august 2015
Volume 8 Issue 1
one moment, please!
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4 COVER One Moment, Please! 8 Greg Louganis Surface Tension 14 Mele Apana
The Evolution of Mento Mele
16 Carlos chang And His Gay Agenda
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24 Hector Hoyos
As SisterFace
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one moment, please!
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By: mickey weems
Most of our lives consist of routine. Daily rituals, hassles, and pleasant surprises flow past us, much of it forgotten over time. But we all have that one event that changes everything, the one transformative moment that redefines how we swim through time as we approach our final days.
In truth, that “one moment� is actually different events, depending on which facet of ourselves we happen to be peering through. Is it a funny event, one that we tell friends when relaxing? Is it inspirational or commiserating, something we would say to a loved one in mourning? Or is it private, a deeply significant that we only discuss when we are alone in the presence of the universe?
This issue of eXpression! is about those life-changing events that happen in public for all the world to see. We asked four talented entertainers: a diver, a dancer, a radio host, and a drag personality, to tell us what was that one public moment that stopped the world, rearranged it, and set them upon a different course than what they had originally charted.
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...you are “ In describing what led up to that moment, other crucial moments come forth.
and go to sleep before being dragged back into a living nightmare.
For Olympic diver Greg Louganis, his world fell apart when he discovered his abusive lover had given him HIV. Radio personality Mele Apana had several moments of anguish and rage as she and her fiancé dealt with homophobia from relatives and people at the statehouse during the hearings for marriage equality. As a child, professional dancer Carlos Chang was denied his first love, competitive ice-skating, because his parents thought it looked too girly (and all that implied for him as he came to terms with his orientation). And when he was five years old, drag diva Hector Hoyos lived in terror, when his only escape was to hide under a huge holly bush
When drowning in disappointments and outright oppression, some people never make it to the surface. Or they learn to tread the waters of life quietly as not to attract sharks. For these four people featured this month, however, the hard times were instructive - each managed to swim through the troubled waters to calmer shores. Louganis went on to win Olympic medals after hitting his head on the diving board, all the while under a regimen of the crippling drug AZT. Apana stood with her beloved LGBT community during the SB1 hearings for marriage equality, publicly taking a stand when it might have been easier just to say nothing at all as not to
“This issue of eXpression!
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goes out to everyone who has struggled with the injustices of this world.”
not alone...” upset certain family members. When Chang, who is of Peruvian-Chinese ancestry, was criticized for not being European (as in white) enough to compete in Latin ballroom dance, he was having absolutely none of it - he already knew what it was like to be denied what he loved because of appearances. After everything he had experienced as a kid, Hoyos took the hurt of being fired for working while gay, and threw it like rainbow glitter all over Hawai‘i State legislators when he testified for the bill banning discrimination based on gender expression.
This issue of eXpression! goes out to everyone who has struggled with the injustice of this world and lost. All four interviewees know
how that feels. It is important that we all know we are not alone, and in that knowledge there is strength. Every great social movement begins with the downtrodden looking to each other in support rather than hiding in a corner, or even worse, learning to hate whatever group the oppressors came from.
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us keep that same sentiment in every encounter we have.
This is where we in Hawai‘i can learn from the example of the protectors of Mauna Kea who are against building the Thirty-Meter Telescope. We do not have to agree with them to admire the movement’s ethos of kapu aloha, showing love to the opposition rather than spitting venom, yet not backing down on what we consider to be right. The LGBT community did just that during the marriage equality hearings - let
Louganis won the hearts of sports fans around the world. Apana refused to go ballistic, and instead sends out aloha when once she would have given harsh lickins. Chang danced around his critics, and the high scores he received shut them down. Hoyos no longer hid himself - his alter-ego SisterFace stepped out from the club scene and into community activism, and she is larger than life so that others may take shelter beside her. The greatest tragedy of suffering is when it isolates us from each other. The redemption of suffering is its potential to unite us, sometimes even with those who disagree with us.
