Developing Intuition

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'Circular Paths'™ Latitude 41.83N and Longitude 71.41W Developing Intuition Training Course Resolutions are ideas that motivate us, but if we have unconscious feelings that constantly sabotage our goals, our resolutions fall by the wayside after a while.

Resolutions do not bring about lasting change. They come up against our old, often unconscious stories about what we deserve out of life.

To create real change, you have to change the story.

“It is not enough to win a war; it is more important to organize the peace.” ― Aristotle

We all want chances at new beginnings, and every year we take steps to make changes in our lives. But first we have to know what we want out of life so we can find the right, positive story that will get us there. So let me ask you, "What will make you happy?" That's one of the questions this Full Moon in Cancer brings up.

Are you living your destiny? Do you have a purpose?

Are you being creative? Do you have an idea that you think our culture needs right now? These goals are just as valid as planning to go to the gym or loose weight, get healthy or fall in love. In fact, these goals are more important than ever before. We are living in a time of conscious evolution--we've played out an old way of being that no longer serves humanity or nature and we must consciously choose to live differently.

What gifts are you ready to share with the world? Do you have the energy and faith and inspiration to do it? If you want to 'tune-up' your Self--body, mind and spirit--my developing intuition training course is geared to do that. Starting this month with the root chakra, the energy-holder for our security needs, our survival, our grounded-ness, our sexuality and our hidden anger, rage and fear at life, we'll use your natal Saturn from your astrology chart to see what grounds you into this life, what your story of life is, how you've dealt with it thus far, what doesn't work for you anymore and why, and what new story is waiting to be born.

This developing intuition training course focuses mostly on inner awareness - the cornerstone to intuition. As we listen more closely and turn up the volume of inner guidance, we open doors to creativity. We can find solutions and make wise decisions more easily. A part of you knows the way and knows the answers. Discover how to unlock this wise inner guide.

Please don’t rely on external sources for answers – always your most trust-worthy source are the messages from your soul. I urge you to be discerning about all information and trust your intuition the messages from your soul wherein all universal knowledge and truth abides... Learn how to TRUST yourself. INTUI-SPEAK When you order our developing intuition course, you will also receive extra support emails over 30 days. These emails with tips and inspiration will assist you to pay regular attention to your intuitive voice. AND we answer all of your emails.

Build your own higher awareness and intuition. Download your own copy of our "Developing Intuition Course" and start your personal support emails today.

Intuition Development Workbook Here's what our intuition development workbook offers you: • Our Five Senses, "Extra" Senses, and Intuition • What Blocks Intuition?

• Awareness Exercises • Intuition Tools • The 6 A's to Enhance Awareness and Intuition • Lessons from the I Ching - helps you understand and bridge the dualities of life the positives and negatives, the higher road and the lower road.

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Describe both personality and soul and how to bring them together in full, genuine expression.

Support you in grounding spirituality in your everyday living.

Awaken you to your authentic self.

Open the door to new levels of freedom, power and contentment

Many traditional approaches to developing intuition, like astrology, the I Ching and Tarot connect with archetypes. Evolution molds life to respond to recurring situations.

The I Ching is a catalog of recurring life patterns. It can strengthen our awareness and sensitivity to the archetypal patterns that intuition recognizes. With a better conscious understanding we know more about what to make of these patterns and we can better focus our intuition.

'Circular Paths' Developing Strategic Intuition & Creativity ™ Latitude 41.83N and Longitude 71.41W I’m kind of an interesting hybrid between an artist and an entrepreneur.

In these turbulent times we artisan entrepreneurs bring beauty, honor, compassion, love and partnership to the table as we cooperate with others in our communities. All my life I’ve been an artisan. Along the way to becoming a successful entrepreneur, I learned an important lesson – the reason I’m here today.

Do you understand what motivates you?

Are you living by your own values, or by others?

Let go of what you no longer need. Hold onto beauty, truth, love and light and you will come out the other side of this transformation intact... and whole. Don't stay in your head – it's time to look at the deeper emotions you usually ignore. Look beyond yourself, weigh yourself in the cosmic balance, own up to your faults without guilt, and bring yourself into balance.

Naomi Klein's The Shock Doctrine: the Rise of Disaster Capitalism points out that these shocks to the financial system are being used to manipulate us, as big corporations and governments have done in the past. We have to make sure that we know ourselves well enough to not to be fooled or manipulated by any person or idea – it takes away our freedom of choice.

This most basic right of freedom is what America really stands for – freedom to think for ourselves; to make our own choices and even make our own mistakes. It’s the same gift we receive from Spirit – free will. Don't you think this is the time and place to bring it all together; to grow into full human beings and live out the founding principles of America?

The Cosmic Story going on up in the heavens mirrors what’s going on here below – as above, so below. Saturn, the energy of conservation, of conservatism, of the status quo, of rigidity and the Old is coming into range of its opposition to Uranus, the energy of awakening, of revolution, of sudden change and the New. They were exactly opposite each other on Election morning. The Old vs. the New: does it sound familiar?

The opposition of two planets is always an energetic gateway for awareness of the issues they both symbolize. On one hand, we are being given the opportunity to wake up to what we really believe in – our values, our dreams for our life, our dreams for the world and for our loved ones. This is not about asking for more for ourselves. This is about asking for the courage to grow up and take responsibility for our life and the world's.

On the other hand, we get to look at how we let our unconscious habits, our control issues, our negative self-image, our need for an illusionary perfection, stop us from being of service to others and to our ideals. We let the pace and the heavy financial and ecological burdens of our modern culture overwhelm our need to live in a healthy, balanced, secure way. But these next few years will demand that we take ourselves and our lives seriously and pay attention to the world we live in. We are all in this together.

Cultivate higher awareness and spiritual understanding as you handle life authentically, powerfully and compassionately. Have faith, manage your time, create art, and stay mentally balanced.

Introduction

Throw everything away, forget about it all! You are learning too much, remembering too much, trying too hard… Relax a little bit, give life a chance to flow its own way, unassisted by your mind and effort. Stop directing the river’s flow.

John (who is fictitious) works for a Downcity company and spends approximately 25 minutes commuting each way to his workplace each day. What we know about John from his colleagues is, ‘he isn’t renowned for being an early office worker or even someone who is on time.” Overtime this lateness has impacted his colleague’s experience of him, his career and his effectiveness as a leader.

When asked about his lateness, John’s believes that he gives himself enough time to get to the office, after all he leaves the same time every day and the traffic is pretty much the same each day and it will delay him even if he leaves earlier. Additionally John feels he is not responsible for the traffic, or being late to work or meetings and that he is, “the victim of circumstances”.

No awareness of a belief For John the reality of not being responsible for his circumstances seems true, and yet at the same time he is unconscious that he holds a belief that “he is the victim of circumstances”, whether true or not. Beliefs are very subtle, behind every word and

sentence that we speak, resides a belief that drive our behavior. As a successful entrepreneur you may have discovered how behavior doesn’t drive behavior, it is our beliefs and values (or, our identity beliefs) that drive our behavior.

For example: I believe that truthfulness, authenticity and compassion to be my highest three values I’ve been able to achieve. Holding these identity beliefs to be true, I’m guided in my behavior in choosing pathways to search these identity beliefs out; these same identity beliefs guide me in how I interact with others in what I say.

Three common identity belief peccadilloes committed by accidental saboteurs: 1. Relentless negativity. The next time you're having lunch in a restaurant; listen in on the conversations at nearby tables. Chances are, you'll hear people griping about their workloads, difficult clients, annoying coworkers, or the ridiculousness of corporate policy. Everyone does it, but if they realized how harmful it is to their company, perhaps they'd think twice. The solution is to hone the fine art of managing up.

Managing up means positioning your people, products, or company in a positive light; hardwire the technique into your corporate leadership practices. Managing up doesn't just happen; you have to make it happen in a systematic way. Help employees understand what can happen when negativity is allowed to breed—good people quit and customers leave—and they'll be more likely to stop doing it.

2. Creeping we/they-ism. Most leaders inadvertently foster what he calls the "we/they" phenomenon—as in, "Well, Rick, I fought for your pay raise but you know Human Resources makes those decisions"—which has a divisive effect on company culture. This is rarely a deliberate choice but rather the natural fallback position of someone who hasn't had formal leadership training. (After all, you don't want Rick to be mad at you, right?) Problem is, you're sabotaging your own culture.

"Instead of blaming HR in the above example, a leader might say, 'When I talked to Denise over in HR, she pointed out that health insurance premiums have risen 23 percent over the past year so pay increases must be postponed. The company is working really hard to maintain the best possible coverage for all of us.” See the difference? You're managing up HR and, simultaneously, you're positioning the company as a united entity."

3. Giving low performers a pass. Let's say your employee Carol consistently gets "headaches" every other (non-payday) Friday and spends more time cheerily chatting up coworkers than she does working. Others will notice—and they will be resentful. But worse than merely causing contention in the ranks, turning a blind eye to the "Carols" in your organization squelches profitability. Why? Because middle performers get pulled down to the low performer level, while high performers either a) disengage or b) leave.

This is a sin of omission, not commission, whose remedy involves implementing a structured series of high-middle-low performer conversations. It's easier not to confront low performers, and trust me; a leader can find a thousand other things to do instead.

But until you move them either up or out, your company will never advance beyond short-term gains. The low performer is an anchor holding everyone else back.

Recognize anyone you know in these examples? Heck, recognize yourself? Don't despair. Work on stopping (or at least minimizing) these three offenses inside your company and you'll be amazed at the improvement you'll see. It's not easy to change these acts of subtle sabotage because they are natural to some extent. After all, it's human to want to vent your frustration. It's human to avoid conflict. That's why these three sins are so prevalent in the business world. But change is possible. And the results feel so good that you're motivated to keep working toward excellence. And it's that ongoing will to improve—combined with the right hardwired behaviors—that creates a high-performance organization."

Where to Start “Getting started can be very hard for people who have trouble with beginnings.

After all, where do we begin? Where do beginnings begin?” - Dorothy Bryant.

Most of us have trouble getting started at one time or another. It's a common phenomenon whether the project is baking cookies, an annual report, or cleaning the attic we often feel - “I just don't know where to begin.”

It’s a good rule to begin with ourselves, in the moment that is. Start the project where we are now.

The other things that are necessary details from the past and plans for the future will reveal themselves as the project takes shape. Sometimes we will begin, like writers, by talking about how hard it is to be getting started. This seems to orally grease the wheels; they start to turn. And before we know it, we've begun… even if we may have to throw away the first paragraph.

Trying to begin at the beginning is a good way to drive myself mad.

I will grasp the tools that are at hand: myself and the moment.

THE MYSTERIES OF THE MIND My research has uncovered that the part of our minds that manages higher conscious reasoning of our values is called the neo cortex. When we are unaware of our beliefs and values we are far more likely to leave our behavior up to our limbic and cerebellum minds to respond to circumstances, and respond in a fight and flight manner, or simply to seek out comfort and pleasure to drive our motivations.

Being aware of our beliefs and values and using our higher conscious mind, we may still seek out comfort and pleasure or responded to dangers when needed as a specific choice; the key difference is that we are able to evaluate circumstances with greater conscious choice and thus have more meaningful impact on the world around us.

Doing nothing is essential for thinking to occur. Many of the most important thoughts are unintentional—they can be neither solicited nor cajoled but have a rhythm of their own, creeping up, arriving, and leaving when we least expect them. It is important to cultivate the lassitude of mind that clears a place for the arrival of what cannot be anticipated. Idleness allows time for the mind to wander to places never before imagined and to return transformed.

“What is a belief?”

A belief is simply belief, a nominalization of experiences, created through repetition and similarity of the perception of our experiences, once we have experienced something in much the same way repeatedly. When we come across them, we deem these experiences will outcome in the same way, and thus create a belief that we hold to be true.

For example you may believe that the earth will continue to rotate tomorrow in such a way that the sun will appear to rise and set. Now why do you believe this?

Partly I assume like me because the years of experience you’ve had that this occurrence happens every 24 hours, and secondly you’ve probably never NOT experienced this, unless you have been to the north or south poles I’ve been told. Get the idea?

ASIDE:[The English translation of “I Believe” comes from Latin and Germanic meaning: I (my identity) Be- (to embody) lieve (Germanic meaning Gentle), which roughly translates into: “Take gently the embodying of your experiences to your identity”.

The Greek translation of “Believe” is “Pisteuo”, which means to receive information into one’s mind, accept it as being true or not, and have enough confidence to act or be willing to act upon your truth. It’s clear that the classical Greeks understood the true meaning of belief and the sensitivity that it brings to literalizing our experiences.]

“How are beliefs formed?”

Surprisingly a belief is formed by only 5 plus or minus 2 experiences, i.e. you have an experience of a situation, then again, and again…. And so on for 5 plus or minus 2 experiences, and then you start to believe it’s true or not, this is referred to as a nominalized experience.

Nominalization refers to when we transform a verb or adverb into a noun, a static entity or object, when we make our experience and our belief become synonymous and true to each other.

Once you start to realize how we create beliefs… you soon realize that once you hold a belief, you will manifest your behavior accordingly into making the belief true for you. [I.E. you filter for experiences to make it true and behave accordingly to make it true, even when it is something we don’t want.] This is called a distortion or generalization of our experience, as in the example with our buddy, the Fictitious John.

Dancing on the Knife Edge of Belief [Small Beliefs; Big Beliefs] I call this next concept, “Dancing on the Knife Edge of Belief.” Hopefully by now you are starting to grasp that beliefs are neither true or not – our small beliefs and our big beliefs; they are simply nominalized experiences that we have, that we filter through our experiences to make true.

The opposite of this is also true while we are filtering for our beliefs to be true, we are deleting experiences from when they are not true.

An alternative to helping us to become more grounded with our experiences and so being able to notice those times when our beliefs are either true or not is by using a powerful metaphor of a knife edge.

Imagine holding a knife out in front of you; be careful in your imagination to point it away from you and not at someone else. Imagination is a powerful thing. Imagine the blade is facing upwards, and that either side of its edge are a metaphor as to which way a belief is true for you.

For example, on one side of the knife edge John believed that he is the victim of circumstance; the traffic is going to delay him irrelevant of his choices or actions, notice what outcomes and what he attracts as a leader from this frame of mind?

Now switch your attention to the alternative side of the knife edge, here John could believe that he is responsible for his circumstances, and for his actions and choices, notice how the outcomes would be different for him and what he would attract as a leader.

As you can appreciate this second belief is far more serving to him than the first.

Making the choice about your belief’s while holding them gently is the key to serving you.

All that is necessary to awaken to yourself as the radiant emptiness of spirit is to stop seeking something more or better or different, and to turn your attention inward to the “authentic self” that you are.

How Storytelling Helps You Sell

Michael Bosworth - If you’ve been in sales for more than a week or two, you’ve undoubtedly heard of Mike Bosworth. He’s the author of two huge and highly influential best-selling books in the sales training field: Solution Selling and Customer-Centric Selling.

Mike has recently gone through a major transformation in how he trains people to sell — an approach that I honestly believe can help most sales pros to sell more quickly and easily. Recently I read a conversation between Mike and Geoffrey James in BNET News, and here are the high points of that conversation: •

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At a basic level, the top reps are selling more intuitively. They have a better sense of the customer and are better able to connect with the customer’s emotions about purchasing. More specifically, it turns out that they were able to achieve this level of rapport largely through a skill that not only wasn’t taught in sales training, but which has been largely ignored in the business world: storytelling.

GJ: Storytelling? You mean like fairy tales?

MB: Actually, you’re not far from wrong. For most of the 190,000 years that humans have been alive on this earth, they’ve learned their most important information, including survival skills, culture, religion, etc., through stories. The human brain, in fact, is wired specifically so that stories, and storytelling, have a much stronger emotional impact than information that’s presented quantitatively or according to some other emotionless structure.

GJ: Is this a right brain/left brain thing?

MB: Correct. As you probably remember, neuroscience tells us that the left side of brain is always looking for a right or wrong answer it doesn’t tolerate shades of gray. It tends to be analytical, linear and skeptical and emotionally neutral. It also tends gets “paralysis by analysis” because it can never get enough information to make what it feels will be an entirely correct decision. By contrast, the right side is creative and imaginative. The ‘big picture’ right side interacts with the feeling power of the limbic or emotional brain. The emotional brain is where the ‘aha’ moments happen. Where the “I want that” or “I need that” feelings happen. The buyer has “gut reaction” and an image that allows them to make an emotional decision, such as the decision to trust someone or buy something. They can feel it and see it rather than quantifying.

GJ: How do stories relate to this?

MB: Stories appeal immediately to the right side of the brain. As soon as somebody hears “once upon a time…” or “I’d like to tell you a story about the time…”, the listener relaxes and knows that no decisions need to be made immediately, but instead all that’s needed is to go along for the ride and listen for what might be important in the future. When it IS time to make a decision, the right side of the brain (which actually makes the decision) draws upon the stories it’s heard in order to judge whether or not a decision makes sense. The story can actually engulf the listener and the teller. The connection during the story can remain between the two people after the story is over, leaving the top sales reps with a connection that others can’t achieve.

GJ: That doesn’t sound much like the typical sales presentation.

MB: No, it doesn’t. Unfortunately, the corporate world tends to get left brain thinkers to create PowerPoint presentations that are intended to provide left brain information to the left brain thinkers. So you end up with these incredibly

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long sales cycles, with committees and endless analyses because, even though people make emotional decisions, they’re trying to find a way to make a decision logically. This isn’t to say that left brain information isn’t useful; but it doesn’t drive buying behavior unless framed in a story that makes sense to the right brain.

GJ: What do sales pros need to become great storytellers?

MB: Great question. First, they need to respect their own storytelling ability. I’ve found that most sales professionals are much better at telling stories from their personal lives - the sort of anecdote you tell to your friends and family - than they are at telling stories from their business lives. People tend to be more relaxed when relating personal anecdotes, but then get all formal and stilted when they tell business stories. So the first step is to learn to adopt the same style of storytelling in business that you use in your personal life. Top sales reps are always naturally good at this. Top sales reps are also willing to share themselves as humans not supermen. Buyers are human and so many sales people feel they have to be ‘perfect’. That isn’t reality, and top sales people sense that.

GJ: What else?

MB: Secondly, sales pros need to be great story listeners. This is important because customers, being human, are also going to be telling you stories - about their career, their company, their motivations, goals, desires, and so forth. Since their story is likely to be hidden between the lines of the normal left brain chatter, it takes listening skills and some intuition to extract the real stories that lie behind the “facts.” It’s a little like watching a foreign film, where you can read the subtitles, but most of what’s important comes from the expressions, body language, tonality, and so forth, of the people on the screen.

GJ: Then you feed that story back to the prospect?

MB: Exactly. You use your storytelling ability to retell the customer’s story, and then confirm - by asking - whether you’ve actually got the story right. Then, and only then, are you ready to sell, because then you can retell the customer story with a different ending or a new sequel, with your offering playing a role in the story. It’s also useful to have a quiver of “here’s how I’ve helped other people” stories, so that you can help the prospect visualize a future that includes you and your offering.

GJ: But do people have time to listen to long stories?

MB: One of the skills that I’m teaching is the ability to build a 30 second version, a 3 minute version, and a 10 minute version of your stories. This requires deciding what’s essential about the story, and what’s an optional anecdote, side plot, or detail. It’s really a matter of adapting the story to the circumstances, whether it’s a formal presentation or just an informal conversation at a social gathering.

GJ: Thanks for the great conversation, Mike.

Visceral Reactions When something's visceral, you feel it in your guts. A visceral feeling is intuitive — there might not be a rational explanation, but you feel that you know what's best, like your visceral reaction against nails on a chalk board.

Your hatred of mice may not be rational, but it is visceral, and every time you see one, you feel like you're going to faint. And when you had to decide whether you were going to stay in Florida or move to Texas, even though you had a good job in Orlando you had a visceral feeling that Texas would be the right choice . . . and it turned out you were meant to be a rancher! Visceral can also mean “relating to the viscera,” with viscera being your organs.

PRIMARY MEANINGS OF: visceral 1 adj relating to or affecting the viscera 2 adj obtained through intuition rather than from reasoning or observation FULL DEFINITIONS OF: visceral 1 adj relating to or affecting the viscera “visceral bleeding” Synonyms: splanchnic 2 adj obtained through intuition rather than from reasoning or observation Synonyms: intuitive, nonrational illogical, unlogical lacking in correct logical relation

Becoming Complacent There will be times when even a belief that is serving, can become non-serving i.e. when we become too complacent in making it a truth.

For example: Our world believed for many years that there was an abundance of fossils fuels on our planet, during this time; our behavior was to create more vehicles, create more power, heat larger homes and cook using fossils fuels, create more objects, create more power, burn more fuel et cetera.

Holding this belief we became complacent and over dependant on believing that there would be more and more available fossil fuel to source. While oil prices increased the reserves around the have world have diminished and our global environment has been impacted.

On one hand this belief has served us, as it helped develop a more global world, it broke down borders, created world trade, it enabled us to design and manufacture innovative products that have improved lives immeasurably, and it has extended our awareness of the universe.

In the same hand, holding this belief also has held us back, from investing in research, developing other means of cleaner energy, creating non dependant fossil fuel vehicles, created nation feuds, impacted our planets ecology and more importantly holding this belief as being a truth has made us complacent, asleep.

Alfred Korzybski’s quote says it all. He lived from 1879 – 1950; he was the founder of the discipline called general semantics and he once said: “There are two ways to slide easily through life: to believe everything or to doubt everything. Both ways save us from thinking.” Alfred Korzybski A Third Way Although requiring greater conscious effort to maintain, imagine standing on the blade of the knife edge, notice that with each experience you have, being unattached to whether what you experience is a truth or not, this will enable you as a leader to open your awareness to even greater choices and thus enable you to respond in ways that will greatly impact and benefit those you serve and lead around you.

When we take conscious choice to stand on the knife edge of our beliefs and remain open to our experiences, we experience so much more, as our filtering of experience receive circumstances of when it is true and not, not that it is true or not.

Remember a belief is just a belief; it’s a normalized set of experiences, you have the choice to believe whether it is the only truth, even what I’m saying to you.

An Inquiry I want to give you an Inquiry to think and embody: What one thing can you do today to cultivate and allow into your experience any alternatives to what you believe and hold true?

ASK: Am I willing to risk who I am today for a chance to be what I want to become?

Notice what you’ll experience from this growing awareness, being in the “now” while taking time to breath and create compassion for yourself for any judgments that may come up for you that might arise in standing on the blade of the knife edge.

Depth of their Keel One of the simplest measures of a leader is the depth of their keel.

In this sailing metaphor a keel is an extended ridge that runs the underneath the length of the belly of a sailing ship. The depth of a keel is what allows a ship to progress smoothly in a direction towards its pre-determined outcome.

Without a keel a ship under sail would skitter across the surface of the water like a leaf being blown across the surface of a pond, at the mercy of the wind.

It is because of a ships keel that it can do two things: 1. It can stay a true course despite constant pressure from the wind.

2. It can change its direction and move counter to prevailing winds.

• How this trait translates into a leadership is when we measure a person’s ability to effectively direct themselves and others towards a common goal during times of turmoil.

• Can a leader create a culture of trust during a merger or acquisition or a culture of abundance during economic difficulties.

In both of these examples, the winds of doubt takes the form of naysayers and skeptics, offering to leadership, their opinions and analysis of a better or safer course that may take the ship onto a reef or even worse to the bottom of the ocean.

Having a deep and even keel keeps the goal insight while navigating rough waters.

Another way to use this metaphor is that in both ship and humans, a deep keel allows one to weather storms well. Gusts of wind and opinion, rain and scrutiny pull at sails set for a predetermined course.

Without depth of keel, this journey can become harrowing, threatening. With a deep keel beneath, this journey becomes, powerful, intense and an opportunity to willingly grow and deepen in our leadership skills.

“For there are two reasons why human beings face danger calmly: they may have no experience of it, or they may have means to deal with it: thus when in danger at sea people may feel confident about what will happen either because they have no experience of bad weather, or because their experience gives them the means of dealing with it.” ― Aristotle, the Rhetoric & the Poetics of Aristotle The metaphor of a deep keel is one that can be taught simply and effectively.

Individuals who possess a deep keel are literally difficult to push over.

It is an amazing thing to see a smaller person sitting tall and effort free, mentally simulating the experience of having a deep keel, while a much larger opponent strains, struggles and to push them over.

Training in this manner creates a learned experience that directly translates into applicable leadership skills. Leaders who possess deep keels exude a calm assurance to all those around them and most of all that they are able to navigate their ship with stewardship to safer waters.

More than ever before, having the right mindset and tools is key to financial success.

While the markets continue to be volatile and the global economy is affected by the economic crisis in the United States, many people are rubbing their hands together with anticipation and excitement at the opportunities available to them. More than ever before, having the right mindset and tools is key to financial success. While the markets continue to be volatile and the global economy is affected by the economic crisis in the United States, many people are rubbing their hands together with anticipation and excitement at the opportunities available to them.

Abundance made possible by human togetherness and cooperation.

Once again the theme is to know what really fulfills your desires so you will want to share it with others. The more modest your desires (simplify your life) the more happiness you'll find.

In the midst of chaos, a re-balancing. A new start.

"There is only one journey. Going inside yourself." -- Rainer Maria Rilke Life is a spiritual journey. When we look at it that way, we can finally begin to make sense of our world. We can understand why we suffer and how we can ease our suffering. And we can at last allow ourselves to experience the love, joy and peace that are our birthright.

Sages through all time have advised, "Know thyself." The spiritual growth journey is one of getting to know and experience who we really are: spirit in form.

“And of course, the brain is not responsible for any of the sensations at all. The correct view is that the seat and source of sensation is the region of the heart.” ― Aristotle Spiritual growth begins to make sense when we realize we have both a personality and a soul. While our personality identifies with limitation, our soul knows itself to be limitless.

Our challenge is to bring the personality and soul together in harmony.

Learning Strategies: Can the Conscious Teach the Unconscious?

Accepting the principles that we have: 1. a conscious intellect which we feel that we control 2. an intelligent unconsciousness: as well as the running of things we know how to do (get dressed/ clean teeth/ drive car), increasingly it is seen as the place where our creativity/ intuition and problem-solving resides. This is believed to operate independently of conscious control (even though we may think we’re consciously controlling…)

I wonder whether with practice we can improve our ability to call on or apply our intelligent unconscious in whatever direction will be of use to us?

I think that simple approaches of consciously thinking about an issue or question without coming to a conclusion or answer, and then allowing thoughts to percolate or marinade over night is recognized as an effective strategy.

But what about training the conscious mind to use unconscious resources by habitually and routinely consciously and mentally debating unconscious issues?

Is it possible to grey the border between the black of conscious awareness and the white of unconscious resources (creativity/ problem-solving) by having unconscious characteristics and behavior as your subject matter of focus?

So far I can’t find any writing on this matter, so is a good experiment to question those practioners/ passionate about the relationship between the conscious and other-thanconscious about their views on their own learning?

One of the greatest gifts human beings possess is an immense capacity for learning and it is our philosophy at the Intuitive Arts Guild that exploring how we learn and finding new ways to enhance that ability and constantly kindle it in young and old, regardless of capability, is a sacred and ceaseless undertaking.

What I’ve done by combining these two extremes of INTUITIONALISM and CREATIVISM is to recognize the necessity of these two elements working together in order to obtain optimum outcome in the learning process. It is not a matter of either intuition or creative experience as a stand alone doctrine; but rather a willingness to cautiously take action on the basis of intuitive thought; and then to objectively assess the creative experiential outcome. This should lead to future intuitive confidence that has been based on a proper interpretation of what was perceived to be a directive thought of intuition.

If you’re like me, you love transformational learning—the kind of direct, experiential learning that really changes your life. Please take a moment now to explore this powerful new resource for transformation Creative Thinking Exercises will give you more enjoyable options in life!

Never be stuck without a solution again. One creative thinking exercise alone will triple your creativity. Be your own think tank.

Unlock your creative thinking!

When we least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or in saying that we are not yet ready. The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back. A week is more than enough time for us to decide whether or not to accept our destiny.

Creative thinking is not a gift you have to be born with. Most creative people learn how to be creative. They initially do it logically. They look at one perspective and think of another. They appreciate metaphors. They make cross-connections easily. They trigger their thinking one way and then apply it to the problem at hand. Our exercises and processes will help you do that.

For example, creativity comes with:

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seeing things differently, seeing different things, generating multiple options, breaking the rules, thinking and linking, a high level of awareness, knowing how you think, playing 'what ifs,' and trying something on for size.

Enhancing your creative thinking is a big step towards becoming more aware of how your mind works. Your mind is very powerful. And you can be its master.

Creativity is a challenge. It is a purpose to improve and simplify.

• Creativity is courage. The world needs more fearless people that can influence all disciplines to challenge their very existence.

• Creativity is reflection aimed not at yourself, but at the world around you.

• Creativity is an approach to the world to solve a problem.

• Creativity is a way to influence, to get the world behind you with new fresh thinking.

• Creativity gets noticed, and all those who copy only copy because they noticed.

• Creativity is original thinking, not just thinking, but real thinking. Thinking that is hard, and doesn’t come easy.

• Creativity is being imaginative yet realistic.

• Creativity is a capacity to understand the difficult.

• Creativity is a sudden inspiration. music sends coherent information to living cells, causes blood to oxygenate, blood cells to achieve higher order of information, immune system to enhance concomitant with opening altered states of consciousness, energy enhance, achieving higher

creativity, intuition, opening to subconscious qualifications.

Is the Glass Half Empty?

“Water does not resist. Water flows. When you plunge your hand into it, all you feel is a caress. Water is not a solid wall, it will not stop you. But water always goes where it wants to go, and nothing in the end can stand against it. Water is patient. Dripping water wears away a stone. Remember that, my child. Remember you are half water. If you can’t go through an obstacle, go around it. Water does.” ~ Margaret Atwood, The Penelopiad Water has always held energies of healing and change for me. It cleanses, nurtures and empowers. Today’s oracle is all about using water to tune in to your own deeper soul wisdom.

Is your soul parched? Do you need more of water’s healing presence in your life?

Over the next week, pay attention to water wherever it shows up. The water that comes out of the taps in your home, the water you drink, having a shower or bath, going for a swim or soaking your feet, rain falling, and bodies of water such as rivers, lagoons, lakes and oceans. See what water whispers to you. Pay attention to what it shows you, and how it makes you feel.

Instructions for using today’s post Scroll down through the following water images and then let yourself come back to the one you are most drawn to.

When you have chosen your image scroll further down for your message; designed to help you embrace current opportunities.

Trust that you will be shown what you most need to know right now.

Love and Light,

How Big Is the Brain?

Question: How Big Is the Brain?

Answer: The human brain is an astonishing organ, capable of surprising feats of memory, susceptible to damage, and yet remarkably adaptable to change. Just how big is the brain? While the human brain might be compared to the form and appearance of a walnut and has a structure similar to that of other mammals, what makes it so very different is its size in relation to body size. Compared to the size of our bodies, human beings have much larger brains than many other mammals.

The Size of the Brain • • • • • • •

In terms of weight, the average adult human brain weighs in at 1300 to 1400 grams, or around 3 pounds.

In terms of length, the average brain is around 15 centimeters long - we generally accept 15 cm as about 6 inches.

For comparison, a newborn human baby's brain weighs approximately 350 to 400 grams, or three-quarters of a pound.

Men tend to have bigger brains than women. After taking overall body weight into account, men's brains tend to be approximately 100 grams larger than women's.

In women, parts of the frontal lobe and limbic cortex (areas associated with problemsolving and emotional regulation, tend to be larger than those of men.

In men, the parietal cortex (associated with the perception of space) and amygdala (linked to social and sexual behavior) tend to be larger than those in women.

Neurons are the structures that serve as building blocks of the brain and nervous system.

They transmit and carry information, allowing different parts of the brain to communicate with one another as well as allowing the brain to communicate with different parts of the body. Researchers estimate that there are around 100 billion neurons in the human brain.

Does Brain Size Matter?

Obviously not all people have exactly the same size brain. Some are larger, some are smaller. You might find yourself wondering if brain size might be linked to characteristics such as disability or intelligence. Researchers have found that in some cases brain size can be linked to certain diseases or developmental conditions. For example, autistic children tend to have bigger brains (and earlier disproportionate brain growth) than non-autistic children. The hippocampus tends to be smaller in elderly adults suffering from Alzheimer's disease. This area of the brain is strongly associated with memory.

What about intelligence? The answer to that question depends largely upon who you ask.

According to one large-scale study by Michael McDaniel of Virginia Commonwealth University, bigger brains were correlated with higher intelligence. Not all researchers necessarily agree with McDaniel's conclusions. Such studies also raise important questions about how we define and measure intelligence, whether we should account for relative body size when making such correlations, and what parts of the brain we should be looking at.

It is also important to note that when looking at individual differences among people, brain size variations are relatively small. Other factors that may influence or play a pivotal role include the density of neurons inside the brain, social and cultural factors, and other structural differences inside the brain.

10 Quick Facts About the Brain There are still many mysteries about the human brain, but researchers have uncovered a number of interesting facts about how the brain works.

Here are ten quick facts to get you started on the path to a better understanding of the brain.

1. The average adult human brain weights approximately 3 pounds.

2. The human brain is composed of approximately 75 percent water.

3. The average weight of a newborn human infant brain is about 350 to 400 grams.

4. Recent estimates suggest that the average adult brain contains approximately 86 billion neurons.

5. Only about 10 percent of the brain is made up of neurons; the other 90 percent is mostly composed of glial cells. Glial cells perform a range of functions, including acting as a "glue" to hold neurons together. They also perform housekeeping functions by cleaning up excess neurotransmitters and supporting synaptic growth.

6. The brain continues to form new connections between neurons throughout life.

Old beliefs suggested that the brain was fairly set in stone early in life, but neuroscientists now know that the brain never stops changing.

7. Among children and adults between the ages of 1 and 44, traumatic brain injury is the leading cause of disability and death.

8. The most common causes of traumatic brain injury include falls, motor vehicles crashes, and assaults.

9. The average size of the human brain has decreased by about 9 cubic inches over the past 5,000 years.

10. The brain uses a lot of energy.

While it represents only about 2 percent of the body's total weight, it requires about 20 percent of the body's oxygen and 25 percent of the body's glucose.

The 10 percent of brain myth "You know, you're only using 10 percent of your brain. Just imagine what you could accomplish if you used the other 90 percent!"

Chances are high that you have heard someone make a similar comment at some time or another. The popularly and widely spread belief that we only use or have access to 10 percent of our brain's power is often used to speculate about the extent of human abilities if only we could utilize our brain's full capacity.

In reality, the 10 percent claim is 100 percent myth. You use all of your brain. The only instances where there are unused regions of the brain are those in which brain damage or disease has destroyed certain regions.

The Origins of the Myth Researchers suggest that this popular urban legend has existed since at least the early 1900s. It may have been influenced by people misunderstanding or misinterpreting neurological research. The 10 percent myth may have emerged from the writings of

psychologist and philosopher William James. In his 1908 book, The Energies of Men, he wrote, "We are making use of only a small part of our possible mental and physical resources."

The myth has perpetuated much like other urban legends. Movies depict characters capable of remarkable feats when the supposedly unused 90 percent of their brains are "unlocked." Well-intentioned people such as motivational speakers or teachers often cite the 10 percent myth as a way to demonstrate that all people should strive to live up to their full potential.

Unfortunately, less well-meaning people have also used the myth to promote and sell products and services that they claim will unlock your brain's hidden abilities.

Debunking the 10 Percent Myth Neuroscientists point out a number of reasons why the 10 percent myth is false: • Brain imaging scans clearly show that almost all regions of the brain are active during even fairly routine tasks such as talking, walking, and listening to music.

• If the 10 percent myth were true, people who suffer brain damage as the result of an accident or stroke would probably not notice any real effect. In reality, there isn't a single area of the brain that can be damaged without resulting in some sort of consequence.

• We would not have evolved such large brains if we were only using a tiny portion of them.

• The brain uses approximately 20 percent of the body's energy. It would make little evolutionary sense to have such a large portion of our energy resources utilized by such a tiny amount of the brain.

• Brain mapping research has yet to find any region of the brain that does not serve a function. "Numerous types of brain imaging studies show that no area of the brain is completely silent or inactive," wrote Dr. Rachel C. Vreeman and Dr. Aaron E. Carroll in a study of medical myths. "Detailed probing of the brain has failed to identify the 'non-functioning' 90 percent."

Unfortunately, the 10 percent myth remains both popular and persistent. It has been repeated in popular culture in everything from advertisements to television programs to Hollywood blockbusters such as the 2014 film Lucy starring Scarlett Johansson and Morgan Freeman.

The next time you hear someone claim that we only use 10 percent of our brains, you'll be able to explain why this statement is not true. Not to say that human beings don't have amazing potential – we just use 100 percent of our brains to accomplish these remarkable feats.

Left Brain vs Right Brain Understanding the Myth of Left Brain and Right Brain Dominance Given the popularity of the idea of "right brained" and "left brained" thinkers, it might surprise you to learn that this idea is little more than a myth. Have you ever heard people say that they tend to be more of a right-brain or left-brain thinker? From books to television programs, you've probably heard the phrase mentioned numerous times or perhaps you've even taken an online test to determine which type best describes you. Given the popularity of the idea of "right brained" and "left brained" thinkers, it might surprise you learn that this idea is just one of many myths about the brain.

What Is Left Brain - Right Brain Theory?

According to the theory of left-brain or right-brain dominance, each side of the brain controls different types of thinking. Additionally, people are said to prefer one type of thinking over the other. For example, a person who is "left-brained" is often said to be more logical, analytical, and objective. A person who is "right-brained" is said to be more intuitive, thoughtful, and subjective.

In psychology, the theory is based on the lateralization of brain function. So does one side of the brain control specific functions? Are people either left-brained or right-brained? Like many popular psychology myths, this one grew out of observations of the human brain that were then dramatically distorted and exaggerated. The ‘right brain-left brain theory’ originated in the work of Roger W. Sperry, who was awarded the Nobel Prize in 1981. While studying the effects of epilepsy, Sperry discovered that cutting the corpus callosum (the structure that connects the two hemispheres of the brain) could reduce or eliminate seizures.

However, these patients also experienced other symptoms after the communication pathway between the two sides of the brain was cut. For example, many split-brain patients found themselves unable to name objects that were processed by the right side of the brain but were able to name objects that were processed by the left-side of the brain. Based on this information, Sperry suggested that language was controlled by the left-side of the brain.

Later research has shown that the brain is not nearly as dichotomous as once thought. For example, recent research has shown that abilities in subjects such as math are strongest when both halves of the brain work together. Today, neuroscientists know that the two sides of the brain collaborate to perform a broad variety of tasks and that the two hemispheres communicate through the corpus callosum.

"No matter how lateralized the brain can get, though, the two sides still work together," science writer Carl Zimmer explained in an article for Discover magazine. "The pop psychology notion of a left brain and a right brain doesn’t capture their intimate working relationship.

The left hemisphere specializes in picking out the sounds that form words and working out the syntax of the phrase, for example, but it does not have a monopoly on language processing.

The right hemisphere is more sensitive to the emotional features of language, tuning-in to the slow rhythms of speech that carry intonation and stress."

In one study by researchers at the University of Utah, more 1,000 participants had their brains analyzed in order to determine if they preferred using one side over the other. The study revealed that while activity was sometimes higher in certain critical regions, both sides of the brain were essentially equal in their activity on average. “It’s absolutely true that some brain functions occur in one or the other side of the brain. Language tends to be on the left, attention more on the right. But people don’t tend to have a stronger left- or right-sided brain network. It seems to be determined more connection by connection," explained the study's lead author Dr. Jeff Anderson.

While the idea of right brain / left brain thinkers has been debunked, its popularity persists. So what exactly did this theory suggest?

The Right Brain According to the left-brain, right-brain dominance theory, the right side of the brain is best at expressive and creative tasks. Some of the abilities popularly associated with the right side of the brain include: • Recognizing faces • Expressing emotions • Music • Reading emotions • Color • Images • Intuition • Creativity

The Left Brain The left-side of the brain is considered to be adept at tasks that involve logic, language, and analytical thinking. The left-brain is described as being better at: • Language • Logic • Critical thinking • Numbers • Reasoning

So Why Do People Still Talk About Right-Brain, Left-Brain Theory?

Researchers have demonstrated that right-brain/left-brain theory is a myth, yet its popularity persists. Why? Unfortunately, many people are likely unaware that the theory is outdated.

Today, students might continue to learn about the theory as a point of historical interest - to understand how our ideas about how the brain works have evolved and changed over time as researchers have learned more about how the brain operates. While over-generalized and overstated by popular psychology and self-help texts, understanding your strengths and weaknesses in certain areas can help you develop better ways to learn and study. For example, students who have a difficult time following verbal instructions (often cited as a right-brain characteristic) might benefit from writing down directions and developing better organizational skills. The important thing to remember if you take one of the many left brain/right brain quizzes that you will likely encounter online is that they are entirely for fun and you shouldn't place much stock in your results.

