, synonymous to education,

ntelligence—the newest fabrication—now distanced

t was here where discovered my true shade.

m ef r o m

wasnt a legit black.

B u t t h e b l am e w as b o t h o f o u r s t o b ear

ee — was a trickster,

o t h er s

or intelligence was and is a double edged sword

wolf who wore a melanin sheepskin

or them a tool of alienation, for me—

hose telltale tongue told the immigrant s story.

n escape from past sub ugation.

was a pseudo neo uasi shade of black. abels are a funny thing irl you know you ve got that

ou know you ve got that aitian

fter a while you start believing them .

had been black, had been white

was bombarded with accusations of the sort,

nd now may be gray

oo young to know that past racial ideology

eneath my black skin can still feel the white paper

ad been reincarnated.

patches with sticky residue,

t had morphed into the taunts of youngsters

have become a collage.

hose ancestors it once tormented. have spent so long playing a role triving to assimilate, wrestled with the foreign tongue, astered the s, con uered the rs, indoctrinated the ings, nly to proclaim my victory in white

nglish.

had hoped that enunciation would catapult me into full

forgot that black is a birthright rather than a gift lack is not limited to frican mericans. lack describes a people scattered across the globe y the forces of history.

lackdom ut lack and only grew more estranged

lack does not de ne those it used to describe.

o as my peers turned their backs to me

here can be no foreclosure on identity.

A n a C h an g , I n B l o o m , D ig it al P ain t in g

CHINESE-AMERICAN WAR Ana Chang H av e y o u eat en ? is t h e s t an dar d g r eet in g b et w een m y g r an dm o t h er an d h er f r ien ds . I t is n o t a n as al l y n i h a o l ik e t h e Man dar in s ’ . W e did n o t g et t h e m em o an d w e r em ain h ic k p eas an t f ar m er s as k in g eac h o t h er if w e h av e eat en , l ef t dec ades b eh in d in a w ar an d s p eak in g a dial ec t n o o n e k n o w s b u t u s . T h e A m er ic an s look at me with gun re eyes. hey as k , “ H o w do y o u s ay t h i s in C h in es e? ” an d I am

s t r u c k s il en t b ec au s e I n ev er l ear n ed

t h e w o r ds f o r p u ddin g s an d p o et ic s t h e w ay o t h er s did. T h e w ar l iv es w it h m e. I t s t ar es o u t t h e w in do w w h en t h e do o r b el l r in g s , it l is t en s t o m y g r an dm o t h er s o b b in g in h er s l eep , it c o w er s b ef o r e s t r o n g m en j u g g l in g b o m b s in t h eir h eads , an d it h ear s t h e v o ic e in t h e t el ep h o n e as k in g if I h av e eat en .

N ic o l e S an t iag o , S po o n , W at er c o l o r

S il v an a R aidt , S t ren g t h , A c r y l ic

MY CHILD

Janay Blakely

still feel his ngers. can still see his eyes, glassy and cold, as they search mine for comfort, yet the most my night time skies can offer is a shield from hunger, that relentless companion perpetually at his side.

can still feel the cold ngers of my dying child lying in my continent. he cries of my children flood my soul til feel might drown in their sorrows. heir tongues wildly unleash praises to a god m not sure hears them but how can he not when they scream so loud.

heir pleas piercing my soul.

y rivers running crimson from spilled blood forming one sea, deep. he drums of war sounding. t s almost as if they live to die but in the freedom of death they begin to live.

omebody save my child, help him to flee.

scape the bullets that rain

through me like bombs over aghdad. remember what we once had peace and prosperity.

ut now it s time to

leave before beautiful brown skin is bruised black by lies and deception atred becoming a deadly infection.

illing them all off one by one and

it will not stop until the ob is done.

o someone please.

or the love of od, someone save my child, someone save him. nd if there is time after you flee, would you mind coming back ould you mind saving me 53

MONTE TESTACCIO Paolo Thompson

T h ey c am e w it h h am m er s an d axes an d dr il l s

a now distant memory and stepping off the painted

an d p ic k s , an ar m y s w ar m in g in an d ar o u n d a

ceramic, he is free. H e w al k s o n dir t n o w du l l an d l is t l es s

g an g r en o u s w o u n d o n t h e s ide o f dear Mo t h er

compared to the ction of his former reality. he

arth, eager to plait her flesh into flights of fancy. t h o u s an d h an ds eac h t o o k a p iec e o f h im , dis t u r b in g

p ain t t h at f al l s aw ay is r ep l ac ed b y c l o t h es t h at

t h e h ar m o n y o f t h e b l u e an d b l ac k v ein s t h at r an

climb unto his body and tighten like a vice.

across his now immolated e terior.

m o v em en t s b ec o m e r h y t h m ic , s im p l er , as h e l o s es

H e b ec am e t h e w h o r e o f a g en er at io n , dr es s ed

his wanderlust. n that spot where wilderness

an d p r es s ed an d p l ac ed o n a r ais ed dais , s u p p o r t ed

g r u dg in g l y g iv es w ay t o h ar den ed dir t , u s u r p ed b y

by do ens of his cousins in miniature.

t ar an d as p h al t a f ew m et er s f o r w ar d, h e l ear n s t h at

e stands now

like a mirror framed in arti ciality that could never scream or rela into its shape.

e reflects only what

all is not golden under the sun. C o n f r o n t ed an d c o n f o u n ded b y h is r eas o n

they want to see, the amphora to be lled by the

f o r exis t in g in t h is m o m en t ar y et er n it y , h e deem s

day s rain.

himself unworthy of a world he fails to understand.

T h e s u n c o m es o u t ; h e is dis m is s ed as ir r el ev an t

H e t u r n s t h e h an dl e t h at h as ap p ear ed b ef o r e

and promptly discarded. ut his heart lingers and in

him, floating in midair, nally opening the door of

r es en t m en t h e c l aw s h im s el f o u t o f t h e b ac k r o o m

blissful none istence.

o f

L ee P iv n ik , I n d i a n G h a ri a l , P h o t o g r ap h y

J u r r is a T el l ez , B l a c k R o s es , Mixed Media

INSIGHT INTO THE PSYCHE Jialin Zhang

T o er as e t h e p as t is n o t

I f er as ed,

P o is o n o v er c am e u s

f o r t h e f ain t o f m in d,

ag ain t h is s c en e w il l

in o u r G ar den ;

ll itself again

f o r t h e w eak ,

w e f el l t o l es s er m en

w it h h u m an do w n f al l s

t o l es s er b ein g s ;

an d s t r u g g l e;

w e f el l in a c o n s t an c y

m en w il l f al l ag ain ,

m ir r o r ed o n l y b y s t eady

t h eir w o u n ds l eak in g

w at er r ip p l es ,

t h eir l if eb l o o d w h ic h s eep s ,

f adin g aw ay w it h t im e,

s eep s in t o t h e ear t h b el o w ,

dis ap p ear in g f r o m

f eedin g it w it h

needing magni cation

t h at w h ic h o n c e p o w er ed

t o b e s een ag ain .

o r t h e h eav y - h ear t ed. R at h er , t h e t as k l ies in s t ead w it h t h o s e w h o p o s s es s p u r e m ig h t , en o u g h t o p u l l t h e h eav y b r u s h o v er p as t ag o n ies an d des p air s ,

p l ain s ig h t

a m an ,

an d r ais e a n ew c u r t ain

t h at w h ic h p o w er s al l m en ,

T h u s t h e p r o c es s

m ak in g t h e ear t h s t r o n g

r ep eat s it s el f

in p l ac e o f o u r s el v es .

as w e

t o t h e s t ag es o f l if e. Y et ,

f al l

b r u t e b r aw n c an n o t W

o v er c o m e t h e t as k

o r l ik el y n o n exis t en t ,

f al l

w h ic h r el ies al s o o n

an c ien t s o f t im es l o n g p as s ed

w it h n o b o t t o m

s t r en g t h o f m in d.

l iv ed in c h ao s ;

in - s ig h t .

r el ies al s o o n t h e ext en t

c o n f u s io n an d dis c o r d an d dis as t er

t o w h ic h t h e s c en e h o l ds

r an g in t h e p u r e air ,

true to those who rst built it.

t h at is n o w t o xic .

h en w e w er e y o u n g ,

an d

D y l an A l v ar ez , S un s et L a k es , D ig it al p h o t o g r ap h y

METAPHORS AND METAMORPHOSIS Nathifia Braithwaite

W e ar e m o u n t ain s . S o l id is t h e air w e b r eat h e.

e are cold on the outside, but our hearts are lled with pumping blood. nhaling the cold, e haling the warmth. rading places and searching for a common ground.

A n in v is ib l e l in e div ides u s .

hope to see the day when the weather will clear hen we can breathe and the atmosphere between us will balance.

W e ar e m o u n t ain s aiting to be moved.