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Each of us have momentous moments in our lives. Not all of us, however, have one of them captured live and broadcast around the world. During the diving competition in the 1988 Olympics in Seoul, South Korea. Greg Louganis was performing a springboard dive during the preliminaries, and his head clipped the board on the way down. After receiving medical care, he got back up on the board and completed his dive, earning the highest score of any competitor for two consecutive days. I asked him about that moment when he hit the board, then went back and dove again, and then won the competition the next day: “Do you have ice water in your veins or what?” His response was not what I expected. “Once I went crashing into the water, I was embarrassed because this was the Olympic Games,” he said, “and really good divers don’t hit their heads on the board. I also knew what it must have looked like. They interviewed me right after and all I could do was apologize.” Let this sink in for a second. Louganis had suffered a mild concussion - I’ve watched the video of that dive several times, and even now, I wince when his head hits the tip of the board. I assumed the biggest issue for him was fear of having to do the dive again. I was wrong: His problem was not overcoming the trauma of a head injury, but rather living down the shame of a poor performance. I realized that I knew even less about Greg Louganis than I thought. After speaking with him at length, his reaction made sense. But I had to understand his life up to that point: a saga of loneliness, fear, brutality, cold indifference, betrayal, and the burning need to excel, all put on hold and held in check 8 | aug us t 2 0 1 5 - E X P R ESSION808.C OM
when he stepped up and hurled himself into the air.
Choreography of a Dive
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“I’ve always played ‘Believe in Yourself’ from “The Wiz” in my head when I got ready to dive,” he told me. Every dive was a routine, carefully planned out and executed at least a hundred times, his theme song in the background of his mind, practiced over and over again that his body knew exactly what to do. Greg Louganis was dancing in front of an audience long before he had ever mounted a diving board. He had been choreographing his moves in a competitive environment since he was three - he was dancing at a year and a half. That aspect of his life gave him needed relief from a world in which he did not fit in. Louganis was adopted into a Greek American family, but his Samoan ancestry made him appear noticeably darker than his parents. It was also a source of ridicule at school, where he was called “Sissy, nigger, retard” (he suffered from undiagnosed dyslexia) by some of his macho, melanin-chal-
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surface tension By: mickey weems | Photos: released
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lenged male classmates. Competitive dancing in sequined costumes did not help - every victory he received brought the real prospect of getting attacked on the way to school. Nevertheless, dancing allowed him to live in a world where, at least for the moment, he was a star rather than a target. “I went to a class reunion and met some of the guys who used to beat me up,” he recalled. “They remembered me for my success in dancing, how they admired me back then.” In the perverse social rules of American high schools, a loner such as himself was not supposed to outshine the jocks, whose reaction was to punish him for stealing their thunder. At one point he considered suicide. His father was also not too keen on his dancing. When young Greg realized his potential in diving, the sport became his refuge just as dancing had been in his younger years, but with butch credentials. Nevertheless, his father seemed to only care about him when he was competing, which made his drive to be the best even greater so that his dad would show him more respect, perhaps even affection. So, performing before an audience since the age of three, then diving into the hearts of sports lovers in America and the world, conditioned him to ignore the multiple injuries he received on his way to the Seoul Olympics. “When I went through the Nationals, I broke my thumb but I did not know it until after I won the competition. You either do it or you give in and give up.” Besides, hitting his head that day on the springboard was not the worst injury he had ever suffered. Prior to that, he had a full-on concussion after cracking his 10 | a ug us t 2 0 1 5 - E X P R ESSION808.C OM
skull on the diving platform, knocking him unconscious and in real danger of permanent disability. The clip he’d received on the springboard was nowhere as bad as that earlier injury. It also explains his embarrassment. A good performer doesn’t mess up the routine,
be it resplendent in a sequined outfit or near-naked in a Speedo. “My sense of self-worth was tied up in diving,” he said. He didn’t want to come up to the surface of the water, that was how bad he felt. The injury was nothing. “There was an anger bub-
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bling up in myself,” he recounted. Anger dominated his embarrassment and became a source of power.