What Is Problem-Solving?

Problem-solving is a mental process that involves discovering, analyzing and solving problems. The ultimate goal of problem-solving is to overcome obstacles and find a solution that best resolves the issue. The best strategy for solving a problem depends largely on the unique situation. In some cases, people are better off learning everything they can about the issue and then using factual knowledge to come up with a solution.

In other instances, creativity and insight are the best options.

The Steps in Problem-Solving In order to correctly solve a problem, it is important to follow a series of steps. Many researchers refer to this as the problem-solving cycle, which includes developing strategies and organizing knowledge.

While this cycle is portrayed sequentially, people rarely follow a rigid series of steps to find a solution. Instead, we often skip steps or even go back through steps multiple times until the desired solution is reached.

1. Identifying the Problem: While it may seem like an obvious step, identifying the problem is

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not always as simple as it sounds. In some cases, people might mistakenly identify the wrong source of a problem, which will make attempts to solve it inefficient or even useless.

Defining the Problem: After the problem has been identified, it is important to fully define the problem so that it can be solved.

Forming a Strategy: The next step is to develop a strategy to solve the problem.

The approach used will vary depending upon the situation and the individual's unique preferences.

1. Organizing Information: Before coming up with a solution, we need to first organize the available information. What do we know about the problem? What do we not know?

The more information that is available, the better prepared we will be to come up with an accurate solution.

2. Allocating Resources: Of course, we don't always have unlimited money, time, and other resources to solve a problem. Before you begin to solve a problem, you need to determine how high priority it is. If it is an important problem, it is probably worth allocating more resources to solving it. If, however, it is a fairly unimportant problem, then you do not want to spend too much of your available resources into coming up with a solution.

3. Monitoring Progress: Effective problem-solvers tend to monitor their progress as they work towards a solution. If they are not making good progress toward reaching their goal, they will reevaluate their approach or look for new strategies.

4. Evaluating the Results: After a solution has been reached, it is important to evaluate the results to determine if it is the best possible solution to the problem. This evaluation might be immediate, such as checking the results of a math problem to ensure the answer is correct, or it can be delayed, such as evaluating the success of a therapy program after several months of treatment.

Thinking inside the box We often hear people talking about “thinking outside of the box.” Usually what is meant by this metaphorical box is the boundaries defined by some line of thought. The “be different” theme is an interesting one in business, mainly because everyone wants you to think “outside the box”. It’s been 20 years folks: I think we are all outside the box now, so get more creative. By exploring new possibilities different from the previous ways of approaching something, whether it be a business or artistic pursuit, we hope to leap past the confines of the old ways using a novel approach. Without people pushing through the boxes of convention, society would stagnate and we would never have the pioneers and leaders to inspire us and drive us to improvement. We recognize Gandhi, Einstein, Martin Luther King, Amelia Earhart, and Bruce Lee as pioneers who have made their mark in the world; their excellence came about from their willingness to push past and eventually redefine the “box.”

The ability to think outside the box is a valuable skill and is requisite for improvements.

However, that doesn’t mean that thinking inside the box is useless or even undesirable.

The framework of the existing boxes have their own values. Previous established frameworks are often in place for good reason: they work. The human mind is very good at finding structure in things and working from within developed structures. Even without a previous framework in place, we will try to establish an underlying structure to achieve understanding. Currently existing boxes can provide a prebuilt framework to serve as a launching point to facilitate the process of understanding. Using pre-existing boxes saves you the time and effort of building your own model of understanding, and possibly even saves you the unnecessary effort of duplicating existing frameworks. The conventional boxes can get you up to speed faster, particularly in pursuits that require being able to do things (for example, computer programming, painting, or even writing).

Though the box is often depicted as a constraining structure, the box paradoxically often empowers creativity and the ability to change. With no reference framework, our perceptions of the task at hand consist mostly of unknowns. With so many things unknown, we become uncertain, tentative, and possibly frozen into inaction. It is here where working inside the framework of the box becomes most valuable. The box provides a model which either explains the unknowns or defines a course of action to break the cycle of uncertainty and inaction. The box framework provides the starting point for exploration, and it is from this process of exploration that creativity and change can arise. You can hand a child paints and brushes, but the child probably

won’t become the next Picasso without some framework for learning how to use the paints.

It is the exploration of the box that eventually leads to the recognition of the limits of the box. Being able to think outside of the box requires that we know what inside and outside the box actually mean. Thinking “outside” of the box is meaningless without the context of understanding what defines the box; understanding the box and being able to work from within the box gives us a starting point to learn to recognize and perceive the box. Recognition of the box is the first step needed to move beyond the box and push outside of it.

While we may ultimately wish to break through the confines of the box and become one of the innovators thinking outside of the box, we cannot completely discount the value of thinking “inside” the box. Thinking inside of the box complements the ability to move beyond the box. As long as we can learn not to be confined by the box, we can find value thinking both inside and outside the box.

Thinking Outside the Box Creativity and the Business Brain – Your position of responsibility give you the stress of deadlines, targets and deliverables. The development of your people, your management responsibilities and your career development weigh heavily on you.

Continuing professional development, business/ competitor intelligence and your near-term product and service evolution/ development nag away at the peripheries of your to-do list and stress consciousness.

The environment in which you and your business is operating, the competitive threats and the strategic developments that you should be plotting and planning in response seem like things that are always on next week or month’s agenda.

The reality – when you make the time – is that your day to day responsibilities drown your brain space and creativity. Like digging a hole in the sand on the shoreline, as quickly as you try and dig out the brain space, the sea water of your hard deadlines, actions and targets fills the hole. Even if you adopt a disciplined approach to your time you often get to the allotted slot for your creativity and…….. nothing…… you’re not in a creative place or mindset, nothing flows. Or even if it does, it’s a long time coming and you’re vaguely aware afterwards that there was a lot more to come if only you’d been in the right mindset.

If you’re practiced at being creative, inventive, innovative and lateral then you’ll recognize the mind set you need. You’ll know what state you need to be in to originally

produce and generate new thought or ideas. You may only know this hazily through a series of post-event analyses of your most creative moments. Or this may be the first time you’ve really thought about it all that deeply. But hazily is the key, and at the heart of the dichotomy of managing creativity in business (to be clear, I’m not talking here about managing creative teams, but the extension in thinking and reasoning should be fairly obvious by the end of this post) I’m talking about the things that all humans engaged in a business should be doing to fulfill their reason for being utilized as an asset for that business. I’m being deliberately cold and economic/ shareholder-theory-ish about this description deliberately to hold a mirror up to the sub-optimal way most of us operate. What do I mean? If you think of yourself at your best. Your most creative. When you really flew……. the piece of work, at whatever stage of your life, that you produced that when you’ve looked back at it were really impressed. Really impressed with what had fused together and been born inside of you. That process from within that caused this thing in front of you to exist.

These words, this idea, the sculpture, painting or design…..

That best of you is arguably what your business (be it yours, or an employee), should be getting out of you. Being frank, your value to any business is the value you deliver to the bottom line. Your utilization as an asset for that business is arguably one of the sole functions of management. And yet how often do you do that?

You may be thinking at this point either a. But I’m not creative, or b. Why should I give the ‘best of me’ to work (particularly if you’re a disenchanted employee)?

Well here’s the gem. The beautiful thing that nature has enabled in our current evolution: we’re built to do, to create and complete. We’re hard-wired (and arguably it’s the key to our success as a species) to try and get things done. In fact, as David Allen articulates so well in Ready for Anything, and I copied out in my last post: ‘the creative, active, energetic part of me needs something to do, something that it can do and complete – successfully, now’ The reality is that most people in business default to their deadlines and in-boxes as a source of fulfillment. Things are left to the very last…. we love deadlines because they force us to end our procrastination and get on and and do, and then post-deadline we get that nice chemical reward. We love/hate our in-boxes, but spend a lot of time there, because they’re full of little potential completions…… It’s easier to sit in there and get your little hits of successful completions right here, right now. But the point is that we want to successfully complete. We want to create and to do because our brains love the chemicals pumped in as rewards for completion. We’re therefore equally hardwired to give what we default to thinking of as being the best of ourselves at work because we’re addicted to the chemicals. As any job design specialist knows, if you don’t give the opportunities to complete the reward cycle (i.e. production line without targets), you disengage and quickly lose people.

“The quality of life is determined by its activities.” ― Aristotle

We’re also all creative: whether we think so or not. Joe Griffin and Ivan Tyrrell make a mathematically convincing point of this in their book, Human Givens: ‘We have the ability to think analogically, that is, to think holistically, and to recognize how a pattern metaphorically matches another pattern. But we also have the ability to think logically, to break problems down and analyze them. Our conscious mind’s preferred mode of operation is logical thought while that of our unconscious mind is analogical or ‘association of ideas’, as it is sometimes called. Unconscious thinking, therefore, represents by far the largest piece of brain activity because everything of which we are not immediately conscious is, by definition, unconscious’ Soooo. The point of the point of the point (you can tell I like this subject matter…..): We go to work or run our businesses by doing and completing things. But because we’re not consciously managing our creativity, we’re pretty much defrauding our employers or ourselves (with our own businesses). We’re spending most of our time in a relatively small, conscious, logical, analytical strip of our brains. The things that we could deliver to the greater good of the business success and the bottom line are like a hidden Egyptian tomb of riches and gold. The current leading business books and articles know that, amongst other things, our way out of any human difficulties comes from within – from harnessing our own creativity. The current scientific management hangovers from the birth of modern business need to be turned on their heads, and the wisdom of the internal crowds (your staff!) unleashed for your future corporate success.

So how do we do it? How do we stop selling ourselves short? Well, it’s taken me this long to state the problem so you can imagine how much I could wax lyrically on the answer.

The truth of the matter is that we, and our businesses, are currently structurally defective in this regard. We’re pre-conditioned, as I stated above, to go for the quick win/ sugar rush of the deadlines and the in-box. You didn’t think time management was so difficult for no reason did you?

Corporately, we’ll not be sacked for this ‘norm’ of operation because it’s the same from boardroom to mop bucket operator: it’s all about the doing. The answer to the creativity conundrum is actually quite simple: we have to first give ourselves time to analyze and gather information (we’re fairly good at doing this in business), and then we have to get hazy. We have to accept and admire apparently doing nothing: day dreaming and mind wandering. For this is the way in which we can think holistically; the way we create something by matching previously unmatched patterns in a different way.

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Do you listen to your gut feelings about people, to attract healthy relationships and avoid draining ones?

Do you heed your body’s early warning signs such as fatigue, to take care of your health?

Do you act on what moves and inspires you, rather than making decisions solely on paper?

Do you pay attention to vibes that people give off, positive and negative?

Do you listen to the wisdom of your dreams?

Do you know how access the intuitive wisdom of dreams?

Chris Brogan, a ten year veteran of using social media and both web and mobile technologies to build digital relationships, is a master of this. As an example, his post on ‘Communications in a Post Media World’, makes my brain fizz. Look at his post on Rabbit Holes, and you get an insight into some of his ways of creating. Charlie Gilkey of Productive Flourishing writes a great post on Create, Connect, Consume which highlights the clear importance of creating in the balance of things.

So the next time you find yourself staring into space, resist the urge to do. Instead, remember the proven science that you’re adding more value this way (and that you should really get a pay rise…): ‘when people are more aroused, these ‘brainwaves’ are of a higher frequency, and are more random, more ‘desynchronized’. When they are relaxed (but still awake), their brainwaves are slower and more synchronized: the socalled ‘alpha’ and ‘theta’ waves’ (Colin Martindale) Intuitive Thought "Intuition will tell the thinking mind where to look next." - Jonas Salk The impression, idea or fact which enters the conscious mind in a period of attunement.

Intuition means a looking after. It is described as a direct apprehension or immediate cognition, as in perception or consciousness; such as a quick or ready insight. These thoughts are identified as "instinctive knowing" (without the use of rational processes of the primary brain); which is interpreted as an impression that something might be the case; “he had an intuition that something had gone wrong” [synonym: {hunch}, {suspicion}]. This protective aspect of intuition is related to the root of the word tueri: protection, guarding, watch, protect. It is closely connected to the word Tuition or Tutor: Superintending care over a young person; the particular watch and care of a tutor or guardian over his pupil or ward; guardianship.

Our creative thinking exercises and processes will help you test your creativity, understand it and expand it.

"Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere."

—Chinese Proverb What Is Strategic Intuition?

"The best vision is insight." - Malcolm Forbes When do you get your best ideas? You probably answer “At night,” or “In the shower,” or “Stuck in traffic.” You get a flash of insight. Things come together in your mind. You connect the dots. You say to yourself, “Aha! I see what to do.” Brain science now reveals how these flashes of insight happen. It’s a special form of intuition. We call it strategic intuition, because it gives you an idea for action – a strategy.

Brain science tells us there are three kinds of intuition: ordinary, expert, and strategic.

Ordinary intuition is just a feeling, a gut instinct. Expert intuition is snap judgments, when you instantly recognize something familiar, the way a tennis pro knows where the ball will go from the arc and speed of the opponent’s racket. (Malcolm Gladwell wrote

about this kind of intuition in Blink.) The third kind, strategic intuition, is not a vague feeling, like ordinary intuition. Strategic intuition is a clear thought. And it’s not fast, like expert intuition. It’s slow. That flash of insight you had last night might solve a problem that’s been on your mind for a month. And it doesn’t happen in familiar situations, like a tennis match. Strategic intuition works in new situations. That’s when you need it most.

Can You Learn Strategic Intuition?

Just from these few words, you’ve started on the circular pathway to strategic Intuition. In Strategic Intuition: The Creative Spark in Human Achievement, William Duggan finally explains how the mind forms great leaps and how throughout time individuals have used strategic intuition to change the world. Strategic Intuition should be required reading for anyone in the venture capital business and will help you learn much more. "Whether the subject is art, science, or business, William Duggan takes us on a fascinating exploration into how the human brain connects experience and knowledge to create entirely new ideas in momentary flashes of insight. A definitely important read for anyone charged with bringing innovation to strategic leadership."— Robin Harper, vice president, marketing and community development, Linden Lab, creator of Second Life.

“Choice, not chance, determines your destiny.” ― Aristotle Some people have certainly learned it on their own, without even knowing what exactly they’re doing. But like all other complex human actions, you are born without it and over time your brain learns it. These days, the hardest part to learn is the third step, presence of mind. When you need a creative idea for a strategy, methods of Plod or Plot or Play spring to mind right away. Presence of mind means you clear your mind of these false paths and let your strategic intuition go to work.

Or perhaps your parents said you can achieve anything you want to as long as you believe in yourself and work hard to get it. That’s true for riding a bike – they knew you could do it – but that’s not true for jumping off the roof and flying like a bird. For that one, they did not say you can achieve anything you want. The flash of insight tells you what you can and cannot achieve, and this is the hardest step for our modern age. So the most important reason I wrote this book is first of all so that people can start unlearning all the wrong ideas they’ve got in their minds about how to achieve great things in life.

Professor to watch: Bill Duggan of Columbia Business School

By Della Bradshaw Published: October 22 2007 09:51 | Last updated: October 22 2007 09:51 As academics go, Bill Duggan is refreshingly down-to-earth. An associate professor of management at Columbia Business School in New York, he specialises in what he calls “strategic intuition”.

Or, as he elucidates: “How do good ideas form in your mind? It’s certainly not in the brainstorming meeting scheduled for 2.30.”

When you ask people when they have their best ideas, he says, the answer is often in the middle of the night, in the shower, or when stuck in a traffic jam. And it is ideas creation that intrigues Prof Duggan.

He relies on the latest brain research that has been enabled by MRI technology, which reveals that there are actually three different types of intuition: ordinary, expert, and strategic. Ordinary intuition is a gut instinct; expert intuition is snap judgments based on previous experience – a professional footballer knows where a ball will land when he kicks it, for example; but it is the third kind, strategic intuition, in which he is most interested.

Strategic intuition is not a vague feeling, nor a reaction, but a flash of insight that solves a problem you may have been pondering for months. So how do you teach yourself to be strategically intuitive?

Prof Duggan has come up with a four-point description of how strategic intuition works.

To begin with, you store information over time in the “shelves” in the brain. Second, you relax or clear your mind – “presence of mind”, he calls this. Then different pieces of information selectively move together in your mind to form a flash of insight. Fourth, resolution to act propels you forward.

The most difficult part of the process is achieving “presence of mind” he says, though this is a technique often used in eastern religions, for example in meditation or yoga.

The implications of the theory are that there is nothing new, he says. He cites examples of several companies that have come up with strategies, such as Starbucks coffee shops. The founders of the chain acknowledge that the idea came in Italy over a cup of coffee in one of the many local espresso bars. Starbucks adapted that concept to the US market and the rest, as they say, is history.

The idea that there is nothing new is both unnerving and liberating, he says. And there are clear ways to apply the theory to the corporate world.

For example, if a company has a problem to solve, then one way to look at it would be first to ask: has any other company in the world solved part of this problem? It is a

strategy that has been used to great effect in GE, he says. “It overturns the conventional notion of strategy.�

He also proposes the idea of “reverse brainstorming” – people in the meeting identify the problem and then go away for a period of time to allow strategic intuition to work – often when they least expect it. “When brainstorming works, it is when someone has brought an idea into the meeting,” he says; the idea was not generated in the meeting, as often supposed.

On an individual level he points out those most negative emotions are caused by the frustration of not reaching a target or goal. “You have to give up your goal to see what you have to do,” says Prof Duggan. “It’s a discipline of the mind.” By following the steps to achieve strategic intuition, you can turn negative emotions into developing a strategy for your personal as well as professional life, he believes.

He says this is particularly true in a country such as the US, where students are often taught that if they work hard enough they can achieve anything they want. This is patently untrue, he points out. His route he describes as a “pragmatic theory of achievement”. With a true sense of academic integrity, Prof Duggan willingly concedes that his concept of strategic intuition is not new either. “I didn’t invent it; I stole it.” In fact, he says he stole it from Napoleon Bonaparte, France’s most famous military leader and from Carl von Clausewitz, who wrote the classic military strategy about Napoleon, On War. According to Prof Duggan, Napoleon had flashes of inspiration or strategic intuition, which he calls Napoleon’s glance, or coup d’oeil. He even goes as far as to point out that the word “strategy” entered the English language in 1810, when Napoleon’s success as a battlefield general made him emperor of Europe.

Indeed, the great military strategists from ancient to modern time, as well as business and social leaders, demonstrated this strategic intuition, says Prof Duggan. “Take a close look at great heroes of history and you see that they’re all very different, except for one thing: they’re all great strategists,” he writes in the opening paragraph of Napoleon’s Glance: The Secret of Strategy, published in 2002. A year later Prof Duggan published The Art of What Works: How Success Really Happens and this year he will publish his third book, Strategic Intuition: The Creative Spark in Human Achievement, which will be published in November. The book is a first for Columbia Business School as it is the first book to be published under the business school’s own imprint.

Prof Duggan’s theories are certainly proving popular. In spring 2007 his course was the highest rated by Columbia students of all 218 courses on the menu that semester. In the spring he will be teaching his course again to MBA and Executive MBA students with shorter versions of the course taught on non-degree executive education custom and open enrolment programs.

Strategic Intuition: The Creative Spark in Human Achievement, published November 2

by Columbia Business School Publishing (http://columbiapress.typepad.com/strategic_intuition)

Copyright The Financial Times Limited 2009

The relationship between art and the artist is a mysterious paradox.

Intuition is the creative force behind great artists.

“PLOT is CHARACTER revealed by ACTION.” ― Aristotle Many years ago I started taking improvisation lessons. As a young, inspired actor, I wanted to learn how to think faster on my feet, trust my “gut instincts” and how to speak up in auditions without feeling a clench in my stomach. I also thought improv techniques would help me work more fluidly with my business clients, and that the classes would add some zest to my usual round of activities.

The experience was great.

What I didn’t know was: • There are rules for improvisation; • If we followed some of these rules in business we would quickly increase the ability to trust our teammates and bosses, think more effectively under pressure, sell and manage more powerfully, and have a lot of fun in the process.

Above all, improv is about teaching kindness. Who knew?

For example, we played a game called ‘Hotspot’. As a group we turned our faces to the wall, and one of us had to go into the middle of the room and start singing. Of course, the first person was embarrassed. Very quickly, one of us facing the wall had to save the singer by taking his place and starting to sing. Then we repeated the process: save and sing, save and sing. The goals of the exercise are to take a risk, not let your teammate look silly for too long, and to save each other graciously, even making the previous singer look good.

What a concept! What if that was the focus of how we interact with each other in sales meetings? Take a risk . . . I will save you when you risk embarrassment . . . and I’ll try to make you look good. Sales meetings could even become enjoyable, and more people would look forward to attending them.

"If you want creative workers, give them enough time to play." John Cleese (1939present)

Here are some other improv exercises that could help enliven your meetings, teach some valuable skills, and boost business at the same time. Each activity only takes minutes.

‘Yes, and…’ (Versus ‘No, but…’ or ‘Yes, but…’)

The intent: To tell a story by accepting and building on each other’s ideas rather than by blocking them.

The process: One person starts a story by saying a simple sentence, such as, “Joe went to the store”. The next person adds to the storyline, beginning the sentence with “Yes, and… he bought an ice cream cone.” Keep going, starting every sentence with,”Yes, and…” until the story concludes. If, after everyone has had at least 2 – 3 turns, an ending isn’t in sight, ask the next few people to start concluding.

In every group, some people have trouble accepting and building. In Improv, we ask the person who blocked an idea to try again, using “Yes, and. . .”

If your team begins a sales meeting with this game, all the participants can agree to only use “Yes, and . . . “throughout the rest of the meeting discussion. See what happens. The payoffs of “Yes and …“to your business can be huge: breaking down barriers, generating ideas, and increasing cooperation and trust. You can also do this exercise on the phone, so it works well for virtual teams.

Environment Build This is a physical variation of ‘Yes, and…’ I’ve started using this activity in my training classes, and it’s hilarious.

The intent: To quickly create a frozen scene with three people, each person building on the action.

The process: Everyone stands in a circle. One person moves into the center of the circle, announces what object he or she is, and then freezes in that position (i.e., “I am a tree.”) A second person comes in, announces what he or she is, and freezes in that position (“I am a dog walking toward the tree.”) A third person enters the scene, announces the next part of the tableau, and freezes in that position (“I am the owner of the dog, holding the leash.”)

The first person then takes him/herself and one other out of the scene. (i.e., removes the tree and the dog.) The next scene begins,” I am the owner of the dog, holding the leash.” The next two people build on that scene, creating something entirely new, and so on.

The business payoff: When people have fun creating together, they can come up with innovative ideas for tackling sa1es and other business issues. Also, it is impossible to make mistakes in this activity, so it is very safe to include everyone (even those who are shy or contained) and reap a variety of ideas from all participants.

Tongue Twisters

The intent: Loosen up everyone’s lips before a meeting begins.

Try these words as a group (repeat each about 10 times, very quickly)  Unique New York  Toy Boat  Red leather, yellow leather  She stood on the balcony, inexplicably mimicking him hiccupping, amicably welcoming him in. (Good luck with this one! It’s not as bad as it looks.)

The business payoff: Everybody has already tripped over their tongues in front of the group, so they can participate comfortably. This is another great exercise for virtual teams.

As we look for ways to improve our rapport with customers, clients and prospects let’s cast our gaze to improv — improvisational behavior popularized by those whacky folks seen in drama classes, theatre troupes, on the entertaining television show, Whose Line Is It Anyway? It might surprise you to learn that even in something as spontaneous as Improvisation there are rules at play. Three in particular have direct relevance to our customer and client interactions.

Make Your Partner Look Good. Improv is a collaborative effort. So too are customer relationships. You are partners with your clients, customers and prospects on projects, contracts, campaigns, programs and special events. When you help customers get what they want, you get what you want. Always ask yourself how you can help them look good, excel and succeed. When Improv games work most effectively each partner's actions help the other look good. As a sales and service professional your work shouldn’t just be about making yourself look good. First, help your clients look good and you’ll shine in the process.

Be Spontaneous. So often we are bound by rules and regulations, restrictions and proscriptions. Sometimes we're so bogged down we can't respond to the issue at hand.

There are times our colleagues and customers expect and deserve our abilities to think and act on our feet in a spontaneous manner. In a world where we are quick to champion an "adapt or die" philosophy we must not forget the ability to be spontaneous, making decisions by feel and impulsively as the case may call for. Be ready, willing and able to eschew guidelines and apply creativity to solve problems and your clients succeed. Give yourself permission to be spontaneous and admire the results.

Say "Yes, AND…." So often we are apt to respond to comments, suggestions and inquiries with some variation of "Yes, but…" The impact is immediate: whatever "offer" being advanced is now qualified, mitigated, diminished or otherwise muted. Your customer's world of possibilities has just been restricted. The idea in question, once ripe with potential, has now been shackled. When we instead respond "Yes, and…" it builds on what has been said, allowing for both parties to co-create a solution. Instead of a competition between ideas or a zero-sum game where just one point of view prevails, now both parties are actively creating solutions and future success scenarios.

Teaming With Success Teamwork is the lubricant of success in the marketplace. Spontaneity and a sincere respect for your clients facilitates teamwork. Your spontaneity is a gift to your customers.

As in any artistic endeavor, we must learn to trust our impulses and be ourselves.

Improvisers learn that bypassing the little judgment voices in our heads — daring to be obvious, for example; staying present and reacting naturally — will always stand us in better stead than trying to do or say the 'right' thing. Trusting our impulses helps us learn to be in sync with the reality of the moment. I believe that just as a live audience knows the difference between real and contrived, so too do your co-workers; your spouses, your children; your friends.

WHAT GOES AROUND COMES AROUND Every individual has unique patterns of intuition and creativity.

Developing intuition opens wonderful creative possibilities.

Often, what people say about other people behind their backs is a nasty reflection on the talker. You might be surprised by what I heard from an IRS executive.

Several years ago, my office received an inquiry about hiring me to keynote an upperlevel management meeting for a Fortune 500 production company. I personally called to follow-up and during the conversation the potential client stated she worked for a real b-ee-och. It's a huge organization so I asked, "Which division in the agency?" With hesitation and in a lowered voice she said, "Creative." There was a pause.

It was obvious she was uncomfortable. Then she said in a tone that makes a nonquestion sound like a question, "Some people are uncomfortable with them -- you know, because of their reputation as artsy?" She told me she had worked there for years but she kept referring to coworkers as they. She said things like, "They are having problems with morale," instead of choosing to say, "We are having problems with morale." And I thought, "You don't sound too smart. You're ashamed of where you work and you're distancing yourself from it. You can't be contributing much. Do the agency and yourself a favor and change your attitude or get out."

Was I harsh? All I did was instinctively react to the silent message she sent. When I hear someone knocking where they work, I hear them down-grading themselves. Saying they when talking about the organization implies the talker is not a team player, not a leader, not committed, not willing to shoulder responsibility for improvement, and not particularly valuable in the grand scheme of things. And to me, that doesn't sound smart.

The bottom line is this: When you are on a parade float, you never benefit from pushing people off the float into the crowd. Never denigrate the people you work with. This includes your boss, co-workers, and customers. If you ever find yourself on a parade float you no longer want to be on, do everyone a favor and get off the float!

I too am a strong proponent of the use of Improv techniques for improving team building – your listening and overall communication skills – to say nothing of sharpening your sales and service orientation. I invite you to take an Improv class, employ Improv techniques in meetings and off-sites, and look again at Whose Line Is It Anyway? for its value in stimulating your creativity and enhancing the tools in your sales and service tool kit.

[Toastmasters are Masters of Improv Another great place to sharpen your improv skills is through Toastmasters International, the communication and leadership program with thousands of clubs worldwide. Since 1924 members have been engaging in Table Topics, a form of extemporaneous speaking where participants are given a topic and expected to think and speak on their feet, without prior preparation, for 1-2 minutes at a time. It's simultaneously scary, fun and fulfilling too. Yet the fear quickly turns into fun!]

I am passionate about human development, emotional intelligence and the evolution of consciousness. You might say I have a gut feeling about it.

ABOUT GUT FEELINGS Ever have that gut feeling about something - but just don't know what that message is or where it's coming from? Well that gut feeling is really your intuition. And just what is intuition? Think of intuition as a partner - someone who only wants to help you and guide you. The only problem with this partner is that it doesn't speak the same language as you.

INTUI-SPEAK INTUI-SPEAK or, intuitive-speaking doesn't always spell things out for you and give you instructions in terms you'll understand. In order to develop your intuition - you have to first understand its language - and this is often the tricky part.

We all have the right answers inside of us.

“Educating the head without educating the heart is no education at all” ― Aristotle The key is to know how to draw them out. Develop the power of your subconscious mind so that you create the life you want. With creative thinking exercises, you will be able to: • Generate more ideas and solutions.

• Make decisions and solve problems more easily.

• Brainstorm and be your own think tank.

• Experience more laughter and fun as you develop courage, trust and faith.

With Creative Thinking Exercises, just one of our short exercises can triple your creativity.

And as you develop self-trust and awareness, you will build the confidence to generate many innovative ideas and solutions.

Developing intuition and self-trust improves all aspects of your life • Overcome blocks to intuition and learn the 6 A’s of developing intuition and make wiser choices that keep you on the higher path. Be your own psychic.

• Develop intuition and tap into your own inner wisdom Benefits of Developing Your Intuition • Make better, heart-based decisions more often • Improve physical, mental, emotional health • Increase effectiveness at home, work, school • Reduce stress • Maximize your creativity

"If you lose the power to laugh, you lose the power to think." - Clarence Darrow Developing intuition puts you on the paths to healing, wholeness and our personal evolution. We each have access to an inner guidance that knows the way. Answers to the questions of our lives are available every moment. We need just listen.

Spark your self-awareness and develop your intuition with me. My staff and I will guide you in the all-important process of paying attention. With higher awareness, you'll begin to attune to higher spiritual and divine guidance.

Slow down and let the moments teach you.

As you develop intuition you will: • save time • make fewer mistakes • align with your essence • develop courage and faith • have more laughter and fun • have more laughter and fun • solve problems faster and easier • develop self-trust and self confidence • find more meaning and purpose in your life • enhance your quality of life, health, wealth and dreams • improve your spirituality, abundance, growth, love and fulfillment Begin to tune in to your intuition now. THINK: INTUI-SPEAK… Explore discerning the higher from the lower, and the inner from the outer.

What Is Possible

“All human actions have one or more of these seven causes: chance, nature, compulsion, habit, reason, passion, and desire.” ― Aristotle, Selected Works Imagine for a moment—if you could tap into your inner mind to directly pull out solutions to your deepest set problems.

Lost in religion? Imagine if you could feel a constant connectedness to God and discard the dogma and rubbish organized religion feeds you.

Gaining weight? Imagine if you could avoid the fad diets – but see yourself lose weight because your mindset has changed. You feel hungry and full at the right times; your metabolic rate stays up.

Depressed? Imagine if you could instantly understand the source of your depression and then reprogram your mind to pull you out.

Missing your goals? Imagine if you could create coincidences with your mind—just like the many masters who have walked the world can.

Unhealthy? Imagine if you could automatically induce the placebo effect to speed up your body’s natural rate of healing.

Now Imagine If… You had the knowledge. Imagine if you’d spent the world studying various mental disciplines – and had attained a degree of self-mastery where you can tap into your inner power to help you resolve life’s most urgent problem.

How would your family benefit? Whom would you influence? What would you seek to change about this world? How will you be remembered when you pass on? Who will you teach?

Or the biggest question of all – How would you leave your mark on humanity?

"No one can force a person towards permanent and creative learning. They will learn only if they will to. Any other type of learning is temporary and inconsistent with the self, and will disappear as soon as the threat is removed."

—Ralph Waldo Emerson We often feel as if we "know" things without actually having the information from an outside source. The classic example that nearly everyone can relate to is -- when you’re thinking of someone and within a short period of time, they phone you “out-of-theblue.” Or, the telephone ringing, and knowing who’s calling before you answer it.

Many of the most difficult problems have been and are not susceptible to a primarily intellectual approach. Intuition aids us in dealing with these problems as a sort of poor relation to intellect. We recognize the need for inspiration and creativity, but treat these as magical gifts and not as a talent that can be neglected or developed.

“Where your talents and the needs of the world cross, there lies your calling” ― Aristotle Intuitive Sales

“The secret of business is to know something that nobody else knows.” ― Aristotle What separates ordinary salespeople from Heavy Hitters?

The best salespeople are those "Heavy Hitters" who are able to use human nature, language, and intuition to build trusting relationships with customers and persuade them to buy. Based on his proven and effective sales program, author Steve Martin's Heavy Hitter Selling explains how you too can achieve and maintain that high level of sales success. Using real-world case studies, examples, and exercises, Martin provides the psychological, physical, and language-based tactics you need to turn yourself into a Heavy Hitter.

Inside his book, you'll find proven guidance and expert tips on: • Understanding how people think and communicate • Finding the right words at the right time • Predicting a customer's behavior and influencing his thoughts • Building customer rapport and understanding their motivations • Persuading both the customer's rational mind and his emotional subconscious side Like other sales books published recently, this one stresses the importance of human behavior. But unlike the others, it puts an emphasis on language. Salespeople could well benefit by exploring scientific models of language. Practical exercises make the book useful for everyone Ideas and strategies you can use to influence and persuade customers in any market and will help you make lots of money Traditional selling focuses on product, price, and competition and misses the most important reason people buy: people and emotion. Heavy Hitter Selling offers a different perspective that is valuable in understanding how to win.

All salespeople remember the highlights of their sales calls. They can easily recall who they met with and whether the meeting was fruitful or a bust. However, one of the major differences between average salespeople and truly great salespeople (Heavy Hitters) is their ability to recognize and remember a wider spectrum of information from sales calls. They use their accumulated experiences to determine what they should say and do when face-to-face with prospective customers.

Sales Intuition

This process is called “sales intuition” – comparing a series of past experiences against current circumstances. Most salespeople don’t think about their sales intuition since it works automatically. In reality, sales intuition is a highly developed model for making decisions and a powerful heuristic engine that is constantly learning from the past. In other words, salespeople are constantly learning from past customer experiences and continually incorporating these new reference points as part of their decision-making process.

As salespeople we spend most of our time trying to predict the behavior, intentions, attitudes, and feelings of our customers. Sales intuition and memory work hand-in-hand in determining what we should say and do next. The best salespeople collect more data points and intuitively know how to store them.

How Successful Salespeople Use Language and Intuition to Persuade Customers to Buy “ALWAYS TRUST THE GUT!” – Everett Hoag The game of selling is fluid and creative. But like hamsters on a wheel, we sometimes get stuck in repetitive, narrow thinking and acting that waste our energy and inhibit our creativity. To reach our full potential as salespeople and to enjoy the game of selling, we must break out of logical yet limiting patterns and release our ability to sell creatively.

Your imagination is your most effective tool in doing this. In today's highly competitive times, the old hackneyed approaches just won't work. Your prospects have developed calluses to protect them against the cliché techniques of ad sales people. You must present your magazine in a unique way that is most relevant and moving for your client.

We operate in an environment in which we and our clients are bombarded with thousands of facts about demographics, audits, prices, CPMs and responses to sales conversions rates. Cumulatively, the effect can be deadening. It is your job to separate the significant from the irrelevant, to make value judgments, and, most important, to use information to spark rather than kill creativity. As Albert Einstein said, in much of life, "imagination is more important than knowledge.”

By stimulating your imagination and thinking creatively, you can bring your business alive. By engaging in creative processes with your clients, you can develop creative solutions to their marketing problems. Getting started so the question is, how do we activate our creativity? Creative selling often depends on your intuition and willingness to follow a good hunch. You must develop and trust your ability to read between the lines, and then trust your intuitive sense of what's really happening with your prospects.

Do you hard-press one client for a decision, or do you back off. Do you go over a difficult prospect's head, or do you ride it out with that prospect? At times you may use linear logic to reach your decision. At other times, your game sense, your instinct, will magically give you the answer.

Roy Rowan, author of The Intuitive Manager, explains that "intuition is knowledge gained without rational thought. And since it comes from some stratum of awareness just below the conscious level, it is slippery and elusive, to say the least." “New ideas,” Rowan explains, "spring from a mind that organizes experiences, facts, and relationships to discern a path that has not been taken before.” Our analytical minds lead us only part way down the path to a fruitful decision. “The last step to success,” as Rowan puts it, "frequently requires a daring intuitive leap."

We can learn to ask, listen to, and trust our intuition. But now that we're "reasonable" adults with our mature facemask and grounded posturing, we may have forgotten how to use our imaginations the way we freely did as children. We may need to rediscover the child within and reclaim our imagination.

As Picasso said, "Every child is an artist. The problem is how to remain an artist after he grows up."

I began my ventures in releasing creativity with a book by Roger von Oech called, A Whack on the Side of the Head. In it, he explains that we need to break our "mental locks," to "assault our assumptions," and not to let our routines "imprison our thinking."

Once we have learned to free ourselves, we can find ways to help our selves, our team, and our clients see things differently.

One way I gave myself a "whack on the side of the head" was to take a drawing class.

Drawing changes the way you look at things. It helps you to start thinking along new, natural, organic, holistic lines.

Effective selling is also about learning to see and about engaging in holistic thinking. The Noble Prize winner, Albert Szent-Gyorgyi, points out that "discovery consists of looking at the same thing as everyone else and thinking something different.” You might indeed discover new opportunities your client never thought of when you’re selling, you need to do more than just peddle slogans and ad space: you must be a sales and marketing consultant, solving problems for and planning strategies with your clients.

USING BOTH SIDES OF THE BRAIN In one drawing class, my teacher had us draw what we saw upside-down as a way to release us from preconceived notions about "seeing." For instance, she gave me a picture of a dog scratching its tail. By holding the picture upside-down, I couldn't be influenced by my idea of what a scratching dog should look like. Rather, my attention was on the lines and forms in the picture. Released from "having to do it right," I created a picture by drawing upside-down that looked very much like the original picture.

We found out later that the purpose of this exercise was to confuse the left hemisphere of the brain, which, some say, is the seat of all the analytical thinking we do. Since I couldn't easily characterize the different pieces of the upside-down picture, I became so disoriented that my left brain "shut down." Consequently, my right brain, in charge of creative thinking, had the opportunity to take over.

Using your right brain lets you draw relationships, patterns and analogies that are truthful, moving and more persuasive than mere data. In ad sales, using your right brain can help lead you to the heart of the issue, from your client's viewpoint as an outside pair-of-eyes, quickly putting you face to face with the real issues.

To see how to use the right brain, we need to trick the left brain by taking away what is familiar.

As Von Oech explains in, A Whack on the Side of the Head, "Without the ability to temporarily forget what we know, our minds remain cluttered up with ready-made answers, and we never have the opportunity to ask the questions that lead off the path in new directions."

To further develop our right brain and teach ourselves to see "holistically", our drawing teacher introduced us to gesture drawing. Here, a live model moves from one pose to another about every 60 seconds. We learned how to perceive the whole being quickly, capturing the essence rather than getting stuck on the details. How many times do we find ourselves in a selling situation in which we get lost in the details?

COMMUNICATING WHAT WE FEEL For most of us sales types, our greatest skill is our ability to communicate. But that doesn't necessarily mean talking. If you have any doubt, try going on a 24-hour silence, as I often do. At first, you panic. But after a while you discover that you can communicate by writing notes-but somehow that seems to defeat the purpose of the exercise. Once you give up your notepad, you discover that you don't need to talk to get the attention and support you want. In fact, you might even get even more attention. By quietly watching what’s going on around you, I might be able to observe and understand on a deeper level. And when you need to express yourself, you might do so more clearly and forcefully.

While I'm not advocating the use of crayons to make a hand-drawn presentation or that you perform in mime on your next sales call, an occasional excursion into the arts will free up your creativity, which will strengthen your sales skills.

Without language you wouldn’t be able to share ideas, display your personality, and express yourself to the world. You wouldn’t communicate your needs and desires to others, and the never-ending dialogue within your mind would stop.

The words we speak truly define who we are. However, since we’re talking all the time, we underestimate the complexity of communication and take the process for granted.

The conversations we have with customers are quite complex. They consist with verbal and non-verbal messages that are sent consciously and subconsciously. Successful customer communications are the foundation of all sales and we need to learn to speak the language of customers, not the language of sellers.

The sales process has an entirely intangible, human side. Mastery of the intangible, intuitive human element of the sales process is what separates winners from other sales people.

Neurolingusitics is the study of how the human brain uses and interprets language.

Specially apply this concept of neurolingusitics to the sales process and specifically when communicating with potential customers.

First impressions Can you close a sale in just seven seconds? You can do it even faster if you make a great first impression. Seven seconds is the average length of time you have to make a first impression. If your first impression is not good you won’t get another chance with that potential client. But if you make a great first impression you can bet that the client is more likely to take you and your company seriously.

We have all heard this warning: You never get a second chance to make a good first impression.