JOURNEY FOR THE REBORN

Ana Chang

h e g r u n g y b l u e T o y o t a p r ic k ed m y t h r o at w it h

did.

c ig ar et t e s m o k e an d s t ag n an t air . T h e s u n l ig h t

t h e w eek en ds , b ef o r e h e l ef t t o w o r k . D es p it e l iv in g

s p il l ed f r o m

t o g et h er , m y p ar en t s an d I h av e an es t r an g ed an d

t h e w in do w s an d b ak ed t h e f r o n t

o f m y ar m s . S t ic k y s il en c e c l u n g t o o u r s k in . My f at h er

n eu t r al r el at io n s h ip w h er e w e n ev er t al k t o eac h o t h er

turned the radio knob, washing off with ill

b ey o n d “ h i” o r “ g o o d m o r n in g ” .

ithers

“ J u s t t h e T w o o f U s ” . A m el l o w v o ic e dr if t ed in t o

ur rst and only conversation happened on that sun scorched unday.

t h e r if t . I s t ar ed o u t t h e p as s en g er w in do w . T h e s u b u r b an

e talked about trees and

n o t h in g p er s o n al . T h at w as f o r b idden t er r it o r y in o u r

j u n g l e r o l l ed p as t , an im p r es s io n is t p ain t in g o f b r ig h t

f am il y , a c r ip p l ed an d u n r ec o g n iz ab l e s h r u b w e dr eaded

g r een s an d s u n n y g r ay s . I c o n t en t ed m y s el f w it h

to look at. n darker days, d wanted to scream and melt

trying to carve into memory the fleeting houses and

in t o s o b s an d s h r iek s , an y t h in g t o g et r id o f t h e f eel in g

overgrown greenery, though knew d forget them a

o f b ein g al o n e. I k n ew , t h o u g h , t h at t h is w r et c h ed is o l at io n w as

s ec o n d l at er . he car slid to a stop.

red sign flashed into

t h e r eap in g o f w h at I h ad s o w n . I s h o u l d h av e t r ied

v iew . T h e s o n g en ded; t h e s il en c e s m ir k ed at o u r c l o s ed

t o b r eak do w n t h e b ar r ier s b et w een u s , c r o s s s o c ial

mouths and resumed its stifling torture.

boundaries and shout out to the wind that didn t care,

y father gave in rst.

na, do you see that tree

o v er t h er e? ” h e as k ed, v o ic e s l o w an d c al m , c u r v ed b y an ac c en t . H e p o in t ed h is l iv er - s p o t t ed h an d t o t h e t r ee

t h at I w as s t r o n g er t h an w h at y ear s o f r ec l u s io n h ad m ade o f m e. I n s t ead I s m il ed at m y f at h er at t h e en d o f t h e

in q u es t io n , a p r o u d m o n s t r o s it y o f t w is t in g l im b s an d

dr iv e. I m et h is c l ear ey es w h ic h I c o u l d r ead n o b et t er

h an g in g t en dr il s .

than a stranger s and said,

oodbye, daddy.

H e s m il ed b ac k an d r ep l ied in h is s o f t v o ic e,

“ Mh m . ” hat s a g tree, he said. t gives fruit in the s p r in g an d in t h e f al l . ” H e p au s ed b et w een w o r ds , m en t al l y t r an s l at in g f r o m

C h in es e t o E n g l is h . H is

b r o w s f u r r o w ed w h il e h e t h o u g h t , as if t h e s u n w er e

ye, na. I c l o s ed t h e c ar do o r an d r een t er ed t h e em p t y h o u s e. T h e m em o r y c o m es t o m e n o w as o n e o f m an y

t o o b r ig h t . T h e c l ar it y o f h is ey es an d t h e l au g h t er l in es

w h at - if s , as o n e o f t h e b en ds o f t h e r iv er o f m y l if e

ar o u n d h is m o u t h g av e h im

w h ic h v eer ed s o u n p r edic t ab l y in t o t h e u n in v o l v ed. I

a g en t l e air , a k in d f ac e t h at

c o u l d n ev er h o l d an g er o r h at r ed. “ A n d t h at t r ee o v er t h er e, ” h e c o n t in u ed, “ l o o k s

c an c l o s e m y ey es an d im ag in e: m y f at h er l au g h in g in t h e b r ig h t s u n l ig h t , g l it t er in g g o l d an d g r een s c en er y

like a small coconut tree. t s a cycad, and it doesn t

rustling behind him while laugh alongside him.

g iv e c o c o n u t s ! ” H e c h u c k l ed, c h ec k in g t h e s t r eet s

j o u r n ey o u t t o t h e u n dis c o v er ed w il der n es s o f A m er ic a;

b ef o r e c o axin g t h e c ar f o r w ar d.

g o o n c r az y r o ad- t r ip s t o n ear l y - ab an do n ed din er s

h, really

asked. rees didn t interest me

at al l , b u t t h at m y f at h er k n ew s o m u c h ab o u t t h em

e had always only e changed greetings on

w it h c h ec k er b o ar d s ig n s ; dr iv e t h r o u g h ar id des er t s and edland forests.

e search for l

orado past the

D y l an A l v ar ez , F i erc e F l a m e, D ig it al P h o t o g r ap h y

v al l ey s o f t h e G r an d C an y o n an d l au g h as w e c r o s s t h e

w it h t h e an g r y s t r o n g m an , t h e en l ig h t en ed, an d

b o r der t o C an ada. I t ’ s a j o u r n ey o f dis c o v er y , w e c o u l d

t h eT V . W

s ay , a j o u r n ey f o r t h e r eb o r n .

dar k n es s an d t el ev is io n l ig h t , dail y r o u t in e in v aded

h il e I w as c au g h t in t h e b at t l e b et w een

R eal it y s p it s o n m y im ag in at io n .

m y b o dy an d f o r c ed m e t o m o v e ev en as m y m in d

A n al t ar g r eet ed m e h o m e. P ain t ed g l o s s y s t at u es

s t ay ed o n t h e dr iv e h o m e.

t h e t o p s h el f . T h e w ar g en er al ’ s

cradled the memory of the rst conversation

b eet - r ed f ac e g l o w er ed w h il e B u ddh a s m il ed dr u n k en l y .

w it h m y f at h er as a s m al l s eed in m y h ear t . I t j o in ed

slid off my shoes and stumbled into the living room.

t h e o t h er m em o r ies o f v ag u e, s m al l s m il es an d l ig h t

s t ar ed do w n at m e f r o m

T h e T V c h at t er ed en dl es s l y in C h in es e I c o u l dn ’ t

t o u c h es o n t h e w r is t g iv en t o m e b y m y m o t h er an d

u n der s t an d an d t h e af t er n o o n g l o w dim m ed t o a dar k

m y g r an dm o t h er .

p o o l o f s h ado w an d g r ey l ig h t . My g r an dm o t h er w as o u t in o u r f o r es t o f a g ar den , t en din g t o h er c r o p s an d t r ees . I w as al o n e in t h e h o u s e

May b e o n e day t h ey w o u l d g r o w in t o l o v e. aybe one day they would become a g, proud and def o r m ed, an d b ear t h e f r u it o f o u r s il en t s t r u g g l e.

POP SAC

A Photographic Series by Camila Lohezic here s a eeling get in my mouth hen kno

m a out to all into this metaphysical arely

literal and completely metaphorical hole. his hole

all into is represented y my photos

and the eeling get prior to the all is in my mouth popping sacs o metal. his leak and the seeping o the sac s contents is hat lets me kno

am a out to e perience the same emotions

my art gi es me.

T h r o u g h b u ild in g m y o w n o r ig in a l k a le id o s c o p e s a n d d ir e c t in g b r ig h t lig h t s t o it ,t h e reflections and re ractions o light rom the crystals inside create images that ha e elie e to e a uni ue uality o

hat

lending the ore mid and ackground into one composition

so a stract or hich ha e to credit ature. simply set the stage or the phenomenons o light to ork and assist in the making. 63

N at h al ie F r an c is , F l o 2 , G l u e an d A c r y l ic

MACABRE

Matthew Henao I t w as dar k . T h e o n l y s o u n ds in t h e c l as s r o o m t o c k s o f t h e c l o c k an d t h e h u m

w er e t h e t ic k o f t h eA / C .

I w as al o n e.

n ec k o n t h e w al l , s m ear in g m y b l o o d ev er y w h er e. My b l o o d g u s h ed o u t o f m y r aw o p en in g as h e p r es s ed m y w o u n d o v er an d o v er ag ain o n t h e w h it e

S u dden l y , t h e do o r b u r s t o p en an d in t h ey

c an v as o f t h e w al l . H e s p o k e in an al ien t o n g u e

c am e. I didn ’ t dar e m o v e an in c h . I t didn ’ t h el p .

t h at t r an s l at ed in t o t h e w ar p ed s y m b o l s o f an

O n e o f t h em

an c ien t s c r ip t I c o u l d n o t an d w o u l d n o t c ar e t o

f o u n d m e in m y p l ac e n ext t o t h e

o t h er s , l ean in g ag ain s t t h e w al l . H e p ic k ed m e

u n der s t an d. A f t er w h at s eem ed l ik e day s , h e p u t

up and, slowly, with both—my life flashed before

m y h ead b ac k o n an d t h ey l ef t t h e r o o m , t u r n in g

m y ey es . I s aw t h e f ac t o r y an d r em em b er ed h o w I

off the lights as they went, leaving me alone in the

w as al w ay s w o n der in g w h ic h b o x I w o u l d en d u p

dar k y et ag ain . T h e air r eek ed o f a l o w o do r l ef t b y

s l eep in g in n ext an d t h e t im e I w as t ak en b y a s et

t h e m ac ab r e t h at h ad j u s t o c c u r r ed.

o f w r in k l y , s u n - s p o t t ed—h clean off.

an ds t w is t ed m y h ead

e started to s uish my stump of a

N o b o dy k n o w s t h e t r o u b l es I ’ v e b een t h r o u g h as an E xp o m ar k er .

