Family Times Auckland Spring 2012 by Family Times Magazine

Spring Issue 2012

ISSN 1178 5268

AU C K L A N D

Is it Easy Street for kids today? How expectations

Kids in business

have changed

Encouraging young entrepreneurs

Get kids into the kitchen Having fun with food!

Win Win Win

Competitions, giveaways and vouchers

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Homework Too much? Not enough?

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inside this issue

Contents Spring 2012 5

Features 4 The importance of play

Kids having fun while learning!

5 Parenting girls

How to communicate and cope with daughters

6 Are we too easy on today’s children?

How expectations have changed over the generations

8 Tablets vs. computers Making the right choice

17 Fit families

17 Safety in the home

17 Why exercise?

19 Parties

Be active everyday Sport Waitakere shares activity tips.

18 The homework debate Too much or not enough?

Comment

9 Baby and toddler

How children shape their world through play 12 Kids’ view We ask children if they think their childhood 10 Getting kids into the kitchen differs from their parents or grandparents.. Encouraging healthy eating with help from

Special features

the kids

11 How to talk and listen to your kids 16 Cycle safety Dealing with feelings and emotions

2012/2013 primary and intermediate school term dates Term 4, 2012

ol Scho m Te r s e Dat

Choosing a bike

2012/2013 secondary and composite school term dates Term 4, 2012

Tuesday 15 October to no later than Friday 14 December

Term 1, 2013

Monday 15 October to no later than Thursday 20 December

Between Monday 28 January and Thursday 7 February to 19 April

Term 3, 2013

Term 2, 2013

Term 1, 2013

Monday 6 May to Friday 12 July

Term 2, 2013

Monday 6 May to Friday 12 July

Term 3, 2013

Monday 29 July to Friday 27 September

Robyn Willis

Design & Production Moody Shokry

Advert Production

Target Press Production Office

Editor

Vanessa O’Brien

Assistant Editor Rachel Taniwha

Digital Editor Fiona Smith

Contributing Writers

Lee Keenan , Karyn Riley, Wayne Webb, Joseph Driessen, Gill Connell

Advertising Sales

Caren Constable, Tina Barriball, Shona Robb, Nicky Barnett, Jane Hunter, Vanessa Newman, Katrina Wright

Office Manager Raelyn Hay

Office Administrator Jackie Pithie

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Good old-fashioned birthday party games to enjoy and decorations to make.

21 Let’s go tramping!

Get outdoors – family-friendly walks and huts

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WIN

Resource information 3 School Term Dates 14 Calendar of events 15 Entertainment 22 Marketplace

Look out for these icons throughout the publication for the chance to win great prizes. In this issue, you can win a MacPac Vamoose Carrier, two Mocka bikes and trips on the Interislander!

WAITOMO HOLIDAY FUN! 28 Sept - 14 Oct 2012

Monday 29 July to Friday 27 September

2012 public holidays remaining

Labour Day - 22 October (Monday) Christmas Day - 25 December Boxing Day - 26 December

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__________________ Distribution Printed and distributed quarterly approximately two weeks before each major school holiday. 66,187 distributed through early childhood centres, primary, intermediate schools and city council libraries. The opinions expressed in this publication are not those of the publisher unless indicated otherwise. No part of this publication may be reprinted without the expressed written permission of the publisher. Family Times is not responsible for unsolicited material. Family Times is funded and published solely through the support of its advertisers. They support us, please support them.

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From the editor The importance of play Of all the combinations of words in the world that have the power to irk me, these three do it best: “it’s not fair.”

“Life’s not fair,” I respond pragmatically. “You might as well get used to it.” It’s not that I’m a pessimist, or trying to impart pessimism into the upcoming generation. But I think a little realism can help develop a tenacity in people – even little people - that cultivates character that won’t crumble at the first obstacle in life. I’d like to imagine that these words of wisdom are my own, but I have a sneaking suspicion creeping up on me. Are they the exact same words my mother spoke to me? On contemplation, I’m pretty sure they are. They echoed through my head every time I had to hang out the washing, do the dishes, make the lunches, ride back from the shops on my Raleigh 20 with groceries bags balanced on the handle bars, iron school shirts, vacuum the floor, or mow the lawns. Now, that’s not a comprehensive list of chores, but by today’s standards, it’s practically child slavery. And no amount of salty tears streaming down my face moved my mother. As it turns out - to the complete surprise of a 10-year-old me, quivering at the injustice of it all - I survived. Most parents I know today look back on those days as a kind of golden age – a time when kids were kids, adults were obeyed, and life was somehow simpler. There’s a general feeling that much of today’s young generation has a sense of entitlement. It’s not just kids: Generation Y is well documented for expecting the best jobs with

the best benefits, before they’ve paid their dues. But as much as we hearken to bygone values, we live in a different world. Today’s modcons mean that littlies aren’t bringing in the firewood or slaving over hot, soapy water, but more is expected of them in terms of achievement – in academics, sports, cultural activities and club memberships. Kids spend less time on household chores, but it hasn’t translated into more time for imagination and free play. I frequently hear the exhausted sighs of exasperated parents trying to keep up with their kids’ busy schedules. Now, every parent wants the best for their child, but the question has to be asked: are we expecting too much of parents these days, and not enough of kids? We ask the experts what they think in our main parenting article this edition. We’ve also got plenty of parenting tips, competitions and ideas to keep the whole family entertained this spring. Enjoy! Vanessa O’Brien

NZ’s No.1 parenting publication

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Play is important for a child’s development and through play they can learn to make sense of the world. Parents have a vital role in helping their child to grow and learn. Being involved in their play can be a great opportunity to bond with your child and can also be a lot of fun! Active play Encouraging your child to be active will help their body and mind to develop. Some things you could try include playing some lively music to dance, crawl, creep or climb to. Ask your child to move like a snake, a bird, or show you what a slowly melting ice-cream in the sun might look like. You could build an obstacle course inside using chairs, tables, blocks, rugs, boxes, planks and cushions, or beanbags to provide opportunities for climbing, crawling, jumping and balancing. It can be a lot of fun to let your toddler crawl behind you as you lead them around a spontaneous obstacle course.

Imaginative play

Children have active imaginations and you can encourage this by pitching a tent inside or put blankets or old curtains over tables or pegged to chairs to make a playhouse with boxes and cushions inside for furniture. You might like to invite other children over to play too - or perhaps organise with a group of friends to take turns to meet together in different houses. Children often enjoy playing in a different environment and it is a great way for them to practice social skills.

Scientific play

To explore the natural world you and your children could grow carrot and parsnip tops in a saucer of water; sprout kumara in a glass jar on a shelf (it is a very fast growing vine); sprout old potatoes in a shoe box with a hole cut in one end – the sprouts will grow towards the light; grow watercress on damp cotton wool; grow spring bulbs in an old wine carafe filled with water (you can plant it out later); grow a broad bean in a glass jar; or plant a mixture of seeds in egg cartons – such as chick peas, pumpkin,

peas and beans. It can also be a lot of fun to make a bird cake from old bread, seed, jam and fat and hang it outside the window so the birds can be watched from inside.

Creative play

Play dough is great for children to make creative masterpieces and to play at imitating cooking and meal preparation activities. There are a range of recipes online to choose from and recipes using salt will last quite some time if kept in the fridge. You might like to make plain coloured dough and give the children different food colouring in little squeezy bottles to add their own colours. You could also add further variety by scenting the dough with essences and changing the texture by adding other materials such as glitter and crushed egg shells. The kitchen sink can be a great place for playing with water – children can help wash the dishes (remember to supervise children playing with water closely). Warm soapy water can be used to bathe dolls or any other toys - spreading newspaper on the floor will help to catch any splashes. You can make ice shapes by freezing containers with coloured water, flowers, and objects like shells. You can also vary the shape of containers, for example freezing rubber gloves filled with water then peel off to make ice hands.

Cognitive development and language skills

There are plenty of activities that can help your child to develop language, reading and writing skills - by talking, singing, rhyming, reading and storytelling with them. Write down the stories and poems that they tell you. You could tape these stories and play them back. Using finger and hand puppets is a great way to develop their stories further and to develop characters. Article contributed by Plunket Visit www.plunket.org.nz.

