Faith Follows - Spring Issue Four 2019 by Faith Follows

FAITH FOLLOWS SPRING 2019 | ISSUE 4

FAITH FOLLOWS

[CONTENTS]

FAITH FOLLOWS

FAITH FOLLOWS SPRING 2019 | ISSUE 4

Rich Langton, 2017 Worship & Creative Conference

ACT I

ENTRY

Interview: Isy Isy

Isy Isy discusses new album release 12

Through his Lens

Carlos speaks on being raised into photography

Put a Belt on It

Cuppy Flores preaches on vocals 18

Is Art Subjective? Is art really art at all?

ACT II

FEATURES

Interview: Sarah Chung Sarah talks fashion and faith 58

Phyl Bautzer

Sex, drugs, rock and roll and... Jesus 70

Interview: Jungle Boi

Jungle Boiâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s love for music producing 96

Hopeless Hollywood

Sometimes the right dreams can motivate us for the wrong reasons

Staying the Race

Rich Langton shares on how to keep your creative edge

ACT III

LAST CALL

108

142

Cover: MondayMonday

Interview: Caitlin Lopez

A creative business story 120

Mariah Holden Poetry in motion 132

Acting goes beyond dreams 148

Why Art Matters

Does art really matter? A historical exploration

Jesse Swinford

Dance, art and authenticity

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[CONTRIBUTORS]

PHOTOGRAPHY Hayet Gessese, Carlos Solorzano, Jared Thomas, Ben Neale, Caleb George, Tiffany Williams

WRITING Cuppy Flores, Carlos Solorzano, Hayet Gessese, Mariah Holden, Phyl Bautzer, Jessie Swinford DESIGN CONSULTANT Phyl Bautzer

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EDITORIAL I’ve tried my hand at many things and taken shots in various forms. I began writing at an early age and gradually fell into the world of computers and video games because of my father’s second career in computer sciences. As a teenager, I romanticized about acting and in high school and did a stint as a police cadet. In college I studied business, did a year in Army ROTC and eventually moved back to California to study film. To my demise, film became my world for seven years. Now I find myself studying Pastoral Leadership at Hillsong College. My journey has taken me from the west coast of the United States to around world. I don’t taut that or throw around my weight when I say that. I’m nowhere near where I want to be in life… and that’s okay. The journey of the artist is like the path of a believer, perhaps best described by Robert Frost’s poem as the path less 6

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traveled on. It takes grit to walk this journey. It’s hard. There are sleepless nights and skipped meals. There’s time spent away from family and hardest of all, time spent alone, crafting, creating, ideating and dreaming. The journey of the artist isn’t easy. It’s self-imposed pressure, dedication spent into the unseen hours, time spent developing and if the intentions aren’t pure, the motivations to why you’re pursuing your craft can be corrupted. That’s why I decided to theme the fourth issue for the artist. This issue is for you. This magazine is for your resilience to follow a passion, even when it seems wild, reckless and when society tells you to find a real job because what you’re dreaming for is unwise, ridiculous and out of reach. To my fellow dreamers, protect that dream. When it feels like you are no where near where you want to be, keep believing. God has gifted you with an ability, so use it and keep pursuing the

calling on your life. Traveling on this road makes a worn path for those who come after you. So keep trailblazing, keep pioneering and keep dreaming. The world needs you. Hayet Gessese Founder & Publisher

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[ACT] I Isy Isy 10 | Put A Lid On It 12â&#x20AC;&#x2030;| Is Art Subjective? 18 | Through My Lens 22

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ARTIST SPOTLIGHT

Isy Isy

Why did you choose music as a career? Music always seemed to me to be a some what unobtainable career path for me so I ignored my want to do it for most of my teens, then in my early 20s I started to realise that if I didn’t try then I would eventually be living in regret. The first time I started to make money from music was djing and it paid my bills all through while I was studying and well, still kinda is. Music is something you have to be happy just doing I think, whether you make money or not, but in saying that I have studied a lot about music business as well as the audio side to give me a really good handle on how I am going to get to where I want to be. How do you keep going? What’s your motivation? Each time I get down on my process or feel like it’s taking too long to get where I want to be I find myself remembering how much I just wanted to be doing music daily and express myself and then I realised that everything else is just a bonus.

And to answer the legacy question, well, I want people to connect with the idea that anything is possible, I want to prove to myself and everyone else that anything is possible, and I want to be the person that went against all odds and won. Even if only I know it. Any album release plans for 2019? Album release! Yes indeed! My debut album levels has been creeping and brewing for the passed two years and I am so damn excited to finally release! It has a taste of so many different styles and genres but yet still holds on to one underlying scent that pulls you the whole way through. When I first realised I was going to start to share and take my music seriously I agreed with myself that I would only begin to release once I had 2 full albums in the works so this is what I did. The “Levels” album will be released mid this year but I plan to release another at the end of the year also.

What do you want to do with your music and what kind of legacy do you want to have when it’s all said and done? There’s so much I want to do with my music and I even see myself later being a part of other acts as well as my own, like touring and contributing with another band would be fun and is something I’d like to do. But mainly I want to accomplish what I set out to, release my album and some people to listen, pretty simple I guess. 2019 for me is about redefining my live show and touring, and by 2020 summer I want to be touring internationally. FAITH FOLLOWS

Cuppy Flores

Put a Lid on It

I’ve been a vocalist for many years of my life. I participated in many “singing” opportunities like choirs and leading corporate church worship. I’m not an expert by any means but being a participant in such things has made me understand that there is power in vocals! For a long time, I thought that the power in vocals came from the vocal pedagogy of singing. One of the most intriguing things about singing is the technical aspect of it. For example, when you begin to take lessons from a vocal trainer they open up a new world for you. For some of us, this an unknown world! You learn things like good breathing techniques, air support and how well you sound is dependent upon, you guessed it, breathing. You also learn about different vocal styles, vocal 12

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health and how to project sound in powerful ways. I can go on and on about the technical parts of it because there is so much to technique that goes into singing the smallest of notes. However after all these years, I’ve discovered that the “power in vocals” doesn’t come from the technicalities (although it is important). It actually comes from the message you extend to the world when you open your mouth to sing. Being a vocalist is like having a super power! You have the ability to captivate an audience and have their full attention in one instance. It’s fascinating! You have the ability to share your super power with the world and use it for life or death!

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â&#x20AC;&#x153;Being a vocalist is like having a super power! You have the ability to captivate an audience and have their full attention in one instanceâ&#x20AC;?

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I’m not one to judge how one uses their singing ability but I will say our sound can be a contribution to changing the world one note at a time. These days singing for me looks like singing worship in my shower or in my quiet moments at home. I don’t necessarily have a “platform” to sing from but I continue to do it with no audience because singing isn’t about the platform you stand on or the people you sing to, but more than anything the declaration you sing out. There’s power in singing through our struggle, our fear and our

unforeseen circumstances! That has been the case for me. Singing is my ultimate expression of worship for God. I connect with God when I sing through my trials, heartaches and disappointments. Some people journal, some people listen to podcasts... I sing. I feel thankful that God gave me the ability to connect through sound. It’s one of the most unexplainable things. I delight in being able to worship God with my mouth and will continue to do so for the rest of my days.

“Singing isn’t about the platform you stand on or the people you sing to, but more than anything the declaration you sing out”

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Hayet Gessese

Is Art Subjective?

What constitutes as art? In our contemporary post-modern society, art can be anything. Splash some paint on a canvas and you have art. A couple of strokes to make a sketching and you have a painting: art. Mesh together some words and you have poetry: art. Select a couple of instruments and let them play together in Garage Band or Logic and you have music: art. But what’s the underlying factor that determines the validity of an expression being classified as art, regardless of the medium? Is all creation art either good or bad? I wanted to explore what constituted a creation being classified as art and I found myself pondering the question: “what is art?” That’s a question I think all of us should take the time and answer. What is art, and what distinctions and characteristics make art, well, art?

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The Oxford dictionary defines art as: “The expression or application of human creative skill and imagination, typically in a visual form such as a painting or sculpture, producing works to be appreciated primarily for their beauty or emotional power;” and “Works produced by human creative skill and imagination.” I know. It’s quite cliché to use a dictionary definition to define a word but I think in our case, it actually helps get down to the bottom of this. Art is an expression of human creative skill and imagination. Art is also appreciated for it’s beauty and the emotion it evokes out of its audience. We could stop there and call this quits but I know there’s more to this word ‘art’ than a textbook definition. Let’s break it down shall we? The word art

comes from Old French and from the Latin word ‘artem’ which means to prepare and fit together. I like the Latin definition for a multitude of reasons, one being its simplicity but the other is that art is perfectly described as ‘fitting together.’ I’m not sure what background you come from, what cultural upbringing you had but when you create something, whatever it is, you bring together usually more than one element to create said object. Two parts water and one parts hydrogen makes water, you take the color blue and red and it makes the color purple, pounds of aluminum, hardware chips and many unknown materials make up a computer and laptop... the list goes on. I believe the same applies to art. You take more than two materials and put them together and you have art. After all the definition of art is ‘fitting together.’

Â© untitled 1982, Jean-Michel Basquiat

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Based on this logic, fitting together any number of sounds to make music can be defined as art. Fitting together some scrap metal and a brick can be defined as modern art. Splotching paint on a canvas with no rhyme or reason is also defined as art. But now we come into the dilemma of what is art and what is an imitation of art? I can very much well chant hysterically into a voice memo on my iPhone, make some clicking sounds in another voice memo and layer those into tracks in Logic and have ‘art.’ But is that really art or is that just a bunch of sounds? It’s hard to argue either way because by definition, art is an expression of human creative skill. But it hardly takes any skill to do what I just described. I used to think art, particular bad music that fell into this category, wasn’t art because it didn’t take much skill to create what the ‘artist’ intended. On the other side of creative expression, you have post modernism where conceptual, multimedia

or installations are considered art. Imagine walking into an art exhibition and you walk past some post-modern paintings, classical paintings and then you stumble across a white wall with just one black circle. It makes you think and wonder what the artist’s intentions were and perhaps you may walk away scratching your head because you didn’t know what the circle meant. Today we consider creative expressions like this as art. But is this really art or is it just an imitation posing as art? I realize this is a hypothetical question and I’m aware that I’m raising a multitude of questions. I’m genuinely curious as to what we as a society label as art. Years ago I wouldn’t have dared to call this creative expression art. It wasn’t good, therefore it wasn’t art. To me art was a sacred word. It meant that it took every neuron of your brain to creatively conceptualize and craft art.

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Photo courtesy of Art Shay, Buddy Guy & Junior Wells, 1965

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It would take years of mastery to stroke a paint brush to make a painting like the Mona Lisa and years of practice to play the guitar like Buddy Guy, Muddy Waters, B.B. King, John Mayer or sing a note like Billie Holiday or Freddie Mercury. My idea of art was artistic perfection; masterpieces. But I suppose like any master artist, you have to make bad art before you become a master in your respective field. In this regard, art is no longer subjective. It is up to the audience to appreciate pieces of artwork whether there are master works or works that need, well, more work. Any attempt to create something is, and shall be considered art. It’s an open market to enter and create. Whether it’s highly skilled or not, by definition what we create is art and it’s not up to the subjectivity of the one looking or hearing to make that judgment call. That my friend is rather encouraging to know.