MOTHERCLUCKER Derek Abella & Annmarie Raskin

S u b m er g ed in s w eat an d t h e s c r at c h y l in en s t h at t r ap p ed h er in h er ev en in g m is er y , L o u is e l ay in h er b ed. S h e’ d b een h av in g n ig h t m ar es f o r m o n t h s n o w , ev er s in c e s h e b r o k e h er v eg an diet . S h e h ad a Mc N u g g et . T h e r adiat in g y el l o w l ig h t s eep in g f r o m

t h e c r ac k b en eat h h er do o r , p ar al l el t o h er b ed, dr o w n ed h er

in t er r o r an d b ak ed h er in an o v en o f f ear . I t w as o n e c h ic k en n u g g et . T h at w as al l . S h e h adn ’ t k il l ed t h e c h ic k en h er s el f o r deep - f r ied it in c an o l a o il . S h e j u s t h ad o n e b it e an d b u r ied it in a s m al l p at c h o f h u m id dir t in h er b ac k y ar d. C l u c k in g ec h o ed in h er n ig h t m ar es an d t h e q u il l s f r o m

h er do w n p il l o w

s t ab b ed t h e b ac k o f h er f r ail , f r ec k l ed n ec k . S h e dec ided t o w at c h T V . hen she rst sat down on her pungent, drab recliner, she came upon a sassy southern woman making c h ic k en f r ic as s ee. C l i c k . hen a report on bird flu striking chicken farms in the H er s ig n al f ail ed; s h e h ad b een m ean in g t o s w it c h f r o m

est. C l i c k c l i c k .

an al o g . C l i c k c l i c k . C l i c k ag ain . C l i c k c l i c k , s h e

t u r n ed ar o u n d: “ C l u c k .” he shook it off it was all in her head. he uietly made her way to her room, so she wouldn t trip and f ac il it at e h er m u r der . L o u is e s l am m ed an d l o c k ed t h e do o r b eh in d h er an d l o o k ed f o r a s h ado w in t h e c r ac k o f h er do o r . S h e l ay o n h er b ed, in h er l ac e n ig h t g o w n , t u g g in g at h er c o l l ar . S h e t r ied t o c o u n t sheep, but all she could see was chickens. he nally drifted off, but was awoken by the presence of a w h is p er in h er ear . S h e s aw a b ear ded m an in a c h ic k en s u it w it h f o g g y ey es t il t in g h is h ead s l ig h t l y t o t h e l ef t . H e o n l y s aid o n e t h in g : “ C o c k - a- do o dl e- do o . ” 66

Y es l ien G ar c ia, S h a ped M e, A c r y l ic o n C an v as

A PRODUCT OF CIRCUMSTANCE

Nicole Garcia

at h an iel B r adf o r d w as a p r o du c t o f c ir c u m s t an c e. F o r al l in t en t s an d p u r p o s es , h e w as t h e c h il d ev er y p ar en t des ir ed. H e p l ay ed t en n is as a c as u al h o b b y an d s o c c er as a c as u al ac t o f w ar . H e did t h e dis h es w h en h e w as as k ed t o t h e dis h es . A n d w h at h e l ac k ed in ac adem ic p r o w es s , h e m ade u p f o r in c o m m o n s en s e ( w h ic h , as h e w o u l d b e q u ic k t o p o in t o u t , w as t h e m o r e im p o r t an t o f t h e t w o ) . D es p it e al l o f t h is , N at h an iel n ev er as k ed f o r t h e l if e h eâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; d b een g iv en . H e w as g iv en it r eg ar dl es s . E ac h c u r io u s h ap p en s t an c e an d r an do m c o in c iden c e c ar v ed aw ay at h im as a r iv er w o u l d a r o c k u n t il t h e N at h an iel B r adf o r d h e w as b ec am e t h e N at h an iel B r adf o r d ev er y o n e k n ew h im t o b e. T h er e w as n o t h in g c ir c u m s t an t ial ab o u t t h e c h es t , h o w ev er . I t l ay in t h e b ac k o f t h e f am il y at t ic since the attic rst came to be. et its gold trim still

g l eam ed in t h e s u n l ig h t an d t h e p o l is h ed w o o d w as s t il l c o o l t o t h e t o u c h . E ac h c u r l c ar v ed al o n g it s edg e b o r e a p u r p o s e. E ac h l o c k w as in t en t o n k eep in g it s c o n t en t s h idden . N o t h in g ab o u t t h e c h es t w as ac c iden t al . T h er e w as n o t h in g ac c iden t al ab o u t t h e w ay N at h an iel w as s en t t o t h e at t ic , eit h er . H is m o t h er c l aim ed t o b e f eel in g n o s t al g ic t h at day an d as k ed h im t o f et c h t h e p h o t o al b u m o f h er an d Mr . B r adf o r dâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; s w eddin g day , H e c r ep t t h r o u g h t h e at t ic , keeping a wary eye out for stray nails on the floor. A n d w h il e h e f o u n d n eit h er t h e n ail s n o r t h e al b u m , he did nd the chest. t rst, he thought it to be an illusion. t was a n at u r al r eac t io n , o f c o u r s eâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; n o s an e m an c o u l d b e ab l e t o t ak e in s u c h an et h er eal o b j ec t al l at o n c e. O n c e h e w as s u r e it w as n o il l u s io n , N at h an iel s t ep p ed f o r w ar d. H e l aid a h an d o n t h e g o l d t r im , r an

artin argaglione, I n s i d e

a nger along the polished wood. ot a speck of dust had settled on its surface. et as peculiar as it was to see such an ob ect in what could ve been anyone s attic, he was not particularly s u r p r i s e d . here was something inviting about its presence. omething compelled him to push forward, to pry open the lock and reveal the chest s contents. nd yet he held back. athaniel continued his search for the photo album, and, upon nding it, darted back down the stairs to return it to his mother. ichelle radford was an e traordinary woman. here was no doubt about that. ore importantly, she was a woman who seldom missed an important detail. ad athaniel ddled with the lock, she would ve heard the c l a n g of each failed attempt. ad he nally succeeded in opening the chest, she would ve felt the creak and steady rumble of their

left , O u t s i d e

right ,

i ed

edia

family secret s unmasking. he knew athaniel would regard the chest with curiosity. he had planned on it. ach moment was a result of careful consideration, of tireless planning and countless dreams of the day her son would partake in the family legacy. day sooner and the boy would ve felt too rushed a day later and the opportunity would be closed off for good. o, it had to be on that day, in that precise moment. othing could be left to circumstance. hat she failed to reali e was that athaniel radford was a product of circumstance.

here was no steady rumble waiting for ichelle. nstead, there was a scream.

ITâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S THE CEMETERIES YOU DIDNâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;T LIKE Emily Mendez

I t w as a p h o t o g r ap h n ev er t ak en , t h at s et y o u off a s c ar n ev er f o r m ed a f r ien d n ev er m ade butterflies in your stomach, never flown. t hit you inconspicuously, but fre uently, asserted its presence. ike a song you didn t know the words to, a turn you didn t remember to take, or a middle of the night terror that no memory consoled. t s the cemeteries you didn t like, the family reunions, the communions. nd sitting on your lawn not really alone, but you sure as hell felt like it y o u t h o u g h t to y o u r s e lf, hich folly is more consuming to regret, or not to remember at all

J u r is s a T el l ez , A l l t h e I f s , Mixed Media

ON TREADING SOFTLY Jialin Zhang D o o r o p en s â&#x20AC;&#x201D;t

h en c l o s es .

S t ay in g o n o n l y r ig h t - l ef t r o ads ,

A l ig h t c l ic k s o n an d

I g n o r in g t h e g am b l es

en v el o p s t h e r o o m

s t o p p in g t h e w an t in g

in an air y b r il l ian c e,

f o r w h at c o u l d h av e b een

m ir r o r in g t h at o f t h e s u n .

w h at s h o u l d h av e b een .

T h at m y s t ic al r o o m ,

S it t in g q u iet l y ,

en c h an t ed s p ac e,

w h is p er in g f ev er is h l y ,

s h o w s a b r ig h t g l im p s e

y ear n in g des p er at el y .

o f w h at c o u l d h av e b een

A s t o n o t g iv e u p o u r

w h at s h o u l d h av e b een .

r ev er ies f o r r eal it y w e c h o o s e t h e h al f h ear t

B u t t h e l o c at io n is

o v er t h e w h o l e.

l o n g f o r g o t t en ,

F o r f ear o f b r eak ag e,

led away in an attic where bo es are lled to the brim

w e c h o o s e t h e al r eady b r o k en

w it h m em o r ies an d l ef t

f o r f ear o f ir r ep ar ab l e dam ag e,

al o n g s ide o u r dr eam s ,

n o t u n der s t an din g

ab an do n ed t o die

t h at t h e w h o l e h ear t

â&#x20AC;&#x2DC; t il t h ey ar e m er e s h ado w s

is where we nd the

o f w h at c o u l d h av e b een

c o u r ag e t o c l im b u p

w h at s h o u l d h av e b een .

an d g r as p t h e c h an c es ab o v e.

L ig h t l y w e t r ead in t h e du s t , f ear f u l o f b r eak in g g l as s an d l eav in g a l o n g er - l as t in g m ar k t h an t h at o l d in k s t ain o n t h e c h air .

s h at t er in g in t o p iec es ;

o nd what could have been, w h at s t il l c o u l d b e.

A l ej an dr a C h in ea, D i s a ppea ri n g C h a i rs , I n k

DRIVEWAY

Michael Leyte-Vidal

very time see that van sitting on deflated

edg es j u s t l ik e t h e edg es o f t h e g r as s t h at l ies

t ir es in t h e dr iv ew ay , it r em in ds m e o f a

al o n g t h e s idew al k , g r as s t h at m y g r an dm o t h er

scene from a post apocalyptic lm.

hand cuts with scissors.

y o u w al k n ext t o it , l iz ar ds s c u r r y o u t f r o m

hen in s ide

w h o didn ’ t l eav e t h e h o u s e w it h o u t g el in h is h air

the wheel well. ou can barely see inside the lthy

and a button up shirt. t s the same clean edges

windows. wonder if the interior still smells of my

now have in my hair. hose who knew him best

grandfather s cologne.

c o n s t an t l y c o m m en t o n h o w m y s t y l e r em in ds

y grandfather won t sell it. ot that anyone

them of his. E v en t h o u g h I didn ’ t

would buy a car in that state of disrepair. t used to be a big

r eal iz e it f o r a w h il e, m y

point of contention between

g r an df at h er w as t h e ep it o m e

my father and her, but nobody

of class and style. verything

really notices it anymore. o

about him displayed this,

get into the backyard you

fro m

j u s t w al k ar o u n d it an d t r y

collected behavior, to his

t o av o id t h e r u s t y r ear v iew

dress pants and shirt.

mirrors on the way. o park

s m el l ed o f p o w er f u l y et

in f r o n t o f m y g r an dm o t h er ’ s

c o m f o r t in g c o l o g n e w it h

h o u s e—t

ust a hint of aftershave.

h e h o u s e t h at s h e h as

c am e t o A m er ic a— y o u h av e t o p ar k o n t h e l aw n an d t r y t o g et

h is c o o l , c al m , an d e

w o u l d h av e h at ed t o s ee

l iv ed in f o r 5 0 y ear s s in c e s h e

t h e v an h e p r iz ed t h e w ay it

Mar c o L ey t e- V idal , M i c h a el L ey t e- V i d a l , P en c il I l l u s t r at io n is now.

he tendrils of vines

your engine above the sidewalk so that you don t burn the grass too much.

t h at n o w en c r o ac h o n t h e v an ar e j u s t l ik e t h e

g r an dm o t h er p r ides h er s el f o n h av in g a w el l -

disease that violated my grandfather s mind.

groomed yard.

