UKMJ - Issue 14 by Iconic Media Solutions

Welcome to Issue 14 UK Mediation Journal & Conference

Welcome to Issue 14 of the UK Mediation Journal. We’d like to take this opportunity to thank our contributors, sponsors and subscribers for their continued support and dedication to advocating ADR and mediation. Our commitment to provide those in the workplace with the skills and contacts to mediate and offer effective training is unwavering.

We’d also like to take the opportunity to welcome you to UK Mediation Conference 2024Managing Conflict in the Workplace. The event is presented by Iconic Media Solutions, Acas and event partner The TCM Group with the aim of bringing together HR professionals, leaders and experts in ADR to better understand managing workplace conflict.

Sessions delivered by Acas, The TCM Group, Nicky Perfect, Consensio, Mia Forbes Pirie, Sheridan Worldwide, CommPassion, IPOS Mediation and Tutu Foundation UK.

We hope you enjoy the day and find the content both insightful and practical. We look forward to seeing you at future conferences!

Craig Kelly, Publisher

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Inside:

5. Getting engaged at work

9. Small Businesses, Big Challenges: Trailblazing a Resolution Revolution for SMEs

12. Addressing the skills gap beyond mediation: Shifting the power to employees

15. Bridging Minds: Navigating Neurodiversity in Conflict Resolution

19. Directory of Mediation & Training Providers

27. UK Mediation Conference Show Guide

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@UKMediationJournal

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Whilst every care has been taken in compiling this publication, and the statements contained herein are believed to be correct, the publishers do not accept any liability or responsibility for inaccuracies or omissions. Reproduction of any part of this publication is strictly forbidden. We do not endorse, nor is Iconic Media Solutions Ltd affiliated with any company or organisation listed within. It is advised before appointing a mediator or trainer that you carry out your own quality and competence checks.

How to resolve workplace conflict

Everyone can resolve conflicts when they are empowered to create their own solutions. Sheridan Worldwide works globally to help people and organisations communicate effectively and strengthen working relationships by:

How to solve workplace conflict?

Focusing on team dynamics through honest and candid conversation coaching

Providing strategic consulting to support a shift to a resolution culture The provision of expert workplace and employment mediators Conflict resolution and mediation skills for managers and leaders

Providing strategic consulting to support a shift to a resolution culture

“Sheridan Worldwide had a hugely positive impact on our organisation and on the parties who engaged in mediation following a relationship breakdown.”

The provision of expert workplace and employment mediators Conflict resolution and mediation skills for managers and leaders

Hannah Coulson, Chief Human Resources Officer, Callastone

“Sheridan Worldwide had a hugely positive impact on our organisation and on the parties who engaged in mediation following a relationship breakdown.”

Hannah Coulson, Chief Human Resources Officer, Callastone

Getting engaged at work

By Sheridan Worldwide

The question of how to engage employees in mediation as a route to resolution of their grievances is one for both HR and the mediator alike. Sometimes engagement will be full and immediate but at least as often, participation will initially be secured through managerial or organisational pressure to mediate, and the actual participation may be reluctant, half-hearted or outright sceptical.

The same is true for organisations. When first faced with the suggestion of mediation, and despite its many attractions relative to a formal process (speed, cost, flexibility, focus on preservation of relationships, etc), they may stall – “it’s not in our procedures”, “the unions won’t like it”, “Acas says we can’t do it”, “we’ve never done it before”, “examples must be made”, and so on. It is of course completely right that not every dispute at work can or should be mediated. It is

also true that few grievance procedures currently provide expressly for it. But it is not true that the Acas Code of Practice prevents employers suggesting mediation as a first response to a complaint rather than as an outcome from it, and it is not usually true that modern union representatives will object to it, since they know as well as you do that in reality, their members’ best interests lie in protecting and rebuilding workplace relationships, not in tub-thumping rhetoric almost guaranteed to destroy them.

But commerciality, pragmatism, cost and so on tend to speak more loudly to businesses than to individuals since for them a grievance or allegation is often personal, something affecting how they may be seen by others and indeed by themselves. Formal grievances and disputes almost always polarise the parties – “I am entirely right and

Caroline Sheridan

David Whincup

he is entirely wrong” – where in reality that is very rarely the case. If you believe that your conduct or performance has been beyond reproach, why would you not wait for the formal process to vindicate you and grind your opponent’s face in it?

Alternatively, in the heightened emotional state which often accompanies workplace complaints, why would you believe HR’s assurances that the other side to the mediation will respect your confidentiality? Why would you be willing to open up to the mediator about what really matters to you in the dispute if you think it will be used against you afterwards?

Maybe you are bringing your complaint as an issue of principle, to ensure that its subject is punished, ideally publicly, for what you say they have done? Where is the attraction then of a discreet process covered by a blanket confidentiality obligation?

It may just be that you are scared. Scared of having to talk to the other person, of being less calm or coherent than they are and so less persuasive to the mediator, of retaliation afterwards, or that they will blind you with clever legal arguments and tie you up in knots in the questions they may pose.

