Familial

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The Enchanting Encanto: On Breaking Generational Traumas

By: Mikaela Anne A. Laxa and Samantha Cheyenne Gail D. Pagunuran

Encanto, the newest Disney animated movie, gave more than just a last song syndrome and entertainment for kids and kids at heart. It somehow reminded us of all of our families' strengths and weaknesses and how they affect our happiness, growth, and relationships with other people.

Uncovering realities we are all not ready to acknowledge and resolve, the movie highlighted Madrigals’ extended family, slowly showing the conflicts within their casita.

Truth is, she can heal you with a meal

Assuming the responsibilities of being a chef, healer, and mother, Julieta Madrigal developed the tendency to be over-responsible. Her two older daughters, Isabela and Luisa, took after their mother in the way daughters naturally do.

As the eldest daughter, Isabela disregarded her happiness for the Madrigals’. Striving to be perfect and doing what is best for the family seem to be a trait of eldest daughters. Similarly, Luisa working without rest is evidently a trait she ripped straight from her mother’s book.

Everything seemed to have changed when Mirabel came into the family and received no gifts. Julieta that Camilo feels unnecessary pressure to make the townspeople happy.

The trauma responses in the two generations can actually be traced back to Abuela. On the night they were given a miracle, her husband died, leaving her to take care of the newborn triplets alone, along with leading the town. She never had a proper time to grieve because of her crucial role within the Encanto, and of her crippling fear of losing their home again, anything remotely negative within the family gets ignored.

This is an important factor in debunking generational trauma within the movie. It showed how the problem that children feel can probably be traced back to previous generations who may have consciously or unconsciously passed down their personal traumas to their children.

can be seen throughout the movie assuring Mirabel she didn’t need to prove anything to be considered a part of the family. She made sure to let her children feel as if they need to give their all into serving the town.

Their family dynamic portrayed how trauma can be passed down from one generation to another in seemingly harmless ways, when the truth is the younger generation often takes the brunt of it. As a mother figure, Julieta showed that parents can unlearn what they have been familiar with for the sake of their children’s well-being, and that it is never too late to correct errors made.

When she’s unhappy, well, the temperature gets weird

Being able to affect the weather and temperature around the Encanto, Pepa Madrigal’s life experiences provided a sure-fire way to develop emotional repression and the tendency to always please the people around her–two of the most common trauma responses.

Never allowed to be upset causes a hurricane, never allowed to worry causes a typhoon, Pepa eventually passed her trauma response to her two children–Dolores and Camilo. Dolores never spoke of what she felt for Mariano. She went along with the family’s plans, learning from her mother that they are not allowed to be upset no matter the situation.

Similarly, Camilo is canonically a people pleaser, who prides himself on making people laugh. As the line in the Family Madrigal song goes, “My primo Camilo won’t stop until he makes you smile today,” evidence They say he saw the future, one day he disappeared

Bruno, the only son of Abuela, has the gift of prophecy that frightens his family and community. He became the black sheep of the Madrigals that resulted in his disappearance.“We Don’t Talk About Bruno” reveals how families avoid confrontations and choose to distance themselves from relatives who are different–always leading to feeling not good enough.

There will always be expectations from you that feel so unreachable while obligating you to hide your true self. Plus, few have also been in the shoes of Mirabel–having no gift, being compared with the rest of the family, and constantly looking for ways to make them proud. Casa Madrigal breaking in Mirabel’s eyes represents the effects of not appreciating relatives for what they are.

Abuela blamed Mirabel for everything–increasing cracks, Bruno leaving, Luisa losing power, and Isabel being out of control. Sometimes, the thoughts following these treatments bring out the best in us yet also increase emotional damage. To fix our home and ourselves, we must have the courage to seek help, just like when Mirabel went to Bruno. Despite our mistakes or shortcomings, truth, acceptance, and forgiveness are essential to a harmonious familial relationship. Just like Abuela said, “The miracle is you, not some gift, just you.”

Each family member of the Madrigals was a victim of circumstances as they did everything to protect their family’s welfare. May this movie remind you that it is never too late to break your family’s generational traumas. Even if family is vital in your lives, you are free to choose what is best and healthy for you and to fix what is broken.

The Breadwinner Filling of the Sandwich Generation

By Jemina Eunice G. De Leon & Angelic Mizpah Chaste C. Bulanhagui

Change has always been humankind’s steep hill on the path of progression. For Filipinos, it involves making choices with traditional, social, and moral ties of no small measure– keeping the culture of the sandwich generation well and alive today.