My m em o r ies o f t h at v an ar e m em o r ies o f t h e shiny black paint, the bright blue stripe, and the

very day when was little, before and after school, would climb into that car.

perpetually empty passenger seat. wouldn t be

grandmother and would sit on the bench seat in

shocked at the sight of the deflated, run down

the back.

van if hadn t known its former glory. wouldn t

hile my grandfather drove, silent and

strong, we would talk about school or practice or

have been shocked at the sight of my messy

some new craft she learned.

haired, incomprehensible grandfather on his

probably saw the back of his head more than 74

e was an old crooner

saw his face.

is haircut was clean with straight

deathbed if had not known that he was such an incredible man.

M a rc o L ey t e- V i d a l , P h o t o g r ap h y

A m y S c o t t , M r. J a m es B l a k el y , P h o t o g r ap h y

MY GRANDPA’S HANDS Janay Blakely B r o w n s u l l ied dir t m o l ded in t o l if e T h es e ar e m y g r an df at h er ’ s h an ds L ar g e en o u g h t o s w al l o w al l o f t h e n ig h t s k y H ail in g f r o m

deep Mis s is s ip p i, r em n an t s o f it s g r eat r iv er r u n t h ic k an d s t r o n g as

B u l g in g v ein s T h es e ar e m y g r an df at h er ’ s h an ds H ar d an d c al l o u s ed, c o n dit io n ed f r o m F ro m

y ear s o f p u l l in g w eeds , t h e p r ic k in g o f t h o r n s ,

s u n r is e ’ t il s u n s et B u r n t p ag es o f p ar c h m en t w it h il l eg ib l e m es s ag es s c r aw l ed ap ar t C u b an c ig ar s , h an d- r o l l ed an d s ic k l y s w eet C r ac k ed w o o d o f an t iq u e t ab l es T h e m u ddied w at er s o f t h e D eep S o u t h he darkness of a cotton eld at midnight O f an em p t y h o u s e

T h es e ar e m y g r an df at h er ’ s h an ds

MY STRUGGLE AGAINST THE PIANO Neelanshu Thapar

o m et im es I w is h I c o u l d g o b ac k in t im e an d

b ec am e ap p ar en t . H e w as o b v io u s l y l o o k in g f o r a

w ar n m y s el f . I f it w er e p o s s ib l e, I w o u l d

p r o dig y . A t t h e r ec it al s , h e u s ed t o c o m p et e w it h

s u r el y h av e t o l d m y s el f t o r u n aw ay t h e day

an o t h er p ian o t eac h er t o s ee w h o h ad m o l ded t h e

m y m o t h er t u r n ed t o as k w h at in s t r u m en t I w as

better student. t was like watching children ght

g o in g t o p l ay ( al r eady as s u m in g t h at I w as g o in g t o b e

o v er t o y s . I r eal iz ed at s o m e p o in t t h at I h ad t o g et o u t . I

p l ay in g o n e) . I r es p o n ded, u n aw ar e t h at t h e m o m en t I o p en ed

h ad p l ay ed l o n g en o u g h t o b ec o m e g o o d; in f ac t ,

m y m o u t h I h ad al r eady l o s t t h e r ig h t t o r ef u s e. I t o l d

I m ig h t ev en s ay I w as exc el l en t at o n e p o in t , b u t

h er dr u m s . S h e s aid n o . I s aid t r u m p et . S h e s aid n o .

I al w ay s f el t a h eav y h an d p u s h in g m e t o do w el l

said cello.

gain, she said no.

nally said guitar,

h en I r eal iz ed t h is ,

I b eg an t o p l ay b adl y o n p u r p o s e. Min d y o u , b o t h

t o w h ic h s h e r ep l ied, “ W el l . . . if b y g u it ar y o u m ean p ian o , t h en y es ,

T c h aik o v s k y an d m y m o t h er w er e t o u g h c o o k ies ; s o , it t o o k n o l es s t h an t w o y ear s o f b o t c h ed p er f o r m an c es

r o c k o n , ” an d s o I b eg an p ian o . I h at ed it f r o m

in s t ead o f in n er m o t iv at io n . W

t h e b eg in n in g . T h e r ep et it iv e,

l o n g , an d c o n f u s in g p r ac t ic es w er e o n l y exac er b at ed b y t h e f ac t t h at I w as p l ay in g in a m u s ic al g en r e

t o r eac h t h eir b r eak in g p o in t s . O n e day , m y in s t r u c t o r , in h is n ev er en din g uest to nd the ne t hopin, looked at me and said

c o m p l et el y al ien t o m y g en er at io n . T o m ak e

ear n es t l y , “ I k n o w t h at y o u k n o w t h at I k n o w t h at y o u

t h in g s w o r s e, I w as t u t o r ed b y a b al d R u s s ian , a

do n ’ t c ar e ab o u t p ian o . . . l et ’ s b e h o n es t h er e. ”

t r em en do u s l y o p p r es s iv e m an w h o m

I w il l c al l

ll it took was one simple hint at the a rmative

T c h aik o v s k y f o r t h e s ak e o f p r iv ac y . T c h aik o v s k y w as

an d T c h aik o v s k y q u it , w it h o u t as m u c h as a

n o t a n ic e g u y ; h e w as p l eas an t en o u g h b ef o r e an d

p ar t in g g l an c e.

af t er p r ac t ic e, b u t f o r t h e o n e h o u r du r in g w h ic h h e

I f el t g u il t y , b u t b ey o n d t h e g u il t w as a v as t w el l

h ad m e, h e w as l ik e I v an t h e T er r ib l e. A f t er y ear s

o f p l eas u r e. I s m il ed ev er y t im e I w al k ed p as t t h e

u n der h is t u t el ag e, t h e s o u r c e o f h is v eh em en c e

p ian o w h ic h n o w s t ar t ed g at h er in g du s t in t h e

c o r n er o f m y l iv in g r o o m . My m o t h er t r ied t o r ep l ac e

o t h er s w it h m y p r o b l em s .

t h e in s t r u c t o r w it h o t h er s , b u t b y t h is p o in t w e b o t h k n ew I h ad w o n . S o , j u s t l ik e t h at , l if e w en t o n . A f t er f o u r y ear s

I s t ar t ed p l ay in g t h e p ian o ag ain . I h ad t o l ear n note by note and nd pieces that were strong enough t o exp r es s m y f eel in g s .

L u c k il y , it w as l ik e r idin g a

I l it er al l y f o r g o t t h at w e h ad a p ian o . T h at â&#x20AC;&#x2122; s w h en

b ic y c l e. S l o w l y , I b u il t m y s el f u p u n t il I w as c o n t en t

h ig h s c h o o l s t ar t ed, an d I s t r u g g l ed ac adem ic al l y an d

w it h m y m u s ic . I p l ay ed f o r h o u r s , an d h o u r s b ec am e

s o c ial l y . I w as in c r edib l y o v er w eig h t , an d al t h o u g h

day s .

I l o s t t h e w eig h t l at er , b ac k t h en it l ef t m e f eel in g

ag ain . T h e b it t er m edic in e t h at u s ed t o b e t h e b an e

o s t r ac iz ed an d al o n e. I n eeded an o u t l et f o r t h o s e

o f m y exis t en c e is n o w

I t â&#x20AC;&#x2122; s b een t w o y ear s s in c e I t o o k u p t h e p ian o o n e o f m y g r eat es t p l eas u r es .

em o t io n s , b u t l ik e m y s t o ic f at h er , I r ef u s ed t o g o t o

T h er es a L ee D o v er , T h e Pi a n o , P as t el s

WHAT SHOULD I KNOW ABOUT JAZZ? Tanarut Chaisuesomboon W

hat made me hate it.

h en I w as y o u n g er , always assumed that a

ot my father s

was off limits,

ou ust have to be good,

nd then you ll love it mantra

t h at I w as exc l u ded from the world of ount asie and his

pparent in all portrayals of sian fathers.

rchestra.

ell, not his orchestra ut was sentenced to a musical hell

B ec au s e, ( as an y g o o d s t er eo t y p e w o u l d) ,

here was dictated every articulation,

was e pected to play piano or violin. o learned the piano.

very note, every accent, even emotion as if

hated it.

ubato would be a su cient substitute for passion. nd that could only en oy the instrument ecause of the tone of my yellow skin,

always feigned my attraction to the piano ecause had found myself a pile of old tapes and y parents had kept in dusty drawers as if ailedâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;

aundiced melanin, hat would forever play

eftover music from a day gone by.

obotic renditions of technically generic music.

ee, a

nother stereotype checked off.

was a mistress.

nd was an adulterer. ts e otic body gave color to the monochrome keys

ut you know, eventually found myself

n radical signatures and time changes,

t the piano again.

n voices that echoed of a life years past

introduced my mistress to my divorced,

hat yearned to oin.

y a

y parents would never know of my bedtime trysts

nd left behind a world in which piano

ith ady lla and

as only for

inah

ashington.