There are lots of such reasons available for a worker’s not engaging properly (or at all) when mediation is suggested for a workplace dispute. But most of them are very weak and it is the role of HR and the mediator to present the process in a way which shows that to be the case. Here are some possible responses to those concerns:

“I am right and he is wrong”

• Emphasise the benefits and the unique aspects of mediation to appeal to their sense of fairness and resolution.

• Unique opportunity to express perspectives in a controlled environment to allow parties to feel heard. Mediators work hard to surface the real reasons behind the conflict and find areas of common ground

• Focuses on finding a mutually agreeable solution based on interests and needs and more likely to secure some form of acknowledgement than in a formal process.

• Passes back control, responsibility and decision-making to the parties to agree a way forward.

• Raise the possibility that the formal process finds that there is some culpability on the part of the complainant also and therefore that the vindication they seek is not on the table after all. What will they do then?

Confidentiality protections

• Reference the mediation agreement and that confidentiality is a cornerstone of the process. Where a breach of confidentiality occurs, it can be treated by the employer as misconduct.

• Protected by law, meaning that what is said is without prejudice and cannot be used in court.

• The process differs from a formal grievance where a larger number of people may be involved and aware, and where the confidentiality obligations are weaker.

• Provides a safe space where parties can speak openly and express their concerns, without fear of judgment, in the

presence of a trained mediator who is also committed to these principles.

Issue

of principle: I want the other ‘punished’

• Understanding their underlying motivations: show them how mediation can lead to outcomes that address their core concerns or unmet needs, not just surface-level issues. Isn’t the important thing that the issue is addressed or the relevant conduct stops going forwards, rather than exactly how that is achieved?

• Focus on solutions, not punishment: emphasise that mediation is about finding solutions rather than assigning blame or punishment and explore benefits of that shift in mindset. How will the complainant feel if the formal process does not lead to the sanction that they hope?

• Confirm that the mediation route does not mean that anyone “gets away with” anything – if it is felt by the employer that disciplinary action is necessary to make the necessary changes, it can still be taken. But that is a decision for the employer to make, not the employee raising the complaint.

• Mediation fosters an environment to re-build trust and cooperation which can be more productive than a punitive approach and lead to longer term benefits. How will they work with the other person in future if it becomes clear that the complainant placed sanction above pragmatic resolution?

• The parties take control of the resolution process to find mutually agreeable solutions which is more empowering than relying on external authorities to impose punishment.

Fear and lack of confidence

• Use active listening to surface concerns and anxieties. The flexibility of the process then allows mediation to be tailored, e.g., spread over several days, private sessions with the mediator, use of breaks, timing of joint sessions and of opening statements, and other strategies to reduce the pressure of the process.

• Reassurance that the mediator is always present in joint sessions so they are ‘not alone’ and encouraging the use of less provocative ‘I’ statements to express their feelings and needs.

• Understanding that the parties may exit the process at any time, though the mediator should also contract up front to say “that is when I’ll likely be asking you to stay”, as it can typically be a point of breakthrough.

• Check if the right parties are in the room, maybe look to engage the line manager in the process too.

• Consider allowing or even encouraging the party to be accompanied by a friend or colleague, not necessarily to take any active role, but at least to provide a level of moral support “in their room”.

• HR can accept that mediation won’t be easy but emphasise at the same time that it will certainly be less stressful for the complainant than a formal contested grievance process.

ICONIC MEDIA SOLUTIONS

Our live events portfolio of conferences and exhibitions brings together leading Government officials, trade organisations, business leaders, industry experts, thought leaders and trade associations. Amassing the most relevant and high profile delegates, our events offer highly targeted environments to network and conduct business. Whether you would like to find out more information about scheduled events or would like to discuss event partnerships please get in touch.

Conflict and disputes are an inevitable feature of the odern workplace. Are you seeking a simpler and more ective approach to turn them into positive outcomes?

This worked best for us because the service offers both a quick turnaround for cases and extensive aftercare. Their outsourced mediation scheme nipped stuff in the bud early.

Conflict and disputes are an inevitable feature of the modern workplace. Are you seeking a simpler, more effective approach to turn them into positive outcomes?

Resolution (UKR) is the UK’s national ‘all in one’ HR nsultancy and resolution centre for the discerning small d medium-sized business.

UK Resolution is the UK’s national resolution centre.

r resolution services are uniquely tailored to support SMEs, mily-run businesses, charities, social enterprises and small blic bodies such as GPs schools and parish councils

Our resolution services are uniquely tailored to support SMEs, family-run businesses, charities, social enterprises and small public bodies such as GPs schools and parish councils

working with UKR, customers have access to a panel of rld-leading HR professionals, mediators, investigators, aches and lawyers. So, no matter the challenge, you’ll have expert support on-hand to resolve issues as they come.

By working with UKR, customers have access to a panel of world-leading HR professionals, mediators, investigators, coaches and lawyers. So, no matter the challenge, you’ll have expert support on-hand to resolve issues as they come.

