Writings to be touched i have been touched touched by god it is easy to feel the touch what you do and how you react to that touch is the key to life ignore it and you will be doomed run away with the feeling and you are going over a cliff the key is to be able to balance that touch keep it and feel it feel the blessing and listen use the touch to find out about yourself and about humanity 5/2012 love is ugly love is not kind it kills it can kill at any point without warning love arises and kills every time love arrives, without exception, at a time in life when peace is all that is desired love never leaves it stays with you and only leaves in order to get a better grip love kills love does not seek to destroy but it is an ugly byproduct love is evil and mocks you love is ugly love tears the heart out of the body and places it in a frame the heart then stays in this frame until it is returned placed back in your body so that it may rejuvenate once it is filled with blood and is again beating you may realize the strength the vigor of the heart lives on to torture not just yourself, but everyone love is ugly i am fortunate to understand love to understand that i have a long way to go i am blessed to be in love i am grateful to be able to love 5/2012 we must reach the end. do we? we need to reach the end how can we? the end will never arrive the problem is clear-nothing ends the beauty is soothing-nothing ends everything fades and intensifies nothing and no person can claim an end we near the end but if you look it is the beginning everything is starting it starts and starts
everything is new and fresh even when love fades it is just the imagination at work we believe love can diminish and may be lost we believe there is an end look up and keep your head up everything lasts for a period of time called “forever” even our memories which we believe become distant only seem to fade even if we try to forget our problems, our worries that is just a way to heal, a way to go on with life as feelings change, as everything changes, we becomes stronger and feelings solidify we do not reach the final stage we do not need to believe in an “end” fading memories intensify when real they return with vigor and an intensity as never before our memories are designed to fade so that we can remember more clearly our clarity becomes evident in true love love seems to fade and we believe it may end love never fades or ends but only grows and starts these are the days of our lives, remember 5/2012 hair hair is the key key to love and happiness a healthy tongue is the key to life teeth love also and, at last, the sweet smile reveals the heart of love add a tongue, smile, teeth, hair and the heart together nothing else could match this equation sweet 05/2012 a sad afternoon with a forced smile this is what i am faced with for now.... this is my life, for now.... i am crying, but happy for you. i am crying, but happy for you. it is a sad afternoon with a forced smile. i am bent over, crushed, but happy for you. i am bent over, crushed, but happy for you. it is a sad afternoon with a forced smile. i am numb, but my heart knows of our love. i am numb, but my heart knows of our love. it is a sad afternoon with a forced smile. i am shattered, but we will remain best friends until death. i am shattered, but we will remain best friends until death. it is a sad afternoon with a forced smile. this is what i am faced with for now.... this is my life, for now.... 4/2012
do you want to belong? why? it is not a question, it is a clear statement in the form of a question stating:do you? if so, please follow orders we don’t like to follow orders so, you don’t belong but i want to not possible you really don’t want to belong if you do, all becomes routine and routine is bordome boredom is death it is admirable to be bored i have never been bored maybe once or twice, but time alone is rare and should be held remember, all that goes through your mind is valid try not to be bored if you are then you are dead so, then, why do we strive to fit in? to be bored? because we are all dead? yes, in a way we are i am not i don’t want to belong 4/2012 just the same just as full and hunger are the same so are love and indifference one does not “hate” one cannot “hate” there is only indifference indifference is the highest level of being don’t hate you can’t, even if you want to all one can to is be indifferent that hurts and it hurts beyond “hate” you can choose to be indifferent but to “hate” is to “hate” yourself i love myself, but i am indifferent i love and i am indifferent what is the difference? right see it is impossible to tell them apart so, choose indifference and love they are the same 4/2012
another day today has broken before it began shattered before sunrise for some, not all the day is new it is not another day, but a continuation of the first take it and use it use the knowledge gained and lost do not lose another day you can go backward real progress is one step back and another forward you are sent back and each day you are sent further back you need to go back you may have the chance to regain your position, although only a few do you can ask me how i do it but you will not understand make backwards your time understand that backward is the only direction that is true do not think of the past, it is done go ahead we are all in a continuing state another day 4/2012 goodbye say goodbye let it flow have fun goodbye goodbye is a happy word, you will see take that feeling and use it put it to work in your heart when done, all is in your heart and all is complete you can only be whole when you say goodbye to everyone say hi saying hi is the same as a goodbye it is liberation is it new, it is freedom freedom so that you can tolerate the feelings inside be with your feelings understand you are content do not look for it, understand and feel it when it comes to you, and it will, smile and enjoy enjoy the ride to goodbye goodbye 3/2012 emotions are all the same use your brain not as a device, this time