“Any attempt to create something is, and shall be considered art”

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Through his Lens

Carlos Solorzano

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In 1980 the political climate in El Salvador had taken a turn for the worse. A 12-year civil war affected the lives of many Salvadoran civilians, including my father Carlos Alberto Solorzano. The military deliberately targeted and terrorized its civilians by death squads, recruited child soldiers and violated human rights. At the age of 18 in 1982, my father’s neighborhood was greatly affected and he witnessed the deaths of some of his closest friends. Because he feared for his own life, he was forced by his father to flee the country to the United States with his brothers. Not being able to finish his studies back home, he had to find a way to make means upon arriving to Los Angeles, CA. He soon found a job at a hotel doing custodial services but sought other opportunities that would provide more financial stability. A family friend from El Salvador reached out to him and told him that he had a lot of job opportunities through photography and asked if he was willing to learn the craft. My father didn’t hesitate to take this opportunity because the necessity to survive in a foreign country was vital to his own well-being. In 1984 he began what was called “coupon-photography,” a door to door service that provided family portraits that anybody was interested in. After he learned the basic foundations of photography and shooting family portraits, Los Angeles was beginning to be saturated by photographers doing the same so he looked for more couponphotography opportunities up north in Ventura/Monterey County, five hours north of LA. In 1986 he received amnesty after seeking citizenship in the United States and met my mother through work. My mother became pregnant with me and my father moved her down to Los Angeles, where I would be born on December 7, 1987 in Compton, CA.

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Little did my father know that what he did out of necessity would become a passion and art to me. My name is Carlos Ivan Solorzano and I’m a photographer.

“When I was 11 he handed down my first film camera”

I remember growing up and having many photos and photo albums around my mother’s house. On weekends at my father’s house I was surrounded by film cameras, lenses and lighting gear. My dad would constantly take family portraits and headshots of our own family while my mom would love taking pictures with disposable cameras. He would occasionally take me to the photo lab to get his portraits printed or mounted on wooden frames for his clients. It was there that I would also meet a lot of his photographer friends as they shared their work and stories with each other. Enamored by my dad’s environment and process, my dad started taking me to help him set up for his photo shoots. Soon after that he began taking me to weddings and quinceañeras for extra income and my interest in spending more time with my father lead me to helping him work weekend gigs. Because I was still a kid, my only responsibilities were to help him carry his equipment, pass out business cards and sell packets of photos to the attendents. When I was 11 he handed down my first film camera so I could take whatever photos I wanted to learn the basics. I soon began taking pictures of what I thought looked “cool,” and I started printing them for my own personal albums. As the years went on, I would help my father by taking more photos at events. Like a typical teenager at the age of 17, I had asked my parents for a part time job at the mall to try and get some money to go out with my girlfriend and friends. My mother strongly disagreed and rationalized that it would take me away from my studies at the time; so my dad offered me to help him out with his wedding and quinceañeras as a videographer. I soon began to learn from his colleagues how to film these events and was taught how to be creative with shots to tell a story.

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I further developed my eye for storytelling and photography in my college years where I began an interest in film production. I ended taking up many forms of art like film and photography classes that helped expand my perspective on composition, lighting, shapes, and most importantly, story. Telling story through the lens was probably one of the most influential skills that I use in my photography and it went beyond the fundamentals and necessity that my father had taught me. After years of observing, learning, and applying different artistic skillsets, I was able to hone all that information into photography. My heritage and being raised in LA play a big part of how I see stories through a lens. LA is a bright city with many failed dreams, empty promises and heartbreak. My parents came to LA for a better life and allowed me to learn how to survive in my own city the way they did. LA breeds many different forms of wars that each individual has to face. These wars are mostly internal and force use to look at our ‘necessities’ of living out our own definitions of what life should really be like. I was fighting a different kind of war than my father, and still am. We can either give up in the midst of adversity, or we can press on like my my father did and learn to adapt to better our lives so that we can tell our stories of struggle and triumph to empower others to continue fighting. This always leads me back to the basics: telling stories. Its always been about creating content to give a voice where there maybe isn’t one. Of course “Hollywood” doesn’t really play by those rules and it creates an ugly version of what content is; but going back to the basics have really allowed me to enjoy the moments and stories I am able to capture and share with people. Looking back after all these years, I guess it’s a different kind of necessity that my father had, a necessity to create and inspire and tell his story through photography. All in all, I thank my father for passing down a torch that has brought me great understanding of the world we live in, and I’m grateful to have the abilty to capture it all. 30

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“I guess it’s a different kind of necessity that my father had, a necessity to create and inspire”

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[ACT] II Sarah 38 | Phyl 58 | Rich 70 | Jungle Boi 84 | Hopeless Hollywood 96

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SA RAH From New York to Sydney, Sarah shares her intimate journey

Photography by Hayet Gessese

Written by Hayet Gessese

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Sarah Chung hails from New York City where the stereotype for native New Yorkers is ambitious, ‘get things done and do it at a fast pace.’ Sarah possesses all those qualities but does it with such love, grace and a gentle and kind heart that one might wonder if she actually is from New York. The multitalented fashion designer doubled as a graphic designer while she attended Hillsong College as a fulltime pastoral leadership student. In her time at college she helped pioneer the Frontline Creative team in Sydney at the Hillsong City Campus and led two successful campaigns for the ministry. Sarah’s fashion work has been featured in multiple magazines. She is currently one of the lead fashion designers for the startup fashion label The People Vs. Her enthusiasm for the church and denim are just the some of the small details that come to mind when people think of Sarah. Her heart for Christ and her love for people shine above all. How did fashion design come about? I grew up as a classical violinist and thought about pursuing a career in that field and I definitely grew an appreciation for it, but I knew that this wasn’t it. I knew I wanted to do something in the creative realm but didn’t know how, so I started with Fine Arts in High school. FAITH FOLLOWS

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Once I started college in NYC and did my foundation year, I grew really inspired by what people were wearing on the streets. That’s when I knew I wanted to learn more and be trained as a fashion designer. Classical Violinist? Please do elaborate… My parents wanted me and my sister to be well rounded in a variety of different things. They wanted us to experience and learn things that they couldn’t when they were young. Playing violin was one of the many things that my parents allowed me to learn. I played for a little over 13 years and have been able to play in an orchestra (FYO) for many years. I considered going to college for classical music but decided to explore visual arts which has ultimately lead me to learn fashion design in university. How has your heritage played a part in developing who you are? Over the past year in 2018, I began to realize how much my heritage has played a part in developing who I am today. I have always associated myself as American and did not want to really want to know about my Korean heritage. I grew up in Miami and there wasn’t a large Korean community. The Korean community that I did encounter was on a Sunday at a Korean small Presbytarian church that my family attended. Coming to Australia and attending Hillsong College where students are from all over the world, I was challenged to face aspects of my identity

that I was trying to hide or run away from. I’ve realized by being open to some of these facets to my identity, that there is so much more to what I’ve previously stereotyped or even assumed. I have found that there is so much that I don’t know about my heritage but by being more open to listen and ask questions, I started to see the beauty in my heritage. Most importantly, I was able to connect with my parents and my family on a deeper level and relate and talk to them. How close are you with your family? Did you grow up in a Christian home? I’m incredibly close with my family. My family is currently living in NYC and we talk almost everyday. I am especially close with my mom and must say that she is my favorite person. I’m realizing more and more how much of an incredibly selfless woman she is. As I talked about before, I grew up in a Korean Presbytarian church and my parents sent me and my sister to every youth camp, church event and worship night! Can you briefly describe your coming to God moment? I decided to do my own thing and stopped going to church when I started college. I rebelled all throughout those years. After 6 years of doing my own thing and trying to do everything in my own strength, I was worn down and heavy burdened of what the world says is good for you.

“After 6 years of doing my own thing and trying to do everything in my own strength, I was worn down and heavy burdened of what the world says is good for you”

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My super gracious friends that dealt with my “rebellious” years kept inviting me to a church that they attended. After years of asking me, one day I said yes. I sat by myself one Sunday and knew that God was speaking to me through the message. I knew in my heart that at that moment, he was telling me that he valued me and that I didn’t have to carry the heavy load that I was carrying. I decided at that moment to seek a relationship with Jesus. What are the fashion influences or any influences that have impacted your work? Music has always played an influential part in the way that I design. I have always been driven by creating strong concepts and having good research behind what the concept is for a collection. I’m extremely interested in street fashion and what people are wearing in all areas of the world. My training at my previous job at Ralph Lauren has been more traditional in what people are accustomed to wearing. I think there is something about taking something traditional and transforming it into something familiar but different. Can you talk about your time at Ralph Lauren? What was that like and what did it teach you? I worked at Ralph Lauren for 4 years designing Men’s denim at Polo, Black Label and Purple Label. The company trained me specifically in looking at vintage detailing from wash, fabrication, trim details, etc.

“When designing, there is definitely the tension between literal and conceptual as there is with traditional and progressive. I think as a clothing designer, you get to make a decision to stand in the tension of both paradoxes and make a decision to find a good balance within the tension of the two”

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I learned so much about denim wash at the company and loved working with the wash team and production team. The people that I worked with gave me so much opportunity to trial different things and brought me under their leadership to learn about the industry and the brand. I learned how to communicate with factories on a product development stand point and have really grown an appreciation to what it takes to produce a garment. You talked about traditional vs progressive. Whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the tension you face when designing? Are you looking to bend the rules now that you already have that traditional training? I heard a message from Robert Fergusson about paradox and I can relate that theme to almost everything. When designing, there is definitely the tension between literal and conceptual as there is with traditional and progressive. I think as a clothing designer, you get to make a decision to stand in the tension of both paradoxes and make a decision to find a good balance within the tension of the two. What was the moment when you wanted to give up, and how did you overcome it? I wanted to give up in design, about this time last year. I had already bought my ticket to move to Sydney and my time had come to an end in the previous company that I was working for. I went through a very intense year and I felt burnt out and did not want to have anything to do with design. I later realized that the opportunities that were opening for me were in design. During my time here in Sydney, I had the most incredible people that have encouraged and prayed for me to find vision and purpose.

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Having trusting and caring people to do the journey with that challenge you to seek God first in everything that you do, makes you feel like you’re able to overcome anything.

that it would make me look weak or people would think that I couldn’t handle it. I’ve learned that it’s better to have a “no” so that you can give your one hundred to the things you’ve said “yes” to.

You mentioned burnout. What challenges have you faced in your time in New York City? How did that develop you as a person?

Having those people in your journey are foundational in doing life. Who have those people been?