Red Scare Louganis needed all the power he could get. Injury and embarrassment were nothing compared to a couple of other demons running around in his head. Diving was his refuge, his safe space in a world that, just before the Seoul Olympics, was falling apart. He had found out just a few months before that his abusive lover was also cheating on him. Not only that, his lover had given him HIV. Louganis’ doctor put him on a regimen of AZT, a drug that was toxic to many of those taking it. AZT was like a mild concussion: No big deal. What was a big deal was the fact that he was in the pool with a bleeding wound, and others would dive into that same pool. His coach knew his HIV status but said nothing. It was all up to him to determine what to do and what to say. “The pool has thousands of gallons of water, and chlorine kills HIV,” Louganis said. But he didn’t tell the physician who treated him about his status, and that same doctor treated his wound without protective gloves. Imagine the situation: Louganis had five minutes to decide whether to continue. He had been preparing for this event all his life. If he revealed his status, the resulting massive freakout would have been epic, and not in a good way. At the very least, it would have delayed the competition as the pool was drained, scrubbed, and then refilled. And he would have to kiss his beloved sport goodbye. The more important preliminary dive was the next one. As with just about every performance he’d ever done, he blocked out the demons and made his way to the diving board. The crowd was silent and anxious after watching his last disastrous dive. Sensing their concern, Louganis showed that he shared it by patting his hand over his heart. The crowd laughed, breaking the tension for him, for them, for everyone watching across the globe. Louganis EX PR ESSION 808.COM - a u gu s t 2015 | 11
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played “Believe in Yourself” in his head, measured out his steps, and made his dive. It was his highest score, and the highest score of all the competitors that day and the day after. He went on to take the gold. He later contacted the doctor who treated him, told the doctor about his HIV status, and was relieved to discover there was no harm done. When he publicly revealed his HIV status, there was a movement to strip his medals from him. The Olympic Committee, however, declared Louganis had done nothing wrong. There was no chance for his bleeding in the pool to transmit HIV to any other competitor since the virus in such a small amount of blood could not survive in thousands of gallons of chlorinated water.
Reconciliation And it was his HIV status that helped him get closer to his father: “When my dad was diagnosed with cancer, I came out about having HIV. That’s how we came together. I cared for him in the last six weeks of his life.” Finally, the distance between the two of them was eliminated. “He told me I was doing for him what he could never do for me.” Louganis is ready to learn more about his Samoan heritage. While his folks were alive, he felt weird about investigating that side of him, as if looking into his birth-father’s ethnicity was somehow telling his parents (and his father’s Greek heritage) they were not good enough. “Now that my parents are gone, I’m incredibly curious about my Samoan roots. I’ve been embraced by the Samoan community, but I don’t know about Samoan culture. I will make that pilgrimage to Samoa for World AIDS Day.” From his resulting fame as a man with nerves of steel who happens to have HIV and a heart filled with compassion for those living in despair, Louganis has reached out to suicidal youth and people with HIV. The power of his temporary disaster has benefitted thousands and inspired millions. I asked him if that day was the most fateful one in his life - it was not. The difference was that the world witnessed it. All of that history, all of that baggage, all of those repercussions, all of those blessings, even redemption, wrapped up in the head-smack seen ‘round the world. EX PR ESSION 808.COM - a u gu s t 2015 | 13
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Media darlings like radio personality Mele Apana (a.k.a. Mento Mele) must be careful about what they say and do. They must not make waves, or it can cost them their jobs. Better to just lay low. It was the hearings in the Hawai‘i House of Representatives on SB1, the bill in favor of marriage equality, that opened Mele Apana’s eyes and kicked her into high gear. When she saw the aggression and the real threat of violence that equality supporters faced, she joined others in the rotunda the very next day, and called on others to do so. Not only did she get fired up, she also cooled down. The LGBT community and its allies faced the opposition without screaming at them, but also refused to bend for them. It was onipa‘a, stand firm, rather than active resistance. Apana said it was also kapu aloha, meeting the opposition with respect rather than with hatred (among other definitions). Kapu aloha has also helped her deal with people who do not honor her relationship with her fiancé, Makanani Akiona. Although the couple remains respectful to homophobic relatives, Makanani and Mele will not hide who they are and how they love each other. And kapu aloha has been the framework for the both of them and thousands of other activists as 14 | a ug us t 2 0 1 5 - E X P R ESSION808.C OM
The Evolution of
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Mento Mele By: Mickey Weems | Photos: JTL
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they work to protect the ‘aina, the land that we call home.
