Can solitude really be sweet?

Ciara Allen offers her advice on learning to love your alone time

As Ferris Bueller probably put it best, ‘life moves pretty fast – if you don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.’ Nowadays, there is a lot of pressure put on us to be social butterflies, keeping ourselves and our days busy. Spending time alone is almost looked down on, and feelings of shame or FOMO can creep in. The coronavirus lockdowns have meant that we are spending more time alone than ever and we have been reintroduced to our most important relationship: with ourselves. Taking a step back and starting to enjoy being in your own company is more important now than ever as a crucial act of self-love and self-acceptance.

What makes you happy?

Being alone is the perfect time to explore what makes you happy, as it is a time dedicated entirely to yourself and free from external pressures or opinions that may influence you and your actions. ‘Guilty pleasures’ do not exist; if it makes you truly happy doing it, that is what is most important. Rediscover old hobbies – read that book that you have been meaning to for months! Alternatively, why not learn something new? Listen to a podcast on a topic you know nothing about, start learning a language or learn to cook. Find solace in old hobbies, but you never know what else is out there.

Journaling

Potentially the most introspective of hobbies, lockdown is the perfect time to start a journal. Write down anything and everything – don’t worry about how good the content is as, after all, who is going to read it but you? Your journal is entirely personal; the subject matter is whatever you decide and, therefore, it is the perfect tool to take a deep dive into your mind and spend time exploring yourself. It’s a time dedicated exclusively to self-reflection, helping you to become in tune with yourself and strengthening your sense of self-identity. Don’t censor yourself, start writing and see what you find!

Exercise

As well as improving physical wellbeing, exercise is incredibly important for maintaining our mental health – taking us out of the thinking mind and grounding us in the present. Daily walks are massively beneficial in helping to centre yourself and slow down the pace of your mind – allowing time for selfreflection. You can accompany your walk with music or an audiobook, or simply let your mind wander.

Self-care

We must not feel pressured to be productive during this time alone! Pandemics are exhausting and emotionally draining, and the pressure to learn new skills and emerge from lockdown as a ‘new and improved’ version of yourself can be damaging. Remember to take time for yourself; this could be as simple as a face mask with a cup of tea and your favourite book. Or it could be having a shower, getting out of the pyjamas you’ve worn for two days and making a home-cooked meal. Being alone gets rid of external pressures dictating how your life should look, and lets you look inwards at what makes you happy (after all, the only opinion that matters is your own). Self-care during the pandemic is about more than creating a healthy relationship with yourself; it’s about caring for your emotional and physical wellbeing in a time of incredible stress.