Burnout is a massive thing that I’ve experienced for myself and also have seen many colleagues and individuals in the industry face. It’s a real thing. The real challenge that I faced was learning to be transparent in saying “No” and also having good communication with the people that I work with. I took on a lot of things and kept taking on more and more because I was afraid to say “no,” thinking

This is such a hard question because there are SO many people! I have made incredible friends here in Sydney as well and I am so grateful for them. They have literally seen a lot of ugly from me and have yet to be my biggest supporters here. I have a friend named June who I did college with. She always kept me in check. I’m grateful for her because she keeps it real and even though times got

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difficult last year, we always seemed to find a good laugh through it. I think she is one of those people who Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m so blessed to do life with. Have you always had that support from your family and friends back home? My family and friends back home have always been encouraging and supportive. I really feel like God has brought me people that have really been so supportive of my journey. My family has always been supportive of me. Can you talk a bit about your past accomplishments?

Well, this is uncomfortable! I graduated from Parsons the New school, in 2011 and my first job out of college was at Ralph Lauren. I worked there for four years and a door opened to start a new activewear brand at Spanx. I took the opportunity and worked there for two years. After the two years came to a close, I worked as a designer at a company called R13Denim for two and a half years in denim design. I also had the incredible opportunity to serve with such incredible people in the creative world here in Sydney through Frontline Creative. They have literally been such an answered prayer for me and helped me so much to grow and learn in partnering with the Holy Spirit to build the church. What was moving to Sydney like and how did that affect you? FAITH FOLLOWS

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â&#x20AC;&#x153;I think praying and having conversations with God is the most incredible thing. The fact that we can hear from Him and communicate with Him anytime and anywhere humbles meâ&#x20AC;?

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Moving to Sydney was such a challenging decison for me.

the most incredibly thing. The fact that we can hear from him and communicate with him anytime and anywhere As this year progressed, I realized that I had so much humbles me. I’ve been reminding myself to communicate security in my job title, finance and relationships that I’ve with him more and more each day with the little things as built in NYC. Moving so far away from everything that well as the big things. Phillipians 4:6-7. I was comfortable and familiar with has allowed me to realize that my dependency and security is firstly in Jesus. I had the revelation that everything else needs to flow out of What do you think God was trying to show you this that stance. past year? I think this past year, I had a revelation of God as a good father. He’s good because that’s who he is and that’s regardless of what I do for him. I had this revelation when I I truly feared and cared about what other people thought first became a Christian and over the past couple of years, I think I lost sight of that. But this past year, I was reminded of me and their expectations of me. I put so much pressure to live up to the expectations of again of his goodness and that he was and always will be others. All these different voices and opinions distracted a good father. I think that brought me so much freedom in me from listening to the voice that actually truly mattered. every aspect of my life. There is so much freedom in knowing whose voice to listen to and whose opinion matters the most in your life. This is definitely an ongoing journey but I’m definitely What’s next? making progress. I finished up my time at college and have headed fulltime into designing at The People Vs. I’m excited to see how God will be connecting the dots for design and the market place Whose voice matters the most in your life now? for reaching people that have not yet been reached. God! I think praying and having conversations with God is What things mattered then that didn’t matter now?

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P H Written by Phyl Bautzer

Photography by Hayet Gessese

Fall, redemption, Phylâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s journey is the road less traveled

Y 58

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On a cold night of December 2013, I sat down for dinner at my aunt’s dining table in the warm embrace of my estranged family. Their faces were familiar, their love was real but the picture felt foreign. They had just started to become a part of my life the previous year and this was only our second attempt at becoming a “normal” family. At the time it felt like I wasn’t even there. The isolation I was experiencing in that moment was a reflection of the desperation and emotional pain I had suffered for many years. Everyone around me cared for me and loved me but my mind was trapped in a distant land, tormented by destructive thoughts. It was a time where I could barely contain my tears long enough to see their faces distinctly, let alone witness their joy. My entire being was aching and everything was darkness in my life.

he said thereafter changed my life forever: “Do you expect to have a different dish if you put all the same ingredients into the same pot over and over again?” I knew exactly what he meant and those words cut through my soul like a double-edged sword. He continued and said “the reason I never get angry or sad is because I have a friend I can always turn to for guidance and comfort.” I naively asked him, “cool, can you introduce me?” He smiled and paused before he said, “his name is Jesus Christ.”

In the midst of my solitude and despair, something about my uncle caught my eye. He was a man who dealt with tremendous pressures and responsibilities every day, but his attitude never wavered. After dinner I approached him and asked if we could talk. He took me to his office and patiently waited for my tears to dry out. After gathering myself I muttered: “How come you never get angry or sad? I see you dealing with stressful situations every day and you’re always full of joy. My life is a mess and no matter what I do, everything turns to ruin.” I was barely able to finish my sentence before my emotions spiraled out of control. What

Could this Jesus bring light into my darkness?

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At the sound of his name, I burst into tears, as I imagine the prodigal son did thousands of years ago when he plunged — defeated and humiliated — into the arms of his loving father.

Later that night, I stepped outside in the cold winter snow, got down on my knees and begged, “God if you really exist, I give you permission to take control of my life. I’ve tried my own way and have failed time and time again. I give up, I can’t do this anymore. I hate this life. Get me out of this place…” My life was radically different before I surrendered ownership of it to Jesus Christ.

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“I became the singer of a hardcore heavy metal band when I was 16. We were idealists. We fought for animal rights and our lyrics were very political”

I was born into a Christian family but God wasn’t really part of my education. Both of my parents are from Brazil but I was born and raised in Belgium. My grandfather on my mother’s side is a pastor but I unfortunately never benefited from the sound foundations of his Christian faith until I turned 32. My parent’s violent separation at the age of 5 led to the abandonment of my mother and her extended family. This created a void which never ceased to increase. A series of disappointments and multiple betrayals in my teenage years made me very angry at the world. My only way out at the time was through music. I became the singer of a hardcore heavy metal band when I was 16. We were idealists. We fought for animal rights and our lyrics were very political. Most of us came from broken homes so loud angry screams and powerful guitar riffs seemed like the perfect way to vent our pain and frustration. We toured Europe extensively a year later and went on to sign a record deal with the biggest European hardcore record label at the time. This gave us more visibility and access to bigger platforms and bigger tours. In July 2001, we became the first ever European hardcore band to tour the US. It wasn’t a big tour but for five 20 year old kids, it was wilder than anything we had ever dreamed of doing. With the exposure and achievement came tremendous pressures from record labels, managers, promoters and fans. We were young, naïve and inexperienced. A few

months later, there was so much tension between us, we parted ways in the most destructive way. We started our journey as brothers – thick as thieves – but we ended up backstabbing each other until hatred became the last man standing. Seeing my closest friends leave my life revived old wounds of the past. By the age of 21, I had lost faith in family, friends and people. I became this dark version of myself and I set out to avenge the pain I continually experienced growing up by treating everyone else like they were lesser beings. I became extremely arrogant and the accolades I received from my musical accomplishments didn’t help tame the monster. A year after the split, I was recruited to join another band and became one of the lead singers/guitarists and songwriters. Having learned so much from my previous experience in the music business, we turned it into a “carefully marketed emo boys band.” To tell you the truth, we spent more time straightening our hair and working on our stage presence than actually working on our music. If you’d see the pictures, you’d laugh. Our music was good, but not as good as our brand identity or our synchronized leg kicks. I was just starting my career as a graphic designer and this was the perfect outlet to put everything I learned in college into practice. We quickly started touring in Europe but contrary to my early days, it wasn’t about defending ideals anymore but was more about success. FAITH FOLLOWS

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“I was 26, broke, an addict and I was living with my parents. It was humiliating. I felt forced to give up on my dreams of becoming a rock star”

We were on the road a lot and with the touring came the lifestyle. With no values to keep me grounded, the passion for music gave way to a passion for parties, success and women. Drugs, alcohol and sex rapidly took center stage. The rest was simply dead weight. On the surface, it seemed like I was having the time of my life. But deep down… It was a different story. I was sinking into depression and addiction. One by one, my lifelong friends tried to rescue me by calling for group interventions but I was too stupid and full of myself to listen. I lost some really good friends and hurt some really good people. In January 2006, I went on the biggest tour of my life. I played in 21 different cities and 11 countries in the span of 23 days. On the night of my 25th birthday, we were playing at a renowned venue in Germany where legends like The Who and The Beatles had played many years before us. That night, I became the worst version of myself and did something I never thought I was be capable of. I remember looking in the mirror after the fact and not recognizing the man I had become. How had I sunk so low? Where had the idealist run off to? I came back from the tour and tried desperately to get my life back together. It worked… but only for a while. 66

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Because of growing tensions within the band, partly due to my destructive behaviors and bad attitude, the other lead singer suddenly left the band on the eve of a tour without notice. I felt abandoned all over again. What I didn’t know at the time was that I was creating this pattern in my life because of my behavior. One can only imagine how a victim of a childhood abandonment would react 20 years later to a similar situation, only this time under the influence of toxic mind-altering substances. Without a platform to sing from or the comfort of praises, all that was left was the drugs, the booze, a nagging ache and a deafening void. I was 26, broke, an addict and I was living with my parents. It was humiliating. I felt forced to give up on my dreams of becoming a rock star and had no other choice than to focus on my career as a graphic designer and get myself a “real job.” I was recruited that same year by the head of the Levi’s marketing department after she saw one of my illustrations in a trendy magazine. And so I began my career in advertising. If you know anything about advertising, you’ll know that it’s no different from the world I had spent the last ten years of my life in.