Guaranteed mediation services using our innovative ‘ no win-win, no fee’ approach. Innovative HR policies and management processes that reduce the risk of damaging grievances and costly tribunals. and extensive aftercare Their outsourced mediation scheme nipped stuff in the bud early.

Flexible and cost-effective HR and employment law support when you need it most 24-hour resolution helpline dedicated to keeping you and your business out of court.

Flexible and cost-effective HR and employment law support when you need it most 24-hour resolution helpline dedicated to keeping you and your business out of court

Multi award-winning dispute resolution system - The Resolution Index™. This is being used by Next, TSB Bank, Aviva, Burberry, HSBC and the BBC.

Multi award-winning dispute resolution system - The Resolution Index™ This is being used by Next, TSB Bank, Aviva, Burberry, HSBC and the BBC.

Prompt resolution of a wide range of business, commercial and workplace disputes.

Guaranteed mediation services using our innovative ‘ no win-win, no fee’ approach.

Innovative HR policies and management processes that reduce the risk of damaging grievances and costly tribunals

Janine Hodge, ER Specialist

Janine Hodge, ER Specialist Partner at the Met office

Small Businesses, Big Challenges: Trailblazing a Resolution Revolution for SMEs

By David Liddle, CEO and Founder, The TCM Group

It’s no secret that conflict can be a business killer. According to Acas, workplace conflict costs UK employers an eye-watering £28.5 billion a year, equating to £1,000 per employee. That’s money most companies, especially small and medium-sized businesses (SMEs), simply can’t afford to lose. But it’s not just about the financial hit.

Think about the toll on employee morale, engagement, and mental wellbeing. The CPP found that 29% of employees have been dealing with continual conflict that can escalate into personal attacks, and a significant 85% have experienced some form of conflict at work in their careers. A CIPD report further reveals that 42% of those who experienced workplace conflict in the previous 12 months said they ‘always’ or ‘frequently’ felt exhausted, and 37% said they always or often felt under pressure.

What if we could change that narrative? What if we could nurture the ability to turn conflict into an opportunity

for collaboration and growth, particularly in a business’ infancy? That’s exactly what we’re striving for with UK Resolution (UKR)

A Transformative HR Consultancy

Through our flagship brand, The TCM Group, we’ve always b een passionate about transforming how organisations manage conflict. It’s evidenced in the 93% successful outcome rate we’ve achieved between parties through mediation and facilitation. Recently, it’s been encouraging to see an increasing number of clients move through our developing ecosystem; for instance, those who understand the benefits of tying in mediation with conflict coaching.

But with the launch of UKR, our new HR consultancy and national resolution centre designed specifically for smaller businesses, we’re more excited than ever. Why ? Because we know the incredible difference this offering is going to make for companies that might not have the resources or

David Liddle

time to effectively handle workplace disputes on their own.

We’ve created something truly special, a powerful solution that gives SMEs, family businesses and small public bodies such as schools, parish councils and GPs alike the tools and strategies to navigate conflict in ways that foster growth, respect, and resilience.

HR Processes that Pack a Punch

We know how overwhelming conflict can be, especially for smaller businesses and third sector organisations that don’t have a big HR department or a dedicated conflict resolution team. So, we’ve created a system that isn’t just about quick fixes and putting out fires; it’s about transforming the way businesses manage conflict from the inside out. And we’ve designed it with the unique challenges of a smaller organisation in mind.

One of the key components of our approach is The Resolution Index™ — a tool we’re particularly excited about. It’s like having your very own conflict expert in your pocket, ready to triage each case and recommend the most effective resolution strategy. Whether the issue is a minor misunderstanding or a major conflict, The Resolution Index™ evaluates it based on metrics like duration, severity, past resolution attempts, and potential risks. This ensures that nothing slips through the cracks and that each case gets the attention it deserves.

After all, it’s easy and common for any size organisation to lose track of things. But our intuitive casework hub dashboard further helps solve this by keeping everything organised, providing real-time updates on the progress of each case for data-driven decision-making. This transparency and ease of use is something we’re incredibly proud of. It makes handling conflicts feel a lot less mind-boggling f or

businesses, especially those that don’t have time to chase down the details themselves.

A Tailored, Personal Approach

UKR offers a truly personalised approach that SMEs have never really had access to before. We don’t believe in a onesize-fits-all for the customer. Instead, after the triage process using The Resolution Index™, we recommend the best course of action from our suite of resolution services — whether that’s mediation, conflict coaching, team facilitation, or formal investigations. What’s more, customers uniquely have access to a panel of world-leading HR professionals, mediators, investigators, coaches and lawyers that would be typically reserved for larger organisations.

It’s about getting the right people involved at the right time to nip conflict in the bud before it does any real damage. And doing so with utmost fairness, objectivity and compassion at the same time.

“ It worked best for us because the service offers both a quick turnaround for cases and extensive aftercare. Their outsourced mediation scheme nipped stuff in the bud early. ”

Janine Hodge, ER Specialist at The Met Office

Moreover, where conflict and disputes are traditionally rooted in shame and avoidance, this personalisation and flexibility is key for the parties’ willingness and engagement during the route to resolution process. We’re there as a trusted partner should they need further guidance and aftercare following any actions.