Parenting girls Parenting girls involves the same fundamental parenting skills as for boys. These skills include setting up a good one-to-one relationship with your daughter; discussing with her your expectations and supporting her with her difficulties.

dditionally, parents need to run a wellorganised household that provides structure and routines so that your daughter is supported in her efforts to meet the demands of family, school, hobbies and sports commitments. Finally, it also involves setting clear boundaries and providing natural and logical consequences if she persists in breaking those boundaries. As well as practising these critically important parenting skills, it pays for parents to consider that the strengths of girls’ personalities can also have associated liabilities. Many girls have strongly developed empathy skills, which enables them to form close and supportive relationships with both family and friends. The downside of this is that girls can become over-involved with too many social relationships, and become overextended in trying to meet the resulting maintenance demands of these relationships. Wise parents monitor the danger signs of this and help their daughters to moderate this tendency. Associated with this tendency of having too many social contacts, some girls overburden themselves with the worries of their friends and relatives, and become anxious and

ISS

“...some girls overburden themselves with the worries of their friends and relatives, and become anxious and preoccupied about their inevitable ups and downs.” preoccupied about their inevitable ups and downs. Some girls have large friendship groups in which all the girls are endlessly preoccupied with yet another problem of one of the members, and these constant worries affect the mental outlook of all the girls involved in the group. Including in this mix of relationships is the tendency of some younger girls to become intensely involved with one particular friend with which they share their most intimate and personal secrets. Sometimes these friendships can blossom into enduring adult friendships which bring great happiness and support for both girls. However, they can also end into catastrophic breakups which unleash intense feelings of grief, betrayal and anger. At times these feelings are shared and amplified by the wider friendship groups of both girls, and then a longstanding social vendetta involving rumours and slander can go back and forth between the ex-friends and their friends, causing a great deal of hurt and misery to the girls involved. Wise parents and teachers then should intervene, and should invest time and counsel the two girls into accepting the breakup of their friendship, and to insist on stopping the social vendetta. It also pays for fathers and mothers to consider their individual approaches with their daughters. Fathers have a great influence on their daughters, and the strength of this parental

relationship will delay the need for a girl to start searching for a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship. This delay is an advantage, because it will enable your daughter to embark on these kind of relationships with far greater maturity and internal stability. Fathers also need to be aware that many girls want to process their feelings by just talking things through, and that often the best thing a father can do is to lend a listening ear, without too much advice giving. Mothers too can benefit from standing back and reflecting on their relationship with their daughter. Many daughters will testify that their mothers are their best friends, and research shows that mothers support their daughters right through their adult lives. However, there can be a downside to these strong mother-daughter relationships in that the daughter is unable to extricate herself from her parent, and is not able to ever become a truly independent and autonomous person in her own right. A mother therefore needs to be careful to foster the

independence of her daughter. Before girls embark on their teenage years, it pays for parents to lay a strong foundation of instilling safe self-management practices. Teenage years are exhilarating and at times difficult, but the best parents manage to negotiate and/or insist on safety first. Research shows that those parents who have developed and maintained strong, caring and mutually respectful relationships with their daughters manage to get their girls through the difficult adolescent times, and witness them blossoming into strong and wonderful young women. All this takes steady self-reflection; the determination to be the best parent you can be; the wisdom and love to engage with your daughter as she encounters difficulties and the courage to intervene when she requires your boundaries, support and guidance. By Joseph Driessen, education consultant Driessen speaks to parent and teacher groups about education. Email j.o.d@xtra.co.nz.

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feature story

Are we too easy on today’s children? “When I was your age…” Those few words have resonated throughout generations of families worldwide.

oday’s parents heard it from their parents, and undoubtedly today’s children hear it from their parents. Is it just a case of the older generation ranting and raving about the difficulties of life without today’s mod-cons, or was life really different in bygone days in terms of values and expectations? The stories are endless; walking to school in the snow, chopping wood for the fire, washing clothes by hand. Kids playing on the streets and walking to school were once a frequent sight, but not in today’s world. While the older generation may be quick to point the finger at today’s parents for making life too easy for their kids, and potentially raising a nation of overly dependent, lazy children, experts that Family Times spoke with said that it was not a cut-and-dried case. Parental expectations are still there, but they are different from bygone generations. While today’s kids are not necessarily shovelling snow, that doesn’t always mean that their lives are a cake walk, or that parents have lost control of parenting.

Who’s the boss?

Family therapist and parenting coach Diane Levy thinks it is much more difficult for today’s parents to raise children than it was a generation ago. “When our parents asked their

children to do something they did it without hesitation.” Parents felt absolutely entitled to ask children to do something without worrying about whether they were being positive enough or phrasing it the right way. “They certainly never felt obliged to offer us incentives for ordinary household chores or our homework obligations.” She says that with the influence of the many parenting experts these days (and admits she is one of them) and their varying opinions on how to raise children, it is no wonder that parents hesitate at each step of the parenting journey. “The effect is that it is quite hard to tell who is in charge – parent or child.”

Are we too soft?

Maybe it’s a safety conscious society, or overprotective parents, but the sight of children playing in the streets and making their own fun, which was once common, is no longer the norm. The Parenting Place creative director John Cowan says his parents were “delightfully neglectful”. As a child he would dawdle from school, go to his mates’ places or play on the railway lines and by the creek. The only time he had to phone was if he wasn’t going to be home for tea. He does say however, child accident rates then were four times higher than they are today, so the vigilance of today’s parents is not all neurotic overprotection. “Walking to school and catching public transport is probably as safe as it always has been.” Eldercare Canterbury co-ordinator Valda Reveley, who discussed the issue of

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expectations of today’s children compared to previous generations with a member of an Elder Care Canterbury Consumer Group, said perhaps parents today were too protective. Children needed to be encouraged and shown how to become independent. “If you make things “too safe” they won’t cope when they get older. Be logical but don’t make our children fearful, dependent and less able to become independent thinkers and problem solvers, compromising their ability to parent well themselves.” On the other hand, parents do need to educate

children about scenarios that could put them at risk. Technology today has changed the whole game-plan in that regard, with the widespread use of cell phones and social media.

Entitlement and the changing face of the family Family dynamics have certainly changed from previous generations: the average age of firsttime mothers has risen, the number of children in the “average” family has dropped, and there are more single parents and combined families. The cost of living has increased, but so has relative income. More children are in childcare

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feature story

to enable both parents to work and receive a double income. Given the economic changes and greater focus on consumer goods, Levy says today’s parents feel more obliged to come up with good explanations and justifications for why their children cannot have everything they want. “Our parents were better at simply saying “no”.”

Expectations

Children in previous generations were undoubtedly expected to assist with more household chores. With today’s heat pumps, dishwashers, packaged and processed foods, microwaves and combined washer/dryers, children are largely spared these domestic duties. Cowan says he was the indulged baby of the family and suspects he got off lightly in terms

of chores. However, his own children, who are now young adults, all helped with household duties. “I am convinced that has contributed to their independence. Chores teach life skills, they help kids feel competent and it teaches them to work. They learn that that a family mucks in together to get things done.” However, clinical psychologist Dr Fran Vertue said that in most cases, expectations of children around the home were greater 25 years ago when educational options were broader and there was far less academic competition. “While some parents may put less emphasis on their children being in paid work or doing chores around the house, they have much higher expectations in terms of their children’s achievements.” There are definite bonuses to having high hopes - Levy says children can learn to be productive if parents raise their expectations. “If we raise our expectations of how they contribute to the family and that we expect them to contribute well at school and take full advantage of the educational opportunities offered to them, our children are likely to meet these expectations.” Furthermore, Levy says that today there is more variety available for children in school subjects and after school activities, but far less time to play and find ways of entertaining themselves. Dr Vertue says one of the struggles she has is with parents who insist that their children are constantly busy after school and on weekends with activities that are meant to extend them in some way. “Children seemed to have more free time than they do now.”

The influence of parents

So, although expectations of today’s children in the home are not as high as in previous generations, children have less free time and more planned activities. But ultimately, parents hold the key to finding that balance, and

shaping their children to become productive adults and independent decision makers in an ever-changing world. Dr Vertue says parents need to find the equilibrium (which shifts constantly as children develop) between pushing them out into the world and holding them in a safe, nurturing way. “Some parents expect their children to understand issues that are way beyond their capacity – the children are treated like short adults – with the result that the children are constantly disappointing their parents. Sometimes, children just get exhausted from their parents’ demands.” Of course there are parents at the other end of the spectrum who make so few demands that their children are developmentally delayed in terms of independence, says Dr Vertue. Cowan says that not only are children less independent than before, they are staying

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dependent longer. According to an Australian expert on boys, Ian Lillico, the median age for boys to leave home is 26 years and climbing. So, are today’s parents doing a good job in a consumer society that expects less in the home, but demands more in terms of achievement? Levy says that from a parenting perspective, it’s more difficult to raise children to be whole and healthy contributing people, but there is a “splendid opportunity to tailor-make our parenting toward raising our children in a direction that will be good for them and good for the community.” “Most importantly, if we are going to raise our children well, we need to find a way of giving them a community to belong to and contribute to and as parents. We need to find a way of sticking together,” she says. By Rachel Taniwha

Key points of “our parents versus us” Our parents felt absolutely entitled to ask children to do something without worrying about whether they were being positive enough or phrasing it the right way – parents of this generation feel more obliged to offer incentives. Children need to be encouraged and shown how to become independent. If things are made too safe, it will be hard to cope when they’re older. Be logical but don’t make your children fearful, dependent and less able to become independent thinkers and problem solvers, compromising their ability to parent well themselves. Today’s parents feel more obliged to

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come up with good explanations and justifications for why their children cannot have everything they want. Our parents were better at simply saying no. Household chores help contribute to independence. Parents these days tend to expect more from their child(ren) in terms of achievement. Children are not short adults! Don’t expect them to understand issues beyond them. Children are staying at home longer than previous generations. Give them a sense of community to belong to and contribute to.

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Tablets Vs. Computers? As with most modern purchases, the personal details of your own situation will determine which device is right for you. It’s very easy to get caught up in the very popular rush for tablets, or to easily dismiss this as a fad. Understanding what your circumstances dictate and what your options are is the way to find the best solution.