Also, human behavior specialists caution that we only have from seven to seventeen seconds of interacting with strangers before they form an opinion of us.

Seven tips for making your first impression strongly positive With this widely acknowledged pressure to make our case instantly, here are my seven tips for making your first impression strongly positive.

ONE: The greatest way to make a positive first impression is to demonstrate immediately that the other person--not you--is the center of action and conversation.

Illustrate that the spotlight is on you only, and you'll miss opportunities for friendships, jobs, promotions, love relationships, networking, and sales. Show that you are othercentered, and first-time acquaintances will be eager to see you again.

Recently I attended a conference. At lunch, my wife and I sat with several people we didn't know. While most of our tablemates made good impressions, one man emerged as the person we'd be sure to avoid all weekend. He talked about himself, non-stop.

Only rarely did anyone else get a chance to speak. Unfortunately, he probably thought he was captivating us with his life story.

I applaud this definition of a bore: Somebody who talks about himself so much that you don't get to talk about yourself.

TWO: You'll make a superb initial impression when you demonstrate good listening skills.

Give positive verbal cues: Hmmm . . . . Interesting! Tell me more, please. What did you do next?

Just as actors benefit from prompts, your conversational partner will welcome your assistance in keeping the exchange going.

Nonverbally, you show you're a skilled listener by maintaining steady eye contact.

Remember how you respond to the social gadabout who appears to be looking over your shoulder for the next person he or she wants to corner. Remember, and offer full attention to everyone you meet.

THREE: Use the name of a new acquaintance frequently. Example: Judy, I like that suggestion. Or: Your vacation must have been exciting, Fred. You show that you have

paid attention from the start, catching the name during the introduction. Equally as important, you'll make conversations more personal by including the listener's name several times.

FOUR: Be careful with humor.

Although a quip or two might serve as an icebreaker, stay away from sarcastic remarks that could backfire. Because you don't know a stranger's sensitivities, prolonged joking might establish barriers you can't overcome, either now or later.

FIVE: Give up the need to be right.

This was Dr. Wayne Dyer's advice in his wonderful book, Real Magic. Confrontations with somebody you've just met will destroy rapport before you even start building it. Wait until you have established credibility before you challenge another's statements.

SIX: Appearance counts. Several years ago, a professional colleague offered to meet me for lunch. I decided against wearing a suit, opting for a sport coat and tie. When he showed up in shorts and sandals, the message he conveyed was: Bill, meeting you is a rather ordinary experience, and doesn't call for me to present a business-like appearance. Not surprisingly, that was the last time I met with him.

True, standards for appropriate attire have changed drastically. Maybe the best advice I can share came from a participant in a communication seminar I conducted. She said: I don't dress for the job I have now, I dress for the job I want to have.

SEVEN: Speak clearly, confidently, and convincingly.

As a communication specialist, I have to point out that an individual's speaking style impacts the first impression, maybe more than we wish. Listeners judge our intelligence, our cultural level, our education, even our leadership ability by the words we select-and by how we say them.

Think of Professor Henry Higgins of My Fair Lady, who changed a so-called guttersnipe into a lady, by teaching her to speak skillfully. While none of us occupies the lowly level of Eliza Doolittle, we can keep her example in mind. Rather than mumble, speak so you're easily heard. Enunciate clearly. Alter your pitch, to avoid the dullness of a monotone. Display animation in both voice and facial expression. Gesture naturally, without miming your movements.

Keep these seven tips in mind. They will reduce your fear of business and social encounters with unfamiliar faces. More positively, you'll start enjoying poise and success that you thought were beyond your reach.

Whether your initial meeting is face-to-face, over the phone or via the Internet, you do not have time to waste. It pays for you to understand how people make their first judgment and what you can do to be in control of the results.

1. Learn What People Use To Form Their First Opinion.

When you meet someone face-to-face, 93% of how you are judged is based on nonverbal data - your appearance and your body language. Only 7% is influenced by the words that you speak. Whoever said that you can't judge a book by its cover failed to note that people do. When your initial encounter is over the phone, 70% of how you are perceived is based on your tone of voice and 30% on your words. Clearly, it's not what you say - it's the way that you say it.

2. Choose Your First Twelve Words Carefully.

Although research shows that your words make up a mere 7% of what people think of you in a one-on-one encounter, don't leave them to chance. Express some form of thank you when you meet the client. Perhaps, it is "Thank you for taking your time to see me today" or "Thank you for joining me for lunch." Clients appreciate you when you appreciate them.

3. Use The Other Person's Name Immediately.

There is no sweeter sound than that of our own name. When you use the client’s name in conversation within your first twelve words and the first seven seconds, you are sending a message that you value that person and are focused on him. Nothing gets other people's attention as effectively as calling them by name.

4. Pay Attention To Your Hair.

Your clients will. In fact, they will notice your hair and face first. Putting off that muchneeded haircut or color job may cost you the deal. Very few people want to do business with someone who is unkempt or whose hairstyle does not look professional.

Don't let a bad hair day cost you the connection.

5. Keep Your Shoes In Mint Condition.

People will look from your face to your feet. If your shoes aren't well maintained, the client will question whether you pay attention to other details. Shoes should be polished as well as appropriate for the business environment. They may be the last thing you put on before you walk out the door, but they are often the first thing your client notices.

6. Walk Fast.

Studies show that people who walk 10-20% faster than others are viewed as important and energetic - just the kind of person your clients want to do business with. Pick up the pace and walk with purpose if you want to impress. You never know who may be watching.

7. Fine Tune Your Handshake.

The first move you make when meeting your prospective client is to put out your hand.

There isn't a businessperson anywhere who can't tell you that the good business handshake should be a firm one. Yet time and again people offer a limp hand to the client. You'll be assured of giving an impressive grip and getting off to a good start if you position your hand to make complete contact with the other person's hand. Once you've connected, close your thumb over the back of the other person's hand and give a slight squeeze. You'll have the beginning of a good business relationship.

8. Make Introductions With Style.

It does matter whose name you say first and what words you use when making introductions in business. Because business etiquette is based on rank and hierarchy, you want to honor the senior or highest ranking person by saying his name first. When

the client is present, he is always the most important person. Say the client's name first and introduce other people to the client. The correct words to use are "I'd like to introduce..." or "I'd like to introduce to you..." followed by the name of the other person.

9. Never Leave The Office Without Your Business Cards.

Your business cards and how you handle them contribute to your total image. Have a good supply of them with you at all times since you never know when and where you will encounter a potential client. How unimpressive is it to ask for a person's card and have them say, “Oh, I'm sorry. I think I just gave my last one away." You get the feeling that this person has already met everyone he wants to know. Keep your cards in a card case or holder where they are protected from wear and tear. That way you will be able to find them without a lot of fumbling around, and they will always be in pristine condition.

10. Match Your Body Language To Your Verbal Message.

A smile or pleasant expression tells your clients that you are glad to be with them. Eye contact says you are paying attention and are interested in what is being said. Leaning in toward the client makes you appear engaged and involved in the conversation. Use as many signals as you can to look interested and interesting.

In the business environment, you plan your every move with potential clients. You arrange for the appointment, you prepare for the meeting, you rehearse for the presentation, but in spite of your best efforts, potential clients pop up in the most unexpected places and at the most bizarre times. For that reason, leave nothing to chance. Every time you walk out of your office, be ready to make a powerful first impression.

The Human Nature of Communication

When you lose touch with inner stillness, you lose touch with yourself. When you lose touch with yourself, you lose yourself in the world.- Eckhart Tolle How people communicate 30 Seconds to a Great First Impression It takes 30 seconds to win or lose a sale. In the sales profession that 30second first impression could cost or earn you the biggest sale of your life.

There is no better use of time and effort for printing salespeople than creating a positive first impression with executives who control buying decisions for print and print services.

Studies show that in the first 30 seconds or less of initial meeting, buyers have already made a lasting and unshakable perception of the salesperson.

Salespeople tell me that it is unfair for customers to judge them solely on their first impression. Unfortunately, human nature dictates that the initial contact proves to be the image that lasts in a person's mind. Once the image is set in a customer's mind, it is very difficult to change it. In selling, you seldom get that second chance.

Creating interest with decision makers is a key sales skill. The chief purpose of any initial approach call with an executive is to create enough interest in a printing company's offerings, to obtain their permission to gather requirements within the account. Without this agreement, the sale cannot go further. It is this step that determines whether a customer is a qualified prospect. Creating a great first impression is crucial to the eventual sale.

People use little telltale movements those adjustive movements that are so revealing.

So much communication is in our bodily movements and not our speech. So much is communicated in the way we speak, our inflections. The language a person uses is both verbal and nonverbal. Through the use of this “integral� language we express ourselves forming a complete representation of our personality and our self. The verbal and nonverbal language we use is directly related to human behavior. If you understand how a person uses language, you can build a model of expected behavior. Normally you communicate with a person’s conscious mind to get to their subconscious mind.

Hand to Hand – The Gentle Art of Touch Your handshake says a lot about you. It can convey confidence, warmth, and honesty, or it can signal weakness, uncertainty, and disinterest. Either way, it sends a subtle yet powerful message, about who you are, that is not lost on prospective buyers.

As sales professionals we’re told to make a “good first impression.” The most significant first impression we’ll make is shaking another person’s hand. Think about it; have you ever recoiled from a limp, dead fish handshake or winced in pain from a bone crusher?

How about your end: do you know what your handshake is telling others about you?

More than just physical contact, a handshake conveys a wealth of psychological information. We walk away from a handshake saying things like, “You know I just felt real comfortable with her” or “Don’t know why, and I simply don’t trust that guy.” Most people don’t spend time probing the depths of this unconscious communication; they just have a “feeling,” or a sense that their “intuition” is telling them something. However, there are things you can use by looking a little more closely at the experience.

What can you learn from another person’s handshake? What are you communicating through your handshake? Quite a bit, according to a study directed by University of Alabama associate professor of psychology Dr. William Chaplin. The study reported that more extroverted people had firmer handshakes and that this usually made a much better first impression. Nothing new in that statement, but what was interesting was that women who had firmer handshakes were also evaluated positively. Women with firm handshakes were deemed more open than were women with less firm handshakes. This runs counter to the stereotype about women being evaluated negatively when they take on traditional male characteristics—including hand strength.

Other research into non-verbal communications and specifically handshakes has provided some refinement on this idea. Much of this will be obvious to you, some might not. Regardless, not only will you get a sense of what your handshake communicates, you’ll be able to refine your interaction with others based on what their handshake tells you.

Sweaty Palms – Few people enjoy grabbing a wet rag. Shaking hands with a person whose hand feels like a wet rag is very uncomfortable. When a person is nervous their sympathetic nervous system often becomes overactive, sometimes resulting in sweaty palms. Do what you can to put this individual at ease. If you tend to be nervous on sales calls and have sweaty palms, you might discreetly blot your right hand on a handkerchief—or even on your pants or skirt—just before the handshake.

Dead Fish - Indifferent handshakes that feel like the person has no bones in their hand often indicate being passive or reserved. This handshake ranks as the number two least favored. Individuals with this type of clasp are generally not peoplefocused. Knowing this, you can tailor your presentation to de-emphasize the people aspect and focus more on the mechanical or thing-focused benefits. Exceptions to this rule might be musicians and surgeons whose livelihood depends on sensitive hands and who are therefore reluctant to open up to a bone crusher.

Brush Off – A quick grasp and then a release that feels like your hand being shoved aside. This handshake is a statement of “it’s my turf and my agenda that matters, yours doesn’t.” Listen first to what the person wants before talking about your ideas for them.

Controller – You feel your hand being pulled toward the person or strongly guided in a different direction, perhaps towards a chair. People who do this are controllers, which means they want to dominate any inanimate or animate object in the room (and that would include you). If your goals are different than theirs there may be challenges ahead. Do more listening than talking and see if you can find common ground so these individuals can control the situation toward your desired objective?

Politician – Your hand is firmly grasped as in a normal handshake. However, their other hand may cover yours or be placed on your forearm or shoulder. Unless the two of you are good friends, this is a form of false sincerity. The person is attempting to communicate that the two of you have a deeper relationship than you actually have. After receiving this kind of handshake, I recommend you check your pockets or purse to see if anything is missing. Similarly, be cautious about relying on this person’s word for anything and be attentive in your dealings with them.

Finger Vise – When someone grabs your fingers and not your entire hand it is meant to keep you at a distance. These people are often insecure. If they also crush your fingers they are adding a show of personal power, which is also designed to keep you at a distance or at least create some fear of challenging them. I wouldn’t recommend you be submissive, however it will serve your purpose to be somewhat deferential to them.

Bone Crusher – The message of squeezing your hand until you cringe is clearly designed to intimidate you. Even when the person may not know how strong they are, there is still a message of intimidation and power behind the grip. You don’t have to pretend to be a wimp with them, and, in fact, they may respond positively to you if you present yourself with strength. Just don’t get into a hand squeezing contest when you shake because then it becomes a competition and even if you win, you’ll lose.

Lobster Claw –The palm of your hand is touched by the other person’s thumb and finger(s), not unlike the claw of a lobster. The person doing this fears connecting at a deep level and may have challenges building relationships. Take your time; allow them to open up at their own pace. As they become more comfortable with you their handshake may actually change. Once they fully accept you, they can be a client for life.

Hand Wrestler – Your hand is taken normally and then twisted under the other person’s. This is usually done aggressively. Be very careful in your own presentation as this person is absolutely committed to being on top, regardless of what they say they want.

Tea Cup – This handshake feels normal except that there is no palm-to-palm contact. The other person’s palm is cupped, like a tea cup. This handshake indicates that the person is hiding something from you. It might just be a serious case of shyness or it could be something more substantial. Always check for missing information when working with this individual.

In any sales situation, the more you know about the person you’re dealing with, the better you can communicate with them and let them know you are there to serve their needs. Primed with the information presented here, you can start of creating a strong first impression by being aware of your own handshake, and learning the hidden messages in your client or customer’s. Then making a good impression is truly in your hands.

Use these pointers to make sure your handshake sends the right signals, and creates a good impression with prospects and customers.

• Avoid the power grip. A handshake should be firm, but not overly forceful. Beware of the unconscious tendency to pull the other person toward you as you shake. This can be interpreted as aggressive, and the prospect’s resistance to you will go up a notch or two.

• Nothing wimpy. It may seem painfully obvious, but it’s amazing how many salespeople offer weak, perfunctory handshakes. This is a major turnoff to many customers. Firm and friendly always wins the day.

• Look ‘em in the eye. As you extend your hand, establish eye contact and smile. Show some teeth! A warm and sincere greeting can make you an instant friend—and all things being equal, people prefer to buy from friends.

• Get a grip. Never grasp the other person’s fingers. Take their entire hand completely in yours, and gently pump it two or three times.

• Turn on the charm. You’ve been talking with a customer on the phone for several months, and meet them in person for the first time at a trade show. To express your pleasure at finally meeting face to face, you may want to cover his extended hand with your left hand briefly during the handshake. This increases the familiarity and warmth of the handshake. Do not attempt this with someone you don’t know. However, it is often a pleasant gesture when you are shaking hands with someone you’ve met previously. It simply says, “I’m very glad to see you again.”

• What to say? No handshake is complete without a spoken greeting. You can’t go wrong with, “It’s a pleasure to meet you.” When meeting someone of high rank, such as the chairman of the board or founder of a company, you may want to up the ante with, “It’s a great pleasure to meet you.” After the initial greeting, your conversation should begin while you are still shaking hands, for example, “John tells me you’ve made some significant additions to your product line.” Your hand should be slowly and somewhat reluctantly withdrawn as the person begins to speak. This slow withdrawal indicates your keen interest in the person and what he is saying.

• What’s your body language saying? Posture is important, so stand erect, about three feet (one pace) away from the client, with your hands out of your pockets. Face the client squarely; never approach from an angle, or when the subject is engaged in conversation or otherwise distracted. Wait until you have his full attention before extending your hand.

• Saying goodbye. When the meeting is over, it’s time to shake hands again. You now have the opportunity to leave a lasting impression. If you’ve established rapport with the buyer, it’s a good idea to gently grasp his right forearm with your left hand during the handshake, and restate any promises you may have made during the meeting, for example, “I’ll put the technical report you requested in the mail to you today, and give you a call next Wednesday. I enjoyed meeting you.” This two-handed shake signals your interest and commitment to your customer.

• Practice makes perfect. Much like dancing, the fine art of the handshake takes practice. Stand before a mirror and extend your hand. Check to see if you’re projecting an image of confidence, warmth, and enthusiasm. Keep in mind that your handshake reflects your personality, and should be a spontaneous gesture of friendly greeting that comes naturally from within. With a little rehearsal, you will develop the

ability to tailor your handshake to every situation you face, and each individual you meet.

Your handshake is a powerful business asset that can help you close more sales, and build lasting and profitable relationships. The time you spend working on it will be time well spent.

The 1960 Presidential Debates between Vice President Nixon and Senator Kennedy were the first nationally televised debates in presidential campaign history. With the advent of television the debates took on a visual dimension and for the first time, 70 million voters were given the opportunity to not only hear the candidates, but to visually compare them as well.

Surprisingly, opinion polls revealed a sharp contrast between the voters who had actually watched the debates on TV versus those who had merely listened to them on the radio. While radio listeners clearly thought that Nixon had won the first debate, television viewers were captivated by Kennedy's smile, charm and athletic appearance.

The majority of viewers interviewed reported that Nixon's five- o'clock shadow and darting eyes made him appear sinister and far less presidential than Senator Kennedy.

The television cameras underscored the significance of nonverbal communication and forever changed the political landscape.

Are You Missing Your Prospect's "Buy Signals?"

Think about the tremendous advantage you would have as a baseball manager if you knew the opposing team's signals and were able to anticipate their game plan. For example, suppose you knew in advance that the other team was planning to steal second base.

Obviously, your team would have a competitive edge because you would be able to adjust your strategy as necessary. Likewise, as a professional salesperson, you would be wise to monitor your prospect's body language and adjust your presentation accordingly. By reading your prospect's gestures you will minimize perceived sales pressure and know when it's appropriate to close the sale.

In 1872, Charles Darwin published the book "The Expressions in Man and Animals" and launched the modern study of nonverbal communication. Essentially, body language is a mixture of movement, posture and tone of voice. The good news about this subject is that your subconscious mind already understands the meaning of every gesture, posture and voice inflection. The bad news is, without the proper training you are unable to consciously apply this information during your client appointments.

Top salespeople and the most successful managers recognize the importance of nonverbal communication in the selling process and have learned to "listen with their eyes." They understand that one of the easiest and most effective ways to close sales is to be aware of their prospect's "buy signals." In addition to monitoring your prospect's body language, it's important to be mindful of your own gestures and keep them positive. Remember to unfold your arms, uncross your legs, nod your head in agreement and smile frequently.

The study of nonverbal communication is similar to learning a foreign language in that it requires time and effort to achieve fluency. Acquiring this important skill will allow you to communicate more effectively, read your prospect like a book and close more sales in less time.

Build Trust and Rapport Matching and mirroring your prospect's body language gestures is unconscious mimicry. It is a way of subconsciously telling another that you like them and agree with them. The next time you are at a social event, notice how many people are subconsciously matching one another. Likewise, when people disagree they subconsciously mismatch their body language gestures. The psychological principle behind matching and mirroring is that people want to do business with salespeople that they believe are similar to them.

You can build trust and rapport by deliberately, but subtly, matching your prospect's body language in the first fifteen minutes of the appointment. For example, if you notice that your prospect is crossing their arms, subtly cross your arms to match them.

After you believe you have developed trust and rapport, verify it by seeing if your prospect will match you. Uncross your arms and see if your prospect will match and mirror you as you move into a more open posture.

If you notice your prospect subconsciously matching your body language gestures, congratulations, this indicates that you have developed trust and rapport.

Conversely, if you notice your prospect mismatching your body language gestures, you know trust and rapport has not been established and you need to continue matching and mirroring them.

Body Language Quiz If you're a manager, consider using this quiz at your next training meeting to assess your sales team's current level of expertise. When sitting in on a sales appointment with your sales rep, be sure to incorporate nonverbal communications feedback in your critique.

Do you have a working knowledge of body language? See how many of the eight questions you can answer.

1. What emotion is associated with the "palm to chest" gesture?

A. Superiority B. Critical judgment C. Sincerity D. Confidence 2. What is the meaning of the "thumb under the chin" gesture?

A. Deceit B. Boredom C. Anxiety D. Critical judgment 3. What nonverbal message is conveyed with the "chin rub" gesture?

A. Decision B. Deceit C. Control D. None of the above 4. What does it mean when a person rubs his or her nose?

A. Superiority B. Anticipation C. Dislike D. Anger 5. What message is conveyed when a person touches his or her eyeglasses to their lips?

A. Interest B. Stalling C. Disbelief D. Impatience 6. When a person looks over the top of his or her eyeglasses, what message are they sending?

A. Contempt B. Distrust C. Scrutiny D. Suspicion 7. What is the impact of nonverbal communication in a face-to-face conversation?

A. 20% B. 40% C. 70% D. 85% 8. Which of the following gestures is/are associated with lying?

A. Talking through fingers B. Eye rub C. Ear rub

D. Lack of direct eye contact E. All of the above Quiz Answer Key 1. (C) The palm to chest gesture indicates sincerity.

2. (D) The thumb under the chin gesture indicates critical judgment and a negative attitude. A good way to get your prospect to drop this gesture is to hand them something.

3. (A) the chin rub gesture indicates decision. When you see this gesture, avoid the temptation to interrupt. If the gestures that follow chin stoking are positive, ask for the order.

4. (C) when someone rubs his or her nose it's an indication that they don't like the subject. When you see this gesture you would be wise to probe with open-ended questions to draw out your customer's concern.

5. (B) when someone touches his or her eyeglasses to their lips it signals that they're stalling or delaying a decision. If they put their glasses back on, it's a buy signal. If they put them away, you have more work to do.

6. (C) When a person looks over his or her eyeglasses it indicates judgment and scrutiny.

7. (C) Research indicates over 70 percent of our communication is achieved nonverbally. In addition, studies show that nonverbal communication has a much greater reliability than the spoken word. Therefore, you would be wise to rely on body language as a more accurate reflection of a person's true feelings.

8. (E) All of the above. The statue of the Three Wise Monkeys accurately depicts the three primary hand-to-face gestures associated with deceit. See no evil, hear no evil and speak no evil.

While you may not be called upon to participate in a presidential debate or manage a baseball team, you need to be able to recognize your prospect's "buy signals." By gaining a working understanding of nonverbal communication, you will be able to reduce sales pressure, build rapport quickly and dramatically increase your sales effectiveness!

Over 90% of a sales dialogue is interpreted through non-verbal communication. This includes facial expressions, physiology, and body language or positioning. But, it also includes your tone of voice and such other factors as your choice of clothing, the car you drive, or the brand of laptop computer you use. Since we tend to react more to what we think a person meant than to what they actually said, when attempting to build rapport, we need to pay just as much attention to our non-verbal signals as we do to our words.

In his book, You Have to Be Believed to Be Heard, renowned speech coach Bert Decker confirms that trust and rapport are developed through positive non-verbal communication. According to Decker, the power of body language is, in fact, so strong that it can literally take less than a minute for trust to be built or eroded based on nonverbal communication alone. Successful sales people have known for a long time that decision makers buy from sales people they like and trust. Positive non verbal communication is therefore, critical to your sales success.

Of course, positive body language doesn't just mean smiling, making eye contact, or assuming an open stance. Researchers say that when you match or mirror the postures, gestures, and tone of voice of whomever you are communicating with, their brain

receives unconscious signals that say, "Hey, you're like me!" Since people trust those who are most like themselves, you need to think of non-verbal rapport as a dance, where you are the follower and whomever you want to influence is the leader.

Now that you know that non-verbal communication is such an important part of Selling, there are a few techniques you can try to strengthen the rapport you have with others.

Remember, the key is to be subtle and discreet. The purpose of mirroring, for example, is not to mimic precisely what a person is doing, such as scratching your left cheek whenever they do. It simply means trying to capture the atmosphere of the interaction, while keeping your actions outside their conscious awareness.

Top 10 Ways to Improve Your Non-Verbal Communication 1. First, keep yourself in check by making sure that your body language, words, and tone all match. Someone recently said to me, "I'm so sorry, you'll be much happier with this solution," and it made me even more upset. How could that be? Shouldn't I be happy that this person was trying to solve my problem? Not in this case, because her words were out of sync with her body language. As she was telling me that she would have the problem fixed, she was standing with her arms tightly crossed against her chest, her hip sticking out sharply to the right, and her eyes rolling. So, what I really heard was, "What a huge pain in the butt you are, I can't believe you're making me go out of my way to find you something new." How effective do you think she was at influencing me towards her new solution?

2. Make eye contact with everyone in the room. Don't stare or glare, but look equally at everyone - and don't forget to blink! It's been said that there are only three degrees of difference between equality (looking squarely at someone), egotism (looking down your nose at someone), and insecurity (looking up at someone with a bowed head). Try this yourself in the mirror to see how clearly even the subtlest difference comes across!

3. Capture the atmosphere and spirit of the conversation, and match the other person's posture. Stand, walk, or sit like them. Pay attention to how they move or remain still.

Then, gradually adapt your positions so that they match or mirror theirs.

4. Match their tone of voice. Vocal tone is comprised of pitch (high or low), speed (fast or slow), and volume (loud or soft). If those around you are speaking in quieter or more boisterous tones, do the same.

5. Be genuinely excited and enthused. People are more easily influenced when they sense that you are enthusiastic, knowledgeable, and interested in what you are sharing.

So smile, and always look confident.

6. Check your attitude problems at the door. Use your positive body language list to reposition your attitude until your mood improves.

7. Know the audience you want to influence, and dress accordingly. If you know they are a suit crowd, wear a suit. If they're a jeans and t-shirt crowd, choose something closer to that style. You'll be surprised how quickly trust is built when you appear to be one of them.

8. Match the handshake of every person you meet. Yes, contrary to popular advice, if you get a "wet fish", then give them a limp handshake right back. Similarly, match a crushing grip with your own strongest hand-masher. This exercise is especially fun in receiving lines, or when greeting many people coming into a meeting!

9. Gesture and motion as others do, or don't. If they fold their arms and lean back, you do it too.

10. Send thank-you cards to everyone you meet, everyone who takes the time to talk to you about themselves or their business, and everyone who helps you with something.

Make sure these cards are handwritten on good stationary, usually the simpler the better, and don't use them for advertising or self-promotion. I've found that, for every six of these notes I send out, I get two inquiries about my business, and one new customer.

Why does it work? Rapport. When you give something to someone, they respond in kind. In the case of a thank-you note, I give them my genuine interest in them or their business, and they respond by giving me their time or commitment.

Remember that it takes less then one minute to make an impression with a decision maker. Make the right impression and you will develop trust and get the sale. Develop the wrong impression and you will lose the business to someone else.

How people are wired Perception Is Everything There are four “Ps” that will enhance your ability to persuade others in both your work and personal life. They are power, positioning, performance, and politeness. And they are all based on perception.

Develop Personal Power The first “P” is power. The more power and influence that a person perceives that you have, whether real or not, the more likely it is that that person will be persuaded by you to do the things you want them to do. For example, if you appear to be a senior executive, or a wealthy person, people will be much more likely to help you and serve you than they would be if you were perceived to be a lower level employee.

Shape their thinking about you The second “P” is positioning. This refers to the way that other people think about you and talk about you when you are not there. Your positioning in the mind and heart of other people largely determines how open they are to being influenced by you.

In everything you do involving other people, you are shaping and influencing their perceptions of you and your positioning in their minds. Think about how you could change the things you say and do so that people think about you in such a way that they are more open to your requests and to helping you achieve your goals.

Be Good At What You Do The third “P” is performance. This refers to your level of competence and expertise in your area. A person who is highly respected for his or her ability to get results is far more persuasive and influential than a person who only does an average job.

Commit to Excellence The perception that people have of your performance capabilities exerts an inordinate influence on how they think and feel about you. You should commit yourself to being the very best in your field. Sometimes, a reputation for being excellent at what you do can be so powerful that it alone can make you an extremely persuasive individual in all of your interactions with the people around you. They will accept your advice, be open to your influence and agree with your requests.

Treat People Politely The fourth “P� of persuasion power is politeness. People do things for two reasons, because they want to and because they have to. When you treat people with kindness, courtesy and respect, you make them want to do things for you. They are motivated to go out of their way to help you solve your problems and accomplish your goals.

Being nice to other people satisfies one of the deepest of all subconscious needs, the need to feel important and respected. Whenever you convey this to another person in your conversation, your attitude and your treatment of that person, he or she will be wide open to being persuaded and influenced by you in almost anything you need.

Perception Is Reality Again, perception is everything. The perception of an individual is his or her reality.

People act on the basis of their perceptions of you. If you change their perceptions, you change the way they think and feel about you, and you change the things that they will do for you.

Action Exercises Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action: 1. First, think continually about the impression you want to make on others and then make sure that everything you do or say is consistent with that perception.

2. Second, be nice to people. Practice the Golden Rule in your interactions with others. Always be polite and make others feel important.

The more people like you, the more open they are to being influenced by you.

How People Think

Learning to let go should be learned before learning to get. Life should be touched, not strangled. You’ve got to relax, let it happen at times, and at others move forward with it. - Ray Bradbury Finding the Truth Customer Sales Strategies It always amazes me how intelligent, wonderful people can so rapidly turn into a stereotype called “The Blurter".

Last year it happened to me at a tradeshow. Someone who was a graphic designer came up to me and started to offer a critique of my marketing materials - without asking me for permission. On and on she went - and inside I was going "Oh honey, this is SO not the way to attract my business."

She didn't ask questions. All she offered was negative feedback. Why? She was trying to convince me to purchase her services instead. And at the end of it - to top it all off when I asked for her business card - she says “Oh - it is at the printer” ...and she gave me a ripped piece of paper with her name and business scribbled on it.

Where did her credibility go in that moment?

You guessed it - right down the tubes.

You Attract More Flies with Honey than Vinegar I love this expression! Remember - you may have the best ideas, the best customer service, the most amazing, life and business changing product on the market - but if you are a Big, Bad Blurter you will only repel business from you.

For example - if you sold weight loss pills and then walked up to an unsuspecting overweight individual and said “You’re fat - you need to buy my diet pills" - I guarantee they wouldn't be looking at you with love and appreciation in their eyes! " Instead of offering "un-asked- for" opinions - provide positive suggestions and ideas instead! As my friend Pat always says to her children: “Don’t tell me. Show me."

Help Your Team Agree on How They’ll Collaborate It’s easy to assume that everyone knows how to work on a team — and on some level this is true. But each member of your team probably has her own understanding of how to collaborate, not to mention individual styles and preferences. If you ask six team members what they think “completing work on time” entails, you’ll probably get six different answers. The same will hold true for your team’s other aspirations. It’s tempting to get going on the task work of a project, skimping on the people aspects of team work. But agreeing on clear rules of conduct allows you to blend individual team members into one cohesive unit.

We each have our own rules of conduct, of course. Yours may tell you that getting to a 9:00 a.m. meeting at 9:03 is just fine. Or that it’s OK to chime in mid-presentation when you’re enthusiastic about an idea. Or that you should remain silent to avoid rocking the boat when you disagree with a decision the majority of people seem to support.

So what happens when you work with someone who thinks that a 9:00 start time really means 8:55? And that interrupting is rude? And that silence signals agreement? One or both of you end up frustrated, angry, or feeling disrespected, and tensions will mount.

Most of us want to do a good job and work well together. But when individuals’ rules of conduct are unspoken, motives are often misinterpreted (“He’s just doing that because he always has to be right” or “She’s trying to hog the spotlight”).

Rules of conduct clarify how you’ll make decisions, keep everyone informed, run meetings, hold one another accountable, assess progress, and continually improve. The purpose of discussing your team’s rules isn’t to determine the one right way of running a team. It’s to agree on the one consistent way you’ll run this particular team.

Rules of conduct: • • • • •

Clarify what others expect of you, the leader.

Make members’ behavior more predictable.

Rein in members’ behavior so you won’t have to play “cop” as often.

Reduce the amount of time you spend rehashing processes, such as how team decisions are made.

Provide criteria for objective feedback and conflict resolution.

Rules of conduct will form and evolve whether you talk about them or not. Without deliberate conversations, you’ll find that unproductive rules crop up as people mimic what you and other influential team members do in practice. If you, the leader, routinely show up five minutes late for meetings, lateness becomes the norm, overriding any notion that punctuality is important.

Rules also evolve according to what you reward. By listening to a team member complain about another member, you reward that behavior—you’re giving the complainer your attention. And that kind of exchange becomes an accepted way of operating, even if the team originally agreed that members should try to resolve conflicts without your intervention.

Reconciling personality and style differences isn’t the only reason to create rules of conduct (though it’s a big one). If you’re leading a cross-unit team, you’ll need to blend the different approaches. If you’ve added new people to a team, you’ll have to take their perspectives into account. If you’re managing two teams that must collaborate to achieve larger goals, you’ll have to establish a third, overarching set of rules. You get the picture: Any time you bring people together, you have to create explicit rules of conduct—or the work will suffer.

Here are a couple of exercises to help your team establish its rules.

Begin with a Boilerplate List Rather than having open-ended discussions about desired conduct—which can take a lot of time and exhaust everyone—find and use an existing framework (a quick Google search yields several and one is included in the HBR Guide to Leading Teams). Ideally it lists basic rules for respect and trust; meeting discussions and decision making; dissent and innovation; feedback and reporting; and conflict resolution.

A framework like this serves as a starting point for establishing your team’s top 10 rules (a manageable number to generate and remember).

You can then reach agreement on them through what’s called the nominal method of decision making:

• • • •

Ask individuals to do their own assessments: Which rules has the team followed from the get-go? Which would they like to add? Which would they rate as their top 10?

At a meeting, post everyone’s lists on the wall.

Have team members walk around, view everyone’s lists, and put checks next to the 10 rules they value the most (with fresh ideas in the room, their picks are likely to differ from their original 10).

The rules with the most votes become the team’s top 10.

This exercise works well for new and existing teams. At a large technology retailer, a team of eight Service Center staffers had worked together for several years, but they had never held team-building conversations. As a result, some counterproductive rules of conduct had emerged: For instance, team members weren’t following up on customer requests. As more and more of those requests went unaddressed, people started pointing fingers.

The team decided it was time to create explicit rules of conduct; members consulted some sample ones they found online and then worked together to come up with the following list:

• • • • • • • •

Bring up problems (regarding tasks or relationships) when they arise. Don’t expect them to go away; instead, name the elephant in the room.

Take ownership and follow through on problems.

Don’t let things fall through the cracks. Even if the next step is someone else’s responsibility, stay in touch until it’s done.

Tell people what you need. Don’t expect them to guess.

When responding to someone’s request, always explain why you are doing what you are doing, especially when you have to say no.

When asking for something, always explain why you are making the request. This allows the person to come up with an alternative solution if what you are asking for isn’t possible.

If you need training or tools in order to be successful, ask for them.

Take risks, but inform key people so that they don’t get blindsided. Analyze the risks, identify the unexpected consequences, and plan for them.

Think Center-wide When your actions diverge from usual practice, always ask, “What impact will this have on the team?”

Start each meeting with individuals sharing “what I did this week that constituted excellent customer service.”

To make these rules stick, the team regularly reviewed them, especially when they experienced backsliding. And when the Service Center added three employees, veteran staffers used orientation as an opportunity to reexamine the rules. They invited the new hires to propose different rules or suggest changes to existing ones.

Even if the makeup of your team doesn’t change, members should periodically reassess its rules. Do this quarterly or each time you close out a project. That keeps the rules relevant as tasks and timelines change. It also helps quash undesirable behaviors that emerge, as the Service Center staffers discovered.

Conduct a Cultural Audit A cultural audit helps newly blended or ongoing teams with new members identify rules of conduct that already exist—whether explicitly established or unofficially evolved. The team can then decide what to keep, modify, discontinue, or add.

A few days before you meet, ask people to think about how they would describe to a new member “the way things are done around here.”

Use the following questions as prompts:

• • • •

What rules were you told explicitly when you joined the team? Did someone take you aside and give you the “inside story”? If so, what did that person say?

What rules do you wish you’d been told about early on?

Has a teammate ever told you, “That’s not how it’s done around here”?

(Violating an unknown rule is often the quickest way to learn!)

What criticisms have you heard about others’ behavior? Name the criticisms but not the people involved.

As the leader, conduct your own audit of the culture. Don’t spend too long on it: Your spontaneous responses are probably the most accurate. When the team meets, ask members to share their perceptions. Take time to highlight differences—they’re often a source of conflict (or at least confusion). As in the boilerplate list exercise, ask members to vote for the top 10 rules they’d like to see the team adopt.

A team I consulted with at a large health care company used the Cultural Audit to identify and resolve a culture clash. The leader, a VP of marketing, had brought together some internal folks and a group of contractors to create a social media campaign. But the two camps had problems gelling. The internal folks complained that the consultants were too lax about details and deadlines, and too informal. Not surprisingly, the contractors saw the company insiders as bureaucratic and stodgy.

When each group fell back on its own home rules, conflicts arose. The Cultural Audit gave the team a nonjudgmental way of recognizing the two sets of rules, which took the heat out of the conversation. Members then negotiated one common set of rules to guide interactions within the blended team.

Rules of conduct should help your team work together smoothly and productively, so keep things simple and practical. Focus on behaviors that will improve collaboration and the quality of the work. Early on, though, it’s usually best to err on the side of more structure (and a few more rules), which you can adjust or relax as the team hits its stride.

For instance, you might start out with a rule about answering e-mails by the end of the day. As that behavior becomes ingrained, you may no longer need that rule to ensure responsiveness.

When teams don’t have clear, specific rules at the outset, they often have to impose structure later as confusion and conflict arise, which takes more time and energy than spelling out desired behaviors in the first place. Frenzy In Front Of A Potential Customer!

Have you ever watched a TV program on Great White sharks? Whenever meat is put into the water - the sharks circle it, and as they approach to attack their "victim", their second set of eye-lids roll up - (sort of looks like something from the Exorcist!) This extra set of lids protects them when their "victim" fights back.

The sharks flail around blindly, chomping the hell out of their prey and when it is over, they need a Pepto Bismol and a cigarette.

As for the prey? You guessed it - not much of them to speak of.

It is hard enough to watch on TV - but it truly is shocking when you see it in business!

Are you pulling a JAWS with your customer?

Here Are Five Signs To Look For: 1) You Don't Ask Questions.

2) You Don't Listen 3) Your Potential Customer Looks They Want to Run 4) You Don't Follow Up 5) You Don't Get Much Business or Repeat Business So whatever happened to the Big, Bad Blurter that I ran into?

Well, she pulled a #4 and didn't follow-up.

The piece of ragged paper went into the garbage.

I continue to work with the same fabulous designers that provide me with amazing results.

Choosing your battles Have you ever been in a conversation with someone who just drones on and on about their opinions, without once stopping to listen to what you might have to say? I don't know about you, but whenever I find myself trapped into a conversation with one of these people, it takes every ounce of my self-restraint not to scream "Who cares?!" In fact, I have yet to meet a customer who enjoys the experience of having a sales person force their opinions and perceptions on them - even (or perhaps especially) when those sales people felt they were only offering their "honest opinion."

Let’s take a closer look at the fine line between offering an honest opinion, and being brutal with the truth.

Don't get me wrong, our opinions are important - to ourselves. Nobody needs to hear all your opinions - especially not your customers! The mistake most sales people make is thinking that it is our opinions and perceptions that influence the customer to buy. The fact is, most successful sales people find that the complete opposite is true: they are far more successful when they don't express their opinions and perceptions, and instead limit their communication entirely to the facts and their emotions.

Making sure you don't cross the line Honesty is stating facts the way we see them, and sharing how we feel about those facts. Brutality is attempting to force our opinions on others, blaming others for what we think they did wrong, or adopting an attitude that just screams "I told you so."

Successfully staying on the right side of this line depends entirely on your ability to get your customers to share with you their emotional reasons for buying your products. How do you do this? By asking them the right questions - questions that will move your prospect from an intellectual position (knowing they have a problem that needs to be solved) to the emotional state of trusting you to solve that problem in a way that will satisfy them.

The right questions, in other words, are ones that will help you to reveal a buyer's true motivations. To help you get the answers to those questions - and close more deals in the process - try the following four steps to building more lasting and profitable customer relationships: 1. Identify the intellectual problem.

Q: What's the biggest challenge you're facing today in the area of X? Q: Our clients tell us that we help them solve problems in the area of X. That's not a problem for you, is it?

Q: What plans have you made to?

2. Develop an intellectual awareness about this problem.

Q: Can you tell me more about it?

Q: Could you be more specific?

Q: How would you improve?

3. Get emotional! Identify the specific business impact of this problem.

Q: How has this problem impacted your organization?

Q: What will happen if this problem continues?

4. Identify the specific personal impact of this problem.

Q: What impact does this problem have on your job / your staff?