et, soon learned that it wasn t proper, asn t

sian to en oy black music,

ince listening to a

was a birthright

to my piano, o art and rahms.

ee, once feared of not being

sian ,

a pattern wasn t brave enough to break ut waged my silent war in nights of brass,

nly for those with the right amount of melanin

n pentatonics and bebop,

nd that should go back to playing ach.

hat rhythm of the tom tom beat,

o hated piano even more.

o that didn t have to conform another day A s an ar c h et y p e,

et, it wasn t the melodies and countermelodies,

he stereotype, a mere reflection of an sian.

he points and counterpoints was forced to play

o hey, what should know about a

A n a C h an g , H a i rs t y l es , D ig it al P ain t in g

IN LAYMAN’S TERMS (AN EXCERPT) Nicole Garcia

L ee P iv n ik , S i x t een , P h o t o g r ap h y

nr a a ns o n i s in a roo i a an s os o o rs in is i i in a s is i or a a in i s n ir as isi

s rio s an n is roo n s o a s o in r n r i a in nr o s o r s i is a an Elysium si r s a s oo s n si

he stage is are sa e or a ery pro essional desk and chair placed slightly o center. o other chairs are near y. eated at the desk is .B H eet kicked up on the desk reading a ne spaper. He flips a page or t o e ore checking his atch and smiling aintly. B L A C K T H O R N : Mo r t al s . W h o w o u l d’ v e t h o u g h t . ( nter a con used H stage le t. He anders aimlessly.) L o o k in g ar o u n d w o n ’ t do y o u an y g o o d. H E N R Y : I ’m s o r r y ? B L A C K T H O R N : L o o k c ar ef u l l y . W h at do y o u s ee? ( Henry s uints.) H E N R Y : N o t h in g . B L A C K T H O R N : P r ec is el y . H E N R Y : … B u t y o u ’ r e h er e, ar en ’ t y o u ? B L A C K T H O R N : I am . H E N R Y : S o t h en , am I aw ak e? B L A C K T H O R N : ( h e s i t a n t l y ) I n a s en s e. H E N R Y : I ’ m s o r r y . I ’ m j u s t c o n f u s ed, t h at ’ s al l . I ’ m t r y in g t o m ak e s en s e o f t h in g s . I m ean , I do n ’ t r em em b er h o w I got here in the rst place. hat s what happens when you re in a dream—you don t remember. ve ust never had a dr eam w h er e I k n ew I w as dr eam in g b ef o r e.

re you familiar with the ve stages of grief ome again B L A C K T H O R N : ( s ig h in g f course you wouldn t. enowned psychologist lisabeth ubler oss once studied the effects death has on a person, whether it was the death of a close one or coming to terms with their own imminent demise. enial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance—that was the order, believe. f course, no two people are the same. ome skip to anger and continue the stages from there. thers deal with death through denial and then depression. ou, however, weren t given enough time to e perience any of these stages. ut you will. m lost. can see that. ut do you know why you re lost ook, m sorry to disappoint you, but all want right now is an answer. truthful answer. one of that mystic stuff. f you insist. ou re dead. ( P a u s e .) ead ou asked. m not dead. can t be dead enial. H E N R Y : ( f r a n t i c a l l y s this some sick oke you play on people rag them to this—whatever this is—and nger. ( H e n r y is s p e e c h le s s .) hall we move on o to hell. ( H e n r y a t t e m p t s t o r u n a w a y . S u d d e n ly ,h e fr e e z e s ,c o m p le t e ly p a r a ly z e d . B la c k t h o r n c a lm ly w a lk s t o w a r d s w h e re h e s to p p e d . ) ot so sorry now, are you, r. ayman ( Blackthorn flicks his hand – Henry crumples to the ground.) ou can t go any further than where you are now, after all. here s nothing to see in the sense that there is literally nothing waiting for you out there. f you don t believe me, go ahead. eep walking. ( H e l o w e r s d o w n t o H e n r y ’s e y e l e v e l . ) o you believe me now es. eep down, you always did. lackthorn eases his grip on enry. haken, enry picks himself back up. ou weren t murdered, if that s what you re thinking. n all honesty there was nothing gruesome about it. our death was a peaceful one. arbon mono ide poisoning. our air conditioner malfunctioned. ou died in your sleep. ( H e n r y d o e s n ’t r e s p o n d .) our wife is ne too. arah ow do you know about her t s my duty to know. ou— ou didn t hurt her, did you ood heavens, no. he s safe in the world of the living, attending to funeral matters. t s almost as if you think m a kind of monster. o what s my purpose or being here, mean. m glad you asked. ou re here for a redemption. . . of a sort.

DEATH OF DUCK TOLD IN REVERSE Lynn Fan

uck disappeared from the studio one day and never came back. ane found the window to the top floor t eas in g l y o p en ed. T h e s h eer s il k c u r t ain s w er e b il l o w in g w il dl y . R ag g ed an d c o l d f r o m

s p ar e r ain dr o p s .

G o o db y e. G o o db y e. G o o db y e.

T h is w as deat h an d b ir t h , an d f r eedo m

in t h eir p u r es t el em en t s .

J an e em b r ac ed t h e t u r b u l en t s k y . S h e h el d D u c k ’ s dr eam

c l o s e t o h er c h es t .

T h e v er y l as t t im e t h ey s aw eac h o t h er al o n e, w as a f ew n ig h t s b ef o r e. D u c k w as l ean in g ag ain s t t h e g l as s o f h is balcony door, vest and suit, and straight legged slacks. or the rst time, his e pression was la , eyes a ovial shade o f am b er . J an e h ad s aid, I w an t t o s et y o u f r ee. A n d h e’ d s m il ed a s m il e t o r em em b er . T h ey ’ d b o t h f al l en in in t r ig u e w it h o n e an o t h er . D u c k , w it h h er s ec r et n ih il is m . J an e, w it h h is im p en din g c at h ar s is . S h e w o n der ed, n o t if , b u t w h en . T h is w as n o t l o v e, n o t l u s t , n o t c l o s e t o eit h er . J an e w as b o y b l az er s , an d t r ail in g w h it e s k ir t s . B el di o l iv es , an d c am el l ig h t s . A m ak eu p ar t is t an d a g am in g addic t . he held

uck s chin in her faerie ngers, other hand carding softly through sharply cropped hair. he silence was

l it t er ed w it h m is c el l an eo u s l it t l e s o u n ds . H air s p r ay . D r y er . Mu r m u r s . uck asked if she liked her ob, all careful smiles, an d v ac an t ey es , an d s h e’ d an s w er ed, y es , y es s h e did. T h ey l ik ed t h eir m en p al l id an d b eau t if u l , t h in b o dies w r ap p ed in t r en c h c o at , an d t ig h t c o t t o n . E y es , t h ey w an t , sunken with emotional hunger. aw lines, sharp, austere, and ase ual. T h is o n e h as an in t er es t in g b ac k g r o u n d. H o w in t er es t in g , a w o m an as k ed. 84

S o p h ia P adg et t P er ez , T ry s t a n , P h o t o g r ap h y

A dr y s m il e, W as a p il o t , dis h o n o r ab l y dis c h ar g ed. D u c k w as a B u r b er r y b o y . A p o l l o n ian f eat u r es an d f u l l l ip s . J u s t l ik e t h e o n e t h at s t o o d b ef o r e h im

in t h e m o der n l y

dec o r at ed h al l w ay . A n d t h e o n e b eh in d h im . he scattering of androgynous features blurred from one man to the other.

flock of strangely dressed birds they

w er e. Mer in o o n l in en . P l aid o n j ean . h en D u c k c r ied, it w as a r ib s h at t er in g u p h eav al . A s o u n d u g l y , h el p l es s , an d f r an t ic . e could not be content.

hen he tried to fly higher, they tore his wings off.

Man y y ear s l at er , o n e m an , an d n o o t h er s , w o u l d r em em b er a f ac el es s y o u n g l ad s t ar in g at t h e w et s k y ab o v e. A h an d k n it r ed s w eat er , r o u g h ed u p an d u g l y , p it c h ed w h er e t h e s c ap u l as edg ed f o r w ar d. P r o m in en t an d s in g u l ar l y s t r an g e t h ey w er e. T h is m an h ad a r ev el at io n t h en . S o m et h in g o f s k y , an d s c ar s , an d t h w ar t ed dr eam s . 85

S ab r in a Men do z a, D es pa i r i n Pet a re, C h ar c o al

EN MI BARRIO Janay Blakely E n m i b a r r io ,lo s p o b r e s b a ila n . O u r m u s ic , t h e c l in k in g o f b r o k en b eer b o t t l es Mo an s o f h u n g r y c h il dr en T h e r at t l in g o f an c ien t b o n es T h is is t h e m u s ic t o w h ic h w e dan c e o u r s ad s am b a W

in d w h ip s o u r dir t y h air in t o a f r en z y

T h e el eg an t c o s t u m e o f m u d s t r eak ed s k in as P ar t n er s s w it c h h an ds grimy tango lled with despair

WESTERN SUICIDE Lynn Fan

A W es t er n s u ic ide, I s in t h e c h au v in is t ic den im

j u t o f y o u r h ip s ,

T h e m edic al l y p l eas in g c u r v at u r e o f y o u r s p in e, L eat h er s h o u l der s , C r eas ed an at o m y , T h e c at h ar s is o f m is dir ec t ed v io l en c e an d p s eu do - er o t ic is m .

A W es t er n s u ic ide, I s in t h e dr o o l in g l iq u o r ar o u n d y o u r ey es , T h e g r o s s b l u e s w el l in g o f y o u r C ep h al ic v ein s , N o t o r io u s t at t o o s , S at u r at ed s k in , T h e c u r l in g t en dr il s o f a r o t t en s c en t t r ap p ed l ik e a l eaf b et w een p ag es .

