The kindness of strangers

Isobel Edmondson fondly reflects on an unexpected encounter

About a year ago, before the pandemic and the day after I returned to uni after the Christmas holidays, I woke up on a sunny morning and thought it would be the perfect day to take a walk to the Clifton Suspension Bridge. I expect- ed nothing out of the ordinary to happen and planned to head to the library after- wards. I stuck my headphones on and set off – little did I know how this day would leave a lasting mark on me to this day.

When I arrived, I sat down and stared into the distance, absorbed in my cyclical thoughts and not really paying attention to the podcast I was listening to.

I must have looked a bit low (I have a self-diagnosed case of ‘resting bitch face’) because a woman (let’s call her Julie) came and sat by me. For a moment she didn’t say anything but then she asked if I was okay. Julie had approached me because she said I looked reflective.

She wasn’t wrong, but I probably wasn’t thinking of anything too profound – maybe my to-do list or how long I should en- dure my disappointing choice of podcast. I told her I was fine and just admiring the view.

I understood why Julie had come over. We talked about the sad associations with students and the bridge and then went onto topics like where I’m from, what I’m studying, etc. Her husband, Peter, joined the conver- sation and to my surprise, suggested that I joined them for lunch.

I thought they were just being polite – we didn’t know each other after all, but I agreed because I knew I’d regret it if I didn’t. I was caught off-guard by their offer but there was no harm in being spon- taneous. The idea of not having to cook my own lunch with the less-than-inspir- ing ingredients I had in my flat was also rather appealing, it must be said!

We had soup in a cosy café and we talked about our lives. It was fascinating to hear their stories; I realised that I had never had a proper conversation with a Bristolian before and had met few people here outside of the student age bracket. Without trying to be dramatic, it felt like something from a book or film.

They were full of advice and encouragement for people I had only met about half an hour ago; Peter told me that it was okay to not know what I was doing and that life is to be enjoyed. They made me feel truly seen and heard, which is rare when you’re surrounded by a huge sea of students. It’s easy to feel anonymous, especially in first year when you’re still settling into a new life.

Epigram / Eve Coleman

Julie said that I had a lovely smile, which was refreshing after being told by random men on the street to ‘cheer up, love’ (yes, this still happens in this decade). It’s as if they had a sixth sense for what I needed at that point.

Their words echoed in my mind for weeks, giving me a noticeable spring in my step. Julie and I exchanged numbers and when I arrived home, I almost questioned if I had imagined the entire after- noon. We kept in contact and a few weeks later I met Julie again for coffee.

What could’ve been another day in the stuffy library turned into an inspiring start to the new term. If I had returned to Bristol a day later or stayed in my lit- tle dorm room, I would not have had this uplifting experience. I now realise that it is precisely what I needed as I was feeling more down than I wanted to admit.

It is even more profound to consider that this couple could have saved someone’s life that day if I had needed more serious help, and I wouldn’t be surprised if they have.

I’m sharing this story to encourage peo- ple to connect with those who look lost or upset because you never know what they are going through. You could even be ex- periencing something similar to them. It doesn’t matter if you don’t know them – though it goes without saying that you shouldn’t put yourself in danger – you could be exactly what someone needs at that moment.

Epigram / Eve Coleman

I am also writing this to encourage people to get outside if they are feeling down. I know everything is a lot more restricted with lockdown measures and can be easi- er said than done, but just being outside reminds you that there are so many other lives that are completely different to your own; each person with their unique set of problems. It might help put things into perspective.

It is so beneficial to physically step out- side of the uni bubble and to connect with the outside world. Who knows who you might meet, and how you could alter each other’s lives for the better.