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“I have yet to stumble upon a word that adequately describes how grateful I am”

The parties and glamour continued, except this time I was making more money and traded beers for champagne. I was hungry for success and wanted to be the best. I won my first award in 2009 and gradually gained national recognition throughout my career. I moved my way up the ladder and ultimately became the head of the design department for a large European agency. I was fortunate to work on some great projects and work with some seriously talented people but no matter how many awards I received or how many big contracts I signed, the void followed me. I remember sitting at my desk one day thinking, “is this all there is?” In November 2016, I had a profound encounter with God that ultimately resulted in me moving to Sydney to pursue His call and purpose for my life. God radically opened my eyes that winter. He helped me realize I wasn’t living the life He intended me to live. I suddenly awoken to the reality that every experience, good and bad led me to Jesus Christ. In a moment, the pain of the past turned into gratitude. That day He gave me two verses. The first was Genesis 12:1 – “The Lord had said to Abram, “Go from your country, your people and your father’s household to the land I will show you.” The second was Joshua 1:9 – “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord

your God will be with you wherever you go.” I didn’t know what I was saying yes to but I knew it was going to be far and I would need courage. That day I made the decision with God that I would spend the rest of my life using my gifts so He could bring healing to those, who like me, had lost all hope in life. In that time I thought back to that cold night many years ago. The hopelessness and despair I once felt that cold night of December 2013, gave way for Jesus to bring hope and peace and light into my once dark and desolate life. I have yet to stumble upon a word that adequately describes how grateful I am. My journey has taught me many things but if there’s one thing I believe I should highlight, it’s that success means nothing and fulfills nothing. Seeking validation from others leaves you empty and insatiably thirsty. Whether you were like me and are trying to fill a void or whether you secretly dream of success and wrap it all in a nice holy and godly robe, self-glorification in a robe is still self-glorification. Thrive, but be humble enough not to seek a position or a title. Success to me today is being obedient and faithful to God. So stop trying to be the best. Instead, be the best you can be in the eyes of your Creator. FAITH FOLLOWS

R I C H Written by Hayet Gessese Photography by Various Artists 70

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â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Staying the raceâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; and fighting the good fight comes with its own battles. Rich shares where his journey has taken him and how it has shaped the man he is now

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ich Langton from an outside perspective is at the height of a pastoral career. As one of the global creative pastors at Hillsong Church, the other being his wife Cass, Rich leads one of the most influential creative teams for one of the most influential churches in todayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Christian world. Despite his title and position, Rich remains humble as ever, approachable and his title says exactly who he is: pastor. I had the opportunity to officially meet Rich at the 2018 Worship & Creative Conference and we conducted this interview online via email. Richâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s story paints the picture of perseverance and character. A man who has stayed the path and has run the race in his own lane. How did you get to where you are now and what brought you to it? As the creative pastor at Hillsong church in Sydney, Australia, my role is to oversee the day to day running of a large, ever evolving department that is committed to faithfully retelling the gospel story creatively and engaging the church in worship. We oversee production teams, video editors and story tellers, stage and set designers, project coordinators, musicians and worship leaders, singers, songwriters and sound engineers. The vastness of this gift is evident and I am grateful to God that my journey has rounded my skills across a range of disciples that assist me with all this. I grew up in church, the son of Baptist turned Pentecostal parents. I studied theology at an Anglican seminary and then we found our way to Hillsong Church in Sydney, FAITH FOLLOWS

“God has created us all with gifts and talents. Each of us have unique skills, things that we can do naturally, or that we have a tendency toward”

Australia in 1997. I had studied graphic design after high school thinking to become an industrial designer, then got involved in a start up company as the internet was really becoming “a thing” and have often found myself on the cusp of new technology and advancement. I have run my own businesses, wrestled with cashflow and the tensions of ministry and full time work, asking questions of purpose and meaning and what God’s intention are in our vocational calling. All these stages and steps have set me up for now, and have enabled me to relate to the people who we are called to lead and to pastor. It hasn’t always been easy, but hindsight is an invaluable gift in seeing God at work amongst all the highs and lows that at the time I questioned and queried. I now see how God was at work, using everything for His good plan. You said you wrestled with God and the intention of your vocational calling. So many people myself included wrestle with what they are supposed to do. That they feel that they’re too old to be doing x,y,z. Can you speak into that and share a bit of your wrestle? It’s a great question. These days the way I think about this is quite practical. God has created us all with gifts and talents. Each of us have unique skills, things that we can do naturally, or that we have a tendency toward. My perspective is that we should explore those things, focus on them and work on improving them. After all, God wouldn’t 74

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have given you the gift if he didn’t want you to use it. What influences do you bring to being a pastor? I love to read - which is funny to say now as at school I hated it. I struggled for years, but now I have come to see that there is a wealth of knowledge to be gained from the journeys of others. I find myself with a constant stack by my bed, my mind and heart being shaped and moulded by giants of the faith, great minds who are prepared to work with due diligence to help navigate us through a complex world. You will often find me on my day off listening to podcasts - I find myself inspired by people’s stories. This is probably, at least in part, what encouraged me to host our Hillsong Creative Podcast which we started in 2018. It’s been so great learning from all the people I have the privilege of interviewing each week. I take this learning into the breadth of life and pastoring. I was also fortunate in my teenage years to have some incredible mentors who took time to invest in my spiritual formation - people who asked the hard questions, challenged me to better understand scripture and pushed me to believe God in every season of life. Brian and Bobbie Houston have also been an incredible example to me, both before we came to Hillsong Church and whilst we have been here. They have an incredible ability to see everything in light of the Kingdom and a love for the Church that I had never experienced before coming here. I have learned to see the Church not necessarily as perfect, but beautiful and truly

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as part of God’s rescue plan for humanity. Also, my Mum and Dad have had the greatest influence in my life. They raised me to love God, to put him first and to never give up. My Dad was a faithful man and even though he passed away this year, his influence in my life lives on. When I think of him I’m reminded of what it takes to make it to the end, to keep your marriage intact, to have your kids loving you and your faith in God immoveable. I know that they are the things that matter most and this helps me keep a good perspective for myself and for those that I pastor. You had the privilege to have some great mentors, leaders and examples. One being your father and how he showed by example to have a great marriage. I know many people struggle with having and finding those mentors, those influences that can shape their lives. Can you give some advice on how to find a mentor? Not all mentors have to be found in a one to one setting. From that perspective it’s probably easier than ever before to find great examples of Godly men and woman who can bring wisdom into your life. With podcasts and online courses and all the content that is freely available online, there’s no shortage of places to learn from and to grow. We can get wisdom literally from all over the world. So being mentored can happen and is available, all it takes is a keen eye and an open heart. What have your failures taught you? My failures have taught me to see God at work orchestrating my whole life for his glory. I remember running a business through a season where we were in transition, I just needed to provide for Cass and our two kids, so I did what I needed to do in order to pay the mortgage and the bills. I wouldn’t say that I was a failure in that season, but I definitely felt like I was a long way from “the dream” I had in my heart. It was a humbling season and one that took long hours for little reward. However, I watched the Lord lead our lives, gently teaching and helping me to examine what I wanted, what my gifts are and where I could contribute to the church. I ended up closing the business to go back to university to study my masters in theology. Through this season I realised I had learned to trust more, take greater risks, understanding that life is long and nothing is final in God.

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What you said was really powerful that most dreamers and creatives struggle with. You needed to provide and pay the bills and ran a business you probably were not most passionate about. Can you give some advice and encouragement to people who have big creative dreams and have to work jobs they probably don’t enjoy to provide for themselves and pay the bills? For most of us, by the grace of God, life is long. We have plenty of time to do the things we have in our heart to do. So from that perspective, my advice would be to relax, and allow God to work on you while you do work you may not like that much. Over time it’s amazing how just being faithful pays off. And God is good at using all the things in our lives to his glory and our benefit. So be patient and stay diligent and eventually it will all come together. How do you stay motivated? Over the years I’ve had times of intense motivation and then other times of not wanting to get up and go to work in the morning. The truth is, no one is 100% motivated all of the time. We all have times of being more or less motivated. It seems we’re all more likely to live consistently motivated lives if we’re doing what we 100% believe we’re called to do. This all made sense for me when I decided to go back to the word of God and study what it means to be “called”. The result of my study was that I found, broadly speaking, that God calls and we respond. Calling is more about following Him than it is about our vocation or even where we find ourselves. Take the disciples as an example. Jesus called them to follow him, they then dropped

what they were doing and followed. Their vocation was secondary to their following of him. They were fishermen, then they became followers. They outworked this “call” as they followed Him and they devoted their lives to that call. The same is true for us, Jesus calls and we follow. We out work this following, this call, where ever and what ever we’re “doing”. Over the years this helped me realise that no matter what I’m doing, I’m called, whether what I’m doing seems to have value or not, I’m called of God and I can live this calling fully right where I am. What challenges do you face as global creative pastor? Cass and I have an incredible team that all work together to pastor and lead Hillsong creative. She runs the global side of what we do and I oversee our Australian team. Working together has been super fun over the years, but it hasn’t come without its challenges - we’re quite different in personality and how we approach things, but our strengths and weaknesses are the perfect compliment to each other so when we get it right it works like a dream. We’ve experienced the joy and stretch of expansion across our Church as our team is predominately made up of volunteers. Inspiring, leading and pastoring across locations, cities, countries (let alone time zones) and cultures can also prove challenging, but we meet with our location creative pastors face to face each year straight after our worship conference in Sydney - this has truly been a gift to us all in building relationship and communicating more effectively. We live a fast pace life, jam packed with adventure and I’m glad to have the privilege of playing a small part in all God’s doing through Hillsong Church.

“My failures have taught me to see God at work orchestrating my whole life for his glory”

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Marriage is never easy. At times there can be competition in pursuit of careers. Has their ever been any competition between you and Cass in the past? I love being married… Cass is the best and she makes life so good! We’re best friends and it’s a dream to be able to work together to build the kingdom. (I just re-read that, it’s sounds too good to be true, but it really is!!). Having said that, I’m not saying that we don’t have times of disagreement or even misunderstanding, we do, but we’re both committed to each other and all God has for the other person. We know each other’s strengths and weaknesses and we’ve had to make conscious decisions to champion each other and encourage each other instead of seeing the other person as competition. God has great plans for us together and for each of us as individuals and we both have to trust Him for what he has for us both. How has being a pastor changed you and what has that taught you over the course of your life? I remember a year where my heart was shattered into a million pieces. Our team experienced the loss of a number of members including more than a few babies. As we hit late December I remember sitting on the floor of our bathroom in floods tears, my heart so heavy for our people who had endured much loss and pain that year. As Cass and I looked at each other I recall saying “who would willingly choose this”. But we chose to follow Jesus into a 80

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life of pastoring - and we continue to choose - counting it an honour that people would let us into some of the darkest and most beautiful spaces of their lives, seeking to honour God through it all. Around that time I was reading about the appointment of Aaron and the priestly garments that he wore in Exodus. He was told to engrave stones on his shoulders with the names of the 12 tribes of Israel on them and also to put stones across his heart on the breast plate with the names on it. As I read I felt the Holy Spirit start to form my own understanding of how I was to approach pastoring - by knowing the names of our people (where they are from, the lives they live, and who they are), and carrying the weight of responsibility for them on my shoulders. And also carrying them in my heart, loving them and the situations that they find them self in, with grace, prayerful and humble. I used to think pastoring was just a platform role - the teaching that shapes community and the faithful preaching of Gods word, and whilst I value that part of pastoring, I have come to realise that pastoring also happens one on one, and in small groups, over coffees, in peoples work places, on the sidelines and in the shadows. It’s being with people though the best and worst of times. It happens often when it isn’t glamorous or or even seen, but where faith and doubt collide. It’s where people trust you enough to share what they are going through and where you stand shoulder to shoulder with them in the grit and dirt and mess, through the trial and the triumph.

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â&#x20AC;&#x153;I used to think pastoring was just a platform role - the teaching that shapes community and the faithful preaching of Gods word, and whilst I value that part of pastoring, I have come to realise that pastoring also happens one on oneâ&#x20AC;?

