Riverfront Times, December 7, 2022

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Kevin Johnson was given the

penalty last week. But even as Missouri plans two more

has become a closely guarded secret

Cover illustration by TYLER GROSS

Publisher Chris Keating

Editor in Chief Rosalind Early

EDITORIAL

Managing Editor Jessica Rogen

Editor at Large Daniel Hill

Digital Content Editor Jaime Lees Food Editor Cheryl Baehr

Staff Writers Ryan Krull, Monica Obradovic, Benjamin Simon Theater Critic Tina Farmer

Copy Editor Evie Hemphill

Contributors Thomas K. Chimchards, Kathy Gilsinan Joseph Hess, Reuben Hemmer, Andy Paulissen, Mabel Suen, Graham Toker, David Von Nordheim, Theo Welling

Columnists Chris Andoe, Ray Hartmann, Dan Savage

Editorial Interns Kasey Noss, Sarah Lovett

ART & PRODUCTION

Art Director Evan Sult Creative Director Haimanti Germain Production Manager Sean Bieri Graphic Designer Aspen Smit

MULTIMEDIA ADVERTISING

Associate Publisher Colin Bell Account Manager Jennifer Samuel Directors of Business Development Tony Burton, Rachel Hoppman, Chelsea Nazaruk

BUSINESS Regional Operations Director Emily Fear

CIRCULATION

Circulation Manager Kevin G. Powers

EUCLID MEDIA GROUP

Chief Executive Officer Andrew Zelman Chief Operating Officers Chris Keating, Michael Wagner Executive Editor Sarah Fenske VP of Digital Services Stacy Volhein Audience Development Manager Jenna Jones VP of Marketing Cassandra Yardeni Executive Assistant Mackenzie Dean www.euclidmediagroup.com

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FRONT BURNER

FIVE QUESTIONS for Dancing Santa Reggie Van Derson

Previously On

LAST WEEK IN ST. LOUIS

Imagine you’re driving to work when you stop at a red light and see … Santas dancing at the intersection. That would be Reggie and the Dancing Santas, who have been entertaining St. Louisans for four years. We interviewed Reggie Van Derson, a local DJ, dancer, teacher and owner of Pure Entertainment Company. Visit pecparty. com/dancingsantas.html to learn more. This interview is edited and condensed for clarity.

How did the Dancing Santas start?

I teach a hip-hop workout class [Hip Hop Mamas], and it’s an allladies class. Every now and then we’d go out and dance at a club or do something fun as a group. Basically, it turned into a social group.

So one day, Cuppie, which is short for cupcake, said, “Hey, you know, my son in California, he had a couple of friends, and they all bought Santa suits.” And we were like, “That sounds fun. Why don’t we do it?”

So we were going to go out and walk around with Santa Claus outfits on. ut we happened to go to the Missouri otanical ar den] where there was music playing, and because it was a hip-hop workout class, we started dancing. We realized that really drew a lot of attention and made people feel good to see Santas dancing.

And you kept it going?

One day, I was sitting at home, and Cuppie, who actually works for my company, said it would be fun to go out and do this more. She also felt that the way people responded was just amazing. I said, “We need to do something.” Like spreading Christmas cheer is what we were realizing that we were doing. So we were like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if we actually did it like out in the street at the stoplight? You know, while people were waiting at a stoplight?”

Are you guys setting up cones and performing all of the time? Or are you just stepping out during red lights?

We all go out at one time [when] the yellow light hits. If there’s someone driving and they’re speeding and it’s a yellow light, we won’t go out. It has to be right. So if the cars are slowing down, and that light changes, yeah, we timed everything out to where we go out, we do our routine and we pick everything up. Because we take presents, we take props, all kinds of stuff [into the street], pick it up and walk it back out, even before the light turns green. So it is an organized monster.

So it’s 30 seconds? Or how long do you have?

Yes, it’s about 30 seconds, 30 to 45. So you already have songs ready to go on the boom box?

MONDAY, NOVEMBER 28 Vic Faust, fired from Fox 2 for being an unbelievable dick to a colleague has a new venture. Natu rally it’s a podcast, and it’s titled “Cancel This,” because nobody gets fired any more, they get martyred. And of course the podcast has ties to former House Speaker Steve Tilley because a sure sign you’ve been canceled is that a supremely well-connected lobbyist/former politi cian backs your new vanity project.

TUESDAY, NOVEMBER 29 St. Louis County mistakenly prepared bills for the Metropolitan Sewer District at a tax rate of $0.60 per $100 instead of $0.06 per $100. Aren’t entire departments paid to deal with this crap? And: RIP Kevin John son. The state of Missouri has now execut ed 93 men in the so-called modern era of capital punishment

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 30 The Prince of Wales and his wife Kate showed up in Boston and were greeted like conquering heroes, or at least tabloid celebs. We blame The Crown for making these rich Germans buzzy again. And, RIP Christine McVie, the brilliant musician who spurred Fleetwood Mac to some of its greatest hits.

THURSDAY, DECEMBER 1 The PostDispatch reports that Missouri Republi-

ESCAPE HATCH

cans want to make it harder for ordinary people to change the state constitution. Apparently they’ve realized they can’t beat recreational cannabis and union protections at the ballot box; time to change the rules. Also, a man died after being shot in the head on I-55 in deep south city — but police say, bizarrely, it might have been suicide, meaning he shot himself in the head while driving Further proof that Missouri drivers are remarkable multi-taskers, even in death.

FRIDAY, DECEMBER 2 The Dirt Nationals came to town, bringing stock cars and rowdy hoosiers to the Dome. Terrifying.

SATURDAY, DECEMBER 3 Tough day: two teens were found shot to death in separate incidents, and several puppies died in a house fire. Totally unrelated: Michael Butler fended off an insurrection to be reelected chairman of the Missouri Democratic Party.

SUNDAY, DECEMBER 4 The state has a $6 billion surplus. Naturally, we have zero intentions to do anything transformative with the money here in Misery Set aside quality education for a moment (because Lord knows that’s not on the table), and just imagine how many public swimming pools you could build and staff with $6 billion!

We ask three St. Louisans what they’re reading, watching or listening to. In the hot seat this week: three small-business owners.

Amanda Helman and Susan Logsdon, owners of Golden Gems Watching: Bad Sisters on Apple TV “ e are obsessed It might be because it’s about five badass sisters that are looking out for each other, and that’s pretty much our life. Well, the looking-out-for-each-other part — not the drama, murder and insur ance-investigation part obviously. It’s just a really good watch, though.”

Jenelle Lovings, owner of Jenelle Lovings Design Studio Listening to: Renaissance by Beyoncé

“I know it is maybe cliché to say because who isn’t, but it’s true. I’ve listened to it nonstop since it dropped in uly. iven the state of the world, I am obsessed with self-care, so anything that makes me feel empowered or brings sheer joy, I am all about.”

—Benjamin Simon

es, music is ueued up. It’s ready O It’s li e Saturday Night Live –– it’s all live. But it’s funny because when you get an extra second or two –– like I started moonwalking at the end as I go off because I realized I still have four seconds [left at the light]. I call those shenanigans because people are not expecting it, and they love it, you know?

Carly Meyer, owner of Flowers and Weeds Listening to: Who? Weekly, a podcast about D-list celebrities “It breaks down pop culture and keeps us laughing while we arrange hundreds and hundreds of wedding flowers.”

e Santas dance to bring cheer to St. Louis. | COURTESY PHOTO

Hole Watch

Seen: December 10, 8:45 a.m.

Size: About two feet wide and unfathomably deep, to where we couldn’t see the bottom

Location: Chouteau and Mississippi, near where an open manhole in the bike lane was also recently spotted Fear factor: Whole stretch of street is rapidly rising to a 9 (out of 10) for those brave enough to ride a bike Efficacy of warning sign: Considering the hole had expanded and partially consumed it when we checked later, 2 (out of 10)

SO ST. LOUIS e Do-Gooder

An anonymous story about some thing that could only happen in the Gateway City

What if I told you that there’s one elected leader in town who has on multiple occa sions stopped a constitu ent hellbent on getting fa tally hit by a car?

Years ago, this was the scene: the elected driving his truck late at night at a slow speed down one of his ward’s main thoroughfares. Behind him was a man with a long gray beard, shu ing slowly against traffic, amid a brea with reality, a bad drunk or effort to kill himself.

But the elected, himself driving against traffic, blared his horn and flashed his lights to alert cars who might otherwise mow down the poor soul.

“Come on!” the elected yelled, craning his neck backward out his window. “Let’s all just get home

tonight.”

Minutes ago, I’d nearly struck the man moseying down the middle of the street. I’d doubled back to see if I could help, but the elected had swooped in making me superfluous.

he distressed man shu ed sev eral more blocks as the elected kept honking, directing oncoming cars to one side of his truck or the other.

The elected eventually con vinced the man it was getting cold and going to be a long walk home, so he might as well accept a ride. The bearded man hoisted himself up into the passenger seat. The elected asked me if I wanted a ride back to my car.

“No thanks,” I said. Words were going to pass back between the two men, and I didn’t want to get in the way.

Send your So St. Louis story to jrogen@ euclidmediagroup.com.

CHRIS ANDOE’S SOCIETY PAGE

Barbara Clark and Geoff Story Showcase Historic Elsah

Our November 16 feature, “The Bricks that Bind,” opens in 2002 with Geoff Story buying the LaSalle Park home that rehabber and former magazine publisher Barbara Clark had left a decade earlier, and the neighbors sharing the folklore of her legendary parties all those years later. Barbara had been the vacated district’s solitary resident in 1976, and the tale of her and Story’s eventual and unlikely friendship was originally pitched as the first of my new column, but was fleshed out as a cover story instead. To celebrate, Clark and Story hosted a soiree at Clark’s circa 1883 Elsah, Illinois, home, overlooking the Mississippi.

A few hours before the party, Story texted me a photo of the industrious Clark under a table, presumably completing a task as part of her party preparations. “What is she doing under there?” I asked. “She’s just being Barbara,” Story replied.

Situated between bluffs along the Great River Road near Grafton, picturesque Elsah has been described as “the New England of the Midwest.” Guests, including many media types and Soulard restoration pioneers, arrived just after sunset to a roaring bonfire behind the white picket fence.

I was giving a tour of the second story to Panera V.P. Dessi Zaneva and “Maven of Mardi Gras” Luann Denten, when the Maven — someone who has wowed me with her psychic abilities in the past — stopped midway through the house and said there was a divider of some sort. “Was this originally a duplex?” she asked. “There’s something here. This hall didn’t always go through,” she said. I felt certain the home had never been a duplex, but shrugged it off and continued the tour.

Sally Horbelt opened the nearby Village of Elsah Museum just for party guests, which made for many charming strolls through the historic district. High along the rear wall was an old mural of the entire town, and in it, Clark’s house was half its present size. Right where the Maven paused on the tour would have been the original mansard roof.

St. Louis Magazine Senior Editor

Nicholas Phillips, who had written an Out in STL feature on Geoff Story in 2017, was in attendance, as was Sarah Fenske, executive editor at Euclid Media Group. Fenske greeted Clark and recalled how in the RFT cover story, neighbors were still talking about Clark a decade after she had left.

“I moved to Compton Heights recently, and every house in the neighborhood is known by a family name, and it’s often not the family who currently lives in them, or even the family before that,” she said with a laugh.

LaSalle Park community organizers Deb Aerne, her niece Meg Holmes, and her nephew-in-law Brent Holmes had all been mentioned in the article, and were in attendance. They brought along 10-year-old neighborhood organizer Mason, who was photographed in the paper, as well as his brother. The boys seemed perfectly at home, mingling with guests and posing with the issue. “Being the only kids in attendance didn’t bother them one bit,” Aerne said.

RFT Editor in Chief Rosalind Early was a bit delayed by work commitments, but joined in conversation with Elsah residents Pat and Christy Stavely, who relocated to the village from Nashville, Tennessee. I later roped Early and others into a nightcap at my favorite area haunt, Alton’s Bubby & Sissy’s, where handsome bartender David Rauschkolb kept us entertained.

Debriefing after the party, Clark remarked how delighted the Elsah guests were by the turnout and the great energy. “Just as the residents of LaSalle Park talked about you long after you were gone, so will the residents of Elsah,” I said.

Those who made the scenic 45-minute trek from the city expressed being taken by the magic of the evening. Fenske, for instance, lamented having to depart early to emcee an event. “I felt like I could have talked to the people there all night. So many smart, interesting St. Louisans on the edge of the river in what felt like 1,000 miles from the city.”

HARTMANN

County Leadership Without Honor

e Page administration exposes its ugly side by reneging on its pension settlement with Tim Fitch

Written by RAY HARTMANN

County Executive Sam Page provided a preview last week into what four full years of his control of St. Louis Coun ty government will look like. It isn’t pretty.

The county appealed a judge’s order to enforce a settlement that Fitch had apparently reached af ter courts sided with his pension claim. At issue was whether Fitch should have lost his $85,000 an nual pension benefits as a conse quence of having been elected to serve on the county council at an annual salary of $20,000.

The county seemed to agree that Fitch should not lose his pension, but then backtracked in August and is now dragging out the court battle.

But the story that matters here has nothing to do with the com plex world of pension benefits. And it’s not about Fitch, who did not seek reelection and is leaving county government at year’s end after 35 years of service — includ ing four as a councilman and five as police chief.

No, the story is about honor be cause — unlike Fitch — the county administration of Sam Page isn’t going anywhere. And the lack of character and good faith dem onstrated by Page’s minions in Fitch’s case should alarm county residents and anyone who inter acts with county government.

Fitch and his attorney aren’t willing to discuss the case since it’s pending. Page and his noncommunication team don’t an swer questions from me on public issues, so I chose not to waste their

time or mine inquiring about a matter before the courts.

But we don’t need any of the parties to weigh in. The details are clearly laid out in Judge Jef frey P. Medler’s “findings of facts” in language that is both clear and stunning.

To my layperson eyes, the smok ing gun can be found in para graph 35 of the judge’s findings in an email sent by attorney Dan Em erson, acting county counselor (so designated when he was contract ed by the county to represent it).

Here’s Emerson’s August 8 email to Fitch’s attorney, Kim Mathis:

“I apologize, but there was a last-minute change in my march ing orders and I’ll be filing a No tice of Appeal before tomorrow’s deadline. I still see a potential path to settlement with your cli ent, but there is a bigger concern about the ripple effects of the Judgment and its potential effect on the benefits of individuals who accrued time as Councilmembers. Filing the NOA will give us an other 30-day window in which the trial court will maintain control of the Judgment until the record on appeal is filed.

“My understanding is that Councilmember [Republican Er nie] Trakas will be proposing leg islation to address those issues by amending certain pension ordi nances, and that if the amended ordinance passes[,] the County’s concerns about the larger issue likely may become academic. I see that is on the 8/9 Council Agenda.

“Again, I’m sorry for this late change of events when we ap peared so close to the finish line. I’ll see you at the 8/16 hearing.”

This one’s pretty easy to unpack. That’s an email — an apology email, no less — in which Page’s county counselor has openly ad mitted to Fitch’s counsel of “a change in my marching orders” as to carrying out a settlement agreement that had indeed been settled.

But wait, someone might say, isn’t Beth Orwick the real county counselor who was appointed by Page in 2019? Orwick recused her self because of a conflict presented by her office representing Page.

Well, it seems Judge Medler has an answer for that as well.

“On every pleading filed with this court, County Counselor Em erson has stepped into the shoes

of Beth Orwick and included his title on the signature blocks. All authority Beth Orwick possesses with respect to settlement agree ments generally, County Coun selor Emerson possesses with respect to the settlement in the instant case.

“County Counselor Dan Em erson has authority because he stands in the shoes of Defendants/ Respondents and is also an attor ney. He is presumed to have au thority from the County to settle the matter, which is exactly what he did.”

So if that’s the case — and who am I to argue with the judge? — who might be giving “marching orders” to Emerson? I’ve got it down to two suspects: Sam Page and the Tooth Fairy.