“Their approach at developing fair, just, sustainable and high performing organisations and the time they take to truly understand our needs has meant their interventions have been incredibly well received.

”

Rachel Cooper, L&D Manager at Amnesty International

Navigating Conflict & Employment Law

On top of the challenges conflict creates, navigating the ever-changing landscape of employment law adds another layer of complexity for small businesses. As Labour’s new Employment Rights Bill comes into effect on 26 October 2024, with 28 individual employment reforms including updates on flexible working rights, redundancy processes, and harassment prevention, small businesses are under more pressure than ever to ensure compliance. This is where things can get really tricky, especially for organisations without an in-house legal or HR department.

For start-ups and other small businesses, the stakes are high. Mishandling disputes can lead to costly tribunals, damaged reputations, and strained relationships with employees. That’s why it’s crucial to have a resolution framework that doesn’t just deal with conflict effectively but helps you negotiate legal challenges in line with the latest requirements as well.

The Time for Change Is Now

We’re biased, but we can’t help but feel thrilled about the potential impact UK Resolution is going to have. Imagine a workplace where conflict doesn’t simmer under the surface,

where it’s addressed swiftly and fairly, and where employees feel heard and valued. A workplace where conflict isn’t destructive, but rather a catalyst for a culture of trust, innovation and deeper connections between team members.

For SMEs, this really can be revolutionary. Embedding a culture of proactive conflict management before a business potentially scales up is a critical ingredient for ensuring longterm success. By fostering empathy and mutual respect, we’re helping businesses not only resolve conflicts but adopt a forward-thinking approach that prevents them from happening in the first place. And we can guarantee that as a result, the output and the talent that subsequently walks through the door will get increasingly more astounding.

If you’re ready to shift how your business manages conflict, we’d love to partner with you on that journey. Let’s talk about how UK Resolution can help you build a more resilient, harmonious workplace — where conflict isn’t feared, but embraced as a positive opportunity.

Find out more at ukresolution.com, or get in touch with us at info@thetcmgroup.com and let’s start building a workplace that thrives through resolution.

Addressing the skills gap beyond mediation: Shifting the power to employees

By Alexandra Efthymiades and Anna Shields, Directors and Co-founders of Consensio

Arecent report from the Chartered Institute of Personnel and Development (CIPD)* highlighted two important findings: a significant gap in conflict resolution skills, and a marked divide between employers and employees.

Based on data from more than 2,000 employers and 5,000 employees in the UK, the report confirmed that conflict is a common occurrence in the workplace, with 25% of employees reporting that they have experienced conflict or abuse in the last 12 months. These statistics are not unexpected, as they back up a CIPD study from 2019, and align with our experience as workplace mediators and conflict management professionals.

What is surprising, however, is the significant disconnect between staff and leaders. While 75% of employers reported that employees feel confident to raise issues, this confidence is not reflected in employee data. Among those who experience conflict, only 17% felt confident to have an informal conversation with the person involved, and only 29% discussed their conflict with a manager or HR. Nearly half (47%) of surveyed employees said they took no action and ‘just let it go.’

When workplace conflict is left unaddressed, it impacts individuals, teams, and the wider organisation. It can affect the health and well-being of individuals, reduce engagement, and decrease productivity. It sometimes leads to formal processes or legal cases, which are time-consuming and costly, and which usually further damage already broken relationships.

One fundamental challenge for many organisations is that decision-making in relation to conflict – including the skills to manage and resolve disputes informally – is often limited to a

few people. These people are usually HR specialists, and in some cases, in-house mediators, facilitators or conflict coaches. In this model, the ‘power’ of conflict management and resolution is held by the few rather than the many. If organisations want to shift their conflict culture, they need to look at different and broader ways to upskill their workforce.

There are some useful ways to redress this imbalance in conflict skills within your organisation:

Equip line managers with conflict resolution skills

One of the CIPD report’s main findings is the crucial role that line managers play. Although employers are confident in line management capability, nearly half agreed that managers can be a cause of conflict in their teams. This is why managers need to be upskilled to learn to confidently address workplace conflict issues effectively and informally.

When managers are trained in conflict management skills, they are more able to nip conflict in the bud, develop better people management skills, and support stronger team relationships. When managers are aware of their conflict style and communication preferences, they can better understand how their own and others’ behaviours are contributing to a potential relationship breakdown

Recognise conflict proficiency as a strategic priority

The next step in closing the skills gap is for leaders to prioritise conflict skills in organisational development. It is helpful for leaders

Anna Shields

Alexandra Efthymiades

to understand the conflict landscape in their organisation by analysing employee feedback and ensuring that processes are in place to aid informal resolution, such as facilitation, internal mediation, and conflict coaching. The conflict culture is set by leaders who role-model constructive conflict behaviours, and informally act on issues as soon as they arise.