Q: What will happen if you don't find a solution to this problem?

Staying on the right side of the line Once you've revealed your prospect's true emotional reasons for buying your products, you're ready to move to the next step in streamlining your communication: learning how to share your emotions during the sales process.

Now, I want to be very clear here: I'm recommending that you describe your emotions, not that you show them - especially if that would mean breaking down into tears or a screaming tirade.

When it comes to expressing your emotions, think of yourself as Tarzan. Tarzan was a man of few words, yet he was always able to express himself in a way that people understood. Keep it simple, and simply report your emotion: I am mad. I am upset. I am stressed.

For example, you might say to a customer: "I noticed that we haven't received the purchase order from your purchasing department yet, and I'm worried that this will delay your implementation." Or: "It's been a couple of weeks since we agreed to talk about your order. If we wait much longer, I'm concerned that they'll be out of stock."

You don't have to go on and on explaining why you're stressed, worried or concerned, or telling them why it's their entire fault. Instead, just state what you notice, eliminate your opinions and then express your emotions in a clear but concise fashion.

Reporting your emotions helps because it lets the prospect understand where you're coming from, which ultimately helps you to get your point across. Because you're not blaming the prospect or customer for making you feel this way, there's nothing for them to debate. Our emotions belong to us.

In particularly difficult situations, focus your conversation on finding solutions rather than bogging things down with a lot of opinion mongering. For example, try something like: "I noticed that you weren't able to get approval for the changes to your order in by the deadline last week, and I'm concerned that we won't be able to ship the product in time to meet your project deadline. One thing I could have done differently is to have followed up with you earlier last week. Perhaps what we should do now is figure out specifically what actions we can take to make sure that your project can still stay on track."

A balancing act Balancing the fine line between honesty and brutality is key to resolving and preventing difficult communication issues. You'll notice that, in the example above, the focus of the conversation is on finding solutions, rather than assigning blame or trying to cover your tracks.

In short, opinions are subjective, and therefore generally not useful in achieving a sale.

While it may seem tempting to bombard others with what you really think in the name of "honesty," a more streamlined approach yields better results - and more commissions!

Salespeople are different based on their values. A higher order value always takes precedence over a lower order value. If you place one value higher than another, and you have to choose between doing one thing and doing another, you will always select the action that is consistent with your higher value. Once you are clear about your order of values, decision making becomes much easier.

What Are Your Real Values?

How can you determine what your values really are? Simple. Just observe your behaviors, especially the things you do when you are under pressure. Your values are always expressed in your actions. It is not what you say, or wish, or hope, or intend that expresses your true values. It is only what you do. If you want to know what your values are at this moment, you can examine your recent past and notice the choices you made when you could have gone one way or another. Your choices, and your subsequent actions, demonstrated to yourself and others what was of greatest value and importance to you.

Compare Different People Here is an example. Imagine you have two people who have the same three values.

The values are family, health and career success. The only difference between these two people is the order of importance that they placed on these values, their priorities.

The first person, Bill, says that, "My family comes first, my health is second and career success is third."

Tom, on the other hand, has the same values, but he says, "Career success comes first for me, then my family, and then my health."

Determine the Difference Would there be a difference in character and personality between these two people?

Would there be a small difference or a large difference? Which of these two people would you like to get to know and become friends with? Would you be able to tell these two people apart in conversation? Which one do you think you would like and trust more?

Values Set People Apart The answers to these questions are clear. The person with the higher values in a better order of priority will invariably be a better person than the person whose values are in a different order. Your choice of values determines the quality of your character. When you select values such as integrity, love, courage, honesty, excellence or responsibility, and you live your life consistent with those values, every hour of every day, you actually become a superior person. It is your values that determine the kind of person you really are. You see...character is what's shown when the public is not looking.

Action Exercises Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action. First, think about how you behave, how you choose, whenever you are under pressure.

Remember, it is only what you do, your actions that tell who you really are. Second, observe how other people around you behave when they are forced to choose. You will only be compatible with people whose values are similar to yours. What are they?

So how do you improve an experienced sales team who believes they don’t need any additional training?

Fewer than 15% of the people entering the insurance, financial planning, or real estate industries will last longer than 3 years, according to industry experts. Of those that make it past the 3 year mark, 20% will barely hang on and 20% will be the top producers. So what about the 60% that want to move closer to the top 20% and keep themselves out of the bottom 20%? Will more sales training be the solution to your quest for greater success?

Well if you can answer yes to these 5 questions more sales training isn’t what you need.

1. Am I able to secure and hold appointments with suspects?

2. When I identify a suspect as a prospect am I able to move the prospect through my sales cycle?

3. Do I know what to do and say to obtain a sale with a prospect?

4. Do I know how to do what I need to do to obtain a sale with a prospect?

5. Do I have enough knowledge in my area of expertise to answer most questions that prospects have?

You’ve probably had all the sales and knowledge training.

Have you noticed that those in the 60% club have been in the business for years? If “old Timers” can’t break out of the 60% club in spite of their experience and knowledge, can you? Do those in the upper 20% just seem to have star power that you don’t have?

What does the top 20% in your industry know that you don’t? What do they do that you don’t do? What skills do they have that you don’t have? What are these elusive things that enable them to work less than you do yet earn more than you do? Why do clients seek them out and walk past you like you’re chopped liver? Why are people attracted to them and want to be associated with them? Let’s look at 3 of their top income producing secrets!

Secret #1 People aren’t born with star power they develop it. In a relational business whether you call it star power or charisma it’s a skill that can be develop. People who are charismatic are that way because they have developed the behavior of making other people feel important.

You make other people feel important by asking questions about them, truly listening to them, and by empathizing with their needs and concerns. Unfortunately we are often too busy thinking about what we need to do to get the results we want to focus on the other person.

Secret # 2 Everyone you meet is a potential prospect. While this statement in and of itself may be true, it is a guaranteed recipe for working harder with fewer rewards.

When you are determined to hold steadfast to the position that you can sell to everyone, you look like everyone else in your industry and you stand out to no one!

Focus helps you to become somebody that other people want to work with.

Secret # 3 Those in the top 20% club don’t sell; they just help their clients buy. If you have a canned presentation and stick to the script you’re just hoping the prospect will follow at the same pace. Arm wrestling and speeding do not develop relationships let alone relationships that put more money in your bank account.

So, you really don’t need more sales training but you do need to learn and follow the 3 secrets. You have the knowledge and skills to be in the top 20% club. You now need to learn, develop, and implement the secrets practiced by the most successful people in your industry. Become charismatic through your genuine interest and concern for others. Be the red jacket in a crowd of gray suits. And most importantly stop selling and start helping people buy.

One of the most significant challenges to improving a team is that most sales professionals believe “experienced = trained.” At the same time experienced reps are rejecting any additional training most still have, and continue to demonstrate, significant gaps in their selling skills.

The goal of this article series is to help you evaluate, design, implement, track and lead your team to increased selling skills and improved effectiveness. Helping your team complete a detailed evaluation of their selling skills (with your feedback and suggestions) is one of the best ways to increase their awareness and to begin leading them through a successful educational change process.

Evaluating…and strengthening the three major selling skill areas

Our twenty question sales evaluation measures your effectiveness in the following selling skill-sets: Operational Selling Skills involve the fundamental skills of day-to-day selling. This includes mastering the steps of a sales call, personality flexibility awareness and solid product and industry knowledge.

Tactical Selling Skills include understanding and controlling the multiple stepped selling processes to win new accounts or to maintain and grow existing accounts.

Strategic Selling Skills involve your ability to communicate your company’s philosophy and competitive market positioning by answering a customer or prospect asking “Why, based on all of the competitive alternatives available to me, do I want to buy from you?” Strategic selling also involves your ability to understand and master each customer’s political environment.

Though all three skills are critical to selling success, most sales reps and their leadership are out of balance. The majority of sales people spend all day reactively responding to the operational demands of their territory, do little longer range planning for either prospects or existing customers and all have a different answer when asked why their company is unique.

Utilizing Your Free Sales Evaluation To Evaluate, Prioritize And Develop Your Team’s Abilities Available free at GreatSalesSkills.com, this twenty question evaluation is aimed at helping your team increase their awareness of their strongest selling skills, as well as the skills that, if improved, could most help increase their selling abilities.

Your team will receive the best results by: 1st – Have each sales person complete an online evaluation of their selling skills.

2nd – As their manager, complete a separate evaluation on each team member evaluating how you see their skills.

3rd – Meet with each team member reviewing and discussing their selling skills evaluation.

Meeting one-on-one with each team member in a positive “looking forward” coaching environment will allow you to openly share answers to each evaluation question discussing any inconsistencies between your two scores. This can then help you develop a personalized list of “next best” skill areas that could provide the greatest payback if improved.

Improving your team’s Operational selling skills

One of the best ways to begin improving your team is to work on their Operational, or foundation selling skills.

A lack of strong operational skills is a major weakness in most, otherwise experienced and successful, salespeople. The majority of professionals learn to sell by trial and error-no training, no coaching, no direction, and just raw experience trying to figure out how to sell and succeed on their own.

But their lack of training and structure leads to selling practices based on hunches and intuition. Intuitive salespeople can be successful, but they tend to lack consistency in their skills. On some calls they are brilliant, but on others they are ineffective or miss accomplishing all they could. A way to increase overall selling success is to build operational selling skills by adding more structure and consistency to daily selling efforts.

You don’t have to be a better sales person than your people in order to help, but you do need to understand all the steps, structures and philosophies of selling so you can coach even your best people to improve.

How to prioritize the selling skills that can best provide the strongest improvement opportunities All selling skills are not created equal. After completing your detailed sales evaluation your next step is to prioritize your answers. You want to select the areas that, if improved, could generate the most profound selling improvements to each member of your team.

Once each team member has identified and selected the skill areas they most want to improve it is time for you, as their leader, to help them develop a positive skill enhancement action plan.

In our next article we will continue our coverage of the sales evaluation by discussing how to evaluate and increase the tactical selling skills of your team.

Want even more ideas? Then read my book “You Can Always Sell More - How to Improve Any Sales Force.� This 300+ page book outlines the entire process described in these articles. Call 800-526-0074 or go to GreatSalesSkills.com I congratulate you on working on your own leadership skills and now being ready to start work strengthening the skills and competitive advantage of your sales team. May you enjoy the process?

Six Secret Sales Weapons If you are involved in sales, and who isn't, you know the terms, techniques and tips for attracting potential customers, creating the desire to buy, gaining trust, closing the deal and maintaining relationship.

Each step in the process is critical to the desired outcome: productive and profitable customer relationships.

Acquiring a new customer costs more than five times as much as keeping an existing customer. Research validates the data, but good old common sense tells you this is true.

While you or your manager is spending time teaching salesmanship, one topic frequently overlooked is business etiquette, an array of skills that can set you and your product or services apart from your competition.

I refer to business etiquette as your "secret sales weapon" because it is not included in most sales training and because it can be the one element that distinguishes you from your competition. A number of ways to use your secret weapon are: 1. Begin before you leave home. Start your day by dressing for the activities on your calendar. If they range from business casual to business professional, you need a change of clothing along the way. It is always easier to take off rather than add on.

For both men and women, wearing a jacket takes business dress up a notch.

Removing it allows you to blend in to a relaxed environment. Dress in a professional manner that meets your customers' expectations.

2. Prepare for the inevitable first impression. Each day is filled with first impressions that will last forever in the memory of those you meet. There is never a day that you can let down your guard regarding your attire, your grooming or your attitude. You have no idea whom you will meet, where and when.

Don't spoil an opportunity.

3. Practice listening skills. Successful sales people are adept at conversation. They love to talk. Many forget that being a good conversationalist means being a good listener as well.

Paying attention to what your customers have to say allows you to understand their needs and gives you the advantage for closing the sale and continuing the relationship.

4. Learn how your customers prefer to communicate. The best way to do this is to ask, "How do you want me to contact you?" Some like e-mail; others opt for the phone; and a surprising number of people favor good old-fashioned face-to-face interaction.

What works for you may turn off your customer?

5. Follow up. After your arranged meeting or chance encounter, reconnect with your customer. Your responsiveness will not only help seal the deal, but insure a continuing relationship. A short phone call or brief e-mail is an immediate affirmation of your agreement. The handwritten thank you note that you send afterwards requires little time, but takes the relationship to a different level.

6. Offer service after the sale. Check to see if your customer is happy with your

product or service. If there is the slightest hint of dissatisfaction, handle it immediately without excuse.

Letting customers know that their satisfaction is your highest priority will have them coming back again and again. Not only that, a contented customer will spread the word almost as fast as the unhappy customer.

Using business etiquette skills as your secret sales weapon won't cost you a dime.

Your only expenditure is the time it will take to listen and learn about your customers, to honor their preferences and to follow up with courtesy and respect.

Are you a knower when selling?

When selling to a prospect do you assume that your products and services will solve their problem? Then, as soon as you can, you jump in and tell your prospect all about your products and services and what they will do for them. You feel that if you tell them enough, they will see how great your products and services are and that they will solve their problem.

Also when your prospect asks you any question, do you always give some sort of answer, even if you have to guess? You don't want them to think you don't know everything about your products and services because you feel you should know everything. You are afraid your image, in the eyes of your prospect, will be negatively impacted if you don't know the answers to their questions.

If you answered yes to either or both of these questions then you are a 'knower' when selling. Unfortunately being a knower when selling has several significant disadvantages as: * a prospect automatically distrusts a knower. A prospect distrusts someone who tells them how they can solve their problem when they don't even know what their problem is. It's the same as you walking into a doctor's office and before you have even sat down in his chair or uttered a word, he hands you a prescription and says "Take this and you'll feel better." Would you trust the doctor or the prescription? * When a prospect senses you are guessing when answering their questions they will distrust the answers you give. Plus they start to distrust everything you have said previously.

If you are a knower when selling, then trust will be low in your sales conversations. When trust is absent, the time and effort it takes to make a sale increases and the likelihood of actually making the sale decreases.

Are you a learner when selling?

When selling do you make no assumptions about whether you can help your prospect solve their problem? You ask lots of questions so you can understand what their problem is and whether you can help them. Only once you know they have a problem you can solve do you then tell them about your products and services.

Also, if your prospect asks you a question for which you don't know, or aren't sure of, the answer do you simply tell them that you don't know? You promise to find out and get back to them (which you of course do). You know that giving your prospect the correct answer is far more important than your knowing everything about your products and services and looking good.

If you answered yes to either or both of these questions then you are a 'learner' when selling. Being a learner when selling has several advantages as: * people automatically tend to trust people who want to understand them and help them solve their problems. * People have more trust in someone who will admit when they don't know something.

Also when someone admits they don't know something, it adds credence to everything that they've said previously.

If you are a learner, then trust will be high in your sales conversations. When trust is high, the time and effort it takes to make a sale decreases and the likelihood of making the sale increases.

If you are not already a learner when selling then here are five simple tips you can apply so you become a learner in a sales conversation.

Tip #1: Bring no assumptions to the sales conversation about whether you can or cannot solve your prospects' problem with your products and services.

Tip #2: Bring wonder to the sales conversation. Just before you have a sales conversation, say to yourself, "I wonder what I am going to learn in this conversation" or "I wonder if I can help this person."

Tip #3: Be curious. Ask lots of questions from a place of genuine and sincere curiosity.

Tip #4: Listen actively so you can learn as much as you can about your prospect.

Tip #5: Learn and implement a sales process which leads with an understanding phase versus a telling phase.

Implement these five simple tips and you'll effortlessly become a learner versus a knower when selling. When you become a learner when selling you'll find the level of trust you have with your prospect will be increased, the time and effort it takes to make a sale will be decreased and you'll be making a lot more sales.

Try it and see.

The Law of Reciprocity means to give and take mutually, to return in kind or even in another kind or degree. The law of reciprocity simply means that when someone gives something you feel an obligation to give back.

Stephen Covey, author of The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People, uses the phrase “emotional bank account” to describe the principle of reciprocity and the corresponding credit-withdrawal process in relationships. Using the metaphor of a financial bank account, the emotional bank account describes the trust that accumulates in a relationship. Like the financial bank account, you must make deposits before you can make withdrawals.

Nonprofit organizations are masters of turning reciprocity into a money-making tool. For my wife and me, we are huge dog lovers. A few years ago, the Denver Dumb Friends League sent us a page of personalized address labels. I thought to myself, “Wow, what a nice gift we just received”. Along with the labels, was a letter with a cute puppy in the corner asking for donations with a return envelope conveniently attached. Over 20% of recipients respond with a contribution to these mailings; even if the labels are never used.

Next time you send out a mailing or a thank you letter to a customer/client, consider including a simple gift such as a pen, book marker or letter opener. The result will be better customer relations and drastically increase sales; especially in the form of repeat business and referrals.

Interviewing prospects using the Law of Reciprocity When interviewing a potential referral source or client, ask questions that will educate about the prospect and their needs. One question that I ask all potential referral sources is this: “What is the biggest challenge in your business that you are currently facing”? The goal is not necessarily to fix their problem, but to provide them with support through an article or referring them to someone who can assist them in their area of challenge. Purposefully look for opportunities to provide information that is helpful to others.

Reciprocity is a basis of trust and a basis for legitimate power. The principle is that others will reciprocate in kind based upon the way you treated them. The world gives you what you give to the world.

Reciprocity isn’t always instantaneous, therefore persistence is vital. Even if you’ve found yourself saying, “I’ve tried that and it doesn’t work”, don’t give up. At the appropriate time you will reap a harvest. By understanding and using the power of reciprocity, you can improve your relationships and avoid mistakes that can permanently damage your relationships. In life and work, you get what you give.

A True Story I had a builder who insisted on using only me to do the financing for his condominium project. A top producing Realtor wrote a contract for himself on one of the units and wanted to use his lender instead of working with me. This agent had a 20 year history with his current lender and didn’t want to chance it with me doing the mortgage financing. The builder insisted that agent use me as the lender and I can tell you, the Realtor® was none too pleased. I called the Realtor® and introduced myself. I asked him to call his lender to find out what terms he would offer the agent to do his loan and I would match it, not being concerned about how much profit I was making. During

the loan process I got to know, learned to like and earn the trust of this agent. I also learned what the challenges were that he was facing in his business.

I put him on my distribution list, sent him books that I felt would help him with the challenges in his business without looking for business in return. It took nearly a year and a half when finally, I received a call that he wanted to start working with me. He is now one of my best referral sources.

Final Thought Does your belief system align with the Law of Reciprocity? Are you willing to give information, ideas, and refer other professionals without the benefit of receiving?

Reciprocity works well in negotiations and relationships. Be the first one to concede and come to the middle. You’ll find that it brings down the other person’s resistance and often miraculously makes them counter with a concession of their own.

I'm sure you'll agree, establishing rapport and trust with your prospects is one of, if not the most important presentation skills you can learn. It's been said many times, people only buy from people they like and trust.

Have you ever had an experience with a salesperson and you have said to yourself "I will never buy anything from that person"? You have probably also had the experience where you hit it off with a salesperson and you would buy just about anything they recommend.

Why? Because you didn't like or trust the first salesperson and you did like and trust the second. Why did you like and trust the second person so much? Because they took the time to establish rapport with you. In simpler terms they probably showed a sincere interest in you and/or were like you.

The last sentence sums up the points I want to discuss in this article.

The first point you should learn in establishing rapport and trust with your prospects is, show a sincere interest in them. How do you do that? The first thing to remember is you have two ears and one mouth, so you should listen twice as much as you talk. Sales really is all about asking the right questions and then shutting your mouth and waiting for the answers. Then ask another question and so on and so on.

The questions you ask initially should be about them, their interests, how many kids they have, what kind of car they drive, where they work, etc. Get to know them like you would a new friend. Find out as much as you can about them, all the time looking for common interests. You see the second point I talked about earlier was people like people who are like them. So find the common interests and expand on them.

Don't take this step lightly. This is very important! People love to talk about themselves.

Don't you agree? So let them talk as long as they like. The more they talk and you show a sincere interest, the better they will like and trust you.

The second way to establish rapport with your prospects quickly is called mirroring and matching. This technique can be accomplished in a couple of different ways.

One way is to pay attention to their communication style. Do they like to get right down to business, tell stories or joke around? Do they talk soft, loud, quick or slow? Do they communicate visually (use words like see, clear, reveal), or auditory (use words like hear, clear as a bell, tune in), kinesthetic (use words like feel; get a handle on, concrete).

The second way is pay attention to how their sitting or standing. Are their legs crossed, arms folded, do they use their hands when they talk, do they lean forward with their arms on the desk.

Then once you understand their communication style, mirror and match them, in other words, do what they do. If they talk loud, then you talk loud. If their visual, use visual words in your communication.

If they cross their legs, then you cross your legs. Now, I'm not talking about right away, use some discretion. Don't immediately cross your legs when they do. Use a slight delay.

This will take some practice. However, in time you can become a master at this.

Once you establish rapport and they like you and trust you, and feel you care about them, then and only then should you begin to ask qualifying questions.

Many salespeople fail to establish rapport and then can't figure out why the prospect won't buy.

Let's face it. We all have those difficult customers to whom we are required to sell. From the demanding, abrasive buyer to the individual who never seems to make a buying decision, we encounter challenging people on a regular basis. Part of the reason this happens is due to the disconnect we have because of conflicting personalities.

Whoever coined the phrase, “It’s a jungle out there!” must have been a sales rep. Why? Because some days you’ll encounter more difficult customers than there are animals in the jungle. When hacking your way through the dense underbrush to get to the sale, the trick is to stay cool, calm and in control.

See if you recognize here some of the creatures you must deal with from time to time.

Then follow my simple instructions for a successful sales safari.

• The Monkey. This quarrelsome and inconsiderate buyer goes out of his way to make trouble. The Monkey likes to fume, argue and misrepresent facts, and particularly enjoys trying to derail your presentation. This type must be treated politely, patiently, and without direct counterargument. Ignore his antics, keep your presentation on track,

and, above all, be firm! When Monkey sees he is not getting to you, Monkey will calm down.

• The Sloth. This ultra-deliberate client is painfully slow-moving, slow-thinking, and indecisive. Speak to the Sloth slowly and clearly, taking up just one point at a time. Do not confuse him with superfluous details or complex concepts. The upside is that once the Sloth truly gets it, he is usually sold!

• The Magpie. A most talkative customer, the Magpie chatters without stopping, often forgets what he started to say, and without prompting, cheerfully launches into his family history, holiday plans, or stories from his college days. Treat this type with tolerance and self-control. Be watchful for opportunities to bring him back. Lead the conversation, be businesslike, and keep him focused on your sales message.

• The Crab. This crabby prospect may be tired, ill, unhappy, nervous, or just chronically irritable. Ever moving sideways, the Crab is contradictory, jumpy, and must be met with patience and calm, soothing voice. Warm smiles coupled with agreement, understanding, and respect, will usually win him over.

• The Peacock. A self-important and snobbish decision-maker, the Peacock fans his tail feathers and looks down his regal beak at you and the goods or services you offer. The Peacock often makes haughty or derisive remarks, which requires rigid politeness and good temper from you. Your best bet is to ignore his preening, posturing, and snooty behavior, and pleasantly move on with your presentation.

• The Cat. The Cat is your most suspicious contact. This animal doubts the sincerity or accuracy of your representations, is cynical about your claims, and demands clear, detailed proof of benefits backed up by hard, documented facts. Your deference and unruffled temper will pay off. Do not be intimidated or insulted by his sometimes rude remarks, which question your product’s worth, or your honesty and sincerity.

• The Rooster. This decisive, smart-aleck customer is cocksure, impatient, and intolerant.

Since the Rooster rules the roost, this type wishes to make his own decision without appearing to yield to a mere salesperson. Rooster should be permitted to strut his way to a decision while you practice good humor, respect, and patience.

• The Dodo. With a room-temperature IQ and the attention span of a three-year-old, the Dodo is the airhead of the sales animal menagerie. Don’t be surprised if, at the end of your presentation, this poor soul is still unclear on exactly what you’re selling, and what he’s supposed to do. Don’t bother starting over, because the Dodo probably doesn’t have the buying authority anyway. Instead, diplomatically locate someone who does.

• The Mouse. We all have met the indecisive or timid prospect who does not know his own mind, and is vague and uncertain. This type needs to have the facts presented confidently and clearly, and his mind literally made up for him. With tact and understanding, give the Mouse what he wants, which is to be led gently by hand to the buying decision.

• The Crow. Here is the stingy, close-to-the-chest buyer, who is interested not so much in benefits and features as in picking your price apart. The loud and repeated cry of this bird is “too high, too high!” Dealing with him calls for concentration on price justification, backed up with solid, documented proof. Stick to your guns to win the Crow’s respect, and his order.

• The Beaver. This super-busy type hardly has time to hear you out. Given to taking— even making—phone calls and conducting other business during your presentation

while continually looking at his watch, this type needs a highly visual and entertaining presentation to grab his interest. Be quick to get to the bottom-line benefits of your product or service. Once sold, show Mr. Busy Beaver where to sign on the dotted line, so you can be on your way and he can get back to being busy.

As you can see, the sales world has its share of wild and wooly creatures. Put on your pith helmet, study the habits of these sometimes cantankerous creatures, and learn how to respond to their individual idiosyncrasies. You’ll have more fun while preserving your sanity and closing more sales.

This article will look at the four key types of people and how to improve your results with each.

Direct Donna. Donna is very direct in her approach. She tends to be forceful and always wants to dominate or control the sales call. Her behavior is aggressive, she points at you while she talks, interrupts your to challenge you, and she seldom cares about hearing the details of your new product or service. Instead, she demands that you "cut to chase" and "tell me the bottom line." Donna is very results- focused and goal-oriented and hates wasting time.

To achieve the best sales results with this individual you need to be more direct and assertive. Tell her at the beginning of the sales call or meeting that you know how busy she is and how valuable her time is. Tell her that you will "get right to the point" and focus your conversation on the results she will achieve by using you product or service.

Resist the temptation to back down if she confronts you because you will lose her respect. To Donna, it is not personal, it's just business.

Lastly, be direct in asking for her business-you don't have to dance around this issue.

Talkative Tim. Tim is a gregarious and outgoing person but very ego-centric. He is often late for your meetings and his constant interruptions and long stories cause your sales

calls to go beyond the scheduled time. He appears to be more concerned with listening to himself talk which is frustrating because you don't always get enough time to discuss your solution.

Relationships are very important to Talkative Tim so invest more time in social conversation. Even if you don't see the point in this, he will appreciate the gesture and will like you more. This person often makes buying decisions on intuition and how he feels about the sales person.

Be careful not to challenge Tim because he will feel rejected and when this happens he will "shut down" and become unresponsive. During your sales presentation, tell him how good your solution will make him look to others in the company or how his status or image will improve. In other words, appeal to his ego.

Steady Eddie. Soft-spoken, Eddie is a "nice" fellow who seems more focused on his team and coworkers than on his personal results. He is very quiet compared to some of your other prospects and can be difficult to read. But most frustrating is his reluctance to make a buying decision. Eddie's mantra seems to be "I'm still thinking about but thanks for following up."

Structure and security is important to these people and it is difficult for Eddie to make changes. He often contemplates how the decision will affect other people within the organization. That means you need to slow down the sales process, demonstrate how your solution will benefit the team, and remove as much risk from the decision-making process as possible. Soften your voice and make sure your sales presentation flows in a logical manner. Use words like "fair" "logical" and "your team" in your presentation.

Analytical Alice. She reads every point and specification about your product or service and regardless of how much information you give Alice, she always wants more, including written guarantees and back up documentation. She is very difficult to read and it is extremely difficult to get her engaged in an open conversation because personal feelings and emotions do not enter the picture when Alice makes a decision.

Whenever possible, give Alice a written, bullet-point agenda of your meetingbeforehand. Ideally, email it to her a few days in advance so she can prepare herself.

Make sure it is completely free of typos, spelling mistakes and punctuation errors. When you meet, follow the agenda in perfect order and if you make any type of claim, have supporting documentation available for her to read.

While the approach to use with each of these people may not make sense to you or seem completely rational, it is critical to recognize that how you naturally and instinctively sell may not be the best way to get results with someone else. Modifying your approach and style, even briefly, will help you better connect with your customers and prospects which means you will generate better sales.

Look, no one likes rejection. We're all human with varying degrees of epidermal thickness, but it's easier to be liked and to like others in return. (There are those who

rejoice in the victimhood of not being liked or the bullying of not liking, but those are pathologies and I'm not wearing my therapeutic hat today.)

So why do some of us tolerate and overcome rejection while others are devastated and develop the vapors, especially when so many of us reading this are salespeople, whose very milieu is rejection?

I'm Resilient. Don't tell me I'm not. I Am! Forget the first defense of the skin; rejection can cut to the bone if we allow it to drill away. Why do so many of us allow it? If you'll agree for a nanosecond that every salesperson dislikes rejection, why do some shrug it off so well?

The answers I've found in hiring, managing, developing, firing, and consulting about salespeople are: • Excellent sales people realize it's about the products and service, and not them.

They may have represented the product poorly and answered questions about the services ineptly, but nonetheless, the opposition is about what's being sold, not the seller. This ability to distinguish between the purveyor and the purveyed I call Separation Clarity.

• Resilient people have bigger fish to fry. That is, they live in a holistic universe where the next sale is not the end of the world. They incorporate their entire lives into their happiness and perspective. Being rejected by a buyer is small potatoes so long as the preponderance of one's life is positive and fulfilling. I call this comprehensive view of one's life Big Picture Perspective.

• Successful salespeople have support networks. They do not rely on random others' feedback, or approval, or validation, or even communication. They know who they are and are bolstered by their loved ones, colleagues, friends, and acquaintances.

Personally, I've seen very few top salespeople who don't have great loves in their life, or close friends, or family of some kind. Thus, this is the Appropriate Love Factor. You don't need your prospect, client, or buyer to love you.

• Finally, the best people I've seen learn continually from victories and defeats, but they build on strengths. They find out what they are really good at (e.g., finding others' self-interest, or using referrals, or selling repeat business) and they exploit it. They don't go home and listen to motivational tapes ever time they hit an obstacle, and bemoan their lack of talent. Learning and growing strength I call Mental Fitness.

Ignoring Rejection Using Separation Clarity, Big Picture Perspective, Appropriate Love, and Mental Fitness can help you to mitigate and ignore rejection. And the way you deal with rejection is key to your success. (Don't forget that throughout the eons, predators are successful only 10 percent of the time, so ten hunts are required to feed the Raptor or Hyena

family.)

You can't avoid rejection, if you could, every marriage proposal would be accepted and, apparently, too many are being accepted as it is.

When I was a kid playing in the schoolyard, I was furious and dejected if I was rejected when the captains chose their teams for the games that day. I didn't even like being chosen near the end.

But in college, when strangers who didn't know me chose not to choose me during gym class (an artifact of a bygone era when America weighed about a trillion tons less because it wasn't considered discriminatory to force people to exercise), I could have cared less. It was their loss, which I ultimately proved when the captain who chose us dregs found out I was a "star."

Buyers are supposed to buy. When they don't, even though I offer such incredible value, it's their loss, just like those ignorant team captains. You can make a case that I should have showcased my talents more or argued for a better selection, but rejection happens.

There's no sense letting rejection become uber-rejection.

Uh, Oh, I'm Crushed Being rejected by an uninformed or foolish buyer is one thing, but allowing that to create a doom's loop cycle where you expect to be constantly rejected is something else again. That is rejection on steroids, and you ought to be investigated by Congress.

Generalizing rejection is anathema to the sales profession. You have to compartmentalize rejection, box it up, and throw it off the train. (The coyotes will eventually devour it since I've never met a coyote who fears rejection.)

The buyer isn't always right. The circumstances are sometimes against you.

Occasionally, you'll have a bad day. Sometimes, the competition will get there first.

Infrequently, the stars are in the wrong position.

Accept that, and get on with your life. You can't control those variables; you can only do your best with what you have. We grow by building on strength, not by correcting weaknesses.

You are only rejected if you think you are. What do you think?

How many sales opportunities have you lost to competitors who seemed to have the inside track? It’s likely the buyer purchased from their Emotional Favorite, sometimes called their ‘Go To’ person.

Selling goes beyond communicating the value of your products and services. Selling is also about communicating the value of doing business with you. It is about connecting with buyers and becoming their Emotional Favorite aka ‘Go To’ person.

Success in sales requires three things: 1) A viable product or service that addresses a buyer’s need 2) Credibility – so buyers see minimal risk in doing business with you 3) Timing – being in front of the right buyer at the right time Some sales people claim that in sales timing is everything; experienced sales professionals know timing is the ONLY thing.

There are a plethora of credible businesses with viable products and services. To be truly successful at selling you need timing - to be the first or second person motivated buyers talk to when they want something.

There are three simple ways to get timing: 1) Sheer numbers – if you contact enough buyers, you’ll eventually find opportunities 2) Referrals – someone tells you the buyer has a need for your product or service 3) You become a buyer’s Emotional Favorite – motivated buyers call you first The Value of Being First Being one of the first suppliers in front of buyers at the time they need what you sell is key to getting the business. The reason is once the buyer begins to shape a solution around a vendor’s product or service, they become emotionally tied to that solution.

Buyers are busy people and they tend to make emotional decisions, move on to the next problem, and then rationalize their decisions afterwards.

Who Is The Emotional Favorite?

The Emotional Favorite is the first person a buyer calls, regardless of what they need.

Think about the last time you purchased a product or service. When you picked up the phone, did you call the person who helped you in the past? The person who adds value to your business or your career every time you ask for their assistance? Chances are you did. The fact of the matter is most people do.

It used to be that people bought from those they know, like, and trust. To be successful in sales today, you need to go one step further and connect with buyers to become the person the buyer knows, likes, trusts…and wants to see succeed – Their Emotional Favorite.

Becoming the Emotional Favorite So, if being the Emotional Favorite means being the person a buyer wants to see succeed, how do you create this kind of relationship? Start by asking questions about the buyer when you meet for the very first time and at the end of EVERY sales call.

Think about the last time you encountered a ‘stereotypical’ sales person, the one who immediately launches into a sales pitch. How did you react? After a minute or two, did your eyes glaze over? As the sales person drones on, you stop listening waiting for an opportunity to end the conversation. Ultimately, that sales person falls to the bottom of the list of people you call when you need something. Not where you want to be if you’re looking to become the buyer’s Emotional Favorite.

Asking the Right Questions

Obviously, you’re not going to start with ‘Hi, I’m Craig. What’s your greatest challenge?’ Start with open-ended questions: Ask about how the latest government policy changes, or shifts in technology have impacted their business. Relate their business to your other industry contacts and share some of your own insights. Then you can ask about their greatest challenges and you will likely get the answers you are looking for.

Be sure to frame your questions outside your existing sales professional to buyer relationship because by default, the buyer will answer in terms of your products or services. Start with “Let’s forget about what I do for ABC Company for a minute” and ask: • What is the biggest issue you have that you just can’t get to? Or, • what is the one thing you are looking for but can’t seem to find? Or, • what issue have you tried to solve but can’t find a satisfactory solution to?

We hear mostly what we want to hear, not what the other person is trying to communicate to us. Many conflicts can be resolved easily if we learn how to listen.

Learn to Listen Well A vital key to sales success is listening. The ability to listen well is absolutely indispensable for success in all human relationships. The ability to be a good listener in a sales conversation is the foundation of the new model of selling. It leads to easier sales, higher earnings and greater enjoyment from the sales profession.

Being a Good Talker is not enough Many salespeople have been brought up with the idea that, in order to be good at your profession, you must be a glad-hander and a good talker. You have even heard people say, "You have the 'gift of the gab'; you should be in sales!"

Focus On the Other Person Nothing could be further from the truth. As many as seventy five percent of all top salespeople are defined as introverts on psychological tests. They are very easy going and other-centered. They would much rather listen than talk. They are very interested in the thoughts and feelings of other people and they are quite comfortable sitting and listening to their prospects. They would much rather listen than talk in a sales situation. Poor salespeople dominate the talking, but top salespeople dominate the listening.

Practice "White Magic" With Everyone Listening has even been called "white magic." It is too rarely engaged in by business people. When a salesperson develops a reputation for being an excellent listener, prospects and customers feel comfortable and secure in his or her presence. They buy more readily, and more often.

Practice the 70/30 Rule You've heard it said that God gave man two ears and one mouth, and he is supposed to use them in that proportion.

Top salespeople practice the "70/30 rule." They talk and ask questions 30 percent or less of the time while they listen intently to their customers 70 percent or more of the time.

They use their ears and mouth in the right ratio.

Action Exercises INSTINCT - A powerful meditation created to resonate, strengthen and re-align the base energy center. This meditation is all about power, material survival and balance. It is our survival chakra where we hold primitive fears about money, food, shelter, etc. Working with this meditation will calm the endocrine, nervous system thereby reducing tension in the spine, kidneys and adrenals. A superb choice for people struggling with money and relationship issues, feelings of being stuck, depression, fear of success or failure, low selfesteem, feelings of not belonging, wishing you were dead, low in energy and often feeling weak, tired and sick.

Here are two things you can do immediately to put these ideas into action.

First, resolve today that, from now on, you are going to dominate the listening in every sales conversation. Become comfortable with silence.

Second, practice the 70/30 rule in every sales conversation. Listen 70% of the time and only talk and ask questions 30% of the time.

The Catch The catch is that listening is the forgotten art. We are so busy making sure that people hear what we have to say that we forget to listen.

The first indication I had that my education had a hole in it occurred in the Marine Corps. A kindly colonel gave me a bit of advice. "Lieutenant," he said, "you need to learn how to listen." "What?" I replied. Obviously it was going to take more than his counsel to get the point across.

Luckily for me, my next escapade was tailor made. Dun & Bradstreet hired me as a salesman in an enterprise based upon a new technology called data processing. D&B had just computerized its entire data base of credit information on millions of companies and was now selling information for marketing purposes.

For example, if your company sold ice to Eskimos, D&B could give you a printout of all the Eskimo companies in your market area, with pertinent information such as the number of Eskimos in each company and the names of key decision-making Eskimos.

This was cutting-edge stuff back in 1968.

Well, my sales territory was Brooklyn in New York -- then Manhattan. This was the toughest place to try selling door-to-door, which is what I was being under-paid to do. I learned very quickly that the key to success in selling -- as it is in negotiating -- is keeping your mouth shut and listening to what people have to say.

I discovered that my sales prospects would tell me everything I needed to know in order to make the sale -- if I just kept my mouth shut long enough. If I tried to make a flowery presentation, I would be thrown out. But if I let them tell me what their problems were, they would buy anything from me -- even ice.

Staying In Shape It turns out that listening is not a difficult art to master. In fact, it's quite simple. It's similar to what I go through in order to keep physically fit. The easy part of staying in shape is doing all the exercises. The hard part is getting to the class or gym on a regular basis.

The excuses I come up with for not going are amazing. Once I get to the school or health club, I'm home free.

Learning to listen is the same. The hard part -- the equivalent of "getting to the gym" -- is shutting up. If you can train yourself to keep your mouth shut most of the time, you will be a great listener and a great negotiator.

Having a difficult conversation How we treat one another matters — that is just good, common sense. All human beings want to be respected, listened to and valued. These three universal needs are the key to authentic communication. Yet, these needs are often overlooked in the workplace. In fact, research confirms that rudeness and cruel behavior are on the rise, particularly at work. The physical costs of a toxic workplace are immense. Poor behavior destroys employee relationships, diminishes morale and hurts the bottom line. When you focus on the human side of business — mainly, support the emotional needs of employees — you have an enormous advantage over more hot-headed counterparts.

Prepare yourself for tough, deep-seated conflict with these tips to help keep your cool: 1. Allow for silence to occur. Take a moment to collect your thoughts — step back and survey the situation. Throughout the discussion, take the time to wait until the other person has finished talking and avoid interrupting.

2. Know when and how to de-escalate things. If you find yourself caught in the moment, buy yourself some time and ask more questions such as, "Tell me more about that…" Take a few deep breaths, and regain your composure.

3. Clarify and summarize your understanding. You won't fix a problem by judging or making assumptions. Instead, pause and seek to understand the other side.

Paraphrase your understanding of the situation from the other person’s perspective to ensure clarity.

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Be vulnerable. Vulnerability is not a sign of weakness — but a sure path to more meaningful conversations and profound connections. Share accounts or stories that will help illustrate your view and allow your feelings about the situation to emerge.

Remain on the same side of the fence. Be willing to own your part in the conflict.

Seek an outcome that will benefit both sides. Offer open, honest feedback and remember that you share the same needs.

Show compassion. View the other person through the eyes of compassion and cooperation. This simple act can move mountains — and save a lot of time.

When you hold the space for the other person in a positive light, you'll be better equipped to establish a more constructive outcome.

Apologize where necessary. If need be, take responsibility for your part in a conflict or discussion and apologize sincerely.

Check your ego at the door. As long as there is a victim or a villain there will be no peace. Be mindful of any hidden personal agendas and opt to inspire, influence and collaborate, instead of "win" at all cost.