Do you believe in the Tooth Fairy?

Emerson filed a new Notice of Appeal on November 22 that states that the issues expected to be raised on appeal are claims that the judge erred in “granting the permanent writ of mandamus” and in “enforcing the purported settlement agreement among the parties.”

I’ll bow out of that argument, and not just because I don’t know a writ of mandamus from third base. What’s interesting here has nothing to do with pension law or the quality of Medler’s judging. It’s that pesky integrity thing.

Here’s more from Medler on that:

“Unrefuted evidence was pre sented that on July 18, Emerson contact[ed] Mathis via telephone and informed her that the County was interested in settling the case by paying Chief Fitch his unpaid pension and making an offer to pay some or most of his attorneys’ fees and costs in order to put the

case behind them.”

And there was this:

“By at least August 4, 2022, the parties had reached a settlement agreement that included an agree ment that Chief Fitch would be paid his pension benefits, Defen dants/Respondents would not ap peal the case, and an agreement as to attorneys’ fees and costs.”

That was four days before Em erson’s “change of marching or ders” email to Mathis.

The judge also referenced de tails of other communications be tween the parties that had ham mered out attorneys’ fees and the like. And he added this:

“There was a clear meeting of the minds here. The terms of the agreement are without question. The parties fully agreed on all material (and even non-material) matters involving settlement.”

There’s more where that came from, but county residents have no reason or interest to explore nuances of pension or settlement law. One needn’t have a law de gree to understand the basics of this dispute.

On its face, it has always seemed absurd that Fitch or anyone else should sacrifice pension benefits earned as a county employee as a penalty for getting elected to the county council. That’s a commonsense position, not a legal one. And the only reason this is even an issue is that Republican Fitch and Democrats, including Page, are fierce political enemies.

There is some irony in the Dem ocrats stealing a page here (so to speak) from the national Repub lican playbook that misrepre sents Social Security benefits as an “entitlement” — rather than what they are, which is something that was earned. County pension benefits are earned, and expect ing to receive them is not an act of wrongdoing.

But reneging on a deal is a form of wrongdoing. And there’s no question that it happened here.

That signals a problem that ap parently will outlast Tim Fitch in county government for at least four years. n

Ray Hartmann founded the Riverfront Times in 1977. Contact him at rhartmann1952@ gmail.com or catch him at 7 p.m. on Thurs days on Nine PBS and St. Louis in the Know with Ray Hartmann from 9-11 p.m. Monday thru Friday on KTRS (550 AM).

So who’s giving “marching orders” to Emerson? I’ve got it down to two suspects: Sam Page and the Tooth Fairy.

Allies Support Lewis Reed

Some prominent (and controversial) St. Louisans have spoken out in support of Lewis Reed

Written by RYAN KRULL

Dozens of letters have been submitted to U.S. District Judge Stephen Clark encour aging leniency in sentenc ing the disgraced politician Lewis Reed, who pleaded guilty to federal bribery charges in August. Those putting pen to paper to sup port the former president of the St. Louis Board of Aldermen include a former interim police chief, Reed’s former political staffers, small-busi ness owners and a who’s who of no table individuals with business at City Hall over the past decade.

Though Reed served as the pres ident of the Board of Aldermen for 15 years, only one former al derperson contributed a letter. No current ones did.

Lawrence O’Toole, who served as interim chief of the St. Louis Metropolitan Police Department during the notorious “kettling” in cident that saw protesters round ed up from the city streets, wrote that he has spent his career “in support of the rule of law.” He said he worked with Reed exten sively and “was shocked by the revelations of his wrongdoing; it simply did not conform to the in dividual I knew.”

Jeff Rainford, who served as chief of staff for Francis Slay and later went on to be a lobbyist, wrote that in his dealings with Reed, “Lewis always acted ethi cally” and was mindful about not mixing policy with fundraising.

Rainford was one of the key individuals working behind the scenes to privatize St. Louis Lam bert International Airport, a plan Reed supported and which Rain ford cites in his letter as an exam ple of Reed’s efforts to “improve the lives of his constituents.”

Many of the letters refer to Reed’s accepting of bribes from businessman Mohammed Almut tan, in which photos revealed him taking cash with seemingly prac ticed ease, as an aberration in an otherwise honest political career.

John “Johnny” Daus, who for years ran Johnny’s restaurant in Soulard, stressed that Reed re sponded to Daus’ concerns more readily than Daus’ own alderman. “He NEVER asked me for anything in return,” Daus wrote.

“Mr. Reed is not a thief,” wrote Michael Powers, who worked as Reed’s legislative director for three years. “He’s not someone who funded his time in politics on pay-to-play transactions.”

Tom Shepard, Reed’s former chief of staff, wrote that Reed’s “sole purpose for choosing public service was to improve our city.”

David Sweeney, former chief le gal counsel for the Board of Alder men and an attorney at Lewis Rice who now works to help develop ers with tax increment financing deals at City Hall, wrote, “In all my interactions with Lewis both pro fessionally and personally, I never questioned his moral compass. The current circumstances do not lead me to believe that this is in any way reflective of his long distinguished service to the citizens of St. Louis.”

Gary Bess, a former parks director in both the city and county, has been the subject of numerous Tony Messenger col umns detailing “questionable

financial dealings” involving a city halfway house and large sal aries paid out to Bess’ wife and brother-in-law.

On behalf of Reed, Bess wrote, “ hen ewis too office, he made sure his staff at city hall main tained an ‘open door’ policy, so that anyone with problems, com plaints, or questions (regardless of the nature) were welcome to come and share their concerns.”

The lone former alderperson to write in support of Reed was Kathy Hanrahan, who represent ed the city’s 23rd Ward.

“I never once questioned his

sincerity or integrity,” she wrote.

Though many of the letters re fer to the crime to which Reed has pleaded guilty as being out of character, few offer any explana tion as to the aberration.

A letter from former 26th Ward Committeewoman Patricia Moss is an exception. “What is his weak ness?” she wrote to Judge Clark. “Lewis is too trusting. He wants to help everyone. He treats people the way he wants to be treated.”

Reed, along with former Alder men Jeffrey Boyd and John Col lins-Muhammad, were sentenced on Tuesday. n

A Cause of Death, But No Closure

rotid artery, according to Roger Hayse, the coroner for Jefferson County, Illinois.

Reed was being held in the Tri-County Justice and Detention Center in Ullin, Illinois, when she suddenly took ill and was pronounced dead several days later at Mt. Vernon Hospital on July 18.

Reed was being held after her arrest in early February in connection with a mass overdose event at Parkview and Park Place apartments in St. Louis’ Central West End neighborhood.

Written by MIKE FITZGERALD

Chuny Ann Reed, 47, the sole person ever charged in connection with the deadliest mass overdose event in St. Louis history, died from a tumor obstruct ing the flow of blood through her right ca

Eleven people overdosed — eight fatally — after ingesting crack cocaine that Reed allegedly had sold them. The cocaine was tainted with fentanyl, a synthetic opioid 100 times more powerful than morphine. The mass overdose event was the subject of a Riverfront Times cover story.

“She had a lack of oxygen to the brain due to the obstruction in the carotid artery,” Hayse said Monday morning, citing

Lewis Reed accepts bribery cash. | VIA U.S. ATTORNEY’S OFFICE

Despite discovering a cause of death for the woman linked to St. Louis’ deadliest mass overdose in history, the investigation isn’t over

A Sunshine Law Clapback

ous transparency lawsuits against state officials.

In their filing, lawyers with the city counselor’s office called Gross’ suit a “transpar ent publicity stunt — an op portunity for self promotion in service of Gross’ political ambitions.” They accuse him of weaponizing the Sunshine Law and abusing the court system.

Written by RYAN KRULL

In September, attorney Elad Gross sued the City of St. Louis, alleging wide-ranging violations of the state’s Sunshine Law. Last week, the city slapped back at ross — filing a counterclaim that seeks $25,000 in damages.

Gross calls the counterclaim “pretty unnerving.”

“The City of St. Louis is now will ing to sue its citizens who dare to ask that the government follow our basic public transparency laws,” he tells the RFT. “It’s pretty wild.”

Gross’ initial lawsuit stemmed from what he said was a yearlong delay in accessing records rele vant to a potential lawsuit he was researching on behalf of a man injured while in the City Justice Center. A St. Louis-based lawyer focused on government transpar ency, Gross ran for state attorney general in the 2020 Democratic primary. Prior to suing the city, Gross was involved in numer

The city’s counterclaim includes numerous jabs at what it calls Gross’ “self-pro motion, at all costs,” calling him “a self-styled ‘Sunshine Law Defender,’ ‘Missouri Lawman,’ and ‘government transparency attorney’ ... Along with other remnants of Gross’ unsuccessful 2020 statewide political campaign, Gross maintains a website to trumpet his various policy views and to promote himself and his political aspirations … [the] web site doubles as an advertisement for Gross’ legal services.”

Gross says it’s “scary to think about” the city using his history of being involved in politics as a way to discredit his lawsuit. He says the city is sending a message that “citizens shouldn’t ask us for re cords. iti ens shouldn’t file law suits against their government.”

“Other folks have done some sim ilar things,” he says. “ hen I first had a lawsuit involving records with the Greitens administration, Eric Greitens’ attorney called me

names. Josh Hawley, Eric Schmitt, Mike Parson, all these folks have done similar things. I guess I really wasn’t expecting the city to be like them and be so resistant to trans parency.”

One section of the city’s counter claim, titled “Gross’ Media Cam paign,” highlights Gross’ courting of media coverage for his lawsuit. The counterclaim cites Gross giv ing reporters advance notice about his impending lawsuit as evidence that it was a “publicity stunt.”

Attorneys for the city cite media coverage from numerous local out lets, including the Riverfront Times he city’s filing ma es special men tion that the RFT story “featured a photograph of Gross smiling in

a ity par .” he filing doesn’t mention the image is a file photo the paper first published in 2019.)

Gross says, “I was speak ing to reporters before fil ing the lawsuit because they were complaining of the same thing I was en countering, which until then, I didn’t realize was widespread.”

The very end of the city’s counterclaim states they are seeking “compensato ry and punitive damages” from Gross of $25,000.

Gross says it may not have been proper for the city to claim $25,000 in damages, saying, “They couldn’t even follow the law in filing their lawsuit. They included a punitive damages request in their initial filing, which is not allowed under Missouri law without special per mission from the judge.”

A statute on the Missouri books regarding civil procedure states, “No initial pleading in a civil ac tion shall contain a claim for a pu nitive damage award.”

Gross says, “I’m not even sure that this lawsuit itself, the way it’s written, is a legitimate one right now, but obviously, that has to go to the court to be determined.”

The RFT reached out to the city counselor’s office for information on whether the statute applies to its counterclaim but did not re ceive a response. n

the autopsy report he submitted to the Illinois State Police, which is conducting a probe to determine criminal wrongdoing.

At the time of her death, Reed was awaiting trial in St. Louis on a federal charge of distributing fentanyl and crack cocaine resulting in bodily injury at the Parkview Apartments, 4451 Forest Park Avenue. If convicted, she would have faced at least 20 years in prison.

The Illinois State Police criminal investigation unit began looking into Reed’s death a few days after she died. An ISP spokesperson did not return phone calls or an email requesting comment on the autopsy results and whether they will affect the investigation.

Carolyn Reed, Chuny Ann’s mother, told an RFT reporter that she still plans to file a wrongful death lawsuit against the U.S. Marshals Service on the grounds that her daughter was under its supervision and was denied timely medical care.

“My concern is you violated my daughter’s right to see a doctor,” the elder Reed said. “That’s my concern. You violated her civil rights.”

Carolyn Reed also faulted the deten tion-center staff, which prevented her daughter from going to the hospital for nearly 24 hours after she had taken ill in the jail.

“She had a medical problem; she was ignored on the day of her death,” she said.

Chuny Ann Reed showed no symptoms of any illness in the months before her death, and news about the tumor blocking the carotid artery came as a surprise, her mother said.

She said she believes more questions need to be answered about the circumstances of her daughter’s death — and that a lawyer will help her find them.

“Now it’s time for me to put my shoes on and do some legwork,” she said. n

Lawyer Elad Gross sued the city for Sunshine Law violations, and now the city is countersuing

Elad Gross faces a $25,000 law suit. | COURTESY PHOTO

Carolyn Reed holds a pictures of her deceased daughter. | THEO WELLING

Megan Green Takes the Stage

Green is making St. Louis history as the first woman Board of Aldermen president

Written by MONICA OBRADOVIC

For the first time in St. Louis history, the members of the city’s most powerful governing body are all women.

This was not lost to speakers at Alderwoman Megan Green’s inauguration as president of the St. Louis Board of Aldermen last week.

Green’s election to replace the board’s former president, Lewis Reed, and interim successor Joe Vollmer clinches a new frame of power for top leadership in St. Louis. Comptroller Darlene Green, Mayor Tishaura Jones and Green, for the first time in city history, comprise an allwomen Board of Estimate and Apportionment, which controls city spending.

“No dollar will be spent by the City of St. Louis without the approval of three powerful women leaders,” Jones said at Green’s inauguration. Green herself referred to the Board of Estimate and Apportionment as the “shE-and-A.”

A progressive Democrat originally from upstate New York, Green won her election last month by a significant margin over her opponent, Alderman Jack Coatar. She ran on a campaign promise to make St. Louis “a place that works for everyone” by reining in tax breaks for developers, transforming public safety and fighting for reproductive rights.

“I commit myself to you, to your family, to your neighborhood and to your dream of what this city and your life in it can be,” Green said.

Green’s term will last only until April,

when Reed’s term was supposed to end. He resigned this year shortly after a federal indictment revealed his part in a bribery scheme to secure a local developer tax breaks.

In the next five months, Green will have no shortage of work ahead of her.

She’ll have to prepare aldermen for reorganization as the board shrinks from 28 members to 14. Problems with the city’s dwindling workforce and suffering city services must be resolved, Green said, by providing compensation and benefits such as childcare and studentloan assistance. The board must also appropriate American Rescue Plan Act funds and determine how to best use the hundreds of millions of dollars from the Rams settlement, she added.

That’s far from all. Green vowed to bolster public health and reproductive health care; pursue public safety strategies to address the root causes of crime; further decriminalize marijuana by changing hiring policies and zoning regulations; and possibly confirm new city members to the Board of Freeholders, a cooperative body that hopes to explore joint city-county governance.

Apart from her progressive ideas, which caused some of Green’s fellow Democrats to side with her opponent, Green promised an end to the “toxic culture” that has plagued the Board of Aldermen the past few years, a not-sosubtle jab at Reed.

The former board president famously laughed after the late shock jock Bob Romanik called Green a “skanky bitch” on air in 2016. Months before, Green had alleged corruption played a part in a committee vote to advance financing for a new NFL stadium.

All of the work ahead will be a lot, Green admitted. City residents will have lots of change to consider.

“I’m confident that by working together we can overcome institutional inertia and historic suspicions and get it done,” Green said. “Let me rephrase that sentence for emphasis: Only by working together can we get things done.” n

Megan Green speaks at her inaguration as Board of Alderman president. | MONICA OBRADOVIC

MISSOURILAND

Santa Without the Reindeer

St. Nick made a spectacular entrance at the National Museum of Transportation

Words and photos by REUBEN HEMMER

With Rudolph and the rest at the North Pole (no doubt resting up for the big day), Santa has been left to his own devices to get around. For the National Muse um of Transportation (3015 Bar rett Station Road; Kirkwood; tn mot.org), this meant helicoptering in ol’ Kris Kringle to the delight of kids and kids at heart.