Caught in between aging parents and growing children, middle-aged adults’ responsibility of providing physical and financial support continues to be a reality for the majority of Filipinos in the name of utang na loob— touching on a sense of kinsmanship and of gratefulness that does not diminish with returning the favor, effectively binding one to whom they owe this debt to. An Unspoken Rule

Utang na loob is not necessarily a bad thing. According to a study by Angelo Gundran, et. al. of Colegio de San Juan de Letran-Manila, it is a self-imposed obligation that seeks to sustain, strengthen, and honor relationships as a sign of respect.

It does, however, feed the sandwich generation too big a bite to chew and leave them bending over backward to sustain their families– especially of the common Filipino households– when it is supposedly a beautiful value of reciprocity.

The problem lies in the negative emotions that may arise as the burden becomes too heavy to bear, as well as its socio-economic consequences due to wages that are inadequate to sustain more than just the nuclear family unit.

Yet inasmuch as it is a burden, most Filipinos think of it as nothing more than a duty to family– the carrying on of customary familial attitude as those before them have done. The burnout breadwinners may feel has not stopped most from giving their life and blood into work. The Financial Impact

Parents who chose to live with this dynamic are in a financial crunch between caring for their children and their aging parents. But they are not the only ones who can feel this impact; the children are experiencing this as well.

Dayne Abanes, a 4th-year Medical Technology student, is a child of this dynamic. According to her, the idea of repaying her parents’ sacrifices would be rewarding but if she were to bear children, she would make sure that her kids do not feel like they owe her anything.

Additionally, Abanes believes that parents providing for the needs of their children is a basic common decency and a virtue of parenthood. “Our parents chose to have us in the first place, and that is what they signed up for once they decided to raise a child,” she furthered.

This raises concern towards parents, especially single mothers, who had not planned for bringing up children beforehand– as Excelsa Tongson of the University of the Philippines had found.

Over a period of 20 years, from 1990 to 2010, the country has seen an increase of females in the sandwich generation as household heads with or without partners. Despite the differences in circumstance, there is a need for both– and for all members of the sandwich generation– to be recognized as persons in need of support. However, at this time, even rigorous discourse is welcome. Squeezed in the Middle

In the Philippines, the situation is much more dire with the covering up of this issue under the pretext of cultural obligations, so much so that there is a non-availability of information about this group– effectively allowing them to go unnoticed and unsupported.

Despite the negative repercussions wrought by the sandwich generation

dynamic, Abanes was able to observe the good side of it all, saying “it avoids the occurrences of isolation, especially in this time wherein we are stuck in our home.”

In her eyes, her parents made the choice to take care of two generations of their family because, ultimately, the Filipino familial ties make all members of the family stronger despite challenges. “As a first-time parent [with me], they needed the guidance of their parents,” she shared. It was simply the way of the Filipinos.

Sandwich generation is a common dynamic, especially in the Philippines. It causes financial stress to the parent as they happen to serve two masters. This constitutes the fact that while sandwich generation promotes togetherness in a family, it squeezes the parent with problems of finance and emotions that can also affect both sides of the bread.

By John Vincent C. Cruz and Angelic Mizpah Chaste C. Bulanhagui

When the week-long suspension of classes turned into an indefinite closure of educational institutions spanning across the country, students were left with no choice but to adjust not only to virtual learning but also to a situation barely a handful have experienced prior: receiving education in-house.

Despite the shared predicament, each student has their distinct take on the situation—from being comfortable to feeling uneasy as the challenges of academic, physical, and social environments unfold. It is more important now than ever that concerns are addressed, and the peace is kept at home moving forward in the new normal.

Behind Closed Doors

“Toxic, exhausting, suffocating,” described fourth-year Medical Technology student Yve*, with regards to the long period of confinement at home. “Almost everyday na lang ata may nangyayaring worst scenario sa bahay namin kaya hindi ko na alam kung alin ‘yung pinaka-worst (Almost everyday the worst scenario happens at our house so I do not know which [situation] was the worst), she added.

For her, the atmosphere at home is not brought on by isolated cases of negativity, but one that stems from untoward attitudes that inevitably do not make for a good learning environment.

"To sum it up na lang ay pare-parehas lang naman ang issue, at iyon ay ang pagiging toxic ng bawat isa sa bahay in a way na hindi nila kino-consider 'yung nararamdaman ng bawat isa. Masyado sila makasarili at walang pakialam sa nararamdaman ng iba kasi pakiramdam nila ay sila lagi yung tama, na tama lahat ng ginagawa at sinasabi nila (To sum it up, the issue is just the same, and that is each one being toxic in the house in a way that does not consider other people's

“Definitely, it can also affect the person’s day-to-day life and quality of life. Isa diyan is ‘yung minsan hindi ka makabalik sa daily routine mo. S’yempre, katulad nung going to the school before, tapos bigla ka nakulong na online learning (Definitely, it can also affect the person’s day-to-day life and quality of life. One of those is not being able to go back to your daily routine. Of course, like going to the school before, then suddenly you’re trapped in online learning),” she added.