Employ the Three Golden Rules of Engagement. All authentic communication involves the following three vital points that will help set the tone of your conversation and lead to a successful resolution.

• Listen with empathy • Involve the person (ask their opinion, help, ideas, etc.)

• Affirm or enhance mutual self-esteem

Intuitively Rehearse If you're going into a challenging conversation with someone, spend time carefully considering how the person may respond. List possible objections and points of contention. Come up with a response for each of these points so that you don't lose your cool and are not struggling to make a point. Many people find it helpful to practice having the conversation with a colleague or friend. Finally, visualize the conversation going exactly as you planned.

We will come to the decision very early on in the process that we would collaborate rather than compete. Our mutual agreement is to achieve the best outcome for our situation and hold a place of respect for one another. Throughout the process, our mantra is, "I need what you need, and we are both in this together." This may not be a common intention when resolving conflict, particularly when someone has felt deceived or on the losing end of a situation. However, there are effective methods that you can employ to resolve any form of dispute.

I have come to realize that I have to face the situation grounded in compromise and respect.

The truth is, there are no victors in a conflict. In a personal estrangement, one or both parties may feel wounded and victimized. You might find it difficult to effectively initiate a conversation when there is a problem to be solved. Or perhaps you simply avoid addressing the situation, leading to resentment and ill will.

Facing a conflict in business commonly means competition--"I am going to win, and you are going to lose" or "I am right and you are wrong." Many people tend to jump in via attack-mode, escalating the situation and damaging the relationship.

Who can come out of either of those scenarios genuinely feeling like a winner?

Learning how to handle conflict is a crucial life skill that can be a challenge to master.

We can all benefit from learning the art of heart-centered communication--which is simply, authentic communication that comes from a place of respect for self and others. When a heart-centered approach to conflict resolution is engaged, more often than not, it can make the difference between positive and negative outcomes.

Here are some takeaways to help resolve any conflict: Live by the 3 Golden Rules of Engagement In any dialogue, there are two fundamental needs that must be met--the ego need and the practical need. The ego needs are: to be listened to, valued, appreciated, empathized with, involved, and empowered. The practical need refers to the obvious: the reason for having the discussion and focuses on the conflict at hand. To address both needs, employ the 3 Golden Rules of Engagement: Listen and respond with empathy.

Be involved. Ask for the other person's opinions, ideas and thoughts.

Maintain and affirm a sense of pride and self-esteem.

I am not saying it is always easy--and there are times when we could easily fall into a black hole of resentment and anger which would only cause further suffering, ultimately prolonging the process. So make a conscious commitment to treat each other fairly and deferentially.

There will inevitably be bumps along the way but in any conflict both parties must agree ahead of time to work out their differences from a place of compassion. This may seem like a tall order but here is what you can do: Take personal responsibility and accountability for your part in the situation.

You cannot control what anyone else says or does, but you can control what you do and say. Admit to your part in the conflict by being straightforward and strive to be conciliatory. Remember to temper your interactions with respect.

Go for the win--on both sides.

Conflict resolution is often tainted by an inequitable outcome. Often, one party feels they must compromise to attain a working solution. Although this is positive and can result in a favorable outcome, it often leaves the accommodating party dissatisfied and feeling like they have "lost." The ideal situation is when both parties feel they have resolved the issue and have accomplished a "win." A problem will never be solved until both parties involved come to a place of full collaboration--thus keeping the relationship intact--or even improving it.

Remember to be grateful every day.

Conflicts can bring out the darker side of our character. It may sound cliché but the simple practice of gratitude has more power than you may think. When working through any conflict it can be very beneficial to create a daily gratitude list to help keep you in a state of positivity.

Look for the lessons.

Conflict is part of life--it is something we all try to avoid but at some point we all have to deal with it. Reflect on the lessons learned in each situation so that you do not become disillusioned by the experience, and you are able to move forward. In retrospect, you may discover that the conflict, struggle or issue you were compelled to face was a pivotal life lesson.

The secret to successful conflict resolution is simple. Remember the basic universal needs and treat others as you would like to be treated.

How to stop absorbing other people’s negative energy Empathy is the ability to recognize and feel other people’s emotions. Sympathy is feeling compassion for other people. Often times to be an “empath” means that you are absorbing much of the pain and suffering in your environment, which can sacrifice your won ability to function at a high level.

If you have ever been in a room with a negative person, you know just how toxic their energy can be. Learning to stop absorbing other people’s energies is such a great spiritual skill to have. Here are five ways to stop absorbing other people’s energy.

1) Remember, you can’t please everyone If someone is bullying you, complaining about you, or dissing you, do not make it your mission to try to convince that person to like you. This will only suck you deeper into that energy field and will make you energetically dependent on their opinion of you.

Not everyone is going to like you. Everyone on earth is living here for a different purpose. By loving yourself first, you will create a forcefield around other peoples opinions that will protect you from being so drained by their opinions.

Also remember, you can’t change everyone. Don’t make it your mission to fix them in that moment either. Sometimes, the best thing you can do is not try to change them but to just not feed the energy that they are projecting at you.

2) Be careful who you invite into your life Your body, mind and direct environment is your temple. Who are you inviting in?

Is it an open invitation? Do people even have to wipe their feet clean before walking around or is it ok if they drag mud onto your soul? In Brazil there is a slang word called folgado. The direct meaning is “loose” or “lazy” but it really means “freeloader”. There is not exact english equivalent though because it is a mentality even more than a lifestyle.

If you give a person a piece of bread one day, they will be asking for the loaf the next. If you let someone stay for a weekend, they will then try to stay the week (or two!). I once thought my wife was cold and mean spirited towards some of our neighbors. Once I realized she was merely respecting herself and her home, I valued her direction and adopted it as my own.

It is great to be generous but there is a fine line to work with so you are not being trampled on, thus disabling you from helping those who truly need it. Learn to say “no” and to be ok with that.

3) Stop paying attention A parasite needs a host to survive. When you pay attention to somebody else, you are giving them energy. Whatever you focus on grows and energy vampires will steal your thoughts – decreasing your energy levels. Some people will dump their energy onto you and then drive on to the next pit stop. A friendly ear can be a wonderful thing but there is, again, a line that does not need to be crossed.

Perhaps you’ve found yourself being the source for a person to relay their frustrations at work, a relationship or even successful accomplishments. All of these emotions can drain you in various ways and cause you to measure your own life in ways that are not productive.

Love yourself enough to tune them out, tell them to stop, or tell them you can’t handle it right now. It’s not mean of you to reject their toxic energy.

4) Breathe in nature Go into nature, meditate, relax and breathe. Purify the water within yourself, exercise and float easy. Like a butterfly, float gently but move fast. Breathing increases the bloodflow circulation around the body and will help prevent to absorb energy from those around you. Walk with confidence, keep your head up and don’t allow anyone to make you feel inferior. A caterpillar eats everything around it and becomes fat, immobile. It must first become light in order to fly.

5) Take 100% responsibility for your thoughts and emotions How you feel is 100% your own responsibility. The universe is sending people into your life to test us. The perception we have of ourselves is greater than the perception others have of us. You are not a victim, nobody has power over you.

Consider how your thoughts or expectations may have manifested the situation that is bothering you. What if the answer lies within your level of patience, irritability, or compassion? Unless we take the time to look, we subconsciously affirm our own victimization to the world around us.

Once you hold yourself accountable and responsible for the way you choose to respond to something, you connect with yourself on a deeper level. When you

are connected to yourself on a deeper level, you don’t get knocked off your center as easily.

Place yourself in situations that boost your own energies. Does this person make you feel good? Do you make that person feel good? You are worthy of a brilliant experience and it is time to realize that fact. Learning to protect yourself against other people’s energies starts with self-love. Remember that you are worth of happiness and peace, it’s ok to say no. and you are the author of your own energetic state.

Hope this helps!

Listening Tips Here are some suggestions for developing your listening skills: • Develop the desire to listen. You must accept the fact that listening to others is your strongest weapon. Given the opportunity, the other person will tell you everything you need to know. If this doesn't create desire, I don't know what will.

• Always let the other person do most of the talking. This is a simple matter of mathematics. I suggest a 70/30 rule. You listen 70% of the time and you talk 30% of the time.

• Don’t interrupt. There is always the temptation to interrupt so you can tell the other person something you think is vitally important. It isn't, so don't. When you are about to speak, ask yourself if it is really necessary.

• Learn active listening. It's not enough that you're listening to someone -- you want to be sure that they know you're listening. Active listening is the art of communicating to the other person that you're hearing their every word.

• Ask for clarification if needed. This will clear up any misunderstanding you have.

• Get used to 'listening' for nonverbal messages -- body language. The other person may be communicating with you via body language. You need to decode the message.

• Ask a question...then shut up. This is a foolproof way to listen. Think of yourself as an interviewer -- Barbara Walters! She listens and questions -- so should you.

Tips for Asking Questions Once you have learned how to keep yourself from speaking, the art of asking questions is the shortcut to effective listening. Here are some tips for asking questions: • Ask open-ended questions. Questions that can't be answered with a simple yes or no. "How could we do this?" "What do you think?" Your objective is to get them to talk as much as possible.

• Don’t ask questions that put them on the defensive. For example, "Why?" is intimidating. Don't ask "why?" Ask "how come?"

• Ask "What if?” What if we did it this way?

• Ask for their advice. "What would you suggest we do to resolve this?" Everyone loves to be asked for advice.

• Offer alternatives. "Which way would you prefer?" This demonstrates your respect for the other person.

• Ask about their feelings. "How do you feel about this?" People love to have their feelings validated.

• Repeat back what they said. "Let me be sure I understand what you're saying.

You're saying that...?" This technique will prevent misunderstandings and convince them that you really are listening.

Being a Detective Well, there it is. Now all you need to do is practice. If you want to watch a role model for all of this, turn on a rerun of a Columbo episode. He's my role-model. I advise all my negotiators to think of themselves as detectives. Once heard an interview with a police detective that directly relates to sales. The detective was talking about various interrogation techniques, and he said something that I thought was brilliant and totally applies to the importance of listening while selling over the phone.

The detective said that when you ask a question you should never say or do anything that might cause your subject (prospect) to stop talking.

In other words, you listen. With full attention, and you don't interrupt. You don't ask other questions. You just keep listening even when you think they're done.

In sales, and especially in inside sales where you don't have all those visual cues, listening is the most important thing you can learn how to do.

Here are some techniques and tips you can begin using today to improve your listening: #1: Use a script. One of the biggest reasons sales reps don't listen is because they're too busy thinking about what they're going to say next.

This is especially dangerous to do during the qualification stage when your prospect is revealing why they will and why they won't buy.

You must script your questions!

By using a script, you'll be able to really listen and so pay full attention to what your prospect is saying. #2: Don't interrupt. I can't tell you how many times I hear sales reps interrupting their prospects while they're still talking. Not only is this rude and disrespectful, but it shows they're really not listening.

When I was new to the phones, in order to learn how to listen I had to literally put my hand over the mouthpiece and hold it above my head! That way I could babble on and blurt out whenever I wanted to say, all the while allowing my prospect to still talk.

It was hard at first, but boy did it pay off. By not interrupting, I often heard my prospect tell me exactly what I needed to do or say to sell them.

Get in the habit of catching yourself interrupting your prospects and start using the mute button on your phone. You'll be amazed by what they are trying to say. #3: Allow some space after you think your prospect is done talking. Many times sales reps think that pauses mean that their prospect is actually done talking. Not so! I hear it over and over. Again, the reps can't wait to start talking so they will jump in as soon as their prospect takes a breath. Stop it!

A good habit to get into is to pause a full 3 seconds after you think your prospect is done speaking—that’s 1001, 1002, 1003, before you say something. Again, you'll be amazed by how often they will fill the space—and often reveal crucial information you'll need to make the sale. #4: Use “Oh,” Uh huh,” and “What do you mean?” If you haven't heard the information you need to make the sale, use one of the above techniques to keep your prospect talking.

Remember—they hold the key as to why they'll buy, and you will learn this only if they're talking and you are listening.

#5: Listen to your own recordings. You are recording yourself, are you?

I'll write more about this in another tip, but you must listen to yourself closing a sale to know how and where you need to improve.

Nothing brings this home more than hearing yourself talk over people, interrupt, or just plain miss what they are saying. If you're not recording yourself go to Radio Shack tonight and invest $50 in a recorder. It'll be one of the best investments you'll ever make.

So there you have it -- some simple yet powerful ways to improve your listening skills.

Just remember above all, don't do or say anything that might cause your prospect to stop talking! Keep listening!

Now shut up and listen! When the buyer stops talking, wait 6 seconds and listen to what they tell you next. First they’ll tell you about the problem. Then, if you don’t interrupt them, they will then tell you how the problem impacts them and the rest of their organization.

Now you have the enough information to connect the buyer with a solution and if it’s not available through you perhaps you know a colleague who can solve the problem.

What Are the Benefits of Connecting Buyers to Solutions?

• You develop superior customer relationships • you differentiate yourself from your competition • you get more referrals from prospects and existing customers • you become the buyer’s Emotional Favorite aka ‘Go To’ person • you sell more by getting called first when buyers want what you sell Conclusion Most customers don’t tell you of needs they think are unrelated to what you sell. When you ask the right questions, you learn of opportunities to add value to buyers, become their Emotional Favorite, and sell more, by getting called first when they want what you sell.

Did you ever buy anything from someone you didn't trust? In all likelihood, probably not.

Trust is an important issue when it comes to selling. It doesn't matter what you sell or to whom. It makes no difference if you sell business-to-consumer, B2B, or in a retail setting.

Trust is the foundation of virtually every sale.

Yet, it never ceases to amaze me how many sales people will stretch the truth, mislead the customer, misrepresent their company, product, or service, or even deliberately lie in order to capture a sale. While this will certainly work once or twice, most people will seldom fall for this approach again.

In the long run, you might win the battle but you will lose the war. So how can you earn a person's trust? Here are three core concepts that will help you accomplish this.

1. Do WHAT you say you will do, WHEN you say you will do it. Many sales people forget this basic fundamental. If you make a promise to a client, keep it. If you say you will do something, make sure you follow through. This more than anything else will demonstrate that you are trustworthy and someone they can count on. And in business, that goes a long way.

2. Be on time for your appointments. Regardless of how long you have worked with a particular customer, make sure you show up on time for your meeting. If, for some unforeseen reason you are going to be late, call. Your clients are busyshow them that you respect their time.

3. Be yourself. How you behave and interact with your clients and customers should not be "an act." These may sound like pretty simple concepts. However, I can guarantee that many of your competitors are NOT executing them on a regular basis. That means you can gain a competitive edge just by following these three concepts. But there's more to it than that.

Ultimately, everything you do influences the level of trust you develop with your customers and prospects. Let's look at a few more examples: ◊ How you treat clients' employees, including receptionists and mail-room staff. Many sales people are rude and treat non-management employees with disdain because they are not involved in the decision- making process. However, behavior like this seldom goes unnoticed. Regardless of whom you interact with, you should treat them with respect and dignity. ◊ The speed with which you respond to clients and prospects. If you delay in answering a prospect's request or question you lose the opportunity to gain their trust. I have experienced this in my own business countless times when I have contacted a company for information and they have been slow in responding. In my mind, if you don't respond quickly BEFORE I am a customer, what will happen once you get my business? ◊ Making outlandish claims about your product or service. Even when they know better, many sales people exaggerate the capabilities of their products. In most cases, their intent is completely harmless. However, if your product or service fails to meet your

customer's expectations, anything you tell them in the future will be questioned and they may perceive you as someone who will say anything to capture a sale. ◊ Pushing unwanted services. While I'm a believer of capitalizing on every sales opportunity, I believe that it is unethical to try and sell a person something that he or she doesn't need or want. This approach shows your customer that you are concerned only with getting as many sales as possible. While you may end up selling more, in the long run you may harm your reputation. ◊ Listening carefully to your customer. Everyone wants to be heard and one of the easiest ways to earn your customer's trust is to demonstrate that you listened to them.

You can do this through the use of verbal prompters, good eye contact, body language such as nodding, and summarizing what they tell you.

Trust is as important now as it was two or three decades ago. In fact, it may be even more critical given today's highly-competitive business world. I recall a sales coach once saying, "The only thing you have is your reputation." It doesn't matter what you sell or to whom, if you tarnish your reputation, you will not be as successful as you could be.

I also remember hearing someone else say, "If you always tell the truth, you never have to remember what you said."

Lastly, it's not always what you say. Actions speak louder than words and people will often judge your trust worthiness by what you do and how you do it. What are you doing to create a high level of trust with your customers and prospects?

Understanding this success principle is recognizing that no one achieves success without other people. One way or another you will need other people to achieve success. Getting the help of other people requires that those people buy you.

It doesn’t matter if you’re interviewing for a job, asking for someone's vote, or selling a service to someone; each circumstance requires other people buying you.

Even though you may cringe at the thought of being a sales person realize everyone is a sales person and so are you, your success depends on your ability to do it well.

You’ve been selling since you were a little kid. Remember how you would sell your Mom and Dad on the idea of buying you something? You were persistent and determined.

At the time you didn’t understand you were selling and your parents discouraged this behavior.

Yet if you ever want to succeed at anything you have to be able to sell yourself. Your ability to sell yourself begins with the people you want to sell to, knowing who you are. Don’t you like to buy things from people you know rather than a complete stranger? Most people do. Being able to utilize this success principle starts with helping the people you want to buy from you to know you.

Your parents had to love you; other people don’t have to even like you.

Yet you need people to like you in order for them to buy you. People like people who help them better than anyone else. How can you help the people who know you, and that you want to work with? This help must be given with no strings attached, or your simply manipulating people. You don’t like to be manipulated and neither does anyone else. When you try to manipulate people you blow your chances for having people trust you and that is the next key element in this success principle.

People like to buy from people they can trust. You trust people who put your needs ahead of their own. When you demonstrate your understanding, and help them to discover the best solution for them, people will trust you because they know you aren’t just looking out for number 1. Earning the trust of others is a huge part of selling yourself and implementing this success principle.

When people buy you they empower you. They empower you to help them. They empower you to reach out to other people like them. They empower you to grow and expand and achieve success. You have to earn empowerment from others, but the rewards are well worth the effort.

A participant in one of my recent seminars asked me, “Can I rearrange my client’s office during a sales presentation?”

The sales person had gone to an initial meeting where the chairs in the office were about eight feet from the customer’s desk. He wanted to know if it was OK to just pick up one of the chairs and move it next to the desk and start his presentation.

How would you have answered this question? Believe it or not, your answer could have huge implications on this meeting’s success.

USE INTUITION TO CREATE SALES-WINNING RELATIONSHIPS Everything in a customer’s office tells you a story about him or her—from the way the space is arranged to the items that have been collected and displayed.

Archeologists can dig up ancient cities and create a pretty accurate description of the inhabitants’ lifestyle just from the arrangement of the ruins and pottery fragments. As sales professionals we must do the same thing with the artifacts surrounding our customers, so we can communicate better and develop longer lasting relationships with them.

Here’s how you can promote a desirable impression and create sales-winning relationships by understanding space and the hidden message in things.

How to Promote a Desirable Impression by Understanding Space In 1966, when anthropologist Edward T. Hall described set measurable distances between people as they interact he defined four distances: • Intimate distance – 6” to 18”, for embracing, touching or whispering • Personal distance – 1.5 feet to 4 feet, for interactions among good friends • Social Distance – 5 feet to 12 feet, for interactions among acquaintances • Public Distance – more than 12 feet, for public speaking How does this relate to your sales process?

Think about one of your customers. Divide her office into concentric circles, starting from where she sits. The distance between the circles is about the width of her desk.

Anything close to the person—usually within arms reach—is the most important part of her office. This space generally contains her most precious, most valuable items. It is filled with clues that reveal to the trained sales professional a wealth of information about the customer and her needs and motivations.

As for the office the salesperson asked about rearranging, the chairs were set at the “social distance,” which the customer was communicating as appropriate for interactions among acquaintances (or in this case, sales people). For the sales person to pick up his chair and move into the next circle—personal distance—would have meant that he was declaring that the two of them were friends.

From the customer’s point of view this may or may not have been true. The customer could have reacted positively and allowed it. Or she could have reacted negatively and asked the sales person to leave. In any case, changing to another distance is likely to cause tension and would not promote a desirable impression.

A better strategy would be to ask permission to move the chair closer to the desk. Or, he could say that he had difficulty hearing the prospective customer clearly and then asked permission to move the chair.

How to Create Sales-Wining Relationships by Understanding the Hidden Message in "Things" Analyzing your clients or prospects’ rooms will tell you their motivations and behavioral styles. By paying close attention and analyzing the hidden message in things, you will know how to best serve your customer.

If his desk is meticulous, it indicates a high degree of close tolerance, sometimes called analytical. Or his desk could be very messy indicating an engaging personal or social trait, sometimes called influencing. These are all clues to guide you in making a presentation that will have the greatest appeal and impact on your customer.

The books on the bookcase will tell you what is currently or has been important to him.

Trophies, plaques and diplomas all tell you that he is motivated by recognition. While pictures of tropical isles indicate an idealistic approach to life and business. All of this information will guide you in presenting your case so the customer really “grasps” it.

Knowing how to analyze and use keys to the customer’s psyche is what separates the ordinary sales representatives from the sales professionals.

Here’s the point: By understanding sales psychology and enhancing your interpersonal skills you will make more sales. I guarantee it—and this is not just an idle claim. With more than 30 years of in-the-trenches sales experience and a Doctorate in Psychology, I’ve applied a wealth of knowledge, know how, and high impact techniques (like those described here) to help over 20,000 sales professionals improve their sales careers.

So, please take my advice. Take a moment to scope out your prospective customer’s office. It’s vital to developing longer lasting client relationships. The information about the person’s motivations and behavior is always available to you. Are you available to the information?

“The farmer, it appears, must not be approached too abruptly. If you are to get his money you must break the news to him gently. You should first talk about horses, soil, and market conditions. This conversation will show that you are interested in things close to him and likewise give you a chance to study his temperament and to learn his likes and dislikes, and discover his weaknesses.”

- Clarence Darrow in The American Mercury in 1925 writing about the topic of “Salesmanship” The concept of building rapport is not new. You can find book after book written from the 1920's onward that will teach you ‘techniques' for rapport building. For example, you might be told to look around the room and talk about what you see. “Ah, I see you have a big fish on your wall. Are you a fishing enthusiast? I go trout fishing all the time in Wyoming. Let's talk about trout.” Unfortunately, this is the type of contrived chit chat that many people today equate with the concept of rapport building.

Rapport building is not the planned buttering up of the buyer before the sales person moves in for the kill. The mindset behind this approach to rapport building is underhanded. I say very emphatically, “Don't do it.”

Yet the fundamental underlying need for a buyer to connect with a service provider— or even more to generally like him or her—exists and must be attended to. At least, it must if you want to generate new clients and retain your existing ones.

In our soon to be published research report How Clients Buy: The Benchmark Study of Purchasing Behavior for Professional Services, 26% of purchasers of professional services reported that they have, at one time or another, had no personal chemistry with their service provider. In and of itself this might not seem like a significant problem (although, who wants to feel they have cultivated no personal connection with 26 out of 100 potential clients).

More important, we also learned that 85% of these buyers would be either somewhat or much more likely to consider purchasing the services of the provider if some kind of personal chemistry was established. So clearly, we all would rather work with someone to whom we feel a personal connection.

Decisions, Decisions…

One company where I previously worked was going public. The process of selecting an accounting firm to help take us public included engaging discussions with all five of what were, at the time, the Big Five accounting firms. When we ultimately selected one of them, I asked our Chief Financial Officer—the primary decision maker—why we chose one firm over the others.

We proceeded to his office where he showed me the detailed grid of the decision criteria and why this firm met them the best. We talked about it for a few minutes and then he closed the door and said, “Do you want to hear the real reason I picked them?”

“Sure,” I said.

Then he told me, “I liked them better.”

He went on to tell me that three out of the five firms had the experience and capability to do a competent job of taking us public. He could argue, even, that one of the firms we did not select had a couple of advantages over the selected firm. Still, the advantages were not mission critical selection criteria, so they did not make it onto the decision criteria grid.

All things being equal, he picked the provider he liked the best, and he is not the only buyer who does this.

Building Real Rapport Many professional service providers are natural “people people” and connect with most everyone they meet. Many of us, however, feel uncomfortable making initial connections with potential clients, especially when we are meeting them for the first time.

When you look to build rapport—real rapport that helps you make a connection with your prospect or client—keep in mind the following advice: • Be genuine: Before the first day of school, first job, camp, and any family get together dad would always say, “Just be yourself and everything will be fine.” Same goes for generating rapport with clients and prospects. Do not try to be anything you are not; do not create a new persona; and do not adopt a sales-like tone. Just be yourself and relax. Good things will follow.

• Don't be in a rush…but don't dally: New would-be rainmakers are very sensitive to the time of a potential buyer. They often think, “I have one hour for this meeting and this is a CEO of a mid-sized company. I need to use the whole time to get my points across.”

If you jump right in with the “OK, let's get down to business” meeting kickoff before you give everyone a chance to take a breath and say hello, it often creates a tense atmosphere. You have to gauge when to start talking business at the right time. Start too early and a chilly abruptness fills the air. Take too much time chatting and the buyer wonders, “are we ever going to get going here?” Time the conversation right and you will be well on your way.

• Dress and act professionally: One would think that professional service providers do a good job dressing and acting professionally. Yet in How Clients Buy: The Benchmark Study of Purchasing Behavior for Professional Services just shy of 20% of purchasers of professional services reported that potential service providers, during the business development process, did not act professionally.

Do not disqualify yourself by using inappropriate language, wearing khakis when you are headed to a suit-and-tie company, or otherwise crossing the line of professionalism.

• Balance advocacy and inquiry: One of the best ways to establish a true connection with buyers is to balance asking questions (inquiry) with talking or giving advice (advocacy). Talk too much and the prospect will tune out. Ask too many questions and they will feel like they are in an interrogation room. The rapport building sweet spot is a balance between the two.

• Actively listen: The single most prevalent problem that buyers reported encountering with service providers is that service providers do not listen. If your prospects perceive you are not listening to them, building real rapport will be virtually impossible.

While the heading for this section is “actively listen” it could just as easily say, “Actually listen.” Many service providers are too caught up in what they are saying or too focused on what they are going to say next. As a result, they are not only not actively listening, they are not actually listening. Tune in to what your prospect is saying and tune out everything else, including your email, your pager, and your phone.

Willy Loman said in Death of a Salesman, “The man who makes an appearance in the business world, the man who creates a personal interest, is the man who gets ahead.

Be liked and you will never want." Sure, not everything worked out for Willy the way he

might have wanted, but he also needed a lot more than being well liked in order to succeed.

Many professional service providers, however, could use a page from Willy's book.

Being liked will not win you the clients on its own, but it sure does help.

Whenever and whatever you're pitching, dozens of factors will figure in the final decision of your prospects. All else being equal, you have the edge if you can establish a personal connection. Connect emotionally and intellectually, so they like and trust you more than your competitors. How can you get your prospects to like you? Try these tips.

• Focus and be sincere. If you appear nervous or unsure, you may seem devious or incompetent. If your sales presentation does not respond to their concerns and you just grind on with a prepared pitch, they will decide you don't care about them and their problems. Look people right in the eyes and convince them that you stand 100% behind the ideas, products, or services that you want to sell them. Pick up on their concerns, and address them.

• "Divide and conquer." If you're doing a sales presentation, shake hands with everyone as they enter the room. Connect with them so you see them as individuals, and you become more memorable to them too. (People are usually shyer of groups of strangers than in one-on-one contacts.)

• Use technology to enhance your sales presentation, not drown it. PowerPoint can keep you on track, but it can't establish trust.

• Keep it simple and memorable! When your prospects have a debriefing afterwards, you want them to remember what you said more than anything your competitors pitched to them. Break your talking points into snappy sound bites that are easy to write down and remember. Make them interesting and repeatable.

• Steer clear of technical language and jargon. Rehearse your presentation in advance with your spouse or an intelligent 12-year-old across the dinner table. If there's anything they don't understand, it's too complicated.

• Tell great stories. People are trained to resist a sales pitch, but no one can resist a good story. Let's say you're trying to get money to fund your software company. Tell a story about how the prospective investor's life will change when you bring the product to market: "Imagine that a year from now you'll come to work and use this software to do in 5 minutes what now takes you 45 minutes. I don't know what that would do to your life, but in all our test markets or pilot programs, people tell us..." Then add more stories.

Take a lesson from Hollywood. Give your stories interesting characters and dialogue, plus a dramatic lesson that your prospects can relate to. Don't say, "Certain companies have used our software." Don't even say, "IBM has used our software." Instead, say, "Joe Smith at IBM said to me, 'If we don't increase sales turnover by 20%, we want make our projections'. We guaranteed them they could if they used our software. Six months later, Joe called and said, 'You guys saved us.'"

If you are pitching a product that hasn't been built yet, build a story about what it will be like for someone using it.

Everything else being equal, you're way ahead of any and all your competition when your prospects relate to you, like you, and trust you.

Years ago, George Carlin listed seven words you can’t say on television. Then HBO came along, said all the words, and the world of television changed forever. Now, I know that even before you read the seven no-no phrases in sales, you might be tempted to think, oh, whatever these are they will eventually become acceptable, too.

There are two big problems with this reasoning.

1. Television has been around for about sixty years so it is still a youngster experiencing growing pains; sales started way back when the inventor of the wheel made a few extras to sell to friends.

2. The seven sales phrases are already being said by salespeople and they are delivering decidedly mediocre results. They live on because veteran salespeople say them and novice salespeople ape them. The cycle continues.

The big challenge with these words is that they undermine the credibility of salespeople and they encourage defensive barriers to spring up in the minds of the prospective buyers. Talk about salespeople shooting themselves in the foot! These phrases either degrade what could be a great sale down to a pedestrian transaction or they scare off buyers. And worse, less experienced salespeople think they are supposed to say these phrases in order to entice buyers. Here is a word to my sales colleagues: No matter whether you are selling products, services, and/or ideas, avoid using these phrases!

They will make buyers distrust you.

As you hear these seven, think of yourself as a buyer not a salesperson. (Did you ever stop to consider that over the course of your life you will most likely buy more products and services than you will sell?) As a buyer, imagine you are in situation in which a salesperson has recently made your acquaintance.

Test your gut reaction. Do any of these seven make you want to buy – or do they make you want to run?

Here are the seven deadly phrases in sales. Actually, one of these is a pair of words, not a phrase. But all of these leave the same unpleasant after-taste as one bad word.

Trust me. Instructing people to trust a salesperson is pretty much like setting up a toofamiliar joke whose punch line is going to be “you are an idiot so just give me lots of your money now.” The pairing of trust and me signals buyers to put up their defense shields and turn on their BS filters (for Better Sense, of course). Trust is one of the two concepts that the more somebody asks for it, the more elusive it becomes. Trust – like love – cannot be requested effectively. Although it is plentiful, it has to be earned to be genuine. And besides, it is the buyer’s prerogative to decide whom to trust, when, and how much. Asking for trust will actually hinder the salesperson from getting it. (P.S. “Believe me when I say…” is in the same league.)

I’m your friend. It is tempting for a salesperson to think a buyer is a new friend after the two share fifteen minutes excitedly discussing a mutual experience or passion. This happens, for example, when both share an obsession for golf and both once played the course at Pebble Beach in their youth. However, too many salespeople mistake rapport for friendship. The two are not the same. Friendship requires an emotional investment and real commitment. Friendship takes time, energy, and some sacrifice.

Friendliness is a great way to ease any tensions in the sales process but over-friendliness can raise resentment in buyers’ minds.

Nobody can sell this cheaper than me. Nobody? First off, the world is a big place with a lot of others selling things a lot like what other salespeople have. If the salesperson really has the world’s lowest price on something and can do business both legally and profitably, instead of wasting time one-on-one with prospects, he or she should put up a website and rake in the dough. And second, the problem with bragging about being cheapest (besides triggering buyers’ skepticism) is that it is a lousy way to make a profit.

A more satisfactory approach is to show the value of the product, service, or idea.

Value takes into account integrity, experience, service, reliability, trustworthiness, uniqueness, desirability, return, and how the buyer will be better for buying. Promoting value ahead of price is a rock-solid strategy for long-term success.

We are the best! Okay, maybe there are a few situations in which this is credible. And I am not opposed to the power of positive thinking as a confidence builder. But the truth is buyers have learned that ninety-nine percent of the salespeople who say it are lying.

A phrase like this turns on their BS filter. Best, like beauty, is in the eye of the buyer – not the salesperson.

Always and never. This pair stands on the same quicksand as “We are the best.” They sound like exaggerations and are frequently perceived as stretching the truth. For example, how truthful do these two statements sound? “We always provide quality service.” “Our delivery drivers are never late.” Many people simply don’t take always and never at face value. A few years ago I did a series of training programs for engineers from several Miller Brewing locations. I asked each to write the words always and never. Then I asked each to express as a percentage what the words meant. As you would expect, some saw always as a one hundred percent occurrence and never as zero percent. But the unforgettable thing was that twenty-five percent saw them as somewhere in between. Too many, always and never were so abused they became synonymous with frequently and occasionally. For example, “I never lie” was readily perceived as a lie and was reinterpreted to mean “I occasionally lie.”

What you need is... This is actually a great phrase after high levels of rapport and trust have been developed. But even then this is pretty presumptuous on the part of the salesperson because he is not the one who has to live with the purchase. Just a few days ago a salesperson, with whom there was not much rapport or trust, told me “What you need is this computer.” That may have been so, but the salesperson did not ask questions -- so he knew little about me, my situation, or what I wanted to accomplish. I didn’t care what he thought I needed. I listened, learned a few things, walked out the store, and bought one elsewhere. (See number one.)

This is perfect for everyone. This is another statement that is hard to accept as true (Is H&R Block perfect for everyone?). Before adding this one to the list I tried hard to think of one commercial product or service that really is perfect for everyone. The closest I could get was bottled water. But then I thought, “If the brand of bottled water you sell is indeed perfect for everyone, why do you have competition? Doesn’t the mere existence of stiff competition indicate that for some buyers other brands are more

perfect for them?” Okay, you don’t sell bottled water. But re-read the above substituting your stuff for bottled water.

Some other phrases, such as “The check is in the mail,” undermine rather than build. No matter how well intentioned, when salespeople use these seven phrases, and related phrases, buyers hear something that is questionable. This can cause buyers to react protectively and be selective about what they choose to believe. That results in fewer closed sales. A smart strategy for salespeople is to steer clear of these seven toxic phrases.

Are you as intelligent as you want to be? Has anyone ever told you that you’re bright or smart? If you answered yes to these questions, you’re likely thinking of traditional intelligence. However, what about your “emotional” intelligence?

Several years ago actors Dustin Hoffman and Tom Cruise made a movie called Rainman. In it Raymond, (Rain Man) the title character was Autistic Savant. He was literally a genius and an idiot at the same time. Raymond's greatest intellect was Mathematical. He could count and calculate as fast as a computer. But at the same time he was dysfunctional interpersonally. He couldn't even carry on a normal conversation. The movie was based on truth.

If we were to pose the most common question regarding intellect to Raymond, what answer would we get? Here is the question; how smart is he? You'd get contradictory answers wouldn't you?

What does it mean to be smart? It used to mean you could ace an IQ test or score well on the S.A.T. (Scholastic Aptitude Test). Smart people were the ones who were good at math and spelling and had huge memories. In many schools kids were separated by their scores. The smart kids got more attention and more privileges that the "slower" ones.

In business we have traditionally defined smart as the ability to solve problems and understand things quickly. In fact quickness has been widely accepted as a trait of intellect.

Yet many of the world's great discoveries came not through quickness but through sustained laborious thinking and creativity. Thomas Edison is said to have been "a drudge" before his invention of the light bulb. He reportedly tried thousands of times to create it with no success.

Many of our concepts on intelligence have been shaken up recently. Fore most among the tree shakers has been Dr. Howard Gardner whose book Frames of Mind cites seven types of intelligence. He says we've been measuring smarts too narrowly. Thomas Armstrong Ph.D. extends this concept in his book Seven Kinds of Smart.

These great thinkers have proposed a much healthier question regarding intellect, not how smart are you but how are you smart? If we asked that question of Raymond, the answer would be immediate, He is smart mathematically. That answer would give us a sense of what he would do well, what he would probably enjoy and where his greatest

contributions would come from. Gardner and Armstrong have provided us with some valuable new insight.

The basis of their conclusions is this: There are at least seven multiple intelligences, all of which are possessed by everyone, except in different proportions. Your main smarts may be my lesser ones and vice versa.

Here are the Seven Multiple Intelligences • Verbal -the ability to use words • Visual -the ability to see things in your mind • Physical -the ability to use your body well • Musical -the ability to understand and use music • Mathematical & logical -the ability to apply logic to systems and numbers • Introspective -the ability to understand thoughts and feelings in yourself • Interpersonal -the ability to relate well to others, people smarts.

Let's explore each one briefly. As we do, think about which are your strongest kinds of intellect.

Verbal: good at explaining things, likes writing and reading, places more importance on things which are written or verbalized, likes word pictures, puns, creative phrasing, new words, enjoys expanding vocabulary.

Visual: Uses charts & symbols to get a point across, sees things clearly in the mind, can sense what something will look like, likes pictures and demonstrations to help understand things.

Physical: learns best by doing, wants to get hands on contact with the subject, feels a need to move while learning, and pastimes involve activity or handiwork.

Musical: Remembers tunes and lyrics easily, uses music as a frame of reference, has a natural sense of timing or rhythm, enjoys sounds of all types, is easily distracted by sounds, notices the cadence of things.

Mathematical & Logical: Likes to put things in order, arranges things logically, looks for patterns and relationships between things, good at analysis, calculation, planning.

Needs for things to make sense. Speaks in sequences; first ..., second..., then third.

Introspective: enjoys quiet time to be alone in thought, understands his own motives and reasons for doing things, likes to daydream about new ideas and explore his own feelings and thoughts. Reflective, thoughtful.

Interpersonal: People smart, good with others, can mediate arguments, knows what to do to connect with someone else, sensitive to others, likes contact with people, teams, committees, social events.

Which of those best describes you? You have all seven intelligences. But only a few of them are really strong in you. Which ones?

Once you know your smarts, or another person's, then you know how to reach them most quickly and what will be easiest for them to comprehend. You also will know how they prefer to go about learning things.

If you encounter a person with Interpersonal smarts, they will learn best with people.

They'll enjoy group activities and team learning. One who has mathematical smarts will learn quicker if things are outlined and displayed in a systematic format. Verbal smarts work best when things are explained in words or written down. Teach a physically smart

person by getting them involved in the learning. Give them something to do to practice the skill. One with visual smarts will want to sketch out the idea or see it displayed visually.

Musically smart people will grasp an idea better if it is poetically presented or put to music. For example: ABCDEFG... And the introspectively smart person will use reflection as part of the learning process. They will want time to quietly think about it.

Two things we need to know about all people we deal with are: How do they process information and how do they relate to people? Their multiple intelligences have implications in both areas but especially in how they process information.

So how do you aid your own learning now that you have a sense of how you are smart?

Well here are some ways suggested by Thomas Armstrong author of Seven Kinds of Smart and by Brian Tracy and Colin Rose, authors of Accelerated Learning Techniques.

Verbal: Put things in your own words. Write it down Visual: Draw a mind map of the ideas. Create a sketch or schematic. See it unfold in your mind as if it were a movie.

Physical: Use flash cards to arrange and shuffle the ideas. Act out what you've learned.

Mime the activity or information. Musical: Compose a jingle or rhyme to describe it.

Listen to music you like as you learn it. Mathematical: Outline the ideas.

Devise a formula to explain it, i.e.: Awareness times Behavior equals Mastery.

Introspective: Think about what it means to you. Reflect on your past experiences to find validation of what you are learning or how you can use it. Interpersonal: Discuss the subject. Teach it to someone else. Turn it into a team activity, each one teach one.

Is this starting to fall into place for you? The ways in which you are smart are a part of the seed within you and hold the key to your further growth. So start now to notice more about your smarts and explore your natural intelligence.

There are a lot of smart people in the world. They are inventing things, running successful companies, building skyscrapers and advancing technologies. At the same time, do these smart people know what they feel and what to do with that?

In The Nicomachean Ethics, Aristotle said that anyone can become angry - that is easy.

But to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the right purpose, and in the right way - this is not easy.

Perhaps you’ve heard of EQ, or Emotional Intelligence. Much has been written about it.

In a nutshell, EQ is the capacity to know what we are feeling, and to then make the most appropriate choices in the presence of those feelings.

We’ve all been in situations where we were flooded with emotion and then said the wrong thing, made some unproductive choices or were downright destructive. Why did that happen? Why we were emotionally hijacked?

In the function of the human brain, a “fight or flight” response mechanism is the root of our reactions. Since many people don’t have a vocabulary for what they feel when they feel it, instead of intellectually interpreting what is happening, they go into react

mode. If, however, they had a greater EQ, they would have the capacity to make choices that are more appropriate in a given circumstance.