This approach has many advantages, including reducing the costs of unresolved conflict and formal processes. Dealing with issues early decreases management and HR time, which allows resources to be deployed elsewhere.

Unlocking the real value

In an enlightened workplace, everyone is empowered to deal with conflict issues. If organisational processes solely rely on a small number of HR and conflict specialists to deal with challenging workplace relationships, then the workforce as a whole is not able to learn how to manage their own conflicts. This partly explains the rise in formal processes that many organisations are experiencing; people expect someone else to sort things out for them because they don’t feel skilled, confident or empowered to do this on their own.

The opportunity lies in training individuals across the whole organisation to try to manage conflict on their own, or with the support of a manager. It may be unrealistic to expect everyone to address issues directly themselves. However, when support is provided to everyone in an organisationsuch as online conflict resources, open-access and live

training, or having the support to speak with someone about a conflict - it enables people to act on their own. This allows people to take action and feel a sense of control and personal agency.

Leaders often see the sharp end of conflict – the tribunal or legal case, the number of formal complaints, the percentage of churn – and that is just the tip of the iceberg. For most organisations, the steps to close the skills gap are within reach. Organisations that disseminate conflict skills will reduce the negative impact of unresolved conflict and benefit from the opportunities that constructive conflict brings, such as stronger relationships, innovation, and increased wellbeing and productivity, which helps to build future-fit employees.

References * How employers are tackling bullying and harassment at work. (CIPD, 2024).

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Bridging Minds: Navigating Neurodiversity in Conflict Resolution

By Marie Coombes, CEO, We Restore Calm

nterpersonal conflict is inherently complex, and when neurodiversity is a factor, conflicts can become even more nuanced. Neurodivergent individuals bring unique strengths to interactions but may experience and process conflict differently from their neurotypical counterparts, facing challenges rooted in cognitive, emotional, and sensory processing differences. For mediators, understanding these variations in communication styles, sensory sensitivities, and emotional regulation is crucial for navigating conflicts with greater empathy and effectiveness. As a mediator recently diagnosed

with ADHD and Dyspraxia , alongside my longstanding Irlen Syndrome , I’ve gained insight into these dynamics through personal experience. Reflecting on my journey, I recognise how sensory overload, task initiation difficulties, and emotional dysregulation have, at times, led to burnout, strained interactions, and missed deadlines, causing anger, frustration, and disappointment for those around me. This experience has deepened my empathy for others facing similar challenges and strongly informs my mediation approach. Recognising and respecting neurodivergent perspectives enables us to encourage more meaningful and transformative conflict resolution.

Marie Coombes

Source: Shutterstock

Here are five key considerations for mediators to support neurodivergent individuals in conflict transformation and promote understanding and respect in every interaction.

1. Communication Styles Can Amplify or Mitigate Conflict

Conflict often intensifies when communication styles clash, and this is especially relevant when working with neurodivergent individuals who may communicate differently from their neurotypical counterparts. Neurodivergent people may prefer clear, direct, and low-context communication, where words mean exactly what they say without relying on implicit cues or “reading between the lines.” However, neurotypical individuals may use more hyperbole or contextdependent language, leading to misunderstandings and frustration on both sides. For instance, someone with ADHD might struggle to focus on long, detailed conversations, potentially missing key points or coming across as distracted. Those on the autism spectrum may rely on literal language, which could be misinterpreted as blunt or lacking in empathy by others.

Mediators should remain mindful of these differences and first adapt their own communication approach before, during, and after mediation. They can then facilitate effective communication in the room by encouraging all parties to clarify their intentions, build understanding, listen actively, and avoid making assumptions. By setting these standards, mediators help minimise misinterpretations and foster an atmosphere of mutual respect.

2. Cognitive Processing Differences Can Affect Conflict Perception

Neurodivergent individuals often bring distinctive cognitive processing styles that influence how they perceive and respond to conflict. For instance, individuals with autism may approach issues with a logical, detail-oriented perspective, focusing on facts and concrete evidence. In contrast, those with ADHD might respond more intensely in high-stress situations, especially when confronted with emotional conflict or complex information. Even listening behaviours can differ: fidgeting or stimming, common in neurodivergent individuals, is often misinterpreted by neurotypical parties as a lack of attention when in fact, these actions can aid focus and active listening in a neurodivergent context.

Source: Shutterstock

While everyone has a unique frame of reference, these processing differences introduce an added layer of complexity grounded in neurological function rather than solely lived experience. Recognising and addressing these distinctions is essential for effective conflict resolution, enabling all parties to be understood and engaged meaningfully in the process.

Mediators already play a crucial role in helping each party appreciate these perceptual differences, allowing them to view the conflict from multiple perspectives. However, unpacking these dynamics requires deeper curiosity, patience, and focus. This approach builds empathy and helps prevent unnecessary escalation driven by cognitive misunderstandings.