use your brain no, not like me, that is not possible think use your brain to figure out a simple situation a simple idea a simple idea a simple problem it is not a problem for yourself it is not complicated it is a simple concept simple think you are not in trouble you are not in trouble relax understand that emotions are all the same happiness, sadness, anger, envy and shame are all the same there is never a difference if you think there is a difference, you are troubled think trouble comes with mixed emotions do not mix emotions there is no need, emotions are all the same as hunger is equal to saturation so guilt is to pride all emotions are the same they are beautiful thoughts beautiful all beautiful and all the same 3/2012 she was difficult to look at but she owned the street it was painful she wasn’t an old lady she wasn’t young overweight by a lot heavy red lipstick bright red who was she trying to show the red to? why leave the house with that red? why leave at all? when you look like that you should stay home stay home and hide in the bathroom, if you fit you have nothing to offer anyone stay there good for her although uneasy in her gate she showed confidence some sort of confidence maybe heart-felt or it could have been a front doesn’t really matter
she tried and she succeeded she went out, red lipstick to impress and she did pathetic and very bold just like every day ugly means a lot, but it doesn’t mean you are out you can still command a presence perhaps command the street but we will never know if it were a true flow of confidence then she owned it all if it were of false pretense, she is and will always be lost in ugly 3/2012 what is a good win-win situation? is there such a situation? what is the difference between win-win and lose-lose there is none i think others like to say win-win to fool themselves they try to make themselves feel better really, all situations are lose-lose if you gain you cannot gain there must be loss if you lose you have not lost everything loosing everything is easy but it is not probable it is very difficult as improbable as getting nothing out of school no learning no insight everything and nothing is a learning experience there is no win-win lose and smile 3/2012 I can’t cry I haven’t even tried I do cry a lot about other people and events i’m not shy nothing wrong with it perhaps it is a defense mechanism perhaps i don’t want to use this mechanism perhaps i have not let go this is why i can’t cry but i have let her go i have felt the loss no, i do not claim to feel total loss there is no such thing as total loss it is impossible it is best this way for now
there is nothing to cry about it was an adult decision but, i can’t cry maybe it is like not being able to cry at a funeral nobody is dead well, in a way, we are both dead to each other, for now i can’t cry over the past, it was great but, people cry over the past when burying a loved one i have buried a loved one, for now maybe forever she has buried me, for now maybe forever my best friend she remains my best friend dead, but still here, for now maybe she is here forever maybe she is gone forever what concerns my is the tears i am too sad to cry it hurts too much too much pain let go and cry i have let go i can’t cry i am afraid to lose everything if i let go and cry but, i have cried, the whole situation is sad i cry inside and that is more sad than tears my heart has cried, cries now and is ready for anything my heart will be happy to united with her heart my heart will be happy if she is far away, but happy she must be happy or i will break love i love her more than life or death it is a beautiful situation that has not come to fruition, yet why am i still hopeful? well, hope is the last to die i will not cry, i do not want to lose everything i do not want to cry there is no reason to cry 3/2012 I Have a Question Question How difficult is it to put the dairy products in order? why does it take seconds (really a lifetime) to figure out the placement of the milk today the milk was in the center yesterday it was to the left of the cream maybe tomorrow it will be to the right of the low-fat milk why? why shouldn’t they always be in 1, 2, 3 order?
Is it too difficult? It is a good question I do not have time to waste just to straighten out the order of the milk even if i can see that the milk is in the center, does that make it right? no because it has taken me time to make that calculation it has taken time to reorder and retrace my steps of yesterday that is not acceptable that is a waste of time perhaps even, if you think about it with an open mind, it is a waste of milk it is not difficult save time, save money, save milk put it in the center or on the right or left but, please, please, please do it the same way every day i understand if the milk is not in the center every day perhaps the low fat milk ran out, thus leaving the milk on the right those things may happen and we should adjust accordingly but, please, please, please try to put the dairy products in order it is not a question, it is a desperate request it is a question that does not have to be a question it is not difficult do not waste my time with this problem please, please please put the milk back where it belongs 3/2012 42 Minutes 42 Minutes of my life is gone did i want it? do i need it? yes 42 minutes for no reason nothing no reason 42 minutes gone i will never get it back if every minute of life is precious, why did they take 42 from me? it is gone and i have nothing to show well, she did have nice hair long brown hair i couldn’t see her face, but she had nice hair was it worth it? worth 42 minutes so that i could see her hair? it is worth considering but, no, 42 minutes are still gone 3/2012 Life is Easy Life is easy, fun matters, life does not