This has significant implications in the business world and in relationships in general. With higher EQ, we tend to have meetings that are more productive, better functioning teams, higher motivation, and retention of key employees. It’s when we are bogged down in feelings that we waste time complaining, resisting and undermining our best objectives. It’s also a time when conflict increases and good employees quit.

The starting point is awareness and developing a “feelings” vocabulary. Most of our emotions fit within seven feeling categories. These include pain, shame, fear, loneliness, anger, guilt and joy. With these, do an experiment this week. See if you can raise your own awareness of what you are feeling, when you are feeling it. Use the list of seven feelings as a guide. Let me know how it goes!

When we think about what we know about selling from the past, for some of us the image of the stereotype pushy salesperson comes to mind. The first thought many of us have is someone is trying to get me to buy something.

None of us likes the experience of "being sold." We become distrustful and will quickly say, "I'm not interested." Do you have to be like all those images we have of pushy salespeople? No. We all have different selling styles.

Have you ever watched individuals speak and you found yourself listening to every word they said? You didn't know the individuals, but there was something about them that drew you to them. It happened because they were being genuine and real. They were being themselves.

RELATIONSHIPS Relationships is a beautiful meditation designed to honor partnerships & relationships.

Working around issues of respect, space, flexibility and commitment. This meditation is perfect for those needing to feel nurtured, respected and heard. Excellent to use where there are feelings of insecurity, lack of confidence, possessiveness, jealousy, lack of creativity, feeling unloved and rejected. Difficulties with sexuality, giving and receiving.

Stamina, libido and general vitality low. Physical problems with the reproductive system, PMS and menopause, prostate disease, sexuality, lower back pain, kidneys and bladder.

NINE TIPS TO BECOMING AUTHENTIC Being successful in sales doesn't come from being slick or pushy, or copying someone else's selling style. That never works because people can sense you're not yourself. The key is to understand who you are and be yourself.

Sales success begins with being who you are. It's really is as simple as that.

The prospect will come to you because they're attracted to your authenticity. When you're being real, your honesty and trust shines through, and people are drawn to you.

Let's start to define what selling really is. Once you begin to uncover your own authentic selling style, you'll start closing more business faster and with ease. Here are 9 ways to get you started: • Selling is no longer being the slick, aggressive, and pushy salesperson.

• Selling is being more interested in the prospect than in what you have to say.

• Selling is creating a trusting and honest relationship with the prospect.

• Selling is being a keen listener and listening for what's most important to the prospect.

• Selling is thinking of ways of helping the prospect.

• Selling is going the extra mile and doing the unexpected for the prospect.

• Selling is showing you genuinely want to help them get to where they want to go.

• Selling is making yourself easily accessible to your clients either by phone or email.

• Selling is being yourself. Remember, you are unique and special so let that shine through!

Armed with these essential communication skills, you'll be able to keep your network alive and growing. The best communicators know how to: 1. Smile 2. Look the person in the eye 3. Listen 4. Remember names 5. Be aware of body language 6. Be respectful of other people's boundaries 7. Look for common interests 8. Give genuine compliments 1. Smile.

A smile is the first step in building rapport. Remember to smile when you enter a room, a business meeting, and even when you answer the phone. I give people mirrors with the phrase printed on the case, "Can your smile be heard?" I tell them to put the mirror on their desk when they are talking on the phone in order to see their expression. And, yes, a smile can be heard. Remember also, when you're talking with someone face to face, they become the mirror that reflects your expression. Your expression is the most important thing you wear. Smiling can raise your spirits and can even affect the way you sound. A smile can also disarm another. Use this powerful communication tool to your advantage.

2. Look the person in the eye.

Making good eye contact shows respect and interest. Have you ever been speaking with a person who was looking over your shoulder instead of at you? Did you feel like, "he doesn't think I'm important," or, "he's not even listening to me?"

Once at a trade show, I was talking to a man who spent the whole five minutes of a conversation that he had initiated looking everywhere except at me. In fact, at one point, he saw someone he obviously wanted to speak with and in mid-sentence; he turned around and began speaking with the other person as if I had evaporated into thin air.

Eye contact is one of the strongest communication skills we can develop. It's been said, and I believe it's true, "the eyes are the windows of the soul."

3. Listen with care.

One of the greatest compliments you can give another is to let him or her know you are listening to everything that is said. Find the hidden word in LISTEN using all the letters. The word is SILENT. That is what our internal voice must be to get the full impact of what others are saying. Remember that when you are networking with a new contact, it is like reading the paper. Let the person tell you the story so you can discover the "news you can use." More people have literally talked themselves out of a job or a sale by talking instead of sitting back and actively listening. It takes real concentration to listen.

4. Remember names.

Dale Carnegie, author of How to Win Friends and Influence People says, "...a person's name is the sweetest and most important sound in any language..."

It pays to remember names. Here are three ways to sharpen your name memory skills.

1. Form an impression of the person's appearance and embed it into your mind. Note height, stature, color of hair and eyes, facial expression, and any distinguishing physical features. Do not concentrate so much on dress, or even hairstyle. These may be different the next time you meet.

2. Repeat the person's name after you meet and several times during the conversation.

When you repeat their name two things happen-they are flattered and the name goes into your memory bank.

3. Make up a visual story about the person's name. Associate the person's name with something that will remind you of it. Use your imagination; build a mind picture; put the person into your visual story. The sillier the story, the easier it will be to remember. Here is an example of how to remember my name with a visual story.

My name is Andrea Nierenberg. Picture me in the Antarctic, dressed in white fur, clinging to the bow of a sinking ship, the "Andrea Doria" (Andrea) which is "near an iceberg" (Nier-en-berg). There you have a picture of me and my name, Andrea Nierenberg. Remember, the sillier the visual story, the easier it is to remember.

5. Be aware of your body language.

"What you do speaks so loudly that I cannot hear what you say." - Ralph Waldo Emerson.

You can say a lot without ever opening your mouth. Research tells us perceptions are formed in three ways: Verbal makes up 7 percent, Non-verbal 38 percent, and Visual is 55 percent of our perception of others. Notice that body language makes up the biggest percentage. Make sure your body language communicates what you truly want to say.

B-Breathe deeply and consistently. This steadies your nerves and gives you a pleasant facial expression that says, "I'm glad to be speaking with you."

O-Overtures can speak volumes. Nod to show encouragement and to show you are listening. Keep an open posture to show you are receptive.

D-Demeanor is the part of your personality demonstrated by body language. A blank stare, crossed arms, nervous gestures, all convey the opposite of what you want to communicate.

Y-"You" meaning the other person should be your main focus. Observe patterns of others and find a way to match styles to ease the interaction. For example, if you are sitting across the table from a person who is leaning in to create a closer connection, follow suit. Do not lean back; this says, "I'm not interested."

6. Be respectful of other people's boundaries.

The invisible boundaries around us define our personal space. It varies from culture to culture. Most Americans become uncomfortable if someone is closer than 18 inches. In some countries, standing as close as we do in the United States is considered too far apart. In other places, it is too close. People's boundaries are not only an issue for travelers. America is a melting pot so you need to be aware of the diversity within our own country.

7. Look for common interests.

Ask open-ended questions and then listen to what others have to say. Develop your list of "get to know you questions" so that they are easy and automatic. Make sure they are phrased so they that cannot be answered with just one word. Or, at least have a follow up question ready. Some people you meet-you probably know the type-will take your questions quite literally. "Did you enjoy the speaker?" you ask, hoping to start a conversation. "Yes" is the answer you get, followed by silence. So, change your question to, "How did you find the speaker's presentation?" You may still get, "Fine." But then you can follow up with, "What did you particularly like about it?"

Once you establish your common interests, the conversation will flow, and you will easily find reasons to follow up and keep in touch.

8. Give genuine compliments.

When you listen to someone carefully, often they will mention something which they are proud of. Think for a moment and find a way to acknowledge the person's achievement. Make a goal of finding at least one positive trait or characteristic in each person you meet that you can compliment. It may seem awkward at first, but soon it will become second nature.

As a general rule, most of us do not give out compliments as often as they might be deserved. We worry that we will come across as phony, or as if we are doing it because we want something. This is why it is so critical to be sincere and to give a compliment only when you mean it.

Building trust between you and your potential client is a very important step that needs to occur first or else they won't buy from you. In fact, building trust is a prerequisite to selling. So how do you go about building this trust? Following are 7 tips.

Tip #1 When having a sales conversation, explore whether you can help the person get what they want. Forget about selling because as soon as someone feels you're trying to sell something, they'll instinctively not trust you. That's just human nature. If, however, someone feels you are genuinely trying to help them, then they'll be more likely to trust you and buy from you.

Tip #2 Ask questions - be sincere. When you sincerely ask a potential client questions and you come from the perspective that you want to understand if you can help them, the more likely they are to trust you. Please note that I use the word "sincerely." People will know if you're just asking questions because you think you ought to.

Tip #3 Listen to people - be sincere. When you ask someone questions, actively and sincerely (there's that word again) listen to their answers. Put yourself in their shoes and listen from their perspective. Be fully present and release all judgment. The more you sincerely listen to someone the more they will trust you.

Tip #4 Watch what you're thinking. You may not realize it, but when you're talking to a potential client, they will pick up on what you're thinking and feeling. There is no hiding this! Therefore, before you have a sales conversation get in the appropriate thinking mode so you're feeling and thinking thoughts that will result in the person trusting you.

Tip #5 Do what it takes to build up your confidence. If you don't feel confident about having a sales conversation, people will sense it. If you're not confident, chances are the person you're talking to will not feel confident about you. This will impact the level of trust. Identify ways you can increase your confidence in having a sales conversation.

What courses can you take what books can you read and so on?

Tip #6 'Be' Your Word. In your conversations with people, ensure that what you say you will do and what you do are in 100% alignment. If you're not in alignment you won't go far. 'Be' your word and people (including yourself) will trust you. There is one simple thing that can lose potential clients fast. Once you have lost them due to this one thing, it is virtually impossible to ever get them back.

You can also lose your current clients with this one simple thing. Not only will it cause your clients to stop using your services but they will definitely not refer anyone to you.

That is the power of this one simple thing.

This one simple thing is not keeping your word. It's saying you'll do something and then not doing it. Just suppose you say to a potential client, "I will send you that additional information tomorrow." Then tomorrow comes and goes and you get really busy and you don't send it until the day after. No big deal, you think to yourself as it's only one day late and it's not going to make a big difference. Yes, it probably does not make a difference to the potential client whether they get it tomorrow or the day after.

However, if you don't do it when you said you would do it, it will make a HUGE difference to what the client thinks of you.

What do you think a potential client would think of you if you said you would do something, no matter how minor, and you did not do it? They could possibly think: * This person is unreliable. I can't trust them. * This person lacks integrity: their word is not their word. * I can't trust this person to do what they say they will do. * If they are not keeping their word on these simple things, can I trust what they are saying about their service? * If this is how they treat me before I become a client, then how will they treat me if I become a client? * I am obviously not that important to them.

Just suppose a current client calls you with a problem and you promise to call them back with a solution later that day. You get busy on another project and forget to call them. What do you think they might say to themselves about you? They could possibly say: * This person is unreliable and lacks integrity. * Now that I am a client, they obviously care less about me. * I am not going to buy any more services if this is how I'll be treated. * Is there someone else I can find to do this for me who is reliable? * I am definitely not going to refer anyone to them and risk my reputation.

So keeping your word is important not only for gaining new clients but also in keeping your current clients and gaining referrals.

Keeping your word is also important for how you think about you. If you don't keep your word, you take a hit on your own confidence and self-esteem. You start to lose trust in yourself. This impacts all areas of your business and personal life.

When you have said you will do something by a certain date and something comes up preventing you from doing it, simply communicate and renegotiate as soon as possible.

Communicate with the client, apologize, and get their confirmation that it is okay if you now complete it by date "x" instead.

Starting today, I urge you to honor your word with everyone no matter how small or apparently insignificant what you have committed to appears to be. Then start to observe how clients react and how you feel. Client attraction will be just one of the rewards. Let me know how you go Tips #1 through #6 are essential but if you really want to accelerate the process of building trust read Tip #7 Tip #7 Get yourself known as the expert in your niche/target market. People trust experts. People believe (rightly or wrongly) that you wouldn't have reached "expert"

status unless you know what you're doing. If you're serious about building your business and building trust, get yourself known.

Implement these 7 simple tips and you'll be amazed at the increase in trust you'll generate. I assure you this will result in more business for you.

Being The Best In Every Area What is character? Your character is the degree to which you live your life consistent with high, life-enhancing values. A person who lacks character is one who compromises on higher order values in favor of lower order expedience, or who has no values at all.

Your adherence to what you believe to be right and true is the real measure of the person you have become to this moment.

Define What "Excellence" Means to You

Let us say that one of your values is "excellence." Your definition of excellence could be, "Excellence means that I set the highest standards for myself in everything I do. I do my very best in every situation and under all circumstances. I constantly strive to be better in my work, and as a person in my relationships. I recognize that excellence is a life long journey and I work every day to become better and better in everything I do."

Organize Your Actions With a definition like this, you have a clear organizing principle for your actions. You have set a standard by which you can evaluate your behavior. You have created a framework within which you can make decisions. You have a measuring rod against which you can compare yourself in everything you do. You can continually grade your activities in terms of "more" or "less." You have a clear target to aim at and organize your work around.

Decide What You Want For Your Family It's the same with each of your other values. If your value is your family, you could define this as, "The needs of my family take precedence over all other concerns. Whenever I have to choose between the happiness, health and well being of a member of my family, and any other interest, my family will always come first."

Keep Focused From that moment onward, it becomes easier for you to choose. Your family comes first.

Until you have fully satisfied the needs of your family, no other time requirement will side track you into a lower value activity.

A vice-principal at a high school in my neighborhood floored me the other day when she told me that a surprisingly high percentage of kids in the gifted program are 'cutters'. She explained they self-mutilate partly in response to the extremely high expectations that people have of them because they have the 'gifted' label.

You see, while they may be gifted in one area, it's unlikely they're gifted in all areas, so they don't feel like they truly deserve the gifted label. And in the areas where they truly are gifted, it just feels natural -- like it's nothing special -- and so they feel like a fake.

An imposter.

That sounded hauntingly familiar to what I see and hear so often in the Developing Strategic Intuition & Creativity workshop. No matter how brilliant the participants are (and believe me, we have exceptional, successful people in the workshop), many of them seem to be the last people to see and acknowledge their own strengths.

Just like the kids in the gifted program, it almost always comes down to one of two possible reasons: • They're so good at what they do that it comes effortlessly to them, and that makes it hard for them to see there's anything special about it. • They know they're really good at something, but whatever it is, it isn't the job title on their business card, (which tends to be broader than their specific area of expertise), and so on some level -- they feel like a fake.

It turns out there really is such a thing as the Imposter Syndrome. According to Dr. Valerie Young (www.impostersyndrome.com ) it's when you feel like you're not really as bright as everyone else thinks you are.

And guess what?

Cindy Stone, psychotherapist/coach, author of The Incidental Guru (www.incidentalguru.com) and also, incidentally, a member of the Bull Pen, told me that it's especially common in people who she calls 'extremely bright, high-achieving, broadband thinkers'.

Are you with me so far? Good, because here's where it gets personal.

The more I researched the Imposter Syndrome, the more I understood the transformation that I had personally gone through when I created the Developing Strategic Intuition & Creativity program.

You see, it wasn't until I had to develop my own Strategic Intuition & Creativity (except I didn't call it that back then), that I realized the usual elevator speeches and infomercials simply weren't working for me. All that sales & marketing bunk felt superficial and fake.

I had to look elsewhere and I had to dig deeper. And so, working from my own skill as a copywriter and my interest in human behavior, I created a series of exercises and approaches that helped me strip away the veneer to get absolutely clear about who I am, what I do, and the true value I give my clients. It was the clarity I needed before I could get the business I wanted.

Those exercises evolved into what the Essential Message program is today. And it really is powerful stuff -- as much for the personal transformation that participants go through as for the business results they achieve.

I finally understand why I am so driven to do the work I do. And I finally understand why people get so much out of it.

If you're undercutting your own Essential Message, maybe you have something in common with those gifted kids too?

Shape Your Own Character The wonderful thing about values clarification is that it enables you to take charge of developing and shaping your own character. When your values and goals, your inner life and your outer life, are in complete alignment, you feel terrific about yourself. You enjoy high self-esteem. Your self-confidence soars.

When you achieve complete congruence between your values and your goals, like a hand in a glove, you feel strong, happy, healthy and fully integrated as a person. You develop a kind of courage that makes you completely unafraid to make decisions and take action. Your whole life improves when you begin living your life by the values that you most admire.

Action Exercises Here are two things you can do to put this ideas into action immediately.

1. First, create a clear, written description of your values and what they mean to you. From that point on, resolve to live consistent with your own definition.

2. Second, discipline yourself to live in complete alignment with the values, virtues and qualities that are most important to you. This is the key to character.

How Intuition Works - Understanding it's Language Intuition sends us messages in different forms all the time, everyday. Sometimes intuition can be that gut feeling that I just mentioned - when you know something - but just don't have anything to substantiate what you know.

For example: last week I was driving on the highway - I had at least another hour to go before I got close to my destination. A limousine went speeding by me - and for a moment I thought about tagging along behind him - but something just didn't sit right. I chose not to speed with him and stayed where I was.

About a half-hour later I saw the same limousine pulled over along the side of the road getting a speeding ticket and thought - that could have been me - good thing I stayed where I was. Here's another example; several years ago I was in Seattle - a city I'm somewhat familiar with but not completely knowledgeable of all the streets. I recall driving along near Pike Street Market - trying to figure out how to get back on to highway 5 and head north. Finally I figured out how to get back on the highway - and decided to speed up a little - but the car in front of me was going rather slow so I thought about passing it - but again something didn't sit right-so I just stayed behind him. A minute later another car zipped past us both - it was not more than 20-feet ahead of us going through a green light when another car smashed into it - the other car was going through a red light. We had to stay and talk to the police - but again my instincts saved me - that could have been me in the accident had I chose to pass the car a minute earlier - but I trusted my gut and stayed put.

I remember when I was in an investigative Programmer in New York and I was interviewing the Chief of Detectives for the New York City Police Department. It was his last day on the job before starting a new life as a public citizen now that he was retiring.

He had spent 25 years on the job and let me tell you - he'd seen just about everything. I asked him: "How can an average citizen, walking down Broadway just after sunset, protect himself or herself from a mugger? No everybody carries mace or has selfdefense training? What can Miss. Or Mr. Average do to protect themselves?" I'll never forget his response. This elderly man, with his receding gray hair, leaned forward and said: "Karim, at some point, just before something bad is going to happen to you - those little hairs on the back of your neck stand up. They're telling you not to cross the street, not to go further, to stop in your track and turn around - go in a direction where help can be found. If the average person paid attention to that - paid attention to those little hairs standing up on the back of their necks - they'd live a long time." Those little hairs stand up because your intuition is trying to tell you not to do something or warn you of imminent danger so - you then have to take the necessary steps to get out of the situation as quickly as possible. Quite simply - intuition can save your life if you just listen to it.

Fellow readers - I can't tell you how many times my intuition has saved me. There are probably numerous other times that my intuition has saved me and I'm not even aware of those instances. These are situations when I followed my instincts but don't know what

the outcome would have been had I not followed them. Sometimes we won't know what would have happened if we didn't follow our instincts.

Intuition comes in many forms - like I said at the beginning - think of intuition as a partner trying to help you and guide you along the way - so that no harm comes to you.

Sometimes this partner will speak with a feeling, sometimes it will speak with words through another person, sometimes it will give you signals, and sometimes it will simply try to stop you from doing something that isn't good for you. We have to understand how it is speaking to us and when it is speaking to us. Let's go over some of the examples I just mentioned.

I've gone over how intuition speaks with feeling. Sometimes it's a gut feeling - an overwhelming feeling that you should do something, avoid something or follow up on something. Sometimes intuition will speak with words through someone else. For example: you may be thinking about buying a new home but you're not sure what area. The first person you speak to mentions a particular area, the next person you speak to mentions the same area and then a third person mentions the same area then you're looking in the paper and you see an article praising the area that you're friends were telling you about. In this case your intuition is likely trying to get you to consider that certain area - and perhaps it's time to take a look.

Sometimes intuition will try to give you signals - the article in the newspaper in the above example is a signal. Seeing things that correspond with what you are trying to find an answer to is a signal. Sometimes intuition will try to stop you from taking a certain course of action. You may want to buy a home in a certain area - but everything you find is not up to your standard or way out of your price range. Here you may be getting a signal to look in another area, be patient until you find the right place, or think about other options. You may be trying to get a certain job at a certain place - but there are no openings and nothing is coming up. Intuition may be telling you to look for other options and not pursue the job you are so set on.

In all cases - the message isn't always as clear as we would like it to be. The way intuition speaks to us isn't always easy to understand. But if you keep testing it and keep searching the answer will become clear. The feeling will be overwhelming. The signals will be repeated and clear. The messages from other people will be repeated over and over again. Then the message becomes clear. Sometimes you may not understand the message until years later. But it will all make sense at some point - and that point is when the time is right.

The common element in all of the situations that I just mentioned is that in every case there was a question involved. If you want to find an answer to something and you will always get a response. You just have to understand the message. The first time you get the response - you may not understand it and it may not be clear. If you're not sure don't do anything - wait until you get another message and see if it's along the same lines as the original message. The key is not to be fooled by your mind. Your mind is not your intuition - so don't think that when you ask for something you'll get an immediate answer from your mind - that's not an answer. That's just your mind playing tricks with you.

So how can we get our intuition to help us and how can we better understand the answer?

If you want to get guidance from your intuition first decide what it is you want - then ask for an answer. For example: you want to buy a new home - say I want to buy a new home and I want to know what area I should buy in. What area should I buy my home in? Where should I buy my new home? Keep repeating the question. Then tell yourself that you have the answer - say I know where to buy my new home. Then let go. Don't expect an answer immediately. If you get one in your mind - it's not the answer - it's just your mind and ego playing tricks with you. Let go. Forget about it. The next step is often the most difficult - trust that the answer will come at the right time. As human beings we like to take control of things - we like to know what is going to happen and we want to make things happen. But sometimes you can't - sometimes you just have to be patient and wait for the answer - trusting that it will come at exactly the right time. When it does come - you'll know and you'll follow through. You can do the above exercise for anything you want or for any answer you are seeking. In time you will get the answer but it will be at the right time - and not on your time.

Another thing that you can do to develop your intuition is to meditate and stay positive.

By meditating you calm your mind and by staying positive you become more positive and understand that you will get the answer.

Developing Strategic Intuition & Creativity will teach you how to develop your intuition, it will teach you how to better understand the messages your intuition is sending you; Developing Strategic Intuition & Creativity will teach you how to meditate so you get answers and how to stay positive so the answers come naturally and easily.

AUTHENTIC POWER - A powerful meditation created to resonate, strengthen and realign the solar plexus energy center. The music and sounds are specially designed to create balance and re-energize mind, body and spirit. This meditation is all about power and self worth. This is the center where we develop and perceive our emotions. If you struggle with the “need to please�, the need to be liked and the need to rescue and fix others then this meditation is for you. If you have difficulty with authority, feelings of guilt, anger and rage, feeling powerless or all powerful, difficulty with reaching your potential?

Finally - I said that in some cases we don't know the outcome had we not followed our intuition. This is very important because once you learn how to trust your intuition you won't need the reassurance of know what would have happened had you not followed your intuition. We can't always know everything and at some point we have to trust and let go - once you learn to do that everything will flow to you naturally and easily.

Developing Strategic Intuition & Creativity teaches you how to achieve your goals by developing the power of your mind and subconscious mind. Creating Power will teach you how to develop your intuition so you always get the guidance you are seeking.

The creative arts are further along at developing intuitive talent than academia and the worlds of science and technology. Intuition is at the core of the creative arts, but it is equally central to any creative endeavor. In the creative arts, intuition is often holds center stage. There are disciplined approaches to developing and extending it.

Method Acting is one example.

Intuitive abilities we’re unable to attribute to subconsciously stored memories and experiences or to the conscious brain’s analytic processes make sense in another context: The body is connected by sensory perception to a field of energy that enfolds the information we attribute to intuition.

To help us understand this concept consider an established scientific fact in the area of quantum physics that could not be explained by classical physics in the early 20th century: We know there is virtually instantaneous communication of information in the subatomic world between particles separated by vast regions of space and these particles act is if they have knowledge of events before they happen. This "nonlocal communication" seemingly exists outside the confines of space and time as we currently understand them.

How do we recognize and develop intuitive talent? When I entered the University of Illinois at Urbana as a freshman I took a test for the Math Honors Program. The test consisted of three problems one of which one needed to solve to pass the test. A straightforward solution to the problems required a course in mathematics one level beyond what one had taken in high school. I only got as far as analytic geometry at my small Catholic high school and so a straight forward solution to the problems required knowledge of calculus. Of course you did not need to reinvent the calculus, but you did need to invent some aspect of the ideas that led to the creation of the calculus. A thorough understanding of the mathematics one had studied was not enough to pass the test. One had to come up with a creative approach to the problem.

This is one approach to testing for intuitive talent. Can one extend what one has learned to solve problems that do not have a straightforward solution? When I taught a course in logical design at UCLA I included a question that most students missed even though it was a `who is buried in Grant's tomb?' type of question. One can construct logical circuits like those described in Section 5.3 with multiple levels of logic. The outputs of lower levels are inputs to higher levels as shown in Table 5.2. If one has a truth table for such a circuit one can construct the minimal two level solution, i. e. the one that has the fewest logical operators: AND/OR. The problem started with the diagram of a logical circuit. There were three parts to the problem. First construct the truth table for the circuit. Second construct the minimal two level circuit that implements the truth table. Third note that the circuit you constructed has more logical elements than the original circuit. Explain how it can be the minimal two level solution. The answer was that the original circuit had three levels.

Why did so many students miss this obvious answer? I think it is because they are not taught to make connections. They are taught to apply methods. If you are exploring possible connections than the phrase `minimal two level circuit' suggests that a three

level circuit gives you more options to try and might be better than a two level solution.

Intuition is always making connections and seeing possibilities. Invariably most of these connections and possibilities are meaningless, nonsense or false. But that is how intuition must work. If it is constrained by what makes sense logically than it cannot do its job.

Intellect and other functions are needed to evaluate the work of intuition, but they must not limit the scope of its functioning. Often that is precisely what we are taught in formal education.

After all intuition can be extremely distracting. Instead of focusing minds on the material at hand it leads off in all directions. We need the discipline of focus, but we equally need the discipline of intuitive rambling. We need to give space for and encouragement to both. Formal education almost universally discourages intuitive wandering. No doubt one of the effects of Ritalin widely prescribed to children for `Attention Deficit Disorder' is to weaken intuition.

My Key Lesson: Your Mind Shapes Your Reality, Always How often have you found yourself staring into blank space, fantasizing a life that’s filled with bliss and happiness, only to realize moments later that your life is far from where you want it to be?

We look at happy and successful people and think how lucky they are to have it all.

You may be wondering, “Why can’t my life be like theirs?” Or rather, “Why can’t I be as lucky?”

What many people seldom realize is that successful people are people who take responsibility and risks and make decisions in their life so that they can be “luckier” and lead a life of bliss and happiness.

And that’s exactly what the American Monk MindBox can help you achieve. When you control your mind, you shape your reality.

Everyone has the same innate abilities to get in touch with their spiritual self (perhaps you already sense this) but just don’t know how to get started. It’s so simple, really. In fact… if you had the right teacher, you could get a jumpstart with your own abilities.

I am on a mission to make it possible for everyone who is interested to learn to awaken the voice of their soul to do so, no matter where they live, and on their own schedule, at their own pace and in a way that is affordable.

THREE COMPONENTS TO DEVELOPING INUITION There are three components to developing intuition. First is providing the personal material in terms of learning and life experience that intuition uses. Next is exercising the intuitive muscle by using intuition. This should involve both random rambling and focused problem solving. The problems must always be ones for which one knows no canned intellectual approach. It is a challenge to create such problems. One cannot give a standardized test for intuition because one can always educate for the test.

Finally there is the need to develop the archetypal images that intuition relies on. The best of Fairy Tales is one way to do this for small children.

Astrology, the I Ching and Tarot are examples of ancient methods of developing intuition. They focus on archetypal images. They describe the seeds of transformation that exist in a current state. They are immersed in superstition. No attempt has been made to integrate them with scientific understanding or to create similar new forms that are compatible with contemporary science. This is particularly difficult because archetypal material have a numinous chthonic aspect.

How can we develop intuition, let it lead the way and yet hold it back from leaping into the abyss. For intuition to become more universal it must become more developed and differentiated. We must know when and how to use it and we must know with some, albeit imperfect, reliability when it leads us too far afield from what is practically possible.

The one sided culture I am so critical of has provided one important tool for this. The computer allows us to create artificial universes to play with ideas and refine our intuition. I can learn complex technical material best if I can program it and play with the program. A mass of equations without the opportunity to make them alive in a computer is virtually meaningless to me.

It is not that I am unable to understand them, but the mode that I can understand them has to involve an element of playfulness and has to be tolerant of many silly errors which I continuously make. Although a computer is completely intolerant of mistakes, it allows as many tries as you are willing to make to get it right.

Intuition is not as quick as intellect but it is deeper. Intellect can easily grasp things as a series of complex operations. This is impossible for intuition. Intuition must know how the operations relate to each other and to a host of similar operations that are already understood. This takes time and it takes playing with ideas. For complex systems this is impossible without a computer to handle the details. Of course there is no intuitive only or intellectual only learning. All learning involves sequences of steps, playing with ideas and relating new ideas to old ones. The difference is one of emphasis.

The computer combined with communication technology is a powerful aid to intuition in another way. It can create learning and dialog networks of people concerned about a particular issue. The misnamed newsgroups on Internet serve this purpose. Although

they do contain some news the vast majority of traffic involves networks of people exchanging ideas and learning from each other material that is far from new. For me this was an effective way to learn the language and some of the technical content of quantum mechanics. It helped me to extend my ideas and put them in a context that others could more easily understand.

Technology can change the value of human talents. Gauss had an advantage over his colleagues in being a skilled calculator. That was an important asset for a mathematician in his time, but is of little use today. No matter how good a calculator you are you can buy a better one for a few dollars.

Computer technology allows us to automate many of the simpler intellectual skills such as calculation. Inevitably this lowers the value of those skills while opening new possibilities to those with different skills. We are just beginning to understand what can be done and still view this opportunity too narrowly. We want to automate mathematical proofs so we try to create completely automated theorem provers. We want to automate chess so we make a computer program that can beat a grand master. Technology is far from being able to replace the human mind. The enormous calculating power of modern computers is sufficient to defeat the best of human chess players with the brute force methods that such chess programs use. That is not the way to make the best chess player. To do that combines the special skills of the computer with the subtle skills of the human. Let the human use a computer program to aid play just as you let a student use a calculator during a physics exam. The best computer aided chess player will almost certainly not be the same person as the best unaided chess player.

Finding the worlds best computer aided chess player may not be important to cultural development, but effectively using the computer to amplify human mental skills is. This is starting to happen with intuitive graphical user interfaces, programs to do mathematical analysis as well as computation and tools for scientific visualization.

However we must recognize how primitive our understanding is. People with powerful intuition that have played a major role in science like Einstein and Jung are usually in Jung's terminology thinking types. Their greatest strength is their powerful intuition, but it is only through the dominance of intellect that they are able to digest the fruits of that intuition to a form that can be appreciated by our intellectually dominated culture.

To get beyond this stage is no small task. We have regressed in the institutional structures to develop intuition since the middle ages. It is not possible for anyone to say what a world with intuition and intellect in more equal roles would be like other than it will be markedly different and far richer than the world we know.

What would happen to your life if your most difficult question melted away in the warmth of an answer that touched your heart?

Intuition

Intuition is the process of perceiving or knowing things to a high degree of certainty without conscious reasoning: knowledge of events such as an act of nature that has yet to happen; or knowledge of a distant material object such as an as-yet unseen obstruction blocking the highway ahead.

Researchers who have conducted numerous controlled and scientifically validated studies over more than half a century have expanded the definition of intuition to include not only conscious perception by the mind alone, but also by the body’s entire psycho physiological system. This perception often is evidenced by a range of emotions and measurable physiological changes exhibited or detected throughout the body, according to the study Electrophysiological Evidence of Intuition: McCraty, Atkinson and Bradley, 2004.

At the center of this nonbrain perception is the human heart, which encompasses a degree of intelligence whose sophistication and vastness we are continuing to understand and explore. We now know this intelligence may be cultivated to our advantage in many ways.

Intuition is defined as knowing or sensing without the use of rational processes. This negative definition is a sign of our limited understanding of this faculty. We do not know all the dimensions of human sensation and communication. Intuition defined in this negative way may involve capacities that are not part of existing science. One aspect of this I have experienced involves staring at someone especially with some sexual energy. Many people seem to sense this. People often look directly at the person doing the staring even when there seems no way they could have sensed this.

In the absence of careful experiments it is difficult to know if one is incorrectly attributing significance to random occurrences. A recent experiment on staring [4] has produced no significant effects. However, if such an effect exists, it may be subtle, selective and easily missed by experiments not properly focused. We need to be open about such possibilities, while being skeptical of the significance of anecdotal or personal experiences. It is equally important that we be careful in not over interpreting experiments. In science it is most important to be clear about what you do not know.

Whatever other nonrational ways of knowing may be a part of` intuition, pattern recognition plays a major role. As we better understand the brains ability to find meaningful patterns and other nonrational means of knowing, we will differentiate these capacities and describe them in positive language. This chapter focuses on intuition as pattern recognition. The source of those patterns is not limited to an individual life experience. They include genetic knowledge revealed as archetypal images as described in Section 9.6.

Number and Archetype After C. G. Jung had completed his work on synchronicity in ``Synchronicity: An Acausal Connecting Principle,'' he hazarded the conjecture, already briefly suggested in his paper, that it might be possible to take a further step into the realization of the unity of psyche and matter through research into the archetypes of the natural numbers. He

even began to note down some of the mathematical characteristics of the first five integers on a slip of paper. But, about two years before his death, he handed the slip over to me with the words: ``I am too old to be able to write this now, so I hand it over to you.'' -- Marie-Louise von Franz, from the preface of Number and Time [49].

The mathematical properties of numbers are discovered, absolute and creative. At some point in time each of them may be discovered, but at any point in time only an infinitesimal fragment of them can be known. These seemingly paradoxical properties come from mathematics' concern with the potentially infinite in a universe in which everything that exists is a particular finite experience.

The archetypes have been built from an unfathomable history of experience. The details of those experiences are different, but there are structural similarities that are universal enough to find their way into our genes. The generality that makes these experiences important enough to incorporate in our genetics makes it problematic to apply the experience to specific situations. To a large degree life is a process of refining archetypal material into ideas, intuitions, art and behavior that have value in our life and times. Jung saw medieval alchemy as providing both a metaphor for this process and as an intuitive and intellectual study of the process [28, 27, 30].

Archetypal material related to sex, birth and family is among the most basic and direct.

The refinement of this archetypal material to deal with contemporary reality is extremely difficult as the immense problems we are having today in family structure confirm. The difficulty is rooted in the contradictory and competitive nature of the archetypes.

The problem is not just to refine archetype images individually to golden nuggets of practical value. Their deepest values can only be realized through a union of contradictory claims [30]. For example the competition between career and family that creates so many problems is a real one. It does not have a solution. The problem is a creative force that can lead us to a deeper development of self or to destruction.

Intuition as pattern recognition Pattern recognition like intuition has a vague definition. We know what it means to recognize a face, but we cannot explain how we do it. Intuition is like that. An idea or solution to a problem pops into our mind, but we have no idea where it came from.

Intuition is often perceived as an external force. A writer may speak of the characters in her novel as creating their own story.

We have recently developed two technologies for pattern recognition, neural nets and genetic algorithms that do not use rational or deductive processes.

The field of neural nets originated in a desire to better understand the human nervous system and to apply that understanding. There is no precise definition of a neural net, but they generally consist of a large number of simple processors connected to near neighbors. There are input and output connections and simple algorithms determine their relationship. The networks are trained through some process that adjusts the relationship between inputs and outputs to enhance some global result. In a simple example there are weights on each of the inputs. An output level is computed as the sum of the products of a weight for each input and signal level on that input. During a

training period weights are increased on inputs with a strong signal when the system is getting closer to the desired response and decreased when it is moving away from it.

Such simple devices can be extremely effective at solving problems for which there is no simple analytical solution. Of course they do not usually produce an optimal result.

Genetic algorithms, in a very simplified way, mimic biological evolution. A population of individuals with various traits is created. They are evaluated for fitness against some criteria. Those that rank highest have their properties mixed to create the next generation. A substantial portion of automated investing uses genetic algorithms [35, p.

87].

There is no simple way to explain why a neural net or genetic algorithm produces one response rather than another. One can do a detailed analysis of the state and explain exactly why this history and input produces this response, but that does not explain why one alternative is better than another. Because intuition is a generalized pattern recognition process, you cannot break up the result into a series of steps or analyze the process for mistakes. The way you discipline and develop intuition is different then the way you develop intellect.

Neural nets and genetic algorithms are increasingly important technologies that recognize patterns without a rational deductive process. We know in complete detail what neural nets and genetic algorithms do, but we do not understand how they work in the way we understand a rational process. These processes depend on a limited uniformity in the world yet they are robust in the face of anomalies. Our concern here is not the structure of these processes or the much harder problem of understanding the structure of human intuition. We want to look at the practical questions of how we develop intuition individually and culturally.

With intuition the search for patterns often includes archetypal material. Little in our lives is fundamentally original. Almost every situation we encounter is similar to an immense number of previous situations. These similarities are not limited to the human species.

They go back through the history of evolution. For example walking past a dog that feels you are violating its territory raises instincts in the dog that are not so far removed from similar human instincts.

Many traditional approaches to developing intuition, like astrology, the I Ching and Tarot connect with archetypes. Evolution molds life to respond to recurring situations.

The I Ching [53] is a catalog of recurring life patterns. It can strengthen our awareness and sensitivity to the archetypal patterns that intuition recognizes. With a better conscious understanding we know more about what to make of these patterns and we can better focus our intuition.

Einstein's intuition Einstein is universally regarded as the greatest physicist of the 20th century. He alone was responsible for relativity and was a major contributor to quantum mechanics. These two theories have dominated twentieth century physics. Yet for most of his adult life Einstein was at odds with the majority of his colleagues about the nature of quantum

mechanics. Was this disagreement simply a matter of different opinions or was something deeper involved? Einstein was an intuitive genius. He was of course intelligent, but by no means an intellectual genius. It is no accident that he was working in the patent office when he developed special relativity. He was not considered competitively qualified for a professorial appointment until he had revolutionized our understanding of time and space.

It is worth looking closer at this quarrel. Extroverted thinking, that dominates our culture including science, draws its energy from the external facts or experimental results.

Quantum mechanics is extraordinarily successful at explaining those facts. The refinements that his colleagues made to the theory while Einstein was pursuing his futile quest for a more complete theory have made quantum mechanics, and specifically quantum field theory the most accurate theory man has ever developed by a wide margin. Certainly his colleagues had reason to complain when they accomplished so much and Einstein so little. Einstein respected the enormous achievement but felt we must start over.

There is no doubt that quantum mechanics has seized hold of a beautiful element of truth and that it will be a touchstone for a future theoretical basis in that it must be deducible as a limiting case from that basis, just as electrostatics is deducible from the Maxwell equations of the electromagnetic field or as thermodynamics is deducible from statistical mechanics. I do not believe that quantum mechanics will be the starting point in the search for this basis, just as one cannot arrive at the foundations of mechanics from thermodynamics or statistical mechanics(461)[20].

We must start over because you cannot derive a causal theory from a statistical one.

Einstein had an inner vision or intuition about what was and was not a good fundamental theory. A theory that did not match that inner vision was sadly lacking no matter how successful it became. Quantum mechanics did not match this vision and no amount of doctoring it to cover a wider range of effects or achieve greater accuracy could help. Quantum field theory, which combines special relativity and quantum mechanics, was anathema to him.

Einstein never had a good word for the relativity version of quantum mechanics knows as quantum field theory. It successes did not impress him. Once in 1912, he said of the quantum theory the more successful it is, the sillier it looks (24) [41].

His colleagues, impressed by the enormous success of quantum mechanics, did not share his view. They understood how the theory fell short of what had been accepted principles for a physical theory. Their solution was to modify these principles. Thus we have a host of interpretations of quantum mechanics each with its own special metaphysics and new principles for a fundamental theory. For the extrovert the idea must succumb to the data. For the introvert it is the opposite. Neither principle works universally. That is why an opposition is needed.