Differences:

Definitions:

It really depends on what you need. If you can only afford to invest in one technology first then the best solution is the one that suits the most of your needs. The biggest consideration is often price and capability. Most people will probably end up with both devices in their homes or office as time progresses. Devices are getting smarter, cheaper and more usable every day so the future is more devices, and more connectivity.

Tablets are by definition and description computers, but with a specific size and interface. Generally a tablet is a rectangular screen with no attached keyboard that operates mainly by touch screen input. You can easily distinguish a tablet by some easy characteristics: • It’s bigger than a mobile phone, but smaller than a full screen computer or laptop. • No physical keyboard • Operates by touch • Is portable • Is called a tablet, phablet, pad, slate or book (The phablet is a new term that describes that interim step between a large mobile phone and a small tablet.) The personal computer (PC) on the other hand is generally a machine that sits on a desk with keyboard, processor box, mouse and screen. In the case of a laptop, it has all of these features built into a single device and can be opted to be portable and run on battery power or be plugged into an electrical outlet.

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There are advantages and disadvantages to both types of computer. PC’s (or Macs) are generally much more powerful and capable of a lot more than a tablet, but also weigh much more and are less portable. Even the lightest laptop finds it hard to compete with the lighter, smaller tablets. Operating systems and programmes available for computers are currently more capable than tablets, but not by much and the tablet software market grows literally every minute with new applications and software being written and released much faster than computer software. Touchscreen technology is very intuitive but also cumbersome when typing large amounts.

What about my situation?

What about for children or families?

This is a personal choice, because each device can provide different levels of security. Portable devices are great because kids pick them up and learn them incredibly fast. But they are portable, so easily lost, stolen or bullied away from them. And with a 3G capable tablet your child is always connected to the Internet, which is both useful and risky depending on the age of your child. A desktop never leaves your house, is easier for you to manage and can be secured however you like, very easily.

For older children and teenagers the tablet is almost the modern equivalent of what a car used to represent – freedom and independence. Parents should make their decision based on what their situation suggests and what the age and responsibility of their children is. The best thing to do is be informed and not just jump on the bandwagon of which device is coolest or looks the nicest. If you are very worried about security then set limits and actively monitor usage and content regardless of the device being used. By Wayne Webb Wayne Webb is a community services manager for SmallWorlds - an online gaming site that caters to a 13 plus age range - an avid technology fiend and the father of two children who also love “screen things”.

Tablets Advantages

Disadvantages

Portable

Less powerful

Cheap

Some software not available

New software all the time

3G charges very expensive in NZ

Can connect anywhere

Hard to type large amounts of text on

Wi Fi network

Harder to monitor for parents

Games, music and movies friendly Freedom and independence

Personal Computers Advantages

Disadvantages

Powerful

Less portable

More software available

Internet connection based on location

Better for large amounts of typing

No 3G charges (in most cases)

Better for intricate work and detail

Heavy and tied to one or limited locations.

Network hard connection or Wi Fi.

More expensive than tablets (generally)

Games, music and movies friendly Easier to secure and monitor

baby & toddler

How children shape their world through play Miniature toys such as dolls, action figures, toy vehicles, animals, dinosaurs, aliens, and the like are powerful tools in the hands of little ones. And for good reason: this kind of play shrinks the world down into manageable, kid-sized experiences for working out complex, emotional and social concepts. Power play

“...miniatures let children figure out how to make everything right with the world according to their own world view.” us everyday – the one who responds to their needs – the responsible, reliable, “go to”. The desire to be like us is often reflected in this kind of play: feeding your baby doll, gassing up your Tonka truck, defeating the bad guys or kissing the frog to turn him into a prince. Even “smash and bash” play, such as an all out Hot Wheels demolition derby in the living room, is about controlling events -smashing things up, putting it all back together, then smashing them up again! In short, miniatures let children figure out how to make everything right with the world according to their own world view.

Separating the boys from the girls

About the time children start exploring these play patterns you may begin to notice differences between what boys and girls choose to play with. Often, this seems to come out of nowhere. I’ve had many parents swear to me that they provide a balanced, non-

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There is no difference

In these early years, a child’s play choices have little – and maybe even nothing – to do with his/her gender and everything to do with what he/she needs to experiment with and solve emotionally and socially. And because miniatures give all the power to the child, they are ideal for this kind of internal exploration of self. Any “meaning” ascribed to a child’s choice of doll or action figure, magic wand or light saber, princess carriage or Batmobile, is an adult filter that misses the point.

Baby Talk Your baby is crying – tired? Hungry? Your toddler is wildly pointing – what do they want? Oh no, it’s tantrum time! If only they could just tell you! For more than 25 years, parents around the world have been using baby sign language to help with communication. Baby Talk® baby sign language is for kiwi kids and uses simple signs combined with spoken words to help your child to communicate before they can easily converse. See www.babytalk.co.nz for more information.

So often, boys and girls play the exact same way; to tend to, fix, take care of, nourish, rescue, solve, defend and restore. In short, to make the lives of others better. And in my view, when children are reaching for these values this early in life, something really right is going on with their upbringing, no matter what they pick out of the toy box.

By Gill Connell Gill Connell is founder of Moving Smart, co-author of Moving to Learn, and a child development expert with a focus on the natural development of children’s cognitive, emotional, social, and physical development through movement. Visit www.movingsmart.co.nz or www.movingsmartblog.blogspot.com.

Colic, reflux, and inconsolable crying Have you lived through these heartwrenching behaviours? Are you living them now? If so, our children need your voice. It is estimated that 20 per cent of newborns suffer from the unnecessary behaviour of socalled colic alone, worldwide. With live births in New Zealand recorded at 62,600 over a 12-month period, that’s 12,520 newborns and parents experiencing this diabolical start to life each year. Yet the overall statistical information on this growing problem is minimal. You can help others by taking part in a survey that strives to: • Gain a wider perspective of what is really happening for New Zealand whanau • Collate information to be used to heighten awareness

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gender selection of toys, don’t allow television or computer time, yet still their sons choose trucks and army guys, and their daughters choose dolls and tea sets. There has always been a nature/nurture debate about whether or not these play choices are part of a child’s organic wiring or if it’s due to what they are assimilating from their environment. Here’s what I believe:

If you think about it, when you’re little, it’s easy to confuse size with power. After all, grown-ups are big and seem to think they can tell children what to do. So when children play with miniatures they naturally take on the power role, trying on what it feels like to be big, to have the ultimate say and to control events. And through that power, like Spiderman, children naturally learn how to take on responsibility. You see, children aspire to the hero they see in

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• Glean specific information about certain methods

• Create a space for voice • Magnify the necessary points for change of some practices

• Bring about further possibilities of research • Become a “nation of one” on the subject • Enhance conducive solutions that work

for all newborns Please take time to evoke further understanding, and thus potential change for our young. Help collate solid national statistics while going into a fabulous prize draw. Visit www.naturalwinding.co.nz to take part in this survey. The survey begins August and runs until the start of December.

Food and nutrition guidelines for kids - loaded with common sense Give me some space to work things out – It’s official; the best nutrition but stick around in case I need to ask.” and education brains in 5. Resist “you should have” comments the country have made “If I want to know, I’ll ask.” a recommendation* that 6. Be impressed parents are advised to involve “If you expect me to do this again you need to be impressed, so you might have to “fake their kids in food shopping it ‘til I make it.” And don’t go telling all your and cooking family meals. friends if I burn something or do something

ow - what a trump card for parents. It is not just you nagging to get your kids to help – evidence from the experts actually backs you up. Your kids are likelier to be healthier if they help. Why? Because study after study shows that a child who has practical food skills makes better food choices. Okay, so this is good in theory, but how do you do it? I ran some focus groups with kids aged 9 - 15 years to find the sort of things parents could do to encourage cooking. What I found out was seriously enlightening, somewhat amusing and really helpful. These eight key points could verge on being precocious – but it certainly helps us if we know what they are thinking. In their words, this is what parents should do:

1. Let me choose what I cook “Simple – if I don’t like it, I’m not going to want to cook it.”

2. Get me a recipe with decent instructions that work

“If I go to the effort of cooking I want it to work. I don’t want to have to keep running to you to ask what to do next.”

3. Have all the ingredients

“Don’t expect me to be able to substitute ingredients when I am just starting off on this cooking lark!”

4. Stay out of the kitchen

“Don’t be a helicopter hovering around.

stupid. Don’t make me look like a fool.”

7. Don’t nag

“If I take a bit longer than you do or I don’t clean up exactly like you do, cut me some slack – I have just cooked you a meal!”

8. Cut me a deal!

“If you expect me to buy into this “cook a meal once a week idea” there has to be something in it for me. This “skills for a lifetime” doesn’t really flick my switch – but money for the movies or that new dress does. You are probably going to buy me new stuff at some stage anyway, so you may as well make me think I have earned it.” Other recommendations from the Ministry of Health include eating together as a family, eating from the four food groups daily and ensuring food safety. Other guidelines look at physical activity, because food cannot be considered in isolation if you want a healthy child. However, whilst juggling the demands of work, school and family many of us struggle with the practical reality of making it happen. Well I have a plan for that too… My teen daughter and I have developed an online cooking program to really engage children to become food savvy and prepare family meals. This programme, which runs 2-4 October, gets your children cooking your dinner, in your home, using your food. It harnesses the power of role models by using

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issue 2011

Check out our Competitions online and win! www.familytimes.co.nz

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a teen to inspire children. Your children learn to cook while they hang out with other kids online. It’s not just cooking: we slip in all sorts of other foodie things such as making food choices, reading labels and kitchen safety. Plus they gain confidence both in the kitchen and on the computer. Activities and competitions encourage the children to share, contribute, be creative, create an occasion to eat together and do something nice for other people.