Tell us about you and your fiancé. I was born and raised on the island of Kaua’i, and I’m from the Apana ‘ohana, renowned entertainment and hula family. I’m a graduate of Kamehameha Schools and I have a Bachelor’s degree in Communications and Speech. I am a radio and TV personality, philanthropist, schoolteacher, and producer. I’ve been in the radio studio since age three and professionally on the radio for 17 years at these stations: KCCN FM100, ISLAND 98.5, HAWAIIAN105 KINE, POWER 104.3. My fiancé Makanani was born and raised Kailua, Hawai‘i, she is also a graduate of Kamehameha Schools. She received a Bachelor of Arts in Hawaiian Studies from University of Hawai‘i Manoa. She has a background in Land Stewardship and Natural Resource Management, and enjoys working with natural fiber arts, such as weaving, lei making, and working with the fibers of the wauke plant, which were used to make traditional Hawaiian clothing, also known as kapa. Makanani dances for Halau Mohala Ilima under kumu Hula Mapuana DeSilva, and has been with Mohala Ilima for 20 years.
How did you get the name, “Mento Mele”? It’s a nickname I got when I was in the seventh grade. My friends dressed me up and put M-E-N-T-O M-E-L-E on my forehead. It stuck ever since.
“Mento” - as in the brand of candy, Mentos? Yes.
You said SB1 changed everything for you because from that point on, you stood your ground without becoming the “Old Mele.” Explain. During SB1, I was beyond terrified. I 16 | a ug us t 2 0 1 5 - E X P R ESSION808.C OM
[L-R] M ak an an i Ak i o n a & M el e A p an a
was so scared. I remember having my stomach in my throat the entire week, and I couldn’t sleep or eat. But now when I look at that time, I am so grateful I was a part of it. We stood together and we fought for what was right. And even though it was tough, we made it. We were triumphant. And so because of that fight for equality, I am no longer afraid to stand for what I strongly believe in.
You say that LGBT people during SB1 showed kapu aloha. Could you define that for us? Kapu aloha is how we respect each other. It is reverence and peace towards one another. Remember how bad the tension was during SB1? So much hate and anger from the other side -
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imagine if they also used kapu aloha.
ing our ‘aina, equality, et cetera.
What kind of flack did you receive after saying over the air that you were going to the statehouse with your rainbow flag?
When you two work together for environmental causes, is one of you the spiritual activist and the other the scientist-activist?
I remember having a few calls on my radio show and there were two ladies who shredded me to pieces. They said, “Mele, you will burn in Hell, and we will tell everyone, ‘Don’t listen to Hawaiian 105 KINE!’” I felt so sad. However, I noticed I changed. The old Mele would’ve said, “Meet me after work, so I can give you dirty lickens for being pilau [stink]!” Instead, I said, “I’m sorry your light is dim. You don’t dim my light or my mana, and for every one person you tell ‘don’t listen’ to my show because you hate me, many more will listen!”
Though Makanani has background in conservation in Hawai‘i, we both use our spiritual ties to ground us when it comes to connecting to our ‘aina and our kupuna [elders, ancestors].