Y o u r s al t y s l u r s , an d c u r io u s in du l g en c es , Y in c is io n c ar n ag e an d f at h er l es s s o n s , A W es t er n s u ic ide, A W es t er n s u ic ide. T h e m ir r o r is y o u r A b el , N o w a k al eido s c o p e o f s h ar ds , A n d n o w t h e af t er m at h o f in k y b r eat h , an d c el l o - deep s el f - l o at h in g .

L ee P iv n ik , T h e G i rl F ro m

E l eut h era , D o u b l e E xp o s u r e P h o t o g r ap h y

MY AMERICA: AN INTERVIEW Hannah Pustejovsky

A u s t in M o r a le s ,a ju n io r a t C o r a l R e e f,is a n a r t is t w h o is q u ic k ly m a k in g h im s e lf k n o w n in t h e M ia m i a r t c o m m u n it y w ith h is u n iq u e o u tlo o k o n life . W

C a n y o u te ll m e a b it m o r e a b o u t w h y y o u p ic k e d th is

h a t w o u ld y o u s a y y o u r in s p ir a t io n s a r e ?

p la c e fo r y o u r p h o to s ? e nitely lack wan. am fascinated with the idea of something seeming perfect but never actually achieving

t s an abandoned arena. was so drawn to it because

lot of my work also centers on my passion for

of the memories there. eople used to come to watch

merica, especially my connection to the old history

concerts and shows and have a great time, but now it s

it.

and culture of decades past. like working with the idea

forgotten and falling apart. he gra ti and broken seats

of the duality of merica. ou can see that in all of my

add to the whole atmosphere.

photos. merica is supposed to stand for e uality and perfection, yet something as simple as a marriage is

S o ,w h a t w a s t h e h a r d e s t p a r t a b o u t e a c h p h o t o s h o o t ?

denied to me.

ustin

orales, M es s y M i n d a n d T h o ug h t ,

igital hotography

A u s t in Mo r al es , A W h o l e N ew Po w er a n d C o n t ro l , D ig it al P h o t o g r ap h y

G et t in g ev er y t h in g t h er e! S o m et im es I h ad t o w al k t w o

dis p l ay s t w o m en b u il din g a r el at io n s h ip . E ac h p ic t u r e

m il es w h il e c ar r y in g al l o f m y p r o p s j u s t t o b e ab l e t o

r ep r es en t s a m o m en t in t im e an d, c o n s eq u en t l y ,

s t ar t t ak in g p ic t u r es . B u t t h at ’ s t h e b es t p ar t , y o u k n o w ?

s o m et h in g s p ec ial t o m e.

I t ’ s t h at s at is f y in g f eel in g b ec au s e I k n o w t h at t h es e ar e W

exp ec t at io n s . I t j u s t deep en s t h e m es s ag e.

y o u r a rt?

m y c o n c ep t s , es p ec ial l y w h en t h e p ic t u r es exc eed m y

h a t w o u ld y o u s a y y o u r m e s s a g e is ?

My p h o t o s c o m e f r o m

I do n ’ t h av e j u s t o n e m es s ag e. I g u es s I h av e t o o m u c h t o s ay . May b e, o v er al l , p er f ec t io n is r eal l y a f o r m des t r u c t io n . W

h a t is o n e m o r e th in g y o u w a n t p e o p le to k n o w a b o u t

o f

a r eal l y deep p ar t . I b ec o m e

em o t io n al l y at t ac h ed t o t h em

b ec au s e t h ey s t an d f o r

m o r e t h an an y o n e t h in g . My p h o t o s ar e m e.

h en y o u l o o k at m y l at es t s er ies , it

EVERYTHING I DO IS A REFLECTION OF MYSELF Carolina Beguiristain (Top Left) Refraction detail 1, mylar sculpture (Bottom Left) Refraction. mylar sculpture (Bottom Right) Refraction detail 2, mylar sculpture (Opposite Page) Nose Job, Acrylic and marker on mylar

h ear d t h e m o s t in t im at e t h in g y o u c an do t o s o m eo n e is k il l t h em , ” s h e s ay s .

detail like the lens of a ne camera, focusing and

nearly fall off my branch.

hat

he most intimate thing you can do to someone is kill them, she says, this time a bit eal l y s p o k en ,

an y w ay . ( R u t h h as t h is w ay o f s p eak in g s o t h at y o u ’ r e answered, but never really paid attention to.

was

hoping that bringing her to our tree would shake her out of whatever bad mood she was in.

ere, a star

o r t w o p eer s t h r o u g h t h e h az e o f c l o u ds t h at h an g overhead and the reflies drift la ily through the night sky. ave for their bu ing, there s nothing to interrupt

Nicole Garcia

THE MOST INTIMATE THING

h er in t er es t .

but don t know. ve talked to other girls before, and

I t ’ s t h e m o s t s h e’ s s p o k en al l day —r

h er t h o u g h t s n o w .

gure that if she needs to say

I s h if t t o w ar ds t h e t r u n k an d t r y t o s w in g m y way to her side of the tree before thinking better of it. hat s a little morbid,

get along with them ust ne. ome to think of it, most g ir l s do n ’ t s n ap at t h e s o u n d o f t h e w o r d hello , either. uth can be a v e r y m o o dy g ir l . oes this mean you re going to kill me or something

ause m ready to run.

I t h in k I s ee a s m il e o u t o f t h e c o m er o f m y ey e— the rst she s smiled all day.

ddly enough, m not

comforted. try to convince myself that it was ust

an y t h in g , s h e’ l l s ay it h er e.

m y im ag in at io n . he must ve noticed, because she sighs and rolls her eyes.

mutter.

on t be stupid. d never do something like

t h a t t o s o m eo n e l ik e y o u . ”

think it makes sense.

s that an insult or a compliment

ell, think about it. elationships are all about

ake it as an insult.

give and take. nd the biggest thing you can

ou re the sweetest.

give—or take is someone s life.

his time, her smile doesn t set me on the edge.

t s tough to hold back a snort.

hat makes

try.

n o s en s e. ” hat s when she turns to face me, steel eyes locked on mine.

hy not

t s a test, m sure.

hatever say now will make

or break...something. ecause that s the way girls are. hey hold onto things—things that probably didn t mean much an y h o w , an d u s e it ag ain s t y o u at t h e s t r an g es t o f t im es .

L at er t h at n ig h t , w e r o as t m ar s h m al l o w s . R u t h t ak es over my roasting duties when bum one marshmallow too many.

e tell each other rumors of ghosts

w an der in g ar o u n d t o w n u n t il s h e c al l s it a n ig h t an d g o es h o m e, an d t h e n ext m o r n in g w e c ar r y o n w it h o u r lives at school as if we never met before.

t s a little annoying, to be honest. uth can be a moody girl.

R u t h is a f u n n y k in d o f g ir l .

ponder the uestion for a moment. ll can

S o m et im es I t h in k t h at s h e do es n ’ t t al k t o m e at

come up with is,

aybe they don t want to die.

er ga e shifts to the moon.

aybe, she says.

don t think ll ever understand uth. ot the

focusing only to pan ahead as if it never touched

D ad u s ed t o t el l m e t h at ’ s j u s t t h e w ay g ir l s w o r k ,

m o r es l o w l y .

he shrugs.

ot the way those grey eyes scrutini e every

way her moods rise and fall like a steady breath.

school for my sake rather than for hers to save me from being a social pariah, guess. ometimes could care l es s . B u t t h er e ar e m o m en t s w h er e I c an al m o s t im ag in e how nice it would be to see her smile in the daylight.

S o p h ia P adg et t - P er ez R o m i n a P h o t o g r ap h y

N at h al ie F r an c is , Z o d i a c , S t il l f r o m

V ideo

NAKED Annmarie Raskin

he woke up on the floor.

iscarded by a lover who was curious to see what

fabric felt like underneath, the natural te tures of skin. he looked at her acid wash bruises, temporary memories of being thrown on the floor, falling out of e n t o u r n a n t , and e perimentation with bleach. icked and pried open, leaving white thread surfaces resembling an un nished loom. he never did learn how to sew, which was made apparent by the rips and poorly done stitches.

he lay knotted, one leg crossed over the otherâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;a psychiatrist. he held secrets like pockets, spoken words turned to ink. en ink. he was afraid of anything permanent, even though it took ages for things to wash off her skin. he embraced her transformation as her capillaries turned the color of thread.

THOUGHTS WHILE WAITING Janay Blakely A n o t h er m an in a l ab c o at

F in g er s , t h ic k s y r in g es p r o b e

A l l w r in k l es an d w in ds h iel d g l as s es ;

My b o dy . I ig n o r e t h e f ac t t h ey l in g er o n m y s k in

A ir t h ic k w it h an t is ep t ic . P ap er t h in .

j u s t a m o m en t t o o l o n g . I

F r o c k s h if t in g u n c o m f o r t ab l y o n t h e t ab l e.

W o n der h o w l o n g it is u n t il I ab an do n t h e do o r o f t h e em er g en c y r o o m

“ G o d . ” S ay in g h is n am e f eel s o dd. J u m b l ed I n m y m o u t h l ik e at t em p t in g F r en c h in t h e t h ic k es t o f J ap an es e ac c en t s . I

D eat h ’ s do o r . C an I b r in g t h o s e I l o v e?

N o o n e l iv es f o r ev er b u t n o o n e w an t s t o D ie al o n e. Q u iet l y , t u c k ed aw ay b eh in d

K n o w w e h av en ’ t s p o k en in a w h il e. I

four white washed walls under fluorescent

D o n ’ t ev en r em em b er h o w w e’ r e s u p p o s ed t o

L ig h t s . A r e t h e l ig h t s o f h eav en o f b et t er q u al it y ?

A ddr es s o n e an o t h er . D o es h e s t il l an s w er

C an ’ t im ag in e t h ey w o u l dn ’ t b e. D o t h ey m ak e

A s in n er ’ s p r ay er ? L o n g dis t an c e p h o n e

1 1 0 w at t s u p er n o v as an d ec o - f r ien dl y s t ar s ?