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That’s interesting that you say that. Most people see pastors on a platform preaching and that’s their encompassing idea of a pastor but like you mentioned, pastoring is one on one, shepherding people and doing a lot of this in the unseen. Can you talk about the work in the unseen? I think a lot of people, especially in this generation want success fast and struggle being in the unseen and working pastorally and creatively but perhaps not seeing the fruit of it. I wonder if this a question of perspective. The reality is that all of life is seen by God. He sees our highs and lows, He sees our triumphs and failures. God is with us, directing and guiding us whether we are on a platform or not. Nothing goes unseen and no good work is without fruit of some sort, at some time. We may not see the fruit immediately or receive applause for the effort, but with the right perspective we can know that our Father in Heaven sees it all. In some way, our living out His will brings Him joy and glory. With this kind of thinking we can do what others wouldn’t do and have an impact that others may not

see, but that will resonate across eternity. What encouraging advice would you give to struggling artists or those pursuing the arts full time? My encouragement to those wanting to pursue the arts full time would be; Trust God, work hard and don’t give up. This is simple, but really difficult to actually do. It seems to me that most people would love to earn a living from their art miss one or more of these three things. They either trust more in themselves than God, or they don’t work hard enough, or they give up too soon. So, if it’s in your heart to do, and you believe God would have you do it, then trust Him in it, work harder than you think you can, and never give up!I put so much pressure to live up to the expectations of others. All these different voices and opinions distracted me from listening to the voice that actually truly mattered. There is so much freedom in knowing whose voice to listen to and whose opinion matters most in your life. This is definitely an ongoing journey but I’m definitely making progress.

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From South Africa to London, Jungle Boi is turning out must listen tunes

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Photography courtesy of Jungle Boi

Written by Hayet Gessese

BOI

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ait Masuku, AKA Jungleboi is trailblazing on a much crowded music scene with sleek production and outstanding vocal features from rising artists. Jungleboi’s musical roots as a producer go beyond the UK and England and tie back to his native South Africa where he was born and raised before moving to the UK. Jungleboi’s pop ballads transcend past the monotonous top 40 hits we hear today with production that glides over each lyric so seamlessly and effortlessly produced, Mark Ronson may want to take a few notes. Jungleboi currently lives in London with his wife and daughter where they attend church at Hillsong London. Jungleboi’s patience, vision for excellence, character and his heart for people propel him to where few people go in a music industry that can easily tear down musicians. Nait, thanks for the interview. Pleasure having you in the magazine. Softball question. What was the first record you purchased? Boy I can’t say I remember. Growing up with Christian music and Christian parents... probably DC Talk, Jesus Freak. We have to ask, where did the blonde dreads come from? The dreads have been with me for 19 years this June, the blonde joined the party a couple years ago after realizing that the color wasn’t associated with intelligence or lack of, anymore. FAITH FOLLOWS

For people who don’t know you, you’re a lovable, funny guy. Where did that personality come from? My dad’s quite the joker, always pranking and making people laugh. Guess I took that on. You had a big 2018 and released some great tracks. Can you talk about your season 1, your collaborations and the music you released? First song I released was light beam with a good friend and super talented artist Aalok Bala. It was great because I had been postponing to put out my music and she and Nick just said ‘hey let’s do a record now and put it out next week.’ And so we did a record that quick even though it ended taking another couple months or so before I could actually release. But that set it all in motion. Sinner’s Suicide with Dom Mc Allister was next. He’s a London based artist with an amazing voice. That sat well with audiences worldwide also spawning an acoustic version which went on to be even better received than the full version. Prisoner with Molly Kate Kestner who’s repped with Atlantic Records in the US. This girl has an amazing tone! These were such awesome records which again, were done with friends and have been very well received. Switching topics. What was it like growing up in South Africa and London?

SA was amazing and tough all together. I learned so much from its rich diverse culture. I walked out of it with five languages, a rich musical a dance heritage and of course a racism expert. London gave me an edge through the freedom of really exploring all types of musical genres and fashion styles with no bars held. London being one of the world’s capitals also opened my eyes and allowed me to rub shoulders with creative geniuses from all seven continents...perhaps six. I have yet to meet an Antarctican. How do you feel your South African heritage and UK upbringing play into your music? In SA I was exposed to African music with its unique rhythms and drum patterns. My pop was not the Beatles or Elvis. I didn’t know most of those songs until I was out of my teens. Having now experienced western pop music and classics, the combination and hybrid of both makes for a kaleidoscopic palette of sounds. I hear patterns and approach melodies in a very different way to my western counterparts. I now appreciate having grown up the way I did. What influences do you from, if any? I draw from so many sources. I love melodic songs, melancholic songs and anything alternative but yet still pop and easy to grasp. Anything that resonates with me will inspire me. It just has to move me in some way. I’m big on melody. I’m a fan of many songs around the world

“London gave me an edge through the freedom of really exploring all types of musical genres and fashion styles with no bars held.”

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“Melody is king, so goes my philosophy on songwriting. The lyrics are really dependent on who the artist is and what they’d like to talk about”

in languages I do not understand. But I understand and appreciate the melodic sense against the chords. That’s powerful. What’s your approach to writing and recording a track? Can you take us through the process? I tend to begin with the melodies. Once melodies have been formed over a good chord progression, they are then voice noted. These melodies often come outside the studio, meaning I have to whip my phone on a journey in the tube and record the melody whilst pretending to be on a phone call. Now all Londoners know that there’s no reception underground. So people at this point will usually give me weird looks. Once melodies are set, the lyrics are built to fit exactly into the melody, with no deviation whatsoever, melody is king, so goes my philosophy on songwriting. The lyrics are really dependent on who the artist is and what they’d like to talk about.

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You said melody is king and that the lyrics are dependent on the artist. Do you collaborate and help craft lyrics or do you work more as a hired hand? At what point do you come in to help craft the lyrics to produce the best message? I always collaborate on the lyrics too. If I focus on just the music, I’ll still keep a close ear on what the lyrics are saying. I do believe they are important too even though I favor the melody more. I think it’s always important to know what you’re tying to say in the song and to make sure whatever the message is comes across well and without too much to decipher How has your sound and music changed over the years? Yes it has changed a lot. I too believe in the evolution of sound and melodies within pop music. To stay “relevant” you have to evolve. the fundamentals and general structure remain. I study the sonics of our time and try to make sure my songs sound the same... only sonically not in terms of content and style and more so elements of what’s happening now in different songs. How do you stay relevant and true to artistic form? Is there room for compromise, if any? They should always be room for compromise. Especially

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within pop music. You’re aiming at a large audience pool. It’s all about having conversational songs about everyday relatable subjects in a new way. But you can’t be too precious about how different you want to be. The general public still has to get it. So there’s that compromise between overly artistic and the simplicity of song. So you mentioned you wrote for church. What was your experience writing for church? I had fun writing for church, it did feel very restrictive. I was writing for corporate worship and so it felt very ‘we and us,’ not as personal and conversational as I usually like my songs to be. But there’s a reason for that and in that context that’s what was needed. Would you write for church again? Yeah I would, but I’m happy writing outside of church too. I believe as long as I’m writing and making the best songs I can, it’s all for God’s glory whether it’s in church or not. Also more people are outside of the church than they are in it. So that’s where the “mission find” is for me. What do you want to accomplish as a producer and musician? What do you want to say through your music?

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“I see music as a soundtrack to people’s life stories. The music attaches itself to different memories and stages of our lives”

It’s not so much of a particular message I’d like to spread through my music. I’d love for it to reflect life. I see music as a soundtrack to people’s life stories. The music attaches itself to different memories and stages of our lives. Ultimately its more of a platform I’m building. With this platform there’s a lot I’d like to tackle, from social justice issues to philosophy. Authenticity is something we all crave. How do you stay true to yourself in an industry like music? Sometimes we do really weird things in a quest for authenticity, believing it has to be something no one has ever done. I believe in beginning with the blueprints some of the greats have left behind and then molding that into your own. Even if you to replicate what they did it could never be the same. Your DNA is unique, so what you do will always mix with your uniqueness and can never be an exact copy of something else. What’s your biggest challenge when it comes to creativity? Creativity doesn’t doesn’t always flow, like it dries up. So i’ve learned to store it up in times of excess. Even if it’s small ideas I record and don’t finish them. In the dry seasons I can come back to them and keep working from strong ideas rather than wrecking my brain and creating mediocre songs because my ideas are not great. The other challenge is that creativity is so personal. So when people don’t like your work, it’s easy to believe they don’t like you. But that’s not the case.

I have to remind myself that everyday when I get some form of rejection. I love that you mentioned rejection. What was it like starting out in such a competitive field like the UK? It was very hard. People never understood why I’d venture into such a competitive career path. They recite all types of stats and give me reasons why I shouldn’t go for it. I’d always say, ‘yes even if that’s what the stats say what makes you think I won’t be in that percentage?’ I did end up surrounding myself with people who really believe in me and that was enough. What do you want to say to those pursuing music, whether it be producing, songwriting or as a musical artist? Firstly know the basics, i.e play the piano or guitar or be a great singer. Pursue it relentlessly, I find the more times it’s people who keep going that make it rather than the most talented ones. Use all the resources we have now. Find people that are are more successful than you and hang around them. What are you excited about this year? I’m excited about some of my releases this year! I have some collaborations with exciting artists that I’d love to share but should probably wait.

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HOPELE

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ESS

Written by Hayet Gessese Photography by Carlos Solorzano, Hayet Gessese & Caleb George Sometimes our most dire circumstancees place us exactly where we need to be

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I remember sitting in the driver seat of my Scion XB. I was waiting for my friend Leon to arrive to drop off something I needed that night. I sat there wondering how I got to this point. It was late, maybe 8 or 9pm and I was parked on Forest Lawn Drive, near Gate 8 at the Warner Bros. Studio Lot. Leon arrived some time later and after he handed me the keys he asked where I was going to stay. “I don’t know” I replied. “Somewhere in Hollywood.” We exchanged goodbyes and shortly after I was left alone to my own devices. I wasn’t able to see the irony of the situation then. All I wanted was to succeed in Hollywood. Make a name for myself as a writer and director whose films would change lives. It wasn’t just a vain dream, I actually wanted to change people. And there I was, a defeated idealist sitting outside a studio that represented the very establishment I so desperately wanted to be a part of. I was locked out of achieving my own dream. I drove off and arrived parked on the fifth floor of my job. I reached for the pillow from the backseat and tucked it under my head to try and get in a comfortable position. No matter which way I turned, there was no comfort. And that was the disposition of the situation I was in. No matter which way I turned, I was hoping for a way out, but no opportunities presented itself. I would like to tell you that I was introspective and asked God “How I got here” but I don’t recall doing that. I accepted the position I was in. I was young, ambitious, full of talent and I was homeless in Hollywood. We all have dreams within us. FAITH FOLLOWS