3. Sensory Sensitivities Can Escalate Tensions

Many neurodivergent individuals experience heightened sensory sensitivity, contributing to their stress container and exacerbating conflict, especially in high-stimulus environments. For example, people with ADHD or autism may feel overwhelmed by loud noises, bright lights, or crowded spaces. In conflict situations, these sensory sensitivities can heighten emotions and make it more challenging for neurodivergent individuals to focus on problem-solving.

Understanding and accommodating sensory needs can significantly enhance a mediator’s effectiveness in conflict resolution. The environment plays a crucial role; this may involve selecting quieter, more neutral settings with plenty of natural light for in-person mediation or offering virtual options, allowing neurodivergent parties to control their surroundings. By creating a sensory-friendly atmosphere, mediators help neurodivergent individuals engage more fully, reducing the added stress that sensory overload can introduce into a conflict situation.

4. Emotional Regulation Challenges Can Impact Conflict Responses

Neurodivergent individuals may face unique challenges with emotional regulation, which can influence how they respond to conflict. For example, individuals with ADHD may experience Rejection-Sensitive Dysphoria—a heightened emotional reaction to perceived criticism or frustration that can lead to impulsive responses. Similarly, people on the autism spectrum may have emotional processing delays, requiring additional time to understand and articulate their feelings fully.

Source: Shutterstock

As mediators, we’re already accustomed to creating space for emotional processing in the room, but when working with neurodivergent individuals, this requires heightened awareness and sensitivity. Differences in emotional regulation can contribute to conflict escalation, as neurotypical parties may misinterpret neurodivergent responses as overly intense, dismissive, hostile, or disengaged. Mediators can address these dynamics by intentionally allowing extra time for responses, validating each person’s emotional experience, and guiding participants

in recognising and articulating their feelings. By creating a supportive environment where neurodivergent individuals can process emotions at their own pace, mediators can help reduce miscommunication and cultivate an atmosphere of trust and understanding.

5. Internalised Conflicts Can Complicate External Disputes

Many neurodivergent individuals experience internal conflicts, such as struggles with self-esteem, anxiety, and imposter syndrome. These internalised issues, often from years of feeling misunderstood or judged, can spill over into interpersonal conflicts. For example, someone with ADHD might have a deepseated fear of failure or a sense of inadequacy, making them more sensitive to criticism or negative feedback. These internal struggles can intensify reactions to external conflicts, causing neurodivergent individuals to respond defensively or withdraw.

Acknowledging internal and external conflicts is essential for mediators to understand the full picture of the dispute. Rather than viewing defensive behaviours as inherently combative, mediators can recognise them as potential indicators of deeper self-doubt or unresolved personal challenges. Encouraging neurodivergent participants to explore these internalised issues within the safe space of mediation can facilitate more productive, transformative conversations that address the surface conflict and its emotional roots.

Transformative Conflict Resolution through Neurodiversity Awareness

In conclusion, neurodiversity brings valuable depth and complexity to mediation, shaping how individuals perceive, process, and respond to conflict. Transformative conflict resolution relies on empathy, clear communication, and adaptability, enriched by understanding neurodivergent dynamics. As mediators, we have a unique opportunity to bridge divides by recognising how neurodiversity influences conflict. By appreciating different cognitive styles, accommodating sensory needs, supporting emotional regulation, and acknowledging internal challenges, we create a space where genuine understanding and conflict transformation are possible. This inclusive approach empowers all parties to engage fully, creating an environment where neurodivergent perspectives are valued and each individual feels seen, heard, and accepted.

Embracing the link between neurodiversity and conflict allows us to build a mediation process that resolves disputes and promotes empathy, understanding, and respect, making a lasting impact on all involved. In doing so, we move closer to a culture where diversity is accommodated and celebrated, enhancing the overall effectiveness and humanity of the mediation field.

Marie Coombes, CEO of We Restore Calm, is a conflict transformation specialist recognised for her pioneering work in neurodiversity and mental health. Recently shortlisted for the Civil Mediation Council’s Diversity & Inclusion award, Marie combines professional expertise with lived experience to create inclusive, empathetic, and transformative resolutions.

Benefits of Mediation:

Confidential...

‘Your discussions with mediator are not shared without your consent’

Voluntary...

Flexible....

Timing and agenda to suit your needs

All parties agree to participate to try

Low costs....

Fixed fee which is far cheaper than court.

Control

... You agree the outcome, solution and any agreement

Quick..

‘ Mediation can be completed within 14 days’

Impartial....

The mediator does not judge or take sides

Additional in Workplace:

Retention/ Recruitment

Mediation ensures disputing parties feel understood and heard. Ideal for emotionally charged disputes, mediation can calm the conflict driving the dispute whereas adversarial argument and positioning inflames and drives conflict and escalates disputes.

Mediation can help parties to agree a solution, draw a line and move forward or continue relationships between business partners, employees and employers and friends, neighbours and family. It can salvage and protect reputations.

Litigation is expensive and can take years and frequently the costs exceed the value of the dispute.

Less Stress...