On November 26, despite foggy morning conditions, Santa flew into the museum by helicopter to greet hundreds of aviation enthu siasts and St. Nicholas support ers. After a smooth landing, Santa posed for photos and listened to gift requests while many other holiday activities took place at the museum. Currently, the museum hosts Missouri’s largest operating model-train display. n

A CELEBRATION OF THE UNIQUE AND FASCINATING ASPECTS OF

ILLUSTRATION BY TYLER GROSS

No Mercy

Last week, another local man was added to the list of state executions. This week, we share an overview of Kevin Johnson’s failed effort to es cape the ultimate penalty, as well as an in-depth look at how states like Missouri have adapted to

(and, last week, overcome) previous woes ob taining drugs for lethal execution. We also look forward. On Tuesday, January 3, the state plans to execute its 94th person since the U.S. Supreme Court reinstated the death penalty in 1976. Ad

The Execution

BY MONICA OBRADOVIC

AMissouri inmate who fought his death sentence up until the final hour of his life was executed November 29 by the Missouri Department of Corrections.

Kevin Johnson, 37, died by le thal injection at the Eastern Re ception, Diagnostic and Correc tional Center in Bonne Terre. He had been sentenced to death for the 2005 murder of Kirkwood Po lice Sergeant William McEntee as a teenager.

ohnson declined to give a final statement through the Depart ment of Corrections and declined to have a final meal. e died at 7:40 p.m. — 11 minutes after the lethal injection was administered.

“Tonight, the state of Missouri killed Kevin Johnson, an amazing

father to his daughter Khorry, and a completely rehabilitated man,” Johnson’s attorney Shawn Nolan said in a statement. “Make no mis take about it, Missouri capitally prosecuted, sentenced to death and killed Kevin because he is Black.”

Johnson and his attorneys have been thwarted in every attempt to lessen his sentence from death to life in prison since a St. Louis ounty jury first convicted him of first degree murder in . On November 27, the Missouri Supreme Court ruled not to delay Johnson’s execution over a spe cial prosecutor’s claims that racial bias infected Johnson’s conviction and judgment.

Johnson’s lawyers swiftly ap pealed to the U.S. Supreme Court

vocates say Amber McLaughlin would be the first woman to be executed during that time. These stories were commissioned and fund ed by the River City Journalism Fund. Learn more about our work at rcjf.org.

Johnson’s execution.

“We hope that this will bring some closure to Sgt. McEntee’s loved ones who continue to an guish without him,” Parson said.

McEntee was the father of three young children. His widow spoke to reporters for the first time after the execution.

“It took 17 years of grieving and pushing forward to get to this point today,” Mary McEntee said. “This is something I hope no other family has to go through because you truly never forget or get over it.”

McEntee sounded collected and stern as she defended her late husband, who she said did not have a jury to decide whether he should live or die.

the next morning in one final at tempt to delay Johnson’s execu tion. he court filed its denial of Johnson’s request around 6:30 p.m. Tuesday night, 30 minutes after the 24-hour period for John son’s execution began.

Governor Mike Parson had pre viously announced he would not grant Johnson clemency. Parson issued a brief statement after

ohnson’s was the first execu tion in Missouri since Carman Deck in July. It’s a rare case of Missouri executing someone for a crime they committed as a teen ager. Missouri has executed only one man for a crime he commit ted as a teen since a landmark U.S. Supreme Court decision in 2012 required states to rethink how

For the past month, in a series called “Shadow of Death,” the Riverfront Times and its partners have been examining the ongoing toll of St. Louis County’s use of the death penalty, which hit its sentencing peak during the 28-year tenure of former Prosecuting Attorney Bob McCulloch.

— Sarah Fenske

Missouri killed Kevin Johnson for a brutal act he committed as a 19-year-old

Kevin Johnson, 1985-2022. | JEREMY WEIS

KEVIN JOHNSON

they treat youthful offenders.

Johnson’s age played a major role in the push for his clemency — as did his race. Johnson, a Black man, is far from a statistical anom aly in St. Louis County’s track re cord of capital punishment.

Former St. Louis County Pros ecuting Attorney Bob McCulloch won death penalty convictions against 23 men during his 28 years in office. ifteen were lac . Cases with white victims during McCulloch’s tenure were 3.5 times as likely to lead to a death sen tence as those with Black victims, according to a recent analysis by an expert hired by Johnson’s at torneys.

The special prosecutor who in vestigated Johnson’s case claimed McCulloch had schemed to ex clude jurors of color from the jury in Johnson’s second trial. Prosecu tor E.E. Keenan’s claims are now unlikely to ever be heard in court.

Jim Salter of the Associated Press — one of two reporters ap proved by the Missouri Depart ment of Corrections to witness the execution — said McCulloch was present for Johnson’s death.

“It’s been long delayed, but jus tice has been served,” McCulloch told Salter.

McCulloch recently told the RFT’s Ryan Krull that he had per sonally witnessed two other ex ecutions — one whose case he personally handled as a line pros ecutor and the other, the 2015 execution of Richard Strong, the most recent handled by his office before Johnson.

The brutality of Johnson’s crime shook the St. Louis area in 2005.

At the time, Johnson was on pro bation for a misdemeanor assault charge and worried that two Kirk wood police officers lingering in front of his great-grandmother’s house would tow his car.

Johnson’s brother, Joseph “Bam Bam” Long, who was born ad dicted to crack and lived with a congenital heart defect, suffered a sei ure as the officers were as ing about Johnson. Long was pro nounced dead soon after.

McEntee responded to the scene around the time an ambulance arrived for Long. Though John son would later acknowledge McEntee had nothing to do with his brother’s death, he believed that day that McEntee had some how been responsible. McEntee barred his mother from tending to the boy, Johnson would later testify in court.

After a “chance encounter” with McEntee two hours later, Johnson walked up to McEntee’s patrol car and shot him in the head and up per torso. e delivered the final shot moments later, after McEntee attempted to speed away but hit a tree. All told, McEntee suffered about seven gunshot wounds and was unrecognizable to people who knew him at the scene.

A prison spokeswoman estimat ed that 125 people crowded out side Missouri’s prison in Bonne Terre on the night of Johnson’s death in support of Johnson (along

with, she noted, one person who favored his execution). Among the pro-Johnson crowd was Reverend Darryl Gray, Johnson’s spiritual advisor who baptized him earlier in the month.

Gray said he was disappointed the government failed to under stand that “all human life is sa cred.”

“They’re killing someone who is different than they were 19 years ago, who made a mistake at 19 years old and spiritually, mentally and emotionally [has] been in a period of restoration and redemp tion,” Gray said.

Johnson’s daughter, Khorry Ra mey, was seen outside of the pris on with a large group of Johnson’s supporters.

amey, 1 , had filed a lawsuit to allow her to witness her father’s execution. Missouri law bars any one younger than 21 from wit nessing an execution, and a fed eral judge on Friday denied her request.

Michelle Smith, co-director of Missourians for Alternatives to the Death Penalty, said that Ra mey would not give any state ment or interview on her father’s execution.

At least two of Johnson’s former teachers traveled to Bonne Terre for Johnson’s execution. His ele mentary school principal and men tor, Pamela Stanfield, served as one of Johnson’s four selected witness

es, present in the room when he was given his lethal injection.

Melissa Fuoss, who taught John son English in high school, stood outside the prison.

Fuoss always remembered John son as the student who wrote a poem about giving his baby daugh ter a bath. They formed a friend ship after Johnson’s crime and wrote to each other frequently.

“I’m grieving [Johnson] as some one who’s become a friend to me,” Fuoss said. “But what is breaking my heart the most is [that] the absolute injustice, the failure of our judicial system to protect and serve Kevin, is only going to add pain on top of pain.”

If there is any silver lining for Johnson, Fuoss said, it’s the last ing impact he made on the people who knew him.

“He gave Khorry really strong roots, like roots of love and strength,” Fuoss said. “He fostered her dreams and that can’t be un done.” n

BY KATHY GILSINAN

When Missouri execution ers injected Kevin Johnson with a lethal dose of pen tobarbital on November 29, few people were there to see it. One of only two reporters permitted to observe, Jim Salter of the Associated Press, described a quick and quiet end. Johnson closed his eyes while the drug took effect, and his spiritual advis er murmured Bible verses, includ ing Psalm 23: “Yea though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil.”

“Within seconds,” Salter wrote, “all movement ceased.”

That was it, after all the appeals and protests, and nearly two de cades after Johnson, then 19, shot and illed ir wood police officer

William McEntee. Johnson’s own life ended with a few grams of a sedative more often used to eu thanize dogs.

his specific drug is one that Missouri has gone to great and secretive lengths to procure in recent years, as major pharma ceutical companies have objected to the use of their drugs to kill people — or stopped making such drugs altogether. The state has ar gued that the secrecy is to protect from protest or harassment those involved in the execution process. But there’s another good reason: What’s become public through investigative reporting and court proceedings is just embarrassing, including a dyslexic doctor ad mitting to sometimes confusing

Kevin’s daughter Khorry Ramey, 19, was barred from witnessing her father’s execution. | SARAH LOVETT

Kevin Johnson, a Black man, is far from a statistical anomaly in St. Louis County’s track record of capital punishment.

the names of drugs while over seeing more than 50 executions, and state-administered cash drug deals at a loosely regulated com pounding pharmacy over state lines. As executions have declined across the country over the past decade or so, Missouri’s is ulti mately a story of a state adapting to overcome severe pressure, both political and logistical, to ditch the practice altogether.

And it shows that if a state is de termined to ill a man, it will find a way.

In the United States prior to 2009, practically all of America’s then-30-plus death-penalty states conducted lethal injections rough ly the same way. The procedure involved a so-called cocktail of three different drugs: sodium thiopental to anesthetize the prisoner, pancuronium bromide to paralyze him, and potassium chloride to kill him.

That began changing more than a decade ago, with a combination of American business decisions and European regulations. In 2011, America’s only manufacturer of the anesthetic sodium thiopen tal announced it would no longer make the drug, which was also used in medical procedures, be cause the company couldn’t guar antee its product wouldn’t wind up in a death chamber. (According to manufacturer Hospira’s statement at the time, this decision was partly philosophical and partly practical, to avoid liability in Italy, a deathpenalty-opposing country where the company also operated.) The drug did have other manufactur ers in Europe, but the European Union had stated a commitment to abolishing the death penalty worldwide, and was tightening up export controls on drugs that could be used in lethal injections. In the space of about a year, the U.S. lost much of its ability to either make or import what had been a key ingre dient in executions.

By then, though, states includ ing Missouri were already looking for alternative ways to kill deathrow inmates. If American compa nies and European governments hoped to stop or at least compli cate executions in the U.S., they also helped generate a wave of state-level experimentation with other lethal drugs. Missouri briefly stopped executing people between 2011 and 2013 while it hunted for alternatives. At one point, the state chose a single drug, the anesthetic propofol — the one involved in Michael Jackson’s death. But that one was made by a German com pany whose American distributor demanded its supply back upon

learning the drug had mistakenly ended up in an execution pipeline. In October 2013, the Missouri De partment of Corrections found yet another solution: pentobarbital. The state resumed executions a month later, and executed nearly one inmate a month through 2014. (Then-Chief Justice Mary Russell of the Missouri Supreme Court said at the time that the state was work ing through a backlog.)

Meanwhile, dramatically botched executions involving various new drug cocktails proliferated else where. In Ohio, Dennis McGuire snorted and choked for 25 minutes before he died. In Oklahoma, wit nesses saw Clayton Lockett writhe in apparent pain for 15 minutes be fore they were instructed to leave the room, where he died nearly half an hour later. In Arizona, Jo seph Woods gasped for nearly two hours before his death. Each in cident involved a sedative called midazolam, which had apparently left each inmate conscious through a slow death.

“This is a process that’s only got ten worse,” says Deborah Denno, a law professor at Fordham Uni versity who has studied execu tion methods for 30 years. When

Denno first started wor ing on the issue, she says, people worried that scrutiny and criticism of exe cution methods would force states to find ways to ma e it easier, or at least more efficient, to execute people. (Botches were not uncommon under the old three-drug regimen.) “But now we’re execut ing even less and we have more eyes on the process than we ever had, but we’ve never had so many failed executions.” As in, full-on failed, in the sense that the pris oner actually survived the execu tion attempt. Out of four such in stances documented by the Death Penalty Information Center, three have occurred since 2011, two in Alabama in 2022 alone. As a re sult, Alabama suspended all of its executions the week before Mis souri executed Kevin Johnson.

Pentobarbital, too, has been as sociated with outcomes that ad vocates for death-row inmates have argued amount to uncon stitutional “cruel and unusual punishment.” Missouri is one of five states that uses pentobarbital alone to execute prisoners. Autop sies of individuals killed this way have revealed the presence of frothy fluid in the lungs in more

than half of the cases studied.

“They’re pretty much drowning in their own organs collapsing,” says Elyse Max, the co-director of Missourians for Alternatives to the Death Penalty. “There’s no evidence that any of it’s humane.”

The Department of Justice has once again paused federal execu tions, after they briefly resumed during the Trump administration, while it investigates the “risk of pain and suffering” associated with pentobarbital.

In this context, Missouri works hard to keep the source of its exe cution drugs a secret. The handful of companies the FDA approves to sell pentobarbital all have policies that forbid selling it to state correc tional departments for executions.

Missouri for a time used a com pounding pharmacy in Oklahoma to get the drugs, but was forced to switch suppliers after local report ers, including Chris McDaniel, then of St. Louis Public Radio, revealed the pharmacy’s name.

Thereafter, Missouri got a court order to prevent having to dis close other suppliers. Neverthe less, in 2018, McDaniel, then at BuzzFeed News, uncovered the name of the new supplier, a St. Louis-area compounding phar macy. He tweeted that it took him “Two failed open records lawsuits … Three years of digging … Get ting the cops called on me … [and] A state assistant attorney general calling BuzzFeed’s lawyers to complain about me.” But by the time his story was published, the supplier at issue had been bought by a subsidiary of Centene, which assured McDaniel that since being acquired the pharmacy “has nev er supplied, and will never supply any pharmaceutical product to any state for the purpose of effec tuating executions.”

Centene did not respond to multiple requests for comment. Karen Pojmann, the communi cations director for the Missouri Department of Corrections, wrote in an email: “Missouri’s execution protocol, which is based in state statute, prohibits disclosing the identities of the execution team and the drug supplier. (In fact, I don’t have access to the informa tion you’re requesting.)”

Next month, Missouri plans to execute another person from St. Louis County: Amber McLaugh lin, who was convicted in 2006 of first degree murder. gain the state will frame the killing as be ing done on behalf of its citizens. It just won’t tell them where the drugs come from, or who’s prof iting from their sale, before all movement ceases. n

Former St. Louis County Prosecuting Attorney Bob McCulloch has now seen 11 men he prosecuted put to death. He personally witnessed three executions, including Kevin Johnson’s. | RYAN KRULL

“They’re pretty much drowning in their own organs collapsing. There’s no evidence that any of it’s humane.”

— Elyse Max, co-director of Missourians for Alternatives to the Death Penalty

The Next Person to Die

On November 20, 2003, 45-year-old Beverly Guen ther was abducted outside the office where she wor ed in Earth City, Missouri. She was stabbed and raped, her life less body left in the Patch neigh borhood in south St. Louis, near the ban s of the Mississippi iver.

About a month prior, a 30-yearold then nown as Scott Mc augh lin had been charged with bur glarizing Guenther’s Moscow Mills home. The two had been a couple until that summer, but Guenther had told others in re cent months that she’d come to fear Mc aughlin. She had ta en out a restraining order.

Soon after Guenther’s neigh bors reported her missing, police interrogated McLaughlin, who led them to Guenther’s body.

After a four-day-long trial in 2006, the jury found McLaugh lin guilty of first degree murder, and the judge ruled McLaughlin’s crime warranted death. McLaugh lin is now scheduled to die on Tuesday, January 3 — the second in a trio of St. Louis County defen dants receiving execution dates this winter. Kevin Johnson was illed November , and eonard Taylor is scheduled for Tuesday, February 7.

All three were prosecuted by former St. Louis County Pros ecuting Attorney Bob McCulloch, who saw 23 people sentenced to death during his long tenure. oters ousted him in the wa e of Michael Brown’s death in Fergu son, but that doesn’t change the fate of the people he prosecuted. Barring a last-minute reprieve, McLaughlin will be McCulloch’s 12th execution.