We all can recount the dreams we had as children. The dreams that carried on from our childhood could have well formed the basis of what we wanted to be when we grew up. They’re beautiful dreams, some are God given and some are driven by selfish desire. Regardless of the nature of the ambition, we all have the innate desire to accomplish what we set out in our hearts to do. It’s in our human nature to go after what we believe we can do. I sat in a room packed with fellow graduates in December 2013 full of hope and the desire to change the world. I was ready to give it my all. Freshly graduated and on the scene, I wanted to do something but I knew I needed a job. So I applied and applied and applied. Six months rolled by and my inspiration turned into desperation. The money I had was slowly running out and I needed to work, anywhere. I submitted my application to a movie theater and after a laborious interview process, I had the job. Fast forward four months later and I was sleeping in my car. I wasn’t homeless by choice, but rather was the benefactor of unfortunate circumstances and roommate prospects that never panned out for various reasons. Despite the situation, my faith never wavered but I was slowly being broken. The sleepless nights, cold peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for breakfast and the lies I told my friends where I lived took their toll on my faltering mind. The job I was once grateful for became a place I despised. The glamor of working at a movie theater faded and cleaning theaters and serving popcorn became

laborious tasks I loathed. This wasn’t the Hollywood dream I envisioned. How do we stay positive in a situation that seems damning? As creatives, how do we cope with the fact that we’re not in a position or place we thought we should be in our careers? Perhaps you find yourself in a job that isn’t the exact trajectory you want to head in and you’re asking God if this is it? Maybe you spent years in the same place and are still clutching onto a dream that you thought would come true but now you don’t see a way out. You’re unhappy clocking in and clocking out of a job that you need to survive and pay the bills. I would be a fool to say I had an answer but it wouldn’t be far off to say it’s not about you. That might sound insensitive and surprising but remember when I said if the dream you had was God given or out of selfish desire? Surprisingly, the common denominator of dreams is about helping people. Once we make it about us, we become consumed in a world that involves self and not others. When we become self-focused and the dream is about when ‘our time will come or when success will come our way,’ we lose sight of what the dream was really about. If you’re reading this and you find yourself in a season where you don’t want to be but know that God has more for your life, be still. I believe God has you exactly where He wants you to be. Maybe you’re reading this and you don’t believe in God, that’s totally fine. Just remember that this is a character molding season and you’re becoming the ideal person you were created to be.

“The common denominator of dreams is about helping people. Once we make it about us, we become consumed in a world that involves self and not others”

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“If we allow ourselves to be molded by the journey, we can help those with the dreams that we’ve been given.”

God uses molding seasons like the one I was in and the one that you’re in now to craft His goodness into you so that you become who you were called to be, not on your own time, but on His time. Last summer I visited one of the streets next to a park where I would normally sleep in my car. It had been four years since I found myself in that position. Being homeless gave me perspective, yet I was doing it out the comfort of my own car. I can’t imagine what it would have been like to be on the streets and face the same situation. But what I can tell you is that being in that place, it was only just a season. It was a period of my life that I don’ t miss or would want to do again, but I appreciate that I had had that experience because it has made me the man God wanted me to become. Maybe you’re in a season that’s excruciating, painful and you want it to end. That’s the journey of the artist. It’s the path least taken and requires the most resolve. This is a defining moment in your life that can shape you into the person you were called to be. Four years later I don’t have the same ambitions or dreams I did when I was homeless and hopeless in Hollywood. They’ve been repurposed and rebranded by God. My selfish desires to be the next big thing have turned into telling stories in many mediums, including this magazine, something I could have never imagined I would be doing. But I guess that’s what God’s dreams are, they’re God given, and if we allow ourselves to be molded by the journey, we can help those with the dreams that we’ve been given to tell stories that will change lives forever. FAITH FOLLOWS

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[ACT] III Monday Monday 108 | Mariah 120 | Jessie 132 | Caitlin 142 | Why Art Matters 148

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MONDAY O N D A Y

Best friends make the best business partners and these two entrepreneurs are changing the events game

Written by Hayet Gessese Photography by Hayet Gessese

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t’s Saturday morning and the Monday Monday team has t-minus two and half hours to get to the venue. The event: a baby shower for their first client. They have to impress, they have to be on time and they have to deliver. “We need the balloons that we’re getting at Base Warehouse. What else is on the list” Alondra asks. She walks over to the balcony. “Is it raining?” she asks rhetorically. The rain is just one of the many hurdles the Monday Monday team has to endure before they get to their destination. Cuppy and Alondra walk in the rain to Base Warehouse to grab the final assembling materials for their very first balloon arch. It’s 8am and

the girls are already facing major dilemmas. Cuppy has no cell service and Alondra has less than 10% battery on her phone. They miss their bus to Maroubra beach due to a lack of cell service. At this stage, the Monday Monday team has no money to order an UBER. With an hour and a half to go before the event, they wait patiently at the bus stop in hopes of getting on the right bus and getting off at the right stop. They successfully take one bus and get off to wait for their next transfer. In laughing fashion while they wait, they watch as very the bus they need to get on passes right before their eyes. “At this point we thought weren’t going to make the event” Cuppy recalls. With

Alondra’s

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battery they order an UBER with the money they don’t have as a last minute resort. They eventually spot the UBER driver and as he turns to pick them up, the bus they had been waiting for all along shows up. Alondra and Cuppy quickly get on the bus to avoid the rain. After a disastrous morning and many close calls, they finally arrive with thirty minutes to spare and create their very first balloon arch. Cuppy Flores and Alondra Olivas are the duo behind the company Monday Monday that specializes in grazing boards, balloon arches, photo walls, event hosting and baked goods; a one stop shop when it comes to events of any size. The two formed a partnership in 2018, having known each other for over five years and being from the FAITH FOLLOWS

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same hometown of Tucson, Arizona. They were able to purchase their supplies with a $100 loan from their friend of five years and flatmate of two years, Alan Adjei (a fellow Arizonian and classmate at Hillsong College). The two tow a unique partnership, Cuppy handles more of the day to day operations and business while both equally share in the creativity of the company. I enjoyed a first hand experience to the formation of the company as I lived with Cuppy and Alondra during my first year at Hillsong College in Sydney, Australia. Like most success stories, the origin of this one started off with more than modest means. The business operated out of a linen closet and used two shelve spaces, 114

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one to store fabrics and the other to store their accessories. Under the shelve spaces were drawers full of balloons, photo wall items, streamers, various party décor and of course, scissors. The duo now operates out of Cuppy’s apartment whom she lives in with her husband Rudy. The closet space is larger and it seems as if the business out grew its modest two shelf spaces. By the product these two are delivering, you wouldn’t be able to tell that this is company is still in it’s infancy and barely a year old. This is very much the beginning for Monday Monday.

alloween 2018, Sydney, Australia: It’s the week of the eerie holiday and Alondra

has taken it to herself create Halloween cookies for a small get together; a holiday Cuppy and Alondra deeply cherish. Alondra spends countless hours making dough and more hours on end getting the exact coloring and squeeze technique to make a frosted cookie. Traditionally one could easily go to the grocery store and purchase cookies like the ones Alondra was laboring over, but that would be all too easy for a woman that strives for excellence. The cookies take hours to dry and Alondra continues to make batch after batch until the right bat shape is formed, until the half moon is perfectly carved and the shape of a pumpkin is perfectly represented in cookie form. Days later no one will know the efforts that

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went into each cookie at the small Halloween get together Cuppy and Alondra throw at our apartment. But that’s the quality that Alondra brings to her Monday Monday partnership. In the unseen hours, precious time goes into even the most minuet details, many that some would overlook but it’s this love for the craft that distinguishes most companies and that of Monday Monday. It’s more than a business, it’s an expression of love through arts and crafts to create the best event. The events side of the company is just one aspect of their many business ventures together. “Cards” Cuppy replies. Planning events is just the gateway to their real dream: stationary. Stationary may seem ordinary, especially when only purchased on certain occasions but in

Monday Monday fashion, it represents more. “My preferred method for documenting anything has always been a notebook and pen. I however, am very particular when it comes to the type of paper I write on, the size of the notebook and how it feels under my hand. I started to wish that stationary companies would change certain things or add things to their current products. I couldn’t be the only one to want that perfect notebook, pen or card” Alondra recalls. “Why couldn’t I be the one to make that happen? Why couldn’t I help make stationary an expression of the individual and create something that someone has always hoped for?”

“It’s more than a business, it’s an expression of love through arts and crafts to create the best event”

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when clients are sparse and ugust 23, 2018. A business is slow, or in Alondra mysterious box arrives to be and Cuppy’s case, starting picked up downstairs. I take a business from a shared the elevator down to the mail passion while attending bible room and retrieve the box. college full time and not It’s a small box wrapped in being able to find a part time black plastic. From the looks job to pay for living expenses of it, it seems like it came a and tuition. long way. I walk back into the apartment and yell out “We took a risk in beginning to Cuppy and Alondra that a business with nothing! there’s a box here for them. Most people may laugh and During this time it’s a bit say it’s illogical. If there is tense in the apartment. Less something we learned from than a month into the new living in Australia, it’s that semester, we all have no idea God makes something out of how we are going to pay for nothing and it wouldn’t be our semester fees at Hillsong any different with our small College, but we’re faithful business” Cuppy recalls. and determined that God “There are many ingredients is going to provide a way. to a business like finances, Despite facing uncertainty, work space, right timing etc. both Cuppy and Alondra stay But, before you add any of occupied with creating new that into the mixture you photo walls and ideating new need FAITH.” party designs and balloon arches. It’s a testimony I lay the box on the table about the dedication these and Rudy begins to open the two have amidst adversity to box with Cuppy. “Shutup!” stay faithful to a dream even Cuppy exclaims. I silently when the present situation record the whole process on seems challenging. It’s times the other side of the couch like these that new business on my phone which I later ventures dissipate and use to recall this event. “No disband or buckle down even freaking way. This is so cool” 118

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Cuppy exclaims. “Freaking genius, try it on. Try it on something” Alondra tells Cuppy. In typical Alondra and Cuppy fashion, they FaceTime their pastors Tony and Angelica Bravo to thank them for the balloon pump they desperately needed. Before being gifted the pump, Alondra and Cuppy blew each of their balloons by mouth, including the balloon arch at their first event and sparingly used helium to save costs. Their humility and graciousness for this gift point to the testimony of their character. They eventually get off the phone and start creating balloons with much ease and begin to plan new ideas and balloon arches for events. What started off as a $100 loan from our flat mate Alan turned into something more. Their partnership goes beyond a business, it’s a friendship formed from a bond of trust, many memories together and their love for Jesus, a bond that indeed, is unbreakable.

