I WON THE LOTTERY !

could produce an annual rental income of €10,000 each, but could require yet a further €2 million.

So, for a further €10 million, our friends and family seem to be fairly secure. And we still have €40 million to allocate. This is roughly the net worth of Harry Kane.

stock to make a difference, donations could be made to upfront organisations and individuals directly involved in combating the poaching of rhinos and elephants and the mistreating beasts of burden in various parts of the world. €10 million could make a small but worthwhile difference.

Whoops! We’re down to €100 million. Well, it´s not only children that require surgery or hospital treatment. Perhaps 400 serious cases of adults requiring urgent attention could be located. An additional €20 million could make such a difference. And what about those who do have homes, but are finding it impossible to heat them properly and to eat enough? €30 million could make things easier for 1,000 families or lonely individuals.

We only have €50 million left now, so let’s not forget our friends and family ­ and ourselves!

€6 million would buy six more than reasonable properties, including appropriate furniture and fittings. We can’t forget Uncle Ben and the friend who helped our daughter so much. Another €2 million for various homes and holidays of a lifetime, for several BMWs, sound systems, hobby equipment and first class medical cover and other insurance for those closest to us. And the purchase of eight small flats? This

THE British Benevolent Fund is the charity of last resort ­ it provides financial assistance to those Britons in Spain in dire straits and who have no other recourse. We deal with the worst that life can throw ­ and try with the aid of volunteers to find a solution.

Domestic abuse continues to be a major driver of our cases with women, many in long term relationships taking the step to leave abusive and damaging environments.

One such case involved Anne, a married British lady with four children ­ one day she walked into a police station in her hometown near Malaga and filed a report against her husband of a decade for repeated domestic abuse including multiple physical assaults and rape stretching back many years.

She had endured enoughwhich she had done for the sake of keeping the family together ­ on the day she went to the police the husband had attacked one of the kids ­ that was it. Anne had no money, and no family member could help, but she was determined to protect the children.

There must be so many ideas I have overlooked. Ukraine, Somalia, nurses and carers, the vulnerable victims of fraud and house­bulldozing. I really intend to win one day, so, before the happy announcement, suggestions on a postcard, please. Or, on reflection, let me win it first.

There is one small problem, however. The chance of winning is about one in 140 million ­ about as likely as ‘Lord’ Alan Sugar being crowned Miss Mexico.