think about it all you have to do is eat be educated make money live in a house (or a tent) maintain professional and personal contacts act your age respect others respect yourself do not chew gum and spit it in your neighbor’s face see, it is easy life is fun fun matters, life does not 3/2012 I saw Her Eyes I looked into her eyes and was full of emotion Her eyes were gold, yellow, red and all the most stunning colors possible she just stared back at me, almost confused In love, but not able to say it She is young She represents youth I don’t know who she is We have a connection A connection with a stranger Just by looking into her eyes She looked back and saw me She was there, but perhaps overcome with emotions She was so excited, she was blank, with a sharp look in her eyes She is beyond emotion 3/2012 I Love Her How do I know I love Her? I know when I don’t have to ask myself if you ask, you don’t love if you doubt, you don’t love when you see each other you know when you see each other every day, you know when you see each other after weeks or months, you know love is known, it is not guessed or hoped for love outlasts dust love buries all all problems, all worries, all ailments love cures doubt love becomes solid when real solid love never breaks it cannot I know I love Her I love Her
I smile so I am sure I love Her no, I am not sure I know to be sure means there may be doubt there is no doubt, I love Her when there is no question of love when you don’t think about love, but feel it, then you love when the question of love becomes a kiss and not a question, you love I have been forever touched by love I love Her 3/2012 Time The time is now time is not possible to experience in the past time is not the future and time does not exist in the present then where are we? no going back and there is no forward where do we go? this moment does not exist it is often talked about, but this moment is now over where do we go where can we go we will find a place we will find time happiness is not related to time the time is now 3/2012 Dismissed I have been dismissed I am an outsider go! so, I am gone you are dismissed ok, and i am supposed to feel..... yes, you are dismissed so, I am gone go and...... so, I am gone final one act, one final act that means so much means so much to me but may not contact the brain of another once you are dismissed, you do not run away walk away at any pace you wish and think there is no excuse no need for an excuse and never one given it is the end
the end of it all the dismissal dismissal of all 3/2012 Who AM I? I have come so far If I speak, I am condemned If I stay silent, I am condemned One need not speak All will come to the patient I see all agony I feel all agony If I speak, I am condemned If I stay silent, I am condemned 2/2012 Hope All hope is not gone Hope cannot burn out Hope may be hard to see, at times Concentrate, you will see it Feel hope Feel hopeful and understand all hope is not gone 2/2012 George Washington He sat there In the dawn light, absorbed in the grass He sat and appreciated the beauty The beauty of nature The beauty of all He seemed calm He said, without knowing, that he gets strength from the quiet He said, without knowing, that he feels refreshed He knew, although it took me a moment, that he was not in peace How could he be? He is at war and the troops need to be ready He needs to be prepared to battle I figured out that he is calm I figured out that he is on edge Ready, he is always ready And that is why he won the battle, as I understand it 2/2012 Love Must Meet Love must meet, it cannot be forced It is not a game One cannot run after love, you will go in the wrong direction One cannot chase and expect to tackle love
Love cannot run Love cannot expect love to run Love runs towards love They both must run to each other in order to love Love must meet Beauty must arrive I cannot go after it How can I? There is no such thing as running after beauty If beauty shall go, I will weep, I bleed, I do not run If you run you will get lost You will lose Beauty is natural As clean and fresh as the clearest pure water Run after beauty and fall You will fail How then? Well, think Beauty attracts beauty Beautiful books are on the shelf with other beautiful books A beautiful work of art is not alone A painting should not be alone, but it must not run If it runs, the beauty washes away If it runs towards or away, it is the same Run forward and slip Run away and you are gone How then? How does it work? I can tell you, I know I think I know I bleed, so I know Unite Beauty is only beautiful if the meeting is in the middle If two paintings hang in a gallery correctly, they are a beautiful couple If they hang askew, they will not be considered They must meet in the middle, they cannot lean one way or another Meeting, this is the way of beauty Run to the center, not the ends Meet in the center and the entire book shelf stands like no other It stands, is admired and is absolute beauty Absolute pure love Love meets in the middle 2/2012 Watch Stupid Watch them watch themselves Watch them chew Watch them try to relax Watch Wait and watch