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MAR Written by Mariah Holden Photography by Hayet Gessese

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To Mariah, poetry is a game of two: God, self and the expression of divine revelation

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Why Poetry? By Mariah Holden Words that tick tack taste in your mouth Math is for the kids in school who like straight lines and clearly defined boxes Poetry is for the kid who asks â&#x20AC;&#x153;what is a line?â&#x20AC;? Imagine a sky Period. Now you wonder... Is the sky blue? What kind of blue? Poetry paints your imagination colorful The sky was dark, yet warm Like bonfires and summer kisses Can you see it? Words illuminating sound and motion Art and commotion Rattling in your brain Page by page Like a comic book you flip And grip emotion in one hand Curiosity in the other What clay creation can I concoct from this tapestry of infinite vocabulary? Poetry is like a puzzle with infinite pieces You never quite arrive 122

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Yet you need it to survive It’s the love song The guitar strums in a summer breeze The evening hug and autumn leaves Imagine dirt and unfriendly water Mud slopping and your stuck Hopelessly slipping Gripping nothing but air Poetry is the rope that you grab onto to pull you out of the tangled mess that is your mind You take each thought like thread And you begin to weave it on the page Staged emotions instructed to act as you please But the words are alive and have minds of their own So they will perform in your brain In the most interpretative, creative way ______________

“Why Poetry?” is my attempt to express how words, writing and poetry can give us something solid to eat and digest. Our emotions and our experiences are really like floating clouds; elusive. Poetry is like a containment chamber that allows us to study the clouds and make sense of them. It’s taking the wispy and formless thing and giving it meaning and purpose. My journey with writing really began when I was a high school student. We read Tim O’Brien’s “The Things They Carried,” a memoir about the personal challenges of being a soldier in the Vietnam War. The soldiers didn’t merely carry war equipment, but a personal sense of loss, guilt, regret and so forth. As students, we were challenged to write about what we carried... an insecurity, a secret depression, a sense of failure. I wrote about my hair. One of my earliest memories of realizing my blackness, was when I balled my tiny fist, defying and cursing my mother. “Why did you make my hair like this!?” I remember saying. “If you just left it alone!” Even as a four year old, I was far too acquainted with the

“Poetry is like a containment chamber that allows us to study the clouds and make sense of them. It’s taking the wispy and formless thing and giving it meaning and purpose”

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“Writing... poetry, are the bandaids and scalpels; the magnifying glass and incision needle. God’s gift to heal the hurting”

many hands in my hair that tried desperately to make it “neat” or “presentable.” If it wasn’t my daddy’s strong willed brush, it was the neighbor lady’s Palmolive dish soap and fine toothed comb. People had always treated my hair like a problem to be solved, so why wouldn’t I? As a 16 year old with a perm and a weave, I confessed in written words that my hair was the thing I carried and that it wouldn’t be a weight I would put down until I loved it for what it was. Kinky, classic and completely original. That essay was the most exposing and honest I had ever been when it came to putting pen to paper. I had written essays and even poetry prior to that assignment, but that was perhaps the first time I had ever written. Because that’s what writing is right? Honest. If you don’t faithfully try to draw the way the sky looks in the audience’s mind you’re a lazy liar. That’s why we adore the Psalms right? I think God wants us to be shocked by honesty. We need good writers, but beyond that we need truth tellers - men and women who will allow us to hurt and to celebrate, to dance and to grieve. What would life be without the solid rope to pull us from the mirk and mire of depression and insecurity. That essay was like healing oil. And isn’t it just like God to desire wholeness for his children? Wholeness can only happen when we acknowledge hurt. Writing... poetry, are the bandaids and scalpels; the magnifying glass and incision needle. God’s gift to heal the hurting. I suppose that’s why I love it. It’s communication documented. From a person to a person. From yourself to yourself. From God to you. From you to God. It’s dancing spelled out. Words are the rhythm and language we use to express and define life and experiences. A life without writing is cheap and colorless. FAITH FOLLOWS

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A MOMENT WITH

Jessie Swinford

Art and creativity has played a key role in shaping who I am from a very young age. I used to think that what I ‘did’ made me who I am, and that the art I created somehow formed part of my personhood. Which in part I think is true, but it was always the Creator’s artistry that was marking my life. Once I recognized that, I was able to create from such a place of authenticity, knowing WHO I found my identity in and reflecting that through all that I created. Hi, my name is Jessie (yes that is my full name) and I am 19 years old. I am a dancer and I have worn many other creative hats or ‘titles’; but most importantly I am a daughter, created by the ultimate Artisan, purposed to reveal Him in all that I do and all that I create. A bit of back story… I was born and experienced my early childhood years in South Africa and I am extremely proud of those roots. I then moved to the Sunshine Coast, Australia and had many of my formative years in that little beach town, which are filled with memories 132

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and adventure. I am currently living in Sydney, Australia and have been falling more in love with this city day by day. I was blessed enough to have taken up dancing at the age of three, as well as having the freedom to put my hand to an eclectic range of art forms such as music, acting, painting, photography and in more recent years, writing. I have a deep passion for creative expression as a whole; appreciating that different people can bring something so unique through their own avenue of gifts. I can’t quite put my finger on what it was that kick started my beautiful and imperfect journey with dance. I like to think that there was a predesigned pull within my soul that drew me toward the wonderful world of expression through movement. I owe a lot of my flourishing within dance to my superwoman of a mom. She made so many sacrifices of time, money, energy and simple support for me to do what I loved most. From early morning drives to competitions to late night rehearsals and all the inbetweens (sewing point shoe ribbons between shows) she truly made my

passions a possibility. I believe that my family has had a major influence on my art and the way that I create. They are far from perfect, but they hold this beauty and rawness within the way that we persistently love each other through everything. I try to let that flow into my creativity, aiming to bring something that has a raw authentic beauty, something real that can leave a lasting impact on people or help them to see the world from a new angle. I am determined to create things that I am proud of, things of meaning that express my soul and draw others home. What drives me to create is the hope that in some way people may see a glimpse of the Divine Creator; that I might open a window to heaven for someone to peer in and see His goodness and truth. I think that is the one thing that keeps me motivated through every season of busyness and grind, within the tension of balancing multiple creative disciplines as well as being a full time student. I no longer create for myself or for the simple sake

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“It’s not about trying to create something perfect, it is about creating something REAL”

of creating; I am committed to the people on the other side of my art, that they may benefit from what is being uncovered or communicated through my expression. A mountain that I have always had to overcome within my art has been insecurity and perfectionism (said every creative ever). I know that this is not an uncommon obstacle among creatives, we all feel like we aren’t good enough or that we can’t quite live up to the dreams that we have. That being said, a revelation that has changed my perspective entirely is that it’s not actually about being ‘good enough’ or living up to your own, or other people’s standards. It’s not about trying to create something perfect, it is about creating something REAL. Something original, and meaningful. That is what all artists are unknowingly striving towards, the pursuit of drawing purpose, expression and beauty out of this wonderfully chaotic world. There is inspiration lying in every walk you take down the same old street, 134

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in each person that you meet and within the seemingly mundane. As artisans, it is our job to open our eyes, to see the wonder and magnify the beauty and truth which others cannot yet see. It is our mandate to inspire with the things that we create. So with these things in your focus, insecurities and self scrutiny just has to take the back seat because what we get the privilege of doing is far greater than ourselves.

joy and freedom, it is truly a gift to be able to get lost in the movement and music. It has helped me manage stress and has been a coping strategy through many hard seasons of my life. I like to think that God gave dance to me as both a blessing and a weapon against things that I would face in life. I am completely grateful for the way that I get to create and ultimately glorify God with the gifts that He has entrusted to me.

Dance has most definitely changed the way that I approach life. The discipline required to master this craft is testing to both your body and your mind. It has taken me to new heights of what I believe I can do and achieve. It pushes me to my limits it has made me truly appreciate how incredible the human body really is. It has given me the mental capacity to push past walls in every area of my life, bringing me to the realization that with a certain measure of tenacity, you can accomplish almost anything. Dance has also brought me an indescribable

So I would encourage you as a creative (if you were wondering, yes, you are, everyone is creative), be brave, challenge and push yourself to new places, work towards excellence but don’t settle for perfection. There is far more depths to your art within the flaws and cracks. You have the power to tell stories that matter, to reflect and magnify your Creator and to INSPIRE those around you. I pray that you would push past every mindset of limitation and that you would fearlessly create in the light of the purpose that has been placed on your life.

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â&#x20AC;&#x153;There is inspiration lying in every walk you take down the same old street, in each person that you meet and within the seemingly mundane. As artisans, it is our job to open our eyes, to see the wonder and magnify the beauty and truth which others cannot yet seeâ&#x20AC;?

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Acting With

Caitlin Lopez

Written by Hayet Gessese Photography by Various Artists

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aitlin Lopez knows a thing or two about perseverance. Being a Christian actress in a competitive field in Sydney where the talent pool is vast and the opportunities are slim presents its challenges; but Caitlin’s faith and resilience help her hold on. Caitlin has starred in a number of films and has played leading roles in theater and despite the success, Caitlin stays motivated and unwilling to compromise her faith and values. How do you stay motivated in this arena that is the acting world? In order to be a motivated actor, you must always be educating yourself. The world is your classroom and people are your inspiration. It’s easy to feel discouraged and exhausted in the acting world, especially because the no’ usually outweigh the yes.’ The way that I stay motivated is actually through these six things: reading, acting, psychology books, watching films and TV shows and documentaries, teaching drama to kids and teens, partaking in acting courses and collaborating with likeminded creatives. There’s an ethereal sense when acting. A place of liberation and freedom. What is it about acting that draws you in?

Oh man that’s a good question… There is a sense of peace and contentment when I am acting. It’s that feeling of you know, that you know, that you know THIS is what you have been called to do. I love the excitement and wonder that is involved when I am on set or on the stage. You get to play all of these different characters, jump back in time or into the future and portray all these different stories, there’s truly nothing like it. When I am acting, I know that there is someone on the receiving end being impacted by the story in some way. That’s what draws me in, knowing that I have the opportunity to impact someone. I always say that if at least one person walks away from the story with more passion, hope, excitement and confidence or just something real, then I have done my job right. Acting can be a bit of a duality between character and self. How do you separate the two? Whenever I get a role, I read the script and then I read it again and again and again to understand the character and find the clues that make the character who they are. I love the concept of putting yourself in someone else’s shoes. So that’s what I tend to do so that I can understand how I would genuinely react, if I found myself in that same situation.

