5 minute read
CYCLES MOTHER AND CHILD
CYCLES MOTHER AND CHILD
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By Maya Apostoloska
Finally, I can have a proper shower. All my children are sleeping now.
The last days have been busy for me, and I also have an infection in my eye. Last Friday, after I dropped off my children at school, I went to buy more diapers for my two youngest children. They had used all the reserves in three days because of their upset stomachs. I had no sleep at all, checking them constantly and changing diapers and bedsheets during the nights. I also felt a sorrowful pain in my left eye and had no time to check it out. In the shop where I bought the diapers, my friend Asta advised me to take my eye seriously as it looked swollen and smaller than the other eye. I had no time for that now. Where am I going to find time for that? But if I feel no good, I cannot take care of the children. So, I parked in front of the apothecary, who then asked me for a prescription for the eye drops. I called my GP and organised it quickly. Unfortunately, it didn’t help.
After my shower tonight, I applied for the second time today, drops of my breast milk in the eye. It felt very sticky.
I have been breastfeeding for the last eight years. I breastfed my three children for approximately two and a half years each. My youngest for three and a half years so far. We only stopped a week ago and still have that need to hug and be very close to each other, though. I am happy I didn’t stop him earlier. I also wouldn’t be able to use the mother’s milk in my eye. After two applications, my eye miraculously healed.
I am happy I didn’t stop him earlier. I also wouldn’t be able to use the mother’s milk in my eye. After two applications, my eye miraculously healed.
Reflecting at a point in my life when the canvas on the open-cinema stage had fallen, I was very critical, and several people rushed to help. I thought about how important it was to react humanly to things and am less judgemental these days. I feel more. Asta had reacted humanly toward me and reminded me I should take care of myself as well.
Motherhood; is the experience of having or raising a child. It has the same effect of adventure and spontaneity as childbirth, and every mother is a heroine in my eyes. Being a mother has taught me the purest lessons in my life. My children are my universe.
My children were conceived with a lot of complications and suffered during my pregnancy. I kept them to take care of them. I will grow and protect them until one day I leave them alone to stand on their own two feet and let them get up and walk through their life on their own. I promised that when I let them go, I will make sure they know I will always be here for them. I will always have their mind and heart with me.
Upbringing children requires time and nerves, and especially dedication and patience. As I get older, I slowly realise how much truth there is in that: it is not just about doing things you need to know how to enjoy them. It’s like when someone asks me if the painting is finished or not. It’s not about that; it’s about the enjoyment I have while painting multiple series on one canvas. I learned that it’s not about what I completed that is important, but the feeling of satisfaction when things finished.
Slowly, I become more aware of how much I have learned to live and work in a hurry. How the stress of getting things done as soon as possible has crippled and made me dependent on the time I am supposedly available. Living in a big city, these are the conditions I am governed by. I cannot buy time nor extend it, but that does not mean that I am just running through life without building memories. When I visit the village of my In-laws, the race for time is non-existent. There is something magical there. A vision that I imagine living when I get older, my art, the mountains, fresh air, smell of cows, a vegetable garden, many flowers, and eternal peace.
Maya Apostoloska
When I visit the village of my In-laws, the race for time is non-existent. There is something magical there. A vision that I imagine living when I get older, my art, the mountains, fresh air, smell of cows, a vegetable garden, many flowers, and eternal peace.
I remember my parents always told me not to hurry when I was doing something. I was a very impatient child, and today, I am the opposite. Very patient and calm. I do things differently, maybe slower, but with greater satisfaction. I have realised that I am the master of time.
In this modern century, the children grow surrounded by and together with technology as well. It seems parents arrange activities after school and weekends for their children to avoid chaos at home because of a busy workday at work, right? And they want a quiet weekend, right? I have the same feeling when children in the restaurant stare at the cell phones just to be quiet. This is not the way how to teach your child good manners and happens daily. For the sake of a moment of peace and our sanity, we are not animating the child; or teaching them from our heart. I am especially careful with all electronic devices when it involves my children. Parents ask me what are my children doing if they do not watch TV? Simple, they do art and crafts together with me, bake cookies, have arguments, cry, laugh and are learning to live a normal life.