But McLaughlin’s story is dif ferent from any of the four other St. Louis County people on death row, and the 11 already executed.

When McLaughlin arrived in Potosi Correctional Center, Jes sica ic lin had already been there for over a decade. t first, ic lin says she only new McLaughlin from a distance as

BY RYAN KRULL

someone “very full of anxiety, scattered.”

hen, in 18, ic lin won a landmar transgender rights case against the Missouri Department of Corrections, allowing her and other transgender inmates access to hormone therapy.

“As a result of that [case], I be came a sort of mom to a lot of girls who were coming out and trying to figure out how to have coming out conversations and how to get access to hormone therapy,” says ic lin, who was released from prison earlier this year after serv ing 26 years.

One day another inmate intro duced ic lin to mber Mc augh lin.

ic lin says she remembers thin ing to herself, “Now, this ma es sense. I’ve nown you for a long time, you didn’t necessar ily seem very comfortable in your s in, and now you’re smiling.”

“I didn’t really come to now Amber until, well, Amber became mber,” ic lin says.

In a brief phone interview with the RFT, McLaughlin says that when she was around 12 years old she started wearing women’s cloth ing, though she had to do so away from her parents and guardians.

“I new then this is what I want ed to be,” she says. “But I had to always do it secretly.”

McLaughlin describes her up bringing as “not always good. My adoptive parents were mean and strict.”

Court records indicate McLaugh lin was in foster care for a time and that her adoptive father, a police officer, paddled her with what the family called a “board of education.” He also used his night stic and taser on her.

When McLaughlin moved out on her own, she ept her desire to dress li e a woman secret. ith her own place, she says, she “could be that way as much as I wanted to.”

Legal experts say it’s uncertain how, or even if, McLaughlin’s gen der will have any effect on the late-stage appeals her attorneys

are now bringing. If McLaughlin is executed in January, she would be the first woman put to death by Missouri since the U.S. Supreme Court reinstated the death penalty in 1 6.

ic lin, who wor ed for a para legal for decades while incarcer ated, says that whether McLaugh lin’s gender affects her remaining appeals depends on the judge.

“I cannot fairly say that I now it’s in a judge’s head,” she says. “I can just say I’ve seen some really horrible opinions where judges have gone out of their way to ma e sure that somebody’s being trans is made relevant to an oth erwise irrelevant issue.”

hat li ely is relevant, says McLaughlin’s attorney Larry Komp, is that McLaughlin is “bor derline” intellectually disabled. At her 2006 trial, a psychologist testi fied that Mc aughlin had an I of 8 . ic lin calls her friend “a very simple person,” adding, “I don’t mean that in a derogatory way.”

Over the phone, McLaughlin conducts her side of the conversa tion in short, soft spo en replies.

About the death penalty, she says, “It’s cruel and unusual pun ishment. Nobody deserves to be executed li e this.”

About the murder of Beverly Guenther, she says, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for it to happen.”

She adds, “I thin if I’d been my true self, I probably would not have been there.”

hen as ed what it’s li e to now the date she is scheduled to die, McLaughlin says, “It’s stress ful, it’s ...” She trails off into a long silence.

During the sentencing phase of McLaughlin’s 2006 trial, a psychia trist named Keith Caruso was sup

posed to present mental-health evi dence regarding McLaughlin’s state of mind at the time of murder.

However, in what attorneys now term the “Dr. aruso fiasco,” the psychiatrist told defense at torneys that during cross-exami nation in a previous trial, allega tions that he’d falsified research data had come to light.

Believing they would have to disclose this, the defense opted not to call Caruso as a witness. Komp says it was a devastating decision. There was no expert tes timony regarding McLaughlin’s mental health — which the jury had been told would be integral to the case for life in prison instead of death.

“They made that promise to the jury,” Komp says. “That was the majority of their opening state ment at the penalty phase. And then they bro e that promise.”

Furthermore, Komp says the academic dishonesty in Caruso’s past didn’t have to be disclosed in the first place.

“The reason for not calling him was based on ignorance, a mis understanding of Missouri law,” Komp says.

he jury deadloc ed on the question of death, leaving the de cision to Judge Steven Goldman, who ruled that McLaughlin de served to die.

ast wee , omp says he read with great interest the Missouri Supreme Court’s denial of a stay of execution for Kevin Johnson, who was executed two days later. Surprisingly, Komp found a lot in that ruling to be optimistic about in McLaughlin’s appeal.

The court’s ruling placed em phasis on the fact that it was the jury, not the prosecutor, who handed down the death penalty. “In the end it was the jury — not the prosecutor — that found John son guilty of murder in the first degree; it was the jury that found the three statutory aggravators; it was the jury that weighed the ag gravating and mitigating factors; and it was the jury that found death to be the appropriate sen tence,” the court wrote.

“If you’re gonna rely on a jury,” Komp says, “then I don’t have a jury sentence. I have a judge that came in when the jury couldn’t do it. That’s a huge distinction.” n

Monica Obradovic provided addi tional reporting for this story.

For more on the River City Journal ism Fund, which provided funding for this project and seeks to sup port local journalism in St. Louis, please see rcjf.org.

Amber McLaughlin was found guilty of murdering an ex-girlfriend. | COURTESY OF JESSICA HICKLIN

CALENDAR

BY RIVERFRONT TIMES STAFF

THURSDAY 12/08

Big-Wig Bard

A living legend of the written word is headed to the Lou. For mer United States Poet Laureate Billy Collins will be at the JCC of St. Louis’ Staenberg Family Com plex (2 Millstone Campus Drive, 314-432-5700) sharing poetry from his new collection, Musical Tables. Collins is the rare poet who has reached the highest eche lons of the craft while at the same time creating work that is acces sible and fun without wading into schmaltz. He’s also a great live act. The event starts at 7 p.m. Tickets are $32 and come with a copy of the book (or $38 for two tickets and a book).

FRIDAY 12/09

Shop and Snack

City Foundry (3700 Forest Park Avenue), home of local delicious eats and shopping, is now offering even more local goodness with a Night Market from 6 to 11 p.m. The market will include more than 40 local vendors with all the things you need for the gift-giving season, including jewelry, art, vin tage and handmade clothes, and home goods. The event is free, but you can get a VIP swag bag for $25. A live DJ and drinks from 4 Hands will keep the party vibes going.

SATURDAY 12/10

Plant Life

ouse plants are definitely extra in right now, and who doesn’t like a plant that is hard to kill, hence the succulents and cacti. Collect ing a wide range of specimens is easier than normal right now since the Flyleaf Succulent and Tropical Plants pop-up (4205 Watson Road, 314-410-0589) is back this month with a special hol iday event. In addition to its usual array of succulents and tropical plants, this month will feature a selection of pre-potted and readyto-gift plants, soil amendments

and pre-mixed blends, pots, plant hangers, gift cards and more. The event will take place from 9 a.m. to 2 p.m., and admission is free.

So Many Santas

You know those people who dress up like Santa Claus who go on pub crawls and just generally take over a whole corner of town with their white beards and their jolly spirits? That could be you! Get red-suited up for Santarchy ’22 (that’s “Santa” plus “anarchy”). This themed pub crawl offers not only merry adventures but also food options and drink specials. But it’s not just about drinking until you’d pass out in a manger with Blitzen, it’s about spreading the holiday spirit. Participants are encouraged to bring their own Santa bags full of treats and gifts to hand out to all of the good little boys and girls and nonbinary peo ple that they come across on the streets. Check Facebook for route details.

Down Dog

Can you say that you really know your lover before you’ve squirmed your way into a double downward dog pose? Calm your dirty mind. It’s not what you think — not ex actly. In the yoga pose, one person positions themself into that stan dard, butt-to-the-air stretch. The

other then places their feet upon the top of their partner’s derri ere and forms a similar triangle. The bottom gets a nice lower-back stretch, and the top works out those arm muscles. It’s intimate, since you wouldn’t trust just any one (or want their feet) in such a pose. But who would even think to try this out? Very few, with the exception being the attendees of Urban Breath’s Lovers Yoga

The partner yoga and Thai mas sage class from instructor Stacy Broussard is beginner friendly but unique in a world full of yoga classes. It’s a great date night that promises to help attendees con nect, strengthen their bond and enhance communication. The workshop runs from 4 to 6 p.m. and costs $60 per couple. Book tickets at urbanbreathyoga.com.

SUNDAY 12/11

On Pointe

There’s a beloved St. Louis holi day tradition of going to COCA (6880 Washington Avenue, 314-

725-6555, cocastl.org) to see The Little Dancer and the story of Mary, who awakens one morn ing in a Paris museum, the Musée d’Orsay, with her replica of the Edgar Degas sculpture “The Little Dancer Aged Fourteen” — who has come to life. The story returns this year reimagined as The Lit tle Dancer: Moments in Time, a full-length ballet conceptual ized by COCA’s young artists and performed by members of Ballet Eclectica, a student dance compa ny. The expanded version tells not only the tale of Mary but also that of multiple dancers whose stories are drawn from the students. The show is open Thursday, December 8, through Sunday, December 11. Showtimes vary by date, and tick ets run $25 to $30.

Rudolph on Stage

The claymation magic of the ani mated TV movie Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer gets a rein terpretation as a live stage pro duction at the Fox (527 North Grand Boulevard, 314-534-1111). The live show captures the spirit

COCA expanded Little Dancer into a full-length production. | COURTESY PHOTO

Poet Billy Collins will read from his new book during ursday’s event. | COURTESY PHOTO

WEEK OF DECEMBER 8-14

and aesthetics of the original movie, the longest running in history, with cute costumes and a childlike set. Rudolph is an os tracized reindeer who has to em brace what makes him different to find his way in the world. he musical includes all the popular characters from the original such as Santa and Mrs. Claus, Hermey the Elf, Bumble the Abominable Snow Monster, Yukon Cornelius and Clarice. The show is one day only at 1 p.m. and 5 p.m. Tickets are $25 to $80.

Goal!

Need to scratch that World Cup soccer itch but can’t afford a plane ticket to Qatar? Get your fix locally at the St. harles am ily Arena (2002 Arena Parkway, 636-896-4200, familyarena.com) and watch the Lou’s very own Ambush take on the Baltimore Blast. Indoor soccer is faster paced and higher scoring than what they’re playing in the World

Cup. Crucially, there is an allow ance for overtime and a shootout so that no game will ever end in an oh-so-unsatisfying tie. Sun day’s game kicks off at 4:05 p.m., and tickets start as low as $20.

MONDAY 12/12

Knit-A-Thon

At the Craft Alliance, it will be knit ting time, for eight hours straight during the Knit-Along. From 10 a.m. to 6 p.m. at Craft Alliance (5080 Delmar Blvd., 314-725-1177, craftalliance.org), everyone is in vited to knit. Longtime knitters and beginners are both welcome. So are those who want to knit a full hat, or complete a partially finished scarf, along with those who want to make a blanket. The creations are donated to the Cov enant House, which provides pro gramming and shelter for teens without a home. Tickets are free. Through Friday, December 16, the

Craft Alliance will also be collect ing craft items to donate to the Covenant House.

TUESDAY 12/13

Still Life

A woman sits cross-legged clutch ing her son in an embrace in one image. A safety pin pierces the s in across two fingers in another. A boy stands with a pa per crown that reads “king” and stares out at the viewer in yet another. These images — and many more — were made by An gela Shaffer as part of her Good Mother series, in which she ex amines her evolving relationship with her son. St. Louisans can catch the tender-yet-powerful series as part of her exhibition at the Sheldon (3648 Washington Boulevard, 314-533-9900, theshel don.org). It is free to attend dur ing open hours, which run Tues day through Friday from noon to

5 p.m. and Saturday from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m.

WEDNESDAY 12/14

Funny Talk

You don’t have to be a fan of the genial morning-show banter that fills M radio, or for that mat ter Seinfeld, to know that talking about nothing much can be pretty darn funny. That’s the premise lo cal comedian Mollie Amburgey brings to The Casually Mollie Pod cast, and it’s also in evidence in her new in-person comedy show case, This Is Casually Happen ing. Each podcast episode features a different guest and a “casual topic” that Amburgey uses to help us get to know them better. The showcase has taken up residence in the suitably chill upstairs event space at the Golden Hoosier in south city (3707 South Kingshigh way Boulevard, 314-354-8044, the goldenhoosier.com). Stop by for the sixth and final showcase of 2022, which features Amburgey on stage as well as local comedi ans Max Pryce and Larry Greene. Ellie Kirchhoefer plays host. Show starts at 7:30 p.m. Tickets are $15 on Eventbrite. n

Have an event you’d like consid ered for our calendar? Email cal endar@riverfronttimes.com.

e Flyleaf Succulent and Tropical Plants pop-up will have a wide range of succulents on o er. | VIA STEFANO / FLICKR

Angela Sha er’s Good Mother is open at the Sheldon. | ANGELA SHAFFER

Smash Hit

Press’ smash pizza is the best not-pizza pie on both sides of the Mississippi

Written by CHERYL BAEHR Press

2509 South Jefferson Avenue, 314-3281094. Thurs.-Fri. 4-9 p.m.; Sat.-Mon. 11 a.m.9 p.m. (Closed Tuesday and Wednesday.)

Press does not serve pizza. This is the one thing Logan Ely wants you to know be fore venturing into his Fox Park restaurant for one of his stuffed, panini-pressed con coctions. Granted, he and his team call Press’ currency “smash pizza,” but that’s less a reference to its kinship with the form and more of a naming issue. They could have called it a smashed calzone. Closer yet, an Italian que sadilla. One could even make the case that it’s a sandwich. For Ely and company, the smash-pizza moniker just stuck, so they decid ed to run with it.

It’s a fitting naming process for an idea itself, which came out of nowhere. An unrelenting cre ative, Ely has always placed ex perimentation at the center of everything he’s done in his culi nary career, beginning with his tenures at acclaimed restaurants across the globe, continuing at his now-shuttered tasting-menu restaurant Shift, and living on in his current hotspot, Lucky Ac complice. At the latter, Ely and his team were playing around in the kitchen one day and started messing with a pizza idea. They joked about smashing the pies, so Ely went home that night, bought a panini press online and told the group they were going to try it. He wasn’t completely convinced it was going to work, but he could not shake the feeling that there was something there.

Around the same time, a longvacant storefront just a few doors down from Lucky Accomplice finally came on the mar et. Ely and his business partner, Bri an Schuman, had been tossing around the idea of taking on a new project; considering this was just

a stone’s throw away from Lucky Accomplice, they felt they should jump on the opportunity, not only to expand their operation but to help breathe additional life into the block. The smash-pizza idea was already in their back pocket, so they decided to go all in on the concept, figuring they’d wor out

how to scale their project by the time they’d finished the build out. It turns out, they’d have plenty of time to do so. When Ely and Schuman took over the space, it was a disaster filled with gar bage and uneven floors, there was little more to the room than a ramp that led to the back alley.

Undeterred, the team cleared out the space and embarked upon an arduous renovation with a shock ing result, considering the state of affairs when they inherited the place. Once a garbage dumb of a former garage, the room is now a sleek, modern restaurant with gray concrete floors, white paint ed-brick walls, clear glass-globe light fixtures, and an shaped bar covered in white penny tile and topped with charcoal-colored stone.

Ely admits the smash-pizza de velopment process was nearly as difficult as the renovation. Though it seems like a simple concept — toppings are stuffed into dough, baked, pressed, then covered with more toppings — it turns out smashing a pizza is more involved than it seems. Originally, he and Press’ chef, Donn Hinkle, thought they could simply roll out one piece of dough, stuff it, and fold it over onto itself like a calzone. It was an utter disaster, resulting in toppings and cheese oo ing out on the press and filling the dining room with the smell of grease smoke. Even the itera

A selection of Press dishes that includes caesar, BBQ kimchi and duck pizza, pepperoni pizza, cold beets and more. | MABEL SUEN

Donn Hinkle and Logan Ely sample their wares. | MABEL SUEN

tion they thought they’d perfected enough to serve at their friendsand-family soft opening was so far below their standards they de cided to scrap it and come up with an entirely new way of cooking the smash pizzas for night two.