C al l s t r an s v er s in g u n iv er s es ; b ad c o n n ec t io n s . S t at ic . W

h it e n o is e. C an ’ t h ear an y v o ic es .

“ Y o u n eed m o r e t es t s ” Mr . L ab c o at s p eak s . F u n n y t h ey dr es s l ik e g h o s t s in a p l ac e m ean t t o s av e l iv es .

an d k n o c k o n

float towards them as my last prescription B u l l do z es m e

eep in tful dreamless sleep. F in al l y a m o m en t o f r es p it e f r o m p o n der in g ag e o l d q u es t io n s .

Mail e T o r r es , S el f Po rt ra i t s , Mixed Media

100

Y es l in G ar c ia, D e a n , I n k o n N ew s p ap er

MINOR ROLE

Isabell Manibusan h er e w as n o c at ac l y s m ic s c en e w h er e s h e

an d s h o u t h er n am e. i’ d r u n an d s h e’ d t u r n j u s t

adm it t ed s h e’ d c h eat ed o n m e w it h m y b es t

in t im e. i w o u l d g at h er h er u p in m y m an l y ar m s

f r ien d. t h er e w as n o s h o u t in g . n o t ear f u l

an d r eas s u r e h er ev er y t h in g

ap o l o g ies .

s ay s o m et h in g ab o u t h o w

i did n o t g r ab h er ar m s an d s h ak e h er al m o s t

n ev er w an e. s h e’ d l ay h er h ead am o n g s t al l m y

t o o h ar d w it h an g r y t ear s in m y ey es dem an din g

c h es t h air an d ev er y t h in g w o u l d b e t h e w ay it w as .

w h y w h y w h y.

w as al r ig h t , t h en

m y l o v e f o r h er w o u l d

b u t , in s t ead, s h e s aid s h e w as s o r r y s h e

s h e did n o t t ear f u l l y c r u m p l e in t o m y s h o c k ed

c o u l dn ’ t l o v e m e t h e w ay i l o v ed h er an d

arms and sob i msorrysni eireallydidn tmeanit.

continued on. the door gave out a soft nal click

s h e t o l d m e s h e j u s t didn ’ t l o v e m e l ik e s h e

as if it w er e a s p ec t at o r t o t h e w h o l e t h in g an d it

u s ed t o . s h e c o u l dn ’ t c o n t in u e. . . t h is .

h ad t o c r o s s b et w een u s t o u s e t h e b at h r o o m . t h e

( h er e, s h e t h r ew u p h er ar m s an d g es t u r ed t o t h e

c l ic k w as an aw k w ar d, “ s o r r y , m an . ” p er h ap s it w as b ec au s e t h es e del ic at el y

w eig h t i p il ed o n h er s h o u l der s ) t h en , a l ig h t s ig h t h at b r o u g h t m e b ac k t o w h en

f em in in e ar m s w er e n o t s t r o n g en o u g h t o c ar r y

w e w o u l d l au g h . t h at s m al l s ig h af t er a r eal l y

h er b ac k . o r b ec au s e m y h ear t s h ap ed f ac e didn ’ t

f u n n y m o m en t an d t h e w ay s h e’ d w ip e h er ey e

s p o r t a p r o t ag o n is t ’ s c h in .

o f an al m o s t t ear . s h e’ d l o o k at m e w it h h er an y t h in g b u t p l ain b r o w n ey es , s h y l y s m il e, an d t h en av er t t h em

fro m

it m ig h t ’ v e b een t h at i didn ’ t h av e an y dr am at ic o n e- l in er s .

m y g az e. t h en , t eas in g l y ,

flit them back and be a mess of giggles all over

b ec au s e if t h is w er e a m o v ie i’ m w o u l d’ v e t u r n ed ar o u n d.

ag ain . an d w e’ d j u s t l au g h b ec au s e w e w er e h ap p y ( in l o v e) .

s u r es h e

i’ m

s u r e s h e w o u l d’ v e l au g h ed w it h m e

ag ain .

i r em em b er ed al l t h is as i b l an k l y w at c h ed h er g o . i j u s t s t o o d t h er e as s h e p ic k ed u p h er

b u t , i’ m

j u s t a s m al l m in o r c h ar ac t er t h at

p l ay s n o r eal r o l e in t h e m o v ie. t h e o n e t h at

b ag an d w al k ed t o t h e do o r . h er f o o t s t ep s

c r o s s es s t r eet s t o m ak e a s c en e l o o k b u s y , o r

h es it at ed an d s o m ew h er e in t h e m u c k o f m y

o r der s a l at t e w it h n o f o am

m in d t h er e w as a j u m p f o r j o y .

c as h ier .

t h is is w h er e s h e w o u l d t u r n

ar o u n d an d i’ m

t o dis t r ac t t h e

s t u c k w it h t h e em p t y f eel in g i g et w h en i

s adl y s ay g o o db y e. s h e w o u l d exit , an d i, t h e r em em b er h er l au g h . h er s m il e. h an ds o m e p r o t ag o n is t w o u l d p au s e b ef o r e g iv in g

i do n ’ t g et a h ap p y en din g .

c h as e. dr am at ic al l y , i w o u l d t h r o w o p en t h e do o r

101

INSTRUMENTS OF SEPARATION

Lynn Fan

o n n ie is t h e b u z z c u t b o y w it h burnt smears of nger skin where

identity resides.

e s a pale blot against

the etroit sky, stories high and dry. o onnie, there is inverse gravity. e s always seeking for doors, stairs, elevators, human contraptions to go up.

b o t h m u c h t o o o l d f o r t h at . H eâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; l l s w at at R o n n ie w h o h at es it w h en p eo p l e f o l d t h e corners of pages.

b e fo r e I fo ld y o u r b o n e s . im paints whole entire panoramas with his words. q u iet . ut im is kind of an asshole too, the little shit.

here s a feather light tap on his left

e s greedy and handsy, always

trying to drag onnie with him, off to

shoulder. onnie turns without seeing,

strange places. onnie s conflicted about

but knowing, that it s im. im whose body

this.

h o l l o w s in an d o u t b en eat h s o m eo n e el s eâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; s

feel right. ike an off shade chartreuse

tossed out shirt. im who sees ibonacci

y el l o w t h at s el l s as m ac ar o n i an d c h ees e.

and icasso in red light districts, patterns, and art, a beautiful but disturbed genius. onnie leans in to soak up the third hand smoke that curls and lingers on every cotton wrinkle. t s a cheap smell. eing brothers meant intruding in each other s spaces with punches, kicks, and secret handshakes. t meant for life.

e wants to go, but it doesn t e actly

im will tug, tug, and tug. nd with every pull, a brick comes apart. onnie will lose something, something tangible, and rational, yet this doesn t alarm him like it used to anymore. ne day, he knows that he ll follow, helpless but content, a lamb re oining its flock.

ut being twins meant in nity.

ne day, not today, one day.

hen they moved to the city. nd

onnie reclines on the hard cement,

somehow along the way in nity became

spreading his ngers wide against the open sky. t s a statement, a compromise,

nite. onnie likes these impromptu visits. im will read to him, even though they re 102

e s loud and takes up so much

space that onnie s mind will nally feel

nd maybe out of nowhere, im would be t h er e.

e ll say s h u t t h e h e l l u p

and a plea.

e feels, rather than sees, im

doing the same, a recalcitrant grimace

distressed air, strands of honeyed hair caked in the

s p r eadin g ac r o s s f air f eat u r es . T h er eâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; s t h e h u m t im e. J im

o f r el u c t an t ac c ep t an c e. N ext

m u d o f h er m ak eu p . R o n n ie t h in k s o f t h e t ext u r e o f his burnt ngers.

c an w ait .

S o m ew h er e, in an o t h er u n iv er s e, an o t h er s p ec t r u m

o f t im e, a w o m an in w h it e c l ic k s h er r ed

ngernails on a coffee stained clipboard.

silly

s o n g , n o t t h e el o q u en t m at h em at ic al B ac h t h at J im

nd to her, this insolent vintage doll of a woman, there are only the incoherent musical whisperings of one boy. erched like a striped flag against the grudge grey sky.

ap p r ec iat es . R o n n ie k n o w s t h is . H ear s in n eg at iv e spaces and ampli ed acoustics.

he looks on with a

ut onnie knows better. J im

s m il es .

le andra hinea, C o n c ret e J un g l e, W at er c o l o r

103

Yinimi S t ay

Galego Mixed Media o n C ar db o ar d

104

HOLLOWED OUT Jialin Zhang

B r ig h t ey es , h o n ey - c o l o r ed s k in ;

it is t h e c h il dh o o d g am e ag ain

s u p p l e, w ar m , s o f t ,

w it h a dar k t w is t o f m al ic e,

n o t y et p r ey t o g r av it y

o f s p it e,

an d it s w eig h t .

o f b io l o g ic al b et r ay al .

H eal t h y .

E y es t u r n b l an k an d p al e s k in g r o w s as h y .

E n er g et ic , s l o w ed

H o b b l in g g au n t n es s .

s o l el y b y n at u r e. F u l l o f m ir t h , s h in in g g r in , a p l ay f u l t o u c h . G l o w in g .

U n k n o w in g o f w h at l ies in s ide h er o w n b o dy , L ies t o h er in h er o w n b o dy .

R edu c ed t o b o n es , s h e is h el d b y s t ic k s w h ic h u s ed t o h o u s e h er h ear t , b u t n o w o n ly h o l d du s t .

O f w h at â&#x20AC;&#x2122; s s it t in g in s ide w ait in g , m ade o f h er s el f , to make a flesh eater of herself.