Problems with Alcohol or other Drugs?

Call the Alcohol Drug Helpline today for free, confidential, friendly professional advice. Phone: 0800-787 797 www.alcoholdrughelp.org.nz

So here is a clear action plan - enrol your kids in the It’s My Turn to Cook Tonight Bosch School Holiday Programme at www.foodsavvykids. com and sit back while they have fun, learn food skills, and you get your dinner cooked! * On 6 August The Ministry of Health released Food and Nutrition Guidelines for Healthy Children and Young People (aged 2-18 years). Details at www.healthed.govt.nz. By Glenda Gourley, Food Savvy Kids

DRI Sleeper by Anzacare® Do you have a bed-wetter and have tried everything? Don’t despair; there is effective treatment for bed-wetting. DRI Sleeper® bed-wetting treatment alarms, designed by New Zealand psychologist Dr Anthony Page, are manufactured in New Zealand and exported world-wide. A bed-wetting alarm is the only research-proven method to train your child’s brain to wake before wetting. Read about it in the report on www.DRI-Sleeper.com. You can buy online or phone 03-5489655. Back-up professional treatment advice is included.

How to talk and listen to your kids “You don’t understand!” “You never let me…” “It’s not fair!” “I hate you!”

hese and other hurtful words are often heard by parents from angry, upset children, resulting in retaliation, shouting and angry escalation in both adults and children. Parent well-being educator and author Karyn Riley shares some simple, practical ways to improve family communication and enjoy a more pleasant, calm family environment.

Dealing with feelings and emotions

When children lash out verbally or physically, there’s usually a reason behind the behaviour. Many children, especially young children and teenagers, have difficulty dealing with their

emotions. They can feel frustrated and end up losing control as a result of overwhelming emotions or the sense that they’re not being fully listened to. As parents, we’re often given ways to manage children’s behaviour e.g. time-out, consequences, punishment or withdrawal of privileges. Unfortunately, despite good intentions, many parents find these often lead to a negative spiral of undesirable behaviours, with anger, blame and resentment on both sides. It’s important to deal with children’s feelings first before jumping in to fix or sort things out, allow an emotionally-charged situation to “cool down”, then talk through desired or appropriate behaviour techniques. When children feel they’re acknowledged, listened to, and loved unconditionally they generally behave better. Start by sitting down and fully listening to them.

Try not to interrupt or offer advice, suggestions or solutions. Acknowledge what they’re saying and that you’re actively listening with one-word sounds e.g. “I see.”, “Mmm.”, “Ah ha.” Let them get everything off their chest first, then

“When children feel they’re acknowledged, listened to, and loved unconditionally they generally behave better.” together look for positive outcomes or better ways of dealing with things next time. If they’re too wound up, frustrated or angry to physically sit down and talk, depersonalise the situation and acknowledge their feelings

by putting a name to what they’re feeling. For example, instead of saying “Don’t speak to me like that!” try saying “I see you’re feeling angry/hurt/upset. Do you want to talk about it, do you need some space, or would a cuddle help?” This gives children choice and a sense of control when they’re often feeling very much out of control and looking to us for guidance, support and reassurance. It’s also important to deal with our feelings and emotions, too. Try not to respond to undesirable behaviours with anger, passiveaggressive behaviours e.g. threats, blame, criticism or revenge. These will only inflame the situation and can result in long-term repercussions due to things said or done in the heat-of-the-moment. If necessary, take timeout yourself until you’re calm, ready to listen and talk rationally.

Effective problem solving "Many children, especially young children and teenagers, have difficulty dealing with their emotions." For some children, especially younger kids, try simply distracting them or change the subject by saying “I wish I could eat lollies every day/ go to bed late/do whatever I wanted too… let’s draw a picture/write down a wish list of all the things we’d like to do in our “ideal world”.” You could even use these ideas to look for a solution or compromise. For adolescents, try to involve them in problem-solving and finding a solution acceptable to both parties, once emotions have settled down. One of the best ways to deal with undesirable behaviour is to keep ownership of the problem or situation with the child (age-appropriate). Explain the desired behaviour then ask what can they do to make amends/solve the problem/clean-up. Ask open questions to explore options and possibilities. By listening fully, speaking nicely and staying calm, we’re role-modelling desirable behaviours for our children for effective problem solving, conflict resolution, providing essential life skills for adulthood and an enjoyable family environment. By Karyn Riley Karyn Riley helps busy women find balance, rediscover their identity and have time for their priorities. For more information, visit www.rileylife.co.nz.

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Great giveaways for Spring…....

Lee Keenan from Family Times visited Orewa North Primary School to talk with kids about how they think their childhood differs to that of their parents and grandparents.

It’s easy to win fantastic prizes with Family Times. Just fill in the entry form and post it to us by the due date, or enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz. This month we have a fantastic line up of prizes with more great giveaways… Good luck!. Check out last issue’s lucky winners online.

September MADAGASCAR 3: EUROPE’S MOST WANTED

opens in NZ cinemas with Alex the Lion, Marty the Zebra, Gloria the Hippo, and Melman the Giraffe still fighting to get home to their beloved Big Apple, and of course King Julien, Maurice and the Penguins are all along for the comedic adventure. Their journey takes them through Europe where they find the perfect cover: a travelling circus, which they reinvent – Madagascar style. Family Times has 4 prize packs including family passes, circus activity backpack, silicon watch, slap on wristband and travel set as well as 8 runner-up prize packs of merchandise to give away! Check out www.madagascarmovie.co.nz. Entries close 26 September 2012

Mum says when she was young they had to do jobs for about an hour every day and there was no such things like dishwashers, so I think our lives are easier. I do have jobs though and I get pocket money for emptying the dishwasher, vacuuming and sometimes I clean the bathroom. I have to try and keep my room tidy too. I want to get an after school job soon but I’m a bit young.

Kelsey Bett, age 11

I think I have it better because Mum says when she was young they didn’t have all the electronics like us at home and at school. In the week, I have jobs like keeping my room tidy, clearing the table and cleaning the bathroom. I get $5 a week and I have to bank half. Maybe soon I’d like a job after school too. My parents like good manners at home, like being excused from the table and no back chat!

Zoe Wilson, age 11

Cooking for Christmas – Simon and Alison Holst New Zealand’s best-loved cooking-duo, Simon and Dame Alison Holst, have updated their best selling book Cooking for Christmas. Most of us remember fondly the traditional foods that our mothers and grandmothers produced each year. Simon and Alison are confident the recipes in this book will inspire the reader to cook their own Christmas meals and treats and enjoy the experience. Many of the foods can be made some time before Christmas and there are great recipes for attractive food gifts to put under the Christmas tree. Family Times have 10 copies of Cooking for Christmas to give away!

Hotel Transylvania

Jordan Green, age 10

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Welcome to the Hotel Transylvania, Dracula’s (Adam Sandler) lavish five-stake resort, where monsters and their families can live it up, free to be the monsters they are without humans to bother them. On one special weekend, Dracula has invited some of the world’s most famous monsters – Frankenstein and his wife, the Mummy, the Invisible Man, a family of werewolves, and more – to celebrate his daughter Mavis’s 118th birthday. Family Times have five prize packs to give away containing a torch projector, a T-shirt and a double in-season pass! ©2012 Columbia TriStar Marketing Group, Inc. All Rights Reserved. In cinemas 27 September. Entries close 26 September 2012

I think we definitely have it easier than our parents because of all the electronics we have to entertain us - they had to entertain themselves. I like earning pocket money, and me and my sister take turns with chores at home. I have to keep my room tidy, do the dishes by hand, do the washing and next year, Mum’s going to teach me to iron. They’re pretty strict with manners too, which is fine.

Dylan Werton, age 10

My parents never talk about what their lives were like when they were kids, but I think our lives are a lot better. We have lots more technology to help us than they did. We have chores to do though and if we don’t do them, we don’t get our pocket money! I have to feed the chickens, clear the dishwasher or bring in firewood. I also want to get a paper run soon too.

Caesar the War Dog Caesar the chocolate Labrador doesn’t look special at the kennels. But Corporal Ben Fulton sees something different – an intelligent dog whose curiosity will make him an excellent sniffer dog in the Australian Army. This new book from Stephen DandoCollins is based on the true story of Australian military dog Sarbi and its experiences in Afghanistan, combined with the factual experiences of Endal, the devoted British dog who cared for his wheelchair-bound ex-serviceman master and became the most decorated dog in history. Family Times have three copies of Caesar the War Dog to give away.

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Swan Lake The Imperial Russian Ballet Company will perform Swan Lake during its New Zealand visit - the most loved classical ballet of them all. Swan Lake crosses the world of magic and mystical creatures with that of the real world. It is a story where the virtues of love and forgiveness conquer evil and betrayal in the end. It’s on at the ASB Theatre on Saturday 13 and Sunday 14 February. Family Times has three double passes to Swan Lake in Auckland to give away. Entries close 26 September. For more information and tickets check out www.russianballet.co.nz.