Now, two months in, Ely, Schuman and Hinkle are still tin kering with their smash pizzas, though they feel pretty good about where they’ve gotten them to. Their potato version makes you see why. Like all Press’ smash piz zas, the potato is round, roughly 10 inches in diameter and about two inches thick. Potatoes, beer cheese and fontina are placed onto a sin gle layer of dough, covered with another and then smashed into a panini-esque press that melds the ingredients together. The concoc tion is then taken off the press and covered in bitter frisée, which has been tossed in a mouth-puckering mustard vinaigrette that brightens the entire dish.

Press’ most visually stunning dish is the BBQ Kimchi and Duck, which pairs duc confit and mol ten scamor a cheese for the fill ing, then covers the concoction in technicolor pickled red on ions, kimchi cabbage and kewpie mayo. The zing from the onions and kimchi were a lovely counter to the rich duc filling, though the highlight was the undertone of sesame oil in every bite.

Like the duck and scamorza on the prior pie, Ely and Hinkle combine shredded pork shoul der with Oaxacan cheese for the al pastor. Hunks of pineapple top the pressed pie, adding a sweet juicy note alongside the verdant cilantro lime crema. There’s a

touch of lip-tingling heat coming from somewhere on the al pastor, but it’s nothing compared to the slapshot to the palate that is the pepperoni. Here, spicy pepperoni and mozzarella cheese are the filling, while shoc ingly pi uant pickled peppers and pepperoni oil underscore the heat.

Press offers a handful of items outside of its smash pizzas, includ ing a delightful bonito and brassica caesar. Here, the beautiful bitter vegetable is made even more acer bic after it’s charred on the grill. onito fla es and white anchovies

add a delightful umami sea flavor, all of which is countered by razorsharp pickled lemons. It’s a master class in flavor layering.

Ely and company are especially proud of Press’ bar program, run by Corey Moszer, which features a list of 12 draft cocktails (two of which are N/A) that are each car bonated to individual specifica tions. Highlights include a refresh ing rum-based Hemingway and a coconut-fat-washed piña colada. The former is an outstanding way to wash down what may be Press’ best offering: its garlic cheese

bread. Here, focaccia-like bread pulls apart to reveal whole cloves of garlic that have been roasted to the point of being soft and sweet. The bread is coated in a light layer of molten cheese, giving it the feel of a savory bread pudding. You might even refer to it as a cheesy, garlicky monkey bread.

No matter what you call it, it’s delicious. n

Press’ o erings include the potato pizza, chicken bacon ranch pizza and caesar. | MABEL SUEN

e mushroom pizza has sottocenere, quark, kale, sage, niçoise olives and membrillo. | MABEL SUEN

Press’ menu includes a good selection of dra cocktails. | MABEL SUEN

Ice of Life

Good Ice is helping St. Louis bartenders create the perfect cocktail

Written by CHERYL BAEHR

Jordan Goodman will never forget the moment he fell in love with cutting ice. He was working at Narwhal’s Crafted — his first bartending gig — and was asked one day to hand cut about cubes for the wee ’s service. It was a small operation, nothing more than an Igloo cool er, a rectangle of ice and a lowtech chiseling device. However, the moment he cut into the frozen bloc , he was hoo ed.

“There was something so sat isfying about the process — the nice crack you get when you cut into it, then the look of it when you see it in a cocktail,” Goodman says. “You ask for a Sazerac, and you get this beautiful ice cube in it. The presentation and care each step of the way is appreciated by the guest. People could feel the at tention going into it and felt like we were taking care of them ev ery step of the way.”

Now, Goodman is making it his life’s wor to bring that elevated

beverage experience to St. ouis cocktail enthusiasts with Good Ice, the artisan ice company he found ed in . sing a multi step pro cess that results in perfectly clear, geometric custom ice, Goodman and his business partner, yle il lespie, are nailing down an often overlooked, yet essential, compo nent of the beverage experience.

If you’ve had a drin at a y i ger, Olive Oa , the uc y ccom plice or O+O Pizza, chances are good that you have experienced Goodman and Gillespie’s handi wor . Since early , oodman has been steadily developing a following among local bartenders and restaurateurs who’ve been eager to explore ways to elevate their establishment’s drin expe rience. Goodman sensed ice could have this power when he first began cutting at Narwhal’s his hunch was confirmed while bar tending at the Clover and the Bee when he developed a regular fol lowing who watched him at work.

“It became a spectacle,” oodman says. “People were coming in for happy hour to watch it, and it de veloped this cult following around ebster roves . People started asking for it at Olive + Oak, so I started doing it for them as well. It piqued my interest that there is de mand for this and that people love it. hat was the light bulb moment when I wondered what would hap pen if I pursued it.”

oodman began researching custom ice companies and, find ing only a couple around the coun try, set out to forge his own path

SHORT ORDERS

in the nascent industry. He asked respected industry professionals, such as his Olive + Oak colleagues Charlie Martin and Morgaine Se gura, as well as Tim Wiggins of Re treat astropub, ellowbelly and a y iger. ll were in agreement If he launched an ice business, they would use his product. oodman and his mom, Deb bie, put some money together and launched Good Ice in January , pic ing up new customers by word of mouth as he honed his craft. When the world shut down in March of that year, Goodman took the time to perfect his skills and grow his business slowly. y that summer, he’d gotten enough experience under his belt that he was ready when things blew up following an Instagram post from uc y ccomplice that depicted one of his cubes. he ice in ues tion, a watermelon cube, went St. ouis viral on social media, and Goodman was inundated with business. s he’s observed, all it takes is for someone to see the product, and they are sold.

“ here has been so much atten tion to the visual of glassware and garnishes because we live in a vi sual world,” Goodman says. “Bar tenders will think, ‘I’ve done all this wor why not put most beau tiful ice in my cocktail?’ This ice is a technical tool for a bartender, and it’s also visually a stunning product that gets people to order more and feel like they are getting a better product overall.”

Goodman underscores that Good Ice is not simply a visually stunning

product. s bartenders loo to cre ate the best version of a drin they can possibly ma e, ice becomes an essential building bloc . cube or sphere made by oodman or il lespie begins with filtered water, which is then passed into a ma chine that uses a process called directional freezing. This removes any remaining impurities and air bubbles, resulting in a perfectly pure ice crystal that has no taste and melts slower, which means a guest can enjoy their cocktails as intended for a longer time.

“ e’ve tin ered with just about everything there is to tinker with as bar professionals,” oodman says. “The more control you have, the more you can make sure you are giving someone an excellent product. It allows you to create a comprehensive experience. o be able to give that or receive that as a customer is truly amazing.”

oodman has been thrilled with the reception of Good Ice and sees the sky as the limit. Though the company started out with just shapes, a brand new machine and application — one used by only five places in the entire world — is al lowing him and illespie to experi ment with logos, custom designs and even ice sculptures. He says that the running joke around the shop is that he is willing to take on any project, even if he has no idea how he is going to make it happen — and he’d like to keep it that way.

“The wild thing for me is that this is uncharted territory,” Good man says. “But I haven’t had to say no yet.”

[DRINK NEWS]

Good Ice uses a high-tech, multi-step process to create the perfect ice. | VIRGINIA HAROLD Jordan Goodman is on a mission to bring St. Louis Good Ice. | VIRGINIA HAROLD

Window Dressing

Twisted Ranch will move to CWE’s Bar Louie space

Written by SARAH FENSKE

Twisted Ranch is the on the move — again.

St. Louis’ infamous ranchdressing-themed restaurant will be moving into the for mer home of Bar Louie in the Central West End, according to paperwor filed with the city’s building department. Restaura teurs im ayden and had llen confirmed to St. Louis Magazine that they plan to close their cur rent location in Soulard.

ar ouie abruptly shuttered the Central West End space in anuary , just two months before O ID 1 caused many, many other restaurants to do the same thing temporarily and un ). The location was one of 38 to be closed across the U.S. as the chain filed for a hapter 11 ban ruptcy reorganization.

s for wisted anch, the eat ery opened on South Eighth Street in Soulard in 15, but soon de camped for a place on South Sev enth with a bigger kitchen. While the restaurant initially earned national headlines — and plenty of local handwringing — for its ranch obsession, it’s found a place

in the local dining scene by offer ing bar grub with a heavy ranch accent in a family friendly atmo sphere. The fact it’s about to take over a , s uare foot space in a relatively pricey neighborhood suggests business must be good.

One small wrinkle: The restau rateurs need approval from the city’s oard of djustment before they can move in. he city’s build ing commissioner denied their re uest for an occupancy permit, and they’ll appeal the denial at a meeting ednesday, December 1 .

ity spo esman Nic Dunne notes the denial was procedural; the way the city’s oning code is written, commercial operations need designated parking, even ones in highly wal able areas like the Central West End. The usual course is to get a denial and then get an exception from the board — which we surmise is all but certain in this case.

The restaurant told St. Louis Magazine it plans to open in early 3. n

Mint Condition

Alcohol and Altruism

Drink some beers to help some animals with Raise a Pint for Pets

Written by DANIEL HILL

This holiday season, pet-loving St. Louis drunks are once again afforded a unique opportunity to spread joy in the world simply by doing what comes naturally: drinking beer.

That’s thanks to Raise a Pint for Pets, the annual booze-based charity campaign that aims to help out our furry friends in animal shelters.

For the sixth year in a row, Urban Chestnut has teamed up with Purina to merge alcoholism with altruism. Purina is donating $5 to local shelters for every 15-pack of Urban Underdog sold.

This year’s campaign comes with a

twist, in the form of new 12-ounce “pup cans” that have been rolled out for the occasion. (As Urban Underdog fans know, the brews are normally sold as 16-ouncers.)

“We’ve been looking for the right opportunity to introduce our first 12-ounce can, and the Raise a Pint for Pets campaign was the perfect time to do this,” David Wolfe, co-own er and cofounder of Urban Chestnut, says in a press release. “Fans of our beers have always supported this campaign, and we’re excited to bring our first-ever 15-pack to help shelter pets in St. Louis.”

The money will be donated to the IMPETUS Coalition, a group of 20 area nonprofits who focus on caring for pets and finding them forever homes. Participating groups include the APA Adoption Center, St. Louis Feral Cat Outreach, Tenth Life Cat Rescue and more.

To date, the Raise a Pint for Pets campaign has raised more than $250,000. It runs through Tuesday, January 31. n

Written by MONICA OBRADOVIC

Andy Cohen has his own flavor of ice cream, and it’s for a good cause.

The homegrown talk-show star and Clementine’s Ice Cream have partnered for the second year in a row to do-

nate a portion of sales of a special “Peppermint Andy” flavor to a local nonprofit.

Fifty percent of the ice cream’s sales will go to Doorways, an organization in St. Louis that provides affordable housing to people living with HIV/AIDS. Last year, Cohen’s partnership with Clementine’s raised $12,000 for Doorways.

“My mom has been heavily involved with Doorways since I came out of the clos et in 1989, and I love supporting them any chance I get,” Cohen said in a statement.

Peppermint Andy was created by Cohen and Clementine’s staff. It features crushed peppermint candies and dark chocolate flakes.

The ice cream is available now at all six Clementine’s locations and online for nationwide shipping. n

Twisted Ranch is heading to the former Bar Louie space in the Central West End. | MABEL SUEN

[FOOD NEWS]

Andy Cohen’s ice cream returns to Clementine’s for a good cause

Andy Cohen’s “Peppermint Andy” flavor is back at Clementine’s. | COURTESY JULIE LALLY

Drink some beer, and help some animals. It’s a win-win! | VIA URBAN CHESTNUT BREWING COMPANY

Let Them Eat

Local

e Armory St. Louis combines local eats and indoor fun

Written by CHERYL BAEHR

On Friday, December 16, the reimagined Armory St. Lou is will open to the public, promising a multi-faceted entertainment experience unlike anything the area has seen. The culmination of a six-year rede velopment effort, the new Armory will be the largest indoor enter tainment attraction in St. Louis, boasting 250,000 square feet of space for recreation, live music, one of the largest video screens in the city, and the St. Louis Tennis Hall of Fame, making it the place in town to gather and play.

And it will have a culinary pro gram to match.

“When I was approached by [Armory developer] Jake Miller, he was telling me about the ven ue, the games, the state-of-theart televisions, and then he said something that really hit home: He wanted to make this St. Lou is,” says St. Louis Armory execu tive chef Brandon Powell. “We talked about the menu and how we could make things that are not overly complicated but things that involve the highest-quality ingre dients made the right way. We also wanted to tie in to the area by making local brands a part of what we do. From there, we just worked it through and know that we want to execute at a level that we can make sure we deliver for St. Louis like we know St. Louis will deliver for us.”

A St. Louis native, Powell comes to the Armory following an 18year career with Fleming’s Prime Steakhouse and Wine Bar in the Los Angeles area and Maestro’s Steakhouse in Beverly Hills. Though he’d tossed around the idea of coming back home to be closer to his family, he was deter mined to do so only for the right opportunity. That came calling in the form of Miller’s job offer to lead the culinary operations for the Armory, which will consist of both a fast-casual, order-fromphone component for drop-in pa

trons and an immense catering outfit that will be able to accom modate up to 600 guests.

Powell is up for the challenge and is excited to show that highquality, from-scratch cooking can be done on such a large scale. With the exception of bread and French fries, everything will be cooked in house, and he is espe cially proud of how well he has been able to incorporate beloved local brands into the Armory’s food offerings. Icons such as Pap py’s barbecue sauces and cole slaw, G&W Sausage and Meats bratwursts, Louisa’s toasted ravi oli and City Scoops ice cream will

all be found on the venue’s menu.

As much as he and his team have focused on the quality of the food they are serving, Powell has put equal emphasis on the diner’s experience. This includes a seam less ordering and delivery process whereby guests order from their phones and pick up at a window when alerted. Powell is also mind ful that the rmory is, first and foremost, a recreation space, so he has designed menu items to be easy to handle for those walking around and using the venue’s facilities.

“We want people to be able to participate in what we are offer ing around the venue, so we’ve

made things easy to pick up and enjoy,” Powell says. “You can pick up your plate, take a bite of your food and carry it with you. We want people to be able to play and interact with the games.”

As for those games, the Armory’s director of marketing, Ali Lamb, notes that the space contains over three football fields’ worth of rec reation activities, such as cornhole, horseshoes, badminton and put ting greens — low-key, fun enter tainment options that are meant to mimic the feel of a house party.

“What we love about this venue is that it is a place to play, gather and relax,” says Lamb. “We talk extensively about this being like a living room or a house party. You take that kind of vibe but multiply it by a thousand.”

Like Powell, Lamb is excited not only for the Armory itself but for the buzz it’s generating around the entire Midtown corridor. Coupled with City Foundry, CITYPARK and several other developments in the area, she believes the area is primed to be a top destination for the entire region — and she and her colleagues are happy that the Armory is a piece of that puzzle.

“We felt that what Midtown needed, first and foremost, was an entertainment hub that will drive traffic,” amb says. “St. ouisans need a place to play, gather and enjoy in the Midtown area, and I feel like we’ve accomplished that with this. I can’t wait to stand on the rooftop of the Armory three to five years from now and see what the area looks like.” n

e Armory is a 250,000 square foot recreation and entertainment venue. | COURTESY ARMORY ST. LOUIS

e Toasted Ravioli Nachos use Louisa’s t-ravs. | COURTESY ARMORY ST. LOUIS

REEFERFRONT TIMES

[WEED LAWS]

Fair Shake

Amendment 3 divided Missouri social-justice leaders. Can an equity o cer be a bridge?

Written by REBECCA RIVAS

This story was originally published by the Missouri Independent.

Longtime cannabis activist Brennan England has gotten lots of undeserved praise since Missourians approved a con stitutional amendment to le galize marijuana on November 8.

As the owner of a private can nabis consumption lounge in St. Louis, England understood why people thought he’d have a “go weed or go home” stance. But it wasn’t that simple for him. He ac tually voted against the measure, which appeared on the ballot as Amendment 3.