Do you think the Lahui [the Hawaiian people] are stronger because of SB1? Yes. We learned to stand and fight for each other. We fought for respect. We fought for human rights, and because of that fight, we became a stronger community. Kapu aloha shifted many of us in a hugely positive way. I noticed kapu aloha resonates in our everyday lives. I’ve seen it with my friends and even the way our Lahui conduct themselves, even on social media where the antagonizing words can really stir anger.
How has it made you stronger?
I am no longer afraid to stand up for what is pono. We have to shift our consciousness, whether you are Hawaiian or not, we all must work together to heal our planet, to heal our world, and to heal each other. And it also includes Makanani and I standing up for who we are when we are with relatives who don’t accept us. I’ve even told them about my work for marriage equality! But I never told my parents while they were alive about us - I was afraid. I wonder what might have happened because now I am strong enough to let them know.
You and your fiancé engage in activism together. It’s a beautiful thing. We are two different people, with completely two different identities, yet we have the same values, intentions, and passions. We try to set an example to the world. To have a partner that shares the same passion is magic and amazing! We both are active in perpetuating our culture, protect-
On how many causes have the both of you worked? We have stood behind equality, and not only have we been supportive with this movement in the state of Hawai’i, but throughout the world. We have traveled to Kaho’olawe, the island that has endured physical, emotional, and spiritual pain. We traveled to the island and got our hands dirty! And it was all about aloha ‘aina [love of the land], and igniting a relationship between self and land. On the same note, we are currently very engaged with the movement to protect Mauna Kea. This movement has brought people together, not just here in Hawai’i, but worldwide. It’s more than just a mountain. It’s about reconnecting to our ancestors. Makanani and I both believe in science, but we don’t believe in desecration of sacred land. We shall stand with our indigenous brothers and sisters around the globe. It is beautiful to see everyone reunite.
What is the state of Hawai‘i media, especially Hawai‘i radio, today? Hawai’i radio is missing a heartbeat and soul right now. I grew up in radio my entire life, and I know how effective Hawai‘i radio is with our local community, the audience and radio personalities like us. Unfortunately, because there is a monopoly on Hawai’i radio, we are not able to truly connect with our people and genuinely support our local artists.
So when are you going to start your own radio show? I hope to one day build my own and be part of a station that truly embraces our people. I envision a station that is not just about Hawaiian music, but more importantly about our people and community. We need to perpetuate our music, our artists, our language, our culture, and our heritage. It is our kuleana. EX PR ESSION 808.COM - a u gu s t 2015 | 17
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Carlos Chang’s gay agenda By: mickey weems | Photos: jtl
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“How about a reality show that mixes dancing with dating, and includes gay couples?” I was sitting with the talented dancer Carlos Chang, who much to my surprise accepted a slice of chocolate-macadamia nut pie - I thought such food was verboten for such an artist. If such culinary luxuries are a regular part of his diet, he appears not to suffer any negative consequences. He is fit and he moves like a cat. Chang had just told me about a proposal for a reality show in which dancers dated each other, but was not pursued because most of the male dancers were gay. I told him that his mission should be to start such a show. If the country can handle “Project Runway,” America could handle an equally queer dance and romance.
The arc of Chang’s career did not begin until his senior year in high school when he and his friends joined a class in swing. But what kicked him into high gear was the first time he had seen competitive Latin ballroom dancing in his hometown of Vancouver, Canada. From that moment on, he danced his way around the world.
Did you always want to be a dancer? I wanted to become what every little 6-year-old gay boy in Canada dreams to one day be... a champion figure skater, of course! I would watch skating competitions and I would mimic the jumps in my living room - for some reason, Kristi Yamaguchi would mesmerize me more than Kurt Browning. But when I approached my Peruvian-raised parents, they said no because it was too foreign to them - they had never been exposed to sports or art on ice - plus they also told me it was too feminine.
So when did dance kick in for you? I was born in Lima and raised in Vancouver. My parents took us to a Catholic Spanish-speaking church where immigrant families from all over Central and South America could interact. Many of the church events were accompanied by dance parties with live music. I developed a love for salsa, cumbia, cha-cha, merengue - anything with strong percussion and rhythm.