Simpler process than litigation/court

Improves teamwork/ productivity/ profitability

Jean McDougall

e: jean.mcdougall@focuscivilmediation.co.uk

w: www.focus-mediation.co.uk

t: +44 (0)7706 705149

MEDIATION JOURNAL U K

MEDIATION PROVIDERS

CONSENSIO

t: +44 (0)20 7831 0254 e: alex.efthymiades@consensiopartners.co.uk w: www.consensiopartners.co.uk a: 30 Niton Street, London, SW6 6NJ Contact: Alex Efthymiades

Consensio is a leading workplace mediation provider, helping organisations to manage workplace conflict. Our services include: 1) mediation and conflict resolution training ranging from taster events to accredited training, 2) external mediation services for two-party and team disputes, 3) conflict coaching and 4) consultancy services to transform organisational responses to conflict.

FOCUS MEDIATION

t: +44 07706 705149 / +44 1908 804968 e: jean.mcdougall@focuscivilmediation.co.uk w: www.focus-mediation.co.uk Contact: Jean McDougall (Case Manager)

Focus has been providing mediation services for over 20 years. Focus has a panel of fully accredited and experienced Civil/Commercial, Workplace/Employment and Family mediators with a wide range of professional backgrounds who cover the whole of the UK, ensuring you can choose the right specialist mediator for your dispute. Our team have handled cases involving from 2 to 50+ people. We can tailor the right programme to meet your needs saving you management and personal, stress, time and costs.

GARDEN COURT MEDIATION

t: +44 (0)20 7993 7600 e: mediationclerks@gclaw.co.uk w: gardencourtmediation.co.uk a: 57-60 Lincoln’s Inn Fields, London WC2A 3LJ Contact: Lavinia Shaw-Brown

We offer a flexible, high-quality mediation service from the initial inquiry through to facilitating agreement. We have a team of experienced, professional mediators with the interpersonal skills to suit all civil, commercial, workplace and family disputes. Our aim is to help you find a resolution to the dispute quickly and effectively.

INMAN COX MEDIATION

t: +44 (0)798 537 3010 e: james@inmancox.com w: www.inmancox.com

Established for over 5 years, Inman Cox Mediation are specialist workplace resolution mediators. We provide expert advice, mediation and co-mediation services as well as on-going support and training. ICM provides organisations with the tools needed to resolve future disputes and help prevent them from arising in the first instance. Working with a select number of organisations we work with HR professionals to get disputes resolved quickly. Our experience has led us to develop a number of bespoke training packages to deal with team dysfunction. Contact: James on 07985373010 or james@inmancox.com for a free consultation. www.inmancox.com

INDEPENDENT MEDIATORS

t: +44 (0)20 7127 9223 e: imoffice@independentmediators.co.uk w: www.independentmediators.co.uk

Launched in 2007, Independent Mediators (IM) is a leading UK and international mediation chambers. IM were awarded Who’s Who Legal Mediation Firm of the Year 2019 in May 2019. We manage the practices of nine of Europe’s leading full-time civil and commercial mediators; Charles Dodson, Phillip Howell-Richardson, Kate Jackson, Michel Kallipetis QC, Jonathan Lloyd-Jones, Mark Lomas QC, Bill Marsh, Andrew Paton and Nicholas Pryor. All nine mediators feature in the top tiers of the leading legal directories. They have mediated in excess of 8,500 matters between them in their careers. The commercial disputes mediated range in value from tens of thousands to multi-billion pounds and include almost every sector of business and law with parties from all over the UK and internationally.

IPOS MEDIATION

t: +44 (0)333 014 4575 e: info@mediate.co.uk w: www.mediate.co.uk

a: The International Dispute Resolution Centre, 1 Paternoster Lane, London EC4M 7BQ

Contact: Joanne Claypole

Leading UK and International Mediation Chambers established in 1995. Handling civil, c ommercial, family, workplace and employment disputes. Our mediators have, between them, mediated thousands of disputes and many of our members are recognised as expert mediators by the legal directories. In addition, we offer a full case administration service; from helping the parties select a mediator to arranging the date, venue and paperwork necessary to make your mediation as smooth and as successful as possible.

JAMS INTERNATIONAL

t: +44 (0)20 7583 9808 e: mrushton@jamsadr.com w: www.jamsadr.com

JAMS is the world’s largest private provider of ADR services with a caseload of around 15,000 disputes a year. It’s London office provides arbitrators and mediators for cross-border and UK domestic disputes as well as administering international arbitrations in various sectors.

KARIMA FAHMY, FOUNDER & MEDIATOR, THE INDEPENDENT NEUTRAL

t: +44 7958 973 389 e: karima.fahmy@independentneutral.com w: www.independentneutral.com

Karima is a CEDR accredited and CMC registered Civil, Commercial and Workplace mediator. Having practised as a Corporate lawyer for over 20 years, Karima has extensive experience of helping parties resolve their differences and reach mutually satisfactory outcomes. Karima’s mediation practice is focussed on employment and workplace disputes; real estate and construction disputes; joint venture, shareholder and board disputes. Prior to sitting as a mediator, Karima was General Counsel of an international real estate investment and development business. Prior to that she spent 10 years at Hogan Lovells. Karima brings experience of navigating complex and sensitive commercial and stakeholder contexts.