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The Family Times Design Competition What does your whanau look like? We’d love to see a drawing of you and your whanau. Draw them for us and be in to win an amazing $50 prize pack from Crayola! Three entry age groups: preschool (age 1-4), 5-8, 9-12. Create your design on an A5 sheet or download the template and entry form from www.familytimes.co.nz. Post in to PO Box 36 004, Christchurch 8146. Entries close on 12 October 2012.

Tinker Bell and the Secret of the Wings Journey with Tinker Bell and her fairy friends into the forbidden world of the mysterious Winter Woods, where curiosity and adventure lead Tink to an amazing discovery and reveal a magical secret that could change her world forever. Secret of the Wings features a spectacular voice cast including Academy Award® winner Anjelica Huston as Queen Clarion, Timothy Dalton as Lord Milori, Lucy Liu as Silvermist, Raven-Symoné as Iridessa, Mae Whitman as Tinker Bell, and introducing the sparkling new winter fairy, Periwinkle, voiced by Lucy Hale. Family Times have five packs to give away containing a watch, kids’ T-shirt and poster. In cinemas 4 October. Entries close 26 September 2012.

Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Dog Days Congratulations to our winter Olympic design poster competition winners from our last issue.

Jessica Zhang, Auckland, Age nine – 12 years

Misha Simpson, Auckland, Age five – eight years

Interislander

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It’s far more than a ferry service linking the North and South Islands – the Interislander’s voyage has been described as “one of the most beautiful ferry rides in the world”. We would like you and your family to see why! Family Times have two Interislander return family passes including car to give away, valued at over $600 each! The following conditions apply: Pass is valid for 12 months for two adults, vehicle and up to three children to travel on the Interislander return. Not valid over Labour Weekend 2012, not valid for travel 15 December 2012 through to 25 January 2013 and not valid over Easter 2013.

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In the third movie based on the popular Jeff Kinney books, during his summer vacation, Greg Heffley hatches a plan to pretend he has a job at a ritzy country club, which fails to keep him away from the season’s dog days including embarrassing mishaps at the pool and a camping trip that goes horribly wrong! Opens in cinemas 27 September. Family Times have five prize packs to give away containing a notebook and name label, colouring pencils, stationery set, bookmark and a double movie pass!

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Best of The Aunties and Musical Stories for Children Vol. 2 New Zealand children’s entertainers The Aunties formed in 1982 and have produced a staggering amount of material over the years. Best of the Aunties Kids Classics Vol. 1 contains some of the most popular Aunties songs, while Musical Stories For Children Vol.2 is suitable for children aged 7 to 12 years and features three tales; Tiddalik The Frog, The Brothers Three and Young Mozart. Family Times have four double CD packs to give away containing Musical Stories for Children Vol. 2 and Best of The Aunties Kids Classics Vol. 1.

Dance Unlimited Where would you go if you were looking for top dance training in the eastern suburbs for Royal Academy of Dancing (RAD) ballet classes and Imperial Society of Teachers of Dancing (ISTD) jazz syllabus? Dance Unlimited in Wellington Street is one of the top providers in these two dance forms in the Howick-Pakuranga area. Elizabeth Harvey, who has taught ballet for many years in America, is Dance Unlimited director. She has successfully trained many young dancers to go on to professional careers. “Training in these two forms will give young dancers qualifications that are

recognised all over the world,” she said. Harvey teaches the ballet classes, which include the popular pre-school programme, while Kim Santarelli (an International ISTD examiner) teaches the jazz classes. The studio also runs children and teen’s classes in tap, hip-hop, contemporary dance and theatre dance. Adult classes include ballet and Persian belly dance. For more information, please contact Elizabeth Harvey on 09-534-1795 or lizdance@ihug.co.nz. Visit www.eapadance.org.nz.

Just tick the things you want to win Spring 2012     

MADAGASCAR 3: EUROPE’S MOST WANTED Cooking for Christmas – Simon and Alison Holst Hotel Transylvania Caesar the War Dog Swan Lake

   

Tinker Bell and the Secret of the Wings Interislander Diary of a Wimpy Kid: Dog Days Best of The Aunties and Musical Stories for Children Vol. 2

Name Address City Phone To be in the draw to win, enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz or write your name and address on the back of an envelope or postcard and send to: Auckland Competition, P O Box 36 004, Christchurch to reach us by 12th October 2012, unless stated otherwise. Only one entry per household.

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cool activities

Calendar of Events Spring welcomes longer days to enjoy with family and friends. This calendar of events lists everything from school fairs to moon festivals, and donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t forget the classic Storyfest is on its way. 17 September â&#x20AC;&#x201C; onwards throughout 2012 In2it Street Games. Get along to these free physical activity sessions across Auckland for children and young people. They take place in many different parks during the week and weekends all year round. Full calendar at www. in2it.org.nz

22 September Ramarama School Calf Club Day . A fantastic rural day out for the whole family. Includes animals, stalls, raffles, games and more. From 8am-1pm, directions at www. ramarama.school.nz.

22 September Storyfest â&#x20AC;&#x201C; This free, fun-filled day for children includes storytelling, performances, workshops and displays. Kelston Community Centre, Sunnyvale 10am-4pm.

22 and 29 September Pick and Mix. Experience a wide range of exciting arts and cultural events like improv comedy, storytelling, hip hop and more from New Zealandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s top performing arts companies for free. From 11am-1pm, Aotea Centre, www. the-edge.co.nz.

23 September Talk Like A Pirate Day. Celebrate all things

pirate! Collect your balloon sword, get your new pirate name, create your own pirate ship and dig for treasure. Gold coin donation, 10am4pm, www.maritimemuseum.co.nz.

28 - 29 September Legends of the Moon Fesďż˝val. This event brings together a variety of cultures celebrating the moon. Free performances, craft, kidsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; entertainment and food. On 28 September, 4pm-8pm, 29 September 3pm-9pm, New Lynn Community Centre, 45 Totara Avenue.

29 September - 14 October Gum, Grit and Gold â&#x20AC;&#x201C; A Colonial Experience. Celebrate in MOTATâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s newest school holiday experience. Learn about colonial life in Auckland including MOTATâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s very own elections for Auckland mayor, digging for gum and searching for gold! From 10am-5pm. www. motat.org.nz.

22 September

29 September â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 14 October

International Food and Moon Festival . Celebrate the Moon Festival with international food, cultural performances, childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s games and activities. Free event, from 10am- 4pm at Clifton Court in Panmure.

Tiki Tag. Get along to the Torpedo Bay Navy Museum in Devonport and create your own Taonga to take home. Cast a tiki out of resin and punch your initials into a dog tag. Each

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Kiwi Flyer - The first Kiwi family movie in 27 years When 12-year-old Ben sets out to win the local trolley derby in the memory of his father, he learns what matters in life. He is forced to battle an Aussie family who will stop at nothing to win the trophy, the school loan sharks and a mother who has banned him from the race. The story is filmed entirely in the beautiful city of Nelson, and based around the annual trolley derby that has been run on and off for the last 60 years. Kiwi Flyer is a story that comes from the heart of being a Kiwi. At its core are ideas that inspire all New Zealanders: dream big, Kiwiâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s can do! This gem of a film is guaranteed to enthral and entertain families from Kaitaia to Bluff and back again. Kiwi flyer features an ensemble of trueblue Kiwi talent with a cast including Tandi Wright (Nothing Trivial, Out of the Blue), comedian Dai Henwood (7 Days), Vince Martin (Beaurepaires) and introducing to the big screen Edward Hall and Tikkirau Hathaway. Donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t miss the rousing soundtrack session takes 45 minutes and is suitable for all ages. From 10.30am-2.30pm. For bookings phone 09-445-5186 or email education@ navymuseum.co.nz.

6 October Kowhai Festival. Celebrate the beginning of spring at the Warkworth Town Centre with a free family day of fun! One hundred street stalls, rides, performers, water slide, wine and jazz show. Starts 9am. For parking details and more information visit www.kowhaifestival.co.nz.

Kumgang Taekwondo Do you want to get fit, lose weight, get stronger, more flexible, increase coordination, learn to defend yourself and become bully safe? Or learn selfcontrol, respect, get confidence and find new friends? At Kumgang Taekwondo you can get it all and much more. Kumgang Taekwondo has classes for five to sevenyear-olds, children, teens, adults, ladies only, families, beginners and advanced. Check out www.kumgang.co.nz for more information or phone 09-479-9180.

from the inimitable Don McGlashan (The Mutton Birds). Kiwi Flyer was produced by Tim Sanders (Whale Rider, The Lord of the Rings â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Fellowship of the Ring, Frighteners) and directed by Tony Simpson. Kiwi flyer will be in a cinema near you from 27 September, in time for the September school holidays. Check out the trailer at www.kiwiflyerthemovie.co.nz. When itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Kiwiâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s vs. Aussies, there can only be one winner!

27 October Olde Hallows Eve at MOTAT. For one night only, join the circus of the strange - the side show of the sinister - the theatre of the bizarre! MOTAT will transform into a thrilling Victorian Halloween. Suitable for adults and children over eight. From 7pm-11pm. www.motat.org.nz.