What was the life-changing event for you as a dancer? I heard about a style called Latin DanceSport and discovered that Vancouver was hosting a DanceSport competition. What I saw on that dance floor changed my life. The top 10 Latin dance couples in the world from Europe, Canada, and the U.S. were on the dance floor in this full-out dance battle. I jumped right into classes and within five years, my dance partner and I were winning contests internationally.
And your skills got you on TV... The television show “So You Think You Can Dance” had just emerged as a new and different reality show. This was the challenge I was looking for to keep me in top form, so I dove into the EX PR ESSION 808.COM - a u gu s t 2015 | 19
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local dance scene. I had the opportunity to put these new skills to the test when Christine Yasunaga, former dancer from “The Lion King” on Broadway, created a local reality show called “Destination Groove: Dance Hawai‘i” on KHNL. I was chosen as one of the top 12 finalists and was voted online as “Hawai‘i’s Favorite Dancer.” This gave me the courage to attempt So You Think You Can Dance, and I ended up being a five-time semifinalist on the national show on both U.S. and Canadian versions.
You were also in musical reviews? I discovered that I could sing when I performed in a 1940s musical revue named “Pacific Swing Hawai‘i.” This led to my audition for a new Hawai‘i children’s musical created by Johnson Enos named “Honu by the Sea.” I had just returned from the mainland and I had no music book with me, so I had to sing a song that I knew. The only one was “Part of Your World” from “The Little Mermaid,” so I introduced myself as a merman and sang my song. I ended up
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being cast as Shaka the Acrobatic Crab with my own song and dance number. The late and great Ron Bright directed this musical. I most recently returned from the national tour of “Guys and Dolls,” so here I am on a well needed break.
What kinds of prejudices have you seen in the world of competitive dance? In Louganis’ film “Back on Board,” Greg talks about the feeling of being shunned by the diving community for his sexual orientation and HIV status. This feeling of being different and judged for it is one that I recognized in my life during my competitive ballroom career. Being Peruvian and Chinese, I knew that there weren’t many people who looked like me, but when I entered the competitive ballroom world, this was even more apparent. Although the music of Latin ballroom dance is derived from various Central and South American countries, the organization of the technical art was formed in Europe.
Wait a minute - being of Peruvian descent was a detriment in Latin dancing competition? As you can see on “Dancing With the Stars,” almost all the professionals have been of European or Caucasian descent - this was not unlike the ballroom world in Canada when I first entered it. My competitive dance partner, Anastasia Pichugina, was originally from the Ukraine and grew up in Latvia. When we first appeared on the competitive dance floor, she was approached by several people who were originally from Eastern European countries. They told her point blank, “How dare you not dance with a Russian boy!” Needless to say, we beat them all.
But that was not the only bias you faced... Another interesting thing about the ballroom scene was that there was a reverse form of ageism where it was better to look older and more mature even when young. I suppose this preference for an older look derived from the portrayal of the man in the partnership to be as “masculine” as possible. My interpretation of this concept was more about representing myself as the leader instead of the concept of “manly” or “masculine.” This choice seemed to pay off in competition.
And being gay? It was also a surprise to me that when being social with other competitive dancers off the dance floor, being openly gay was not as accepted as I thought it would be. I had seen some partnerships where the EX PR ESSION 808.COM - a u gu s t 2015 | 21
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portrayal of “masculine” had led to certain male dancers pretending to be in a heterosexual romantic relationship with their female partners off the dance floor so that they could be judged higher in placings. I never chose to go down that path.
What about prejudice on Broadway? I discovered that certain productions would typecast their ensemble. I quickly learned that these choices were completely subjective and not to take them personally when auditioning. Being of Asian descent was one factor in my getting a role in “The King and I,” but I have been more fulfilled by landing roles where no racial type is preset, such as a Cagelle in “La Cage Aux Folles” or a gambler/gangster/newsboy in “Guys and Dolls.”
