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The “kitty grotto,” so named because it’s been overrun by friendly stray cats.

RANDIAH CAMILLE GREEN

Welcome to The Convent, a wellness oasis and Airbnb in a former Detroit nunnery

By Randiah Camille Green

A FLAG OF the Black Madonna blows in the wind at the entrance of The Convent — a new health and wellness community in Detroit.

Rather than nuns, the former convent on the edge of Detroit and Hamtramck is now occupied by private massage therapists, estheticians, visual artists, and even a psilocybin journey facilitator.

The owners of Detroit’s formerly infamous bathhouse The Schvitz purchased the convent in July of 2022 and quickly renovated it into a healing oasis where practitioners serve private clients in rooms that were once nuns’ quarters. A former chapel on the first floor will be used as a gallery space for art openings, yoga classes, and other events.

The owner of The Schvitz and The Convent, Paddy Lynch, says it will give affordable studio space to wellness practitioners and artists.

“A lot of the people who’ve been working out of The Schvitz for a number of years now have done really well there, but a lot of them are either mobile or working out of their homes,” he says. “I felt like not a ton of people had combined art and wellness, and this would be a nice space to make up for that. Healers and wellness practitioners aren’t really seen as artists, but they kind of are. It’s like the healing arts.”

The Convent had its grand opening and open house on Saturday, Nov. 5 with an art exhibit, jazz music, and drinks, and a ribbon-cutting ceremony with Detroit Mayor Mike Duggan, though some tenants have already begun accepting clients.

The building was built in 1929 and occupied by the Sisters of the Holy Family of Nazareth. It later became a host to a number of other occupants including a detox facility, nursing home, and shelter for battered women.

“My wife and I were educated by Polish nuns growing up and I’m really fascinated how the City of Detroit built more religious institutional architecture than almost any other city,” Lynch says. “Much of it has gone into disrepair or isn’t being used. What do you do with these buildings? You certainly shouldn’t tear them down, and in some cases, they’re historically protected, so you’ve gotta find interesting and positive ways to use them.”

A grotto next door to The Convent is flanked by angels on either side and is dedicated to Our lady of Częstochowa, or the Black Madonna, who hangs above the community’s doorstep. Lynch doesn’t own the holy site, which he calls “the kitty grotto” because it’s been overrun by friendly stray cats, but it does reinforce the building’s storied history and add to its gothic lore.

Among the roughly 20 occupants at The Convent, there are six resident artists, two nonprofits, a lymphatic specialist, and a botox physician.

One of the nonprofits, Lynch & Sons Fund for the Arts (which is owned by Lynch’s family), will be awarding six-month artist residences with studio space inside The Convent.

“At the end of that six months, they can show their work in the chapel or do a reading if they’re a poet or writer,” Lynch says.

There’s also an Airbnb inside called Magdalene, which co-owner Margarita Valbuena calls a “decompression getaway.”

The Airbnb space features a simple bedroom and living room with a couch, mini fridge, and walls adorned with work from artists in the building. The room goes for $75 a night, and the idea is that visitors will book a session with one of the practitioners during their stay.

“We want to keep it pretty accessible and simple,” Valbuena says. “It’s not fancy, per se. We’re not a luxury respite. It’s more like, ‘Hey, you know the haunted convent? You wanna sleep here for a night?’”

Valbuena co-owns Magdalene with three other women including Lynch’s sister Caitlin Lynch, who collectively call themselves the “choir girls.” Magdalene has had a few guests so far, who Valbuena tells us have said they “felt healing energy in the space.”

“It’s like a little retreat in Detroit for people who just want a night away from whatever their grind is,” she says. “Like an ‘I do a lot in my life and I need space to rest’ kind of place.”

While showing us around, Lynch adds that several clairvoyants have said the building may be haunted or have “heavy energy.”

“I’m told by some of the parishioners that it changed hands multiple times and a few of the operators were pretty sketchy, like the place just didn’t have good energy,” Lynch says. “People were locked up in here. We’ve had clairvoyants come through here and there’s a couple of rooms where they’re just like, woah.”

A staycation in a potentially-haunted former convent with a psilocybin journey or massage on top sounds pretty damn good to us.

The Convent is located at 13301 Mound Rd., Detroit. More information is available on Instagram, @convent_detroit and @magdalenedetroit.

Michigan GOP denigrated Muslims before courting them over ban on books

MICHIGAN REPUBLICAN

candidates and a large group of Muslims have found themselves on the same side of an issue — banning books in Dearborn.

Over the past month, the unlikely bedfellows have protested Dearborn Public Schools’ refusal to remove LGBTQ+ affirming books from libraries.

Conservative Republicans and some Muslim advocates held a “Unite America” rally in Dearborn, a heavily Democratic city that conservatives have long neglected because of the heavy presence of Islam.

Some of the Republicans who gathered in Dearborn have a history of making Islamophobic remarks and surrounding themselves with antiMuslim zealots. But that didn’t stop the far-right reactionaries from trying to score political points among Muslims ahead of the Nov. 8 election.

Among those featured at the rally were secretary of state candidate Kristina Karamo, attorney general hopeful Matt DePerno, and Michigan GOP Co-Chair MeShawn Maddock.

Karamo, a conspiracy theorist with a reputation for indulging in Christian nationalism, has described Islam as oppressive and violent. In a 2018 podcast, Karamo and a guest spent more than 50 minutes criticizing the Muslim Brotherhood and Muhammad, the founder of Islam whom Karamo called a sexual predator.