27 October Albany Kindergarten Gala. Bouncy castle, food stalls, face-painting, fairies, special guests and more! From 10.30am-1.30pm, 4 Bass Road, Albany.

27 October â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 4 November Waiheke Walking Festival. The Festival offers 40 free guided walks showcasing beautiful Waiheke Islandsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; beaches and bush. For all ages. Full programme at www. waihekewalkingfestival.org.

3 November St Leoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s School Village Fair 2012. White elephant, cakes, raffles, games and fun galore for all the family. At 4 Owens Road, Devonport, North Shore, 11am- 2pm.

cool activities

Entertainment

9 November Criterion National Championships. Get along to watch New Zealandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fastest cyclists along the streets of Takapuna in this great highoctane festival. The Strand, Takapuna, 4pm10pm. Full details www.bikenz.org.nz.

Spring is well and truly in the air! Now is a good time to start looking for some entertainment ideas to keep your kids occupied during the upcoming school holidays. Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve put together some fun options to get you started.

11 November Wilson Home Trust Garden Gala and Family Fun Day. A free day out supporting children with disabilities. Kidsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; rides, bouncy castle and candyfloss! From 10am-3pm, 1 St Leonardâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Road, Takapuna.

17 November

Armageddon Expo

Kids Only Market. Get along to the market where kids and young people are the stall holders! This is a great opportunity for them to sell their own goods, craft and food. From 9am-1pm, Pt Chevalier Community Centre, 18 Huia Road.

The ultimate family weekend â&#x20AC;&#x201C; gaming, comics, TV stars, laser tag, rides, music, movies, giveaways, animation, eating contests, costumes and more! On 19-22 October at ASB Showgrounds, Greenlane, Labour weekend. Full details at www.armageddonexpo.com.

17 and 24 November

Rainbows End Night Rides

Free cartoon workshops. As part of the Devonport Arts Festival, cartoonist Rob McLean is offering two free workshops for the slightly older kids at the Kerr Street Art Space, Devonport, 12pm-2pm. Bookings are essential at www.thecartoonworkshop.co.nz.

Enjoy New Zealandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s largest theme park, which is opening its doors from 5pm-11pm on 17 and 29 September, 6 and 13 October. Thrilling world-class rides like the Power Surge, the Corkscrew roller coaster and the Log Flume. Live music and fun activities. Visit www. rainbowsend.co.nz.

24 November Auckland Highland Games. A day of all things Scottish and Celtic! Haggis, food stalls, dancers, pipers, warriors and fantastic bands. From 10am-4.30pm. Free admission. Three Kings Reserve, Corner of Mt Eden and Mt Albert Roads.

24 November Pirate Themed Regatta Market Day . Calling all pirates! Go dressed as a pirate and

Get along to Talk like a Pirate Day at the Maritime Museum. you could win a prize. Great entertainment for the kids with a bouncy castle, balloons and face painting. Milford Shopping Centre, 9.30am2pm. Free admission.

24 November Willowbank School Gala. Join the amazing fun at the Willowbank School Twilight Gala. Stalls, food and entertainment. From 3pm-7pm, 56 Middlefield Drive, Dannemora, Flat Bush. Compiled by Lee Keenan

School Of Rock Get along to Rock Camp 2012. Guest mentors include The Feelers, Kora, The Exponents and more. On 19-23 December (early bird registrations close 1 October). For ages 12 to18-years. Registrations 0800-762566 or www.rockcamp.co.nz.

Holiday specials Gum, Grit and Gold â&#x20AC;&#x201C; A Colonial Experience Celebrate in MOTATâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s newest school holiday experience from 29 September-14 October. Enjoy learning about colonial life in Auckland in an array of activities including MOTATâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s very own elections for Auckland mayor, digging for gum and searching for gold! From 10am-5pm, www.motat.org.nz.

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory Join the fun at Artz on Show, 1-5 October (Milford) and 8-12 October (Botany Downs). Learn new skills in art, dance, drama and much more. Create extraordinary confectionery creatures and have the chance to act on stage as your favourite characters from the show. Phone 0800 ONSHOW or visit www.onshow.net.nz.

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Meet The Polkadots, New Zealandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s premier childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s entertainers on tour during the October school holidays. For details visit Facebook.com/polkadotsnz.

The Bead Hold School holiday classes (29 September-14 October) and birthday parties at The Bead Hold are a wonderfully creative and fun time for all ages. Full details at www.thebeadhold. co.nz or phone 09-845-1345.

The Wind in the Willows Catch the upcoming performance of this magical show on at the Logan Campbell Centre, ASB Showgrounds, Greenlane. From 6 October, shows at 10am, 1pm and 4pm. For details and bookings visit www.southernstars. org.nz or phone 09-361-4599.

The Polkadots in concert. New Zealandâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s premier childrenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s entertainers perform four shows on 29 September and 27 October in Auckland. Absolutely free. For details and tickets visit Facebook.com/ polkadotsnz.

Heritage Festival open weekend. Climb aboard heritage sailing and steam ships from around New Zealand. Hosts on-site in costume with encounters and activities throughout the museum. On 29-30 September, 9am-5pm each day. Gold coin donation. Full details at www.maritmemuseum.co.nz.

Pack Your Bags â&#x20AC;&#x201C; a one way ticket to New Zealand. Grab your voyager passport and join a whirlwind trip across the seas before arriving in Aoteroa. Experience exciting encounters in the rocking cabin, enjoy pack-your-bag races, finger painting and more. On 1-14 October 9.30am-3.30pm each day, $5 per child. Visit www.maritimemuseum.co.nz.

Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s My Turn to Cook Tonight- Bosch school holiday programme Get your children cooking in your home, using your food, with a nationwide online event, guided by Claire Gourley. From 2â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 4 October, visit www.foodsavvykids.com for information.

The Frog Prince. Would you kiss a slimy frog? North Shore Toyota and The Bruce Mason Centre present an upbeat retelling of everyoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s favourite fairytale. On 1-6 October, 10am and 12pm daily. Visit www.brucemason.co.nz or www. ticketmaster.co.nz. Compiled by Lee Keenan

Beginner Drum Lessons!

There is no better start to get your kids into music than rhythm!

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Contact School of Rock on 0800 ROCK ON (377 8584) or email, classes@SchoolofRock.co.nz 15

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safety

Cycle safety

Learning to ride a bike is a huge milestone for many children.

icycles are an important source of exercise, transportation and recreation, and for many children in New Zealand, learning to ride a bicycle is an important part of their play and development. Cycling related injuries are however one of the top 10 causes of unintentional injuryrelated deaths for children, and one of the top three causes of unintentional injury related hospitalisations for children in New Zealand. “Safekids is about keeping kids free to enjoy their childhood, which includes cycling in their communities and to school, without the adverse effects of unintentional injuries,” said Safekids New Zealand director Ann Weaver.

Here are some tips to keep your child cycle-safe: Buy a bike that suits your child’s height, skills and riding experience

Buying a bike that your child will grow into is unsafe, and could cause them to have an accident. To see if a bike is too big for your child, get them to sit on the saddle - if their toes don’t touch the ground on both sides then it’s too big. Make sure they feel comfortable when seated. Visit your local bike shop for an expert opinion on finding the right bike for your child.

The best bicycle for learning on For young or new cyclists the best bicycle to learn on should have: • A frame that can easily be straddled by the cyclist. • a seat where the cyclist can easily reach the

ground with their feet when seated.

• handlebars at seat level or above. • limited gear options. • brakes that are appropriate to the age and ability of the cyclist. Back pedal brakes may be a better alternative to hand brakes for very young children with small hands these are available on some tricycles and small bicycles. Another thing to consider is buying a bike with training wheels, as this will help your child get used to balancing. A balance bike, which has no pedals and allows children to move forward using their feet, is an ideal first bike for younger children.

Choosing a helmet

All cyclists are required to wear a helmet. When selecting one for your child make sure it is the right size and shape for their head. Buying a helmet that doesn’t fit means your child’s head won’t be protected if they fall off. When buying a helmet: • Make sure the helmet is standards approved. You can tell if it complies as there will be a standards sticker on the inside. • For information on how to fit your child’s helmet correctly, visit the resources page at bikewise.co.nz.

Some important safety tips • Lead by example. Teach your child the right

road rules. • Ensure your child cycles with a supervisor if they are under the age of 10. • Think about enrolling your child on a cyclist skills training course, which can help them build their cycling confidence and skills. • Maintain their cycle regularly – check their brakes, tyres and chain. If you have any doubts, its best to get their bike serviced by an expert or cycle shop. For more information visit www.bikewise.co.nz

Bike Barn - get some new wheels in time for spring

Whether it is upgrading, upsizing or getting your child onto their very first bike, the Bike Barn team has the know-how to be able to help you get the right bike at the right price. And if your kids are starting to out-ride you’re pace, maybe it’s time to get on some comfy wheels of your own to keep up. The staff at Bike Barn are passionate about bikes. With a quick conversation they will ensure that you and your family are fitted to the right bike. There is a great deal of reassurance for your family knowing that they are dealing with experts and that your family is on the right

bikes for your individual requirements. Bike Barn stores have fully-equipped workshops that will look after your every need, from handle bar to back wheel. All Bike Barn stores offer free safety checks on all bikes, any make or model; take this opportunity and be sure that you and your family are riding on safe bikes. At Bike Barn, they love your bike as much as you do, so your bike is in good hands! Visit www.BikeBarn.co.nz for special deals and to find your nearest Bike Barn store in the Auckland area.