She shared the common symptoms of cabin fever include irregular sleeping patterns, sporadic eating habits, and moderate to extreme irritability. As a result, students tend to rely on unhealthy coping mechanisms such as emotional dumping online and dependence on vices such as alcohol.

Dr. Guevarra-Hocson also cited family disputes as a contributing factor to the cabin fever felt by students. “Unfortunately, ‘yung iba kaaway naman ‘yung magulang. May mga somewhat hindi pagkakasundo (Unfortunately, others [students] have problems with their parents. There is somewhat conflicts between the two).”

Given these circumstances, students have a rough time dealing with their responsibilities. In addition to the suffocating atmosphere of isolation, they also have to face their issues with family members in the household. Consequently, they improved the flaws found in the previous years and revamped the project.

Unlike before, the service is now available in the TAMS app, including the counseling notes, results of assessments, and other documents.

Hopeless Situation

While trying to fix and resolve conflicts is the best thing to do, there are special instances when the damage has already been made–as no amount of compromise or therapy can help mend broken relationships. Unhealed trauma can manifest throughout a person’s life, and constantly dealing with toxic family members will only halt the progression.

As much as each may hope to fulfill the romanticized notion of a complete, healthy family relationship, sometimes there is simply no way to return once the bridge has been broken— and there is no shame in that.

From Yve’s perspective, it is impossible to win over her family’s demands— a battle lost from the get-go. “Kung titingnan mo naman sa kahit anong anggulo ay ikaw talaga ‘yung tama, wala ka magagawa kun’di tanggapin na lang na ikaw ang mali sa kanilang paningin. Hindi ka mananalo sa kanila, at wala kang karapatan itama ang mali nila (If you look at it from any angle and you are in the right, there’s nothing you can do but to accept that you are wrong in their eyes. You will not win over them, and you have no right to

feelings. They are much too selfish and do not care about how others feel because they think they are always right, that everything they do and say is right)."

Cabin fever refers to the common response of people being confined for an extensive period of time. Despite not being recognized as a psychological illness, its adverse impact on the emotional, mental, and behavioral aspects of a person can be alarming.

With the limitations caused by the global health crisis, including isolation, people are likely to develop cabin fever, especially in hostile and toxic environments where they feel lonely, unsafe, and unheard.

Given that life goes on and students have to focus on their studies, having cabin fever can stifle their day-to-day activities as there is no fine line between responsibilities at school and home.

In the Lens of a Professional

Although unacknowledged as a mental illness, the feelings of restlessness, illness, the feelings of restlessness, isolation, and hopelessness– along with a disrupted routine and concentration– are realities that can be caused by cabin fever, says Dr. Sheila Guevarra-Hocson, Director of the University’s Guidance and Counseling. Establishing Solutions

For Dr. Guevarra-Hocson, having clear conversations with parents is crucial in making sure that they are seen and heard at home. Dedicating at least 15 minutes of their time to talk through their feelings is beneficial in establishing good and healthy relationships with family members.

“But not all parents are like that, but usually we go for that communication. So you build rapport, you go for observation, you express your feelings, your needs and requests”, she advised.

Last January 2022, the FEU Guidance and Counselling recalibrated their services, including TeleWellbeing, a project started in 2018 to help students cope with their stress and problems, as well as breaking the stigma and malpractice on dealing with matters related to mental health.

“It’s an online counseling platform for academic, personal, social, and career concerns wherein they can go for counseling for every day-to-day problem”, she explained.

She said that when the pandemic started, appointments were increasing—and naturally, they had to cater to the needs of the students.

Illustrated by Mary Vel Custodio

correct them),” she expressed, justifying her decision to not air out her sentiments.

Yve added, “hindi na lang ako nagsasalita para hindi na lumaki pa ‘yung problema. Tanggap lang nang tanggap kumbaga kasi alam kong hindi naman ako papakinggan at maiintindihan (I do not speak so the problem will not get bigger. [I] accept and accept because I know they will not listen and understand me).”

Open communication is crucial in solving most problems, including those with our family members. However, comprehension is also a key element in ensuring that the needs of both parties are met, and the lack of such component will ultimately worsen the situation.

Students should have access to a healthy space conducive to their learning experience, and parents must learn how to compromise with the needs of their children to maintain a harmonious relationship at home. However, this does not apply to all—as even reconciliation is not enough to fix what was already broken, and only time will heal the wounds and trauma accumulated from toxic households.

*The name of the student has been changed to protect their identity.