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Now sometimes I’ll find that I’m actually quite similar to the character I am portraying and I can draw upon that and other times I find that I am nothing like my character but I may have been in similar circumstances or know of someone in my life that reminds me of the character… or I just use my imagination. Regardless, you are spending so much time creating and being this character and sometimes if you’re not careful, you can get too carried away. So I tend to approach my character development process in a very organic way by doing all of the research, script analysis and studies beforehand. Once I get on set or stage, I let it go and go with the flow of the scene and atmosphere so that the reactions are realistic. Once the director calls cut, I snap out of the character and leave it there. Whether acting for stage or on film, the competition is unmerited. How do you deal with the harsh reality of a career in acting given the success rate? Oh trust me I have felt like throwing in the towel so many times because of how challenging, unstable and unpromising the acting world is. I can recall the tears, the confusion and lots and lots of empty ice-cream containers! But passion is a funny thing because it turns the challenging, unstable and unpromising into an inspiring, exciting and determined journey. You definitely 144

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need to be honest with yourself and say “yeah this is tough, but so am I.” Once you’ve found your passion, you just can’t give up on it. You’ve just got to take a deep breath, keep working hard, be kind to yourself and stay motivated. Even if I don’t ‘make it’ my journey is still a success because at least I gave it a shot or realistically in acting terms at least I gave it ten thousand shots! Do you have a seminal acting memory? Get ready for a long story! In 2014 I was in my second year of film school at Screenwise and it was probably one of the toughest years I’ve experienced. I was trying to pay off my educational loan, as well as studying full time, youth leading and working two jobs. Rest was a faint memory, my hope was fading and I started to think “Can I actually do this?” A friend of mine messages me and says “Hey Caitlin, were you at Team Night tonight?” Team night is a night especially dedicated for all creatives at Hillsong Church. And of course my reply was “No, I was at work, how come?” He then passes on an email saying that a team of people wanted to create a database for actors and that I should send my material to them. So I thought, why not? So I sent my material off and later that week they asked me to come in and audition.

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I had no idea what the role was for but I prepared a monologue from Sandra Bullock’s character in While You Were Sleeping (who is one of my favorite actresses). At the audition they mentioned that the role was for an opener for Hillsong Colour Conference. A few days later I received an email stating that they wanted me to be their leading lady. When I arrived on set it was this beautiful big green screen studio. I had so many emotions and thoughts running through my mind, one was absolute fear, the other excitement and also relief since one week prior I had just learned how to work with a green screen. This short film was about the “Prodigal Son” but of course “Prodigal Daughter” in this case and it was set in the 1920’s Gatsby era. A few weeks passed and I was in an arena with thousands of women attending Hillsong’s Colour Conference… and my jaw dropped. I couldn’t believe that I was doing what I was doing. When I was up on that stage I felt as though the words “hold on” kept ringing in my ear and when I had women coming up to me afterwards in tears saying the film and acting impacted them and gave them hope, I knew (again) that acting was my calling. I had to just take a moment and realize what I had just been a part of, I shook my head, let out a massive breath and my heart that was once struggling

to believe that I had what it took to be an actor and was filled with such hope and determination. Faith often comes at the crossroads of hollywood and broadway. How have you held your faith in an industry as secular as acting without compromising your faith? “You will never make it in this industry if you don’t do that” is just one of the many things that has been said to me in my experiences of not compromising my faith. Those words can be like a slap in the face, but no one said being a Christian actress was going to be easy. I believe that my story and experiences have been one big character building journey and I wouldn’t have it any other way. Knowing your identity in God and understanding your values, morals and beliefs personally, has allowed me to stay true to myself. I won’t compromise because if I do, it’s like giving a part of myself away that I will never get back. It’s important to stand by what you believe in, because if you are easily swayed you will lose yourself, and I think that is one of the worst things that we can go through as humans, not knowing who we are or losing sight of who we are. FAITH FOLLOWS

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W H ART Y MATTERS Written by Hayet Gessese Art by Warhol, Da Vinci, Carravagio, Nolan & Michelangelo

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992. I was just a one-year-old when I was first introduced to a video that changed my life. For my birthday I received a VHS tape of a concert tour that took place from May to August of 1992. The band that toured that summer were a troupe of soldiers that entertained rebel forces during Ethiopia’s civil war and were a part of the revolution that toppled the communist military regime, Derg. The songs they sang were songs of freedom, liberation and of peace. I was captivated at the age of one by the band, the melodies, lights, the matching red and yellow tracksuits they all wore. It was from this VHS tape, now twenty-six years old that I learned what musical instruments were and what they looked and sounded like, the way stage lighting worked, and the general look and feel of live productions. This tape filled with African beats and melodies formed the basis of my appreciation and love for music, film and unknowingly began my dive into the world of artistry. It was a slow but steady twenty-six-year descent that ranged from creative writing to the saxophone, eventually songwriting, design, scriptwriting, film directing and preaching. Without this single VHS tape, the very fabric of my existence would be vastly different. I would’ve never discovered writing nor music and my interests in film would have been non-

existent. I re-count this story because at one point in our lives we all had that coming to Jesus moment with art. It’s a defining landmark, an event that changes the course of our lives entirely. But perhaps this process isn’t a slow burn, long winded journey for you much like it was for myself. Regardless of the path, we can all agree that art inspires art. Perhaps it wasn’t a VHS tape for you. Maybe your inspiration like thousands if not millions came from the artwork of the Renaissance era. Michelangelo’s Sistine Chapel in Vatican City or The Last Supper and Mona Lisa from DaVinci. Maybe it wasn’t fine art that drew you into this world. Maybe your descent into art came from prose and plays. We attribute the better portion of theater to the English poet and playwright, Shakespeare. He’s regarded as the most influential writer in the English language and the greatest dramatist that ever lived and it stands with reason that his body of work from plays like Romeo + Juliet, Hamlet, Macbeth and Julius Caesar defined the mastery of theater and undoubtedly inspired its audience. Phrases like “To be or not to be” and “Romeo, Romeo, where art thou Romeo” have become commonplace in literary English and popular culture. We can only imagine the countless number of artists inspired to create Shakespearean work in the centuries that followed. FAITH FOLLOWS

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“We all had that coming to Jesus moment with art. It’s a defining landmark, an event that changes the course of our lives entirely”

Writers who dream to pen a masterpiece stage play for Broadway or actors whose very existence is motivated by one-day reciting lines from classic playwrights and up and coming writers on big stages are influenced by something. Art has a way to captivate and enthrall us to dream for more. We intrinsically become inspired whether consciously or subconsciously to create what we have seen or heard through our own unique experience. It is through our own innate lives that our distinctive voices tell the stories of our art and in reverse, our art tells the story of our lives. Without these influences, there would be no starting point of reference for the artist. American film auteur director Martin Scorsese whose films depict crime and violence in urban environments often cites Federico Fellini as his inspiration and Fellini’s film 8 ½ as one of his favorite films ever made. Federico Fellini’s films were influenced by his life in 20th century Italy and often made use of baroque images, a movement popularized by Italian baroque painter Caravaggio. There’s almost a three hundred and fifty-year gap between Caravaggio and Scorsese, yet Scorsese became the benefactor of Caravaggio’s work and his unintentional artistic offspring. Art carries a magical influence that outlives its creator, even centuries after it’s original formation. In 1928 an animated short called Steamboat Willie from

the likes of obscure and relatively unknown illustrator Walt Disney became the first animated cartoon to have synchronized sound. After several attempts, Walt was propelled to further create more animated film classics like Snow White and The Seven Dwarfs and Pinocchio, which eventually lead to the creation of the empire we now associate as Disney. We can only imagine the millions of viewers who have seen Disney films and how they have shaped many children. Or imagine the millions of visitors who have gone to Disneyland and Disneyworld because of their love for the films the Disney brand has made over the decades and the impact it has had over the generations. There could be potentially millions of kids, who perhaps years from now will cite Disney films as their influence and basis for their work even if they do not enter the creative world. So why does this matter? From history we can see how influential art has become to the generations that followed but what I believe is even more important is the emotional connection that art establishes between itself and the audience. There are certain emotions that are evoked when one listens to a song. Over the decades, many experiments have been conducted that show the relationship between instruments and emotions. FAITH FOLLOWS

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One experiment from Teun Lucasseen at semanticscholar. org showed that the piano was neutral in its emotional response and the participants felt emotions of joy and sadness when they listened to a piano whereas the cello and alto saxophone drew sad responses from the participants. We all have that one song that we love that when we listen to, evokes feelings of happiness and takes us back to the exact memory and season when we first listened to that song, album or musical score. In return we have that one song that when we listen to that stirs up feelings of sadness and grief and reminds us of a season in our life when that album/song was prevalent in our lives. Or what about that specific breakup song that you listened to that helped you through that tough season with lyrics you related to, to personify yourself into the music? What’s remarkable is that

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art can be interwoven into our memories and can induce certain emotions out of us. This certainly isn’t limited to music and transcends to all mediums of art whether it’s writing, theater, painting, film, architecture, sculptures... art evokes an emotional response. We relate to art because of the way it makes us feel. I still remember the first time I went to see Spider-Man. The opening credits and stringed score from Danny Elfman not only played with my emotions, but the acting, cinematography and action sequences brought to life the comic books I once read as a kid. It was one of the most defining moments of my life and I can distinctly recall almost seventeen years later the time, place and the exact theater my brother and I were in when we watched that

“It is through our own innate lives that our distinctive voices tell the stories of our art and in reverse, our art tells the story of our lives”

film. That’s the level of influence art can have over our lives. Art has the ability to make a lasting impact and create life defining moments. We all can recall specific times in our lives when we watched that one thing or heard that one song or glanced at that one painting or read that one book. These are the events that can shift our lives and can eventually inspire the next generation of artists to create.

That being said, art is also a reflection of God. After all the original Artist, God himself, created life and everything we see into existence, and we are the direct benefit from His glory. The ability to create art is a gift from God and we should revel in everything we create to reflect the one who gave humanity the ability do so in the first place.

We don’t need a VHS tape with songs of freedom to know that art in all its glory allows us to relate to the subject. Art inspires us and gives us hope. As long as we remain on Art gives the artist the freedom to release emotions, this Earth, humanity’s reliance upon art is a symbiotic bond thoughts and words through whatever medium to voice woven into us by an all loving creator. their creativity, angst, pain and emotions. And we as the audience benefit from the artistic expression of the artist whether it was the innate intention of the artist or not. And that’s why art matters.

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WHATâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S What to expect in the coming weeks and months

NEXT?

Photography by Carlos Solorzano

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Please pray for... Notre Dame Cathedral in Paris Publication for next issue Political crisis in Venezuela Political peace in the United States End of drought in Somaliland

Faith Follows is tackling the theme of justice throughout our next issue. This summer we’re going to collaborate with world changers and difference makers who excel in combatting poverty, sex trafficking and those working against human rights violations. We will hear from those doing excellent work in refugee settlement, politics, women’s rights, racism reconciliation, diversity awareness and more. We believe this to be strong on our hearts that the issue of justice is not just a theme or

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one-time discussion, but an ongoing conversation that we must constantly dialogue to make a difference in our world. We hope you’ve enjoyed the digital issues of Faith Follows. Don’t worry, we’re not going anywhere! We strongly believe and are praying to move towards physical publication. We’re excited for this venture and believe this to be the next step in moving forward.

KEEP IN TOUCH Thank you for reading this magazine and being a part of the journey. If you would like us to send you a postcard or want to get in touch about publishing, send us a message. Thank you! 906/12 Defries, Zetland, NSW 2017 Australia INSTAGRAM

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Faith Follows - Spring Issue Four 2019

Articles inside

A Moment with Jessie Swinford

Why Art Matters

Monday Monday

Phyl

Jungle Boi

Sarah

Rich