Mocka Mocka is one of New Zealand’s favourite online retailers. It offers quality-made kids’ and adults’ furniture, nursery furniture and kids’ toys, all at amazing prices! Kids just love Mocka balance bikes and wooden trikes, and there is an extensive range of children’s furniture in a variety of colours and funky designs. Best of all, all Mocka products are safe, comfortable and designed to last. Mocka offers free delivery New Zealand-wide. Visit www.mocka.co.nz.

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Mocka Balance Bike and Cruise Trike! Mocka’s wooden balance bikes (or running bikes) are designed to develop your child’s balance and co-ordination in preparation for riding their first push-bike. New to the range is the Mocka Cruise Trike which is suitable for wee ones who aren’t quite big enough for our Balance Bikes. Mocka and Family Times have 2 Balance Bikes or Cruise Trikes to give away (winners will be contacted to make their choice). Enter online at www.familytimes.co.nz or write your name and address on the back of an envelope or postcard and send to: Mocka, PO Box 36 004, Christchurch, to reach us by 12 October 2012. Check out www. mocka.co.nz for more fantastic products.

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safety

Safety in the home Preventing choking and Every year in New Zealand suffocation about 13,000 children under Toddlers can easily choke on food, toys or the age of five are admitted to plastic wrapping. • Cut up food and make sure they sit while hospital with injuries.

ost injuries happen in and around the home, and many can be prevented by making simple changes to your environment. Age one is the most injury-prone stage of your child’s life. At this age they rush around on unsteady feet with little understanding of any dangers. Here are some things Plunket recommends you consider to help keep your toddler safe:

• •

they eat. Anything smaller than a ping pong ball is a choking hazard. Plastic bags can be dangerous and need to be stored out of reach. If they could fit over a child’s head, they are a suffocation risk.

Preventing poisoning

Preventing falls • Use barriers at the top and bottom of stairs. • Keep low furniture away from windows and

Toddlers will put things into their mouths as they explore and learn. Keeping all poisons outof-reach and out-of-sight, including household cleaners and medications, will reduce the risk of poisoning. • Never store poisonous liquids in softdrink bottles. • Check that poisons and medications have child-resistant tops – but remember this doesn’t mean they are child-proof. Safe storage is essential. For more information, or to download safety fact sheets, visit plunket.org.nz.

•

ACC’s Home Safety Action Week, which aims to prevent injuries in the home, will run from

Preventing drowning A child can drown is as little as 5cm of water. It can happen silently and very swiftly. Never leave a child alone near water – not even for a second – and stay within close reach whenever your child is around water.

use window catches to prevent climbing out of windows and falling. Always use safety harnesses on high chairs and buggies.

Home safety action week

Be active everyday There is a growing understanding in the community that physical activity is an essential component of a healthy lifestyle. Ideally, people should be physically active every day. Regular physical activity of moderate intensity is effective in reducing the risk of diseases such as type 2 diabetes, osteoporosis, cardiovascular disease, obesity, and some forms of cancer. Additionally, physical activity provides benefits in the management of depression and anxiety, increases mental alertness and enhances self-esteem. The reason most people cite as to why they are not more physically active is a lack of time. A key to finding time is to reduce the amount of time spent doing things that are inactive. Take a look at what you do during a normal day. Are you sitting when you could be moving around? Here are some tips that will make your

routine more active: Use the stairs instead of the lift. If you can, walk or bike to your destination. Take a 10-minute activity break at work. Walk to visit co-workers instead of sending an e-mail message. Wear a pedometer and watch your daily steps increase. Join a sports or recreation team. Plan your activity routine to gradually increase the days per week and minutes per session. Whether you plan a set activity routine or find ways to be more active during your day, the most important thing is to get more active every day. And it’s never too late to start. Article provided by Sport Waitakere. For more information see www.sportwaitakere.co.nz

1-7 October. “Fight the 5” is the focus of Home Safety Action Week. It encourages everyone to take action against five common home hazards: moss, rugs, power cords, chairs and puddles. They are just five of the many things responsible for serious falls around New Zealand homes, but it’s surprisingly easy to fight them and make your home a safer place. • Moss - remove moss from paths and steps so you don’t slip. Cut trees and shrubs back to prevent shade, a condition that moss thrives in. • Power cords – snaking power cords and general clutter are tripping hazards –

secure cords out of harm’s way and tidy up mess regularly. Keep walkways clear. • Rugs and mats – fasten rugs or mats to floors and stairs. Fix up-turned carpet to avoid nasty trips. • Chairs – chairs aren’t ladders and are very unstable if you stand on them. Using a ladder or step-ladder is much safer. • Puddles – wet areas are hazardous: wipe up spills or make bathrooms safer with a nonslip shower, bath and floor mats. It’s easy for you and your kids to be involved in Home Safety Action Week over the school holidays. Visit the schools’ activity page at www. homesafety.co.nz and find the five home hazards.

Family physical activity It’s time to take the layers off and head outside to exercise. Here are a few events you can participate in as a family. 30 September Unitec Run Walk Series.

This event is designed for runners and walkers of all abilities, including kids. There is a choice of many distances available at the Barry Curtis Park, Botany Downs. Registration and course details www.runwalk.co.nz.

4 November The Hope and Possibility Fun Run.

is just about getting the community, families and friends together. North Harbour Stadium, Albany, 8-11am. Details www.achillestrackclubnz.org.nz.

25 November ATWC Charity Walk.

Walk a set 5km route around the Auckland Botanic Gardens in Manurewa, then enjoy festivities, entertainment and a family picnic dinner, all for charity. To register contact friends@atec.org.nz or for charity information visit www.atwc.org.nz. Compiled by Lee Keenan

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Homework – too much or not enough? Homework can be a controversial topic. Is it necessary after a six-hour day school day? Are children getting enough, or too much?

he amount of homework can vary from school to school and teacher to teacher. The role of parents in encouraging - or in some cases actually doing their children’s homework - is also a factor. Educational psychologist Rose Blackett does not recommend a certain timeframe for daily homework, but rather “taming the homework monster” to suit the child and family needs. “If homework is ending in fights, arguments, or negative behaviour (from the child or parent) then things need to be reviewed quickly and adjusted.” Blackett says that whole class generic homework programmes will possibly suit the middle group in a class but will likely be far too easy (and boring) for the top end and far too challenging and time consuming for the children experiencing academic difficulties. Individualised homework programmes linked to classroom programmes and with an element of choice are suggested if homework is given. Blackett also says that for some children

getting through the school day and completing classroom tasks alone can take huge amounts of physical and cognitive energy. By the time they get home they need a snack and some down time rather than more “work” in the form of homework. She has worked with families and negotiated with schools to have more individualised homework options. “Not everything should have to be written. Doing something creative can lead to the same or better learning experiences for children.” Instead of formalised homework as such, Blackett recommends daily reading for children in the junior years. “Most new entrant/ reception teachers will report higher reading levels for children whose parents read with them and share their reading books for homework. If homework is done in a relaxed manner and is a positive experience for the child (and parent) then this can support what is happening at school and lead to positive learning outcomes.” On the flipside, she says that if a parent puts a child under pressure to complete work that is too hard or unable to be completed independently, it can be detrimental. “If a child dislikes reading because it is too difficult for them, then making them do work they cannot do every night makes them go from disliking reading to hating it with a vengeance. We are setting them up to fail every day. Parents and

Auckland Kindergarten Association Kia Ora, welcome to the Auckland Kindergarten Association (AKA). AKA was established in 1908 and is a charitable trust made up of 107 kindergartens and four early learning centres throughout the greater Auckland region. At the AKA, we provide a safe and enriching learning environment where children can develop as confident and competent learners. Our kindergartens offer quality early childhood education that is accessible, secular, non-discriminatory, and inclusive of the diversity of the children and families/whanau that attend. We believe that children learn and develop best when they are nurtured and extended by teachers who are responsive and who share with the child an understanding of the world. We value the importance of children’s play in developing meaningful learning experiences.

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Our teachers are qualified and registered (ensuring high quality educational outcomes for all children), and teaching practice is reflective of current theories of learning and development. AKA kindys provide high quality learning programmes based on Te Whariki (the national early childhood curriculum). We also value the ongoing learning of teachers, parents and whanau. We believe that the sharing of knowledge, skills and attributes is fundamental to achieving the best learning outcomes for children. All AKA kindys offer 20 hours free early childhood education per week for children aged three and over. Your local kindy can give you all the details and costs based on your needs. Visits are welcome, so for more information please feel free to drop in, meet the teachers and experience the kindy in action.

children going into battle over homework every night is not conducive to positive parentchild relationships nor does it lead to positive academic outcomes for the child.” Blackett further says that homework, if given, should be able to be completed independently by the child. In the early years, however, a parent might play a bigger role. “It can be challenging for busy, working parents to juggle homework with their other tasks each day. I suggest having a routine to suit your family after school helps. “If your child finds reading difficult for example, let them come home and have a snack and a break. Exercise and getting outside for some active boys is a must before they are ready to do any homework.” Blackett also suggests talking to teachers if homework is an issue. “Be honest if things have become negative and work with the teacher and your child to negotiate a more workable option for homework.” As to the argument of not doing homework? Blackett says that not doing homework can be detrimental, particularly in the early years. “Reading experience and exposure is important. If a child is able to read their book to mum or dad, grandparents, or even the

family cat, then they build up what is known as reading mileage. They develop skills and learn the language of “literacy”. “But homework must be fun and engaging. When my children were little we had reading picnics outside under a tree, read in the bath (bubbles included) or used puppets and silly voices to make it enjoyable. Simply changing the environment changes the task.” By Rachel Taniwha

parties

Old-fashioned birthday party fun Birthday parties are a momentous occasion full of fun and laughter, and create many happy memories for years to come.

any parents will have a favourite birthday party game they recall from their childhood: why not relive this joy time and time again? A lot of the games from yesteryear are still very popular today, require minimal planning and expense, and will guarantee lots of fun for everyone on the day. Here are some of the old classics from times past that are still delighting many at birthday parties today.