“Some of the things Muhammad did teach was it’s OK to rape. It’s OK to have a sex slave,” Karamo said. “People think many folks are just saying these things. It’s really true. He did teach that this type of behavior is permissible.”

In a video in 2018, Karamo said Islam is fundamentally violent.

“Oftentimes the media paints this picture that Islam is a peaceful religion,” Karamo said in a 2018 video. “You can survey Islamic countries and say that is not the case. Name one Islamic country where a religious minority and women aren’t persecuted. I’ll wait.”

Maddock and her husband, state Rep. Matt Maddock, R-Milford, also have a history of making anti-Muslim comments and speaking out against Muslim refugees.

In 2017, Meshawn Maddock bragged that she helped “support and promote” an “anti-sharia” rally in Southfield, where demonstrators spread misinformation about radical Islam taking hold in the U.S. The event was hosted by ACT for America, which claims Islamic law is incompatible with Western democracy. The Southern Poverty Law Center described ACT for America as an anti-Muslim hate group.

After a terrorist attack in France in 2015, Matt Maddock spread fear about Muslims in the U.S.

“It’s inevitable the same terror and mayhem will happen here,” Maddock wrote on Facebook. “It’s just a matter of time. They are already here. Pay close attention to how this plays out and their tactics. Tell (Gov. Rick) Snyder we don’t need any more Muslim refugees.”

The Dearborn rally also featured Tamara D. Carlone, a fear-mongering conservative who is running for a seat on the Michigan State Board of Education. Carlone has repeatedly mocked the Islamic faith and called it anti-American.

In 2019, Carlone blasted training for public school teachers that was designed to dispel misinformation about Muslims.

“It is in the curriculum, the books, the teachers minds, and our kids will be lied to and told Christianity sucks and Islam rules,” Carlone wrote on Facebook.

“They are going after our innocent kids with young and developing minds on purpose,” Carlone added.

She shared demeaning memes of Muslims and falsely claimed that “We now Have a Muslim Government.”

“Our nation and our government has been infiltrated by people who want to destroy us,” the Facebook post reads. “It WILL only get worse. Plus John Kerry’s son in law is an Iranian muslim. Had enough?”

Despite her anti-Muslim views, The Detroit News endorsed Carlone.

All of the Republicans are also devout supporters of former President Donald Trump, who proposed banning Muslims from entering the country.

But none of that rhetoric was present at recent protests in Dearborn, where Republicans and the Muslims they have ridiculed came together to fight what both groups have falsely called attempts to indoctrinate children with LGBTQ+ ideology.

Protesters held signs like, “Keep your dirty books in the closet” and “Whatever happened to the good old days?”

“Dearborn is a diverse and vibrant community where Muslim families thrive and lead,” Sam Inglot, deputy director of the Progress Michigan Political Action Fund, tells Metro Times. “Now, as part of a nationwide trend, right-wing extremist bad actors and Michigan Republican candidates are spreading disinformation in order to further their political agendas, despite spreading lies and fear about Islam for years.”

He adds, “Republicans are using Dearborn’s Muslim community to score political points, when in reality, they have no respect for those who practice Islam. The way Michigan Republicans have been twisting the truth for weeks to pit parents and teachers against each other is bad enough, but they have a history of denigrating the Muslim community. This display of two-faced politicking reminds us all how Republicans have no shame when it comes to using a community as political pawns, regardless of the damage they might cause.”

Protesters rallied at DTW against former President Donald Trump’s 2017 travel ban.

STEVE NEAVLING

—Steve Neavling

Judge dismisses Karamo lawsuit seeking to reject tens of thousands of Detroit votes

A WAYNE COUNTY Circuit Court judge on Monday rejected a lawsuit by Republican Secretary of State candidate Kristina Karamo that sought to trash tens of thousands of absentee ballots cast by Detroit voters in Tuesday’s election.

Judge Timothy M. Kenny slammed Karamo and her attorney for failing to “produce any shred of evidence.”

“While it is easy to hurl accusations of violations of law and corruption, it is another matter to come forward and produce the evidence our Constitution and laws require,” Kenny wrote in the order dismissing the case. “Plaintiffs failed, in a full day evidentiary hearing, to produce any shred of evidence.”

Karamo, an election denier who has made a plethora of false claims about election fraud, urged the court to require Detroit voters to cast their ballots in person or show an ID to vote absentee. To verify absentee ballots, election officials rely on signature verification, not photo identification.

Tens of thousands of Detroit voters have already cast absentee ballots.

In her lawsuit, Karamo cited a widely denounced propaganda film, 2000 Mules, by conservative provocateur Dinesh D’Souza, that falsely claimed widespread fraud in the 2020 presidential election.

Kenny said there was no credible evidence in the lawsuit.

“These claims are unjustified, devoid of any evidentiary basis and cannot be allowed to stand,” Kenny said.

Although Karamo claimed that election fraud was statewide, her lawsuit targeted Detroit, a predominantly Black city that overwhelmingly votes for Democrats.

The judge’s ruling is just the latest embarrassing rebuke of Karamo’s baseless conspiratorial claims.

“Plaintiffs have raised a false flag of election law violations and corruption concerning Detroit’s procedures for the November 8th election,” Kenny wrote. “This Court’s ruling takes down that flag.”

—Steve Neavling