What has been happening with shows like Dancing With the Stars and “So You Think You Can Dance?” I was fortunate enough to interview with the producers of “Dancing With the Stars” last summer for the possibility of becoming a professional on an upcoming season. I am currently on a short list for the show. I have presented myself to the producers as a versatile artist that can dance with either a male or a female, and I can lead and follow. I would also like to be the first LatinAsian male professional from Hawai‘i on the show and represent multi-ethnic demographics.
You’ve also spoken with Greg Louganis about a project. I was recently introduced to Greg Louganis through a mutual friend who told me that Louganis had recently interviewed with “Dancing With the Stars.” I suggested he dance with a professional of the same sex - such as myself. He was very excited about the idea and we have both presented it to the producers of the program. We met in person at the Out Film Festival in LA where he was debuting his new documentary.
What kinds of projects do you have here in Hawai‘i? My teaching turned into a full-fledged dance school in Hawai‘i: Carlos Chang Dance. I train and choreograph for students of all ages and levels who want to learn Latin ballroom. I am very proud to say that I am the coach of the first couple from Hawai‘i to ever win a United States National Title in the championship level of Latin ballroom. I also have been very interested in using these shows as a platform to experiment with different cultural mediums and local visionary artists. In my last showcase called “Emotions: The Power of Dance,” I opened the show accompanied by the famous traditional drumming group Kenny Endo where we presented a number that began with a traditional Japanese drumming movement piece that evolved into a Chinese ceremonial lion dance and finished with Brazilian samba. 22 | a ug us t 2 0 1 5 - E X P R ESSION808.C OM
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Hector Hoyos as SisterFace
By: mickey weems | Photos: jtl makeup: charles ward
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“First, I love drama. The End!” Hector Hoyos does indeed love drama - especially when he puts on his colorful alter-ego, SisterFace, who is a recording artist and drag personality. His life has drama poured all over it. When he moved to Hawai‘i and spoke before members of the state legislature on HB-546, the bill that banned discrimination based on gender expression, he finally understood the potential he had, as Hector and SisterFace, to bring about dramatic change. Here’s his-and-her story.
Godzilla in Jackie-O Sunglasses I’m a huge 6’4’ Latin-German shock-andawe butch queen. As SisterFace, I can be seven and a half feet or taller. My alter-ego SisterFace is a cartoon character and gender-bending diva. I am not a woman, nor do I wish to be a fierce lady, but I look up to women as queens. I never know day to day whether I will be SisterFace or not. Japanese, Chinese, and the fabulous Australian tourists seem to adore me, and I very much all of them. I think the Japanese look at my vibrant character as a glamorous Godzilla and actually get me.
Nightmare I come from the Annapolis, Maryland area. My parents divorced when I was very young. I was argued over in court, and my father won custody when he should not have. He left me with people who watched me, took care of me, and raped me for over two years. I was told horrible things to make me keep my mouth shut or else. I was five or six years old. The whole time, I could have just been with my mother who tried so hard to keep me. This family was any child’s worst nightmare. I was forced at a young age to wet my bed, then sleep in it until morning, as I was tied to my plastic coated mattress. The sons would also take turns urinating on me during my sleep. Then they would make fun of me over breakfast before I went to school in clothes they pissed on. One day after being forced to give oral sex to the one brother, I hid under a huge holly bush so dense no would could see me. Instead of catching the bus to school, I slept under that bush. When I woke up, I waited till I saw the bus drop off kids, and acted like I was at school all day. My
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caretaker, Ms. Jerry, never asked because she couldn’t care less anyway.