“This is not a day of celebration for me, but a day of preparation,” England, state director of Minori ties for Medical Marijuana Mis souri, wrote on Facebook two days after the election. “ he fight for an equitable and accessible cannabis industry in Missouri is not over.”

Amendment 3 created a schism among social-justice activists like England who typically land on the same side of issues — and ten sion is still brewing in the wake of its passage.

The divide was largely over the question of equity.

Was Amendment 3 going to up lift disadvantaged communities by getting rid of minor marijuana charges imprisoning those who can’t afford bail? Was it going to give minority business owners a piece of the pie?

Or was it going to enshrine criminal marijuana infractions into the constitution and cement an already distrusted, inequita ble business licensing system in place, ensuring that the rich just get richer?

One of the first steps in poten tially mending that divide is the appointment of a chief equity of

ficer within 6 days of the mea sure’s effective date on Thurs day, December 8.

Much rides on who is selected for the position by the Department of Health and Senior Services, the state agency tasked with oversee ing the marijuana program.

“ he chief e uity officer is re ally, really important to this process,” says Justice Gaston, a spokesperson for the Legal Mis souri campaign. “ his is go ing to be watched and scrutinized very closely because of the situ ation with medical [marijuana].”

he chief e uity officer will oversee the equity measure that Amendment 3 supporters boast to be the first of its ind in the nation — a microlicense program designed to boost opportunities in the industry for businesses in disadvantaged communities. That person is also responsible for educating the public about the program and potentially pro ducing reports about minority participation in the marijuana industry.

While Gaston is a paid employee with the Legal MO campaign, she also leads the Kansas City advo cacy group Reale Justice Network, which provides bail-out support for mothers who are often im prisoned on nonviolent mari

juana charges. She and others in her organization strongly believe Amendment 3 will improve lives, and they plan on making sure it’s an equitable process.

“This is our baby,” Gaston says, “and so it’s just been birthed, and we want to make sure that our baby is strong.”

But England and others argue Amendment 3 doesn’t have the legal teeth to ensure minority in clusion in the industry.

“There are no incentives or re percussions for existing license holders to have adequate and ef fective social-equity provisions,” England wrote in his Facebook post, “so Legal MO’s chief equity officer is going to have to be uite the charmer.”

What does the chief equity officer do?

DHSS will soon be posting the eq uity officer position to Mo areers, the state’s job board, and it will be “filled through the normal com petitive hiring process,” a depart ment spokesperson says.

By law, the department must select someone by Monday, Feb ruary 6.

And while some are looking to their state legislators to push for an e uity officer with integrity, Amendment 3 also states that

“elected officials” can’t “interfere directly or indirectly” with the department’s facilitation of the marijuana program.

One of the first things the e uity officer will do is help design the microlicense application pro cess. he department has 3 days from Thursday, December 8, to issue the first set of microli censes, a minimum of 48.

hen, days after the depart ment begins issuing the licenses and the e uity officer ensures they went to eligible applicants, the department will issue another 48 licenses. Repeat on the 548-day mark, and that brings the total to 144 microlicenses at minimum.

In each round, there will be at least six microlicenses issued in each of the state’s eight congres sional districts — at least two for dispensaries and at least four for wholesale facilities.

Applicants have to meet one of six requirements: have lived be low the poverty line three of the last 1 years, be a disabled vet eran, have been convicted of a nonviolent marijuana charge in the last year or be the spouse or guardian of such person, live in an area with high poverty or high marijuana incarceration rates, or have graduated from an unac credited school district.

Adolphus Pruitt, president of the St. Louis City NAACP chapter, was among those who pushed for the microlicense program and its application requirements.

Currently, one of the biggest struggles for many smaller med ical-marijuana companies is ob taining capital, Pruitt says. Mari juana is still illegal on a federal level, so bank loans are not an option.

“For somebody who has not had the finances and the ability to compete with the bigger folks, we see those microlicenses as no different from microbreweries in the beer business,” he says.

Addressing racial disparities in the industry

The NAACP was a prime example of the rift Amendment 3 caused.

While some local chapter lead ers like Pruitt supported it early on, the Missouri NAACP an nounced its opposition in late September and issued the Legal MO campaign a cease-and-desist letter to keep the NAACP logo off

Cannabis activist Brennan England speaks at an educational event about medical marijuana. | REBECCA RIVAS/THE MISSOURI INDEPENDENT

its promo materials.

Nimrod Chapel Jr., president of the Missouri NAACP, told the Independent in September that the proposal had the financial bac ing of many of the state’s largest medical-marijuana license hold ers who are trying to “carve out the entire market for themselves.”

“They’re certainly Caucasian run, led and owned,” he said of the current medical-marijuana license holders, “and minority participation has been completely left out of the equation.”

At the heart of the opponents’ concern with Amendment 3 are caps on licenses to grow, trans port and sell marijuana that were imposed by state regulators after voters created Missouri’s medicalmarijuana program in 18.

The state decided to only issue the minimum number of licenses allowed for medical marijuana — 6 cultivation licenses, 1 dis pensary licenses and 86 manu facturing licenses. Since then, the state has issued around ad ditional licenses, including some that were ordered to be issued by the administrative hearing com mission due to irregularities in the application scoring process.

Few licenses went to Blackowned businesses.

Amendment 3 allows the state to continue capping licenses while giving current medical-marijuana license holders first dibs on the more lucrative recreational li censes.

When DHSS began building the bidding process for medicalmarijuana licenses, state lawmak ers, the Missouri Legislative Black Caucus, business leaders and the Missouri Medical Cannabis Trade Association urged regulators to ensure there was racial diversity in the medical-marijuana market place.

Democratic state Senators Steve Roberts and Karla May of St. Louis say they spoke directly with DHSS leadership in early 1 as ing for the application process to in clude the Minority Business En terprise program, which would give a set amount of bonus points in a competitive bidding process to businesses that are at least 51 percent owned and controlled by one or more minority persons.

The trade association also en couraged DHSS to focus on diver sity in ownership as well.

“For most large State of Mis souri contracts, everything from IT services to road construction, some consideration, including points, are awarded for MBE/WBE participation,” according to an pril 3, 1 , letter from ndrew Mullins, executive director of Mo CannTrade, to the medical mari juana advisory committee. “Medi cal marijuana licensing should not be excluded from these same considerations.”

Those requests were ignored.

Under Amendment 3, new li cense applicants — not current medical-marijuana license hold ers who will be grandfathered into adult-use licenses — can sub mit “voluntary plans” on ways to promote minority inclusion. But it’s not a prerequisite.

Roberts told the Independent after the election that the depart ment has yet to ma e any signifi cant effort to fix the racial dispar ity in licensing.

“ e will continue to fight for e uity,” Roberts said.

Tracking minority inclusion

Pruitt is hopeful an annual report the chief e uity officer will li ely help compile could be the path forward for minority inclusion goals.

y anuary 1, , the measure states the department shall pre pare a publicly available report that provides “aggregate data for each type of license.”

Pruitt says the report should in clude demographic characteris tics of business owners and their employees — which would put the state one step closer toward weighing racial diversity in the license application process.

But in order for Missouri to stave off court challenges against such a move, the state must con duct a “disparity study.” Pruitt says the aggregate data would serve the same purpose as a dis parity study.

“Without having data, there ain’t much we can do,” Pruitt says. “If the state enacts [minor ity participation] goals without data, they sue and we lose. We’ve been down that road before.”

A DHSS spokesperson con firmed that the chief e uity of ficer will li ely contribute to the annual report, “but the content of the report has not yet been devel oped.” n

CULTURE

Don’t Miss

Do yourself a favor and take a (short) break from the holidays to check out some art at these five exhibits

Written by JESSICA ROGEN, KASEY NOSS AND ROSALIND EARLY

It’s go time for the holiday sea son. While that’s pretty much top-notch delightful most of the time, it can also be — to be frank — really redundant to look at all those beautifully decorated trees, bright lights, Christmas-oriented sale advertisements and mulledwine recipes all the time.

So do yourself a favor and take an art break. Sneak out during lunch, grab yourself an hour this weekend or attend the many first , second or third riday art events that the city has to offer, and experience the relief and joy that comes from checking out something beautiful, thought pro voking or just different. Plus, the following exhibits can be taken in during a short break or carefully perused if you need a whole after noon to soak up some happiness.

1. See some beautiful fabrics at the Saint Louis Art Museum’s Global Threads: The Art and Fashion of Indian Chintz. The exhibition tells the story of In dian chintz, a fabric as revolution ary as it is beautiful. rom the 1 th century onward, this cotton textile, which Indian artisans spent cen turies perfecting, dominated the global textile scene. Coveted for its brilliant colors and intricate de signs, chintz transformed fashion, industry and global trade, and was sought everywhere from East Asia to Egypt to Great Britain.

The exhibit runs through Sunday, January 8, 2023. Tickets are $12 for adults, $10 for seniors and stu dents, and $6 for children ages 6 to 12. It is free on Fridays — and anytime for museum members.

2. Literally color on the walls at the Missouri History Museum’s Coloring STL.

This interactive show invites at tendees to learn about St. Louis architectural history by drawing on the walls of a 6,000-square-foot special exhibition space printed with illustrations of 50 local struc tures on a whiteboard-like mate rial. In addition to the walls, there are exhibits in the center that dig into some truly interesting lo cal history, answering important questions like, “What else might the Arch have looked like?” and “What are those metal stars on buildings there for?”

The exhibit is free and runs through Sunday, May 5, 2024.

3. Discover great local artists making world-class stuff at the Contemporary Art Museum’s Great Rivers Biennial. The every-other-year exhibit aims to foster artistic talent in the greater St. Louis metro area. This year’s honorees are Yowshien

Kuo, Jon Young and Yvonne Osei. Their works are bright, bold and fun to look at, ranging from sculp tures and fabric designs to South west inflected paintings.

The exhibit is open through Sun day, February 12, 2023, and admis sion is free.

4. Learn about a groundbreak ing Black female sculpture at the Pulitzer Art Foundation’s Chase-Riboud Monumentale: The Bronzes.

If you’re at CAM and want to keep the art party going, head to the Pulit er rts oundation, which is celebrating Barbara Chase-Ri boud’s career with a retrospec tive exhibit. The show includes 50 of her most striking sculptures and works on paper, such as her award-winning poetry.

The exhibit is free and is open through Sunday, February 5, 2023.

5. Make your eyeballs happy by checking out the wild colors in the Mildred Lane Kemper Art Museum’s Studio Paintings, 1988-2022: Returns, Revisions, Inventions.

Visiting the Kemper’s Katharina Grosse exhibition is like stum bling into a contemporary won derland of bright colors, bold pat terns and unusual materials. It features 3 large scale canvases, which is reason enough to visit. Grosse is known for her site-spe cific wor , and it’s rare for her to show paintings.

The free exhibit is open through Monday, January 23, 2023. n

Yowshien Kuo’s Two Right Feet, Snake Eyes and Cherry Pie. | COURTESY THE ARTIST / LUCE GALLERY. Visitors color during a member preview. | COURTESY MISSOURI HISTORY MUSEUM

From le : Katharina Grosse’s Untitled, 2008 and Untitled, 2008. | VIRGINIA HAROLD

Storytelling

New Humans of St. Louis book celebrates stories of real-life people

Written by JESSICA ROGEN

Imagine that you’re working on self-publishing a book. It’s been five years of ups and downs of fundraising and editing. Now, it’s finally here on your door step — all 3, 5 copies on 1 pal lets — and it’s time to get them in the hands of your readers.

Earlier this year, that was the scenario faced by indy Drew and Dessa Somerside, authors of the Humans of St. Louis boo , who spent a month of late nights in the basement of ig rothers ig Sis ters getting everything pac aged for delivery or drop off.

“ e had so many volunteers help us,” Drew says. “My mom came out. My partner came out. he friends that we dance with at lub iva came out. People just wanted to help us.”

hat community support spea s to the very heart of the umans of St. ouis organi ation, which cel ebrated the launch of its boo last Saturday at the Schlafly Public i brary.

local nonprofit, the group — also nown as OS — has been sharing the stories and pho tographs of St. ouis people and places on social media with the aim to promote “civic engage ment and social good” since 1 . Drew, who was a social wor stu dent at ashington niversity at the time, founded the organi a tion with Caroline Fish after see ing the original umans of New or account.

Drew’s bac ground is in docu mentary street photography, and that uic ly showed up in her OS wor . She’d set out on her bi e with her camera, pedaling up and down the city’s streets until she found someone to interview.

“I’ll just ind of give people the time that they need to let their sto ries unfold,” she says, explaining she aims to get to a place of com fort. “So that by the end, they feel li e, ou now what, I really en joyed this tal . hether you put it on your website or you don’t, it was a really beautiful moment be tween strangers.’”

Drew and others began by posting the interviews to aceboo , expanding to other social media platforms over time. he stories spread organically and the platform came to have a huge follow ing. hen, OS expanded to storytelling in partnership with other organi ations, creating stories about St. ouis health, arts, race, cre ativity and more.

ut as OS produced more stories, Drew reali ed that the older ones were getting buried. She’d seen other umans accounts pro duce boo s and thought that might wor in St. ouis, too, and the rest of the OS team uic ly concurred.

hey found a publisher to wor with but then had oth er thoughts and opted to go it alone. But how?

“ e didn’t have a penny in the ban to do it,” Drew says. “ ut we thought the idea might be supported by the community.”

OS launched a ic starter campaign, putting together a pro motional video and moc ups of what the book might look like.

ithin three wee s, the group had made it.

rom the time the ic starter wrapped up to having those pallets delivered was about four years of selecting the stories to include, trac ing down the interviewees and getting permission, editing, and figuring out printing snafus. Drew and Somerside didn’t put it

together all by themselves rather, they invited a team of editors in an effort to get as many voices as pos sible into the book.

aving the finished product in hand after all that feels really good, Drew explains.

“It’s so cool to finally see it in people’s hands,” Drew says. “It’s so neat to finally see the end products, not anything li e what I thought it would be. he boo ended up being a lot thic er, a lot bigger, a lot heavier, a lot more dense than we anticipated, just because we wanted to include so

many stories from fol s and really ma e it seamless.”

Somerside agrees, add ing that it’s “li e a mix of a relief and also a sadness because I run into people every day, and they’re li e, Oh my od, I really wanted to get a copy.’”

hat’s right Every one of the 3, 5 boo s on the 1 pallets has been accounted for — though there are still boo s available in local bookstores.

So Somerside and Drew are in the midst of planning another print run. There is a preorder list on the web site. Once there’s enough orders, they’ll put in for an other printing.

In the meantime, they’re just enjoying the impact the first printing is having on the St. ouis community.

“It’s been ama ing,” Som erside says. “I too one to the mayor of Maplewood, and she had tears in her eyes. She was so moved because it’s about our city and real life people.”

“People are writing us private messages saying, I was supposed to go to bed at this time tonight, but I just eep flipping through the pages’ I came home, and I read it cover to cover, and I’m so inspired,’” Drew says. “ hat’s been really special.” n

Find bookstore locations or get on the preorder list for the next print run at humansofstl.org.

Humans of St. Louis is gearing up for a second print run of the book, and there’s a preorder list on its website. | COURTESY HOSTL

e book has been five years in the making. | COURTESY HOSTL

MUSIC

A Fruitful Endeavor

With its eclectic mix of influences, Punk Lady Apple is one of St. Louis’ most exciting new acts

Written by DELIA RAINEY

As a new band, Punk Lady Ap ple proved itself early on. he five piece group played nonstop shows this past summer, uic ly ma ing a name for itself in St. ouis’ pun and roc scenes and estab lishing a clear voice, with tough yet sincere vocals on ueer love and an invigorating rush of pun , alternative roc and .