You will learn Watch and learn everything Everything Listen Listen to the loud, the quiet, the ugly and the stupid You learn a lot from stupid Stupid is the best teacher Everyone is stupid and so everyone can teach Few can learn I love the stupid, I love knowledge 2/2012 Wait Everyone has to wait Well, we should wait Some of us can wait Some of us don’t want to wait They should Should they? It’s up to them If they can wait, that is great Maybe they can’t wait Should they wait? If they can Can I? Yes I can wait Because I want to wait Patience is a virtue that is prized and valued By whom? Me Wait, if you can If you can wait Tomorrow is really today Tomorrow doesn’t exist, but today is here It does not take much patience to wait I’ll wait, I can It’s tomorrow 2/2012 MINNEAPOLIS Old, Old Man or woman? He tries to light his cigarette, but he is too far away. He tries again and this time it is a bit too close but it works. Old, Old, & yellow. He walks away. I sit, thinking. 5/1998
NEIGHBORHOOD He walks his dog every day at 830 am. Damn nice guy with damn thick black glasses. Doesn't bother anyone except that he looks so strange. Maybe it is because his dog walks him-he spins around his dog not the other way around. Is this part of his problem? He can`t read, can`t really see. It is my problem, not his at all. He's happy. Maybe I should dance around my dog. 7/1999 RELATIVE ANGER AND RELATIVE PAIN RELATIVE ANGER AND RELATIVE PAIN GO TOGETHER WE DON'T NEED IT DON'T PUSH IT SO HARD LET IT COME UP DON'T HIT IT DON'T LEAVE IT ON DON'T OVERCROWD OR THE MECHANISM WILL FAIL IT IS PRETTY HARD TO FACE HEAD ON WHAT ARE THE ALTERNATIVES? NONE, BUT RELATIVE PAIN AND RELATIVE ANGER 7/1999 SKIPPING She is young. Not really. She likes to skip down the street with her little brother. He is little and skips like a girl-nothing wrong with that. She is too old and tall, acting and skipping like a girl nothing wrong there. I think. 8/1993 SPAGHETTI He coughed spaghetti. How could he cough spaghetti? How could he not cough spaghetti? Who cares if he coughed spaghetti? It is OK, these things are normal. It is the spaghetti that is a bother. It is the spaghetti you are concerned about. Don`t be concerned, it is spaghetti. Don`t be concerned, it is only normal. 8/1993 Teach Teach, Please, teach You get it? Of course you do, but teach. Teach, so learn, teach.
Never me. Never again. Teach, teach. 2/1986 Shits Them shits fit I’m taking those, bro they ain't even out yet them yo size? It don't matter them bitches are hot oh my god i'm 11 1\2 i'll wear 2 pairs of socks i'm gonna show them they'll know did you get 'em? Corse 7/1999 Where Where you goin' to go? I don't know You don't need nothing for the train? I can't sit all day. Maybe I can. Shelter doesn't open till 8. They don't care about us. I'm 29 years old. I just put this on 3 days ago. I'm just trying to tell you I'll help you. Where are we Brian? Larry, you made my day today, brother. 7/1999 Things are as they seem Things have to be as they seem They are not But what else would or could they be? Is it for you to ask or answer? Yes, it is. But how to answer and why? The point is not to question but to know the answer. This is not possible. 2/1986 Patience Patience is love Love waits Patience and love wait forever
Who are we to hurry love To hurry patience Love waits Love is patient August 2009 Strive Strive, strive, getting close. Close enough. Relax. Go forward quickly, grab it. Let it go, it's like paper, it does bend and lose it's shape, let it go. Strive never to let it go. It will vanish, strive or lose it's shape. 8/2009 Don't push it You're giving it all away. By pushing you hand it over-pushing it all away. Keep it, hold on to it. Don't hold too tight or you will push it all away. Don't let it go, hold it with a firm hand and an iron will the will to let it all go and not push it. To push just means it is all wrong, all true all mistaken. You just push to make things more comfortable. Think. Think, comfort is achieved by letting things go, letting loved ones go. By letting go one can hold on forever. 8/2009 Love Again Anew It is time for love again, love for a new time, love for now a new love although not one that just happened everyday is new every love is new a new day with you is a new love everyday starts a new life of love 11/2010 Love Love is not easy to understand It is not easy to portray In movies, books, film, t.v. And especially in real life Love is not for the weak To give your heart is to give in the deepest fashion To receive is not for the weak Yet, the weak need love The weak allow true love to be passed on to the strong The weak enable love-make it possible The strong carry love The noble generate love True lovers cultivate love that has been generated and passed unto them 11/2010 We are alone We are not alone We are born alone We eat alone We dance alone We are alone alone We are always together 11/2010
Bright Future We have a bright future One full of love and joy Filled until we are content We are content Content until forever We are You are content forever? Impossible! Yes. Why do you ask? I'm sorry you must ask and cannot just smile. 12/2010 Help! And it is there Help! It is arriving Help me! Help me! Help us It is we that aid us 12/2010 Everyone lives Mostly Everyone goes on Goes onTo achieve To prosper Attaining self-worth Self-gain Self-respect I have done so I will do so Everyone lives to be content with themselves and thus together Alone I can conquer nothing We rise to all heights together 12/2012 What does it mean What does it mean When you concentrate on one When you feel one When you do feel all When you feel one 12/2010 Far? Gone, but not far Not far Thousands and thousands of miles