Why do I insist that the idea will ultimately win out in this contest? It is the accumulation of intuitive problems with the theory. They are what make the theory look sillier the more successful it becomes. The problems are listed in Section 8.8. Beyond this intuition is able

to consider possibilities that intellect cannot deal with. Intuition is always ready to start over. Intellect is loathed to do so because without its existing conceptual framework it is lost. It has nothing to orient itself with.

For intellect to precede in physics it must have or work out the mathematics in some detail. Intuition can play with ideas at a looser level. Intuition can leave the conceptual framework of classical particles that quantum mechanics is trapped in. Without knowing the details it can match patterns and see where connections are possible in a different framework. Of course this process is far more error prone then a more narrow intellectual approach, but for many problems it is the only possible approach.

"The only real valuable thing is intuition." —Albert Einstein, 1879-1955

The dawning age of intuition In Jungian theory the process of individuation or becoming an individual is that of developing and differentiating ones psychic capacities to create an integrated whole or self that is adapted to both external reality and the creative life forces one has inherited genetically. Central to this process is the development of the often inherently conflicting forces of the attitude-types and function-types described in Section 10.2.

The greatest difficulty in this process is developing the function that is the opposite of one's dominant function. Thinking and feeling are opposed pairs as are intuition and sensation. The opposite function-type also has the opposite attitude-type. The opposite of extroverted thinking is introverted feeling. The opposed or inferior function, because it is the least developed, is the most firmly entrenched in the raw archetypal material of the unconscious. This can give it a magical and menacing tone. The path to the inferior function is through the other pair of functions. For a thinking type this means intuition or sensation. Because these functions are not in direct opposition to the dominant function they are not so difficult to develop.

Cultures also have a dominant type. They go through a process of cultural integration of more of the genetic psychic inheritance of their people. Cultural evolution is not individuation, but it comes from the individuation of its people. Western Culture is dominated by extroverted thinking. We individually and collectively project the undifferentiated elements of our psyche unto others. "And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the bean that is in thine own eye?"

Projection serves the purpose of making us aware of personal issues in a way we can deal with. That purpose is only served if we can move beyond the projection to begin to see in ourselves what seems so transparent in others. This process can cause a great deal of harm before it achieves its natural ends. Projections can give energy to the inferior elements of those we project our own inferior elements onto. This is especially true if we are in a position of power or dominance over the target of our projection.

Because Western Culture and the United States are so dominant in the world our collective projections are capable of enormous harm.

The second half of the twentieth century provides a depressing example of this.

Communism was both a real menace and a magnet for our projections. Our zeal to combat it came not just from the real threat it posed, but also from the numinous chthonic power that we attributed to it through projections. Any crime was justified to combat such a menace. We could easily justify policies advantageous to powerful special interests that cruelly and inhumanely exploited populations of other countries.

We masked our own power grabbing cruelty by attributing such base instincts only to our adversary. As a result we supported some of the bloodiest and most evil dictators on earth. When communism collapsed through the weight of its inefficiency and corruption the horrors we helped to create remained to menace us.

The battle against terrorists is the easier part of the struggle we face. The harder part is getting beyond our projections and the horrors those projections feed. Until we do that new horrors will emerge no matter how successful we are at destroying our current real enemies. These horrors have many roots. We do not create them. We feed them. Our power can greatly amplify the corrosive forces that already exist throughout the world.

The starting point for Western cultural evolution must be the development of intuition. It is the path to integrating our inferior feeling. It is impossible to approach that task directly. Feeling and thinking are too antagonistic. One must develop culturally the complimentary functions first and intuition is the most important of these.

Developing intuition starts by realizing you have it already. If you've ever had a hunch about something, that was intuition. Intuition is just your mind using more than what you are consciously aware of. But can you trust your intuition? How do you improve it?

Developing Intuition in Three Steps 1. Recognize it and encourage it.

2. Study it to make it more trustworthy.

3. Give it good information to work with.

Gary Kasparov will admit that a computer can calculate chess positions many moves further ahead than he can. Yet he still beats the best computers out there because of his intuitive grasp of the game. His experience allows him to combine analysis with a "sense" of which move is best. Try to find areas in your own life where you intuitively operate.

Of course, intuition is also a warning device. Both my wife and I felt we shouldn’t get on that bus in Ecuador. This is no psychic power. Crowded busses are prime locations for pickpockets. A drunken man was bumping into people repeatedly. We didn't consciously pay attention, but these things registered in our minds, warning us. We felt "something isn't right here." When we ignored our intuition, I was robbed.

When I bought a conversion van, I saw them all over. Maybe you've had a similar experience. Looking for and recognizing a thing trains your mind to find more of it. The same process will happen if you watch for your intuition - you'll start to see more of it.

Unfortunately, a strong hunch can be for irrelevant reasons too. If you were hit by a yellow taxi as a child, you might have "intuitive" hunches not to get into yellow taxis for the rest of your life. So even learning to recognize your intuition and encourage it may leave you wondering when to trust it.

Study Your Intuition Start questioning your hunches. If we had asked why we felt bad about that bus, it may have occurred to us, "Oh yeah, crowded busses are a bad idea - we know that." Study your strong feeling about that taxi, and you might say, "Oh, it's just my fear of yellow taxis." Get in the habit of paying attention to and studying your intuitive feelings.

Where does your intuition work best? If you're always right about your intuitive stock picks, give a little credence to them. On the other hand, if your hunches about people are usually wrong, don't follow them. Just pay attention more, and you'll be developing intuition about your intuition.

Give Your Intuition Good Information Your skill, knowledge and experience determine the potential effectiveness of your intuition. No weak chess player will never intuitively beat that computer, like Kasparov can. Learn enough about a subject, before expecting good hunches about it - or before trusting the hunches. Work in the area you want more intuition in. When enough information is in your mind, it will go to work for you with or without your conscious participation, so feed it well.

Recognize your intuition and you'll have hunches and ideas more often. Study it and you'll learn when to trust it. Give it good information and you'll be repaid with good hunches and ideas. This is the simple formula for developing intuition.

Manage Stress by Knowing What You Value Much has been written about “stress management” techniques that are primarily behavioral in nature — such as getting adequate sleep, regular exercise, and mental downtime; taking vacation; doing controlled breathing; practicing yoga or mindfulness meditation; or getting acupuncture treatments. But relatively little has been written recently on the benefits of self-disciplined articulation of a philosophical worldview and core values that help us weather the storms and devastations that inevitably rock our lives and careers.

The value of self-reflection and self-awareness is well known in both Eastern and Western philosophical traditions. The exhortation from Socrates to “Know Thyself” reverberates across the history of philosophy, as a reminder to reflect on our life’s mission and the strategies we use to attain it. Confucius similarly urged the individual to engage in self-disciplined reflection upon one’s values, followed by action steps to implement those values in interpersonal settings. Management of complexity and stress in the Socratic and Confucian traditions depends heavily upon self-awareness, an ethical value system, and a capacity to act on core values (such as kindness and humility) in social relations.

While this ancient wisdom hardly requires validation from empirical science, contemporary cognitive psychology and neuroscience research interestingly reveal how self-reflection manifests itself in our brains and behaviors. Recent neuroimaging research shows that self-reflection lights up the brain’s anterior and posterior cingulate cortex (ACC), which is linked to regions that mediate emotion and decision-making.

Cognitive psychology research shows that one of the most effective methods for reducing stress is to engage in self-reflection directed toward appraising it as a challenge rather than a threat.

Stress Don’t let it get the better of you.

In overwhelming and frightening moments, stress can be prevented or managed by self-disciplined contemplation of core values and goals. Religious individuals consider this a turn toward God, while secular individuals may think of it as a turn toward their “highest good.”

Work diligently toward self-awareness and maintain a steadfast focus on honorable goals and ethical principles – even as stressful uncertainties, risks, threats, and instability swirl about you. When confronted by frightening situations such as a job loss and financial setback, carefully appraise your core strengths and resources, rather than panicking or disconnecting from reality.

Ask for help.

Humbly seek and accept help from others, maintain an open mind about next steps, and develop rational action plans to care for those who rely on you. Many executive coaching clients use this approach successfully.

In my own coaching practice, I ask clients open-ended questions about their philosophy of the “good life,” or what the ancient Greeks called eudemonia (eudaimonia). The conversations that ensue help clients to define the fundamental values and goals that underlie their careers and personal life decisions. These conversations can be deepened by the completion of style assessments that focus specifically on human motivators, such as the Individual Directions Inventory (IDI). The IDI is a well-validated and useful tool for assessing personal preferences and values, such as social affiliation and irreproachability.

Individual Directions Inventory™ © Management Research Group® 51300074 AFFILIATING Giving: Gaining satisfaction from relating to others by providing them with support, affection, and empathy Receiving: Gaining satisfaction from relating to others in order to receive support, affection, and empathy from them Belonging: Gaining satisfaction from relating to others by developing mutual bonds of loyalty, cooperation, and friendship Expressing: Gaining satisfaction from relating to others by expressing oneself in a direct, spontaneous, and emotionally uninhibited fashion ATTRACTING Gaining Stature: Gaining satisfaction from obtaining social rewards such as recognition, status and respect as the result of social skills, achievements and/or activities Entertaining: Gaining satisfaction from obtaining social rewards such as admiration and visibility by using personal charisma and talent to enliven situations and entertain people PERCEIVING Creating: Gaining satisfaction from being imaginative and original and perceiving one’s world in an innovative and creative manner Interpreting: Gaining satisfaction from seeking intellectual stimulation and perceiving one’s world in a logical, analytical and non-emotional manner MASTERING Excelling: Gaining satisfaction from challenging oneself and pushing for ever-higher levels of achievement Enduring: Gaining satisfaction from demonstrating persistence, determination and tenacity Structuring: Gaining satisfaction from controlling one’s environment through the use of organization, precision, and thoroughness.

CHALLENGING Maneuvering: Gaining satisfaction from actively seeking and pursuing opportunities in the environment and turning them to one’s advantage Winning: Gaining satisfaction from acting in a forceful, aggressive, and directly competitive manner in order to win Controlling: Gaining satisfaction from being in charge, having power and authority, influencing and controlling people and events MAINTAINING Stability: Gaining satisfaction from minimizing risk by maintaining a predictable, safe and consistent environment Independence: Gaining satisfaction from being self-reliant and staying free of external controls on personal autonomy Irreproachability: Gaining satisfaction from ascribing to and striving towards ideal behavior and a personal code which places one beyond reproach Attaining Clarity Attaining clarity on core values and a philosophical worldview helps individuals develop steadiness in the face of stressful events. They embody what Stoic philosophers, such as Marcus Aurelius, championed centuries ago: use of contemplative self-reflection and development of virtuous character traits to withstand stress and uncertainty. They become leaders who show others how to embrace eternal values regardless of current circumstances.

I encourage coaching clients to develop an effective and sustainable method for engaging in philosophical self-reflection, such as daily journaling or thinking regularly on these questions during an already scheduled, convenient, mundane activity (such as while brushing their teeth). Their self-reflection helps them to identify and reinforce their self-chosen core principles — such as being kind, gentle, humble, respectful, and generous. Later on, they can intentionally draw upon their self-reflective stance when striving to avert a crisis or manage a stressful life event.

My client Melanie is an example. She came to me after years of maneuvering to be promoted to a C-suite role didn’t pan out, and after having an affair with a man she met on a business trip. She felt burned out, unproductive at work, and irritable with colleagues. Our conversations led her to realize that much of her stress was related to her infidelity — both to her husband and to her current job role. Melanie came to see that she valued her current job and had taken it for granted, believing a promotion would improve her life.

After deepening her self-reflection about her fundamental values, she decided to make fidelity to her self-chosen life roles as a VP and a wife her top priority. She adopted the motto of the U.S. Marines — semper fidelis (always faithful). This steadfast decision about how to conduct her life going forward resulted directly from thoughtful self-reflection on the values and principles that were the underpinning of her entire life structure.

Everyone can benefit from this kind of disciplined and sustained self-reflection — both as a good thing in itself and as a powerful stress management tool. Nowhere is this truer than in stressful business situations, where it can be incredibly challenging to pause and reflect on essential values. So we ought to make a special effort to incorporate philosophical self-reflection as a meaningful, yet convenient, part of our ordinary routine.

Potential Traps High Expectations The first common trap is high expectations. Give yourself a break! In the beginning, all you are doing is training your "intuitive muscles" to start functioning. As you grow your skill, you'll get more and more "hits" (correct answers). Have some patience with yourself.

Second-Guessing The second common trap is second-guessing. You'll get an intuitive idea, and then your intellect pops in and tells you, "Hey, you might be wrong, guess again!" If you constantly second-guess your intuition, you are teaching it to NOT respond to your first request. By always using what comes to your mind first, you teach your intuition how to respond immediately to questions and requests for information.

Misinterpretation The third common trap is misinterpreting the symbols and information you get. For example, you get a picture of a cruise ship, and you think it means you are going on a cruise soon. The intuition speaks to us in symbol and metaphor. We need to decipher these, and the literal interpretation is often guided by your own views of what that symbol means. Instead of trying to interpret things at first, simply describe what you see, hear or sense (called "witnessing the information"). Soon, you'll learn the language of symbol and metaphor that your intuition uses, and can interpret information more accurately.

Forgetting to Ask the Second Question The fourth common trap is that we don't ask the "second question." For example, we ask our intuitive Self if we should move to a new home. In return, the intuitive Self gives us a picture of a man running down a highway at a high speed, away from your viewpoint. Instead of taking that as a "no", ask THE SYMBOL what it is trying to tell you.

It's possible that it means you're running away from a problem by moving. In the same example, let's say your intuitive Self gives a resounding "Yes! Move!" message. Ask the second question: "When would this be best to take place?"

"What would be a good area to move to?"

"Will there be any problems I should be prepared for?"

When getting in touch with your intuitive Self, ask your questions as if you were a news reporter. Get all the facts. Ask deep, probing questions. Get to the source of the problem, if there is one.

Work Life Balance

Being busy with work and life can still include maintaining a balance.

Many people think that maintaining a work-life balance is primarily based around cutting out activities from one's schedule. Indeed, setting priorities, simplifying your schedule, and learning time management techniques are all a significant part of worklife balance, in that these steps may be required to minimize the "work" portion enough to allow the "life" component to have a balanced role. However, even those who have a heavy amount of work requirements that cannot be eliminated can maintain a comfortable level of work-life balance--it's an ongoing endeavor.

The Key to "Balance" Maintaining a work-life balance isn't a static goal--maintaining balance means having the flexibility to constantly shift when necessary so that you can accommodate life's unexpected challenges without experiencing burnout, excessive anxiety, depression, or other negative effects of too much stress. When we have too many obligations that require energy, time, and other internal resources, we can approach burnout. But when we live a life geared toward avoiding all such obligations when possible, we risk having a life devoid of meaning and satisfaction. (To find out why, see this article on eustress, and this one on gratifications.) One important key to balancing between maintaining a life of overwhelming activity and a life of not enough meaning and excitement is to balance the amount of time and energy you spend on activities that feel like work with activities that nourish you and feel like play.

Here are a few different ways to accomplish this, which we'll explore in the next pages.

Engage in Leisure Activities When people think of work-life balance, leisure time is often the first thing that comes to mind, as it should. There is research behind the idea that leisure time promotes stress management and stress management activities can increase productivity and resource-building, so it's important to make time to do things we find enjoyable and relaxing. Read more about why it's important to find time for leisure activities, and how to make time for these relaxing activities that make us more balanced inside and out.

See Where You Can Multitask Multitasking was once seen as the magic ticket to time management: a great way to virtually double one's available time. Then it became known that we are actually less efficient when trying to do two things at once and would be often better off singletasking both activities than trying to combine two things at once, particularly when both demand a high degree of attention. There are, however, times when multitasking can work well, and these are the times to identify and utilize!

It's often helpful to pair two tasks that don't take a lot of focus, such as listening to an audiobook and cleaning house, or reviewing one's to-do list and schedule while waiting in line at the store. Multitasking may not be something that works all the time, but it shouldn't be discounted entirely, either; it just takes a little thought to plan it into your schedule. Here's what to think about when you're thinking about multitasking.

Look At Priorities for Work-Life Balance One of the more important ways you can maintain work-life balance is to cut out unnecessary obligations. Chances are, you don't have anything in your life that doesn't seem entirely necessary at this point, and that's understandable. However, in thinking about what you could cut out if you needed to, it's helpful to think about the following: Examine your priorities: is it connected to a core goal? Is it vital to one of the most important aspects of your life? • What are your feelings about your commitments: which ones drain your energy and which ones feed it? • What would happen if you cancelled a given commitment: what's the costbenefit analysis? Is it worth the time it takes from other potentially important activities in your life, including exercise, time spent with family and friends, and leisure activities you wish you could enjoy?

Here are some more things to think about in examining your priorities.

Delegate When Possible Delegating tasks is something that comes naturally to some and very uncomfortably to others, so it's a somewhat under-used strategy for some of those who could benefit from it the most. Delegating tasks--asking others to take on some of your workload--can take many forms. Can you offer trades with anyone, where you handle some of their workload that you enjoy more, and they handle some of yours?

Can you hire it out? Are there people who would be willing to pitch in if you asked them? Think about what tasks in your life need doing, and which could be done by someone other than you. Read more about delegating tasks, and see what you can delegate.

Plug Your Energy Drains Life coaches help their clients get their lives into a more streamlined, functional state, and one of the more important ways they do this is to help clients identify and manage their tolerations--those things in life that drain our energy on a daily basis. Your tolerations, or energy drains, may take the form of difficult people you must deal with (but could avoid, if you tried), messy rooms (which suck up your time when you lose something, but could be cleaned in an afternoon), or many other things that chip away at your available energy.

If you have several tolerations in your life, you may want to take a day or two to identify them and eliminate them. Once they've been minimized, you'll have more energy for other things, and more balance in your life.

Introduce Gratifications Gratifications: Drawing is a great hobby that helps you to express your creativity and relieve stress.

Taking on new activities can fill up your schedule, but it can also fill you with life satisfaction. Gratifications are such activities; they take some time and energy, but leave us feeling happier and less stressed. Gratifications are pastimes that utilize our strengths and creativity in just the right way, leaving us fulfilled and making the time fly by. Read more about gratifications, and how to get more of them in your life.

As your stress levels are minimized and your sense of fulfillment is maximized, you'll be glad you did.

Intuitive Skills: Below, we give you some vocabulary words and exercises which can help get you started. There is also a list of links that might take you off in pursuit of your own intuition education, as well a list of recommended books on the subject.

Below are some vocabulary terms which might help you to understand which skills you already possess, and which you'd like to strengthen.

Note that there is a distinct difference between a skill and the application of that skill.

Not all Intuition Development instructors and books will use this same vocabulary in the same way, but once you understand the basic meanings, the words chosen by the instructor or author will not matter.

Clairvoyance Sometimes referred to as "psychic vision". Clairvoyance is the ability to see people, objects, scenes, words and symbols in your inner psychic eye. I also include aura reading in this category: the ability to see someone's subtle energy levels manifested in either colors or waves of light appearing to come from the body. Often when working with seekers on the telephone or online, I can see their physical body and can describe with almost complete accuracy their hair and eye color, height, body type and other physical attributes that I "see" in my psychic eye (sometimes called the Third Eye).

Clairaudience Also referred to as "psychic hearing". Clairaudience is the ability to hear words, phrases, songs in your ears without anyone actually speaking. This is one of the most difficult skills to develop because only a small percentage of us are hearing-based naturally (about 15-20%). Writers, musicians and other communicators seem to have this ability more readily available to them because they work with words and sounds in their everyday life. Some Intuitives I know hear whole dialogues in their inner psychic ear and can repeat verbatim the conversation to the seeker in a reading.

Clairsentience Sometimes called "psychic feeling". There are two forms of clairsentience: empathy and psychic knowing. Clairsentience is the ability to "know" about someone or something without the use of the five senses for input. Clairsentience is probably the most common type of intuitive ability. (Often we refer to it as a Hunch, a Gut Reaction, or Instinct.) For instance, often in a reading, I know the emotional state of the seeker and the topic that is most important to them, without having exchanged anything more than "hello's". Yes, some of the input could be the look on their face, the way they hold their body, the tone of their voice. There's nothing wrong with using your five other senses to help the person.

Application of Intuitive Skills: •

Psychometry

•

Mind Reading/Soul Reading

•

Telepathy

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Healing/Medical Intuition

•

Mediumship

•

Channeling

•

Dowsing

•

Guided Imagery

•

Past Life Regression

• • •

• •

• • •

Dowsing Guided Imagery Past Life Regression

Solo Exercises for Intuition Development

By Karyn Greenstreet copyright © 1994, by Karyn Greenstreet. All rights reserved The idea behind many of these exercises is to open your mind to new possibilities. The purpose of these exercises it to "train" your intuition, much like you'd train a muscle to do a certain task.

When we tell ourselves over and over again that we can't do something, we are making that our reality. So instead of saying you have no intuitive skills, try to expand the

way you do things to incorporate new ways, new ideas, and new beliefs. This will help you accept the abilities once you begin to work with them.

Be aware when doing exercises that your mood, distractions and time of day can have an effect.

AN INTUITIVE TIP: Try this Quick Coherence® technique to shift your emotional state and send positive emotions through your system.

Heart focus: Shift your attention to the area of your heart and breathe slowly and deeply.

Heart breathing: Keep your focus in the heart by gently breathing – 5 seconds in and 5 seconds out – through the area of your heart. Do this two or three times.

Heart feeling: Activate and sustain a genuine feeling of appreciation or care for someone or something in your life. Focus on the good heart feeling as you continue breathing through the area of your heart.

"There's nothing I have to have, there's nothing I have to do, and there is nothing I have to be, except exactly what I am being right now".

Do you feel trapped in the chains of repeating patterns, rigid mindsets, & emotional beliefs? Would you like to understand the repetitive patterns that you hold?

Through the use of this moving expansive meditation you will be shown how to detach, to free yourself from mental & emotional patterns that may be negatively impacting upon your life. Create a shift in your surface beliefs & begin a cycle of deep, healing and positive change in your life.

Wonderful to use if your life appears repetitive, relationship and recurring issues, communication difficulties, personality clashes, unable to move forward and rigid core beliefs. Intuition can help us get more in touch with our authentic self, as well as guide us in the best direction. Intuition can be developed gradually through some basic exercises, as follows: To begin, always start with centering yourself: relaxed breathing, grounding, with a request to open to information for the highest good of all.

As you get better using your intuition, the routine will kick in more automatically.

Here are some of the things we can do: Spend time with loved ones rather than with TV or a book; meditate and do yoga as well as work out at the gym; self-nurture as well as work; be creative rather than bored. These are vital activities of the soul.

To that end, here are some solo exercises to try:

1. Change your daily routine. Do things in a different order and different pace.

Change your morning routine. Drive to work or to the store by a different route.

Change the way you eat your meal. Remain aware of how you feel about expanding and changing your routines. What happens when you do this? How does it make you feel?

2. Each day, guess what mail will be in your mailbox. Guess the number of total items, and then break them down to advertisements, personal letters, bills, etc.

Don't worry about being right or wrong...don't attach that much importance to the exercise. Simply ask yourself, "What mail do I have here today?" Try not to second-guess yourself or to analyze your answers. When you have an answer, ask yourself, "Does this feel RIGHT?" "Is this true?" Hear the answer from within.

3. Guessing Colors. With a deck of playing cards, hold them face down in your hand. Stare at the first card, and then close your eyes. Guess what color it will be: black or red. Write down your guesses for each card (include the date and time you did the exercise). Look for patterns in your answers. If, for example, you always pick the color of the NEXT card, you'll need to make an adjustment.

When you're ready, try the same exercise with the suits.

4. Feeling Energy...When doing intuition work, it is important to be able to literally feel or sense your own and others' energy. Using your hands is one of the most reliable ways to get a good reading on energy. Try this exercise on yourself and others: a. While standing, pass your hand (palm towards the body) from the top of your head to your pelvic area. Note any areas that feel different. The most common feelings will be those of excessive heat or cold, tingling, or a kind of "dense" feeling as if passing through thicker air. Note the locations of the energy centers. b. Usually, heat or density indicate an excess or blockage of energy in that area of the body, often caused by mental, physical, emotional, or spiritual situations which are manifesting themselves in that particular energy area of the subtle anatomy. A coldness or lightness often indicates a deficiency in energy in that area. c. So what use is this test of blockages and deficiencies? It helps the intuitive person to have a clear channel when working. Balancing blockages and deficiencies in the body, mind and spirit assist the intuitive person in receiving clear messages and contacting at a deeper level. When testing the seeker for energy, oftentimes the intuitive persons can sense, intuitively, the root of the problem by knowing where the energy is either blocked or deficient. CHAKRA JOURNEY - This meditation was created to stimulate, cleanse & energize the seven main energy centers of the body. The purpose being to release blocked energy created by old unhealed memories, hurts, angers and negativity. Working with these energy centers will bring about an increase in energy levels, a feeling of lightness and freshness will occur and a sense of well-being and ease will be present. This meditation is a perfect choice for those who wish to work with healing issues, who feel lethargic and are unable to be productive and creative.

5. Tire-Clock - With a piece of chalk, mark the 12:00 position on a tire of your car.

When you arrive at your destination, before looking at the chalk mark, try to guess which "time" position the chalk mark ended up.

6. Each day pay attention to your subtle, inner voice and your body reactions that have an immediate response to a situation or a person. This voice or body reaction may caution you about something, offer advice, tell you something about a person or situation you wouldn't otherwise know. It could be about taking a certain route, parking in a particular space, avoiding something or someone, or receiving insight in how to communicate with someone. Often we ignore these little feelings, but I am asking you now to note them and to make note of them, in writing. Observe yourself. See what your feelings, body, intuition are telling you and where you feel it in your body.

7. Secondly, note how your intellect interacted with, and responded to, your intuition: did you tell it to be quiet, or make fun of it, disbelieve it, shove it aside and replace what you think makes more "sense?"

8. Did you follow your gut instinct, your intuition, in spite of what would more commonly make sense? How did it turn out? Was your intuition more accurate or less accurate? If less accurate, examine potential reasons for being less accurate. Was something else influencing your thoughts? Doubt?

9. Make written brief notes about your intuitions and the outcome of either following them, or not following them. What does this say about yourself?

10. Practice safely blocking off one of your senses, such as sight or sound, and use your other senses to see what you can pick up in terms of an object, energies, colors, information, emotions. Put your hands close to a plant and its leaves and see if you can feel its energy. Can you tell if a glass is becoming full while pouring a liquid into it if your eyes are closed?

11. Practice new ways of doing everyday things. Change hands for a task. Reverse the order of something. If you put on your right shoe first, switch it to your left shoe first. Alternate your daily routine. Getting out of the habit of doing everything exactly the same way will open up your intuitive abilities because it breaks you out of a rut, expands your experiences, and lets you feel life in a new way. Note how your body responds to a change in your routines.

12. Give yourself a little test. See if you can guess what someone will say before they say it, or if you know the outcome of a game show when it's half-way through, for instance.

13. Pay attention to how your body tells you that you are right on target. There is a definite difference between true "knowing� and "guessing." Not knowing something for certain leaves you with a feeling of emptiness or jitteriness, you don't feel solid or centered. When you really know the information you receive is accurate, you feel confident and strong.

14. Just because you may have insight into things that does not make you solely responsible for anyone other than yourself, or the outcome of a situation. Nor does it give you permission to manipulate others or abuse your intuitive abilities.

(Just remember what goes around, does come around.) You have to also realize that what you receive might contain symbolism - so you have to figure out how to decipher the symbols for yourself. When you are focusing on what is for the

highest good for yourself and others, your Higher Self, your intuition, will tell you the best course of action to take.

Close Your Eyes and Create “Don’t try to present your art by making other people read or hear or see or touch it; make them feel it. Wear your art like your heart on your sleeve and keep it alive by making people feel a little better. Feel a little lighter. Create art in order for yourself to become yourself and let your very existence be your song, your poem, your story. Let your very identity be your book. Let the way people say your name sound like the sweetest melody.” ― Charlotte Eriksson Creating to music can be a wonderful thing. It can be especially interesting when you allow yourself to be moved by the music, to respond to what you hear.

The following exercise is a wonderful way play with sound and creating intuitively.

The Exercise: Have a pen and piece of paper ready and get into a comfortable position. Take a few deep breaths to center and ground yourself, then begin the music. Let the music play for a moment, then put pen to paper and close your eyes. As the music plays, let your pen move freely across the paper. Move it in response to the music and let your hand move whichever way it wants to go. Don't think about the end result, just let go.

You can do this for the whole music piece or just for 30 seconds, depending on how much time you have to play with. Letting the drawing go for the whole song can be a wonderful exercise, but do as much as you can.

When the music has stopped, take a deep cleansing breath and open your eyes. Take a moment to look at what you've scribbled. Do you see anything there? Maybe a face? A monster? A house? A fish? Or maybe a tree? Whatever you see there, take a moment to bring it out. You can color it in or just make it more clear. The image here is an example of what happened when I developed the image with colored pencil.

Often the symbols that pop up through an exercise like this relate to something going on in our lives or have some kind of message for us. Sometimes they don't. But either way, it's fun to play with. You could do some journal writing or dialoguing with the symbols that come up for you and see what they have to say or develop your doodle further with some paint.

This is a fabulous way to get started if you're feeling particularly stuck creatively. It takes all the pressure off of performing (your eyes are closed, so what can you do?) and allows a more intuitive response to come forward. Plus, it's just fun!

Art Picnics will help you: * Get grounded and connect with your intuition. * Let go and get playful with your art. * Get creative support to help you unblock and create freely. * Have a blast creating your own, unique Art Picnic experience! * Leave with all the tools you need to continue creating your own Art Picnics. * Take excellent care of yourself by scheduling in some all-important creativity time.

Upcoming Art Picnics!

Sign up here for the August 22nd workshop.

Saturday, August 22nd, 2009, 1 - 3 p.m. EST (Find out what time that is where you live here.)

Only $25!

Get on the mailing list to be the first to know about future Art Picnic Classes.

What is an Art Picnic? An art picnic is a fun, gremlin-quieting way to get past your fears and get creating.

I started having art picnics at a time in in my life when I was feeling stuck creatively. I was frozen in the fear of not being good enough. And as much I ached to create, I couldn't get past that annoying inner critic chatting in my ear.

I needed a way to bring the joy back into my creating and a no-pressure environment where I could let go and play. Something about indoor picnics have always been fun

for me - so instead of setting up my artwork on an easel, I laid blankets and pillows down on the floor, surrounded myself with art supplies, and let myself go.

With a few simple tools, which I'll share with you in this class, I learned how to move beyond my fears and create from a place of joy, freedom, and authenticity.

How does an Art Picnic Class work? Art Picnic classes happen partly on a teleconference line (to check in before and after) and partly on your own. The experiences lasts 2 hours total -- During the first half hour, we will meet, discuss the tools you need to get started, and do a grounding exercise. We will then get off the phone and have our individual art picnic experiences. I will be playing and creating too, but I will also stay on the bridge line, so if you get stuck, you can call in and I will help you through it. In the final half hour, we will meet to discuss what we created, share what came up for us, and learn some tools to keep our creative energy flowing.

Joining an Art Picnic class will help you to schedule in this important creative time for yourself. I know for myself, when I commit to showing up in a group setting like this, I'm more likely to do it! And if you get totally stuck at any point during the hour you're creating, you can call back in to the bridgeline and get some help from me.

Bonuses Woohoo! Bonuses!

Bonus #1: An mp3 recording of a grounding exercise to use before you create that will help you get centered, out of your head, and into your body.

Bonus #2: An art picnic handout with all the info you need to have your own art picnics alone or with friends!

F.A.Q.'s What do I need to participate?

A phone (long distance charges may apply) and a desire to get playful and spend time creating! Picnic basket is not required.

How do I prepare for the call?

Before the call, prepare your space, so that after checking in, it will be all ready for you to dive in. You can prepare by setting up your art picnic space with a comfortable place for you to sit and your art supplies spread out within easy reach.

Recommended picnic supplies: If you'll be holding your art picnic on the floor, gather some blankets or sheets (that you don't mind getting dirty) that you can spread on the floor like a picnic blanket, and some pillows that you can sit on or prop up behind you. Make it a fun and comfortable place!

If it is not comfortable for you, you do not need to have your art picnic on the floor!

Instead, find a comfy chair and a flat surface (like a kitchen table or cleared off desk) that you can spread your supplies out on. I've also had art picnics in bed that were wonderful! Just be sure to lay out some sheets or a blanket that you don't mind getting dirty.

Have a bottle of water handy (or a cup of tea, cocoa, or glass of wine depending on the mood!) as you may get thirsty!

Recommended art supplies: Whatever you have! For my first art picnics, I started out with some magazines, a glue stick, some pens, and a sketchbook.

If you're looking for ideas, here are some of my favorite art picnic goodies: acrylic paint, watercolor paper, magazines, old books, old calendars, any collage ephemera, brown paper bags, sketchpad, pencil, erasers, glue (glue stick, yes paste, gel medium, matte medium), paint brushes and knives, scissors, markers, glitter, buttons, ribbon, charcoal,

modelling clay, wire, tracing paper, stamps, stencils, oil pastels, colored pencils, beads, etc...It's entirely up to you what you use. Just pick out some of the art supplies you enjoy using and have them available.

I started Creative Every Day Challenge in 2008 to help infuse my life and lives of others with daily creativity.

• Creativity is meant in the broadest sense, so it doesn't have to be something art related. Your creative acts could be in cooking, taking pictures, knitting, doodling, writing, dancing, decorating, singing, playing with your kids, brainstorming ideas, gardening, or making art in the form of collage, paint, or clay...or whatever!

• You do not have to post every day! I know for myself that having to post every day for a year would be too much. You can post about your creativity in whatever form you like, whether that be once a day, a few times a week, once a week, or once a month. Do what works for you!

• This is a low pressure challenge, with the idea of bringing more creativity into our lives. I will not be the creativity police. I hope that we can all find ways, simple and grand to express our creative selves. Have fun with it!

• If you'd like to join in, leave a comment on this blog post or email me (email link is in the top left sidebar) and I'll add your name to the list of participants which will reside in the sidebar of my blog.

• If you find this challenge after the 1st of January, you can still join in!

• There's info below on how to post the CED button to your blog.

What's new in 2009: • In 2009, I'm going to try out a couple new things. For one, I will be doing a monthly theme. The themes will be purely for inspirational purposes and to give some focus to anyone who needs it. You can use the monthly theme to help spur you on or ignore it. It's entirely up to you!

• January's (totally optional) theme is: Play!

• February's (totally optional) theme is: Words • March's (totally optional) theme is: Dreams • April's (totally optional) theme is: Color • May's (totally optional) theme is: Nature • June's (totally optional) theme is: Sound • I will post about the next month's theme about a week before the month starts on the Creative Every Day blog.

• I'm also going to be posting interviews with people about their creative habits, so if you have any suggestions of people you'd like to hear from, let me know!

How to Participate: • There are a variety of ways to participate. These ways are here for you to enjoy, not to pressure you, so use any or all of them as you see fit. You can post on your blog about your creative activities, you can post images on flickr, you can comment on my weekly CED blog posts with what you're up to, or use the "Mr. Linky" widget to share a link to a specific blog post or image.

• Participate in any way that makes sense for you. I think it's helpful to share with the community what you're up to as it can be incredibly fun and inspirational. But don't let it stress you out. Make it doable for you.

•

There's a flickr group for this project where you can share images of your creativity (it's not required, just another way to share and see what others are doing.) You can sign up for the flickr group for free here.

• You can post about your creativity in whatever form feels best for you. You can post about it on your blog daily, weekly, monthly or however feels best. A blog isn't even required to participate! If you don't have a blog, you can share what you're up to in the comments on my blog or on the flickr group.

• I will also be posting a weekly Creative Every Day Challenge post where you can use the "Mr. Linky" widget to post the url of your blog posts or links to images for the week. I post this every Monday. Here's an example of one of these posts so you'll know what to look for.

In case you're interested, here's the background on the challenge: I started the Creative Every Day Challenge in 2008 and I welcome anyone who is interested, to join in!

Every November, I loved the way the "Art Every Day Month" challenge (AEDM) created a great sense of community, brought people with different styles and backgrounds together, and gave me a kick in the butt to keep on creating when I might otherwise have done nothing. I'd been wanting to find a way to extend the process, but as much as I admired those who created and posted a piece of art every day of the year, I knew that would burn me out. Besides, it was not really my goal to create a piece of art every day. But I did want to be creative every day.

Originally, I was going to call my blog, "Everyday Creative" which to me means a person who is creative in their day-to-day life whether that be through making a piece of artwork or doodling on a receipt or cooking something or taking a walk to gain inspiration in the colors of nature or re-decorating a room or knitting or whatever! That domain name was taken, so I went with CreativeEveryDay.com and included Everyday Creative in the tag line. One of the things I aspire to, is to be creative every day and also to inspire creativity in others, whether that be through my blog, my art, through leading groups like AEDM, or through someday leading workshops or writing a book. I know that challenging myself in specific ways helps to keep me productive, so I'm hoping this challenge will serve as a daily reminder of what I want for myself.

I loved doing CED in 2008. I met some wonderful people and having the challenge, helped keep creativity as a focus in my daily life. I believe that what we focus on expands and that was certainly the case for me and many other participants. So I decided to continue in 2009. I created a new logo for 2009 and I've posted it above. It will also be in my sidebar along with a list of those who are participating. You don't need a blog to participate! Again, this will be a very low pressure challenge. I won't be the creativity police with you (or myself!) The idea behind it will be to encourage myself and others to find creativity in every day and in the everyday things of life. I won't post daily because I think that would be a bit too much of a burden for me, but I will post about every day's creativity in some form or another. And I'll encourage others to do the same, whether that be every day, every few days, once a week or once a month.

Throughout the year, I'll also be posting creativity tips that help me and hopefully will provide some inspiration to anyone looking to infuse their life with more creative goodness or who might need a little push to get out of a stuck place. If you have questions or want to join in, feel free to pop me an email or leave a comment on any post on my blog here.

Thanks and happy creating!

•

Posting the CED button: In order to use the Creative Every Day Challenge button, located in the sidebar (and below), simply right-click on the image (ctrl-click for mac users) and save it to your computer. Different blogging applications have different ways of adding images to your blog, but all have help sections which should be able to direct you to instructions on how to do it.

What the Heart Knows What we know today about what the heart knows is truly exciting and the implications are great. Relying on a variety of data from numerous studies and experiments, particularly heart-rhythm-pattern measurements, IHM’s findings point to the human heart as playing a key role in the intuitive process, and a recent study concludes the heart actually receives intuitive information faster than the brain – by a second or slightly more. This would seem to attribute some independent intelligence to the heart: In fact, the concept of a "heart brain" is widely accepted today.

It has been established that the heart has a powerful electromagnetic field and its own complex nervous system and circuitry that generates up to an estimated 60 times the electrical amplitude of the brain. The electromagnetic signal our heart rhythms produce actually can be measured in the brain waves of people around us. It is no wonder that the findings by researchers at HeartMath and elsewhere conclude the heart has its own organized intelligence network enabling it to act independently, learn, remember and produce feelings – all attributes which, until recently, were nearly universally held to be solely in the brain’s dominion. "… but it is wisdom to believe the heart."

—From a poem by George Santayana, 1863-1952

You and Your Intuition Sometimes I don't know what to work on next... So here's what I decided at no instant are we honestly at a loss about what steps to take, what decision to make.

Each of us is both guarded and guided by an inner voice that we occasionally tune in on, but more frequently tune out . We may have defined the inner voice as conscience. However, it's not important what we think it is or by what name we call it, its only important that we acknowledge it.

The 'inner voice' is our special intuitive connection to the spiritual realm, a network that links us all, whether we like it or not. To choose to listen to the inner messages is a ready option and it will never fail to benefit us.

As I familiarize myself with it, and trust it enough to act as directed, I feel a sense of glory in both the comfort and the sureness of the action I take. I sense that I am not alone.

Even when no other human is present, we're not alone. Always we are connected to the spirit energy that inspires us all to right action.

Every dreaded circumstance is made easier if I'm accustomed to going within for guidance. Today can run as smoothly as I want. I'll seek my inner voice.

'Every human being has, like Socrates, and attendant spirit calling and wise are they who obey its signals.' - Lydia M. Child Perhaps the knowledge that the heart possesses this intuitive intelligence doesn’t mean much for you because your experience has been that although some people seem capable of tapping into their intuition, you haven’t been able to do it. As far as you know, you’ve never experienced intuition, or it is such a rarity that you readily dismiss all such instances as mere coincidence or sheer luck. No matter, say researchers who have studied the intuitive process for decades, because the heart, like the body, is constantly engaged in activity we are not even aware of, and it keeps right on intuiting – receiving loads of information before the brain, processing it, then steering us in directions it deems beneficial to us.