F ro m

t h e c o u n t l es s t r eat m en t s

t h at s h o o k h er of her ruddy con dence,

B o dy dev o u r s b o dy in

s h e is l ef t a s h el l ,

a c h as e t h at c an n o t b e w o n ,

f r ag il e, an d b r eak ab l e.

a s eek er t h at c an n o t b e h idden f r o m :

C o n s u m ed.

Mar ia J o s e A y u s o , V ei n , c r ay o n an d in k

107

THE VESSEL OF LIFE Erin Gray

E v er y m o n t h I g r o w c l o s er , f ar t h er .

I t ’ s t h at t im e o f t h e m o n t h , ag ain . B u t w h en is it n o t ? I t al w ay s f eel s l ik e a w at er f al l , t h e r eo p en in g o f an u n h eal ed w o u n d, t h e deat h o f m y h ap p in es s an d des ir e. I am

I ’m

w it h in r eac h an d o v er c o m in g .

I am

f al l in g b eh in d an d s t u c k in t h e p as t .

very month am able to nd release. I c an el im in at e m y in s ec u r it ies an d em b r ac e w h at n at u r e f ait h f u l l y r et u r n s . I am

a v es s el o f l if e an d I am

o n ly

l im it ed b y m y o w n t h o u g h t s .

a r iv er o f r ed, s c ar l et , an d m ar o o n .

B l o o d.

R ef u s in g t o b e h el d in q u es t io n an d

T h e s o u r c e o f l if e, h ap p in es s an d s adn es s .

exam in at io n

B ar e.

o f an d b y

I ’m

O n l y t h e c o m f o r t o f b as k in g in m y s el f ,

a c av e, a m o u n t ain ,

. . . t h e o t h er s .

b r ig h t an d dar k ,

m y o w n w o r t h , in t h e c l ean s in g t h at

f u l l o f s ear c h an d w o n der .

o n l y I an p r o v ide, w il l ev er f r ee m e.

I am

m ir r o r ed in an at o m y ,

in r el at io n s , in m y s el f ,

I b an dag e m y n ev er - h eal in g w o u n d

in o t h er s .

in h o p es it w o n ’ t r eo p en ev er ag ain .

I n m en .

B u t w e b o t h k n o w it w il l .

108

L ee P iv n ik , Passiflora Corona, D ig it al P h o t o g r ap h y

109

THE WASHING OF FEET Jurissa Tellez

A s t h e h ig h s u n s et t l ed, an d t h e n im b u s c l o u ds r el eas ed T h e l u r k in g c r es c en t m o o n , t h e s k y t r an s f o r m ed F ro m

c o b al t b l u e t o f u c h s ia, y el l o w o c h r e, in dig o .

T h e w o m an , w ear y f r o m

w o r k an d t h e l o n g s t r in g o f day s ,

W al k ed h o m ew ar d w it h h er h eav y b o n es an d s o r e f eet , A s c r u t in iz in g c r o w d h o v er s ev er in h er ev en in g j o u r n ey ; I t p in c h es t h e ext r a p o u n ds o n h er w ais t an d t h ig h s â&#x20AC;&#x201C; I t t u g s at h er h air an d p o k es at h er ey es . H er em p t y h o m e ac c ep t ed t h e f adin g s u n , deep p u r p l e T ak in g o v er t h e p al e y el l o w , t h e r o o f l in e o f b l o o d b r o w n . A n d in t h e s t eam

o f s h o w er an d t h e w at er p o o l in g

A r o u n d h er f eet , s h e b r eat h ed a deep b r eat h . W as it a v o ic e s h e h ear d t h at w as h ed aw ay al l t h e t en s io n ? W

h at u n f o r g et t ab l e s o f t n es s r es t o r ed h er o w n em b r ac e? S h e n o l o n g er f el t t h e w eig h t o n h er b o n es â&#x20AC;&#x201D;i

n s t ead

S h e adm ir ed h er b ar e b o dy in ev er y m ir r o r ! T h e m o o n g r ew b r ig h t er , an d t h e in dig o s k y b r im m ed r o y al I n an o u t l in e t h e s h ap e o f h er ey es , h er l ip s , an d h er n o s e.

110

J u r is s a T el l ez , G o l d en G i rl , Mixed Media

111

TO THE HORIZON, BACK TO SHORE Isabell Manibusan B ar e- b r eas t ed w o m an S m o o th L ik e w o r n c av e w al l s B at h e in l u k ew ar m

w at er s

S p l as h t h eir r edden ed c h eek s A n d n ec k s W at er l ap s l et h ar g ic al l y W ar m

r ed w al l s

T h ey em er g e f r o m

w at er

A n d s l ip b ac k in t o B u t t o n ed s h ir t s S t r o n g r ip p l e- b ac k ed m en R o u g h L ik e t u r b u l en t s c ar l et s k ies S t r ip an d p l u n g e in t o Q u iet w at er s Men o n s h o r e P o in t T o w ar d t h e dis t an t h o r iz o n S o m et h in g is m en t io n ed o f f o r t n ig h t s A n d w o r n l eat h er s o l es A n d l ig h t en in g b u r n t m o u n t ain t o p s T h ey do n o t m en t io n s u p p l e ar m s o r t r u e t r eas u r es f ar f r o m l ik e dy in g em b er s

112

s k ies

Mail e T o r r es , Py ra m i d s , Mixed Media

113

114

I m an i C am p u z an o - G u ev ar a, D a n c i n g Q ueen , Mixed Media

A n dr ea A r an a, S ea T urt l es i n t h e S ea , A r c y l ic

J u r is s a T el l ez , R ed , A c r y l ic

115

Annmarie Raskin

WHEN I CAME INTO EXISTENCE

hen came into e istence, we moved clockwise delta waves and ngers in utero. ands pushed against red velvet lining with symptoms of salicylic acid. eet arched into relev put safety locks on everything. ploration ceased.

116

aile orres, K a a per, S h ei k h E l B el ed ,

i ed

edia

irrors with nger prints and stencils of lips. oor frames turned into y a es and marks grew higher. he creation of still frames, like ripping the legs off of spiders.

117

Mar c R es t r ep o , C h a o t i c C o n t ra ri et y , Mixed Media

118

WHITE BLANK PAGE Jeremy Ceballo G r as p it w it h y o u r h an ds , T as t e t h e h y p o c r it ic al s in c er it y o f T h e c an v as â&#x20AC;&#x2122; s al ab as t er b at t l eg r o u n d, S m o k y u n r el en t in g p er c o l at io n s o f t h e ab y s s ,

N o t t h e c o al , ir o n , s t eel , h eat t h at it s p aw n ed f r o m .

S h ar ds o f c h ar c o al dis g u is es as

S o o n y o u s h al l b e c ar v ed in t o t h is f ab r ic

T h e au t h o r s o f r eal it y

E n l ig h t en ed b y t h e b l in ded r eal it y o f t h es e m en .

S u p p o r t t h e f r am e Y et t h ey ar e al l b r o k en ,

T h e p il l ar s o f t h e u n k n o w n .

S l ic ed, E xh al e t h e b r eat h o f t r il l io n s o f m o l ec u l es

C u t-o u ts,

Min g l in g in ab s t r ac t io n c ar v ed u p o n a b l ac k b o ar d

O f im ag in in g s w e c em en t in t o do c t r in e,

Y o u ar e w h at t h ey s ee n o t w h at y o u f eel .

O f in t el l ig en c e c el eb r at ed o n t h e p r es t ig e o f

O b s idian f u r c h as es

A g al l er y .

H ide, m eat , Mu s c l e, b o n e

F r ag il e im ag in in g s an d c r in k l ed h an ds

Y o u ar e

C l u t c h at t h e el u s iv e, t h e s u r r eal , an d t h e p as s io n

H o o v es , b en t l im b s ,

T h at c an n o t b e c o n t r o l l ed b y

B u lk , h o r n s .

S p ider w eb s o f h u m an f ab r ic at io n .

U n h in g ed, u n aes t h et ic , u n b r o k en , u n r eg im en t ed,

I m ag es t h at w al l o w in dar k n es s

B u t im b u ed b y m ean in g an d s t im u l at ed b y f at e

h it e b l an k p ag e n o t t ain t ed b y f al s it y ,

C ir c u l at e t h e s m o k e o f s u r r eal is m ; Q u es t io n t h e ar c an eâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;t

h ew h y ?

A s h ado w y c o w in a g al l er y ,

Y o u g az e at t h e t r u n k c r o w n ed w it h

P ier c ed b y t h e p er c ep t io n s o f h u m an it y .

A n iv o r y b ead,

G r as p it w it h y o u r h o o v es ,

A p ear l dip p ed in h u m an it y ,

T as t e t h e il l u s io n o f y o u r o w n f at e.

S at u r at ed w it h ideas o f w h at is an d c an n o t b e.

S t ar e it do w n :

T h is m o n u m en t is w h at t h ey s ay it is .

Y o u r r eal it y . 119

D y l an Mat am o r o s , Purrpee, D ig it al P h o t o g r ap h y

120

D N O

S E IT

M A I D Da

T h is t o h an ds t o w h ic h p in c h o u r m in ds , an d g l o v es w h ic h s t r an g l e p o u n din g h ear t s — r el eas e—a

n d l et t h e s t r in g u n w in d;

let our kites fly off to different parts. O n w in ds w h ic h w h ir l an d w af t ‘ f o r e n o o n s l idin g o u r diam o n d k it es do w n t h e dr eam ; A g ain w e s p ak e an d s p o k e t o o s o o n the lies we dream are things that seem. O n w in ds , w e w is h t h at w e w er e l o v in g , and yet, our minds, our sails—adrift, dip p in g , t u r n in g , w eav in g , s w ir l in g , t h e diam o n d div es ag ain —b

er ef t

o f s eem in g dr eam s t h o s e h an ds h av e s t o l en , and eyes gloves cover—bloated, swollen.

121

Jurissa Tellez Mixed Media

Elysium Literary & Art Magazine 2013

Coral Reef High School

Volume XII