A different country A different life Not far Gone, but not far 12/2010 Do Not Do not lay back Nothing comes to you Do not wait We do not have time to wait Grab it Wait, your time will come soon Very soon Do not wait Act or have life run over you, have it pass by and you are gone Do not wait Be patient and you will be happy 12/2010 Light Use the light use it forget what some indicators are, what they say forget what the temperature is use the light use it to forge the road ahead it is not an easy road and needs light so, use it 12/10 Forget Did you forget You could not have Unless you wanted to Did you forget yes why yes Did you forget on purpose I don't understand the question I don't understand you 12/10 Hold on Do not hold on too tightly-you will lose Do not grab or strain your arm Do not let go and risk it all let the wind decide wait, that is not advisable
the wind will decide except we blow the wind hold on tight, we will win keep blowing 12/10 Is it true? Is it true that they are all the same? Yes Why do you say that? Because I know Because you know what? That they are all the same I believe that you believe that, but how can they all be the same They are You have not given me anything-no proof, no examples, no explanation Why should I? They are all the same Well, if they were all the same, then what is the point? There is none You prove that nothing is the same 12/10 I got it I got it all the time I am afraid of it Usually not Sometimes Sometimes not at all I got it He says so with his chin up and a half smile on his face I got it 12/10 I get it Happiness is not real It does exist, just not in the "HAPPY" way we happily understand It exists in only small things, not large In the little moments, not the big ones Are we then only happy for a short time? Or for a small time? No, the times you may miss are the happy times They last forever Do not miss them Pick the right glass for your friend, for your loved one-you know what they drink and how These are not little things, they are the longest lasting priceless moments that allow us to savor real happiness Until death, get it? 12/10
After What happens after? No, not death! That's easy! It's over! What happens after After this Well, as with death, we will never know 12/10 A continuation Today is just a continuation of yesterday So what does it mean? You can't get away from it You can't forget or you are doomed But we do forget We are doomed 12/10 Why Why is it that I am so confused? I could not be any more rational And objectively, I am rational To a point I can put up with a lot Maybe I don't know what to tolerate? How could I be rational and have such an irrational question hanging over me? So, why am I so confusedI make myself confused Confused in a rational way So, am I confused? 12/10 Yell WhoYellWhoMeYellMeMe 12/10 I will wait I will wait until I die I will wait until something happens What will happen? I will wait I will wait until I die Until something happens Until then, there is nothing Nothing to wait for but something to die for 12/10 Nobody It is nobody Nobody but myself We are together
I am by myself We are close I am by myself We are friends I am by myself I am comfortable I am confused There is nobody There are a lot of people that are very close People that are inside of me There is nobody Nobody but myself 12/10 Open Up To open is human not everyone can open not everyone has the chance bleed bleeding is part of life beautiful but painful painful, so you must be careful blood will flow with the pain it's beautiful open up! 11/2008 I Killed Myself I killed Myself It took 8 years, but I did it. Hope I can still come out of it alive. Killed, but still alive, I hope. I hope. We'll see, dead or alive, it's up to me. Come back. Take the knife out, tape your wrists, put the bullet back in the drawer, put the pills down-all 372 of them-bandage your throat and mouth and come back to the living dead. 11/2008 Friends They don't ask. Friends don't ask. Friends don't comment. They care. Friends care. They don't ask. They ask you how you are. They comment on your well being. Friends do not ask-ever. 11/2008
Early Early came too late. The day passed and it was late. Early can't be early, it has to be late. From dark morning came dark night-quickly as it is late. Never before have I felt so satisfied to be late. 10/2008 Just numb Time went by, numb. All went away, just numb. All numb. Sit and stare, numb. All alone with me, numb. Together, numb. All by myself together, numb. Just our hearts, numb. Time, numb. 11/2008 Suffer How do I say it-or not say it? Do I blurt it out and test it? No-I shall be firm and suffer. 7/1984 Trouble Walking through the cool forest-with the crisp sound of the wind streaming through the ripe trees. Along comes troubleA familiar problemA known womanWe all know who it is. 7/1984 Waiting Sitting waiting for something to happen. Don't! Watching t.v. is for useless-worthless people. 7/1984 Just Don’t Don't push it. Don't lay way back. Don't smoke. Don't drink. Don't talk with your mouth full. Then do what? Take out the garbage. 7/1984
Be Silent one by one demanding fast, useless, not patient not this not that, etc. We all know this too too well, but be silent. 7/1984 What? What's this? What's that? I want to knowI want to knowTell meFuck you. 7/1984 Think Reading backthey're all true shouldn't we have more respect and stop thinking of ourselvesLooking for attention. 7/1984 Happy? Is he happy? He can't be-but he must. Why stay on. BITCH. Jump on him. Stay back! 7/1984 Goodness Straight from the lip. Stern, good, hard. It's good for you. Is it good for you? 6/1997 Problems Order, ready, all set-no problem. No problem-yes always a problem. No problem. 6/1997 Say Hello Say hello in a loud voice. Don't worry, they won't hurt you. They can't hurt you.