“If You Walk Out That Door, I’ll Kill You” When I finally did go to school, my teacher asked why I was not there the week prior. She told me she would have to call Ms. Jerry, and I started crying my little eyes out. I remember the teacher calming me, telling me to hang in there just a little longer. She wanted to know from me who she should call, a person I trusted. I said my mommy, Bonnie. Two weeks later, I was hiding under the holly bush again on a hot afternoon. I remember a car pulling up with two women: one a red-haired hippy type, and my mother with her golden hair. I wanted to scream, but I just watched my mother go to the front door and bang hard a few times before one of the sons answered. “Ms Jerry, come to the front door or I’m coming in to get my son!” she yelled. At this time, I yelped something and my mother’s friend Michelle said, “Hector!” I ran out from the bush to her arms, just holding her tight. Michelle stood in front of me while my mother was arguing with Ms Jerry. When she told my mother she was coming out to take me back, my mother told her, “If you walk out that door, I’ll kill you!” My mother then picked me up, hugged me, and screamed in tears how she was so sorry. She put me in the car and hid me for a full year in the western Maryland mountains. My mother and her friends performed miracles to keep me from my father, the police, and child services until she could get a good lawyer, who brought everything before the judge and got her full custody. She was my superhero, the angel that saved me.
Queer Club Kids (Before Club Kids Were a Thing) I knew from a young age I was a boy who liked boys - the end! I knew it came from a deep inner feeling that was purely natural, not because of abuse. I think abusers just know how to take advantage of what they know when you’re too young to know anything. I was out and loud because I had a mother who not only supported me, she supported all the other LGBT kids in our neighborhood. EX PR ESSION 808.COM - a u gu s t 2015 | 27
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In 1984-85, we would get schooled by a cool older gay brother of one of my friends on where to go in the Baltimore-Washington, DC area for nightclubs. My friends and I were only 14 years old! I guess us all being tall in platforms and dressing up gave people something they’d never seen yet, like hippies were to the ‘60s. I went to the hottest venues and eventually threw my own parties all over the East Coast. In the clubs, I was a 250-plus pound drag child, screaming and running around in nothing but black pointed bullet bras and girdles, panties, and huge platform boots, leather trench coats and anything ornamental I could put on my big head. I was always thinking I was a supermodel, knowing damn well I wasn’t! I met characters such as Divine and the legendary John Waters, and hosted parties with such crazy vibrant entertainers like Grace Jones, Boy George, Loleatta Holloway, Martha Wash, Chaka Khan, Kristine W, Ultra Naté, and Barbara Tucker. I became a loud, in-your-face LGBT activist in the mid-1980s after I saw AIDS-HIV hit hard and fast. People were frightened to death to even go near those with the new disease. I saw man-divas, gay gods wither away to nothing and die within weeks - a whole layer of our LGBT history almost completely wiped out.
For Worse, For Better: When Everything Turned I moved to Hawai‘i in 2004. Everything was fine until I was fired from a job I loved in Waikiki for being too gay. My whole world fell apart.
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If I could lose my job for being my fabulous self, I couldn’t imagine how bad it was for transgender people. I testified for HB-546, the anti-discrimination bill in 2011, and I had a new awakening. Telling state legislators [as Hector Hoyos] about the harassment I faced in the workplace showed me how they needed schooling, and they got it from three awesome transgender divas and I, the lone drag queen. For the very first time, our elected officials discovered that you do not have to have sexual reassignment to be a transgender person, and that drag divas are not transgender, but are gender-queer. I honestly think it was all too much for the police chief and a few state leaders. We were four dolls pouring their hearts out, explaining why we deserve rights like everyone else, and we were so fearless! The light shined for us that day - I felt it. Through all the testimonies and committee meetings, you realize that not only can you make a difference, but you also learn which politicians are bought and sold.
Let’s Get Political SisterFace is fierce at getting people’s attention whether they want to notice her or not - I’m there and you will see me. But I learned that day that being fabulously vibrant can actually help turn things for the good. I want to use SisterFace to confront bullies through doing public appearances at public schools and college campuses across the country. I’ll end with saying I am seeking public office in the state of Hawai‘i in the future, and I will be using my character SisterFace fully when I campaign.
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