editorial

Communication is the key to success in any arena – in the home, in the workplace, in the mind. What do we really mean when we way “communication?” Usually what comes to mind is the way we speak – the words we choose to say, and how we choose to deliver them. But there is more to communication than the words we speak. Much, much more.

Communication starts in the mind. How do I communicate with myself? How do I perceive myself? How broad and deep is my capacity for unconditional love and compassion toward myself? Because within the self is where these traits are developed and nurtured. If they don’t exist inside myself, how likely are they to find real expression with anyone else in any real way? This is the inward, reflective dimension of communication.

On the flip-side, communication is also expressed in the actions I choose to take (or refrain from taking). When activities are performed without any thought, without dwelling upon or at least connecting to their significance, they are empty. Even the smallest act or refraining, matter how inconsequential or fleeting it might seem, is of immense significance – as if the entire universe pauses and holds its breath in anticipation of my choice, which impacts the course of its trajectory. This is the outward, projected dimension of communication.

Nestled somewhere between the inward communication of thought and the outward communication of action is the bridge between them – speech itself. Speech brings the nuances of thought into reality, and propels action. Words are powerful. They can do amazing things. That can also polarize, put up walls, and cause tremendous, irreversible pain. This usually happens when words are used to manipulate a situation, another person, or myself – or simply just to take up space when there should be thoughtful silence instead. We should learn to cherish the awkward silence.

Empty words, even if they provide temporary comfort, inspire confidence, peacemaking or lovemaking in the moment, are eventually exposed if they are devoid of thought and detached from action. Real communication is consistent through and through: Honest thought, thoughtful words and wordly actions synchronously chiming the same message, emanating from the heart.

It can be challenging to be present. Sometimes it takes hard work. I often find myself suddenly confronted with an important moment, surprised to find myself there. It’s like when I’m driving or wandering absentmindedly, on auto-pilot, and then abruptly “space in” to find myself in an unexpected place. It could be a difficult situation I didn’t see (or didn’t want to see) coming. Or it could be an opportunity to connect with a meaningful experience. Either way, I’m not prepared, not totally present, lost in the busy-ness of life or the meanderings of the mind.

Here is an exercise that provides a quick way out — or, more accurately, a way in:

Pause briefly to gather yourself and focus on the moment. The world can wait. It only takes a few seconds and three breaths. No one has to know.

Step one: Calm. Take a deep breath. Slow things down. You are here.

Step two: Clear. Take a deep breath. Remove all distraction. Nothing else matters right now other than this moment.

Step three: Connect. Think of one thing that makes this moment meaningful and special for you, especially right now.

Separating the need to become present, which can seem overwhelming, into three smaller steps, three deep breaths – calm, clear, connect – makes it more manageable. This is not a shortcut to attaining awareness, to unifying thought, speech and action. It is a tool to help get there, one moment at a time.

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editor Izzy Greenberg

editorial director Rabbi Levi Jacobson

senior rabbi & founder Rabbi Yoseph Y. Zaltzman

director Rabbi Mendel Zaltzman

manager Aryeh Rosenberg

jrcc board of governors Igor Korenzvit, Chair

advertising sales Rina Merovitch

advertising design Nina Berman

graphics & layout Tekiyah Creative

cover art Andrei Bordeianu

distribution JRCC, Origo Direct Marketing

© 2021 JRCC. Published monthly by the Jewish Russian Community Centre of Ontario.

Issue Number 220 (February 2021)

Mail Registration Number: 40062996 Circulation: 19,000

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