Your fear is almost enough to laugh at. But, it is not. Just as a bigger flower shop might open, you can only invite the shop in and say hello. You cannot wish it away and try to fight it. Say hello. Don't worry, be confident in yourself and stop straightening your tie too much. Smile and say hello. 11/2008 Nothing will help A blue hat will not help Wearing that hat does not make you a better person. It does not give you anything or aid your personality. Do not believe in the hat. Do not believe in that blue hat. Believe in yourself. Try. Just try. Do not hide. Try. Fail, but try. Do not hide behind that hat. 11/2008 Important? Putting an extra desk in your office does not make you important. Putting up a nice print from West Africa doesn't make you important, either. Evan if you change the configuration of your desk or your rug-that does not make you important. If you feel important for those reasons it is ok, but you must really be bored, not important. 10/2008 Laugh Be careful when you laugh, it is one of the most dangerous of actions. Laugh and you may end up dead. The dead laugh-they laugh out loud. And clear enough for all of us to hear and learn. Learn not to laugh. It can only kill. It has the ability to kill and it will. Always will always does. So laugh if you must but know that it is best to laugh inside-deep down. Deep down we laugh and live. Live out your laughter and feel it. Experience the laughter that comes from within. Don't let it kill you. 11/2008 Beyond numb What comes after numbness. Death. Death is around the corner of those that are beyond numb. Numb is positive and negative. It can kill, it can help or hurt. Beyond that it will only kill. A death we all try to avoid because it happens after the numbness. After numbness we die. Happy and sad death. Overly numb death, but death. Death does not come from being too numb, although it can. I don't understand anything beyond numb. Beyond the numbness we all feel. We search, we try to understand the numbness but we always fail. We fail because we are beyond numb. 11/2008 Waiting Is waiting like lying? Doesn't have to be-but most of the time it is. When we wait, it is for an accident, for the hunt or for lack of a drill. Waiting is lying. Lie to everyone and what happens? You wait-you wait to lie. You wait while you think you are alive. You lie, you die-you wait till death. 1/2008 Help
If I need you, I need no help-if I need you, I need nobody. I need nobody except for someone to help. Help me not need-not need someone to care-to help. I need all the help I can get. How to get help when I need it is the only way. The only way to get help is not to care. Don't care. Don't care and help will arrive, it will always be there. 11/2008 Stare Stare at me to see me. Stare and dissolve me. Make me go away with a quick stare. With one, you can kill, maim, make me or abuse me. It is the care-the caring-that is lacking. Stare to care, not to maim or abuse. Abuse and stare. Abuse and stare-it is the same. 11/2008 Is It Possible? Is it possible? Maybe. Not probable. You go and get full of grief. You go and release the grief. Then you come back to the grief-all on your own. Nobody instructs you to see out grief. You don't realize or you do realize-but you go back. So, is it possible? Maybe, but not probable. 01/2010 Grief You do not seek out grief. It comes to you. You run from it-normal. You run back to it-normal. There is no winning. You realize you cannot win. Run from it and you lose. Go towards it and say hello. Good bye. 01/2010 Alone Sit, stare, be alone. Being alone. Be strong, feel strong, feel alone. Feel alone all the time. Feel alone amongst others-especially alone while in company. Feel alone at times of happiness, madness and sorrow. Always be alone. Feel alone.