“It was super sweet from the very beginning,” lead songwriter arris illiams says of the St. ou is music community. “ he band was received so warmly from the start. Everyone just held us up from the first show on, which in spired us to go on the summer run that we did.”

ed by illiams on rhythm gui tar and lead vocals, Pun ady Apple is a dream team of talented instrumentalists. here’s Madison annon on bass and Native Sound ecordings owner David eeman on drums. ead guitarist esse Edmister has been in other local bands over the years, including current project uc y Shells. El exus Adams, on keytar, keys and bac ing vocals, is also a profes sional jazz pianist.

lthough “pun ” comes with the name, Punk Lady Apple has an open mind about genre.

“We started as a punk band when I was writing more pun y songs at the start of the project in 1,” illiams explains. “I was very protective of that label and wanted to retain being a pun band, but to be honest, we’re more of a roc band in general.”

he band’s members attribute its sound to a combination of eclectic influences Sade, Oasis, Mariah arey, ran Ocean and Dead en

nedys. Its ever shifting composi tion styles all have an energetic passion in common, as does a pun song and an song.

In the past, Williams had done some solo work as a rapper and pro ducer. She and annon had been scheming to ma e music together for uite some time but never got around to it. The opportunity to collaborate finally came in 1 at the local scene’s annual alloween cover show. illiams, annon and dams won over the audience with their covers of ’ s girl group .

Williams used that momentum to bring her friends together to form Punk Lady Apple, promptly playing their first gig at a house show in November 2021. The band has been playing fre uently ever since, feeling right at home at local venues such as the Sin hole, eavy nchor, Off roadway and various DI spaces.

Pun ady pple’s songs came from illiams’ decision to focus on guitar again since learning the instrument as a child. She began writing guitar based songs and lyrics in mid and brought structural ideas and demos to Pun ady pple’s band practices in 1. In uic succession, those songs grew into recordings. Pun Lady Apple released its debut selftitled EP this past October, record ed at eeman’s well established

local studio, Native Sound ecord ings, in south city.

he four trac s on the EP each highlight the different strengths and styles of the band, comple menting each other and standing alone. “Paramour” is a groov ing song with tropical eys and echoey, brooding guitar, as il liams’ hypnotic vocals serenade “I’ve got no girls today / just you and your weight.” distorted, throbbing guitar solo turns up the psychedelia a notch, edging out of the chorus and ending the song dreamily.

The listener will wake up when trac two, “Steppin,” comes on, jolting into a tough and hard mood “I’m stepping on names / I’m step ping on facts.” his is a confident pun roc song, unafraid of nega tive space to emphasi e slamming noise, with lyrics about being a frea y bitch, a “rainbow with the rats.” he spitting verses and in struments step bac and forth li e boots on pavement, then free-fall into a wonderfully di ying shoe ga ey segment of eys and sound. “ ome Dear” offers the most da ling melody of the EP, drawn up and down by illiams’ gui tar and dams’ spar ling eys. he lyrics about apartment dra ma switch bac and forth from tension to the verse’s carefree, smooth energy, then illiams’

screaming clashes out on the last refrain “I just ripped the carpet off the fuc ing floor.”

Pun ady pple’s genre shifts continue until the final trac , a tribute to old school and soul, with a cover of Otis ed ding’s “ hese rms of Mine.” il liams’ heartfelt voice yearns in bursts against guest instrumen talist Sam olden’s rising violin, ending the EP with an earnest call for letting love in. his emotional tenderness is what the band is all about, according to illiams.

“ his music is about being soft and vulnerable,” she explains. “Even when we’re playing a rag er, we’re probably mad or dis satisfied because we were hurt or let down in some way. Staying connected with vulnerability and poetry is sort of the point of the music we’re doing here.”

Pun ady pple is about to cel ebrate its one year birthday at So rority ouse on Saturday, Decem ber 1 , after ta ing a well deserved gig hiatus. he band has been wor ing on new songs, hoping to record again in the near future. s it transitions from the “new band” label to a more established St. ou is act, it will be exciting to follow Pun ady pple’s fruitfulness.

“I thin our sound is still getting sharpened,” illiams says. “ lways with a pun spirit, though.” n

Punk Lady Apple released a four-track self-titled EP in October. | VIA THE BAND

Serious Holiday Magic

e Rep’s A Christmas Carol pulls out all the stops to create wonder and holiday cheer

Written by ROSALIND EARLY

A Christmas Carol

Written by Charles Dickens. Adapted for the stage by Michael Wilson. Directed by Hana S. Sharif. Presented by the Rep through Friday, December 30. Times vary. Tickets are $23 to $92.

AChristmas Carol, like The Nutcrack er, is a Christmas standard, and the Rep (Loretto Hilton Center 130 Edgar Road, Webster Groves; 314-9684925) has brought back its production from last year, with all of the concomitant thrills and delights. The show is just as sure to get you into the Christmas spirit as wearing an ugly Christmas sweater while drinking eggnog under mistletoe: That’s how Christmas-y it is.

Based on the novella by Charles Dickens, the story follows miserly Ebenezer Scrooge, who runs a counting house with an underpaid clerk named Bob Cratchit. Cratchit has to beg to get Christmas Day off because Scrooge does not believe in charity, even at Christmas.

The bah-humbug-spouting Scrooge is then famously visited by the ghost of his deceased business partner, Jacob Marley, who warns him that he better get right with Christmas or he’s going to be fettered in chains for the afterlife. Scrooge is then visited by the spirits of Christmas Past, Christmas Present and

STAGE

Christmas Yet to Come, and he finds the true meaning of Christmas.

But, of course, you already know the story of A Christmas Carol and Tiny Tim and “God bless us, every one!” You’ve probably even seen it or read it. Maybe more than once. But the Rep’s AChristmas Carol is worth the effort to attend, not only because it has fun concessions such as hot chocolate, specialty cocktails and flavored popcorn but also because the show is a lavish production of a feel-good classic and imbued with wonder. The Rep, in other words, brings the magic.

In this version, dancers from Big Muddy Dance Company and others twirl, flip and fly around, while ghosts, furniture and more rise dramatically from under the stage. Rounding out the magic are beautiful costumes and sets, falling snow and shimmery bursts of confetti.

The cast includes Guiesseppe Jones, who as Scrooge takes us through his transformation from self-important grouch to generous mensch who wants to host Christmas festivities for the first time in his life. Bob Cratchit, played by Armando McClain, is immensely relatable as he nicely and deferentially tries to convince his bad boss to let him have a day off. But, certainly, the funniest character is Michael James Reed doing double duty as Mrs. Dilber and the ghost Marley. Mrs. Dilber offers the right punctuation of humor throughout a sometimes-heavy story, and Marley’s entrance to the stage steals the show.

Of course, A Christmas Carol is nothing without kids. The ensembles — led by youth director Adena Varner with choreography from Robert Crenshaw — shine whether the kids are rapping, dancing, singing or being Victorian-era street urchins.

Though A Christmas Carol is a familiar story, this production makes it new again. n

e Rep’s production charms for the second year in a row. | T. Charles Erickson Photo

OUT EVERY NIGHT

Each week, we bring you our picks for the best concerts of the next seven days! To submit your show for con sideration, visit https://bit.ly/3bgnwXZ. All events are subject to change, espe cially in the age of COVID-19, so do check with the venue for the most up-to-date information before you head out for the night. And, of course, be sure that you are aware of the venues’ COVID-safety requirements, as those vary from place to place, and you don’t want to get stuck outside because you forgot your mask or proof of vaccination. Happy showgoing!

THURSDAY 8

ALEX WILLIAMS: 8 p.m., $15/$20. Old Rock House, 1200 S. 7th St., St. Louis, 314-588-0505.

BIG BAD VOODOO DADDY: 8 p.m., $25-$65. Lindenwood University’s J. Scheidegger Center for the Arts, 2300 W. Clay St., St. Charles, 636-949-4433.

THE BOSMAN TWINS: 8 p.m., $20. Joe’s Cafe, 6014 Kingsbury Ave, St. Louis.

CHRISTMAS IN ST. LOUIS: w/ Erin Bode and the St. Louis Christmas Carols Association 5:30 p.m., free. Missouri History Museum, 5700 Lindell Blvd., St. Louis, 314-746-4599.

DREW SHEAFOR: 5 p.m., free. Das Bevo Biergarten, 4749 Gravois Ave., St. Louis, 314-224-5521.

IVAS JOHN (SPECIAL EDITION): 7 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

LEO KOTTKE: 8 p.m., $35-$50. The Sheldon, 3648 Washington Blvd., St. Louis, 314-533-9900.

PEACH PIT: 8 p.m., $27.50/$125. The Pageant, 6161 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

PIERCE CRASK: 4 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

THE WEE HEAVIES: 8:30 p.m., $15. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

FRIDAY 9

105.7 THE POINT PRESENTS: PUNK ROCK CHRISTMAS: 8 p.m., $25. Delmar Hall, 6133 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

AMY GRANT: w/ Michael W. Smith 7:30 p.m., $77-$309. The Fox Theatre, 527 N. Grand Blvd., St. Louis, 314-534-1111.

ANOTHER MESSED UP XMAS PARTY: w/ Frodo The Ghost & Sawblade, AZ The Fallen, Donnie Tzunami, Kommon Groundz, Lyght Strife, Madcountybeats, Rev Rust, Mr. Grean, RoNDouGH 7 p.m., $10-$15. Pop’s Nightclub, 401 Monsanto Ave., East St. Louis, 618-274-6720.

CHERI EVANS BAND: 7 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

CHRISTMAS CANDLELIGHT CONCERT: 7:30 p.m., $30-$85. Powell Hall, 718 N. Grand Blvd, St. Louis, 314-534-1700.

ENEMY OF MAGIC: w/ Horse Magik, Freddy Vs. 8:30 p.m., free. CBGB, 3163 S. Grand Blvd., St. Louis.

JOE PASTOR TRIO: 8 p.m., $20. O’Connell’s Pub, 4652 Shaw Ave., St. Louis, 314-773-6600.

MEGADUNE: w/ Euphoria, Sleepaway, Wayside 8 p.m., $12. Red Flag, 3040 Locust Street, St. Louis, 314-289-9050.

MIKE ZITO: w/ The Steepwater Band 8 p.m., $20/$25. Old Rock House, 1200 S. 7th St., St. Louis, 314-588-0505.

THE PRINCE EXPERIENCE: 8 p.m., $20. The Hawthorn, 2225 Washington Avenue, St. Louis.

THE RETRONERDS ‘80S DANCE PARTY: 5 p.m.-1:30 a.m., $10. The Attic Music Bar, 4247 S. Kingshighway, nd floor, St. ouis, 31 3 6 5313.

ROY AND JOE SING CHRISTMAS: 6 p.m., free. Das Bevo Biergarten, 4749 Gravois Ave., St. Louis,

Blessed w/ Stuck, Yuppy, Shady Bug

8 p.m. Friday, December 9. e Heavy Anchor, 5226 Gravois Avenue. $11 to $15. 314-352-5226.

Experimental music implies some degree of chaos by name alone, but Blessed controls its cacophony with several steady hands — eight, to be specific. Where the Canadian art rock outfit does experiment is through an inventive cross-stitching of styles that incorporates taut punkish beats and prog-leaning riffs in service of melodic

314-224-5521.

SHELBY RINGDAHL: 7:30 p.m., $20. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

SIR EDDIE C: w/ KV the Writer, Zado 9 p.m., $10$15. Central Stage, 3524 Washington Avenue, St. Louis, 314-533-0367.

STAR BIZARRE: w/ Eve Maret, Axiom Federation, DJ Matchess, DJ Ghost Ice 8:30 p.m., $10$14. Pop’s Blue Moon, 5249 Pattison Ave., St. Louis, 314-776-4200.

STUCK: w/ Shady Bug, Yuppy, Blessed 8 p.m., $10. The Heavy Anchor, 5226 Gravois Ave., St. Louis, 314-352-5226.

SWEETIE AND THE TOOTHACHES: 10 p.m., $8. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

THIRD SIGHT BAND: 10:30 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis,

leads. Singer and guitarist Drew Riekman lends a sense of commanding calm to the band’s subtly structured math rock, offering an entry point for those just looking to hear a good hook. This year’s Circuitous album offers a further exploration of Blessed’s dense aural canvas with a marked progression in production and a heavy infusion of synthesizer that further colors each song. The record ranges from disparate valleys of chilled indie rock to sonorous walls of guitar noise, but every sound works toward emotional peaks that feel carefully built up. Blessed comes to St.

Louis at the tail end of a nearly monthlong tour across North America with Chicago-based noise rockers Stuck — an unbeatable combo, as long as you bring earplugs.

314-436-5222.

TRAMPLED BY TURTLES: 8 p.m., $30. The Pageant, 6161 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

SATURDAY 10

ALL ROOSTERED UP: noon, free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

ALLMAN FAMILY REVIVAL: 8 p.m., $49.50-$79.50. he actory, 1 1 5 N Outer d, hesterfield, 314-423-8500.

AMERICAN CHAMBER CHORALE & ORCHESTRA: 7:30 p.m., free. Salem in Ladue United Methodist Church, 1200 S. Lindbergh Blvd., Frontenac, 314-991-0546.

BLIND MAN’S BLUFF: 5 p.m.-1:30 a.m., $10. The Attic Music Bar, 4247 S. Kingshighway, 2nd floor, St. ouis, 31 3 6 5313.

BOO BOO DAVIS & THE GROOVE CUTTERS: 10 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway,

St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

—Joseph Hess

One-Two Punch: It’s hard to call any band on this show an “opener,” because both Yuppy and Shady Bug have raised the bar for inventive songwriting under the wide and all-encompassing umbrella of indie rock in St. Louis. Both groups recently spent time in the studio, which means brand new recordings are on the way en masse. Please be excited.

DALE ROBERTS: 7 p.m., $5. Spine Indie Bookstore & Cafe, 1976-82 Arsenal St., St. Louis, 314-925-8087.

DAN KELLEY CHRISTMAS SHOW BENEFITTING

READY READERS: w/ Ben Diesel, the Stars Go Out, River Miles, Holy Hand Grenades 8 p.m., $10. The Heavy Anchor, 5226 Gravois Ave., St. Louis, 314-352-5226.

DOLLY DISCO: THE DOLLY PARTON COUNTRY

WESTERN DISCO DANCE PARTY: 9 p.m., $12-$25. Delmar Hall, 6133 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

AN EVENING WITH STEVE ROSS: 7:30 p.m., $25.

Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

FLEETWOOD & FAMILY: w/ WSG, Jamie Gooch & the Grassfed Funk 10 p.m., $10. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis,

Blessed. | VIA ARTIST BANDCAMP

314-621-8811.

HOT HANDS WONDERLAND: 8 p.m., free. Maggie O’Brien’s, 3828 S Lindbergh Blvd, St Louis, 314-842-7678.

IVAS JOHN BAND: 7 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

JASON VIEAUX: 7:30 p.m., $20-$39. The 560 Music Center, 560 Trinity Ave., University City, 314-421-3600.

THE LISTON BROS.: 8 p.m., $29.95-$49.95. The Pag eant, 6161 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

MATCHESS: w/ Dail Chambers 8 p.m., $10. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Ave., St. Louis, 314-498-6989.

THE RUM DRUM RAMBLERS: 8 p.m., $15-$20. Joe’s Cafe, 6014 Kingsbury Ave, St. Louis.

SHREK RAVE: 7:30 p.m., $15-$20. Red Flag, 3040 Locust Street, St. Louis, 314-289-9050.

TRANS-SIBERIAN ORCHESTRA: 7:30 p.m., $26.99$99.50. Enterprise Center, 1401 Clark Ave., St. Louis, 314-241-1888.

TVBOO: 7 p.m., $18-$20. Old Rock House, 1200 S. 7th St., St. Louis, 314-588-0505.

TYE PERRY PROJECT: 3 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

A VERY AWFUL DOUBLE F GANG CHRISTMAS: w/ Egan’s Rats, Luh Davey, J-Rebel, Deezymann, Too Tall Baby, Chilly Brisk, Striff noon, $10. Misty Nights Bar & Grill, 4241 N St. Peters Pkwy, St. Peters, 636-922-9497.

