INCOMPLETION.
(MYP PERSONAL PROJECT) ARRANGED BY: EMILY WANG
Thank you to all the amazing contributing female artists & writers! INSIDE: Emily Wang Raheela S. Sunflower Sanchez Darcy Park Atabex Cintr贸n Lux Vitae Dara Sontan Jennifer Duan Jemima Sapang Ljubi Gallardo
2
little girl on pebble beach, 2014. E.W.
A Secret. Hissing fawnI am the arrow, I have Slain your mother Ten thousand times over. This embryo is Disappointment, it is a given. And an unloving diagnosis left Festering, for an instant. E.W
4
listen to me, i am not her i am not the child you wanted i am not the girl's name that he chewed with the back of his teeth i cannot tell you that i have not felt self conscious knowing the ceiling is watching me in my sleep. this girl i do not hush like her i do not talk like her i do not cry like her i am only covered in what you have said about her listen to me, do not shame me do not pray for me to vanish because i did not ask for him to swallow me whole. R
iMessage today: 15:58 //i want you to look at me and smile rly wide and think of everything good in life and i want you, to tell me, that i am your weekend, about how amazing i am, i want you to realize how amazing i am except that you know you already know you told me you thought i’m the greatest person ever and you are so fucking right so, so why am i stuck with a number two pencil in between the fingers of my right hand, trembling, crying onto 2x+8y=24, why are you stuck down at your house down the road why can’t you be attached to my hip, i am a man, holding it all, i can’t even breathe, what are you doing what are you even doing what are you doing you are writing me a memoir of my smile and my words and my life and probably shaking in your seat because damn, i am beautiful, damn you missed out except that you haven’t because i am still waiting for you to tell me what i want to hear. sorry that i am so selfish sorry i want you so bad but notice i don’t need you anymore i never really needed you because i am fucking okay, i am okay, i want you and i don’t care anymore i want you and i don’t care!! because i will want you until my heart implodes and my eyeballs fall out and my bones decay or at least until i find someone else to make me feel like a diamond, you smell like laundry and sunshine and you are like an itch, please go away, you’re making me look red, and you are like the weekend, i never want you to end, please don’t go away, i want to be your weekend. / > -ss
6
(D.P)
This is a road where I remember "Two roads diverged by a yellow wood" One line separates from the harsh reality to the fantasy we crave We inject ourselves with imagination to travel across Prescribed by the things we need in order to face the truth Truth about how we precept our lives About how careless society is J.S The rain has to stop The sky needs to clear It's blurring my perspective destinations never seem near The pounding against the window Deafening in all sense The noises around me Aren't acting like a fence Instead they join the orchestra in my head Maybe if I can just close it all out it will stop. It doesn't. It never will L.G
Stab me Your words hurt the most Physical scars even out Words are forever A.C
8
i moved my couch out of the living room because it seemed, you see every time i worked up the energy, the courage to pull myself from the safety of my bed i was sucked back in i moved my couch out of my house and i learned hardwood floors are much more comfortable when you can’t feel anything but sadness i tore up the floorboards, threw them in the creek and learned the sores on my skin from the cement didn’t hurt as much when my entire body was numbed by the cold i went outside and i slept in the dirt i made friends with the worms and the beetles that greeted me though i am now six feet under carving this into my rotting skin with a rusted nail from my casket that is much more comfortable than the cement even though i again made friends with the worms and beetles feasting on my flesh i realize now that i should have kept the couch in the living room. -(this casket is more inviting than you ever were)
10
“BROWN GIRL, BROWN GIRL, TURN YOUR SH*T DOWN! YOU KNOW AMERICA DON’T WANNA HEAR YOUR SOUND…” M.I.A.
Walked All Over Listen closely Never learn still Do all kind things Against your good will. Wait patiently Be left behind Search it out Some other finds. Speak softly Receive tongue's fire Tell only truth Hear words of liars. Take all at great worth. Become stomped dust of Earth. D.S
12
Fantasy never quite mixed with reality, It was difficult remembering that, As two very familiar eyes met, Unspoken words held at the tip of their tongue, Time stopped, only for a mere second. The fate trope was at play, or so it seemed. Nothing but looks of recognition They parted ways with no confrontation, Fear of rejection and such, The inevitable disappointment followed. Who knew it began with three words, “Stay with me.� J.D
14
‌She came to him as no more than a glimpse of something bright and seemingly impossible to grasp.
16
‌To be continued.
18