Be alone with your loved ones. Be alone. Be alone and feel alone and all will be fulfilled. Filled. Alone. All alone. Alone. Together. Strong all together alone. 11/2008 "One Day" You can't live it all in one day. One day. One day is too short, too short a time. Too short. One must live throughout the day. Throughout the day, all takes place-all happens-in one day. It happens slowly through the long day. It happens. But remember, always remember, you cannot live in one day. 11/2008 Today Today it happened It did not just happen today It happened today It happened again today Again and again it happens It did not happen today it just feels that way 6/2011 Love Love is in the air and in the broad sky It will always be Love is now, it is here Love cannot be destroyed, yet, only can shift along to another place A strong and healthy place full of green Green, open, clear and full of light Love is light You are my light 6/2011 Smile Don't tell me when to smile Smile when you want to and it feels good Don't force it Don't let people tell you how to move your own face Smile when comfortable, content or in love Don't tell me when to smile, it has to be natural or you can see how it is forced and painful A pain nobody can feel but yourself
A pain that is near death Don't smile or you could die, you could injure yourself Take good care and think, then smile 6/2011 Laugh Why does a laugh mean nothing? If you laugh for different reasons, doesn't meaning disappear? Do people laugh only at funny things? Do they laugh because they are nervous or shy? Why do they laugh? It makes no sense They laugh to make fun of you Laughing is nothing 6/2011 Wait Wait Waiting Wait Wait for what? Forget it Forget waiting Forget what? 6/2011 To Me Think of me Me To me Think Think about how we are About what we are Will become About me Me To me 6/2011 Stop Stop to think about why Stop to wonder why Think why Think about it Think about stopping How do I think? How do I stop? Stop 6/2011 About
About it What about it? Think about it? Feel it If you can If you can feel it, then you don’t need to think about it Think about it If you need If need be 6/2011 Believe To believe is the greatest gift To believe is beyond human Believe what? Believe in what? Believe who? Believe in who? It matters not what you believe or who you believe in Believe 6/2011 People People fall People fail People want People don’t want to fail or fall People want people to fail and fall Some people want an even ground Some people believe in fairness Some people believe in people Not many Nobody I know 6/2011 True love can never fade True love can never fade It often changes and is tested But never fades True Love grows like fire With the spark that started the two Love itself does not exist It cannot It often falters Love is not an emotion in itself, but a wish With "Lovers" lost in why True lovers question and challenge love On through good and bad On to break the difficult To enjoy the sweet True love never fails
True love is in the heart, it is not a wish True lovers realize they are blessed 7/2011 Love is a Smile Have you ever loved? No Have I? Wrong question Do you Love? Yes How do you know? It is a long process, but you will know Have you ever fallen out of love? No I have fallen out of like There are many I like There are but a few I Love I have never fallen out of Love I Love those who have put me on this earth I Love one other You can’t fall from Love Love is in us in the air and within two people If you Loved you still Love That is true Love When you realize there is no loss When you realize there is a benefit A benefit for one or both to go on Let them go and you will see You will grow and you will see the other grow That is Love One must be free to leave in order to return One may leave and never return, that is ok One may leave and return, that is ok Let them go but keep them in your heart Respect your heart and Love Love and the bird may fly home The Rainbow Lorikeet may fly away, but that is to a high place Respect the Lorikeet Lorikeets return home sometimes Only that Love is real Only that Love is in perpetuity Love is a smile that never fades You have heard, “I wish you the best” Love is when you mean what you say Not many people say what they mean Love makes you speak and write the caring you have in your heart When you Love, strange things happen Good and bad things happen, this is life Love is life, not a story
Life changes Some may move, that is fine Some move further, that is fine Some become one again, this is fine Love is winning Love is a smile 1/2012 Help Help I don’t need help Who needs help? I don’t Help Can’t Can’t help when there is nothing or nobody to help Even if and when there is help-there is nobody to help Even if and when help arrives-who would it be for? There is no help, there is nobody who needs help, but help is needed? Yes 1/2012 Where Are They From? Where Are They From? I don’t know them I don’t want to know those kind of people People? Yes, there are alive Alive, but do they think? Maybe, we can never know Have you met them before? Yes, that is why I do not want to be here Be here wondering why they are here Be here trying to think about nothing but... Then they appear All over the place, they appear Just at the wrong time, they show up It used to be a surprise, a shock, but now it is laughable How to believe they would do that Why would they arrive? They don’t think They can’t They are not human You can smell and taste the fear inside of them They are not real I am real, where am I from? 1/2012 Pain There is a lot of pain in comfort
There is a lot of comfort in pain Pain and comfort go together as one They go together as friends Also as enemies They go together It hurts, the pain Does the pain hurt or does the comfort hurt? Either way through comfort and to gain comfort To feel pain and feel comfort Feel comfort in the pain or the pain in the comfort It is all the same Pain 1/2012 It Hurts Pain hurts It hurts for a reason For a good reason Pain warns us of evil Evil done unto us? Evil we have done unto others? Same inside Evil is pain Feeling pain is being alive Pain rejects evil Pain helps the blood thicken Smile when it hurts 1/2012 Forget Forget How could I forget? I tried I try and I can’t Why try? There is no reason to try If you tried and you failed to forget then you didn’t try Don’t try Forget Don’t forget to never forget 1/2012 Laugh I try to laugh, but it isn’t real See me try, I did it, but it isn’t real I can laugh, I prefer to laugh, I like to laugh It is not real Smile, relax, open and enjoy It is real, just laugh 1/2012
Nothing It all begins with nothing It all ends the same With nothing There is nothing in between Can you consider that something? No Nothing Nothing? Don’t need to think about it Can’t think about it There is nothing there Nothing 1 /2012 Dark light Why is everything dark? Dark? Yes It is It is dark Void Painful and painless All at the same time Painful and painless Dark light 1 /2012 A SATURDAY AFTERNOON IN NY He is shaking uncontrollably Hands twisting every which way It is strange to see Rocking back & forth on the train Isn`t the train ride rough enough? 8/1998 AGAIN Again I have not learned I understand, but I have not learned It is not my fault I know I will never learn I lived through it and swore it away It is back and I asked for it I know I will never learn Nobody can learn Again 8/1998 AM I VIOLENT?