What would it mean if you could fine-tune this intuitive ability? Is it even possible? Well, it could and does mean a great deal – in so many areas of your life, including the level of stress you experience, the overall health you enjoy, your creativity, the myriad choices you make daily and your success at school, work and in your relationships. The Institute of HeartMath’s extensive scientific studies indicate you can develop and enhance your intuition. In tandem with its years of research, HeartMath also has engaged in comprehensive development and testing of tools and programs to help you develop your heart’s intuitive intelligence and use it advantageously.

Respect in ourselves teaches us to be respectful of other's beliefs. Our spirit is larger than our beliefs, and more generous. I'll try to understand that everyone wishes to do what is right for themselves (See our Recommendations).

"Heart intuition or intelligence brings the freedom and power to accomplish what the mind, even with all the disciplines or affirmations in the world, cannot do if it’s out of sync with the heart."

—The HeartMath Solution, 1999, Children and Martin Our problems seem so singulair; we often feel alone with our struggles. And it's true that each of us must come to our own terms with whatever situation faces us. But no struggle facing us is free from the influence of other people and their struggles. We

have a shared destiny which is accompanied by individual perceptions and both singular and mutual responses to the ebb and flow enfolding us all. Knowing that we share this journey offers us comfort when we need it in our daily struggles. We're not alone, forgotten, unimportant to the destiny of others. Nor are others without meaning in the experiences we're gifted with. Existence is mutual, we are interdependent contributors to the total life cycle. What each of us learns eases the struggles for another. All experiences are meant for the good of us all. Today I may feel alone, but I'm not. My life is fully in concert with those around me and all is as it should be.

The Rhythm of the Heart Studies have shown that vibrations from rhythmic sounds have a profound effect on brain activity. In shamanic traditions, drums were used in periodic rhythm to transport the shaman into other realms of reality. The vibrations from this constant rhythm affected the brain in a very specific manner, allowing the shaman to achieve an altered state of mind and journey out of his or her body.

Beneath the layers of our five senses lies the Spirit. To experience the beauty within your spirit you need to place your awareness upon the heart and meditate upon it until everything that blocks your spirit is cleared. During this meditation your heart will give you council & wisdom leaving you with three things that are absolute and cannot be destroyed; AWARENESS---LOVE ---BEING. When heart-rhythm patterns are coherent they invoke a sense of relaxation, inspiration, improved buoyancy, an openness, appreciation of being, peacefulness and hope.

After years of research, the very core of HeartMath’s findings regarding the ability of human beings to improve their lives emotionally, physically and mentally is the revelation of what is known as "heart-rhythm coherence." In simple terms, here is what heart-rhythm coherence and incoherence mean, followed by a description of what happens when the heart is in or out of coherence: A coherent heart is one that has smooth, ordered heart-rhythm patterns such as might be seen in an electrocardiogram.

An incoherent heart is marked by jagged, disordered or irregular heart-rhythm patterns.

As testing has shown, events, sights, sounds and other stimuli in the environment around you contribute to your heart-rhythm patterns, and regardless of the favorability or unfavorability of these patterns, the heart transmits them to the brain for processing. This process includes storing and remembering these patterns for future use. When the brain receives emotional information, it also issues a recommended response based on past experience, which could be any or a combination of countless possibilities: an immediate physical action of some sort, a feeling of sadness, perhaps a sense of physical pain, or maybe no response at all. It all depends on what you’ve done before and what the brain remembers. When heart-rhythm patterns are coherent, the heart’s ability to perceive intuitive information is heightened. Stress chemical pathways reverse, paving the way for increased synchronization between the heart and brain. It is in this synchronized state, which athletes call being "in the zone," that you can achieve optimal mental clarity, cognitive performance and perception of intuitive information.

When you have a coherent heart, you are at your best. Are you feeling stuck, confused, experiencing low vitality, needing harmony & peace within your life. Explore through the use of energy rays a way to change your preconceived ideas, rigid structures and belief systems. Healing is not just about making things better but rather making things whole. Learn to express joy, love & creativity. Bring forth qualities of mercy, grace and love, working with the Violet flame to transform fear. This is a perfect CD for those needing to become more flexible, feeling lethargic, confused, depressive, anxious, sad, restless, angry & frustrated will all benefit.

If you are accustomed to being appreciative, caring, compassionate, etc., all of which lead to a coherent heart, the favorable heart-rhythm patterns your heart sends to the brain trigger responses to these feelings that you’ve had in the past: Say, for example, that generally, when you sense certain situations could benefit from a caring attitude, you routinely respond in a caring way, perhaps uttering a kind word, giving a simple nod of support, maybe even tendering a gentle and loving reprimand. Your heart processes your caring attitude and responses into coherent rhythm patterns and these are sent to the brain, which in turn triggers remembered responses appropriate to or learned from previous similar situations.

When heart-rhythm patterns are incoherent – disordered and irregular – your heart sends these unfavorable patterns to the brain, which then searches its stored heartrhythm patterns in search of a match and simply triggers a remembered emotional response – what you might call learned behavior. Say, for example, that on occasions when things irritate or anger you, more often than not you respond by shouting or slamming a door, or with other negative reactions. What do you think the brain is likely to recommend as an emotional response the very next time something angers you?

The odds aren’t good for a positive response– even if it means your brain is contributing to the following vicious cycle: Anger leads to incoherence, which leads to a negative response, which leads to continued incoherence, etc.

FORGIVENESS - Are you willing to take the risk to forgive and to be loved unconditionally? Explore the power of forgiveness. Strive to release injuries & pain others have caused or what you may have inflicted upon yourself. This is a process and does not happen instantly. But if anger is all you ever have, healing cannot occur.

Forgiveness is a way of lifting resentments, more for you than anyone else a choice for you to seek higher ground, this cannot be forced. In this journey you will undertake to explore your humanness, will set you free and help you to understand the trials and endless lessons that the human experience offers TRANSFORMATION: This is about developing your psychic awareness. Improve your creativity, intuition, insight & clarity. This high level meditation is a journey of transformation using light energy. It works specifically through the body’s seven energy centers (chakras) to reactivate your psychic awareness and to connect with your higher self. This meditation also assists you Integrate your mental and emotional bodies, unites your left and right brain.

IN CONCLUSION When is the last time you set out to achieve an unattainable goal? True innovation happens outside of habit, far beyond the walls of any comfort zone. “The truth is, most of us discover where we are headed when we arrive,” Calvin and Hobbes creator Bill Watterson famously remarked during his commencement speech at Kenyon College.

In The Happiness of Pursuit: Finding the Quest That Will Bring Purpose to Your Life, entrepreneur and author Chris Guillebeau takes that point one step further, outlining a new definition of happiness: a state defined — not attained — by the act of striving.

Setting a goal you know you can achieve does nothing but document your own productivity. But when you set a goal you don’t know you can achieve, you catapult yourself into the terrifying, exhilarating act of pursuit.

Here are four things only pursuit can teach you: What you’re really, truly curious about. Curiosity is a chemical process in the brain that occurs when we feel “a gap between what we know and what we do not know,” according to neurobiologist George Lowenstein. This gap works like a mental itch that must be scratched, driving us to close it by learning. “The lesson is that our desire for abstract information – this is the cause of curiosity – begins as a dopaminergic craving, rooted in the same primal pathway that also responds to sex, drugs and rock and roll,” writes Jonah Lehrer for Wired.

What is your itch? What questions do you go back to, over and over again? Follow those questions — they will lead you to the story you want to (and, subsequently, need to) tell.

Where you have gotten too comfortable. “[A quest] takes your patterns and your routines and kind of forces you to flip them and it can be uncomfortable,” Chris says. A daily routine can easily become a routine of comfort. By removing yourself from your usual patterns, you can quickly identify the habits and rituals that are holding you back.

How you want to be remarkable. A quest is an ambitious undertaking, one that illuminates the values you hold most dear. For Chris, his quest to see every country in the world was driven by his love of adventure, but even beyond that, how he wanted to prove to himself that he could be a person who had visited every country in the world.

In his now-infamous essay “How to Do What You Love,” Paul Graham writes, “To be happy I think you have to be doing something you not only enjoy, but admire.”

For Matt Krause, whose quest to walk across all of Turkey is featured in The Happiness of Pursuit, his motivation came from asking himself: “In ten years, what will make you prouder of yourself… having bought a flashy car, or having done something big and amazing?” On a whim, he chose Turkey. The productive force here is internal admiration; the legacy you want to create, not the life you want to live in comparison.

Says writer Christy Campbell: “The minute I start comparing my trip, my day, my current situation with someone else’s, I’m missing out on how great my own story is, simply because it’s mine.”

What you fear. “Embracing new things often requires us to embrace our fears, however trivial they may seem,” writes Chris. And his point isn’t to extinguish your fears — but to acknowledge them and prevent them from limiting your choices. What are you most afraid of happening to you? Is that fear worth not telling your story?

Fear of the unknown is a powerful motivator on its own. What are you afraid of regretting if you never get around to starting? “Life is too short to settle,” Chris says. “If you want to achieve the unimaginable, start with imagining it.”

“I cannot teach anybody anything, I can only make them think.” – Socrates I cannot teach you, only help you to explore yourself. Nothing more. – Bruce Lee The following poem reminded me of one of my favorite Bruce Lee quotes. Here is the poem that was shared with me from a student.

It’s up to you!

– Unknown I gave you life, but I cannot live it for you.

I can teach you things, but I cannot make you learn.

I can give you directions, but I cannot always be there to lead you.

I can allow you freedom, but I cannot account for it.

I can take you to temples but I cannot make you believe.

I can teach you right from wrong, but I cannot decide for you I can give you love, but I cannot force it upon you.

I can teach you to be a friend, but I cannot make you unselfish.

I can teach you respect, but I cannot force you to show honor.

I can grieve about your report card, but I cannot make you study.

I can advise you about friends, but I cannot choose them for you.

I can teach you about sex and the facts of life, but I cannot decide for you.

I can tell you about drinking, but I cannot say ‘no’ for you.

I can teach you about goals and dreams, but I cannot achieve them for you.

I can warn you about sin, but I cannot make your morals.

I can love you as a daughter, but I cannot place you in God’s family I can pray for you and your future, but I cannot make you do the same.

I can tell you how to live, but I cannot give you eternal life.

How to Interview a Psychic

By Alex Palermo Owner of The Tremont Tea Room Psychic Salon, Boston, Massachusetts How can you determine if a Reader is "right" for you?

In a large metropolitan area, we are fortunate to be able to pick from a large variety of professional readers. But how can we know in advance who will give the best reading?

How can we avoid incompetence or downright fraud? There are no guarantees in this life, but there are simple guidelines for this process - and you don't have to be psychic to use them!

Know what you want. First, discard the idea that because you are not expert in psychic matters that you cannot come to a good, informed decision. Whether it's picking a reader or a pair of socks, certain basic rules apply. Know your bottom line; the more concisely you know what information you want, the more readily you can interview readers to see if their focus and style suit your needs. It would be an over-simplification to say that one type of reading (say, astrology or tarot) fits a certain need better than another. Often, any kind of reading can address any life question. It is the reader's psychic skill, and his or her ability with divination tools, that brings the answers.

Interview the reader. Next, just as in hiring any kind of consultant, it is important to interview readers to determine their qualifications. Ask the kind of questions you would ask in any type of business dealing. How did you become a reader? How long have you been doing readings? What is your philosophy about what you do? What kind of information can I expect to get from a reading with you? What is a typical reading like?

Ask the readers if they will be taping the reading for you. If the reader does not provide a tape of the session, then advise him or her that you will be bringing your own tape and recorder. No one can possibly remember everything that is said in a reading. A recording is important for you to refer to and for you to receive full benefit from the reading. A reader must be responsible for what he or she says. Another warning sign of incompetence or fraud is a reader who will not allow a recording of their words.

Ask yourself what kind of feeling you get about this reader. Do you feel comfortable talking to him or her? Do the answers given strike a responsive chord and feel right to you? What is your impression of their level of competence? Are your questions answered to your satisfaction? Are the explanations full or are they abrupt and peremptory? In answering these kinds of questions for yourself, not only will you be evaluating the reader objectively, you will be using your intuition as well. If you feel clearly positive about your impressions, then you are quite likely to have a good working rapport.

If you'd like to learn more about how to develop your own intuition, check out The Seeker's Circle Intuition Development page, full of free articles, exercises, and interviews with intuition development authors and teachers.

Read Alex's article, Psychic Code of Ethics.

Copyright (c) 1995 by Alex Palermo. All rights reserved.

Why Do We Avoid Certain Topics?

By Karyn Greenstreet, Life and Business Coach copyright Š 2000, by Karyn Greenstreet. All rights reserved.

I have noticed among my students a general discomfort with answering certain types of questions that the READER, themselves, are struggling with or have struggled with in the past. I'm not saying that this is the case with you, but it's something to consider.

For example, I had a Reader who felt uncomfortable giving any information about infidelity in spouses. She felt she was too biased towards saying "infidelity is always wrong." When she began to examine her situation, she realized that infidelity had hurt her sister very, very deeply, and any discussion of it brought back the anger and pain.

Since she couldn't disconnect her own personal feelings about a topic from allowing any intuitive information to come through, she felt blocked and uncomfortable, and avoided the topic.

I recommend to people that they take a good look at WHY a particular topic might be uncomfortable for them. Are they willing to talk about this same topic with family and friends, or do they always seem to avoid the topic in their life? I have found that the more you really need to look at a topic, the more often it will come up in readings, as if the Universe is saying, "YOU can learn from the readings you give to others, too!" (I always seem to find the topic of weight loss comes up in my readings for others...gee...don't know why!)

People are often uncomfortable talking about romance, as it's a very emotional topic.

But so is someone's "career" if they're unemployed, and so is someone's "family" if a family member is ill. We can not separate people's emotional life from other parts of their life, because it's all intertwined. As you practice your intuition you will find that "feelings" are just as important as "facts," and that you will grow as a person yourself as you learn to read for others.

Psychic Reading vs. Psychological Advice-Giving

By Karyn Greenstreet, Life and Business Coach copyright © 2000, by Karyn Greenstreet. All rights reserved.

Over the years, I have found that readings are a combination of pure intuition, psychological reflection of the Querent's feelings on the subject, listening skills, and compassionate dialogue. When people come to us for a "reading," sometimes all they really want is someone to listen to them and assure them that they are capable of making the right decision on their own. In any reading, even a purely intuitive one, you are often telling a person about their own personality traits and psychological make-up, as a way of offering insight into their situation. Therefore, there is always a very blurred line between “psychic” and “psychology,” and I believe you cannot truly separate the two.

It is true that a reading should contain more intuitive insight than motherly advice. It is not intended to be a "Dear Abby" column, and Readers should refrain from offering personal advice if that advice is not intuitively-derived. We all have our personal opinions based on beliefs and experiences we've had and we should refrain from giving advice based on our opinions. Instead, we should look at the situation as neutrally as possible, intuitively deduce the likely paths and outcomes, and advise the Querent of those paths and outcomes. We should not tell the Querent what to do; instead, we show them the insights we have received, and empower them to make their own decision.

Let me give you an example which may illustrate the difference: A young woman asks for a reading, indicating that she's doing terribly in college, and that she's afraid to tell her parents. She wonders if college was the right choice or perhaps she should have gotten a job right out of high school.

Here are two "readings," one that is really a reading, one that is really an advice column: READING: “I sense that you are not getting good grades because you fear what comes after college. I sense that your fear is that if you get good grades, you will have to repeat this high performance in the work world. When I look into your past behavior patterns, I see a scene where this has fear has stopped you from truly expressing your intellectual gifts. Take time to look at your pattern for self-sabotage and self-confidence issues. In addition, I sense that you are having difficulty understanding the strong foreign accent of your Economics teacher, but are afraid of bringing this to the attention of the school for fear of being labeled ‘racist’. You are not the only person who is having difficulty understanding this knowledgeable professor.”

ADVICE/PSYCHOLOGICAL REFLECTION: “I can understand how you would be concerned. The decision to go to college versus working is always a hard one.

However, you are in college now and you need to handle the situation you are in before you move forward with what you want to do with your life. You should tell your parents the truth about your college grades and you should determine why you aren’t getting good grades.”

In the Reading, the discussion is about the Querent’s fear. It does not tell the Querent what to DO. In the second example, the discussion focuses on reflecting back what the Querent said, and gives advice about how the Querent “should” think and act.

As a favorite teacher of mine (Torah) reminds us, "Your intuition is pure. It isn't conditioned by some other hidden agenda you would have in your psychology."

Intuition can help us get more in touch with our authentic self, as well as guide us in the best direction. Intuition can be developed gradually through some basic exercises, as follows: To begin, always start with centering yourself: relaxed breathing, grounding, with a request to open to information for the highest good of all. As you get better using your intuition, the routine will kick in more automatically.

1. Each day pay attention to your subtle, inner voice and your body reactions that have an immediate response to a situation or a person. This voice or body reaction may caution you about something, offer advice, tell you something about a person or situation you wouldn't otherwise know. It could be about taking a certain route, parking in a particular space, avoiding something or someone, or receiving insight in how to communicate with someone. Often we ignore these little feelings, but I am asking you now to note them and to make note of them, in writing. Observe yourself. See what your feelings, body, intuition are telling you and where you feel it in your body.

2. Secondly, note how your intellect interacted with, and responded to, your intuition: did you tell it to be quiet, or make fun of it, disbelieve it, shove it aside and replace what you think makes more "sense?"

3. Did you follow your gut instinct, your intuition, in spite of what would more commonly make sense? How did it turn out? Was your intuition more accurate or less accurate? If less accurate, examine potential reasons for being less accurate. Was something else influencing your thoughts? Doubt?

4. Make written brief notes about your intuitions and the outcome of either following them, or not following them. What does this say about you?

5. Practice safely blocking off one of your senses, such as sight or sound, and use your other senses to see what you can pick up in terms of an object, energies, colors, information, emotions. Put your hands close to a plant and its leaves and see if you can feel its energy. Can you tell if a glass is becoming full while pouring a liquid into it if your eyes are closed?

6. Practice new ways of doing everyday things. Change hands for a task. Reverse the order of something. If you put on your right shoe first, switch it to your left shoe first.

Alternate your daily routine. Getting out of the habit of doing everything exactly the same way will open up your intuitive abilities because it breaks you out of a rut, expands your experiences, and lets you feel life in a new way. Note how your body responds to a change in your routines.

7. Give yourself a little test. See if you can guess what someone will say before they say it, or if you know the outcome of a game show when it's half-way through, for instance.

9. Pay attention to how your body tells you that you are right on target. There is a definite difference between true "knowing� and "guessing." Not knowing something for certain leaves you with a feeling of emptiness or jitteriness, you don't feel solid or centered. When you really know the information you receive is accurate, you feel confident and strong.

9. Just because you may have insight into things that does not make you solely responsible for anyone other than yourself, or the outcome of a situation. Nor does it give you permission to manipulate others or abuse your intuitive abilities. (Just remember what goes around, does come around.) You have to also realize that what you receive might contain symbolism - so you have to figure out how to decipher the symbols for yourself. When you are focusing on what is for the highest good for yourself and others, your Higher Self, your intuition, will tell you the best course of action to take.

Life is too short to wake up with regrets. So love the people who treat you right. Love the ones who don't just because you can. Believe everything happens for a reason. If you get a second chance, grab it with both hands. If it changes your life, let it. Kiss slowly. Forgive quickly. God never said life would be easy. He just promised it would be worth it. ===== CLASS DESCRIPTION Everett Hog is a Life and Business Coach. He helps self-employed people create and grow their business, stay focused and motivated, and create a balanced life. Visit Karyn's website at Passion for Business, small business coaching and consulting for the self employed.

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The Adventure Of Transformation Life-changing learning is essential to your wellbeing. For me and you and millions like us, the journey of transformation is one of our life’s main priorities. These days, though, you probably don’t have as many hours to spend going to seminars and reading inspiring books. In the pressure of daily life it can be a challenge to keep your mind and heart opening to new possibilities. Your time is precious, and even though you learn best through up-close experiential seminars, you’re probably tired of the travel hassles and high cost of places like Esalen and Omega.

A New Vision Of Possibility Several years ago I had a vision of a new kind of learning community. I visualized people all over the world passionately engaged in breakthrough learning about the most important things in life-relationships, personal change, manifestation, conscious business. Connected by the power of the web, they were learning at their own pace, in their own homes, free of distractions like grades and term papers. I felt a warm glow in my heart as I saw people transforming their lives in new ways. Now, thanks to the work of many dedicated colleagues, the vision has come true. It’s my great pleasure to welcome you to a new adventure in transformation.

New Choices Gaia Illumination University brings positive new choices and options into your life. Now, you can relax with a cup of tea in the evening, pick up the phone and join a conversation with Marianne Williamson, Deepak Chopra, James Ray and other leadingedge teachers you admire. Now, you can get immediate information on relationship issues that concern you, either in one of our eCourses or in a phone-conference with the top relationship experts of today. Now, you can get the latest tools of manifestation from master-teachers such as Jack Canfield, Bill Harris and other teachers from The Secret.

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Please join the community and invite all your friends. All of us who love transformational learning need a place to call our own. Now, there’s a congenial home for those of us who love leading-edge learning about what matters most.

It’s all based on an extensive study of the thinking, decisions and actions of people who have achieved abundance and wealth--often people who started with nothing or almost nothing.

Developing intuition Many of the most difficult problems have been and are not susceptible to a primarily intellectual approach. Intuition aids us in dealing with these problems as a sort of poor relation to intellect. We recognize the need for inspiration and creativity, but treat these as magical gifts and not as a talent that can be developed or neglected.

The creative arts are further along at developing intuitive talent than academia and the worlds of science and technology. Intuition is at the core of the creative arts, but it is equally central to any creative endeavor. In the creative arts, intuition is often holds center stage. There are disciplined approaches to developing and extending it.

Method Acting is one example.

How do we recognize and develop intuitive talent? When I entered the University of Illinois at Urbana as a freshman I took a test for the Math Honors Program. The test consisted of three problems one of which one needed to solve to pass the test. A straightforward solution to the problems required a course in mathematics one level beyond what one had taken in high school. I only got as far as analytic geometry at my small Catholic high school and so a straight forward solution to the problems required a knowledge of calculus. Of course you did not need to reinvent the calculus, but you did need to invent some aspect of the ideas that led to the creation of the calculus. A thorough understanding of the mathematics one had studied was not enough to pass the test. One had to come up with a creative approach to the problem.

This is one approach to testing for intuitive talent. Can one extend what one has learned to solve problems that do not have a straightforward solution? When I taught a course in logical design at UCLA I included a question that most students missed even though it was a `who is buried in Grant's tomb?' type of question. One can construct logical circuits like those described in Section 5.3 with multiple levels of logic. The outputs of lower levels are inputs to higher levels as shown in Table 5.2. If one has a truth table for such a circuit one can construct the minimal two level solution, i. e. the one that has the fewest logical operators: AND/OR. The problem started with the diagram of a logical circuit. There were three parts to the problem. First construct the truth table for the circuit. Second construct the minimal two level circuit that implements the truth table. Third note that the circuit you constructed has more logical elements than the original circuit. Explain how it can be the minimal two level solution. The answer was that the original circuit had three levels.

Why did so many students miss this obvious answer? I think it is because they are not taught to make connections. They are taught to apply methods. If you are exploring possible connections than the phrase `minimal two level circuit' suggests that a three level circuit gives you more options to try and might be better than a two level solution.

Intuition is always making connections and seeing possibilities. Invariably most of these connections and possibilities are meaningless, nonsense or false. But that is how intuition must work. If it is constrained by what makes sense logically than it cannot do its job.

Intellect and other functions are needed to evaluate the work of intuition, but they must not limit the scope of its functioning. Often that is precisely what we are taught in formal education.

After all intuition can be extremely distracting. Instead of focusing minds on the material at hand it leads off in all directions. We need the discipline of focus, but we equally need the discipline of intuitive rambling. We need to give space for and encouragement to both. Formal education almost universally discourages intuitive wandering. No doubt one of the effects of Ritalin widely prescribed to children for `Attention Deficit Disorder' is to weaken intuition.

Well-Being Well-Being is achieved by taking responsibility for our own health. It is our own body which heals us, not any outside influence. Together we shall identify and clear the obstructions barring your path to well-being.

Well-Being is reduced when our vitality - our unique predisposition to good health - is eroded by obstructions. These obstructions can include: • over eating • over drinking • over thinking • lack of exercise • being under too much stress • doing too much • not getting enough sleep/rest • lack of peace and calm in mind • eating processed foods.

Health starts in the mind. We are used to listening to all the thoughts our mind throws at us but not used to listening to our bodies. We all have the answers to our healing if we listen to our bodies and act on the messages it sends us.

There are three components to developing intuition. First is providing the personal material in terms of learning and life experience that intuition uses. Next is exercising the intuitive muscle by using intuition. This should involve both random rambling and focused problem solving. The problems must always be ones for which one knows no canned intellectual approach. It is a challenge to create such problems. One cannot give a standardized test for intuition because one can always educate for the test.

Finally there is the need to develop the archetypal images that intuition relies on. The best of Fairy Tales is one way to do this for small children.

Astrology, the I Ching and Tarot are examples of ancient methods of developing intuition. They focus on archetypal images. They describe the seeds of transformation that exist in a current state. They are immersed in superstition. No attempt has been

made to integrate them with scientific understanding or to create similar new forms that are compatible with contemporary science. This is particularly difficult because archetypal material have a numinous chthonic aspect.

How can we develop intuition, let it lead the way and yet hold it back from leaping into the abyss. For intuition to become more universal it must become more developed and differentiated. We must know when and how to use it and we must know with some, albeit imperfect, reliability when it leads us too far afield from what is practically possible.

The one sided culture I am so critical of has provided one important tool for this. The computer allows us to create artificial universes to play with ideas and refine our intuition. I can learn complex technical material best if I can program it and play with the program. A mass of equations without the opportunity to make them alive in a computer is virtually meaningless to me. It is not that I am unable to understand them, but the mode that I can understand them has to involve an element of playfulness and has to be tolerant of many silly errors which I continuously make. Although a computer is completely intolerant of mistakes, it allows as many tries as you are willing to make to get it right.

Intuition is not as quick as intellect but it is deeper. Intellect can easily grasp things as a series of complex operations. This is impossible for intuition. Intuition must know how the operations relate to each other and to a host of similar operations that are already understood. This takes time and it takes playing with ideas. For complex systems this is impossible without a computer to handle the details. Of course there is no intuitive only or intellectual only learning. All learning involves sequences of steps, playing with ideas and relating new ideas to old ones. The difference is one of emphasis.

The computer combined with communication technology is a powerful aid to intuition in another way. It can create learning and dialog networks of people concerned about a particular issue. The misnamed newsgroups on Internet serve this purpose. Although they do contain some news the vast majority of traffic involves networks of people exchanging ideas and learning from each other material that is far from new. For me this was an effective way to learn the language and some of the technical content of quantum mechanics. It helped me to extend my ideas and put them in a context that others could more easily understand.

Technology can change the value of human talents. Gauss had an advantage over his colleagues in being a skilled calculator. That was an important asset for a mathematician in his time, but is of little use today. No matter how good a calculator you are you can buy a better one for a few dollars.

Computer technology allows us to automate many of the simpler intellectual skills such as calculation. Inevitably this lowers the value of those skills while opening new possibilities to those with different skills. We are just beginning to understand what can be done and still view this opportunity too narrowly. We want to automate mathematical proofs so we try to create completely automated theorem provers. We want to automate chess so we make a computer program that can beat a grand master. Technology is far from being able to replace the human mind. The enormous calculating power of modern computers is sufficient to defeat the best of human chess players with the brute force methods that such chess programs use. That is not the way to make the best chess player. To do that combines the special skills of the computer with the subtle skills of the human. Let the human use a computer program to aid play

just as you let a student use a calculator during a physics exam. The best computer aided chess player will almost certainly not be the same person as the best unaided chess player.

Finding the worlds best computer aided chess player may not be important to cultural development, but effectively using the computer to amplify human mental skills is. This is starting to happen with intuitive graphical user interfaces, programs to do mathematical analysis as well as computation and tools for scientific visualization.

However we must recognize how primitive our understanding is. People with powerful intuition that have played a major role in science like Einstein and Jung are usually in Jung's terminology thinking types. Their greatest strength is their powerful intuition, but it is only through the dominance of intellect that they are able to digest the fruits of that intuition to a form that can be appreciated by our intellectually dominated culture. To get beyond this stage is no small task. We have regressed in the institutional structures to develop intuition since the middle ages. It is not possible for anyone to say what a world with intuition and intellect in more equal roles would be like other than it will be markedly different and far richer than the world we know.

... so this is for us.

This is for us who sing, write, dance, act, study, run and love and this is for doing it even if no one will ever know because the beauty is in the act of doing it.

Not what it can lead to.

This is for the times I lose myself while writing, singing, playing and no one is around and they will never know but I will forever remember and that shines brighter than any praise or fame or glory I will ever have, and this is for you who write or play or read or sing by yourself with the light off and door closed when the world is asleep and the stars are aligned and maybe no one will ever hear it or read your words or know your thoughts but it doesn’t make it less glorious.

It makes it ethereal. Mysterious.

Infinite.

For it belongs to you and whatever God or spirit you believe in and only you can decide how much it meant and means and will forever mean and other people will experience it too through you.

Through your spirit. Through the way you talk.

Through the way you walk and love and laugh and care and I never meant to write this long but what I want to say is: Don’t try to present your art by making other people read or hear or see or touch it; make them feel it. Wear your art like your heart on your sleeve and keep it alive by making people feel a little better. Feel a little lighter. Create art in order for yourself to

become yourself and let your very existence be your song, your poem, your story.

Let your very identity be your book.

Let the way people say your name sound like the sweetest melody.

So go create. Take photographs in the wood, run alone in the rain and sing your heart out high up on a mountain where no one will ever hear and your very existence will be the most hypnotizing scar.

Make your life be your art and you will never be forgotten.” ― Charlotte Eriksson

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Publications 1929-1936, volume 1 of Kurt Gรถdel Collected Works.

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Professional Intuitives We recommend the following professional Intuitives, because we have known them and used their services for many years; they are consistently excellent. They have either taught classes via The Seeker's Circle or contributed articles or chats. Click on the link to send an email: Nancy Marie, Intuitive (California) - (530) 926-0365 Wayne Morales, Astrologer (Georgia) - (770) 350-6650 Winter Robinson, Medical Intuitive (Maine) - (207) 929-6960 Lynn A. Robinson, Personal and Business Intuitive (Massachusetts) - (800) 925-4002 Lauren Thibodeau, Ph.D., Psychic Medium (New Jersey/New York) - (609) 430-9300 Tremont Tea Room Psychic Salon, Intuitives, Astrologers, Tarot Readers (Massachusetts) - (617) 338-8100

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How To Reawaken Your Natural Psychic Ability — And Always Know What to Do — Without Having to Learn Anything New With The 9 Free Lessons In Reawakening Your Psychic Ability, You Will Discover How to Tune In To A Power That Gives You Complete Control of Everything In Your Life

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The Answer To Life Management Is Not External — It’s Internal Most people live their lives with just five senses.

While the sweet taste of a strawberry is pleasurable, you have a sense more beneficial than every one of your five senses…

Combined.

When you reconnect to this most powerful sense, you can tune into a universally shared understanding of the world. By becoming closer to your most developed and authentic representation of life, you can…

Experience an easygoing flow with any situation Never feel overwhelmed. Make the burden of a hectic job a dated memory. End a life of commotion, external demand, and stress. Guide yourself to better moments — from the small things that matter such as getting a better parking spot, to connecting with a business partner who helps you multiply your yearly income.

Enjoy deeper connections and heartwarming relationships Strengthen your once quiet voice to one of great power. Fully connect with the people around you. Grow your levels of empathy far greater than what you thought possible.

Have unimaginable levels of confidence — attract others in your personal life, and take leadership positions at work with ease.

Open a free-flowing source of inspiration and creativity Navigate through any obstacle on your path. Tune in with your psychic ability, so you can manifest the ability to pick the right answer — no matter what. Generate more moneymaking ideas — there is no easier way to start a business than to understand the universal inner voice that guides all things in your life.

Instantly make better decisions Meet people for the first time, and know in a heartbeat if he or she is trustworthy. Easily sense when someone is lying to you. Know — beyond a shadow of a doubt — how to respond in any social setting. Imagine how much less of a burden it will be when you can know right away what personal and professional relationships are best for you.

Attract more money, as if you were “magnetized” to it Quiet the noise and figure out ways to make an additional $1000 a month, without spending more time and resources. Attract the money you need — it may seem

strange, but it’s been proven that people who tune in to their intuition make more money.

Live an authentic life full with purpose Become ten times stronger than you were yesterday, and repeat this process forever.

Listen to your highest and most authentic self, so you can live a heartfelt life. Help others grow and become better individuals — when you tune in, you can create any change in those around you.

There is an ebb and flow to life. No matter the point in history, human beings have acted and reacted in similar fashions. A deep, psychological process determines and controls behavior.

When you awaken your personal psychic ability, you can reconnect with life itself. You will learn to live within flow of life and learn how to navigate the ebb. You will become a powerful, influential, and successful person, because you are tuning into a connected source of thought.

An Intuitive Force That Guided Life’s Greatest Thinkers, Artists, and Business Owners

Your initial skepticism is normal.

You are in “fight, flight, or freeze” frame of mind. Your brain is highly active — as most minds are.

Right now, you are still not sure whether to flee from this page or challenge the benefits offered to you.

The world today is full of noise – and news, conflicts, and stress distort your sixth sense.

External pressures create “static” in the air, overloading the “frequency” of your intuition… causing you to make hasty decisions with your head based on what you think is logical, instead of significant decisions with your intuition that you feel are right.

If you are still skeptical, it is because your mind is fully active right now. The “world” has us believe being headstrong is a good thing. Yet, people who think with their heads do not always make the best decisions. In fact, the conscious mind is only 10% of your potential.

To fully understand the situation you’re in right now, and make the best decision for you, put your mind at rest for a moment… …and try to listen to your sixth sense — the deep internal voice uninfluenced by external stimuli, as you consider the following: The greatest decision makers and life achievers throughout time were not necessarily “book smart.” They just knew how to listen to that inner self. They know how to tune in.

They knew how to connect with their innate psychic power.

People like…

Albert Einstein, who famously said, “ The only real valuable thing is intuition ”, and came up with his Theory of Relativity via an intuitive dream. He also called your sixth sense a “sacred gift.”

Movie Star Kim Basinger, who said, “I feel there are two people inside me — me and my intuition. If I go against her, she’ll screw me every time… and if I follow her, we get along quite nicely! ” English billionaire Sir Richard Branson, who tells stories in his books about following his intuition. He says, “I rely far more on gut instinct than researching huge amounts of statistics… We all have an intuitive sense of what’s best — follow it! ” History’s most influential people were not any different from you, aside from one major thing: they knew how to tap into their intuition. They knew how to connect with the inner voice. The same voice that you have inside of you right now, waiting for you to answer its calling.

The Ultimate Intuitive Power You Were Born With

You might have called it déjà vu or a gut feeling.

You recognize it when it happens as an inner voice, only audible to you — and when it speaks, you know you feel completely empowered, connected, and fully relaxed — no matter your surroundings or your environment.

You felt this way when you were a kid, and you were in full discovery mode. You were consistently curious about new things, as most children are. You asked questions to the point where adults laughed at you — but you did not care! You just wanted to know why things were the way they were! You wanted reasons and answers — and above all else, you yearned for knowledge.

You used to rely on your inner voice to guide you to seek out new things and help you make decisions… …but then, over time, the ability of yours to listen to your intuition faded. The world “silenced” your psychic ability, because it told you to think with your head. People would tell you…

“Go to school.”

“Get a degree.”

“Be headstrong, and everything will be okay.”

Above all else, you start you started to believe… …the knowledge you were seeking — the information other people told you — was more important than thereason why you were seeking it in the first place.

If the above statement resonates with you, your intuition is calling out to you at this very moment. Your innate connection to life wants you to reconnect — because it knows what is best for you. Your intuition is the ultimate source all things in existence. An allpowerful voice that wants to guide your questions, thoughts, and decisions is waiting.

Your psychic ability started growing when you were no bigger than a pinky nail.

It still exists right now.

It’s always with you.

All you have to connect to your natural ability to listen and understand the world —the deep inner voice you born with — is learn how to reconnect with it.

You can begin to learn what it takes tune in to your intuition with the 9 free lessons in Reawakening Your Psychic Ability. The lessons are things anyone can do. It’s not difficult at all.

Actually, it’s a lot of fun.

Reconnect with Your Psychic Ability with the Help of the World’s Leading Expert in Intuition, Sonia Choquette Meet Sonia Choquette. Over the years, she’s had the privilege of becoming known as the world’s foremost expert on the subject of human intuition.

She’s written 19 bestselling books on intuitive awakening, personal and creative growth, and transformational leadership — including the New York Times bestseller The Answer Is

Simple. Her books span the glove, read in more than 40 countries and written in at least 37 languages.

Sonia’s philanthropic work has brought her to workshops in South Africa, through her publisher Hay House, she’s set up organizational collaborations with Nurturing Orphans withAIDS for Humanity (NOAH), in addition to charity work and fundraising throughout the United States.

Mainstream media publications have noticed Sonia’s work. Her featured appearances include CNN, ABC, NBC, Inc.,USA TODAY, Los Angeles Times, and The London Times.

“Sonia is a thoughtful, gentle intuit” “18 years ago Sonia changed the course of my life for the better and I can’t thank her enough. My girlfriend at the time had a job offer on the West Coast, and I was unsure whether to follow her since I had a good job in Chicago. When I went to see her the first thing Sonia said to me before I said a word was “are you thinking of moving? To LA?” I was stunned since I had told no one of my predicament. I told her “yes” and she said “ you should go… don’t wait…. Are you also interesting in acting because I see you being very successful at that? I was shocked because that was a dream that I had put on the back burners.

She went on to tell many, many things that came to pass about the move, my relationship, and even my parents. She foresaw how gravely ill my mother was before any of us knew. She didn’t say she was dying she simply said “spend more time with her.” The best advice a young son in denial could have gotten, and I am eternally grateful for that.

Sonia is a thoughtful, gentle intuit who not only provides guidance but also helps you to recognize your own psychic abilities.”

Karl W. Sherman Oaks, CA

“Live a fuller and more authentic life” “Sonia has been a positive influence in my life for many years. I have read all of her books and attended some of her workshops. I had one-on-one readings in her home office years ago that were spot on and life-changing. Sonia offers tools to help get in touch with our own intuitive self to live a fuller and more authentic life. She has been a blessing to my life.”

Tami T. Chicago, IL

“Live a fuller and more authentic life”

If anyone is the real deal it’s this woman. She won’t necessarily tell you what you want to hear, but she’ll definitely tell you what youNEED to hear. Some intuitives rely on pumping up their clients egos to get them coming back again and again. Not Sonia.

Her one motivation is inspiring people to take action to heal their own lives. This woman had a profound impact on my life from 2004 – 2008 and I’ll always have fond memories of her. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart Sonia, Thank you!

Ryan R. Los Angeles, CA

Nine Lessons…

Lesson 1 Using Memories to Make Better Decisions Looking internally leads to positive changes in your external personal and professional life. By the end of this lesson, you will understand how to tune in to your memory, and use it to make better decisions.

Lesson 2 How to Understand and Listen to Your Sixth Sense Reawakening requires listening. In this lesson, you’ll learn several ways to prepare your psychic and physical self to tune in. This foundational lesson sets the tone for future reconnections.

Lesson 3 Confirming Your Rediscovered Awareness and Manifesting Your Intuition into Reality Making this confirmation solidifies the beginning of your psychic ability, and shows you how one simple expression transfers internal dialogue to external action.

Lesson 4 Living and Breathing Within the Flow and Learning How to Call Your Intuition The breathing techniques in this lesson allow you to rid yourself of stress and anxiety, feel increased clarity, and reconnect with your personal psychic ability.

Lesson 5 How to Use Your Intuition to Be Fearless No Matter What Obstacle is in your Path

Fear is important because it keeps you from danger, but it also keeps you from opportunity. When combing the breathing exercises from the last lesson with facing fear, you will discover your own way to reconnecting with a powerful psychic energy.

Lesson 6 How to Turn Your Present “Failures� Into Future Successes In this lesson, you will learn a three-step method for turning the mistakes you made yesterday in to benefits for today and tomorrow.

Lesson 7 Entering Your Flow and Manifesting Beneficial Opportunities and Experiences In this lesson, you will learn what it means to live within your flow. Once you are in this increased intuitive state, you can use your internal guide to manifest positive outcomes and experiences in your day-to-day life.

Lesson 8

How to Leap from Your Comfort Zone and Grow Your Confidence In this lesson, you will start taking leaps from your comfort zone, so you can place yourself in an empowered intuitive state. As you develop your intuition, you will be more comfortable with distancing yourself from limiting patterns of thought that keep you from overcoming your challenges.

Lesson 9 How to Understand the Communication Style of Your Psychic Power In this final lesson, you will find out the various languages your intuition uses to reach you. This lesson combines several parts of previous lessons.

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