Pass the parcel

This can be played either outside or in. All you need is a pre-wrapped gift and to wrap it in loose layers of gift wrap or newspaper, with a small treat in each layer. To play the game, sit the children in a circle, play some short snippets of music and have them pass the parcel to the next person in the circle. When the music stops, the person holding the parcel removes one layer of wrapping and gets that treat. Repeat until the last layer of wrapping has been removed, restarting and stopping the music each time. You can use different treats for each layer to add a bit of mystery and keep the children interested longer. Out of fairness to all party goers, you may like to make sure you have enough layers of wrapping to cover all the partygoers and ensure the music stops at each child so they all get a turn. Suitable for any age group (even very small toddlers can play, perhaps sitting on an

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adults lap and with their help unwrapping and passing the parcel).

The chocolate game

This is a game of chance, and is a lot of fun! It is more suitable for children who are able to use a knife and fork. All that is required is a die, an outfit such as hat gloves and jacket or large shirt, a knife and fork, and chocolate on a plate. All the kids sit around in a circle and take turns throwing a dice. When someone throws a six, they have to put the clothes on as fast as they can, then use the knife and fork to start chopping a block of chocolate and eating it square by square with the fork as fast as they can. As soon as the next person throws a six, they have to stop eating and take the costume off. The game continues until all the chocolate is finished.

Pinata

Pinatas are a paper-mache or other type of light container that is decorated and filled with treats, most commonly associated with Mexico. These can be purchased or made cheaply by layering strips of newspaper glued together with a flour and water paste onto a balloon, dried and then painted. Allow a space at the top large enough to fill with treats and then hang on a tree branch or similar with strong twine or string. Each child takes turn hitting the pinata with a stick or bat until all the treats fall out. Make sure the rest of the children are a safe distance from the “hitter” as they await their turn.

Pin the tail on the donkey

Draw an outline of a donkey on a large sheet of cardboard and place this up on a wall or corkboard at a low height. On a separate piece of card, draw a tail, or if you feel particularly creative, find a small scarf or fluffy fabric to act as the tail. Place a pin at the top of the tail

(take care here). Make as many tails as there are children and put their names on these. Put a large mark on the donkey where the child needs to aim. Each child is blindfolded and has a turn one-at-a-time to place the tail where they think it should be. The closest to the actual spot is the winner (have a prize ready!).

Get physical – race ideas

Burn off all the party treats with some solid

physical activity. Test the children’s balance and co-ordination with an egg-and-spoon race: each child at the start line holds a spoon with an egg on it (hardboiled recommended!). At the start command, they move as quickly as they can to the finish line without the egg falling off the spoon. They are only allowed to hold the spoon with one hand. If the egg falls they are out of the race. The quickest to cross the line with the egg still on the spoon is the winner! Another race variation is the sack race, suitable for all ages. Children place both of their legs inside a sack or pillow case that reaches their waist or neck and jump forward from a starting point toward a finish line. The first person to cross the finish line is the winner of the race.

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Let’s go tramping! Taking your children into the outdoors is a great way to spend time with your family, have fun and discover new things. The very idea of venturing into the wilds with children can seem daunting, but it’s easier than you think, with many options not too far from home. How far can you go on your first tramp?

Further than you think! The average 3-year-old should be able to walk a couple of kilometres. Be prepared to let toddlers walk some and be carried some. Older children of course should be able to go much further, but allow plenty of time for discovery along the way.

Keep them fed and watered

Young people need frequent top-ups when walking. Plan to stop and snack often. Take high-energy snacks like barley sugars for a quick boost and milo or soup in a thermos to warm up cold insides.

Keep them warm

Layers of clothing are the key. You can be warm while walking, but cool down quickly when you stop. If you’re carrying a toddler in a backpack check often that hands, feet and head are still warm.

Checklist of what to take: •

Warm clothing, wind-and-waterproof jacket Well-fitting sneakers with good tread Map and first aid kit Water bottle and plenty of high-energy food

• • •

Auckland tramping Okura Bush, by Paul Taylor

•

For pest-free islands, make sure you check your gear for stowaway pests before you leave Auckland

Where can we go? Tiritiri Matangi

Tiritiri Matangi Island is a great destination for a family daytrip. Managed by the Department of Conservation in partnership with the Supporters of Tiritiri Matangi, the island is an open sanctuary that provides a pest-free habitat for a number of rare and endangered species, such as takahe and kokako. You can walk the island’s tracks on your own or take one of the very popular guided walks. There are two main routes to get to the summit of the island: the Wattle Track takes about 30 minutes (the best option for young children and baby-buggy friendly) and the Kawerau

Kids helping in the community Volunteers are the backbone of society. Volunteers of all ages shape society and make our communities stronger, and a greater place to live in. Volunteering comes in so many shapes and forms, from individual to team volunteering, one off or ongoing, project or skills based the limits are endless. Volunteering gives you an opportunity to learn new skills and life experience, practise your skills in your chosen area/field of interest, network/meet new people and gain lifelong relationships, connect to your community and make a real difference, brighten your day and engage in something you are passionate about. New Zealanders contribute 270 million hours of formal, unpaid work for non-profit organisations annually. It is evident that the majority of volunteers are older. It’s not

Macpac Vamoose

Macpac’s Vamoose goes off the beaten track and is fully featured to ensure comfort and security for both parent and child. Proven Macpac load-carry technology combined with ultimate child comfort means the whole family can have hassle-free adventures together. Features include variable child seat-depth which can be adjusted as your child grows, Explorer harness designed for ease of use, balance and comfort, a generous 25lt base pocket for gear storage and the Sombrero sunshade and Rainbow rain cover included. The Vamoose is the perfect child carrier to get the whole family out and about. To win a Macpac Vamoose valued at $449.95 enter online at www.familytimes. co.nz or write your name and address on the back of an envelope or postcard and send to: Macpac Vamoose, PO Box 36 004, 21

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often that the work of young volunteers is mentioned, nor the benefits they receive from it, yet they have a profound impact upon the future of the society we live in. Younger children who volunteer are taught important life skills and positive healthy lifestyles; it improves the community; young children reap rewards as they are curious to achieve higher and seek challenges, and finally it encourages a life-long ethic to help others that is vital in today’s world. Volunteering New Zealand suggests to anyone who wants to actively get involved in volunteering to either fill in a form at www.volunteernow.org.nz or head to the nearest volunteer centre and they will align yours or your child’s needs to an appropriate organisation. There are 18 centres across New Zealand in all major cities Visit www. volunteernow.org.nz for more details. Christchurch, to reach us by 12 October 2012. www. macpac.co.nz

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Auckland tramping Tiritiri Matangi Island, Mitsuro Aoyagi. Track, which takes about an hour. There’s also a short walk to Hobbs beach – a great swimming beach. Overnight stays are possible in the Tiritiri Matangi bunkhouse, but it does get booked well in advance so check www. doc.govt.nz for availability.

Getting there:

Tiritiri Matangi is 4km off the coast of Auckland’s Whangaparaoa Peninsula. A family ferry pass (two adults and two children) is $161 from Auckland, or $125 from Gulf Harbour (visit www.360discovery.co.nz).

Okura Bush walkway

The Okura Bush walkway follows the Okura River estuary through coastal forest, with groves of nikau, pohutukawa and regenerating kauri. Okura River is part of the Long BayOkura Marine Reserve. After a 20-minute hill

climb the track drops down to the river’s edge. It then climbs to a headland before dropping quite steeply to Karepiro Bay where you can see the historic Dacre Cottage, built in the 1850s. Karepiro Bay is also a good spot to see wading birds such as stilts and oystercatchers. This part of the track takes about 1.5 hours one way, and should be manageable for a 5-year-old provided they’ve got plenty of stamina. For a longer walk, the track then continues for about another 1.5 hours to Stillwater. Shorebirds feed, roost and nest along the river’s shores, so please remember to leave your dogs at home.

Getting there: Start the Okura Bush walkway from Haigh Access Road, off East Coast Road north of Albany. By Amy Cameron, Department of Conservation

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The package includes:

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           

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Restaurant & Bar

Godmo iry

7/09/2012 10:03:54 a.m.

Education

Daddy says Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m still beautiful. Make sure you have working smoke alarms. Before itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s too late. Smoke alarms save lives. fire.org.nz The New Zealand Fire Service recommends long-life photoelectric smoke alarms.