AM I VIOLENT? WHY? AM I VIOLENT? WHY? I JUST WANT TO KNOW? DO YOU HAVE A CIGARETTE? DO YOU EAT THAT? DO YOU DO THAT EVERY DAY? AM I VIOLENT? WHY? 2/1986 Bim On the head-bim On the leg-bim Hair, ass, chest, etc, etc, bim bim Beach, pool, ball, table-bim. Bim, bim, bimmm.... 7/1988 DEAD Waiting to die Not waiting, but dying Not dying, waiting Dead 6/1998 DELTA FLIGHT Nothing is more important than the health of everyone. If I walk in front of you, is it a problem? If you lose your temper for no reason, does it matter at all? Do not have a breakdown, let Me push, let yourself pass. 4/1998 DINNER Reaching up It is a sign of ending hope Actually, it is only dinner, I try to brush it off and try not to care about him. But for him it is not dinner at all-it is perhaps his final hour. 6/1998 Don't Ask Don't ask me why, I will never know Love knows Love knows all Love knows G-d, time and distance Love knows the reasons Don't ask me, ask Love Ask, but you will never know Ask, but you will feel a fool
Ask, and show all that troubles you Ask, and see all that is wrong 11/2008 Don't ask again Nothing is wrong Don't ask, again nothing is or has ever been broken, don't ask Ask Love Trust Love Trust all Trust all you feel We are nothing but how we feel Don't ask, feel until you have no more questions, no more to know 11/2008 EAGER I am eager I am eager to go to be there I am eager to stay & be here But I am not eager 11/2008 FALAFEL SHOP He was just sitting there-looked pathetic. It wasn't his fault. He was just eating and trying to mind his own business. Then the other was there in the Falafel Shop. He looked comfortable and content. Was he? Was I? 2/1998 Going Through The Motions Going through the motions. Why do we go through the motions? Aren't we smarter than that? Still we go through the motions. The motions. We carry on, carrying through with the motions. We carry through with the emotions. Do we know better? Still we carry on with the motions. I like her, she likes me. Still; the motions. The motions. 7/1988 GREY I Love Grey Not White Perfect Not Black Perfect
Not the middle Grey Battle Ships are grey Grey 5/98 I CAME FOR THEM I came for them. I came to see them. Do they care? Do they have to? I think they know, but they are so humble and so huge at the same time. I came for them and me? 5/1998 I KNOW YOU, DON'T I? A. I KNOW YOU, DON'T I? B. IT'S POSSIBLE. A. WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? B. DO I KNOW YOU? A. MAYBE. B. HAVE YOU EVER SEEN ME HERE BEFORE? A. I MIGHT HAVE. B. YOU DON'T REMEMBER? A. I'M NOT SURE. B. WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO THEN? A. ABOUT WHAT? B. ABOUT THIS. A. MY NAME IS 'STUPID' B. I KNOW. 2/1986 Fat People I think only fat people really care if their tie is straight. Why is that? 6/1999 IT'S JUST A CHICKEN PLACE KISS MY ASS HE SAID HOW COULD HE SAY SUCH A THING MAYBE BECAUSE IT'S JUST A CHICKEN PLACE DID YOU TELL MY EMPLOYEE TO KISS YOUR ASS? WELL YOU CAN'T ORDER HERE ANYMORE DON'T THEY KNOW IT'S JUST A CHICKEN PLACE 6/1999 IT WAS LATE It was late at night so I do not know why there were two men together trying to figure out the best place to buy figs. "Figs are best in Food Town" he said to his mate. Then what were they doing in this store so late at night?
Maybe that is why he had such a long white beard and short shorts, because it was late at night. It all came together when I checked out with my cereal and 1% milk. "Do you like donuts" she asked the man next to him. He did not seem to speak English so I have no idea why she asked this question. Maybe she was talking to me. I was too tired to deal with the two men and such a question. It was too late at night. 6/1999 LOOK Look up. They are not all out there trying to get you. Good for you looking up. Look, they got you. 5/1998 LUNCH TIME He comes in late He eats lunch way too early, he says. He is pissed. I am more pissed. 6/1999 MAN, THAT WAS TERRIBLE Just like any other nice day, but man, was that terrible small room, nothing bad, but man, was that terrible hair on her face, not bad, but man, was that terrible so proud of her space, not a big deal, but man, was that terrible the hair was just in the wrong place and she did not know it, but man, was that terrible the room and the hair are just symbols of her present condition that is so ordinary it could frighten any man, it was sad. 6/1999