SUNDAY 11

BOB ROW ORGAN TRIO: 6 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

DREW LANCE: 2 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

FLIGHT JACKET: w/ Casualrad, Natural High, Roseshands 8 p.m., $12. Red Flag, 3040 Locust Street, St. Louis, 314-289-9050.

GENESIS JAZZ BIG BAND: 3 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

THE LISTON BROTHERS: w/ Abigail Stahlschmidt, Saxual Healing 7 p.m., $29.95-$49.95. The Pag eant, 6161 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

LOVE JONES “THE BAND”: 8:30 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

ROCKY MOUNTAIN HIGH EXPERIENCE: A JOHN DENVER CHRISTMAS: 3 p.m., $63. The Pageant, 6161 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

SAMMY ADAMS: 8 p.m., $18/$20. Old Rock House, 1200 S. 7th St., St. Louis, 314-588-0505.

SEASON OF LIGHT: 7 p.m., $20. Manchester United Methodist Church, 129 Woods Mill Road, Manchester, 636-394-7506.

MONDAY 12

JASON STEIN / DAMON SMITH / ADAM SHEAD: w/ Dave Stone / Aarron Smith 8 p.m., $20. O’Connell’s Pub, 4652 Shaw Ave., St. Louis, 314-773-6600.

J.D. HUGHES: 5 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

MAX: w/ Vincint 8 p.m., $30. Delmar Hall, 6133 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

SOULARD BLUES BAND: 9 p.m., $5. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

THIRD SIGHT BAND: 8 p.m., $10. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

TUESDAY 13

ANDREW DAHLE: 9 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

ANTICHRIST SIEGE MACHINE: w/ Miasmatic Necrosis, Thantifaxath 7:30 p.m., $15/$18. The Sinkhole, 7423 South Broadway, St. Louis, 314-328-2309.

BRYAN ENG: 7:30 p.m., $20. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

KELTIC REIGN: 7 p.m., $15. The Sheldon, 3648

Matchess w/ Dail Chambers, DJ Crim Dolla Cray

8 p.m. Saturday, December 10. O Broadway, 3509 Lemp Avenue. $10 to $20. 314-498-6989.

After two plus years of hosting online streaming shows in the wake of the coronavirus pandemic, New Music Circle returned to live concerts in 2022 with its 64th season, which has thus far featured a world-class lineup of prolific artists operating in and around contemporary music and experimental jazz. It’s no surprise, then, that the organization called on Matchess, the ambient project of prolific sound artist Whitney Johnson, to provide a portal of contemplative noise to cap off what’s been a historic and eventful

Washington Blvd., St. Louis, 314-533-9900.

LANGHORNE SLIM: w/ Lilly Hiatt 8 p.m., $25-$30. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Ave., St. Louis, 314-498-6989.

ST. LOUIS SOCIAL CLUB: 7 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

WEDNESDAY 14

THE BEACH BOYS: 7:30 p.m., $49-$129. The Fox The atre, 527 N. Grand Blvd., St. Louis, 314-534-1111.

BIG RICH MCDONOUGH & THE RHYTHM RENEGADES: 7 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

BITCHIN BAJAS: w/ Heavy Pauses 8 p.m., $12/$15. The Sinkhole, 7423 South Broadway, St. Louis, 314-328-2309.

BUTCH MOORE: 4:30 p.m., free. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

DIZZY ATMOSPHERE: 7:30 p.m., $15. Blue Straw-

Matchess. | VIA ARTIST BANDCAMP

year. Matchess’ new record Sonescent, released through Drag City Records earlier this year, offers a deliberate concoction of meditative drones and melodic compositions funneled from Johnson’s stream of consciousness. Sounds feel plucked from luminous trees and carefully ushered into reality as the two lone songs, each representing a side of the record, emerge from a loose structure of sonic gradients. Johnson’s approach to delivering Matchess in a live setting is equally deliberate and ethereal. But Wait, There’s More: Although the end of 2022 is nigh, New Music Circle’s 64th season will continue well into the new year, with upcoming performances by Jessica Ackerly, Patrick Shiroishi, Madalyn Merkey, Brandon Lopez Quartet and Anna Webber’s Shimmer/Wince.

—Joseph Hess

berry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

PETER MAYER NIGHT 1: 7:30 p.m., $28-$35. Delmar Hall, 6133 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

THIS IS CASUALLY HAPPENING: A COMEDY SHOWCASE: w/ Max Pryce, Larry Greene, Mollie Amburgey, Ellie Kirchhoefer 7 p.m., $15. The Golden Hoosier, 3707 S Kingshighway Blvd, Saint Louis, (314) 354-8044.

VOODOO CCR: 9 p.m., $10. Broadway Oyster Bar, 736 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-621-8811.

THIS JUST IN

ANNE BURNELL AND MARK BURNELL: Wed., Dec. 28, 7 p.m., $15-$20. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

ARLIE: Sat., Feb. 18, 8 p.m., $15. Blueberry Hill -

The Duck Room, 6504 Delmar Blvd., University City, 314-727-4444.

BANDTOGETHER: Sat., Dec. 17, 8 p.m., free. The 560 Music Center, 560 Trinity Ave., University City, 314-421-3600.

THE BOULET BROTHERS’ DRAGULA: Mon., April 24, 8 p.m., $44.50-$78. The Pageant, 6161 Delmar Blvd., St. Louis, 314-726-6161.

BRET MICHAELS: Fri., July 28, 7 p.m., $26$250.50. Hollywood Casino Amphitheatre, I-70 & Earth City Expwy., Maryland Heights, 314-298-9944.

CHEEKFACE: Thu., April 6, 8 p.m., $16. Blueberry Hill - The Duck Room, 6504 Delmar Blvd., University City, 314-727-4444.

CHRIS SHEPHERD BAND: Tue., Dec. 20, 7 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

THE CHRIS SHEPHERD BAND: Sun., Dec. 18, 3 p.m., $20. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

DENISE THIMES: Sat., Jan. 7, 7:30 p.m., $25. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

ENEMY OF MAGIC EP RELEASE SHOW: Subtropolis, Seashine, Sat., Jan. 7, 8 p.m., $10. The Heavy Anchor, 5226 Gravois Ave., St. Louis, 314-352-5226.

FARSHID ETNIKO AND JD HUGHES: Thu., Dec. 29, 7:30 p.m., $15. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

FLYING HOUSE: W/ Mike Martin & the Sticky Keys, Melissa Russell, Fri., Jan. 27, 7:30 p.m., $12. Off Broadway, 3509 Lemp Ave., St. Louis, 314-498-6989.

GRAHAM CURRY AND THE MISSOURI FURY: Sat., Dec. 17, 8 p.m., $15. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

IAN MUNSICK: Sat., March 11, 8 p.m., $28$49.50. The Factory, 17105 N Outer 40 Rd, hesterfield, 31 3 85 .

JESUS CHRIST SUPERCAR VINYL RELEASE SHOW: W/ Cave Radio, Blinded By Stereo, Sat., Dec. 17, 7 p.m., $15. Old Rock House, 1200 S. 7th St., St. Louis, 314-588-0505.

JIM STEVENS & THE VIBE: Thu., Dec. 22, 7 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

JOE METZKA BAND: Thu., Dec. 15, 7 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

KINGDOM BROTHERS BAND: Sat., Dec. 17, 10 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

ONE TOO MANY: Sun., Dec. 18, 4 p.m., $12. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

PC BAND & TERRY ROGERS: Fri., Dec. 16, 10 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

THE RICTERS: Fri., Feb. 17, 7:30 p.m., $10. Blueberry Hill - The Duck Room, 6504 Delmar Blvd., University City, 314-727-4444.

ROCKY MANTIA & THE KILLER COMBO: Fri., Dec. 16, 7 p.m., $15. BB’s Jazz, Blues & Soups, 700 S. Broadway, St. Louis, 314-436-5222.

THE SAINT LOUIS CHAMBER CHORUS: ADVENT TO CHRISTMAS: Sun., Dec. 18, 3 p.m., $10-$40.

Union Avenue Christian Church, 733 N. Union Blvd., St. Louis, 314-361-8844.

SHAWN MULLINS: W/ Larry Campbell & Teresa Williams, Sat., March 25, 8 p.m., $35. Off Broad way, 3509 Lemp Ave., St. Louis, 314-498-6989.

SOPHIE CARPENTER: Thu., Dec. 15, 7:30 p.m., $20. Thu., Dec. 15, 7:30 p.m., $20. Blue Strawberry Showroom & Lounge, 364 N Boyle Ave, St. Louis, 314-256-1745.

THE WILDFLOWERS: A TRIBUTE TO TOM PETTY & THE HEARTBREAKERS: Sat., Jan. 14, 8 p.m., $20$40. The Hawthorn, 2225 Washington Avenue, St. Louis. n

SAVAGE LOVE

Unlocked

BY DAN SAVAGE

Hey Dan: I recently split from a committed, monogamous, extremely long-term relationship. I’m now exploring the dating scene as someone who has never dated online prior to this year. I’m a woman with kids, and I’m not looking for another parent. I want to keep things casual. I haven’t had any boyfriends yet, just a couple of regular dicks. I keep getting pissed at my regular dicks for making me feel like I’m not the most important thing in their lives, which is kind of the whole point of keeping things casual. Do you have any slutting advice?

Divorced And Meeting People

Do I have any slutting advice? Oh, honey. There’s 30 years’ worth of advice for sluts in the archives of Savage Love and the Savage Lovecast. But here’s a little slutty advice just for you …

Casual relationships are still relationships, DAMP. So even if you’re not the most important thing in the life of some man whose dick you’re sitting on regularly — and you know it, and you’re keeping your expectations and demands in check — you shouldn’t be made to feel like the least important thing in his life either. If a guy can’t be considerate, if he can’t be respectful (of your time) and grateful (for your pussy), stop sitting on that dick. Even if the dick is spectacular, DAMP, go find another seat. Because being kind to a sex partner — casual or committed, regular or irregular — is a very low bar, DAMP, and you shouldn’t put up with men who can’t be bothered to clear it.

That said, DAMP, sometimes a person needs a nudge. Some people worry a casual sex partner will mistake kindness for romantic interest and are performatively inconsiderate to avoid confusion (instead of using their words); others have actually had casual sex partners mistake kindness for romantic interest and are overcorrecting (instead of using their words). So if one of your regular dicks is being ungrateful or unkind, use your words. Make it clear to him that you wanna keep things casual but that you expect to be treated with kindness and consideration. Good (or good enough) guys will show you more consideration going forward, DAMP, and guys who aren’t good (or aren’t good enough) will show you their asses — they’ll make no effort to be more considerate — and you shouldn’t put up with (or sit down on) those dicks.

Finally, DAMP, while kindness and consideration are perfectly reasonable expectations where casual sex partners are concerned, endless conversations to process your feelings are not. So I would advise to confide in a trusted friend or two about your frustrations before you confront one of your regular dicks about something that’s bothering you. Are you pissed about something that you, as a casual sex partner, have a right to be pissed about? Or are you pissed about something that you don’t have a right to be pissed about? If he’s flaking on you at the last minute or treating you like a cum dump (no small talk, no aftercare), you have a right to be pissed. Those are things you can confront a dick about. If he hasn’t been able to see you for a while because he’s busy (one of the top reasons people seek casual sex partners) or if he ended things because you wanted to keep things casual and he wanted something serious, you don’t have a right to be pissed about that. Those are things you vent to a friend about.

P.S. Get tested regularly, insist on condoms, make sure these dicks know your kids are your first priority, make sure kids are your first priority, don’t take it personally when a casual sex partner moves on, be the kind of casual sex partner you want to see in the world (be kind and considerate yourself), and when you’re ready for a relationship again, DAMP, don’t rule out guys you’ve been seeing casually.

Hey Dan: I don’t know if you’re watching the second season of The White Lotus, but you’ll get this reference if you are: I’m a married straight woman who recently got herself a personal trainer. My husband cheated on me on and off for the first decade of our marriage. He agreed to see a marriage counselor with me, and he pretended that the cheating was tied to a deep-seated psychological issue. He may have believed that. Our counselor certainly believed it, and for a while I did, too. But the cheating never stopped. It’s been a few years since I’ve had sex with him, but I don’t want to leave him because we have kids, and our relationship is actually pretty loving and low conflict now that we’re not fighting about cheating. (It also helps that I don’t have to worry about getting gonorrhea from him ever again.) The kids need me less these days, so I got a personal trainer about a year ago. I don’t feel guilty or bad about it. But I somehow feel both guilty and bad for not feeling guilty or bad. What is that about?

Abundant Personal Training

First and most importantly, APT, of course I’m watching the second season

of The White Lotus. Mike White is a genius. I can’t wait for the finale, but I never want it to end. (Here’s hoping Cameron and Ethan at least make out before one or both or neither of them dies.) Moving on …

You shouldn’t feel bad about seeking sex elsewhere — excuse me, for seeking personal training elsewhere — but you already know that. And if you’re feeling bad about not feeling bad … well, that’s most likely because sessions with your personal trainer aren’t just about personal training. They’re about that, of course, but they’re also about your marriage. Your marriage isn’t what you expected it would be, APT, and now you aren’t someone you expected to be — you know, the kind of woman who has a personal trainer. So I don’t think you’re feeling guilty and bad for not feeling guilty or bad. I think you’re feeling grief (for what your marriage was supposed to be) and relief (at making peace with your marriage as it is). Enjoy those sessions, APT, you’ve earned them.

Hey Dan: I’ve just started wearing a metal cock cage and want to wear it for longer and longer periods of time. How do men in chastity devices get through airports? Do they think about security? Can’t Ask Google Everything

“No man who wears a chastity device doesn’t think about security lines at airports,” said SeattleLocked, a man who wears a chastity device. “And us guys in chastity pretty much fall into two camps. There are those who do not wish to pull others into their kink, and there are those who do not give a fuck.”

SeattleLocked, who currently falls into the “do not pull others in” camp, has

been into chastity devices and orgasm denial for as long as his dick has been getting hard, but he’s gone through airport security locked and unlocked.

“If you don’t want to pull other guys into your kink, you organize removal before and re-installation after security,” SeattleLocked said. “If you don’t give a fuck, you happily submit to be stripsearched in that weird little booth while smirking at the TSA dudes.”

Basically, CAGE, a locked guy is given the key to his chastity device before he goes through security, slips into a bathroom to remove the device, slips it into the bag he’s taking through security, and then immediately heads to a bathroom after security to lock himself back up — ideally under the close supervision of his keyholder, to make sure he isn’t tempted to rub one out prior to boarding. Now, there’s a good chance a bag containing a male chastity device will wind up being searched after it’s X-rayed, of course, but by this point in time — more than 20 years after the creation of the Transportation Safety Administration — every TSA agent has seen a male chastity device (in a bag, on a dick), heard about them, or worn one. (TSA agents are people, some people are kinky, some kinky people are TSA agents.)

“Modern technology also offers person alized high-tech polycarbonate options, as an alternative to steel or titanium chastity devices,” SeattleLocked said, “and those cages make sailing through security a breeze — if you’re TSA-Pre.”

People who have completed the TSAPrecheck process pass through simple metal detectors, and a plastic or polycarbonate chastity device won’t set off a metal detector. People who haven’t completed the TSA-Precheck process have to go step inside those “full-body scanners,” which are designed to detect any object, metal or otherwise, hidden under a person’s clothing … by creating a digital image of a person’s body sans clothing. So it’s not just locked guys in the don’tgive-a-fuck camp who get strip-searched at the airport. Those guys may be getting literally strip-searched by actual humans in the privacy of a weird little booth, but the rest of us are getting virtually stripsearched by millimeter wave scanners in front of God and everybody else at the airport.

SeattleLocked is on Recon at recon. com/SeattleLocked. (And, no, SeattleLocked is not me, and I am not SeattleLocked, which will be clear when you check out his pics on Recon.)

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If a guy can’t be considerate, if he can’t be respectful (of your time) and grateful (for your pussy), stop sitting on that dick. Even if the dick is spectacular, go find another seat.