KINGSWAY LAW

t: +44 (0) 7825 894 893 e: larry.george@kingswaylaw.uk w: linkedin.com/in/larry-george-b9114a46 w: P.O. Box 516, Cambridge CB1 0BD Contact: Larry George

Qualified Barrister; CEDR accredited mediator, 2010. Larry has 30+ years of experience as a commercial legal adviser advising on corporate and commercial matters. He has specialised in the oil business including oil trading but also has a great deal of experience in general commercial areas including in contracts, terms of trade and related disputes. Mediation experience includes franchising, engineering contracts and professional negligence. Larry has wide international experience and is a fluent Russian speaker.

t: +44 (0)7957 8 12345 e: mia@miaforbespirie.com w: www.miaforbespirie.com

Mia Forbes Pirie is a mediator, executive coach and trainer. She works with teams, boards and directors, family businesses and individuals in conflict. Mia helps people to work better together and communicate under pressure. In addition to commercial clients, she has worked with MPs, governments, religious organisations, NGOs, and charities. Mia provides training online and in person. She is writing a book and working with UCL to help people Disagree Well. For more information see: www.miaforbespirie.com and her YouTube Channel : @miaforbespirie5289

THE MAVERICK MEDIATOR - TM DEVELOPMENT ASSOCIATES LIMITED

t: +44 7905 868 058 e: tony@achievesuccess.org.uk w: www.maverickmediator.co.uk

Anthony Munday is an independent ACAS-accredited workplace mediator. He specialises in working with conflicted Senior Teams. His previous career as a detective and senior leader enables him to empathise with clients in senior management positions. He has developed a unique Conflict Resolution Method. Anthony works in partnership with HR Leaders to conduct a root-cause analysis of the impact of conflict in the organisation. The financial and human costs of conflict for the client are extrapolated. They use the client’s own data to create an inclusive and holistic Action Plan to mitigate future Risks and Costs.

PROMEDIATE (UK) LIMITED

t: +44 (0)20 3621 3908 w: www.promediate.co.uk

ProMediate provides mediation for the whole range of civil and employment disputes as well as being a CMC Registered Training Provider. We also resolve disputes between traders and consumers under the ADR Regulations. We have a panel of over 50 mediators available to mediate online by telephone or in person throughout the UK and in the EU.

ROGER LEVITT

t: +44 (0)7776 141 717 e: roger@rogerlevittmediation.co.uk w: www.rogerlevittmediation.co.uk

I undertake all types of commercial mediation including: Property, Construction, Partnership, Corporate, Professional Indemnity, Insurance Financial & Wills. Member of Civil Mediation Council Registration Committee. I’m approaching 100 mediations.

MIA FORBES PIRIE

STILLHR

t: +44 (0)7932 762 448 e: robert@stillhr.com w: www.stillhr.com Contact: Robert Still Qualified workplace and team mediators. Robert Still FCIPD, Leye Oladapo and Paula Symons. Over 10 years’ experience across the UK and Europe. CMC Registered Mediation Provider 2019. Resolving individuals and team conflict.

SHERIDAN WORLDWIDE

t: +44 (0)20 3753 5350 e: caroline.sheridan@sheridanworldwide.com w: www.sheridanworldwide.com

Contact: Caroline Sheridan

At Sheridan, we help organisations worldwide maximise their potential and drive lasting change by providing the guidance and inspiration necessary for their people to succeed. Our award-winning work focuses on tailored one-to-one, team and group coaching to support the development of leadership and management capabilities, as well as mediation and conflict resolution interventions across the business. Our specialists in organisational culture, wellbeing, inclusion and team dynamics partner with clients to ensure a tailored approach. We supply our coaching and mediation services in the UK and internationally through our extensive faculty based around around the world in all key locations.

THE TCM GROUP

t: +44 (0)20 7092 3186 e: david.liddle@thetcmgroup.com w: www.thetcmgroup.com

TCM are a leading provider of conflict management, mediation, HR and leadership training and consultancy. We deliver tangible benefits to our customers by transforming conflict and change from a threat into an opportunity. For more details, please Read Managing Conflict (Kogan Page/ CIPD) available from https://amzn.eu/d/4jRZ7mB written by TCM’s CEO David Liddle.

t: +44 (0)7305 062 578 e: askforhelp@werestorecalm.com w: www.werestorecalm.com

At We Restore Calm, we recognise the growing impact of mental health challenges and conflicts in the workplace. We specialise in comprehensive mental health training, including Mental Health First England certified courses. We also offer state-of-the-art conflict resolution solutions ranging from executive coaching, mediation, to team workshops and neutral evaluations. The goal? To empower organisations like yours to enhance employee engagement, reduce absenteeism, and, in turn, boost overall productivity. Think of us as the catalyst to not just elevate your workplace atmosphere but also positively impact your bottom line. Let’s foster a resilient, harmonious, and productive environment together.

WE RESTORE CALM